
Former Friends Reveal The Things That Destroyed Their Strongest Relationships
[rebelmouse-image 18349681 is_animated_gif=Friendship is supposed to be one of the closest relationship bonds a person can have. That doesn't mean it's always sunshine and roses. When friendships go wrong, holy CRAP do they go wrong. It's only with that kind of injury that a person can build up the kind of rage it takes to truly hold a grudge. Long story short, ending friendships can get ugly and we're about to talk about it. One Reddit user posed the question:
Things are about to get high-drama and NSFW, so grab your popcorn and your favorite sassy reaction memes; we're about to do this:
Didn't Make The Cut
[rebelmouse-image 18349682 is_animated_gif=My friend and I both tried out for the badminton team in grade 7. After the first tryouts they call back for a second set. The list was posted on the bulletin board, so after class she went and checked (I asked her to tell me if I made it). She came back saying neither of us did, and I thought that was the end of it.
The second tryouts were happening the next morning before class. During homeroom that day a girl in my class asked me why I wasn't at tryouts. I told her that I didn't make it, at least that's what Friend told me. She informed me that I did, so I went and checked at morning break. My name was on the list. I went and talked to the gym teacher in charge and he let me do a quick tryout at lunch. I didn't end up making the team (which I was okay with, I'd already accepted that fact). This was now 10 years ago and I'm so salty. I've dealt with a lot of s*** from this girl, but we're still friends.
They Fled The Country???
[rebelmouse-image 18349683 is_animated_gif=This was 7 years ago and I'm still mad about it. I'm 30 now and we were friends from the age of 4 to 23 so almost 20 years, and we had borrowed money from each other all the time and always paid it back, so one day he asked to borrow a few grand for a car and I was like sure no problem, he'll pay me back next month like he always does (I borrowed the same amount from him before FYI). I transferred the money and then didn't hear from him for a few days so went round his parents and turns out he used the money to move abroad and set up a new life with a random woman he met online. I almost wish I could say it didn't work out but they got married and had 3 kids and now live in a nice big house, but I gave him all the money I had at the time and it ruined me for quite a long time and I got into debt and other issues which just spiralled from that point. I know which city he lives in but not much more than that, and haven't had what I would consider a best friend again since.
The 20-year Dinner Ban
[rebelmouse-image 18349684 is_animated_gif=Mom planned a small dinner party with another family. She cooked all day, set the table, probably made my dad put a playlist together, and waited for them to arrive. The call and say "oh, we can't make it, something better came up".
They are still friends, but my mother hasn't invited them over for dinner in 20 years. And my mom is an amazing cook.
To this day they still say "oh, we never come over for dinner any more!" And my mom will respond, "yes, that's right, you don't." I like to think I inherited her grudge-holding ability.
Catfish
[rebelmouse-image 18349685 is_animated_gif=I was really lonely in high school and bullied a lot. When I was about 14 or 15, my only "best friend" at the time teamed up with two girls who didn't like me to essentially Catfish me. I don't know why, we weren't fighting or anything. Anyway, they pretended to be a guy romantically interested in me and e-mailed me out of the blue. They talked to me for months as this guy, before I trusted "him" enough to give him answers to really personal questions.
I found out who "he" really was after they told everyone every scrap of personal information I'd told my online friend. And it was some pretty personal s***. I was already depressed, and this experience ended up making me start self harming - a habit I only finally kicked about a year ago.
F*ck you, Melissa. It's been 15 years and I still think it was a shitty thing to do to me.
Justifiable Anger
[rebelmouse-image 18346010 is_animated_gif=Rented my property and kept the money without telling me while simultaneously f-ing my girlfriend. Yeah, I'm still angry.
The Wedding Brush-Off
[rebelmouse-image 18349687 is_animated_gif=A friend texted me the night before my wedding to say that she couldn't attend because she couldn't afford to go. (Wedding was a 30 minute car journey from home) The day after the wedding she had posted photographs on Facebook being out drinking the night of my wedding. Haven't spoken to her since.
Choosing The Girl Over A Lifelong Friend
[rebelmouse-image 18349688 is_animated_gif=Not really salty about it anymore, it's been to long. My best friend growing up stopped being friends because of a girl he just meet. We became friends when we were 4. He was 3 months older them me, so growing up we went to school. Our parents were friends. We went to the same church. So we spent most of our time hanging out.
When we were 17 he met this girl and after the first time she met me she told him she didn't want him hanging out with me, right in front of me. Without hesitation he told me to leave and never talked to me again. It's been nearly 20 years now. I see him about once every couple of years. He's married to her now. He's not allowed to have friends outside of her family and is completely miserable. His parents can't stand her because of how unbelievably rude she is to them and rarely lets them see their grand-kids. It's been so long now that I could care less and barely know them, but it's not something I would forgive.
I Do... Not Blame You.
[rebelmouse-image 18349689 is_animated_gif=My best-man is now engaged to my ex-wife. Dead Sea salty about that still.
Taking A Homeless Person's Money
[rebelmouse-image 18349690 is_animated_gif=When I was in my late teens, I was essentially homeless. One of my absolute best friends was moving away for college and offered to let me stay in his apartment for the remainder of the lease if I would cover half the rent. I was working at a sandwich place at the time, not making more than $7.50 per hour, so it sounded like a great deal.
I paid him for the first month, and was evicted less than month later by the apartment managers. Turns out my bestie hadn't been paying rent, took my money and left me without a place to live.
One of my co-workers let me stay with him until I could get back on my feet.
A few years ago, my former friend saw me at a bar during the holidays and tried to talk to me. Without a word, I just gave him the most blank, vacant, uncaring stare I've ever given anyone in my life. He eventually left me alone.
No Love For Brother
[rebelmouse-image 18349691 is_animated_gif=I was visiting my parents with my dog a few months ago, my brother came into the house and as a normal happy dog would he ran to the door in excitement and is standing about 2 feet away just wagging his tail awaiting the new visitor.
My brother decided he didn't like my dog being at the door and kicked my pup as hard as he could in the stomach. My dog is 180 pounds and I've barely heard him whimper in pain at any point. My dog let out the loudest Yelp and ran to me with his tail tucked whimpering. That's how hard my brother had kicked him.
I'm not a generally angry person and I hardly ever yell and I especially am NOT a fighter. That day my family saw a side of me that they never have. My dad had to physically pull me off of my brother and kicked him out. I believe I said some pretty graphic things about how I was going to kill him. Don't fuck with my dog. Ever.
Nintendo
[rebelmouse-image 18349692 is_animated_gif=My best friend selling my Nintendo for heroin. Not great.
The Drummer
[rebelmouse-image 18349693 is_animated_gif=I had a bandmate (the drummer... always the f*cking drummer) who was always kind of shiftless and self-absorbed but funny and talented, which goes a long way in a band situation. Jim was never on time, serially unapologetic about being an hour late, and was a prima donna about his performances. After a few years of this, I got sick of it and we disbanded.
Fast forward another year, Jim calls me up and tells me he's moving to my city and was wondering if I could give him a job at my construction company. Against my better judgement, I give him a qualified yes. Turns out he was as shitty an employee as he was a bandmate: always late, always texting, futzing around so it took twice as long to do something as it should. Eventually, after numerous attempts to whip him into shape, I let him go.
In the interim, a lot of personal things had happened, including me getting separated/divorced. One day, my ex texts me some screen shots of the conversation Jim initiated. "Hey, girl, just checking on you to make sure you're okay. Breakups are hard. Call me if you need anything..." To her credit, her response was along the lines of, "If I did, I'd probably call somebody else. When was the last time you talked to twelvesteprevenge, anyway?"
He plays drums in a band with other friends of mine but I refuse to go to any of their shows because f*ck you, Jim.
She Could Have Afforded To Repay
[rebelmouse-image 18349694 is_animated_gif=A friend was leaving a crappy relationship, she had a one year old son and was pretty down on her luck. She asked to borrow $2000 for a damage deposit and first months rent and promised to pay me back after her next payday. I was naive and trusted her. In hindsight, I should have known, due to her situation that she wouldn't be able to pay me back that quickly. Anyway, gave her the money and haven't seen a dime of it. What makes it unforgivable for me is that in the 3 years that have passed, she is doing well, bought a brand new car, moved to a nice condo, always has her hair and nails done etc. I feel like if she can afford these things, she could have paid me $50 each pay period or whatever she could, when she could, but obviously paying me back/our friendship is not a priority for her... in fact, whenever I have contacted her about it she just ignores me. Lesson definitely learned, I don't lend anyone money and will teach my children the same. I know not everyone is like my "friend" but it often seems that people who are generous/good natured get taken advantage of.
Attempted Kidnapping
[rebelmouse-image 18349695 is_animated_gif=My 14 yo daughter went through a phase where she became very neglectful in her school attendance and studies so as punishment she was not allowed any tv or music until her homework was done every night -- apparently this was too much for her and she ended up running away -- leaving a note that said "Don't come looking for me because you won't find me. I love you but I just need to get away and find myself. Bye."
I immediately called all her friends in her little phone book -- no one had heard or seen her (this was at 9:00 pm) and as my husband drove around to all her favorite spots to check and see if she was there, I called the police.
They arrived took all the info down, a current picture of her etc. and said they'd issue a BOLO (Be On the Look Out) and bring her home if they spotted her.
I then sat waiting for my husband to return and decided to call my bff, crying hysterically about what had happened.
She listened patiently and gave all the proper sympathetic responses including that if my daughter didn't return by that night (she lived two hours away in another city) she would come in the morning and stay with me to show support and brain storm.
I agreed and we cried together some more and then we ended the conversation.
We didn't sleep all night and jumped out of my skin every time the phone rang. Morning arrived and so did my bff.
She would leave for home at dark and return in tbe morning every day for the almost three weeks our daughter was missing. All along being a rock to me as support. Brain storming, making more calls to other family and friends for me, put her kids on the look out and to spread the word etc..made meals so I didn't have to cook and gave me hugs and her shoulder to cry on, often times crying with me.
Almost three weeks into my daughter being missing the phone rang and it was the police -- talk about a heart attack, especially since they had found the body of a female at a isolated park -- and all they simply said "Mrs. Worry We found her!"
I cried and said "Is she ok?" and I sware I stopped breathing until he answered.
He says "Yes, she's fine. Has a mouth on her and we feel sorry for you, but she's fine. Another PD found her in another county, recognized her from her picture and brought her in. She's here, if you want to come pick her up. We wouldn't blame you if you decided to leave her here, but she is here."
I laughed between tears and said I'd be right down -- coincidently my bff had decided to stay home that day and so I called my husband from work to come home so we could go get our daughter together.
Here's the "shorter" part of this story.
Fast forward after many months of counseling and an actual in patient hospitalization for our daughter she snapped out of it and once again there was peace and joy in our home.
So imagine my surprise when one night as my daughter and I were having our nightly mother/daughter chats while staring at the stars on our deck -- my daughter blurts out , " Mom aren't you curious about the where, who or what of my little excursion?"
I hadn't pushed her for details because I didn't want to stress her and figured I'd hear it from her sooner or later. So I just said "Yes, but only when you're ready. Don't you want to know what and how I felt finding you gone?"
She said yes and so I vented my fears, worries and sleepless nights and made the ending comment of "...had it not been forBFF being a great friend to me I'd have lost it."
My daughter by now was softly weeping at my anguish and said "Mom...she's NOT your friend."
And I said "Why do you say that?"
And my daughter said "Because....I was hiding out at her house all that time. She hid me from you and kept encouraging me not to go home that she had always wanted a daughter like me and I could stay and be her daughter. She evil and mean, she's also jealous of you and likes daddy and told me that she wish she had your looks and money and life. She's NOT your friend. But please don't tell her I told you. She made me promise not to say anything."
I could have fell out of my chair in shock.
The next morning after my daughter went to school, I got in my car and drove the two hours to my bff house. She was shocked to see me (she had been inexplicably absent since our daughter was "returned") and I could see the worry and slight fear in her face but tried to act like nothing was wrong.
She didn't originally invite me in like usual and had a death grip on her door knob so I knew SHE KNEW why I was there.
I said WHAT? You're not going to invite me in now? And she quickly caught herself and said "OH, sorry come on in".
No sooner had we sat down and I let her have it with a tongue lashing she's never had before and I ended it with "You're evil and no friend of mine and I never want to see you EVER again!!! And you better pray to God that I can't prosecute you for kidnapping!!" then I stormed out.
We'd been friends since grade school!
How she could have done that to us is beyond me, and I could have easily beat the crap out of her but chose the high road.
Something that I still regret talking and NOT beating the crap out of her.
I want her to feel the pain she caused me by knowing all along my daughter was at her house while she cried with me and held my hand and SAW THE PAIN I WAS SUFFERING.
A pure sociopath. Ughh.
Stolen Art
[rebelmouse-image 18349697 is_animated_gif=He was an artist and I was a writer. I had a script written out for a graphic novel, he wanted to work on it and I agreed.
He did no work whatsoever for two months. Not a single sketch. Instead, he put his name on my story and took a meeting with a publisher through a contact he had. He told me about it after they let him know they weren't interested and acted like it was no big deal.
Needless to say, I lost my shit. I made him show me all the stuff he showed them. His name, everywhere. His contact info, everywhere. My name was on one page, under his. Everything he showed them was 100% my work, even what sketches there were were from me, and he acted like he did it all.
I told him to f*ck right off, forever.
Don't Bring Missionaries
[rebelmouse-image 18349698 is_animated_gif=I had some friends from church that I thought understood and supported me. I am athiest, and don't even want to discuss religion. They called to see when was a good time to visit me, and I was excited to hear from them. They brought pushy missionaries. I'm still mad about it, and don't reach out to them because of it. At the time I kept the peace, now I regret not saying something because it was just rude.
Cat Food For The Abused
[rebelmouse-image 18349699 is_animated_gif=My mother used to starve me. Like literal abuse. If I was lucky I'd get a quarter of a butter sandwich for lunch and for tea, a dried lump of old cooked pasta that had been defrosted by being left in the counter all day. I used to be so so hungry!
A friends mother took pity on me, I don't know how it came about, but she began sending my friend in with an extra lunch every day in school. It was only a sandwich and a juice but wow, I had food that was nice and filling! I was so thankful and I made it clear that I was.
Then one day, the friend decided it would be funny to put cat food in the sandwiches and give them to me. When I realized what she'd done, she laughed so publicly at me for being such a scrounger.
Obviously it was an amazing thing that that friends parents did for me, I was definitely a scrounger by all means but I was so hungry! I still don't trust others with my food though
That Playlist, Though...
[rebelmouse-image 18348806 is_animated_gif=I had two friends in middle school and we would always hang out. We had a whole friend group and for the first time in my life I felt like I had friends and like I belonged somewhere.
About halfway through ninth grade, my two friends just stopped talking to me and inviting me to stuff. They were shutting me out. So I automatically started thinking it was a problem with me. I racked my brain trying to figure it out. Cried and cried cause I was losing my only friends.
Years later, I talked to one of them about it and asked why they shut me out. He said, "do you really want to know?" Obviously I did. He said it was because of the music I listened to. I listened to Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, AC/DC, all that good stuff. They listened to All American Rejects and We The Kings, etc. I told him that was the dumbest fucking reason and walked away.
I went through agony trying to figure out what I did wrong and it was just what I had on my iPod.
Medical Snooping
[rebelmouse-image 18349700 is_animated_gif=I caught a former friend rifling through correspondence between me and an online Dr.
I went MENTAL.
I was a closeted trans-woman at the time. Im still mostly closeted to this day (but slowly breaking out) - but what gives the prick the right to read letters Iv kept aside in my own home?
The excuse of You've looked depressed for ages and I just wanted to see if there's anything I can do just doesn't cut it. How dare anyone read my mail in the 1st place. Even worse - when it's clearly medically related - to keep going.
Screw him. We don't speak anymore.
H/T: Reddit
Some people typically don't like being told what to do because they think they already know what they're doing.
That is until they stumble and land on their face.
It turns out what they were resistant to accepting in the first place was accurate all along.
If only they listened.
Curious to hear of other people's growing pains, Redditor TinyUnderstanding948 asked:
"What lesson did you have to learn the hard way?"
You can protect yourself with these reminders.
Leave A Paper Trail
"Any monetary or business agreement needs to be in writing!"
– phi316
Observing The Fine Print
"Read the contract."
– BoB_thu_Builder
Generally speaking, business relationships and friendships are mutually exclusive.
Strictly Business
"Not everyone you work with is your friend."
– Cracktower
What Venting Led To
"My grandmother learned that the hard way a few years ago. Had been in the same industry since the 90s, was being paid less than she was worth honestly. On a break at work, she was venting to a coworker she thought she was friends with, about someone who worked in the same place as them."
"Word got back to the boss pretty fast and they used it as an excuse to stop giving her work and forced her out; they preferred a younger workforce that they could pay less. She had to retire without much savings, had to sell her house and move in with my aunt, and now has to live off of social security benefits. She probably would have never retired if she hadn't been forced to; because of her age, she wasn't able to get hired anywhere else."
– Cotton_Kerndy
Pretend Friends
"I work with someone who will laugh with you and pretend to be your buddy but as soon as you turn your back, she's already b*tched about you to 20 people and whined about you asking for her help with some small tasks (even though she offered her support)."
"The worst part is she is part of the HR team and she has a documented history of exploding at people, harassment and bullying, and not doing her job (because she spends most of her time crying and complaining). She is the stereotypical HR representative."
– Cole__MacGrath__
Consumers who were previously taken advantage of have the following advice to pass along.
Splurge On Good Quality
"Buy it nice or buy it twice."
– BlackFlorida
Caveat Emptor
"This is 100% accurate but needs a disclaimer: expensive does not always equate to nice."
– bumstopper
The relationships we have with people are complex, but you may want to keep these in mind.
Extending A Lifeline
"You can’t always help people. You can show them you care and point them toward help, but it’s up to them to get better. And if you fail, it’s not your fault."
– AerobaticDiamond
Don't Settle
"You can't have a relationship with someone's potential."
– comeawaywithmee
Achieve Mutual Adoration
"Loving someone doesn't mean they will keep loving you."
– mrenglish22
And when it comes to your health, listen up.
Hydrate
"Drink plenty of water."
"It's hard to know when you're dehydrated sometimes. Felt terrible and didn't know why. Never felt thirsty. Had skin issues, lack of sleep, irritability, lack of concentration, dizzy spells, could not function at work, among other things."
"Ended up at the ICU with an IV drip for severe dehydration."
"DRINK YOUR WATER!"
– bebarrucha
While advice from the people we care about comes from a good place, they are not always appreciated.
Sometimes, we have to make our own mistakes in order to fully comprehend why we should apply certain standards to the way we go about our lives.
At least for me, I've found that picking myself up and dusting myself off was most effective.
As patients, we rely on the expertise of medical professionals to be able to identify whatever ailments we're suffering through.
We brace ourselves if we fear the worst, but oftentimes, we end up being comforted by a minor diagnosis.
But all the medical degrees and years of education can't teach doctors to practice empathetic, yet professional, doctor-to-patient interaction on a basic human level.
That has to come naturally.
Curious to hear from patients who have had disappointing or distressing interactions with their physicians, Redditor TheSpasticSheep asked:
"What’s the most out of line thing a doctor has every said to you?"

It's horrifying when even doctors don't have a clue about your condition and, even worse, they gaslight you.
Dismissed Diagnosis
"A gentleman I worked with showed up to work one day looking extremely sick. He was incredibly feverish, had muscle and joint aches, very lethargic and was looking very jaundiced."
"we insisted that he go to the doctor, as he looks like he is on deaths door. He told us that he had been to 2 separate doctors and the ER, letting them know that he has Malaria, and can they please give him some anti malarials. Both doctors and the ER insisted that it 'was impossible to have malaria, as Australia doesn't have malaria,' and that he probably just had the flu, or some other viral infection. And they are correct. We don't have malaria here. But, what they failed to grasp was that this gentleman was an expat who worked in Africa for a number of years, and has had malaria 5 times already. So not only is he an expert in what malaria 'feels' like, but he is also at risk of developing malaria again, even if he hasn't been to Africa in a few years."
"He ended up having to go back to the ER, and basically force them to run a test for Malaria, after which they were like 'oh wow, you do have malaria.' And he was like 'no sh*t, i told you that 2 days ago.'"
– PanzerBiscuit
Not Going Mental
"I had smashed my face on my steering wheel during a bad car accident and was experiencing intense pain. I teared up when he put the scope in my nose and was told I obviously have psychological problems and if I went on medication it might not help my pain, but I wouldn't care as much."
"Finally found a good doctor and surgery removed the chunk of nose bone that was stabbing into a nerve in my face."
– coldbloodedjelydonut
The wrong treatment after a misdiagnosis can be a doctor's serious mistake.
Almost Scalped
"I had a growth on my scalp a few years ago and went to see a skin cancer specialist. Who said it was a malenoma and I was going to need most of my scalp removed. Without even having a biopsy. He starts telling me to prepare myself for this surgery that will disfigure me. I was about 19 at the time with long hair. He started saying ill need to wear a wig and my hair may not grow back and the skin above my eyes will need to be removed."
"I was petrified. Went home in tears and absolutely petrified."
"Then my dad took me to his doctor, who took a biopsy."
"It was just a random skin growth and she cut it off then and there."
"Far out."
– catsandalcohol13
Wrong Medication
"Years ago, one of the sexual health nurses at my work told me she just saw a woman who very clearly had a scabies infestation around her genitals. She said the treatment was simple and that a cream was applied with almost instant relief. She said what upset her about that patient was that almost a year earlier she’d been to a doctor about the infestation, the doctor didn’t even inspect her and just prescribed her antidepressants. I was horrified and still am over 7 years later. So much medical gaslighting."
– syberburns
"Too Young" For Cancer
"Not one, but two doctors to my dad- 'you’re too young to have prostate cancer, no need for a biopsy, it’s just a bladder problem.'”
"He died 15 months later from an aggressive prostate cancer that spread to create tumors all over his body."
– OHManda30
The "Sad" Pill
""While teaching abroad in Vietnam I was struggling with depression. The doc diagnosed me with homesickness and prescribed a box of 160 hydrocodone to take 'when I feel sad.'"
"I was 21 and this was 2007, way before pill use was talked about mainstream. Subsequent boxes were $12 each at a walk up pharmacy, no script needed. I became addicted for 6 years."
"Edit, as I have many people stating that pill use has been discussed forever: I’m talking about the point we got to where most people knew about the dangers of opioids, what the main ones were, the fact that they were being overprescribed etc. Had I heard the word hydrocodone and been exposed to the world and media like I have over the last decade with the spotlight on the opioid crisis, I would never have taken them. That’s the main point I was attempting to make."
– dogislove99
It's even more unsettling when someone you entrust your life to crosses a line.
Assessment Or Pick-Up Line?
"Mental health doctor told my daughter, 'You're too pretty to be depressed.'"
– geeleedickert
A NSFW Observation
"Not a doctor, but a dentist. When I was like 13 or 14 he commented on my lack of gag reflex, telling me that I’m going to be 'very popular with the boys.' It took me a few years to realize what he meant by that."
– goldmarigold
Mom To The Rescue
"I was the opposite. My dentist said, 'If you always gag like that, you're never going to find a good husband!'"
"I didn't understand why my mom yanked me out of the dentist's chair, but I'm proud of her for that. I think I was 6 or 7 years old."
– NeedsMoreTuba
The Gynocologist's Love Advice
"Mentioned that my sex drive was abnormally low to my gyno, and she said my husband just needed to be more forceful when initiating and I’d get into it. Immediately switched doctors and never looked back!"
– SpinningBetweenStars
The Gyno Who Jumped To Conclusions
"Mine was the opposite. Moved and went to a new gyno that several women raved about. I expressed concern over my low sex drive (especially since I was only 25). The next thing I know she is giving speeches and pamphlets and trying to give me info on women’s shelters. I was so confused."
"She just jumped to the conclusion I must be a battered woman. No matter what I said, she was convinced I was being abused. I tried to reassure her no, my husband was definitely NOT the problem and he was actually quite good in bed and extremely attentive to my needs. It was clearly a physical problem."
"Never went back. She even called several times to 'check' on me. I get that some women may need this, but I mean there was literally no red flags, quite the opposite. It was weird."
– Drachenfuer
Going to the doctor's office for any reason can cause a lot of anxiety.
Patients should never have their stresses exacerbated by an unqualified doctor giving them a false analysis or downplaying their concerns.
Hopefully, you're in good hands with a physician who is professional, as well as compassionate.
Growing up, I had zero idea that the food I ate daily was "cultural."
It didn't occur to me until I was a kid when my mother had to gently explain to me that not everyone ate rice & beans.
She had to explain it because we were about to eat at a white friend's house for the first time.
I've always been weird about food tastes and textures and mom needed to warn me that the beans I could expect would be nothing like what I knew.
They would be sweet, have big chunks of chewy pork (which would also be sweet), and would NOT be served with rice.
"What do you mean there's no rice with the beans? Did they run out? Should we bring some?"
"No, they just don't eat rice and beans."
"So what do they eat with their chicharron de pollo?"
"They don't eat that. They do fried chicken a little different and they tend to eat things like rotisserie chicken instead."
Y'all should have seen my face.
It's been thirty years and I still struggle with the idea of not eating rice and beans all the time. I've come to understand that not everyone grew up in a Caribbean cultural household, though, and most Americans ate from a whole other menu.
Reddit user remyleboi00 asked:
"Non-Americans, what is the best 'American' food?"
Even as someone born in America, it took a while before I got familiar with American food.
So if it's just not your comfort zone - let Reddit guide you to the can't miss dishes.
Cajun
"Cajun food. Definitely the most unique American food"
- Excision
"As an American I 100% agree with you. Cajun food is heaven sent"
- Chaoticqueen19
"That's because of it's native American roots, fun fact Cajun peppers are named after the south American tribe that influenced the Spanish/French who brought it to Louisiana. Maque Choux is also a very native American dish that can be found in Mexico as Calabasitas."
- Objective_Lion196
They Are Fun
"Curly fries 👌"
"Recently came across Carl’s jr for the first time in Istanbul airport and the curly fries were just the best"
- av_jet
"Absolutely!"
- GrandpasMormonBooks
"the fun thing about curly fries is that they are basically the same everywhere. I'm pretty sure it's one company supplying all the different fast food places"
- siccanimelord69
M.A.C.
"I hate to sound like an ignorant foreigner but a made from scratch Mac & Cheese with at least 3 different cheeses plus a crispy breadcrumb crust on top is one of my favorite American dishes"
- Mona_Moans
"Mac & Cheese is such a favorite of family get-togethers that if you volunteer to cook it, your Mac & Cheese needs references."
"It’s especially good with some pulled pork and caramelized onions mixed in. And some insulin."
- GetZePopcorn
"Solid choice. We Americans LOVE cheese."
- RyGuyStrong
"No need to apologize. One of our favorites too."
- sexysmartsingle
Thankful For Thanksgiving.
"I'm from Mexico and we get spoiled with our traditional cuisine but I found the thanksgiving dinner experience in the US incredible."
"Love everything, the turkey (dark meat :) ), cranberry sauce, the stuffing (oh the stuffing), mashed potatoes, salads and the delicious pays that follow for dessert. That whole combination plus the red wine and good company is an incredible experience hard to match."
- i5rider
"We also get spoiled with your traditional cuisine."
- Pharaon4
"I usually get a food coma on Thanksgiving"
- FrenchiesRule
"As an American who loves the Thanksgiving and other holiday classics this warms my heart to hear from someone whose cultural cuisine is considered a full on cultural heritage of humanity by UNESCO."
"A nicely done, quality turkey with proper attention paid to all the sides, and good friends and/family is such a great experience."
"Same with the ham or prime rib dinner at Christmas. And all the pies. God I love pumpkin pie."
- RedCascadian
Smokey Deliciousness
"Anything smoked: brisket, pork shoulder, chicken, turkey. I've even had smoked burgers. If seasoned well you don't even need BBQ sauce and it is so tender and juicy."
- stickiestofickies
"I smoke meatloaf, can't go back to oven baked ever again."
- JohnnyBrillcream
"This tread has me wanting to smoke a brisket sooner rather than later."
- firemage22
"I love smoked brisket. I agree with you about the sauce. Taste the brisket before dunking in another flavor."
- Sourbreaker
"Native Texan here. Agreed. The general rule here is that you never sauce beef. Let the flavor of the meat stand for itself. Hell, there are some places in Texas (particularly in Lockhart) that will ask you to leave their establishment if you ask for BBQ sauce."
"Now, pork and chicken, whatever else... Go nuts... Just leave beef alone."
- IAmTheZechariah
"I had smoked mac and cheese once, it was heavenly."
- RecursiveBob
Risk It All
"This is probably a recipe for disaster but I'm British and growing up visiting Florida I would love eating raw cookie dough from the refrigerator section"
- Blocker212
"Cookie dough is so good that, given the option between not eating it, or getting food poisoning, nearly everyone will pick the cookie dough."
"It’s one of the few foods in the country where everyone knows the risk of food poisoning, and everyone makes the conscious, willing, and eager decision to not give a f*ck."
- duckbill_principate
"All of us here in the U.S. know that eating the cookie dough is the best part of making homemade chocolate chip cookies. I have a recipe for brownies with a cookie dough topping. Cookie dough ice cream is also extremely common (it’s vanilla ice cream with cookie dough bits mixed in)."
- Idontcheckmyemail
The Holy Pudding
"I can’t find someone who’s listed it so"
"BANANA PUDDING"
"That shit is LIFE CHANGING"
- Madmagican-
"Gotta have the Nilla wafers or it isn't right."
- zekeweasel
"Ah, finally! A person of culture. Banana pudding is the closest food can come to a religious experience."
- timmeh4853
Cornbread!
"Oddly enough, no one seems to have mentioned it…but cornbread . Yeah , as a guy who moved here , Americans have got cornbread down to a T . Combined with some soul food ? Makes me smile on the inside . Gives me high blood pressure , but smile on the inside too"
- Thatmixedotaku
"A nice warm cornbread muffin with some butter and a little drizzle of honey is amazing."
- AvatarJack
"Cornbread with a nice bowl of chili is such a nice comfort food."
"And the spicier the chili the nicer the sweet, buttery cornbread is with it."
- WingedLady
A Classic
"Peanut butter and jelly sandwich, at first i thought it was a disgusting combo, but when i tried i loved it"
- ilovepotatoesalott
"Interesting, most people in America are introduced to pb&j before we're even old enough to remember"
- Clear_Impact2025
"Farmer’s market jam is the way."
- ubiquitous-joe
"That was my most frequent meal in elementary school. I didn't realize it was an American thing until recently."
- Robbie_the_Brave
"It's easily top 3 greatest sandwich ever."
- The_Exquisite
As American As It Gets
"I may be a simpleton, but an average diner with bottomless filter coffee, pancakes, bacon and syrup was my favourite part of the day. Although I did put on about 10-15kg after a month in Texas"
- BasedEvidence
"I missed this sooooo much when I lived in the UK (grew up in New Jersey, land of diners). They simply do not do American diner breakfasts in Europe."
- landshanties
"My wife is German, I am American but we live in Germany. We took her parents to the states with us one summer on vacation and one of the things they insisted we do was go to a diner where they pour your coffee at the table, like in movies and tv shows."
"Took them to my favorite little spot, they loved the waitress filling up their cups unprompted."
- the-real-truthtron
Now that youve heard Reddit, it's my turn.
So remember how I said that I wasn't really exposed to American food until I was a bit older, even though I was born and raised in America?
I was 22 before I had meatloaf and mashed potatoes.
FAM. Fam. Faaaaaaaaaaam.
There is no greater meal for after a night of drinking than a good meatloaf and a nice herb and garlic mashed potato.
Keep your greasy pizza, amateurs. It's potato time over here.
Have you ever been caught in a conversation you didn't want to be in? Or start talking to someone only to realize you want to stop? Perhaps you were talking to a friend when the conversation took a turn for the uncomfortable.
Whatever the case, we've all been in those situations where we want the conversation to stop, but don't want to be rude.
When I was in third grade, I asked if I voted on American Idol that week. I said yes, since everyone seemed to, but of course I didn't know what American Idol was. Being pop culture challenged, I thought it was a ship. Needless to say everyone was confused when I was asked who I voted for and I replied, "What do you mean? I voted for American Idol!"
It didn't take me long to realize something was amiss, and I probably would've very rudely excused myself from the conversation (fueled by my embarrassment) if my teacher hadn't called us to attention at that very moment.
Luckily, the people of Reddit were willing to share their methods to politely end a conversation when Redditor Spritti33asked:
"How does someone politely end a conversation with a person who won't stop talking?"
Extricate Yourself Immediately
"When they draw a breath, politely say:"
""On that note, I must be on my way.""
Then, simply leave."
– Back2Bach
Couldn't Get Him To Shut Up
"Yea I worked with a dude who needed to talk. I just talked to him to be polite and not awkward. And I remember him saying "at least you're not one of those people who are silent all day". In my head I'm like, "FUCK, I wish I could be silent all day but now that you said that it would be even more awkward."
"At some point, I just mentally said f**k it and started giving him one-word replies. I think he got the hint because he started talking to me less. Eventually, he quit after a couple of months so it's all good!"
"But some people just need to talk for whatever reason. I need my freaking silence."
– BlackSecurity
Put It In Writing
"I once worked with a man that managed to say nothing, despite talking nonstop. He would explain an issue to me over the span of 5 min. I would say "OK, so the issue you're having is x?" and he would say "No" then launch into a 5 min monologue about something completely different. One time, after half an hour talking with him I still had no idea what the problem was, so I said "put all the issues in an email so I can put it in the queue" and just left. Never got a coherent email either but at least a rambling incoherent email is easier to walk away from and less time-consuming."
– TechnologyFetish
Put Them (Back) To Work
"If you're in an office building with someone (or any location the person you're talking to has a desk), one trick you can try is walking them back to their desk, say something like "well, I'll let you get back to it!", then turn around and leave."
– RegulusMagnus
Taking Care Of Each Other
"My workplace has someone like this and it’s pretty much become a part of our culture to monitor who is trapped talking to her, for how long they’ve been stuck, and to rescue them after an appropriate amount of time has passed. She doesn’t get it, and probably never will."
– Lady_DreadStar
Talk To The Door
"My husband worked with a woman who would not stop talking. Just wouldn't. So you'd gather your stuff, while she monologued. You'd say goodbye to everyone else, while she monologued. You'd walk to the door as she followed you and shut the door in her face while she monologued. You could hear her still talking to you behind the closed door while you walked away."
– BoozeIsTherapyRight
Take Your Turn
"I learned a trick. Most excessive talkers hate listening. So I simply participate and tell my own stories. After one or two stories they are usually ready to leave themselves to seek their next victim."
– RireBaton
Create A Deadline
"My entire dad's side of the family are the type that never stop talking."
"The key to getting a word in is to just respond to whatever you wanted to add to even if they are still talking. It might feel rude but most people who are like that were raised in environments where that's the norm or in the case of people with disorders like ADHD and Autism, they most likely know they have the tendency and will roll with it."
"Best way I've found to get end a conversation with ramblers is to set a deadline as early as possible in the conversation (ex: I have to leave at 6pm to get to ______ on time). If you do this you can do the "I'm sorry I really have to go" and immediately leave without offending them because you've already set the expectation that you would be leaving at a certain time."
– aflyingcowpie
Music
"This is why I hate taking Lyft/Uber alone, I seem to always get the folks who just want to talk the entire time. My boyfriend tells me to just not engage but when you’re in a car with someone it’s kinda hard not to. The ONE time I just wore headphones the whole time, the driver at the end said “maybe you’ll actually talk next time”"
– sm0gs
"Headphones..."
– bob_marley98
No Need To Feel Bad
"People who are like this expect folks to just walk away from them while they are talking because that’s the only way the conversation ends. It’s not rude to them, it’s normal. So, it’s entirely okay to say, “all right this has been great, see you later,” and then just walk away smiling."
– paulpowell9
Sometimes it's hard to get out of a conversation you never wanted to be in, and sometimes it's equally as hard to keep your temper in check.
However, if you remember some of these tips and tricks, you may be able to successfully get yourself out of an unpleasant or unceremoniously long conversation in the future!