Whoops! I didn't know THAT was going to happen.
Surprising when your heart starts pumping and you get a little hot and bothered and you aren't even doing anything close to THAT....but oops. Here you are.
What are the weird ways it's happened to you?
u/anadventurousguy asked:
What did a friend of yours do that turned you on without them knowing it?
Here were some of the answers.
Up To The Highest Height
GiphyWent to visit a group of friends after I had moved to another town 3 hours away. One guy friend (I'm F) got this giddy look, ran, jumped over a railing in some crazy smooth pro-athlete style, and enveloped me in this huge bear hug. Was not expecting that and whoah felt things for him I had never before.
Up-Down
A college housemate was on the couch next to me as we watched TV one night. She mentioned a concert that was coming up and asked if I was down to go, I wasn't too keen so I turned and have her a blank stare.
She held my gaze and moved her eyebrows up and down twice quickly.
The effect was devastating.
I don't know if it counts as 'turned on' or a moment of deep infatuation, but I still think about those eyebrows
Contact
Was friends with a high school crush. We had a class together and would occasionally have chill days. I was sitting in front of her and turned my desk 90° so I could comfortably talk to her. She then picked her legs up and put them across mine.
Makeover
15 years ago my friend at uni invited some of us over to watch him play Resident Evil 4 that had just been released on the GameCube and later watch a film.
Knocked on his door, he answered. He had picked up his new glasses and had a haircut when he picked up the game in town. Something about his new look stirred something inside me.
Started dating 4 years later and we're getting married next year.
Leggy Ideas
She was meant to go out but ended up sitting with me chatting. She was all dressed up and because of the way she was sitting her dress kept sliding up her thigh. She fixed it twice but stopped trying (her thigh wasn't totally exposed but a bit more was showing off).
That's how I realised I have a thing for legs.
Look Shock
I have an attractive female friend who I was visiting. We were sitting in her kitchen and she got up to get a Coke from her refrigerator. She was wearing short shorts and as she bent over to get the soda she asked me if I wanted anything. It took me a few seconds but I managed to say no. I lied.
Chills From Beyond
I was sitting and focused on my work in front of me, and she came up behind me and ran her hand across the top of my head, and I wouldn't say it turned me on, but it was an instant sensation over my entire scalp and down my spine, and my neck stopped supporting my head for a moment.
Gh...Ghostbusters?
The restaurant I used to work at had a vacuum we could use that was shaped as a big red box that you could strap to your back like a backpack. It definitely looked straight out of ghostbusters.
My very cute coworker was using it and when I jokingly asked if she was having fun she responded with "who ya gonna call?" <wink>
This was almost ten years ago
Lazy Sleepy Love
Ahhh I remember back in high school I had this crush on my friend and he came over for some reason or another. As soon as he entered my room he kind of just flopped himself back to lay down on my bed and stretched out lazily. I went bright red and couldn't focus on anything. Eugh, it's been a long time since I've felt that way about anyone.
I Missed The Entire Second Half
GiphyA friend of mine asked me to hang out with her in her dorm room. We were planning on watching a movie, but at the same time she said she was going to do some laundry. I told her I had no issue helping her with, i.e. carrying the actual laundry bag. I knew she was kind of taking advantage of me, but she also made killer nachos, so it seemed like a fair trade.
When I got there she was essentially wearing sleepwear. A tank top half shirt and very tight red running shorts. It was very difficult to pay attention to movie.
Careless Whisper...
GiphyNo matter the person, anyone whispering in my ear turns me on. It doesn't even matter what they say haha. SaraSmile416
Just a Bit.
I was wrestling with a girl (not "fake" wrestling, both of us were actually trying to win and we were in a ring) who I wasn't really interested in. When she had me in a hold that I wasn't able to get out of I got a small chub. aegroti
Vampires.
She bit me in the face. Softly. BigTastyBacon2
Biting is like kissing but with a winner. ThePottamus
I Love You.
One of my friends once said, as she looked at herself in the mirror, "Damn, I'd sex myself." Really turned me on for some reason. Rowan_Oathsworn21
Goodbye Horses starts playing. Ncrawler65
Erotic....ca
GiphyI was wearing a jacket that was unzipped. She put her arms inside my jacket to hug me goodbye. Felt weird for some reason, even though it was outside the shirt I was wearing. ImperialArmorBrigade
That's super personal space. That's what made it so... erotic... Jasole37
More than 30 Seconds....
Long, affectionate hugs. An attractive female friend of mine gave me a hug that lasted around 30 seconds and she was squeezing me the entire time.
Halfway into the hug, I popped an unexpected erection that I'm pretty sure poked her thigh. I don't think she noticed, and if she did, she never said anything about it. dailydonuts16
I'm so Tipsy....
Once a friend saved my tipsy butt from being flattened by an oncoming vehicle, he wrapped one arm around my waist and pulled me backwards into him... I don't know if it was the unexpected physical contact or the alcohol or what but I could NOT stop thinking about my weird new inappropriate crush for weeks after. ShinyFabulous
By the Touch....
It's a little embarrassing but I had a work friend who laughed as she grabbed my arm after I told her a joke. coffeeNiK
The physical touch combined with emotion. anadventurousguy
Jump! For my Love!
GiphyShe got startled and jumped onto me.
Not like full on she was in my arms, but we were standing next to each other, something went bang, and she just turned and grabbed me.
Instant erection. thedankbank1021
All Hands on Me.
So it was the day after this huge natural disaster happened (major news story in the US in August 2017) and the government agency I work for was like, "all hands on deck," so every civil engineer was assigned to relief and recovery efforts, including me. The guy who sat next to me at work was your typical nerdy engineer, but dressed nicer...
...then as I was waiting outside to be sent to the field, I saw him getting out of a truck wearing dirty jeans, steel toe boots, and carrying his hard hat, looking all sweaty and dirty and delicious.
He's my boyfriend now. tacosandrose
Reddit user Janine_18 asked:
"What's the one thing you'll never tell your SO?"
Love/Hate Relationship
"She loves her siblings and hates her parents."
"I hate her siblings and love her parents."
"They were very tight with their parents for the first 3 years of our relationship, and in 2017-2018 all hell broke loose so to say. My partner has no personal animus towards her parents, she is however extremely close to her older sibling who has a heap of problems with their parents."
"My partner follows their lead and it guides her own relationship with their parents. And the reason her siblings have huge problems with their parents is that they retired, moved 20(!) whole minutes away from their childhood home and went on a vacation for a month.
"They are apparently 'selfish', 'inconsiderate', and 'don’t think of themselves as parents'. This despite the fact that they call and visit for every holiday, birthday, promotion, celebration of any kind. Dog and babysit. Frequently host. Communicate well."
"No the absolute truth is that my partner's siblings are black holes and not great."
"Would 'I radically dislike your one sibling and don’t trust the other at all” be a viable middle ground?'."
~ Agreed_fact
Sweet Tooth
"A few years ago, my girlfriend put a candy bowl in our hallway at our apartment for Halloween. She came home that day to discover that nobody took any candy, and she was a little bummed."
"Over the course of that week, I'd take candy out before work or when she was asleep."
"She got so happy that 'the neighbors loved the candy'. She does this every year now, and I have to continuously swipe the candy and pretend it is the neighbors."
"It makes her happy, and I get free candy. Win win."
~ AlecsWebHair
GiphyIn It For the House
"That I know she cheated on me and the only reason I haven't left her is because the mortgage interest rates are a bit high so I can't comfortably buy her half of the equity we have in the house."
"I got a valuation, a mortgage pre-approval, and a lawyer all ready to go... But would only have about $21 per week to spare... I'd be screwed the first time a major appliance or the car breaks down..."
~ H_He_Metals
Mommy Dearest
"That her mother is a bad person in disguise of a caring and beloved figure."
~ Relative_Rich8169
"My pet name for my girlfriend is Bambi."
"She thinks it's because has big brown eyes, but really it's because I want to shoot her mother with a rifle."
~ airblizzard
Giphy"That's my mother in law. For her daughter, she'll do anything... to the point that it's overbearing and controlling and difficult to deal with."
"And for everyone else, she is one of the least empathetic people I've ever met..."
"She CRIED when Rush Limbaugh died, and she literally said the Proud Boys are like the Boy Scouts. But she'll drop $2,000 on Christmas presents for one person like it's nothing, so she thinks she's owed respect and kind words."
"I literally had to tell her at one point, 'If you want me to stop calling you a Nazi, buying me more presents or arguing with me isn't going to do it, you have to stop saying Nazi-friendly sh*t'. But she didn't stop, of course."
"She thought COVID was no big deal until a family member died of it."
"She also makes tons of snide comments about my work. I'm a lawyer in Big Law, I make great money but it's soul sucking and I never wanted to do this forever, I want to work for the government."
"She'll see a postal worker and say 'That'll be you one day, government worker, not a great way to provide for my daughter'."
"Her daughter, my wife, is a DOCTOR who is going to make more than I do no matter what job I work, and she herself is a dentist who worked until her banker husband could retire at the same time as her."
"She talks sh*t about how I made her daughter an atheist (I didn't, she did that on her own), but she herself has NEVER read the Bible and hasn't been to church in 20 years."
"She unironically believes in aliens, Big Foot, and ghosts, and thinks she saw Mother Mary in the sky."
"All the bad things I tend to think about Republicans (they don't care about an issue until it personally affects them, they have no standards except double standards, they use religion as a cudgel but don't actively live a spiritual life, they believe insane sh*t with zero evidence, they're old fashioned and judgy and can't accept that the world is changing around them, etc...) is her to the letter."
~ 2Charming-Fig-2544
Magic the Retirement Fund
"How much my Magic the Gathering collection is worth."
"They'll absolutely try to get me to sell some of it."
"It's my precious."
~ Ganthamus_prime
GiphyFirst Impressions
"When he and I first met, I was CERTAIN he was gay."
"He is very much NOT gay."
"And he will NEVER know I ever thought this."
~ ShinyIrishNarwhal
No Llama Drama
"When me and my wife first started dating, I had a dumb canvas painting with a llama and rabbit on it that I found at Walmart. I showed it to her and told her how much I loved it just because it was just such a dumb random thing to find."
"For some reason she took that as I love llamas and that they are my favorite animal. So now, every time she sees one or something with a llama on it I see her brighten up to show me and I get excited with her!"
"Llamas are not my favorite animal. Never have been. I don’t know how she made this connection, but i will never tell her otherwise because seeing her face light up every time is way better."
~ WhereTheChapstickAt
GiphyRelationship by Google
"I spend a couple hours doing research on how to make relationships work and keep her happy in the long run."
"She thinks I'm this awesome perfect guy but I just do what the internet tells me."
~ BadRobot___
Chemical Warfare
"He thinks I don’t fart around him because I’m too shy or polite."
"It’s really because they are so bad they could kill a horse."
~ Neonpantsuit
GiphyAre There Raisins?
"I don't like the potato salad she makes, and she always tries to make it as a treat for me."
"It's my mom's recipe, but doesn't taste like mom's."
~ Bean_Juice_Brew
*yawn* 🥱
"The spot you make me sleep in on the bed is uncomfortable but I lay there because you're comfortable where you are."
~ legacyrisky
GiphyConfessions
"We’re both in college, and last semester we both had a cold at some point. He had it much, much worse than I did, so I went to class and he skipped."
"Afterwards, I went to his dorm to share notes and take a nap. I was almost asleep, and I’m assuming he thought I was, because I felt him squeeze me and whisper, 'I love you so f**king much'.”
"It was the sweetest thing ever and I’m never telling him I know he did that."
~ scorpiomooon
Maybe a Farm Upstate?
"I definitely didn't kill that massive spider, and I have no idea where it went."
~ Cothak88
GiphySo, these weren't too awful, right?
What secrets are you keeping?
People's Wildest 'WTF Is Wrong With You?' Experiences
We all have that moment where someone we know says something so completely absurd, the only response we think of is 'WTF is wrong with you?'
Sometimes, it's something woefully inaccurate that you can't wrap your head around the fact that someone believes that.
Othertimes, it's something completely offensive and you regret your association with that person.
My college roommate was a girl I knew from my high school. I didn't know her too well, but we had some big things in common, so I figured it'd be fun to live with her.
This girl was half-Korean and talked a lot about racist people. At first, I let her rant, figuring maybe she or someone in her family faced some racism. I faced some myself, and I agreed with most of the things she said about racists. Eventually, however, I realized she was equating the word 'racist' with the word 'white.'
I spoke to her once, telling her she can't use 'racist' and 'white' interchangeably. She agreed to stop doing that, but within a few days, she started doing it again. She was a very bright girl, so I was a little concerned about this, especially since her own dad was white and was possibly the nicest man in the world. Not to mention, this made her and her siblings half-white too. Did that mean they were all half-racist?
I stuck by her for a while, but when she started saying things about what she wanted to do to racist people (once again using the word 'white' instead of 'racist'), I realized I couldn't be around her anymore. She couldn't talk about anything else after a while, and every time she spoke, I wanted to say, 'WTF is wrong with you?'
We did not room together the next year.
Redditors have stories similar to mine (and some even crazier), and they are eager to share.
It all started when a Redditorasked:
How To End A Friendship
"In college I used to kill time between classes hanging out with a guy who was from the same redneck county as myself. We didn’t really have much else in common, but he was nice enough and seemed eager to socialize so I figured why not. I wasn’t overly social myself and didn’t know a whole lot of people."
"One day we decided to go somewhere off-campus, and he drove us. While driving, on an interstate mind you, he proceeds to show me his handgun that he kept in his truck - not in a menacing way, but in a “Ain’t that cool?” way."
"I was not immediately frightened, but I respect firearms enough to recognize we are going like 60-70mph on an interstate in daylight, and nothing good can happen in this scenario. I calmly asked him to put it away because I was not comfortable in this situation at all. He then tells me “Oh it’s not loaded” and presses the gun to his head before pulling the trigger."
"Thank f**k he was right, but still it was a wild and frightening display of reckless disregard for his own life and mine for that matter in the event that he’d accidentally killed himself while driving us. I didn’t hang out with him much after that, certainly didn’t get in a car with him."
– omjf23
"“It’s not loaded” famous last words of many an idiot."
– GloInTheDarkUnicorn
The Worst Kind Of People
"When my dad was in the nursing home, they weren't running certain expenses, like ambulance rides, through his insurance. When I took over his financials, he was tens of thousands in medical debt that shouldn't have ever been charged to him in the first place. He was in numerous collections, and his credit score was tanked."
"When I complained to the nursing home director, he said, "Well, it's not like he's going to be buying a house or a car!" Then he laughed."
"My dad was paralyzed from the waist down and needed lifelong care, so he was never going to leave the nursing home. Even though he was technically correct, I gave him the "WTF is wrong with you look." Then I complained to HIS boss and he got canned a couple a weeks later. My dad's insurance was fixed pretty quick, too."
– MNWNM
"“Sorry, what was funny about that? Could you please explain.”"
– v3n0mat3
...Seriously?
"MIL told my wife she should divorce me bc I googled whether a lasagna should be covered with foil while cooking."
– Struggle-Silent
"This is my first laugh of the thread lmao wtf."
– koreantrvp
"It actually ruined this entire trip. It was at my BIL’s wedding, which was only close family (siblings + parents) and they had the caterer make a lasagna for an evening dinner."
"Father of the bride was gonna pop it in the oven and asked if it should be covered. I googled lasagna cooking instructions and said yes it should be covered and cooked at this temp. MIL said absolutely not!"
"Me and the father of the bride kinda gave each other a look and he covered it. MIL was furious and texted my wife that I was an a hole and she should divorce me before we had kids."
– Struggle-Silent
Hostile Work Environment
"Boss at old job told the team we needed to ‘get used to a healthy level of conflict, fear and anxiety in the workplace.’ I dipped so fast after that."
– Prestigious-Energy69
"Similarly, a boss told me that I owed him my loyalty because he was paying me."
– Kylearean
How To End A Relationship
"A girl I was with while we were still together just looked at me while I was driving to her house and said.” You know I would get over you faster than you’d get over me” I was like …… Tf did you just say?"
– omega91301
"Huh. And just like that I'm over you."
– Pineapple_Spenstar
"Honestly, that would absolutely do it for me. When I was younger, I would be stupid and hurt and argue. I'm past 50 and I got no time for that nonsense."
– Terpsichorean_Wombat
There Are Other Ways To Stave Off Boredom
"I was DD for some buddies who wanted to go to a particular dance club in Baltimore. They're all hammered, it's too loud and we've been there for several hours. Casually an older woman next to me chats me up and notices my eyes are nearly crossing from boredom. I explained what I was doing there and casually (stupidly) mentioned I'm a bit bored. This psycho BITES ME on the chest! Afterward says "Well ya ain't bored now, are ya??""
– Mike7676
"Well, were you bored after that?"
– DontWannaSayMyName
"I must say, I was not!"
– Mike7676
That Goes Both Ways!
"I'm a man who works with kids, and when I started this job, I was talking to one of my old coworkers about how every once in a while I'll get weird looks for being a man working with kids and my coworker said I deserved it because some men can't be trusted with kids. I was shocked and she went on to say that I did it to myself and deserve to be questioned about it. I immediately stopped talking to her."
– Dolhedew
"What? What in the actual f**k? Doesn’t she know there are women who can’t be trusted with kids?"
– Anonymoosehead123
That Escalated Quickly
"The lady that accused my kids of cutting the line. (They hadn't, I was watching). When I went to ask her what was wrong, she told me to go back to my own country with that sh*t. (I was born in Massachusetts.)"
"The line was to pet dogs at a Renaissance Fair."
– pasafa
Everything All At Once
"While alone with a coworker, he told me that "women in the work place will lead to the decay of the fabric of society" to me. A woman. He also asked me out, got an attitude when I didn't say yes and continues to walk around with huge incel energy. He always complains that he has no one to go home to yet refuses to look at himself as a possible reason."
– Nopeferatu31
"Sounds like they should learn something from the phrase, "if you meet one a**hole, they're the a**hole. If everyone you meet is an a**hole, you're the a**hole.""
– tmpope123
Ouch!
"I told a coworker my wife had died."
"Her response: "You're one of those bald middle aged guys with a dead wife.""
"Me: "Yeah.""
– WalrusCello
"I want to think this was a wholesome thought that came out wrong. An awkward attempt at dark humor."
– ThisUsernameIsTook
*Cringing*
"Had an otherwise normal co-worker who was completely convinced windmills will cause the earth to stop spinning."
– Shadowmant
"WINDMILLS DO NOT WORK THAT WAY! GOOD NIGHT!"
– Torvaun
These are all crazy 'WTF is wrong with you' stories, but that last one blew my mind in 'how is it possible people think that could be true' sort of way!