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EMS Workers Share The Most Avoidable Deaths They've Ever Witnessed

It isn't always our time.

Life is short and death is inevitable, two rules to live by. We're often told when it's your time, it's your time, so don't be scared but... what if we could hold off on that expiration date by just being smarter and healthier? EMS workers see death and tragedy all of the time and they admit, a significant amount of pain is highly avoidable just by realizing human error.

Redditor u/WapitiTal wanted to hear from some of our medical heroes who are hard at it in the field by asking.... EMS workers of reddit, what's the most avoidable death you've ever seen?


Slippery when Wet.

Giphy

Not completely sure if I'm interpreting this right but people who take off their medical alarm (well known brand life alert) to shower. It seems like half the dead bodies I go on have a medical alarm but they took it off and slipped in the shower or while getting out. Those things are usually water resistant and that's an extremely common place to slip and fall. thereWasAnAttempt42

Drive Smart. 

Probably anytime someone could have worn a seat belt but didn't. itfosho

Totaled my car a couple weeks ago. Without my seatbelt I would've gone through the windshield. As it was, I hit the airbag hard enough to pop it and spiderweb out the windshield in front of the wheel.

All in all, I got out with a couple friction burns on the inside of my forearms. Everything on the passenger side was shoved back about a foot or so.

Ps. State Farm "Emergency" Roadside Assistance was over 4 hours late to dispatch a driver, even after I called, cancelled with the automated system AND a phone operator. G_E_I_R_A_V_O_R

Take your Health Seriously. 

When patients don't take their medicine. Lots of type 2 diabetics don't take their Metformin or change their diet/exercise simply out of denial or they are too set in their ways. End up with bad kidney failure or heart problems.

Additionally, had a patient who refused to take their medicine for their high blood pressure. No reason, just refused. Ended up with a brain bleed on his brain stem, was a quadripeligic, on a ventilator, could not speak, move, or breathe on his own.... he was in his 30s.

Take your medicine people. shocked_caribou

Smoke Away. 

As an ER MD:

Me: Sir, you are having a heart attack. The cardiologist will be here shortly, and we will be taking you to the cath lab as soon as we can.

Patient: I'm going outside to smoke.

Patient rips off ecg leads and defib pads. Walks out despite warnings from myself and others.

EMS Radio (15mins later): XXX year old male cardiac arrest. CPR in progress. AndyEMD

Don't Wait!

Giphy

It's hard to narrow it down to a specific one but I assure you it involves family that said "we just wanted to wait and see what happened." medic8388

Broken Bones. 

I used to be an ambulance officer and on the job it was suicides. I had a guy slash his forearms with a knife then realize he didn't want to go through with it... we got half way to the hospital roughly before he checked out. The most avoidable death I've seen was my grandmother though she went to hospital with a broken wrist. She then developed a Staph infection which meant a couple of days stay supposedly, the orderlies then dropped her while moving beds and broke her hip which then lead to her getting pneumonia and her subsequent death. From a healthy 69 year old woman with a broken wrist to dead in a bit over a week. tungstenfish

The  Simple Bleed? 

Guy had a simple rectal bleed (eg fissure or tear in colon or intestine, blood comes out the anus). He got out of bed and tried to clean it up in the bathroom. That didn't help so he sat on the toilet and tried to stop it. That didn't help and it was getting messy so he went had a shower. Still didn't help so he went out into the bathroom and at that point, probably weak, he sat down in the ground and tried to wipe it up with toilet paper.

We found him dead, stiff with rigor mortis the next morning. Cell phone on the bathroom counter.

It was all pretty obvious from the trail of blood and bloody hand stains on the doorknobs, mirror, walls, toilet, shower knobs, floor... everywhere.

Folks, if you are bleeding a lot out of your butt, there is nothing you can do to stop it and your priority isn't cleaning it up. It's embarrassing but isn't worth dying over. Pjpjpjpjpj

In times of War. 

I was an Army combat medic (EMT-B). The worst completely avoidable death was when we got a call that an Afghan soldier nearby was having chest pains, and their own medic was really concerned about it, so they sent him to our base.

On the drive over, their convoy had to stop suddenly. One of the guys riding in the back of a pickup truck fell off the back because he wasn't wearing any kind of seatbelt or harness. He probably would have been okay, but the truck behind them wasn't able to stop as quickly, so he got caught between the two. He probably would have survived, but he wasn't wearing his helmet either. His skull popped like a grape.

Of course, in my opinion, 100% of the deaths I saw were completely avoidable. Especially because after nearly two decades of war, the US military pulled out and the Taliban immediately retook the area. Men, women, children, and my brothers died for nothing.

Oh, by the way, the chest pain guy was completely fine. There was absolutely nothing wrong with him. Lovebot_AI

Sobriety First. 

Drunk drivers. Way to many drunk drivers and the poor souls unlucky enough to be in their path. andrewdmc

Drunk driver killed my first husband. Drunk drivers are scum. So avoidable. I don't understand how people who rack up multiple DWI's aren't in prison. NiDonnaNaiz

Leave the Stickies!

Giphy

Person in the hospital kept taking their EKG leads off because they didn't like the stickers on their chest. They kept doing this after being warned.

Had a heart attack and didn't get found until they couldn't be saved. Keep your damn leads on people. Bird_of_the_Word

Save your Blood! 

I had a 32M admitted for multiple pulmonary embolisms, turns out this was his second admission within 2 months because he stopped taking his anti-coagulant that was prescribed during his previous admission. His reasoning? They didn't feel like they were doing anything so he stopped taking them. Due to this, he was then started on a different anti-coagulant that requires weekly blood tests, so instead of just taking a pill with little follow-up he had to live with weekly blood tests and a higher risk medication! toolate4ogusername

Can you Hear Me Know?

Not answering the phone is common, family will call for a welfare check. Sometimes a family member comes to visit. Old people also do this in assisted living and nursing homes but in my experience those rarely result in death. thereWasAnAttempt42

Nothing is Obvious.

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Obvious answer would be all of the overdoses but also many incidents in nursing homes, where a patient will be found dead and the staff state "they just saw them 30 minutes ago" when that is definitely not the case.

The worse is a parent rolling onto their baby while asleep, I haven't had that call yet but other crews did recently and it is just devastating to all involved... family, medics, police, fire.... everyone. FuzzyMeep7

Never Go Back! 

Was an EMT, but this was prior to that when I was just a Volunteer Firefighter... got called to a house fire when a grandmother had woken up her grand daughter and got safely out of the house. Unfortunately she decided to go back into the house and died of smoke inhalation mere feet from the door. Since it was a ways out in the county by the time we got there, the house was fully involved, meaning we couldn't go in had to fight the fire back to get through the door. Moral of the story, don't go back into a building in fire where everyone is out safe, things can be replaced but you can't. moderndaygypsy13

Unlucky.

Guy stationed on a coast guard ship got hit in the head by a crane when it fell over. The crane operator didn't put down the outriggers (the big metal feet that stick out to stabilize the crane) and it fell over. Victim was in the wrong place at the wrong time, left behind four daughters and a wife. SpyingForTheNSA

Jackhammer. 

Dude caused massive internal bleeding from using a jack hammer incorrectly. By the time his wife called 911, he was all but dead, and had filled several small trashcans with blood he had vomited.

Big guy too. Had to use firemen and the sling to get him down the stairs. The whole time we were working on him and getting him down the stairs, his wife was nagging him about not hiring someone to break up the pavement, that he was such an idiot for trying to do it himself. She didn't know these were the last words he'd hear from her. nitewake

Too Much To Bare...

Not an EMS but my friend died of AIDS because he "got tired of" taking his medication. He was born with it and was always a little crazy in an offbeat kinda way. Our friend group never knew he was sick until he got hospitalized. Even then, we didn't know anything but he had pneumonia. When I went to see him his spine was visible and he kept telling us how they'd give him anything for pain, whenever he asked, which we all laughed at. He died a month later, laughing til the last day. He expressed regret at having stopped his drugs. His girlfriend, who he'd infected, was devastated as they'd just had twins. He had watched his mom die from it. Completely avoidable death. SexceptableIncredibl

I Know THAT Look! 

I've posted this before but I once had a patient who had "the look" of someone with one foot in the grave who had near complete blockages in all three of the main blood vessels that supply the heart. That's not super unusual, and with open heart surgery she probably had an excellent chance of a good outcome. What was different about this case was she had apparently she'd had the same thing happen (to slightly less degrees) not once, not twice, but THREE times over the previous six months and had refused surgery each time in favor of a Mediterranean diet.

She decompensated very quickly, was immediately sedated and intubated, and flown out to the big city hospital for the surgery she should have received six months ago. I'm pretty sure she did survive, but did not have a great quality of life. ggrnw27

Hair Back.

Not EMS, but in my lab at school they talked about safety in the lab and shared how there was this girl who was in a lab with lathes (operated by spinning) and her hair was long and got caught in the machine and pulled her to it and she died. Must wear a bun in those labs, not even a pony tail will do you good. bluesapphire731

Don't be Dumb.

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People doing dumb things on the job. Moving an industrial generator? Sure, stand directly under it while the Loft is lowering it down. Have a truck load of 7,500 pound i-beams that need to be offloaded off a flatbed? Sure thing, do it by yourself with a forklift. Have a wood planer at a furniture factory that gets jammed? Go ahead, stick your arm in there to unjam it. IndWrist

REDDIT

If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/

People Who Wouldn't Quit Their Job If They Won The Lottery Explain What They Do

Reddit user BITE_AU_CHOCOLAT asked: 'People who wouldn't quit their job even if you won the lottery, what's your job?'

lottery tickets
Erik Mclean on Unsplash

A lot of workers daydream about some day winning the lottery and being able to say goodbye to their job.

Far too many workers are unhappy with their job duties, workplace dynamics or company culture.

But with a taste for luxuries like housing and food, they keep plugging away, year after year.

However not everyone feels that way about their job.

So what are these compelling careers?

Keep reading... Show less
Therapist talking during session
Photo by Mark Williams on Unsplash

Some people stand firmly stand behind their beliefs that everyone would benefit from therapy and that therapy is life-changing.

It's because of the totally life-changing truth bombs their therapist had dropped during their sessions.

Curious, Redditor anonymiss0018 asked:

"What is a little bombshell your therapist dropped in one of your sessions that completely changed your outlook?"

Communication Issues

"'If you don’t have these problems with any other person in your life, why do you think you’re the problematic person in this one?'"

- maggiebear

"I love this. I have a 'friend' who I always seem to run into misunderstandings with. Every time we had a conversation, it somehow turned into a debate even if it was me talking about my day. The conversations were never easy."

"I always evaluate myself first and take into consideration his critiques. He was very good at convincing me that I was contradicting myself or wasn't good at communicating my thoughts."

"I NEVER had this issue with ANYONE else in my life. I kept trying to figure out where the miscommunication was coming from. In the end, I just minimized contact and now I don't run into this issue."

- chobani_yo

"I read this quote somewhere once (and probably have it a bit wrong): 'It's a waste of time arguing with someone who is determined to misunderstand you.'"

- Reddit

Emotional Regulation

"'You can’t control your emotions, but you can control what you do with them.'"

"At the time, I was a young adult who had learned zero healthy emotional regulation skills (only suppression and shaming) growing up, so this blew my mind."

- lil_mermaid

Tough Relationships

"'It sounds to me like you are trying to convince yourself to stay with your girlfriend. I'm not so sure it should be so difficult.'"

"At the time he said this, I remember it was like he said, 'The earth is flat.' I thought he was crazy when he suggested relationships don't need to be difficult. But eventually, I started to realize I was trying to change myself to stay with this person rather than just being who I am."

"It took me three more months to finally break up with her but from that day on, I vowed to never again abandon myself just to be with someone I had convinced myself was better than me."

- metric88

High-Stress Situation

"I was at a high-stress time, and I asked her how people live like this."

"She replied, 'Oftentimes they have cardiac events.' She said it as an urging to care for myself as much as possible."

- KittenGr8r

The End of Alcohol

"I was struggling with my alcoholism, and we were discussing how I had been cutting back."

"She asked what I would consider success, with regard to my drinking."

"I said I wanted to get to a point where it wasn't interfering with my daily life. I wanted to just be able to have a glass of wine at holiday dinners or family gatherings."

"She simply asked me why. Why was it important for me to drink at those times?"

"It was as if she'd turned on a light. Alcohol had always been a key ingredient in every family function, for my entire life. When I smell bourbon, I think of my uncle. When I smell vermouth, I think of my dad. Alcohol ran through almost every happy childhood memory."

"But, even more than that, I was very afraid of the explanation I'd have to give when family and friends asked why I wasn't having a drink. I had tried to quit before but failed. What if I admitted my problem, only to fall off the wagon?"

"When she asked why I didn't want to completely quit, it was the first time I saw that last part of the big picture. I'd be willing to drink myself to death in order to avoid being scrutinized, or judged for possible future failures."

"That was the day I quit. I've been sober since May 6th, 2017. 2,407 days."

- sophies_wish

Acceptance vs. Enjoyment

"'Accepting something doesn’t mean you have to like it.'"

"That took away a lot of my inner conflicts about situations because I could accept a situation without expending energy internally fighting against the injustice of it."

- alibelloc

Emotionally Immature Parents

"You are not responsible for your parents' emotional wellbeing. They are independent adults who have been on this earth for many more years than you."

- SmokedPears

Not So Lazy

"'Why do you think you're lazy?' Then she listed off all the things she knows I'm doing for my family, my job, and my life."

"It kind of blew my mind when I struggled to come up with an example."

"She also described family dysfunction as water. Some families are messed up in a way that everyone can see the huge waves across the surface. Others are better at hiding it, but there's still a riptide that you can't see unless you're also in the water."

"It made me realize that trying to keep the surface from ever rippling doesn't erase what is happening underneath."

- flybyknight665

The Harm in People-Pleasing

"'Why do you make people more comfortable when you are uncomfortable?' when talking about people pleasing and fawning."

- ERsandwich

Agree to Disagree

"'Stop trying to get everyone to agree. When you need everyone to agree, the least agreeable person has all the power.'"

This really changed my outlook on planning family events."

- freef

Grieve and Start Anew

"For context, I had a major TBI (traumatic brain injury), seizures, strokes, and all around not a fun brain time when I was 28."

"They said, 'You have to grieve the loss of yourself.'"

"Most people wanted me to go back to how I was. The f**ked up truth is that part of my brain is dead. The person everyone (including myself) knew died. I needed to grieve the loss of myself."

- squeaktoy_la

Multifaceted Identity

"They told me that my job and career is just a way to make money; it's not my life or identity. That took a lot of pressure off me."

- unfairpegasus

Breaking the Cycle

"They validated me."

"'You always talk about not wanting to do to your daughters what your mom did to you. You worry about it so much in every interaction you have ever had with them."

"But your children are 19 and 21 now. They are happy and healthy and they trust you because you’ve never abused them in any way. So I just want to validate for you that you really have broken that cycle of violence."

"You did that. And you should be proud of it. I’m proud of you for it.'"

- puppsmcgee74

The Grieving Process

"I was constantly bringing up how I felt like a completely different person after my mom died... like there was a marked difference between before and after her death."

"But once, she was asking about my hobbies, I got really into describing all the things I loved to do or at least used to do before I got into a deep depression."

"She was like, 'Wow, you seem very passionate.'"

"And I just sat there like, 'Well, I mean, I can't change what I like to do, they're still fun to do.'"

"And it's like she knew when to take a step back, because it was like, wow, I may be super depressed about my mom passing, but I'm still me. I'm still my passions and those don't go away."

"I don't know, maybe it only makes sense to be, but it really started getting me back on track."

- Hannibal680

Sharing the Load

"I've never really had friends. I've had colleagues and classmates and housemates and people who have hung out with me, but I never really felt close to any of them."

"And I did that thing you see on here sometimes; I stopped reaching out to see if I would be reached out to, and I wasn't, which I took as confirmation that they didn't really want me around, or at the very least, that they wouldn't mind my absence."

"I was talking to my therapist about people I'd been close to in college, and she told me to pick one and talk about him. So I did. After I shared some basic stuff like his name and his major etc., and a couple of anecdotes, she asked me what else I knew about him."

"And I couldn't answer. It wasn't really a broadly applicable bombshell, but she said, 'What else?' and I started crying because I realized that for as simple as the question was, my inability to answer spoke volumes."

"I've never had good friends because I've never been a good friend. I'm withdrawn and reserved and I always made others do the work to drag me out, without ever extending my own friendship in a meaningful way in return. If I wanted to have meaningful relationships with other people, I would have to build them."

"I'm still working on this, but I'm trying to make more offers and extend more friendliness to others in my daily life."

- Backupusername

The discoveries in this thread were incredibly touching and profound; it's no wonder these were lasting concepts for these Redditors.

It's important to keep ourselves open to inspiration and insights from others, as we have no idea how their experiences could help us, or how we could help them.

Aerial view of a church in a small town
Sander Weeteling/Unsplash

There's something comforting about living in a small town.

It's characterized by close communities where neighbors know each other by name and there is an abundance of kindness extended to others.

Gift-giving is a commonality, as is the sharing of recipes, and people going out of their way to help each other in a time of need.

The pace of living in small towns is also a striking contradiction to city life, where crowds of people go about their busy lives without much interaction.

Curious to hear more examples of what small town living is like, Redditor official_biz asked:

"What's the most 'small town' thing you've witnessed?"

These are positive examples of a tight-knit community.

Live Updates

"We have a village Facebook page. Every time the ice cream man drives into the village, the entire page goes ballistic. People send live updates of where the van is and which direction he's heading. The ice cream man has started accepting DMs so he knows which streets to go down."

– PyrrhuraMolinae

Brush With The Law

"I’m from a town of less than 2,000 people. When I worked at the grocery store there people would often drop off stuff for my family members because they didn’t want to drive all the way down to our house. I no longer live there but recently got a call from my daughter. She had been stopped for speeding and handed over her license and insurance which happens to be in my mother’s name. The officer goes 'Hey, you’re Donnie’s granddaughter! I ain’t gonna write you a ticket but I’m telling Donnie when I see him tomorrow cause we’re going fishing.' She replied 'I think I’d rather have the ticket.'”

- Reddit

Roadside Catchup

"The traffic on the 'main street' of my town is so sparse, two drivers going opposite directions can stop and talk to each other for a few minutes without causing any problem."

– anon

When things go wrong, people take notice without incident.

Bank Robbery

"A guy robbed a bank and everyone knew immediately who he was and the teller got mad at him."

– AlexRyang

"A local bank was robbed and one of the tellers told the police to bring her a yearbook from about ten years earlier and she would be able to point the robber out. He had been in the grade before hers in school."

– Strict_Condition_632

Wise Woman

"When I worked at the bank in town there was an older lady that had worked there through 5 mergers."

"She knew everyone, there was a young guy yelling at me one day. She walked out of the back and he immediately quieted. She went off about telling his grandmother that he was treating young women like sh*t. She also said that if he didn’t straighten up not one girl in town would ever marry him she would make sure of it."

– ilurvekittens

Intoxicated Local

"Town drunk was paralyzed and used a motorized wheelchair to get around. I was driving home one Saturday night and said town drunk was passed out in his wheelchair doing circles almost directly in the town square. Had to call his brother who came and picked him up on a rollback truck. Strapped him down and drove off into the cold dark night."

– DoodooExplosion

Grazing Over To The Bar

"In my former small town, there was an older guy who'd lost his license after getting a few DUIs. Every day, he would ride his John Deere lawnmower to the corner bar around 3PM and sit around watching TV and sipping his beer well into the night. Then he'd head the couple miles back home on his mower. He even had a little canvass shell he put on when it rained or got too cold."

– brown_pleated_slacks

It's not surprising how small town people behave differently than those who are from metropolitan areas.

Welcoming Committee

"I lived in a small town. When I moved there, people would ask, 'Whose house did you buy?'"

–MoonieNine

"Move to a small town. 30 years later, you are still the new guy."

– impiousdrifter

"I lived in a small town for most of my childhood but I wasn't "from there" because my grandparents weren't from there."

– raisinghellwithtrees

"Worked with an older guy, relative of the owner of the business, he was 73. I asked him if he was a local, he said 'no his parents moved here when he was two.'"

– realneil

A Busy Day

"Lived in a town of about 5,000: A woman walked into the DMV on a Friday, saw that there were 3 people ahead of her and left to come back another time when they weren't so busy."

– KenmoreToast

Who Let The Dogs Out?

"My dogs got out while i was working. the police called my niece's elementary school (she was a 5th grader) to get her to round them up and take them back home."

– mediocrelpn

"There was a small kennel behind the police station for runaways. They called us saying they had our dog, and moments later our dog showed up home. He broke out of jail."

– Worried_Place_917

While life in a small town sounds appealing, I don't know if I can ever live in one.

I'm so used to life in big cities, I think it would be quite unnerving to adjust in a neighborhood where everyone literally knows your business.

I would be paranoid.

And I'm sure the same could be said of life in the big city.

Would you consider making the switch to life in a different setting?

Two women laughing
Photo by Dave George on Unsplash

Every now and then, a friend of ours might say something, or we might overhear a complete stranger say something that makes us stop in our tracks.

More often than not, what we can't believe we just heard is something so ridiculous, we can't help but put the person who said it in their place.

Other times, however, what we just heard might have stunned us silent because of how shockingly clever it was.

Resulting in our not wanting to scold or yell at someone, but rather give them a handshake.

Redditor SubmergingOriginal was curious to hear the sharpest and wittiest things they've ever heard, from friends and strangers alike, leading them to ask:

"Enough with the dumbest; what is the wittiest thing you've ever heard someone say?"

Don't Give Me So Much Credit...

'I was on a team at work that was on a project working insane overtime."

"One night after an 80-90 hour week, we were all sitting around the table trying to finish up so we could go home."

"Around 11, my buddy's wife called, dubious about the hours he'd been keeping."

"We heard her through the line - 'are you cheating on me?'"

"Exasperated, he looked at our boss, then replied 'honey, if I was cheating on you, I would have been home by now'."- lionbatcher

Eternal Optimism...

"Asked a blind guy if he'd been blind his whole life."

"He said 'Not yet'."- Feeling_Mode_6465

Free time Isn't The Only Thing He Has On His Hands...

"My brother got a vasectomy and when the doctor was releasing him and giving him instructions (with the nurse listening in), one of the orders was to 'come back and have a follow-up appointment after you’ve ejaculated 30 times'.”

"Without missing a beat my brother asked 'what time do you open tomorrow?'”

"The nurse couldn’t keep it together after hearing that."- UtahUtopia

Awkward Season 8 GIF by The Office Giphy

Double Whammy!

"My pal uses the phrase 'he doesn’t look strong enough to carry information' and it cracks me up every time."

"Calling someone stupid and weak in one fell swoop."- JennyW93

Can't Hide Your DNA...

'Whenever I jokingly insult my mum, she says 'that must be where you get it from'."

"She cracked the code."

"I can never offend her without offending myself."- JennyW93

Self-Sufficient!

"My brother was a line cook at a New Orleans restaurant."

"My mom was in town, staying at a fancy hotel, and he stopped by after work, still wearing his kitchen whites."

"He was reading a newspaper in the lobby waiting for her to come down when the shocked lobby manager sputtered at him, 'MAY I HELP YOU!?!?'

"He answered, 'thanks, but I know how to read',” and went back to his paper."- jobrody

Morph Current Affairs GIF by Aardman Animations Giphy

A Miracle!

"My brother-in-law’s comment."

"The entire family went out for my mother’s 80th birthday and after the meal we all went to a local park, largely occupied by the elderly, to rest."

"My mother needed crutches at this point, and they were resting against her bench."

"My 10-year-old niece, who looked like every starving waif image from Dickens, grabbed the crutches and started hobbling round the park."

"All the OAPs were following her progress with looks of pity until my brother ran up behind her, and kicked away the crutches."

"There was an audible gasp from round the park and then my niece picked the crutches back up and started chasing my brother, clearly intending to hit him."

"In the confused silence my brother-in-law’s voice rang out 'Praise be! She can walk again!'"

"We still think this was the highlight of the birthday celebrations."- DdraigGwyn

Still Legal, Whichever Way You Cut It...

"I picked up my pleasantly tipsy boyfriend from a nightclub."

"We were stopped by the Police for a random breath test."

"They asked me my age, and I said, 33."

"My bf blurted out '33? You told me you were 22'."

"Police just laughed and let me go."- Aggravating-Corgi379

Music Video Police GIF by Andrew W. K. Giphy

A Bit Too On The Nose?

"Business law class in college years ago, talking about the issues that black Americans had before the Civil Rights."

"Amendment, trying to travel through the south with the discrimination so rampant, trying to find restaurants to serve them and decent lodgings."

"My instructor was posing a hypothetical: 'So you pull up out front of this place, you're exhausted from driving for hours, and you see the sign out front says 'Ku Klux Klan Motel'."

"'What would you expect to find there?'"

"Without missing a beat, from the back of the room came this gem: "'Extra sheets in every room?'"- NedsAtomicDB

Not Yet, Anyway...

"I was working with my friend and his dad."

"My friend (26) heard an ice cream truck near where we were working."

"He asked his dad if he could have a couple dollars."

"His dad asked, 'what for?'"

"My friend told his dad that there was an ice cream truck in the neighborhood, and that they were playing music."

"My friends dad told him "'They don't charge anything to listen to the music'."- tatersalad1234567890

Words Escape You In The Literal "Heat" Of The Moment...

"A friend of mine is a teacher and her husband is known for his wit."

"She told this story to him:"

"One day at school a kid took the hall pass and returned reeking like smoke."

"She asked the kid if he’d been smoking and he denied it over and over."

"She was about to send him to the office when she noticed smoke coming from somewhere."

"She told the kid and he realized that he didn’t put his cig out completely and it was burning in his pants pocket."

"The kid noticed and frantically tried to put it out and someone finally poured water on it."

"Her husband sat listening to this with a weird look on his face."

"She asked him what was wrong."

“'What’s wrong???'"

"'This was probably the only chance you’ll have in your life to say literally, ‘liar,liar, pants on fire’ and you missed your chance'."- Luder714

On Fire No GIF by PEEKASSO Giphy

Amazing What You Might Say A Few Drinks In...

"When I went to a renaissance faire once, I went to a beer tent and ordered a Newcastle Brown Ale (seemed the most fitting for the surroundings)."

"The beer wench, without skipping a beat, said, 'Everyone wants a Newcastle - no one wants to remodel!'"- jayhof52

Read The Room People!

"My dad wiped out when skiing down a mountain and lost a ski."

"After a few minutes of hunting for it, he gives up, slings the one remaining ski over a shoulder and starts walking down the mountain in his ski boots."

"About half-way down, another skier stops and goes 'Gee! Did you lose a ski?'"

"My dad instantly replied 'No, I was out for a walk and found one!'"- PeterJoAl

There's a reason your mother always told you to "use your words".

As clever remarks can have a much more lasting effect on people than a push or shove.