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Firefighters have ha super stressful, often very dangerous job. They save us from terrifying situations, and many find it to be quite a rewarding career. It's a little less rewarding when they're having to save us from our own stupidity, though.


Reddit user u/AnAverageGuy10 asked:

"Firefighters of reddit, what's the stupidest way a person has started a fire?"

10.

We had a lady drying her Victoria secret panties by hanging them on top of her bathroom door and turning the ceiling heating lamp on. Panties caught fire and burned part of the door up. Funny thing is she didn't even know it happened. She called because she smelled smoke, our LT found the culprit... she was pretty embarrassed.

-ExtraGuac1

9.

I was a leasing agent in Las Vegas and the red Cross contacted us about an emergency placement of a family. Turns out there 16 year old daughter had burned down the house after trying to kill a black widow with the hairspray and lighter flamethrower trick.... The father had this look of oh dear God my daughter is stupid as the story was told to us in the leasing office.

-prw8201

8.

When I was maybe 18 I was living at the local volunteer fire station and all the other young guys needed to find ways to pass the time. As we are want to do in a rural town with lots of energy and little oversight we decided to be creative with our fun.

We head out to the side of the fire department and one of my buddies has a tennis ball that we just start kicking around. After a little bit another friend said he learned a cool trick at work and pulled out a can of degreaser. He coated the ball in degreaser and lit it on fire. Now we are kicking a flaming ball around that left little flaming drops on the ground after it bounced and may burn us if it hits. So obviously we are in heaven.

We kick the ball around a few times before one of us realizes that we are about 30 ft away from our above ground fuel tank - you know the multi hundred gallon tank we use to fill our equipment up with! We realize exactly how lucky we were to not blow ourselves up, put the ball out, and go inside without telling others there exactly how stupid we had just been. Sorry the fire was only the tennis ball, but I figured it was still in the spirit of the question.

-TheWerdOfRa

7.

Guy had bedbugs in his home. He read somewhere online if you raise the temperature in your home to a certain point the bedbugs can't survive.

This was sound advice. After he lit the portable propane heater and shut the door to his bedroom , the resulting fire killed all the bedbugs.

-itscomingnomatterwht

6.

Rolled up to a three-plex row of two-story townhomes. The unit in the middle was blowing and going. By the time we put the fire out, there was a huge vee pattern on the back side of the complex, meaning you could see where the fire started at about waist level near the rear wall because everything above it was burned away upwards and outwards. Just completely cratered and gone in a vee all the way up to the (now mostly missing) roof.

Turns out the genius in the middle unit was trying to start his charcoal BBQ grill. Unfortunately, he didn't have any starter fluid, so he got the fantastic idea to use gasoline instead. Alas, the coals didn't completely catch the first time he lit them off, so he decided to pour on more gasoline. OUT OF THE GLASS JAR HE WAS USING TO STORE IT IN. A spark in the coals leapt up the pouring gas into the jar. Said genius panicked and threw the jar. Directly at the wall of his townhome. Where it exploded.

Dipsh*t Molotov cocktailed his own home.

When we rolled up our hoses and went back in service, leaving the scene in the capable hands of the investigators, the neighbors from either side were angrily and animatedly grouped up on the sidewalk out front, waiting for Captain Dumb*ss to return from the walk he had suddenly decided he needed to go on to "clear his head."

-hellkitty-

5.

Had a guy last year that was driving down the highway while smoking. He went to flick the butt out the window, but it flew into his back seat where it started some crap back there on fire. Instead of pulling over this dumbass takes off his shorts and tries to put the fire out with them, while still driving at highway speeds. It didn't go so well as he slid off the highway. FD showed up to this moron with his car burning and him standing there in his underwear.

-zcubed

4.

Coldest day of the year. -8, plus wind chill. Guy was trying to thaw a frozen water pipe in the basement, using a BLOW TORCH. Caught the wall on fire. Did NOT call 911 until the entire basement was on fire. Our chief was in the fire station, 1 1/2 blocks away, and by the time he was on-scene, the first floor was burning. Spent 5 hours in the freezing cold, putting it out.

I was on an attack line, kneeling on the sidewalk and spraying water into a second-floor window. Mist was blowing back onto me from the water stream. Eventually, another firefighter relieved me so I could go to the Rehab tent.

I couldn't get up- I was frozen to the ground, and my arms had a layer of ice on them so I couldn't bend them.
We were still fighting it when the insurance adjuster arrived. Our assistant chief said, "So, do you know what started this fire?"

The guy replied, "Yeah, but we insure for stupidity."

-PhantomScarecrow

3.

Not a firefighter, but when I was dorming my freshmen year of college, I got a call on Valentine's Day saying that my room was on fire and my bed/a bunch of my stuff had burned down. The night before my roommate borrowed my makeup mirror, left it on my desk, and then went home. I had already left for the weekend. When the sun rose the next morning, it reflected off the mirror and right onto my bed causing it to start smoking. Pretty stupid way to start a fire but luckily it got put out pretty quick. Took a week or two for the smell to air out which kinda sucked.

-tonifay

2.

A dude got wasted drunk, put a pot full of water on to boil so he could make some corn. Falls asleep, water boils off and starts heating up this pot. Smoke begins to fill the apartment building, smoke detectors going off and everyone else is evacuated by the time we get there.

Except drunky mcdrunkerson. He's still passed out inside his apt and won't answer his locked door. That's ok, firefighters love breaching doors and generally "f---ing stuff up. We make forced entry and he's sleeping away on his couch while the smoke alarms scream.

He was able to walk out of the apt (hunched under the worst of the smoke) and everyone was fine.

-Kahn33

1.

Late to the party here, but last year right before Christmas, we had a structure fire that was started by the homeowner burning his 55 gallon drum of random wood cuttings and pieces from various tree trimmings under his "home engineered" carport. Now, to paint the picture a little, this carport is every bit of MAYBE 6 feet high. And made of nothing but plywood and 2x4s. He then used decking screws to secure it to his mobile home.

So, he lights up his burn barrel, under his carport, because it's kinda misty out and he doesn't want to stand in it. The flames from the CEDAR he was burning in his barrel reached probably 15 feet high and caught his carport on fire, which in turn, caught his car, his wife's car, and his mobile home on fire.

He's on the far outskirts of our district, so by the time we roll up, his cars are fully involved, with about half of his house rolling.

Luckily for his kids, we were able to get in and save all of their Christmas gifts from under the tree. Seeing their faces after we brought out their presents is a memory I'll never forget.

All because he HAD TO BURN HIS WOOD BARREL THAT DAY.

-makeshifted

Image by Clker-Free-Vector-Images from Pixabay

Have you ever been reading a book, watching a movie, or even sitting down for a fantastical cartoon and began to salivate when the characters dig into some doozy of a made up food?

You're not alone.

Food is apparently fertile ground for creativity. Authors, movie directors, and animators all can't help but put a little extra time and effort into the process of making characters' tasty delights mouthwatering even for audiences on the other side of the screen.

Read on for a perfect mixture of nostalgia and hunger.

AllWhammyNoMorals asked, "What's a fictional food you've always wanted to try?"

Some people were all about the magical foods eaten in the magical places. They couldn't help but wish they could bite into something with fantastical properties and unearthly deliciousness.

Nutritious

"Enchanted golden apple" -- DabbingIsSo2015

"The Minecraft eating sounds make me hungry" -- FishingHobo

"Gotta love that health regeneration" -- r2celjazz

"Pretty sure those are based off the golden apples that grant immortality. Norse mythology I think?" -- Raven_of_Blades

Take Your Pick

"Nearly any food from Charlie and the Chocolate factory" -- CrimsonFox100

"Came here to say snozzberries!" -- Utah_Writer

"Everlasting Gobstoppers #1, but also when they're free to roam near the chocolate river and the entire environment is edible." -- devo9er

Peak Efficiency

"Lembas" -- Roxwords

"The one that fills you with just a bite? My fat a** would be making sandwiches with two lembas breads and putting bacon, avocado and cheese inside. Then probably go for some dessert afterwards. No wonder why those elves are all skinny, eating just one measly bite of this stuff." -- sushister

Some people got stuck on the foods they saw in the cartoons they watched growing up. The vibrant colors, the artistic sounds, and the exaggerated movements all come together to form some good-looking fake grub.

The One and Only

"Krabby patty 🍔" -- Cat_xox

"And a kelp shake" -- titsclitsntennerbits

"As a kid I always pretended burgers from McDonalds were Krabby Patties, heck from time to time I still do for the nostalgia of it all. Many of my friends did the same thing." -- Thisissuchadragtodo

Cheeeeeeeeese

"The pizza from an extremely goofy movie. The stringy cheese just looked magical lol" -- ES_Verified

"The pizza in the old TMNT cartoon as well." -- gate_of_steiner85

"Only bested by the pizza from All Dogs Go to Heaven." -- Purdaddy

Get a Big Old Chunk

"Those giant turkey drumsticks in old cartoons that characters would tear huge chunks out of. Those things looked amazing, turkey drumsticks in real life suck and are annoying to eat."

-- Ozwaldo

Slurp, Slurp, Slurp

"Every bowl of ramen on any anime, ever." -- Cat_xox

"Studio Ghibli eggs and bacon" -- DrManhattan_DDM

"Honestly, any food in anime. I swear to god half the budget no matter what the studio goes into making the food look absolutely delicious." -- Viridun

Finally, some highlighted the things that aren't quite so far-fetched, but still far enough away that it's nothing we'll be eating anytime soon.

That tease can be enough to make your mouth water.

What's In It??

"Butter beer" -- Damn_Dog_Inappropes

"came here to say this. i was pretty disappointed with the universal studio version which was over the top sweet. it was more of a butterscotch root beer. i imagine butter beer to be something more like butter and beer, which wouldn't be crazy sweet, but would have a very deep rich flavor" -- crazyskiingsloth

Slice of the Future

"The microwave pizzas in back to the future two" -- biggiemick91

"I've been fascinated with those for years! They just look so good!" -- skoros

As Sweet As They Had

"The Turkish Delight from Lion Witch & Wardrobe. The real ones I had weren't bad but nothing special." -- spoon_shaped_spoon

"Came here to say this. I know it's a real thing, but I always imagined that it must have been amazing to betray your siblings over." -- la_yes

"You're used to freely available too sweet sweets. For a WW2 era schoolkid, it would have represented all the sweets for an entire year." -- ResponsibleLimeade



Here's hoping you made it through the list without going into kitchen for some snack you didn't actually need.

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