There are few things a parent dreads more than getting a call from their children's school in the middle of the day.
As the news that greets them on the other end of the phone is seldom good.
More often than not, their child has gotten themself into fairly serious trouble, owing to a prank gone wrong, or possibly an act of horrific bullying.
Or worse, their child has suffered a serious injury and needs immediate medical attention.
On rare occasions, however, the reason they receive a call from their child's teacher or principal might not be all bad.
If they're still not greeted with what can be considered good news, the reason behind the call might result in a chuckle, if not an outright belly laugh.
Redditor Background_Humor7271 invited parents to share the most hilarious reasons they were called to pick their child up early from school, leading them to ask:
"Parents of reddit what's the funniest reason you've been called to pick your child up from school?"
Is that supposed to happen?
"Not school but daycare, he tried to force a fart to make a girl laugh and sh*t his pants."- Muh2021account
fart GIFGiphyWhere Did That Come From?!?
"Bloody nose, possible concussion and enough blood from the cut on his head that they had to close the bathroom."
"Why you ask?"
"He was running to the bathroom already and his crush came into view."
"So he kept on running while he stared behind him."
"When he finally turned to see where he was going."
"'There was a wall there suddenly'."- nicolasknight
One Dedicated Prankster...
"It’s not funny til the end, but my daughter was in pre-k at the time."
"They had a nap time but one day she wouldn’t wake up."
"The teachers were making jokes and trying to get her to wake up."
"After a while they panicked and ran her to the nurse."
"She was breathing just not waking up."
"They then called 911 who came and they did the salt stick and she wasn’t responding."
"Then she just woke up."
"They were so confused on what had happened that they brought her to the hospital to run some tests."
"They found nothing."
"She later told me she was in a deep sleep but woke up and just kept faking it."
"This girl took the salt stick 3 times and didn’t react."
"This child."- One_Mirror8458
Wake Up Holiday GIF by Dunkin’GiphyMore Likely Than You'd Expect!
"Got bit by a gopher."
"You cant make this up."- wentzr1976
How Tall Was That Play Set?!?!
"When my oldest son was in daycare, I got a call that he was on the roof."
'He climbed the play set and somehow got onto the roof of the building."
"The guy that ran the daycare was a new owner that my son simply did not like."
"The guy called me to tell me he was on the roof and would not come down."
"I had to leave work and go convince him to come down."- MaggieMews
It Was Self-Defense I Tell You!
"I was the kid in a funny situation."
"I was always a bit of a playground avenger, so I would bully the bullies."
"After I was the one targeted the school once called my parents, the conversation went like this:"
"'So... A group of boys tried to bully your daughter by calling her names-'"
"'Oh no, is she okay?'"
"'Well, yea, we're actually calling you because she just hit all of the boys with her lunchbox until they stopped'."
"My parents proudly tell this story to this day lol."- SultanaShalhoub
Episode 19 Fighting GIF by The SimpsonsGiphyCan't Say It Didn't Work...
"One time my grandma had to come pick me up because I decided that for April fools day, I'd take a bunch of ketchup packs, fold them in half and place them under the nubs of all the toilet seats so they would explode all over the back of your legs when you sit down."
"I recall walking into the principals office, and he was laughing his a** off.'
"I still got suspended for a week."- Youpunyhumans
Um... Could You Repeat That?...
"My parents got called because when I was 11 we had a visiting priest open the floor to questions at school."
"The subjects discussed included marriage."
"I stuck up my hand and asked 'If my parents get divorced, are they still brother and sister?'"
"What was REALLY hilarious is that my parents forced both the principal and the priest to apologize afterwards."
"My parents are brother and sister in-laws as well as married."
"They actually met at the wedding of my father's brother to my mother's sister."
"Neither the principal nor the priest let me expand on the question and refused to let me talk further until my parents showed up."
"My father did afterwards lecture me on 'lying by omission', but he was laughing too much through it for me to take it seriously."
"I never got invited to another lecture from the clergy until I graduated from high school."- rtangwai
priest GIFGiphyNacho Overload
"Mother had to pick me up after I went to school dressed as nacho libre in his fancy clothes and ripped the pants reenacting the butt flex scene in front of my main class." - huffcox
Oddest Ducklings
"Oldest kid was eating the teacher’s granola bars off her desk for a couple of weeks before she figured out who was taking them. He thought they were snacks for everybody lol. Youngest was put in the corner for whatever reason and the teacher caught her licking the wall. She’s still a freakin weirdo." - tbama11
Wallflower
"He walked into a wall. When asked by the nurse why he did that, his answer was, 'no one told me not to.' The nurse couldn't control her laughter when she said this and apologized profusely. It's OK though, I laughed too. He was fine by the way!" - InPerfectCircles
American Vandal
"My mom had to come pick me up because I and a friend decided to steal a tube of hot pink frosting from homeck class. I drew a penis on the side of the football fields announcement booth. It was very bright pink and very big. The sun literally baked it on there and lasted for a good solid 5 years till they repainted it. I was suspended for a day over it." - theresacreamforthat
Demerits
"My son was in second grade and he got a demerit for farting. It wasn’t the actual fart that got to the merit, it was his response."
"The teacher asked “what will you do next time to make sure this doesn’t happen again?” and my son answered ”Next time I fart in class, I won’t laugh as loud and get a demerit!”
"I still have that note his baby book, couldn’t bear to throw it away." - Ok-Fishing-6604
Garlic
"My Uncle used to get sent home from school because he smelled bad. He would eat raw garlic on purpose to get sent home. The man is a legend. I named my first child after him." - Embarrassed-Intern52
Duck
"I had to pick up my son from 2nd grade for punching another kid."
"My son has always been a very literal child. He just has no way to automatically know if someone is being serious or kidding. If he suspects you're not being truthful, he'll ask."
"Anyway, this kid put his hoodie on backwards and kept pulling the hood over his face and saying he could see through the hood. My kid kept asking if he was kidding, and the kid assured him several times he was not."
"So my kid swung his arm and knocked the kid upside his dome. Forearm, not fist, but it still sent the kid stumbling into a desk. Kid went to the nurse for some comforting, my son went to talk to the principal."
"The principal sent him back to the room, then called me. She stifled a couple of giggles when she told me what he said as to why he did it. "Well, Ms Principal, he said he could see through the hood. If he could really see through the hood, he would have ducked. But he didn't, which means I was right and he was lying."" - pedantic_dullard
The elephant in the Room
"She’s feeling sick because of “the elephant meat that Daddy brought from Africa and made me eat”. Imagine having a serious discussion with a principal about how unethical it is to eat elephant meat and illegally import it to Europe, while you’re just repeatedly saying: “And you believed her?!” - OneAceFace
One can only imagine that these parents would have still preferred not to get these calls.
As they still resulted in a trip to the doctor's office and/or, a stern talking to or punishment.
However, at least these were childhood instances that both child and parent would rather not forget in a few year's time.
Far from it, these are stories which will probably be told, with unending delight, for the rest of their lives.
Inducing endless laughter along the way.
Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.
Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?
But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.
It would be so great to be sure there is something else.
But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.
Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:
"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"
Sensations
Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."
PeachesnPain
Recovery
"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."
"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."
"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."
good_golly99
Take Me Back
"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."
"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."
rayrayrayray
Free
The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."
TooReDTooHigh
This is why I hate surgery.
You just never know.
Shocked
Giphy"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."
Admirable_Buyer6528
The SOB
"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."
"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”
1-cupcake-at-a-time
Colors
"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"
Hannah_LL7
"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"
huntokarrr
The Fog
"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."
"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."
Fluffy-Hotel-5184
Through the Walls
"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."
"She's quite alive and well today."
Hot-Refrigerator6583
Well let's all be happy to be alive.
It seems to be all we have.
Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.
The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.
Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.
Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:
"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"
Redditors didn't see these coming.
Shiver Me Timbers
"I’m always cold now!"
– Telrom_1
"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."
– r7ndom
"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."
– mr_remy
Drawing Concern
"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."
– dee-fondy
"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"
"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."
– LizardofDeath
Unleashing Insults
"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”
"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."
– alanamablamaspama
Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight
"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."
– KeltarCentauri
"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."
– KatMagic1977
"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."
– Jaew96
These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.
Shopping
"I can buy clothes in any store I want."
– WaySavvyD
"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."
– ganache98012
No More Symptoms
"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."
– colleennicole93
Expanding Capabilities
"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."
– Ramblonius
People Change Their Tune
"How much nicer people are to you."
"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"
– LiZZygsu
"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"
"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"
– awholedamngarden
It's gonna take some getting used to.
Bones Everywhere
"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."
– Princess-Pancake-97
"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."
– bekastrange
Knee Pillow
"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."
– snic2030
"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."
– Strongbad23
More Mobility
"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."
"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."
– dma1965
People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.
But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.
That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.