Creative People Imagine What They'd Do As The Fifth Horseman Of The Apocalypse

Oh the trouble you can get into during an Apocalypse!

The sky is falling! The end is near! It's the End of Days! Feels like it sometimes doesn't it? Like we're all just surviving in what's about to be Ryan Murphy's next installment of American Horror Story. It's always one of life's greatest fears.

And you have to ask yourself sometimes, when nobody is home... if you were a key player in the Apocalypse, like say you get to be the infamous, feared '5th Horseman'... what do you do to make your Apocalypse, unique?

Redditor u/TeddyBearToons wanted to know what sort of ideas one could come up with during the end of the world... Congratulations! You've been selected as the fifth horseman of the apocalypse! What plague will you bring upon humanity?

Infrastructure is already crumbling so, why not? 

Either insanity or infrastructure collapse. The horsemen are supposed to bring the end times, not just cause suffering. So, either destroy the minds of everyone or destroy the physical embodiment of society.


So Cthulhu is the 5th horseman?


Pestilence is too on the nose...

I feel like insanity would already be covered by pestilence though. At least how I imagine it, he wouldn't just cause physical illnesses but also mental.


So, funny thing about Pestilence as a horseman; that's most popular in fictional media that wants to signify the horsemen as all different forms of destruction or curse upon humanity. War means strife between people, famine is starvation, and so pestilence as disease of any kind feels fitting in thematic way. But, death is death, and that is generally the end result of the other three anyway, so it seems a little odd if you think about it.

Original biblical translation of the Book of Revelation doesn't say the first horseman is pestilence though. It's Conquest or Victory depending on translation, and this is strange to think as fitting the theme of the four horsemen. That's likely because they aren't meant to be forms of doom, they are a series of events foretelling the doom of a society, or in the case of the Bible the doom of all humanity.

Their order of arrival is important: First a society thrives enough to commit conquest of other nations, swallowing them up and destroying them. The swelling of a nation into a kind of superpower after conquest is thought to lead to war within the nation, struggle between fellow citizens in all forms. Then the nation finds itself without enough resources and necessities, food primarily but this might mean any other break down in the society's function. Finally, that nation is dead.

There's a theory that prophecies in the bible are actually a projection of things which had already occurred for the scribes of biblical text, history they project as events will repeat in the future. The fall of the Roman Empire could be seen as the inspiration for Revelations and the four horseman metaphor, mainly due to specific details about the horseman, each a stage of Rome's eventual collapse.


Know who you are... 

Self-awareness. Turns out you are not as smart or attractive as you thought. Your chances of becoming a millionaire are not that high, either.


Self-awareness is a social skill that I think is really underplayed these days. Improving your self-awareness can help you in ways I really can't describe.


Dear God NO! 

Slow Internet.


"And lo, came the fifth horsemen, and with him a landline and dial up connection which disconnected when anyone called."


No thank you... 



Apathy seems like a pretty good thing to have if the entire world is engulfed in inescapable conquest, war, famine, and death. "Oh is this the end then? Well go on, get on with it." seems a lot better than "OH GOD NO PLEASE TAKE MY BABY BUT NOT ME"


Just kill me... 

Your left sock is always moist.


How dare you! 

Missing semicolons.


Or worse; misused semicolons.


Easy there; Satan.


I get to keep my pills right?

Never be truly comfortable while sitting or laying down.


Add just pure insomnia and constant restless leg syndrome.


Any other video... please! 

You internet connection is almost always slow. Sometimes the page will take a few seconds to load, but you're used to it taking a long time, so you click reload right as it loads and it takes another 5 minutes to load. Half the videos you watch are just Bill Clinton saying "I did not have sexual relations with that woman."


Heed the signs! 

Procrastination. Civilization will crumble... tomorrow, or maybe next Tuesday.


This. We are able to do something against war, famine and disease, we're just not doing it.



Among the many reasons people watch, and rewatch, sitcoms is to imagine your life was more like the one you were watching.

Being able to afford a two-bedroom apartment in Greenwich Village on a line cook's salary, somehow always having the comfortable sofa available at your favorite coffee shop whenever you pop in, or having your best friends always available at your beck and call whenever you need them.

For the romantics, however, it's wishing you could have a romance like you've seen on television.

True not all sitcom romances are exactly the sort that makes you go all aflutter (Were Ross and Rachel actually on a break? And don't even get me started about Ted and Robin.)

Other sitcom couples are so captivating, though, that we would have given anything to be at their wedding... or at the very least go to their home for dinner every Friday.

And this includes plutonic couples, as there is nothing more heartwarming than a lasting friendship.

Keep reading...Show less
a woman with her hands on her face
Photo by Kier in Sight on Unsplash

As an editor, I am not just in charge of proofreading and correcting style and format. I am also in charge of making sure all the contact information provided, such as phone numbers and emails, work.

After working for 10 hours straight a few months ago, I forgot to check the phone numbers and let a brochure go to publication with a phone number that did not work.

Luckily, a similar mistake had actually happened before with another editor for another client a year prior, so contact info on print materials like this brochure were checked by every department rather than just editorial, and the mistake was caught.

Since I didn't know this, when I heard the phone number was wrong, my heart dropped to my stomach and I thought I was sure fired. Luckily, I was just told to make sure this never happens again. I was relived that there was no fallout, but when I first heard what happened, my only thought was. 'I totally f**ked up!'

Redditors are no strangers to this feeling, as they've made egregious mistakes themselves. They are only too eager to share their experiences.

Keep reading...Show less

With the world's finances the way they are, it's a miracle if people can save their spare change.

Inflation has a stronghold on too many people.

Sometimes it feels like just breathing can cost you money.

It's hard to make and absurdly easy to lose.

So be vigilant with your wallet.

And try to spend on certain things in moderation.

Going out for meals three times a day adds up.

Even with Wendy's value menu.

Keep reading...Show less

We all have strong opinions about something, but when we think of opinions, we often think of hot button topics like political subjects.

But as it turns out, sometimes we can have just as strong of opinions of our preferred types of pasta.

Keep reading...Show less