Celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay is highly regarded for his delicious plates, his ability to run a solid restaurant, and, let's face it, his stage presence.
He's also a foul-mouthed Brit who is all too willing to dismantle people's self-esteems and compare them to livestock animals.
Alas, as watching all reality television goes, we love to see the crashing and burning.
But what if the shoe was on the other foot? What if you were the one being torn into by the sailor of all chefs, Mr. Gordon Ramsay.
Wondering what horrible dishes were lurking in unknown kitchens all over the place, Redditor FalloutSl*t413 asked:
"What's something you made that was 100% delicious but Gordon Ramsay would slap you for anyway?"
Some people talked about those purely functional meals that are just perfect for piling on enough protein and calories to get through the day.
"My mom used to make us 'Volcanoes.' Mashed potatoes topped with ground beef with some ketchup. I still tear it up to this day."
Quick and Easy
"I make weeknight 'enchiladas.' "
"You stick frozen taquitos in a casserole dish and cover them with canned or frozen chili and cheese. Bake them until everything's hot, serve with a dollop of sour cream. They sound disgusting but they taste amazing, and they take like, five minutes to prep."
"I know it looks like, smells like, and probably tastes like cat food but potted meat sandwiches. Look, when you're poor as hell and you can make 3 sandwiches with one little can that cost like 20 cents, it's pretty good."
"While I'm at it, Treet and bologna are pretty great. I have the taste palette of a raccoon and I like it that way."
"When I was younger I would make this thing where it was a patty melded of:"
- "a can of tuna"
- "two eggs
"And I would eat that almost daily, pan-fried, for lunch. Just slap me now and lets get it over with."
Others shared the recipes they make to feel fancy despite being totally trashy.
A Nuanced Process
"I call them 'chicken puffs.' Some par-cooked chicken (white or dark meat, either works) with sauteed serrano peppers and onions and garlic."
"All wrapped in crescent roll dough in little balls (a bit smaller than a baseball), put in a casserole tray filled juuuuust above the top of the little dough balls with cream of roasted chicken soup. Baked to completion/safety."
"Overly indulgent and delicious."
A Famous Side
"I consistently make a box of pastaroni angel hair and herbs as a side with meals I prepare for people. EVERYONE always asks for the recipe LOL please don't tell my secret"
Just a Couple Additions
" 'Fancy Ramen' Ramen made normal. Don't mix seasoning. Drain water. Add Mayo. Then mix in seasoning. And Volia. A lot of people question it. Until they try it."
Others outlined the things they eat that combine some ingredients it may seem disgusting to mix together.
Throw An Egg On There
"Fu** it lasagna, alternating layers of bread and shredded cheese (your choice which, I use cheddar) then crack an egg on top and put it in the microwave. Old depression meal, but it still holds up."
Hard to Wrap Your Head Around
"As a kid I would eat a banana with a cheese slice. Haven't tried it in years but it might hold up" -- Send_it_to_me
"Let's not" -- Sea-Entertainer-4974
"When I was younger I would make toast with peanut butter on it, then add pepperoni. Delicious then but I cringe thinking about trying it today"
The truly horrifying thing? There are so many more recipes out there that would leave Ramsay trembling.
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I love food! Maybe a little too much. It's been an especially amorous relationship over this pandemic. And I know I'm not alone.
All of our palettes are tuned to our own personal tastes. And sometimes certain items and combinations of tastes can leave others less than enticed.
I've lost track of all the side-eye I've gotten when I declare how much I enjoy PINEAPPLE on pizza. I said it. I meant it. Fight me. Let's discuss who else has eclectic tastes.
Redditor u/CatVideoFest wanted to discuss the mixing of certain ingredients that don't leave the best taste in one's mouth by asking:
Food is for survival. That was the plan. But over the years it has become somewhat of a way of life. Some of the most annoying people are foodies. They get so uppity about the preferences of others. Like, let me just enjoy what I enjoy.
Mom No!Mom Smile GIFGiphy
"I don't like my mom's cooking."
"Livestock have refused to eat my mother's cooking. She's a terror in the kitchen."
Take them OUT!!
"I hate walnuts in baked goods. It tastes like wood shavings and completely ruins the flavor."
"I love walnuts but I feel this way about raisins in baked goods, raisins are fine by themselves but not in sweets, I once ordered cinnamon rolls at Hardee's and bit into it and found out there were raisins in it, and I was grossed out and didn't want to eat it. At least freakin' McDonald's serves real cinnamon rolls without freakn' raisins!"
The Fart Ingredient
"I don't like kidney beans except in chili."
Oh thew Crunch...
"Pickles and onion make the best sandwich. I make most of my own pickles from stuff I grow or get from local farms in the fall, but I responded to another comment with two different heinous concoctions I enjoy. Crunchy, salty, sour. I really like pickles and onions to begin with."
"I use more than pickled cucumber though. Like the last one I made, I used garlic naan, mayo, red onion, scallions, pickled garlic, green olives, Kalamata olives, garlic dill cucumber, and green beans. Shallot, sour pickled onion, sweet pickled cucumbers, and sushi ginger on sprouted 14 grain bread is also also a favorite of mine."
People Break Down The Best Loophole They've Ever Exploited
No Sizzlebacon GIFGiphy
"I do not like bacon."
Who doesn't like bacon? That seems like a sacrilege. Right? But to each their own. Though I will never understand not loving walnuts in comfort food. Y'all need more self love.
Love the Big M
"Fast food tastes amazing, yeah its unhealthy as hell but don't you sit there and lie and say it tastes bad."
Blasphemy!golden girls flirting GIF by HULUGiphy
"Cheesecake is disgusting."
Too Many Legs
"Lobsters and crabs are giant insects."
"I don't really think that's that controversial, in my area of the world we even call this creature a 'Moreton Bay Bug' even though some fisheries try to give it the more appealing name of 'flathead lobster'."
"Boneless wings are vastly superior to bone-in wings. I think bone-in wings are a ripoff because when you get half a pound of them, part of that half-pound is inedible. It's like if you ordered a quarter-pound cheeseburger, but the restaurant considers the weight of the plate to be part of that quarter-pound and you end up with just a slider. Just give me some damn meat."
The Slimeman oyster GIFGiphy
"Oysters are truly disgusting and absurdly overpriced for quarter sized pieces of snot that tastes like salt water and hot sauce."
Side Dish Bad
"Cheese fries = ruined fries. I don't have a lot of texture issues, but I refuse to eat limp, soggy french fries. No cheese fries, no chili fries, no poutine."
"I don't care for pasta. Around a decade ago, I lost a ton of weight by cutting out carbs (except beer) and after not eating bread or pasta for 3 or 4 years, I still liked some breads but to this day don't like the squishiness of pasta."
Apples?pineapples GIF by gifnewsGiphy
"I do not like pineapple. Period. Not on pizza, not cooked, not by itself, not in juice form. I just do not like pineapple."
"Tomatoes can screw off."
"I don't mind raw tomatoes, for things like salads or sliced in sandwiches. But cooked tomatoes? Get them the fuck away from me. I hate canned tomatoes in, for example, a vegetable soup. When my family fires up our grill, we skewer a bunch of different vegetables. Mushrooms, zucchini, bell peppers..."
"And cherry tomatoes. While all the other veggies get combined onto the same skewers, the tomatoes usually get a skewer of their own just for my sake."
"You could not pay me to eat a banana. The texture, the smell, just everything about it. Won't even drink a smoothie that has a little bit of banana in it—that's all I'd taste."
"I am NOT a picky eater, love every single vegetable and fruits and a huge variety of food. Cannot. Stand. Bananas. They make me gag to even think of them. I truly cannot believe that people actually find bananas edible or even enjoyable to eat. I hate them so much I think everyone is lying about liking them."
"Nutella on pancakes is just plain abomination."
Sick 'n Nasty
"Licorice is absolutely disgusting."
"Yeah it is. I don't understand what child hating sicko decided to invent a candy as superficially inviting as Good n Plenty, knowing that it would contain that rancid excrement on the inside. When I was young and getting a dollar to buy the candy of my choice was a huge deal to me, I once made the mistake of wasting my cash on a box of those rabbit turds."
"I think I remember crying when I bit into a handful of them, because idk what exactly I was expecting... but it wasn't freaking licorice."
PoachedGIF by markoGiphy
"Poached eggs are infinitely inferior to fried or scrambled eggs. I don't want my food or plate contaminated with gross eggy water and I want some crispy variation in the texture."
A Whole Meal Mess
"I may like my steaks medium rare and with nothing but a bit of butter and garlic, but if you want your steak well-done and slathered in ketchup, cool, you do you. Some people prefer different tastes and freak snobs who think if your grilled cheese is American on Wonderbread and isn't made with Asiago and Romano on freshly baked bread, toasted via fireplace, you're not doing it right. Sometimes I like my food how mom used to make... and mom was a crappy cook."
"Food is so much better without cheese. Cheese drowns out all of the other flavors. Take a sandwich for instance. You can really taste the vegetables on a sandwich without cheese. You taste mostly cheese when you add cheese."
"Cheese is the bane of my existence. EVERYTHING comes with cheese when you are at a restaurant these days. I have a very limited number of cheeses I can eat. Things like cheddar, a very popular cheese, give me killer migraines. Stop putting cheese on everything people!"
Ok, I'm trying to stay calm. I don't want to judge. But some of these opinions... are leaving me shook. Except the oysters. That is that work of the devil. Look away...
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Look, unless you enjoy cooking, no one likes spending time in the kitchen longer than they have to in order to whip up something mediocre to eat.
Ordering food or, for the time being, enjoying a socially distanced lunch at an establishment is convenient, but it can take a toll on your wallet.
So what options are there?
Fortunately, there are plenty of them that do not involve nuking a frozen entree.
"What's your go-to under 5 minute meal?"
These dinner selections are super sufficient.
A Loaded Course
"Two hotdogs and a side of judgement from my fiancé"
In Case You Didn't Know
"Quesadilla. super quick and easy to make and there's a ton of ingredients that you can add without much effort that will make it even better."
A Must For Quesadilla
"I like to buy a rotisserie chicken and use it for a lot of things...I probably make Quesadillas 2-3 times a week. A little roast chicken and salsa to your cheese quesadilla and you have a real meal in the same amount of time. The trick is to use butter in the pan and to cook it on medium-low until the insides get melty, and then raise the heat to medium and get your desired tortilla crispness."
"Ramen and an egg, but not the traditional way."
- "Boil roughly half an inch of water (we want just enough water to boil the noodles, with very little water left over when it's done boiling)."
- "Smash up the ramen noodles, while still in the package (optional but cooks MUCH faster)."
- "Open the package and remove the seasoning."
- "Dump the noodles in."
- "While boiling, crack an egg and whisk in a small bowl."
- "Noodles should be done and almost all the water should be gone, if not strain out some.
- Remove from the heat."
- "Slowly pour in the egg while mixing very quickly, try not to let the egg touch the pan."
- "Mix as much of the seasoning packet as you like (I prefer 1/2 - 3/4 because I usually add a salty component at the end.)"
- "Add to bowl and top with some chives, thinly sliced, ripped up ham/salami and/or parsley. Leftover bacon or pancetta are fantastic crunchy components to dial up the texture."
"Easy, fast and checks so many of the 'munchie' boxes for me."
Don't Underestimate Soups
"Tomato soup and add tortellini. I like the spinach ones from Trader Joe's and Progreso creamy tomato with basil. It's bomb and it really makes a decent meal."
People Explain The Worst Thing That's Ever Happened To Them On Their Birthday
Get Your Soups On
"Grilled cheese and tomato soup. Put tomato soup can in pot on low. Add in equal amount of milk to soup(1 can of soup= 1 soup can of milk). Cook grilled cheese as desired and enjoy!"
Microwave Dumpling Soup
"Pick a broth, add (insert Asian dumpling here; mandu are good, but gyoza or wonton work too), add a fistful of fresh greens (spinach, arugula, cabbage, literally whatever you have on hand). Add hot sauce if you want it, a splash of soy if you have it, whatever you like in your broth. Microwave three minutes; beat an egg while you do. Remove the soup from the microwave and drizzle in the egg very slowly. Congrats, you've hit most major dietary requirements and made a satisfying meal that's as filling as you want it to be."
"Peak tier for me is beef broth, a splash of dashi, a splash of soy sauce, a splash of mirin, a big spoon of sambal olek, about four or five mid-sized Chinese beef and vegetable dumplings, a fistful of baby spinach, and an egg. Sometimes you have to microwave again for a minute if the egg ribbons don't set."
Goes Well With Veggies And Cheese
"Hummus is such an underrated food. It goes well with a lot of veggies and breads and chips or heck even cheese. All the time I hear hummus being listed as one of those weird, gross foods when its actually an amazing snack, or a meal if done correctly. It's not really unhealthy, either, especially if eaten with veggies (celery and carrots go great with hummus)."
Must Add Cheese
"Bread (any kind) plus cheese."
"Sometimes just the cheese. I eat the preshredded kind out of the bag at midnight, to hide from my shame."
Ready In Seconds
"All I do is get a paper towel, and put 5 Oreos on it."
"Then go back and get the whole package."
Rice Is Nice
"If you already have rice made and in the fridge: pop the rice in the microwave to heat up (covered, so it doesn't get weird), fried egg, add kimchi = yuuuuuum. The fried egg should be cooked enough that it's still gooey, but not totally runny. ...it's good cold, too. I've totes fried an egg in the morning, assembled my meal, and brought it for lunch. You do have to be careful about where you eat it, tho- not everyone likes the smell of kimchi. Tuna sandwich etiquette applies here!!"
"Edit to add a second one: Oh!! If you cut up half an andouille sausage, brown the slices in a pan while you steam some broccoli (in the microwave), then mix together and top w/a little Parmesan cheese. Suuuuper good."
Peanut Butter Fantasies
"Peanut butter sandwich."
"If I'm feeling extra froggy I'll add nutella to the peanut butter and honey sandwich and put it in the microwave for 30 seconds. Goes down about as well as a popeye's biscuit though."
"It's like cheating the system. You eat sweets and call it healthy."
"Watermelon with Mango. It's fruit sexy time on your tongue, super healthy for you, great pre or post workout/game, takes 2 minutes to make."
Better Than Dip
"Another really good one is mango and avocado cubed, sprinkled with salt and lime. Eat with tortilla chips. Simple and tasty."
Start your day without all the hassle of a fancy breakfast.
Put It In A Bowl
"Oatmeal or cereal."
"Cereal is definitely underrated as a meal outside of the breakfast dynamic."
"A very simple recipe my grandma prepared for me when i was a kid."
"It's basically scrambled eggs...but before adding the egg she would cook sweetcorn (from a can) with a little bit of butter, add the eggs and then when the eggs were almost ready, add small cubes of cheese and cook for a minute or until the cheese start to melt (she was using fontal, but any swiss or white cheddar will do). Just a little black pepper and salt."
"Takes 5 minutes to do but it's absolutely delicious, fill you up, not so unhealthy and I feel my late grandma with me."
'I tried variations with chives or spring onions, paprika or other stuff. Still good but nothing as good as a simple "uova strapazzate con mais e formaggio.'"
I consider yogurt a healthy snack/lunch option.
I like having a bowl of non-fat plain Greek yogurt with raspberries, blueberries, sprinkled with granola and drizzled with honey.
It's packed with nutrients and gives me a nice boost of energy.
Yogurt also makes for a perfect chip dip. I sprinkle some onion soup mix and stir in the mixture. Who knew quick and easy food prep could be so delicious?
Until recently, I did not appreciate cooking until the pandemic hit.
Suddenly – like many others who were self-isolating for much of 2020 – I was forced to prepare my own meals as going to restaurants was not an option and ordering take-out was not economically convenient.
I certainly do not love cooking, but I appreciate the sense of accomplishment the task gives me.
I tend to enjoy the fruits of my labor when they are of the baked good variety. After all, isn't a slice of coffee cake with a gooey, cinnamon-glazed center a reason to get up in the morning? I'll speak for myself. It absolutely is.
However, motivation is my biggest obstacle when it comes to food prep.
Curious to hear about preferred menu options from strangers on the internet, Redditor CodFishGaming asked:
No Prep Time
Some people do not consider this "cooking" per se, but you can't argue over the convenience of adding hot water or nuking your meals.
"When I want to get fancy, I crack an egg in it."
Usually it is a frozen Stouffers Lasagna."
It's Not A Kitchen Without These
"Microwaves are on some next level sh*t. Like these things have been around for decades and they seem like they're from the future. How the f'k you expect me to believe this box on my counter cooks things hotter and faster than a big f'kin metal block that takes up a whole section of counter with the sole purpose of being hot??"
Who Doesn't Love Pasta?
You can have a hearty Italian dish with some basic ingredients every kitchen should have – like pasta and a jar of Prego.
These Redditors even found that making their own sauce was not that difficult. Plus, they could store the leftovers.
"Pasta, a little butter, garlic and some seasonings."
"I make a gallon or so of tomato sauce when I do feel motivated and freeze it, so all I have to do is boil water and microwave a measured serving of sauce for 1 plate."
"Even making the sauce is hardly any work. Throw sh*t in a pot, simmer for 2 hours. Put into tupperware."
Delicious Italian In Minutes
"Toss chunks of onion, peppers, and cherry tomatos, a can of chickpeas and fresh gnocchi in olive oil and whatever spices you want. Then roast them in the oven. Gnocchi get slightly crisped on the sides and roasted veggies are always delicious."
"Takes about 5 minutes (or less really) to prep and maybe 30 min to cook? But very little labor involved, and it's very tasty. I try to plan to have supplies for it if I know I have busy day ahead of me."
Piling On The Carbs
"For other people? Carbonara. It's quick, minimal ingredients and impresses people who don't know anything about cooking. For myself? Microwave a hotdog for 20-30 seconds and wrap a slice of bread round it."
Recipe For Success
These may require more time than desired, but based on these Redditors' preparation descriptions, it doesn't seem like it involves that much effort to get tasty results.
Snacks That Are Meals
"Hummus and pita, boxed pasta (like Annie's white cheese shells), crackers and boursin and jalapeno jelly (sometimes I'll add a little pre-sliced turkey from the package, too). All really simple, basically snacks not meals, but they get the job done and they're so fucking easy to make. They've got it all calories, fill you up, taste pretty good, ready to eat in 11 minutes or less with minimal (if any) effort. It's amazing. I don't love them always but they're good enough (a good salad or something is miles better but who has the time or the energy or the motivation?!)."
"Ground beef with whatever frozen veggies I have, with whatever bottle of sauce/marinade I have with whatever container of spices/herbs I have. Plus a skillet."
"Shredded chicken tacos. Just put some chicken in a crockpot with some seasoning.... 6 hours later you pull it apart and you have dinner."
Stuff The Spuds
"Loaded baked potato: Clean and slice skin of a potato, microwave for 5min on normal 2-3 time fliping in between, potato is done when soft and pliable. If you do prep beforehand this is a lot easier, cook/reheat cubed or sliced ham in a pan (Add chopped onions and garlic for flavor) In another pan (if needed) Steam broccoli."
"Place the cooked potato on a plate, slice in half and mash out and butter. spread broccoli on top of the potato, spread ham on top, spread shredded cheese on top. microwave for 1-2 min to melt the cheese. sourcream on to and enjoy!!"
"I keep packets of cubed ham ready so I can usually cook this up in 15-20 min. wash your pots and pans on the final microwave cooking and you'll just have the plate left at the end."
When it comes to accompanying a main dish, rice plays nice. But sometimes, rice can be the star of the show.
Such is the versatility of this cheap staple food, as these Redditors can attest to.
Just Add Sausage
"I'll just put white rice in the electric cooker and then when the rice is done I'll drop inside the cooker with the rice these chinese sausages for like 5 minutes. When did I cut them in slices serve myself rice and I'll eat that with soy sauce and meal ready. Honestly it's so good."
Fry It Up
"Fried Rice - always make more rice than you need, because refrigerated rice is what you want for this. Garlic, ginger, whatever veggies you have and whatever sauces you have."
Make It Spicy
"Kimchi fried rice assuming I have planned ahead by making the rice the day before."
"Super easy, toss some garlic into the pan, followed by some kimchi, then rice and kimchi juice and soy sauce. I have a simple ground beef topping I make and then fry up a couple eggs and chop up seaweed snacks into strips."
"When it is leftovers all I have to do is fry up two eggs while it heats up in the microwave, then grab some of the chopped up seaweed."
My go-to dish is scrambled eggs, regardless of time of day.
I sprinkle some salt and pepper and cut up some avocado, and I'm comfortably satisfied with a healthy meal.
If I'm feeling adventurous, I heat up some chopped onions and green pepper.
Whatever you decided to whip up, besides motivation, cooking is not that arduous once you have momentum going.
Macaroni and cheese is a timeless institution. Whether it traces its origins to the pastas of Italy or the epicenter of Goulash in modern-day Hungary, it is now here.
It is here, it is everywhere, all ages adore it, and--most importantly--it's full of opportunity.
A recent Reddit thread asked for input from the creative minds of the internet's far reaches. Noodle artists came from far and wide to offer their artistic visions for the basic mac and cheese canvas.
The list came together to offer a wonderful menu of new options for the future of your mac and cheese making. Various meats, spices, preparation methods, and oddball ingredients were all covered.
The thread was an illustration of crowd-sourcing at its finest.
Redditor_2017 asked, "What do you add to enhance Mac and Cheese?"
Necessity Drives Innovation
"Picky eaters in my house have caused much experimentation with this already wonderful meal."
- "Any protein. Sausages, tuna, turkey, and so on."
- "Try adding small amount of other cheeses to the mixing step. Velveeta for cheap. Parmesean for flavor and texture. Try Gouda for smoky. Sure, you could just add more cheddar (mild for additional cheesy flavor, medium for subtle uptick, sharp for a lot more cheesy bang)."
- "Hot sauce. There are endless flavor variations here."
- "I've heard cream corn is good to add, but I'm not that crazy."
Fats and Lipids, Baby
"Bacon and a little tiny bit of truffle oil."
"My friends and I had a mac'n'cheese competition night a few years back. We all made our own versions of loaded mac'n'cheese and everyone + significant others voted on their favorite. These were my favorite additions."
"PS most of the people in my friend group are at least slightly lactose-intolerant, but we persevered."
Covers All the Bases
"I like to combine smoked Gouda + old sharp cheddar + mozzarella. You get the strong flavor, melted stringy cheese goodness and some smoked flavor that is always welcomed." -- moy-moi
"I like sharp cheddar, Parmesan, and goat cheese, plus I replace the butter with mascarpone. Sometimes I add some fresh, finely chopped rosemary, too." -- Rubinev
"Bacon, garlic salt and cayenne pepper." -- GrilledStuffedDragon
"Can interchange bacon with chicken and jalapeño or any peppers will do. The college meal would be hot dogs" -- Shi**yLiftingTips
"garlic salt and pepper automatically make any dish better. it is known" -- Pyrle
Mustard From Out of Nowhere
"Gruyere, paprika, cayenne, ground mustard." -- 01kaj10
"I made this exact mixture the first time I made homemade Mac and cheese. It's delicious. I just threw it all together without any recipe thinking 'this might be good.' "
"If I make boxed Mac and cheese now I always throw in some smoked paprika and fresh ground pepper. It tastes so much better." -- pocketchange2247
"Yes. Also English mustard and mustard seeds. I put mustard seeds in way too many foods" -- Lonelysock2
Ideal Leftover Collaboration
"Mac n cheese and baked brown beans are DELICIOUS together. Nothing fancy, just Kraft and Bush's"
"I also love when the stars align and I have leftover mac n cheese AND leftover taco meat. They are so good mixed together!"
"Chorizo is the best addition I've come across so far, a friend suggested it a little while back and it's quickly become my favorite enhancement!"
"Tuna has also been pretty good, I'll usually put in a can and it mixes in pretty well."
The Right Tools
"Well I'm not sure if this is going to count, but instead of using a stove I use my pellet smoker. If you have a smoker I 100% encourage you to try this!" -- BlueCollarComedyTour
"I will for sure be giving this a try." -- Thechaser45
"Bro, do you smoke?" -- Genocide_Fan
Very Enthusiastic About Bread Crumbs
"BREAD CRUMBS" -- picklesupreme
"Onion powder works pretty well too, plus some freshly grated cheese (as opposed to pre packaged grated cheese)" -- picklesupreme
"Hol' up" -- Crumbs04
All the Food Groups
"Peas. Because peas are awesome and I can lie to myself about now unhealthy my meal really is" -- SaltyChickenDip
"Oh my gosh all the indulgent answers had kind of shamed me out of saying this! So I'm glad there's someone else out there!" -- Manatee3232
"I came here to find somebody else commenting 'peas.' Peas and tuna all the way." -- Niles4Me
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