Christmas will be here before we know it, so it's never too early to start thinking about what to get our loved ones.
Commercials will tell us that moms want candles and bath bombs or "wine mom" products.
But is that what they really want? The only way to really know is to ask! We wanted to hear directly from mothers to learn exactly what they are looking for this holiday season.
Redditor TheTitanCoeus asked:
"Moms of Reddit, what the hell should we get you for Christmas?"
Here are some of the best answers.
Something she doesn't get enough of.
"An hour of goddamn peace and quiet."
"At least that's what my wife wants."
"I came here to say a weekend home alone. I can't even begin to relax in an hour, I've to clean up first!"
"Same here. No time for myself with all the house chores and cleaning!"
"An entire day off from any obligations - and that includes having to remind you to do things."
"Dishwasher needs unpacking? Just do it, don't make me ask you to do it."
"Laundry needs folding? Go get it done, I don't want to see it or have to remind you to do it."
"Kids need feeding? You know where the kitchen is."
"Just.... let my brain have the day off, yeah?"
"That will result in the dishwasher having 2 days worth of dishes, kids being hungry, and dinner being some microwave food."
"You can't just except him to remember everything. A better idea would be to spend the day in some spa."
"Unless he also wishes for the same thing, and you settle on hiring a professional housekeeper XD"
"I am getting increasingly depressed by the number of responses in here that amount to 'things you should already be getting regularly anyway.'"
"Why do so many women put up with useless men? Why would you live with someone who makes your life more difficult?"
"If my wife said this I couldn't live with the shame."
"If you're a single mother it changes things a bit, but if your kids are more than six months past old enough to do chores they're old enough to do them unprompted."
"From a once upon a time wife who tried too hard to be the Flash in her only marriage, thank you. This means more than you know."
Get the house cleaned and send her to the spa while you're at it.
"Have the house professionally cleaned! Like detailed! Have it done while you send me to a spa day and you're good for Mother's Day and my birthday too!"
"My mom does housekeeping. Drop $140 and that house will sparkle."
"Massage gift certificates, not just one, but 6-10. Growing a person does some weird stuff to your body and then you get older with not time so everything hurts."
"Appointments! Lashes, hair, laser, etc."
Don't forget the car.
"Auto detailed car. Kids make cars do dirty. Having someone else clean the car would be so refreshing to many moms I'm sure."
People Share Their Unexpected Happiest Moments | George Takei’s Oh MyyyWhile many of life's big events like weddings and births bring us joy, even the smallest of gestures or gifts can leave a lasting impression. Especially if y...
Use your hands and get creative.
"Make me something! Bake me bread, paint for me, draw me something, frame a photo you took, make me a playlist .. show me your art!!!!"
"I honestly had no idea what the hell I wanted until I accidentally overheard my boyfriend telling his mom he wanted to completely redecorate our bathroom in my favorite color as a Christmas gift. And I then realized that is exactly what I want for Christmas."
"Now I have to pretend I didn't hear that conversation lol."
"'Like ohmygosh you painted the bathroom in my favorite color lavendeeee-Teal. You painted the bathroom teal!? That's not my favorite color!'"
"A storage unit for all of the clutter. That's it."
"That's all I want. The clutter is stressing me out. Actually, I think I'm low-key depressed because of it."
"I just want to feel peaceful in my home."
"And maybe some candles that smell like almonds. Or the new Stanley Tucci book."
Cook a nice meal, maybe more than once.
"When my kids were younger I asked for a unique Mother's Day gift and it was one of the best gifts I ever got."
"I asked them to cook a dinner for the family (4 of us) once a week for three months. They had to work together AND clean up. And they needed to LMK 24 hours in advance about what ingredients were needed so I had time to go to the store."
"They were 12 and 16 so I knew they could handle it. There were a few hiccups along the way but they worked through it and it was awesome for all of us!"
"A win win! They grew in their cooking skills, got closer as brothers, gave us parents a break, and they learned to appreciate us more too."
Make it personal.
"Literally anything you know I'd actually want. Not some sh*t you randomly let the kids pick from the store. Know. Who. I. Am. As. A. Person. Mom is not my identity."
"If one is not specific, one gets a basket of random bath products or a candle."
"A hairless guinea pig that looks like a tiny hippo."
"I'm totally fine with the stuff my kid picks. I like to see her face light up when I unwrap the gift she chose. That being said, it usually comes with a side gift from my husband, like a bracelet or some earrings."
"As a kid I don't know who mom is as a person, because you were always mom to us/me. Also if others are like me, which i know they are, moms true colors and interests never really show in front of the kids. I have no idea what my mom likes aside from traveling but she won't go alone and none of us can go with her school, work, else and she has no friends."
"When I was growing up my mom always said she was not my friend and only spoke to us to scold us and stayed alone. It took me until I was an adult to realize she didn't want to be a mom and was depressed. Took me until I was 30 to actually form a relationship with her where I could ask what she likes and wants. Just putting it out there so people can know to be understanding if mom doesn't want to talk, and it might get better someday."
Take the decision making out of the equation.
"Plan a super nice date and take me on it. I make enough decisions everyday for the household and I just need to not care and enjoy."
"Oh my, yes, this. The greatest relief any day is when I don't have to make every single decision."
Maybe some moms do want candles and bath bombs!
"New, luxurious bath towels. Soft, thick ones."
But it all depends on the person.
"Make up, PJs, jewelry, favorite skincare products, some nice trainers, a gift voucher for something, paid for hairdressing appointment."
"I mean it obviously all depends on what your mum likes, if it was my mum I know she loves gaming so it'd be a ps4 game she really wants."
Tell her you love her.
"Show up and tell me you love me. For all the stuff I did and all the sacrifices I made. The few years we had make your own Mac n cheese night because I had no money and various sprinkles and jimmies to put on dinner."
"Hey. I know it means nothing coming from an Internet stranger, but you sound like an amazing parent. And I thank you for putting your family first and doing what you had to to make sure they were OK."
"A phone call and just let me hear your voice, tell me everything about your life and let me continue to be so very proud of your accomplishments and your failures. Let me enjoy hearing about the wonderful adult you've become. Let me hear your frustrations and your pains, your bad judgment calls and your sorrows but know that I hurt for you too but nothing you ever do will make me love you any less. You are the air I breathe."
Let her know you're thinking of her.
"New empty nester chiming in- One son just started college 2.5 hour drive away and the other son just graduated from college and got a job a six hour drive away."
"Here's what a great gift for me would be: For three weeks send me a POD, picture of the day."
"It would let me know that they were thinking of me and would make me see something of their day."
Some moms want to get their gifts themselves.
"Etsy gift card. I'll buy what I want."
"Honestly candy and gift cards so I can actually shop for myself..."
"$100 gift voucher to her favourite skincare/makeup place."
Moms deserve so much more than we give them for everything they do.
They raise us, they run the house, they work hard, and they rarely get the praise they deserve.
Give your mother something that she really wants this Christmas, but don't forget that you can show her how much you love her any day of the year.
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When we hear the words "addict" or "addiction", our mind usually jumps to drugs and alcohol.
But addictive behavior transcends those common vices.
Indeed, people can find themselves becoming addicted to just about anything.
While some pose a less significant threat to one's physical health, they remain no less serious a problem.
Redditor Windsorbear97 was curious to hear which addictions the Reddit community felt weren't given enough attention of concern, leading them to ask:
'What is an addiction that nobody takes seriously?"
Time to cut back on the screen time...
"My phone and my usage of said phone."- VagueViper88
And not the kind you find on stage...
"Some people thrive and are addicted to drama and chaos."- CM_NRS
You can't just have one
"Binge eating."- Loulabee1983
Oh look at that, I must have it!
"Especially if you grew up poor and have more money when you're an adult."
"My mom was so bad with this that when she died it was a disaster figuring out what she had paid for and where she had debt."
"I have a friend who would spend her whole paycheck on Amazon purchases and wouldn't even see this as being an issue, even when she would beg her parents or rich men for money to make rent."
"They usually buy junk they don't even need or clothes."
"So many clothes."
"They always shop when they are not feeling well, it is 100% a coping mechanism."
"I was in my 20s when I realized that no one else had a mom who would go to Walmart with a 100$ budget cause they were feeling sad."
"Such an obviously expensive addiction too." - User Deleted
How "social" is it though?
"Dopamine feedback loop from various forms of electronic entertainment and social media sites."- Clintman
"Went to a counsellor after I had taken any sort of social media app off of my phone in an attempt to stop using it to distract myself from what I'm feeling because I'm currently going through a break up."
"Basically as soon as I got too emotional in the session, she suggested we do this blinking exercise where you look at a nice photo and blink and do that a few times."
"we did this because she 'knew distractions worked well for me'."
"That's why I'm back here as well."
"Seems pointless to distract myself if my 'good' option is to be distracted by someone else sitting across the room."- Glum_Advertising_958
Can't think of getting through my day without it.
"Caffeine, without a doubt in my mind."- No_Relationship9732
Big money... not really
"It’s taken seriously to an extent, but things like the lottery are very glamorized, and there’s so many tv competitions and radio competitions etc out there nowadays and they’re kinda gateways."- Safe-Initiative4266
There's no harm in putting something off... until it's too late!
"It’s embarrassing because I should be able to 'just do it', but then a task that shouldn’t feel too hard will feel so daunting and impossible, I’ll end up doing it late or sometimes not at all, and the whole cycle is the root of so many problems in my life."
"It’s emotionally and functionally horrible when it gets bad enough."
"I’ve read all the advice out there and none of it works for me for longer than a day or two."
"I’m at my wit’s end and feel crazy because it’s so illogical but I can’t stop."- thatbassonist
Indeed, if you find yourself unable to kick a particular habit, it might be worth asking yourself if this is, in fact, just a habit.
And then find the courage to ask for help should you need it.
Banning and censorship is nothing new in America.
Or, in the world at large really.
It all starts on a small scale.
They start stripping us of things at school and work.
You know, all for the greater good.
Redditor t0rnado_thegamerwanted to discuss the items that have been taken out of circulation for ridiculous reasons. They asked:
"What's the stupidest thing your school/work banned?"
I feel the banning has only just begun. But let's see what we've already lost.
FallenGIF by LeannimatorGiphy
"We weren't allowed to build a snowman because it 'might fall on you.' They suggested we build a 'snow forest' instead - snowballs on the ground > 1 meter apart. Nobody built snow forests."
"6th graders and only 6th graders weren't allowed to draw outside of assigned art projects. I heard any number of reasons for the ban--'gang signs,' vandalism, distraction--but never got one for why the ban didn't apply to 5th or 7th graders. My only guess is that one of the 6th grade teachers just really hated seeing children's artwork."
"My primary school (age 5 to 11) in the UK banned talking during lunch. Every single child had to eat lunch in a big room, in absolute silence. No talking to friends or socialising allowed. It was pretty insane now I think about it."
"I was gonna comment this too. My school banned talking at lunch if it got too loud. We had a cup at each table the teachers would make us turn them over and stop talking frequently each lunch."
"The theory was that someone would choke and no one would hear them if it was loud. Incidentally, the only time somebody choked was during a period of quiet and nobody knew because YOU CAN’T TALK WHILE CHOKING!! The person was fine though."
The Rule Book
"The lack of shoes, as in there is an specific rule against it detailing what should and should not be worn in your feet, all this because a friend of mine read the Rule book and it only said that 'Students must always come wearing appropriate pants and shirts that do not break the etiquette code.' He went to school with shoes and took them off at the entrance for a semester just to piss off the principal. I love that guy."
CodeCharlie Brown Snow GIFGiphy
"Anything with a snowman on it. Apparently that was code for cocaine."
Wow, Snowmen really get a bad rap out in these streets.
OuchGo Easy On Me GIF by AdeleGiphy
"We weren't allowed to say anything was easy because it might hurt the feelings of kids who didn't think that thing was easy."
"Back in my high school, they banned water bottles unless they were clear bc people had been sneaking alcohol into school, but like clear alcoholic drinks are a thing?? so it basically did nothing."
"Our school did that, too, after previously banning water bottles altogether. One of my teachers then got really bent out of shape about so many people using disposable plastic bottles but the school was really strict about how clear your water bottle had to be and not everyone had a qualifying reusable bottle on hand so what did she expect?"
in the ye' olden days...
"Bottle flipping when that was a trend in the ye' olden days long since forgotten. I don’t know why, and it’s not like they did a good job telling us about the ban so my first and only detention I’ve ever gotten was from flipping a stupid water bottle. That and the 'fight club' that formed in PE but that’s a different story."
"Probably Yugioh cards.They were banned because a group of moms made up a rumor that in another unspecified country a kid had died while holding a fiend-type monster, so clearly they were satanic. Years later I learned that one of those moms was my friend's mom and she just didn't want to buy the cards for her son."
Ho Ho HoMerry Christmas Reaction GIF by Macy'sGiphy
"Saying Christmas. Had to be called 'the current religious festival.' And no decorations were allowed."
Why are we banning the wrong things? This is nonsense.
People say parenting is one of the most rewarding things in life. That all of the lack of sleep, constant crying, and stress is worth it when you see your baby smile. And all of that is true, for the most part.
However, being a parent is hard, and it's not always easy to give that unconditional love. Sometimes, you do your best for your kids and they still turn out to be people you can't really reconcile with.
You'll always love your kids, but sometimes it's near impossible to like them.
Redditor eyriesistable asked:
"At what point did you realize you don’t like your own kid?"
Some Reddit Users Talked About Momentary Dislike
These are parents of young, cute toddlers and are mostly joking about disliking their kid.
Laughing At Pain
"My 2 year old just yanked my hair and laughed when I said 'ouch!'. I still love him but he's a little f*cker sometimes."
The Classic Toddler Offense
"My two year old got sent home from daycare today because he bit three different kids, unprovoked, before noon."
"He stole my cat."
"Only 18 months old the little prick and he's always had a fascination with animals, any time he sees one he points, starts walking towards it going "aaaaaaaww""
"Anyway, me and my cat used to be best buddies but currently my cat is sat in his lap whilst he's stroking him going "aaaaaaaww""
"And it's the same every day"
A Drinking Problem
"I walked in to her room and caught my kid sitting on her bed drinking a Pepsi. She has always known we are a Faygo household. I can look past some things but when you disrespect me in my own house I just don’t know how you get past something like that."
Waiting To Get Her Back
"Every time the lil' f*cker wakes us up before 5 am. Can't wait untill her teenage years, I will be up at dawn every day asking why she isn't getting out of bed and make some of her day instead. Revenge is only 10 years away."
Others Talked About Issues That May Never Be Resolved
These are parents who don't like their kids' personalities and don't see anything ever changing.
A Missing Bond
"For real, I used to have an issue for several years with my three daughters. I didn't feel the parental love that one would expect. I would still protect them from harm and all that but I did not have the emotional connection I thought I would with my kids. I spoke out of concern with my wife about it several times and she suspects that it was how I was raised by an abusive father figure. Nowadays the love is there but I feel that I missed out on too many things when they were growing up. I did not bond when I was supposed to I guess. I never really went out of my way to hold them when they were little. I just pray that I hid that fact well enough from them that they don't find out. I don't want them to think I don't care..."
Some Of Them Want To Use You
"When they became a narcissistic adult-trash talking everyone for attention, me included. They are a user (of people) like I’ve never seen before. I still love them, but do not like them."
0 for 3
"My grandmother had 3 kids and doesn't like any of them. Loves all three but doesn't like them. The first is just an a-hole who used her for money and her house like a hotel. Second... they just don't click, total opposites. Third is a needy lil mooch/hoarder who throws tantrums over stuff like the frosting color on Easter cookies because "that's not how daddy did it when I was little""
He Is Mean
"He started hating on me from an early age. He would literally give me the cold shoulder - monosyllabic responses to me while not looking up from his games, then become open and chatty when anyone else entered the room. I ate it for years - he's just a kid, right?"
"I ended up leaving his dad. He blamed me for everything and called the cops on me after yelling at me over the phone."
"I talked to his brother after the cops left. He was so frustrated on my behalf and only then told me all the low-key things younger brother had done under the radar; he was more mean than I realized; I thought it was only directed at me. My older son was sympathetic and made me feel better. He said his younger brother had a lot of issues."
"I really don't give my younger son an option to call the cops on me again."
Lie, Lie, Lie
"I think it's kinda sad how I know that my stepfather (who had his own daughter) wished I was his kid instead of her. To be fair, the girl kept making stories up about what we did to her and she was alienating him from the rest of his family. I think I can even pinpoint the day he realised that this wasn't miscommunication but rather her just lying about everything."
"She ran away from home and after years of fighting it was finally calm. And honestly, screw her, she didn't have to lie to anyone about us, she didn't have to steal from me or my mum to the point that a gift for my birthday was a lock on my door."
"I hope she doesn't screw over whoever is taking care of her now but I doubt it."
These are some intense stories! Parenting is hard, and the truth is, when it's good, it's good, but when it's bad, it's really bad.
Have you ever had someone try to comfort you, but ended up feeling worse after what you just heard?
It happens more frequently than people would like, when what were meant to be words of comfort and encouragement end up having the exact opposite effect.
Indeed, sometimes we might be better off, or able to sleep somewhat easier had we not been told a certain statistic or recent study, which paints an optimistic light, but is bad news nonetheless.
Redditor Soupmandog589 was curious to learn what optimistic facts aren't quite as comforting as they seem, leading them to ask:
"What’s a fact that sounds comforting but is actually highly disturbing?"
I'd rather not crash at all.
"You’re statistically more likely to die in a car crash on the way to the airport than you are in a plane crash."- 593shaun
Cold comfort at its finest.
"You did your best."- a_fortunate_accident
The possibilities are endless...
"You never truly know what anyone really thinks about you.'
"I mean this like super literally."
"Like you never know if your spouse is planning on killing you, you never know if a stranger is keeping an eye on you thinking about assaulting you.'
"Several possibilities that you could never know."- bluburry420
"There are hundreds if not thousands of versions of you in the minds of other people."
"Depending on how many people you have met in your life."- He-Who-Laughs-LastMean Girls Gossip GIF by Paramount MoviesGiphy
I hope that day is a long time coming...
"One day you'll never feel pain again."- Antdawg2400·
Ignorance is bliss... or is it?
'The most peaceful way to die is in your sleep, but you’ll go to sleep not knowing you’ll never see anything ever again."- Hkro-2
We won't live to see it... but others will...
"There will be a point in time where humans go extinct."
"We wont experience it but imagine our future generations will see the 'end of the world'.
"You saw... nothing."- SunTzy69End Of The World Netflix GIF by LOVE DEATH + ROBOTSGiphy
The truth is out there... maybe...
"Either alien life exists, or we are totally alone in the universe."- ALA02
Don't get too excited
"You're really really sick, you have no energy, no appetite, and just the will to do nothing at all."
"Let’s say this is your grandpa in this situation."
"All the sudden grandpa calls you and says he wants to eat so much that it hurts and he wants to go do some fun projects, this sudden burst of energy kinda thing."
"Well you drive to the hospital to find that your grandpa has just died minutes after he called you."
"The nurse will then explain to you that this is very common when people are dying to just have a sudden burst of energy."- ReaperGrin
Either way, we're screwed
"While we're losing a lot of forests in the tropics due to climate change, we're actually gaining a lot of forest in the northern latitudes, and into formerly grassland areas as more available CO2 allows them to grow in more arid regions."
"And everyone loves trees, right?"
"The problem is the climate crisis is also a biodiversity crisis, and habitat loss, like grasslands or tundra becoming forest, is arguably even harder on species than changes in weather patterns."- RIPEOTCDXVItime-lapse forest GIFGiphy
Kind as it is to offer comfort to those who need it, it is also wise to think very carefully when choosing your words.
After all, as the saying goes "when you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all."