Generational Gaps<p>"Not a dad myself, but an uncle. My sister in law is a mostly stay at home mom, but teaches a yoga class once or twice a week. My brother obviously has to look over his kids during that time."</p><p>"My parents constantly refer to that as babysitting... and it drives me nuts. I constantly interject, and tell them that that's just parenting, but there's just something the older generation doesn't get about that."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/jk7jhc/as_a_dad_how_much_does_it_annoy_you_when_you_take/gahlv5t?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">P0ster_Nutbag</a></p>
How to Silence a Room<p>"The line 'Yeah ever since their mum died' usually shuts them down pretty quick." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/jk7jhc/as_a_dad_how_much_does_it_annoy_you_when_you_take/gahdgio?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Guerenica</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"That's brutal. I love it." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/jk7jhc/as_a_dad_how_much_does_it_annoy_you_when_you_take/gahnogd?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">deadbass72</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"'Actually, I kidnapped them... does that still qualify?'" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/jk7jhc/as_a_dad_how_much_does_it_annoy_you_when_you_take/gaief8q?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Lemesplain</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"I don't have any zingers like that, I usually just tell them that when they're your own kids, they call it 'parenting'" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/jk7jhc/as_a_dad_how_much_does_it_annoy_you_when_you_take/gajbrtp?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">BigPZ</a></p>
A Dad, Beard and All<p>"As a tall (6'4") and Large (300lb) quit hairy and bearded man with twin girls, when they were younger I got a lot of old ladies saying stuff like 'that man should NOT be with those little girls.'" </p><p>"Like yeah, f*** me for looking like sasquatch and having kids, right?"</p><p>"As they've gotten older, its got better. I don't get comments like that anymore. But if I take them to the park all of the moms avoid me."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/jk7jhc/as_a_dad_how_much_does_it_annoy_you_when_you_take/gahpry3?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">MediocreFisherman</a><br></p>
Punished for Being Present<p>"I became a father at a young age (17) and when I would pick up my daughter and take her out for dinner just me and her--it's a weekly thing for us..."</p><p>"you wouldn't believe the dirty looks and rude comments I've received from people about being a creep especially when she was about 14 to age 20..."</p><p>"...she's 22 now, and now it has changed to other men giving me the thumbs up and basically saying nice job on getting a young lady, and they having absolutely no clue that I'm just hanging out with my daughter."</p><p>"People suck"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/jk7jhc/as_a_dad_how_much_does_it_annoy_you_when_you_take/gai4u1f?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Tyco2018</a></p>
Skewed Standards<p>"My husband had dinner with this family while I was out of town once. They kept praising him and calling him just such a great dad."</p><p>"All because he didn't order alcohol at the restaurant. Because he didn't drive drunk with our kids. That's how low they set the bar for him. Meanwhile they have never called me a good anything."</p><p>"He is a good dad and yes, he was annoyed by this."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/jk7jhc/as_a_dad_how_much_does_it_annoy_you_when_you_take/gaijemh?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">flashmonkey26</a></p>
An Unwanted Title<p>"I don't know if anyone else gets this line often, but I do. 'Oh, looks like you're Mr. mom today' There's a word for dad. It's dad." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/jk7jhc/as_a_dad_how_much_does_it_annoy_you_when_you_take/gahntnk?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">deadbass72</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"I have gotten that a few times."</p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"After the first time it happened, any time it had happened since, I've looked the person in the eyes and said, 'Yeah, she's Mrs. Dad today, we like to role play like that, kinky isn't it?' and then just continue what I'm doing before I was interrupted." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/jk7jhc/as_a_dad_how_much_does_it_annoy_you_when_you_take/gaivkjg?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">masheduppotato</a></p>
Everybody Loses<p>"I think a lot of mothers are annoyed by this too.. it makes it sound as if taking care of the children as solely 'her duty'..." </p><p>"...and if the father is being a father, that means she's slacking on her duties and using a 'baby-sitter.'"</p><p><span></span>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/jk7jhc/as_a_dad_how_much_does_it_annoy_you_when_you_take/gahim2c?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">AlienAle</a></p>
Even the Infrastructure is Presumptuous<p>"To pile on, the worst is when you can't find a baby changing station in the men's room and there is no 'family room.'"</p><p>"I've straight up overtaken a women's room, so that I could change a diaper."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/jk7jhc/as_a_dad_how_much_does_it_annoy_you_when_you_take/gah91q1?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">RatherNerdy</a></p>
Wildly Impressed<p>"I've never gotten that. However the amount of people that have seen me alone with my daughter and act as though I'm the only man they've seen spending time together with their little girl is literally insane to me."</p><p>"One woman insisted on buying our lunch because of it."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/jk7jhc/as_a_dad_how_much_does_it_annoy_you_when_you_take/gaho36g?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">GreatScotch</a></p>
Mic Drop<p>"I had this happen a few times when bringing my daughter places. She was 6 when we went I brought her to an auto race. This complete stranger who looks about the same age as me, with his younger girlfriend is leaning back on the seat a few rows down."</p><p>"He looks back and says, 'Let me guess. The ex wouldn't keep her this weekend?'"</p><p>"I was a bit surprised at the question. But I answered, 'Not at all. Just a father sharing his love of the sport like my father did with me.'" </p><p>"Then I held my left hand up and said, 'It's nice to know one of us hasn't failed at marriage or parenting for that matter.'"</p><p>"Didn't hear another word from him."</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/jk7jhc/as_a_dad_how_much_does_it_annoy_you_when_you_take/gaikj66?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">RabbitOfCaerbonnog</a></p>
Children are not for everyone. Yes, to some they are "bundles of joy," but to others, they are simply not a good choice.
For example-children are expensive. Most millennials don't make a ton of money, hardly enough to support themselves, let alone a family.
Others see the state of the world and think, "Why would I bring a child into this?"
Not My Style<p>There doesnt have to be a reason. I dont want to raise kids. You can choose not to work a desk job or choose not to own a vehicle without a big discussion, but if you choose to not have children, people suddenly get interested in your business. I don't want to. Simple as that</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/tbwear/" target="_blank">tbwear</a></p>
Not Responsible Enough<p>The idea of being in charge of another human being, scares me.</p><p>It seems like a lot of things can inadvertently go wrong, even if you try your damn hardest to be the best parent you can possibly be. I mean, just take a look around you, at your peers or even at yourself. Pretty much no one comes out of their childhood unscathed. You got humans raising humans, so there's bound to be mistakes made along the way.</p><p>It's a lot of responsibility. It's a lot of time and it's a lot of money.</p><p>More power to the people who choose to become parents but I wish more people took the time to better understand the full commitment that they are about to embark on for the rest of their lives. When you become a parent, you no longer live your own life, your life now revolves around making sure that you are providing the best possible life for your child. It can mean a lot of sacrificing to ensure that your child has a better life.</p><p>For many people, just because they can have a kid, it doesn't mean that they should.</p><p>That's my two cents. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/virtual_GH0ST/" target="_blank">virtual_GH0ST</a></p>
Pain<p>I don't ever, ever, ever want to go thorough pregnancy. It's terrifying to me. Also I just don't think I'd be a good parent. I'm still recovering from my own childhood; I shouldn't be responsible for someone else's.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/ohnoallie/" target="_blank">ohnoallie</a></p>
Not My Path<p>I just don't see the appeal.</p><p>People have different dreams in life.</p><p>Some want to achieve great things, some want to help other life, some want to conquer the planet that has life, some want to look for undiscovered life.</p><p>It just happens that the natural biological imperative is to reproduce & make more life - hence the idea is so common.</p><p>I just don't want to do that, simple as.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/ObjectiveAvacado/" target="_blank">ObjectiveAvacado</a></p>
Anxiety<p>I feel like I'd ruin them. I feel like I'd be an awful mother and make my child grow to resent me. I feel like I would completely fail a small human, or at the very least my self hatred would be reflected onto them and they would feel less loved and valued because of my mental illnesses.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/CaaaaakeRose/" target="_blank">CaaaaakeRose</a></p>
Peace And Quiet<p>I just have no desire to. Having kids is too much of a hassle and I would much rather spend my time and money on myself than on a child. Plus, I enjoy the freedom and peaceful quietness that I get from being childfree.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Vinny_Lam/" target="_blank">Vinny_Lam</a></p>
Mental Health<p>Personally I don't see how it could make me happy. I'm very insecure about my own body and I would hate it so much more if I got pregnant and had a child. I never think I'm good enough at anything so I would kill myself worrying about if I'm a good enough parent. I don't see how dealing with behaviour, eating being a hassle, never having time for yourself, a child waking you up early, having someone else to worry about, and having more expenses could possibly make anyone happy. Maybe I will change my mind when I'm older, but I won't even be thinking about having a child until I'm fully happy with myself and my mental health has improved.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/EatTh3rich/" target="_blank">EatTh3rich</a></p>
Money Money Money<p>The cost of having a child, plus I have a lovely host of diseases on both sides of my family that I could potentially pass on to my hypothetical child (Alzheimer's, diabetes, high blood pressure, weight problems, and so on).</p><p>Plus I don't want my life to be restricted - if I want to go on holiday, I don't want to have to wait until school holiday time so my child can come too (plus then you end up paying double the price, because that's when everyone wants to travel somewhere). If I want to move from one house to another (or hell, from one country to another), I don't want to have to worry about finding a house in the radius of a good school. I also don't want to constantly fret about my child's academic development - getting them into good primary schools (the best one in my city charges something ridiculous like $40,000 per annum for years 1-6), then worrying about getting them into a good university, and so on.</p><p>I want to be able to live my life freely - spend my income on fun things like a quick weekend getaway to the wine country, or whatever. I don't want to tie myself down.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/FauxPoesFoes228/" target="_blank">FauxPoesFoes228</a></p>
Bad Lineage<p>Family history for disorders like autism, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia. Thankfully all I have is anxiety, but my mental health combined with the thought of having a child that struggles similarly or worse scares me. For the longest time I dreamed of the marriage/kids route, but there are a lot of "what-ifs" that have made me decide it would not be good for me or the child. It's hard enough some days for me to keep my shit together, adding a child on top of that seems like a not good idea.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Meganthefallen/" target="_blank">Meganthefallen</a></p>
A Bad Direction For The World<p>The environment is only gonna get worse tbh, the competition in schools and the workplace as well. Also, children are expensive and it's a little hard to travel the world for months when you have kids around. And I guess kids seem like they could turn out nasty too easily and I don't really wanna deal with that. That's probably about all the reasons.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/foxtailavenger/" target="_blank">foxtailavenger</a></p>
Anti-Motherhood<p>Motherhood is a trap. If you stay home you have no income that you could possibly use to regain your independence if your relationship fails, if you keep working people think you're a bad mother, and no matter what, as the woman the majority of the housework and childrearing will be dumped on you (even if your partner says he'll do his fair share)</p><p>Having kids chains you to the person you have them with. It stifles your dreams for yourself, every good part of yourself is sucked out for the kids.</p><p>It's a straight up snare trap that you can never escape from (from my perspective)</p><p><span></span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/El-Ahrairah9519/" target="_blank">El-Ahrairah9519</a></p>
A Hugely Analytical Look<p>Having kids is a bizarre combination of selfish and selfless behavior. You have to give up your autonomy completely, a totally selfless act right? Except you're doing it in the name of creating a half copy of you in order to maintain the future spreading of your DNA all over the world. I think a lot of people do it just because it's "what your supposed to do" and end up dropping the ball and creating dead weight in the world or worse. I think child rearing is only something worth doing if you put in 100% and I am not prepared to commit to that. If you drop the ball you may well be making the world shittier because of your selfish whim to clone yourself</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/EatsLocals/" target="_blank">EatsLocals</a></p>
Unfair Expectations<p>A few different things, one big reason is that I am consumed with my goals and I worry that I would be absent or resentful. A second concern is that the child would become a project and that I would push them too hard. It's an atmosphere I grew up in and, while it has shaped me in a big way, it created a lot of anger and resentment.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/ARollingShinigami/" target="_blank">ARollingShinigami</a></p>
When It Passes Along<p>Aside from enjoying my lifestyle as it is (which would basically become nonexistent since my hobbies are both expensive and not child conducive) my real answer is that my mother has suffered with depression her whole life and so have I and I can't imagine creating something I love more than anything only to pass (essentially) my family defect onto them and watch them suffer with it for their entire life.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/YaBoiAggroAndy/" target="_blank">YaBoiAggroAndy</a></p>
Kids? Ew, Next<p>I just kind of don't like children.</p><p>I don't like people much to begin with, but I get on with some people if we have similar senses of humour or interests.</p><p>Kids are like extra-annoying miniature people. They're loud, obnoxious. They require near constant care/supervision/attention until they're 13/14 or so. They ask stupid questions and require me to dedicate large chunks of my time and attention to them, much less bankroll everything they need - which is a lot.</p><p>The upside is, what? I get a child that lives in my house and calls me "Mum"? That's a terrible trade!</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/knightsbridge-/" target="_blank">knightsbridge-</a></p>
It's Much Too Hard<p>Not a solid never, but I nannied for 7 years and helped raise 2 sets of kids (3 infants from newborn to 4/5 year old kids).</p><p>Being a nanny you get to see the dynamic of the families you work with and you also are the person mom and dad vent to and it just seems really... hard? Especially with all the stress with the world we live in, should they be enrolled in more activities? Should we be doing more at home with them? If they're not in private school Will they get a decent education and go to college? How do we pay for that? Who will pay for braces? Who will pay for therapy if something traumatic happens or they need help? Who can watch them when both parents work?</p><p>I respect parents but I'm just not sure that I want to bring a child into this mess nor am I sure that I want to allocate all my funds and time to raising a little tiny person. It's a giant commitment and seeing it from the inside, I'm Just not sure it's the choice I want to make for myself..</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/phatgenesss/" target="_blank">phatgenesss</a></p>
Much has been written about motherhood and fatherhood, about how it changes you, ushers in a swift change in priorities.