Parenting is a pretty subjective thing. What works for one family might be something another family finds ridiculous. Generally, we're all out here just trying to keep our kids alive and as happy and healthy as we can.
Generally.
There are some parents who absolutely do NOT fit that mold. Whether it's malicious or not, there are about a zillion examples of trash parenting out there. One Reddit user asked:
What's the worst case of bad parenting you've ever witnessed?
The responses were heartbreaking and infuriating - mostly because there were just so many of them. We gathered a few replies for you here. You read these while we go hug as many kids as we can (with consent, of course. It would be weird otherwise.) Heads up, some of these may be hard to read or triggering for some people. Proceed with caution.
"She Still Came Out..."
When my mom was still living at home with my grandparents they had neighbors who had three kids. An older daughter who was slow/had some mental issues, a son, and another daughter. When she was pregnant with her son she was sitting on the porch downing a beer when another neighbor asked her if that was ok for the baby.
Her response was: "Well, I quit drinking with the first one and she still came out ret*rded".
The whole family pretty much excluded the oldest girl from everything they did
Home Town Hot Mess
I used to know a girl, we will call her Brittany. She had a bad habit of smoking, drinking, and using drugs during her pregnancy but our issues started before that.
Let's go back to before anyone knew she was pregnant.
I used to hang out with her crowd quite a bit. Brittany was being really pushy to people all night at one particular New Year's Eve party. I was pretty drunk and just trying to avoid her.... She kept telling me how tough she was and could take a punch to the gut from anyone. She kept pushing me and telling me she wasn't going to stop until I punched her. She kept cornering me, pushing me, hitting me.
I was weak. After a long time, I caved and hit her in the gut. Not very hard, but hard enough.. I'm still not proud of it, I should have left her alone.
She buckled and ended up crying on the couch. I was already mortified that I had broken down and actually hit her. I should have withstood her constant goading and regretted it immediately. I tried to comfort her and that's when she says.
"I'm pregnant."
What. The. F*ck. So this chick knew she was pregnant and kept cornering people to get them to punch her in the stomach!?!?
I talked to her for a bit after I hit her, trying to comfort her. Despite the rage boiling up in me, I calmed her down and sent her back up to the party. I left and walked home. It was several miles, but worth walking to get away from her.
Now fast forward 1 year from the New Years Eve incident. I haven't spoken to her since. But she posted on Facebook that her (almost year old) baby hasn't been developing normally after going to the doctors.
She wrote on Facebook: "I hope the guy that beat me while I was pregnant can live with himself."
Are you kidding me? I'm sure it had nothing to do with you drinking, smoking cigs and weed? Also, people said they had seen her on acid, but I can't confirm that.
I blocked her on Facebook.
Then fast forward about 2 weeks. It's a small town, things spread. I feel like everywhere I go I am getting weird looks. I ignore it. Then, I go to a bar and she is there. I decide to ignore her and go sit by best friend who is by the bar.
The people she is with come over to me, I am honestly confused as hell at this point. They tell me I need to go. The conversation goes something like this:
Me - "uhhh... what?"
Them - "You need to get out of here now."
Me - "Why?"
Them - "You f*cking get out now before I take you outside and make you bite that damn curb."
To make this story short, this girl turned a large portion of the town against me.
I moved, went back to college, got engaged, got a good job. Am doing fine now. But I HATE going back to my hometown. Absolutely hate it. I take my fiance back and she doesn't understand why I never want to go to any of the bars there.
That girl messed me up with her crazy weirdo bad parenting.
A Firefighter's Tale
I've been a Firefighter for almost 20 years, so I've seen a lot of bad stuff happen to a lot of innocent people - but the bad parent that comes to mind wasn't one that was trying to be a bad parent, they just made a really dumb decision and it ended up killing their child.
It was summer, late afternoon, and we were sent for a "person struck by a vehicle." When we arrived, the patient, a 24-ish year old male, was on the ground in the middle of a large apartment complex access road, and he was being restrained by the ambulance crew.
He had an altered level of consciousness (only responded to painful stimuli), his pupils were blown (or one was dilated and the other pinpoint, I can't remember), and he was combative as hell. He also had blood coming out of both ears, and when we used a 4 X 4 bandage to collect the blood, it showed it contained cerebral spinal fluid.
NOT GOOD SIGNS AT ALL.
As we jumped in to help the ambulance crew, I checked the car nearby for damage and found none. There was an older lady, maybe late 40's, standing next to the vehicle while she was being questioned by a police officer on the scene. Long story short, the patient started crashing fast. He was rushed to the hospital where we later learned he died.
The police officer came over as we were cleaning up the scene and asked "Did you hear what happened?"
Apparently the patient was the woman's son. She was leaving to go to the liquor store and had refused to buy her son beer. He got upset and jumped on her car, laughing, and said something like:
"You're taking me there even if I have to ride out here."
Then, according to her statement, she took off, gradually building up speed. He managed to climb from the hood to the roof where he was laying on his belly, screaming for her to stop, while holding on to the front windshield. She estimated she was going 30 to 40 mph when she slammed on the brakes, shooting him headfirst into the road, killing her son. She apparently couldn't understand that slamming on the breaks like that would stop the car, but not stop him
- IFDRizz
Ditching The Daughter
We offered to rent a room to a buddy of ours while he was going through his divorce. I walked into the kitchen to find his daughter (7 years old) asking me to feed her because she's hungry. I was the only other person home, so I fed her and called him to see where the hell he was at. He was at the bar... He left his daughter at home, told no one.
The divorce was due to adultery, they've both caught each other a few times and I guess they finally decided to end it. I didn't know the kind of guy he really was, I always had the impression that it was his wife who was holding his family back but it turns out it takes two to tango. He wasn't at the bar getting drunk. He was there chasing the bartender who he later moved into the house without even asking - while jobless and living rent free. The guy was a real POS, and the list of things could just go on and on.
While I do not believe their daughters physical well-being is in jeopardy, she is not being raised in a structured environment and her education is very much on their back burner. Unfortunately giving your child little to no hope for their future is not a crime and there's nothing we can do about that.
- okekai
Lots of Snow, No Patience
Couple of weeks ago during a huge snowstorm in Montreal I heard a kid crying, probably 9 at night. Look through the window and there's a toddler in a snowsuit trying to trudge through the snow and bawling while his dad was yelling at him to hurry up, then said all his Christmas presents were going in the garbage.
The dad just walked away and left the kid standing there sobbing before coming back and hauling him over his shoulder. Bleh.
- nkbee
Clear Favorites
I rented a room from a family when I was at college. They were always really harsh with their teenage daughter and super adoring with her older brother.
I had to ask the dad to get rid of the signal jammer they had secretly installed to stop the daughter from being on her phone because I couldn't use my computer or phone (it randomly would kill the wifi signal). What really took the cake was the several hours (3+) that the mother spent yelling at the daughter one day.
It was like she was going through a book of "sh*t not to say to your teenage daughter" and said every thing in there. "You look like a hooker the way you put on your makeup", "you'll never amount to anything", "why can't you be more like your brother", you are fat, stupid, useless, ugly etc. Mom was just totally laying on her. The mother would yell and complain about pretty much anything the daughter did but that was really too far.
This was over ten years ago. I looked for her on Facebook and she's married with a kid and seems happy. It's worth noting she's not connected to her parents on social media.
- ZaMiLoD
Tied Up Like A Dog
When working in a box store about 10 years ago, a customer reported to me that they found a kid tied to a clothing rack. The mother had used her child leash to tie up her kid in an isolated corner while she shopped. We untied the kid, took him to my manager, and promptly called the cops.
Little Litterbug
I was going to pickup take out food around after school time. There was a lady and a small boy around 5-6 standing by the parking lot. The boy was drinking a Coke, when then he turned and tossed it about 15 ft over by a tree. He looked at me, so I said:
"Are you just going to leave that there?"
His mother whipped around and asked me if I was talking to her son. I replied that I was asking him if it was his intention to leave his litter by the tree. She went off about not talking to her child. There was a back and forth for about 15 seconds. Meanwhile the boy realizing he was wrong went to go pick up the can. The mom firmly told him no, but he said it's OK and walked over picked up the can and walked back to his mom.
She snatched it out of his hand and promptly threw it back by the tree. Stared me down and dragged the boy across the street.
Even the kid knew his mother was in the wrong.
"The Coolest"
Knew a guy in high school whose mom f*cked one of his friends after getting too drunk one night. She also taught him that: "It's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission."
He would have to pick her up from bars from the age of 13 because she was too smashed to drive herself home. Back then I thought she was the coolest, looking back I realized that she was just a terrible mother and a pretty horrible person overall.
She Deserves A Real Adult
Last night I spent two hours in the hospital with a 14 year old girl that tried to kill herself because I know both of her parents are f*ck-ups and couldn't be there for one sh*tty reason or another. But I was there, because she needed someone.
Her mom is a drunk 24/7 and works second shift, hasn't been there as a parent in years, the Dad is on the run from the law and not allowed in the state she lives in. She is one of the smartest and coolest kids ever, it shouldn't have to come to this for her. She deserves a real adult, an actual functioning person in her life.
I think Daddy needs to feel the leather.
I mean, I saw the autopsy report of a 4 year old who was beaten to death with a belt by his father... I'd say that ranks up there.
Humanity is dead!
This young kid (8) would turn up to school with obvious signs of abuse. One day he turned up and his tongue was sticking out of his mouth and his head shaking/bobbing back and forth from brain injury from the beating he got at home and the school just thought he was wrongly medicated. He would always have bruises all over him and lumps on his skull and no one questioned it!! It was a case of severe negligence, not only by his parents, but by the school and everyone who saw the boy. Someone apparently took him to hospital a few times (was it his grandmother or something?) and the hospital staff just brushed it off as "boys will be boys," play type bruises and said maybe he was wrongly medicated (for ADHD). The boy always said "he didn't remember" when people asked him how he hurt himself, turning up with new bruises and cuts every day.
Everyone just said he was clumsy because of ADHD. When he was at his worst - when his head was bobbing back and forth, bruises all over his body, the step father filmed him and showed his colleagues a video of the kid laughing and saying "look at what a wanker he is!!"
Two days later the kid could not even talk and was vomiting all over the place. He fell asleep that night and according to the step father, he went to check on him and he apparently died in his arms or some crap...
The ambulance came and found the kid strangled to death, with bits of paper shoved up his nose. The step father had also waited two hours or something to call the ambulance after he dies. But still claimed to be innocent. When asked about all the bruises everyone just said they didn't know.. Such a f**ked case.
The mother also denied everything and protected her boyfriend. After the step father was convicted, he trashed the grave/burial site of the kid and kicked the tomb stone over etc. This happened EVERY time he got out on parole while waiting for prison time. He denied trashing the grave and denied killing him, but the evidence was overwhelming. The grave just suddenly gets trashed the ONE day you have parole? He also said "the little boy is still f**king up our lives even after he's dead."
How much of an a**hole can you possibly be? 8 years old and neglected by the world. The worst part (perhaps) is that they have two new kids together today. Like ...... cringe. The mother has been interviewed after the case and even in the interviews, she's more pissed at her boyfriend having to be in prison then about the son she lost.
Some parents need a hard smack.
Wife's friend has two kids and a milquetoast husband. Went to the diner where the kids were allowed to climb on furniture, run around and eat as much as they wanted. The boy proceeded to vomit all over the floor a few tables away and ruined some other couple's meal. The parents ignored all of this. Made no effort to correct the kid or even clean up the mess. So much rage. I held it in and calmly informed the wife later that I would not subject myself to their company again. The next time they came to visit my wife, I made damn sure I was working.
Haven't seen them since.
You're a winner lady! Not in the good way!
I know a mother that lets her son basically walk all over her. He yells at her, swears at her, calls her a b**ch to her face, and she always just says yes to him. It is really kinda sad.
My previous downstairs neighbor was a large family, and the youngest kid was like 6 or 7, and 24/7 would be running around stomping his feet, screaming at the top of his lungs, the parents never did anything. What really set it off, is when at about 2am, he turned on the gas on the stove, and then went to bed. I woke up, smelled the gas, and had called the fire department, grabbed my most important stuff (safe of important papers, and my case with my rackmount audio gear, laptop, and studio monitors inn it) and ran outside. After everything is all over with, about 5:30 am, I had class at 8 am, and the mother comes to me yelling at me about calling the fire department.
I have seen a lot of bad parents, but that takes the cake in my opinion.
Kids are not pawns...
Heroine addicts begging at the traffic signal carrying their infants would pinch the child to make it cry louder and tell stories of how they haven't eaten in days and lots of people pay them. They earn enough to keep themselves alive and score their next fix. People have started handing them food instead of money to counter such practices but they still manage to earn enough for their drug expenditure.
You maybe out too early...
I used to work in Gamestation (now known as part of Game in the UK) and I had two scummy parents were at the counter buying a 2nd hand PS2. They had a cute little girl with them maybe 6yrs old or so?
Anyway while they were paying for the console the little girl was tugging on the father's coat because she's picked up some crappy kids game and wants it. After some persistent tugging the dad turns to the kid and yells, "FFS, I'M JUST OUT THE JAIL CAN I NOT HAVE ANYTHING FOR MYSELF?" and shoves the kid out the way.
I was amazed.
- Prawnjoe
Poor babies...
My wife's friend had twins the same time as we had our son. They are all 3 years old, 4 in a few months, but you'd think her twins are autistic. They can barely say their names whilst all the other parents in the community can have full conversations with their 3 year olds.
We had a chat with them because they were feeling down about how much more advanced other children were.
Long story short, we find out that they refuse to teach their kids anything. They figure since they pay for daycare that it's day cares job to raise and teach their children. They strongly refuse too. The father said "I'm not teaching my children f**k all, what are those daycare workers paid for. Lazy f**ks!"
On top of that he's a huge pot smoker and smokes a pack a day. We went to their place to find out "he only smokes in the bathroom," the entire place smelt of dope and cigarette and was smoggy.
He genuinely thought he was a good human being for only doing it in the bathroom lol, sigh. Those poor kids.
- Awsm_Guy
HOW IS BREEDING LEGAL FOR EVERYONE?!!
My boyfriend's cousin once went on about how nice his 5 year old daughter's a** was.
A** not butt or bum or anything like that, even though that would still be borderline not ok.
He had her young and is obsessed with "getting pu**y." His number one concern when looking for a future girlfriend is that she's as good looking as him.
Dad to the rescue.
I went to go drop my three year old off with her mom. Her mom was in a hurry so she asked me to put our daughter directly into her carseat in her car. When I did I noticed that the car seat was just resting on the seat. Literally not buckled in at all.
I calmly tell her that the seat isn't hooked up. She says it's too hard for her to buckle up. Okay... no biggie. They can be a pain to tighten properly. So I buckle it up like it is supposed to be. After a few minutes I have it nice and tight but it is ever so slightly canted because her seat is old and worn.
This whole time she is getting frustrated because it is taking too long. When I finish she sees that it is slightly crooked and gets pissed because "people will think she's a bad mom" and proceeds to push me out of the way and unbuckle it. Then she loads our daughter into it and speeds away with the car seat literally just resting on the seat.
I guess to some people appearances matter more than safety. I followed her and called the police. Then she tried to say I was stalking her to the police... who saw right through her bull.
Edit: A lot of people are asking if I tried to take custody from her after this. No I didn't- custody was already settled with each of us having her for half of the week. Truth be told she's not a bad mom- she was just really bad in this moment. looking at the bigger picture it wouldn't have been in my daughter's best interest to try and take custody because of this one misjudgment. The ticket, embarrassment and understanding that this is not acceptable behavior was enough.
Who did your homework?
I'm a teacher. There's a very subtle "bad parenting technique" that I see on a daily basis. It's parents covering for their student's mistakes. I have parents email me regularly to find out what the homework is. I have parents literally come to the school and turn in work for their students. I've had parents schedule meetings with the administration to dispute a student's exam grade (on a multiple choice test). While this may help a student's grade for a week, it cripples any future that he or she might have. Many of my students cannot rely on themselves or their own faculties to complete an assignment. They absolutely must have parental support. It makes me very worried for their college-career-life readiness.
Knowing how to comfort someone is a skill that not everybody has. In fact, some of us outright suck at it.
It doesn't make you a bad person - maybe you're awkward under pressure, or uncomfortable, or didn't have healthy models of empathy. Maybe you just panic and don't know what to do.
Thanks, Teach!
<p>"So, have they found someone new yet?"</p><p>One of my parents died. My parents had been married twenty-five years. A teacher asked me this question five months after the funeral.</p><p>She later told my surviving parent that my depression was because I had to share a room sometimes with a sibling. Not because of my dead parent.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l4r2xg/whats_the_worst_way_someone_has_tried_to_comfort/gkpycyo?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">wzzz11124</a></p>A Music Career
<p>At my boyfriend's funeral a girl he went to high school with came up to me and tried to comfort me by saying she knew "exactly" how I was feeling because she was in love with him too. </p><p>They never dated, they weren't even friends after graduating high school. </p><p>Now she's made a music career from writing sad love songs about him that make it sound like they were together.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l4r2xg/whats_the_worst_way_someone_has_tried_to_comfort/gkqc9vi?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">h3llbaby-ri</a></p>Happy Birthday!
<img lazy-loadable="true" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTU0MTkwNi9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY1ODUyODIyMn0.KCvddvC-hOTRNU4I2h9XB4EiNJbqtIb6tUIVycrcrcs/img.gif?width=980" id="92b5a" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="64cf90889116269bc1889f71eb3e6b8d" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" data-width="480" data-height="400" />Episode 4 Birthday GIF by FriendsGiphy<p>A few years ago, I caught pneumonia, and a stomach virus at the same time. Needless to say, I was really really sick. I was in the hospital for 9 days, and one of those days happened to be my 27th birthday. </p><p>One of my aunts that I don't really know was in town, and wanted to come visit. When she got there, she gave me a card for my birthday, which was nice, but when I read it, it said "since this looks like it'll be your last birthday, I'll say my goodbyes now LOL".</p><p>Now, I'm all for dark humor, but at that point I'd already lost 14 pounds from throwing up, I had a 104 degree fever for multiple days, I was delirious and hallucinating, and hadn't slept in days. I was in legitimate fear that I was actually going to die. </p><p>Told my mom after I was better that I didn't want to see that aunt ever again.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l4r2xg/whats_the_worst_way_someone_has_tried_to_comfort/gkq388v?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">floridas_lostboy</a></p>The Original Owner Of The Book
<p>People say and do some weird sh*t in attempts to comfort others. Myself included. </p><p>But the biggest stand out was when my mother was first diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer (she is doing great now). She received a second hand book called <em>Cooking and Coping with Cancer</em>. </p><p>The original owner of the book didn't need it anymore ... because he died of cancer. So his wife thought my mom would like it. </p><p>The intention was kind, but it was just a bit depressing.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l4r2xg/whats_the_worst_way_someone_has_tried_to_comfort/gkq1o5i?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">theWildBore</a></p>Prosperity Gospel
<p>When I had my first miscarriage, husband and I were attending a Word of Faith type church.</p><p>Their words of "encouragement" were that our baby had died because of some hidden/un-repent sin in my life + my faith wasn't strong enough, and I should just keep praying.</p><p>You would think that a church of all places would embrace you in your suffering and loss. These guys (& gals..) just kind of out-casted us like we would bring them bad luck. </p><p>It was a weird time, and after that I found it hard to hang out with any of them or believe most of what they were teaching.</p><p>We went on to have a healthy little girl and found a much less toxic church, but to this day if anyone mentions the prosperity gospel to me I have a lot of things to say.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l4r2xg/whats_the_worst_way_someone_has_tried_to_comfort/gkqn5h6?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">kannakantplay</a></p>No Dogs Go To Heaven
<img lazy-loadable="true" data-runner-src="https://assets.rebelmouse.io/eyJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiIsInR5cCI6IkpXVCJ9.eyJpbWFnZSI6Imh0dHBzOi8vYXNzZXRzLnJibC5tcy8yNTU0MTkwMy9vcmlnaW4uZ2lmIiwiZXhwaXJlc19hdCI6MTY0MjgwMjM4Mn0.AuV3wZdpHdnZSjeGtJK2DWK_hr8pygOYakH_V79ykXE/img.gif?width=980" id="1965e" class="rm-shortcode" data-rm-shortcode-id="48868a6f58dfdb14fca6a48cd28e590a" data-rm-shortcode-name="rebelmouse-image" data-width="245" data-height="138" />don bluth 80s GIFGiphy<p>My wife and I got a dog back before we were married. GREAT dog. Wonderful animal. Very much our first child.</p><p>Fast forward a few years and our sweet girl had to be put to sleep. I was at work and upset about it. I couldn't stop leaking a little just thinking about her. My very Catholic friend told me that, if it was any comfort, dogs don't have souls.</p><p>WTF?</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l4r2xg/whats_the_worst_way_someone_has_tried_to_comfort/gkqvpv5?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">edgarpickle</a></p>Panic And Dog Food
<p>I was this person unfortunately. I don't react well with sudden bad news and often say the first thing that comes to my mind out of sheer panic.</p><p>I went to get my hair cut in college and as I sat down the small talk started. She asked how things have been blah blah blah. I asked how she had been (it was our first time meeting) and she says "my dog just died." </p><p>Immediately the alarms are going off in my head, a man is running around my brain blasting a whistle trying to figure out my next step.</p><p>"At least you'll save a ton of money on dog food now."</p><p>No... Please no! </p><p>Unfortunately it was already said, everyone stopped what they were doing immediately, you could hear a pin drop. She just continued cutting my hair for what was the quietest haircut I've ever got. I couldn't even apologize I felt so bad and so awkward. </p><p>I just shut my damn mouth and looked straight ahead while hoping I still had both my ears by the time I left.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l4r2xg/whats_the_worst_way_someone_has_tried_to_comfort/gkqa7go?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">OriginsOfSymmetry</a></p>"That's What Drug Addicts Do"
<p>My cousin died of a drug overdose, my father called me to tell me the news. </p><p>After I got off the phone, visibly upset, I told my husband (now ex) what had happened. He said: <br>"Well what did you expect to happen? That's what drug addicts do, they die. And he did it to himself, there is no reason for you to shed a tear, get over it." </p><p>then went back to playing video games. </p><p>I didn't even know what to say to that, and just went to the other room to mourn by myself. It was an abusive situation and I am still in the process of getting divorced 2.5 years later.</p><p>- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/l4r2xg/whats_the_worst_way_someone_has_tried_to_comfort/gkqvivj?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Lil-one</a></p>How NOT To Treat A Phobia
<p>I used to have a phobia of scarecrows that began when I had a repeating nightmare where I would be chased by one in a dark cornfield. </p><p>A girlfriend I had in high school invited me along on a youth group trip. She didn't tell me much except we were going to a camp the next state over and would be doing things like going to an apple orchard. </p><p>The first full day, we all get on the bus, and she tells me that we were going to a corn maze. She hid this from me as she thought it would help with my phobia given she'd be with me and it was day time... I dumbly agreed and made it through the maze while white-knuckling her hand the whole time. </p><p>When we got out, I asked how much longer we'd be at the maze... that's when she told me about how it turns into a haunted corn maze at night... anyone want to take a guess at what the actors were dressed as...</p>People Break Down The Exact Moment They Realized They Were Being Manipulated By Someone They Trusted
Manipulation is designed to be stealthy. We hardly recognize it when it's happening to us because our abuser has forced it to appear under wraps.
But when we recognize it for what it really is, we really feel like we've been smacked across the face. There is no other descriptor for it. Usually we've trusted and loved those that manipulated us.
A Platitude Of Pleasing
<p>You never know where the next blowout is coming from. Any time something needs to be addressed, you might try to bring it up once, gently, if you're feeling brave. If you meet the slightest bit of resistance, or you don't feel like that fight in the first place, you just go "okay dear" instead. You find that you'll put the argument off until next time, and hope that whatever you thought to bring up won't have any consequences, because you'll be hearing about those, too. It sucks, and I'm glad you can speak about it in the past tense.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/TheGreatestAuk/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">TheGreatestAuk</a></p>Wrong Or Right Or Just Not Agreeing?
<p>When I started realizing that I was feeling like I was constantly walking on eggshells. I never knew which version of my friend I'd get when we saw each other, or when we hung out. I also just completely stopped disagreeing with them because I didn't want to hear them tell me how wrong I was if we didn't share the same viewpoint.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/WhatArcherWhat/" target="_blank">WhatArcherWhat</a></p>Being Used
<p>My best friend suddenly distanced herself from me. But every now and then she'd call and ask if I wanted to do something, and I was encouraged because I thought it meant that things were still good between us. It took me an embarrassingly long time to realize that she only called when she wanted to do something that required a ride, since she didn't have a car. The only thing I can say in my defense is that I don't use people that way so I didn't recognize user behavior. You can bet I do now.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Goldeverywhere/" target="_blank">Goldeverywhere</a></p>Hiding The Receipts
<p>I was living with my former best friend and his gf at the time. When I asked for grocery receipts (I trusted him & his ex to buy groceries bc I didn't have a car at the time + our work schedules were different so I couldn't go with them) and they wouldn't provide any. The only reason I became suspicious was bc they started asking for a ridiculous amount of money for my half and the actual amount of food wasn't adding up. Up until that point they never asked for a crazy amount and I was content with our groceries, but I noticed they became extremely greedy. When I then asked to see a banking statement, they wouldn't even provide me with that either.</p><p>At that point I just realized they were finessing me out of extra money and I started buying my own food. I just bit my tongue bc we only had like 2 months left on the lease. They tried to gaslight me and make me seem like the bad guy any chance they had (almost the entire time I lived with them actually). Eventually, I grew apart from him once I moved away and the only reason he hit me back up was bc she cheated on him so he probably didn't have anyone else to turn to (go figure). We don't talk anymore.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/0MG1MW3T/" target="_blank">0MG1MW3T</a></p>Ah Yes, Good Old DARVO
<p>My mother and I have always had a rocky relationship. She's always encouraged me to tell her what's wrong, however, any time I would she'd immediately go "sorry I'm such a terrible mother, I give you everything you want and it's still not good enough! Why don't you just go live with someone you don't hate?" Keep in mind this happens over small things such as "mom, I'd appreciate it if you'd knock before coming into my room. You know how easily I startle and you barging into my room really upsets me"</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/paytonc0510/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">paytonc0510</a></p>How Do You Do This To Someone
<p>8 years into the relationship. As we're sitting down he explains to me that the "first couple years" we were together he only saw me as a place to crash and free rides, but he loved me NOW, and even though I accomplished all the goals HE set for ME so we could get married he said "I never really thought you could do it". Oh and also you got fat, but don't worry we can fix it! It was like a magic veil lifted and I finally saw who he really was. F**k you James.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/DoNotUseOnHumans/" target="_blank">DoNotUseOnHumans</a></p>Be My Friend And Not Theirs
<p>She always managed to make me do things I didn't really want to do but the last straw was when she decided I had to stop being friends with two mates of mine over something stupid that offended her. </p><p>Cut her off over that and she then proceeded to act derisively ("you'll come back"), then badmouthed me and then begged me to take her back. Ten years later I am still friends with those two guys and she's still out of my life.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/FatherTedHackett/" target="_blank">FatherTedHackett</a></p>Victim Time
<p>When literally every time me and my mom talked she played the victim.</p><p>I was trying to help her raise me, ask me about my grades and stuff. For her I just existed, she wasn't responsible at all.</p><p>I grew up watching her play the victim to others, and I was always on her side, cuz she's my mom you know. Also I never really understood what was going on.</p><p>I started getting older and older, and seeing sh*t after sh*t she did. I understood what she did to my father, to my step-dad, to my sister, to her friends.</p><p>Probably I'd be the next one who she would use and throw away.</p><p>I talked to her... and you know the result. The victim. Nothing it's her fault.</p><p>The last time we talked, I was expecting the victim card. When she started speaking, I already knew what was going to happen. I didn't even said a word, I just agreed with her, and the next day I moved out. I'm not wasting my time.</p><p>It was the last day before quarantine, I remember it as if it was yesterday. Friday night: saturday morning I was packing my stuff.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/NotFromHeel/" target="_blank">NotFromHeel</a></p>Sixteen Years Of Made Up Lies
<p>After 16 years of marriage I realized my now ex was manipulating me. I would work and take care of the house and if I asked him to do something like get a job or clean up he would stage a mental breakdown and make me feel bad for asking him for help. </p><p>He would play up a horrible childhood or PTSD from the military to make me feel like I need to take care of him. Then would play on his computer all day and smoke while I worked. </p><p>Found out that a lot of his horrible childhood stories were made up and that he never made it through basic training in the military. I am happily with someone now but still catch myself cringing when he does things like cook or clean thinking that he is going to yell at me for being lazy. Meanwhile he loves me and is just doing things to take care of me. I'm working on deprogramming myself.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/HolyCelestialCow/" target="_blank">HolyCelestialCow</a></p>Sometimes It's The Mother-In-Law
<p>Took me until after the engagement to realize that my cheating ex fiancee was trying to browbeat me into submission.</p><p>Anywho, I quickly recognized emotional blackmail and manipulation from my MIL after getting married to a different girl years later due to that experience. I called her out on it.</p><p>She... Doesn't like that. But since my wife and sister-in-law and brother-in-law also recognize it they've got my back.</p><p><a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/engineertr1gg/" target="_blank">engineertr1gg</a></p>Just as new mothers encounter the sudden, influential developments of powerful hormone changes, protective instincts, and milk production, so new fathers undergo some key changes of their own.
Their socks become exclusively white, climbing higher up the calf than ever before. All their shorts sprout cargo pockets and clunky belt loop cell phone holders. They start to really lean in to their old records.
Regional Laws
<p>"Dad, driving past a cemetery: Did you know anyone living in a 3 mile radius of a cemetery isn't allowed to be buried there?"</p><p>"Me: No, I had no idea. How come?"</p><p>"Dad: Yeah, you're not allowed to bury the living"</p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjk1d2k?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">TinyLuckDragon</a></p>For the Face Plant Image
<p>"Why do Scuba Divers fall backwards off a boat?"</p><p>"Because if they fell frontwards they'd still be on the boat" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjjv4mt?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">hatsnatcher23</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Just told this one to my bf and he still has his face in his hands" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjka0w7?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">sxeoompaloompa</a></p>A Mammal of Few Words
<p>"What did the father buffalo say when his child left for school?"</p><p>"Bison" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjjp257?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">TatooineLight</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"LOL" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjjp9p0?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">BennuH</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Told this to my brother, he laughed his a** off." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjk4cvq?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Type10Civilization</a></p>Baggage
<p>"When I do home improvements I always use my step ladder"</p><p>"I never knew my real ladder" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjjlkab?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">DavosLostFingers</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Whoever took the ladder, please return it or further steps will be taken." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjm2htz?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">WaldhornNate</a></p>Woah Woah Woah, We're in Public
<p>"Me: I'm not very hungry, I just want something easy"</p><p>"Server: maybe the chicken strips for $6"</p><p>"Me: maybe it does, but that doesn't help my hunger" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjjuq78?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">mcnoobs_</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"My husband was facepalming for solid 8 minutes after I read that joke to him." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjnee7m?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Madanax</a></p>Not Wrong
<p>"Two dudes were on a boat with a few cigarettes, but they didn't have anything to light them, so they threw one of the cigarettes out of the boat, and the boat became a cigarette lighter." </p><p>-- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjjkeoz?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">OrangeMirrorJuice</a></p>Watch the News Before Saying This One
<p>"Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?"</p><p>"It's okay, they eventually woke up."</p><p>"I cringe every time." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjk0ej7?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">unicorndreamz94</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"My 10 year old tried this one a few weeks ago. Unfortunately, I had just read news about a missing local girl. 'So I answered that yes I heard about the missing girl' Scared the sh** out of my 10 year old" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjo3ssv?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">Aubear11885</a></p>Got a Million of Em
<p>"What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fshhhh."</p><p>"I'm sorry but I'm about to say something tasteless. Water."</p><p>"I got fired from my job at the calendar factory. I took a day off."</p><p>"Unfortunately though, I can't really tell these jokes since I'm not a dad. I'm a faux pa."</p><p> -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjk9igl?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">WholeGrainMustard</a></p>G-Pa With the Physics Humor
<p>"Why does the movie "speed" have no director?"</p><p>"If it had direction, it'd be called velocity!"</p><p>"-my grandpa, earlier today" -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjk4wdo?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">ConceptUpset4681</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"That's better than a regular dad joke. It's a grand dad joke." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjkuc30?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">VaultBoy9</a></p>A Surprising Amount of Elevator Humor
<p>"I have a joke about elevators."</p><p>"It works on so many levels......." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjk1lrv?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">M0ntgomatron</a></p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"Did you hear about the corruption at the elevator company?"</p><p style="margin-left: 20px;">"It went all the way to the top." -- <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/kyz64a/whats_the_best_dad_joke_you_know/gjkyjrp?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3" target="_blank">RandomName222222222</a></p>Cleaning up is hard enough when it's just clearing a month of dust bunnies. Can you imagine cleaning the debris left by murder, suicide and violence? I have a really great friend who used to do crime scene clean-up for a living. The pay is incredible; it starts at $55 an hour. But there is a much higher cost in mental well being. Death affects you in ways you don't always feel immediately. My friend has stories of nightmares, depression and pain after leaving scenes of horror. Why make all that money just to spend it on therapy? It takes a certain type of person.
***TRIGGER WARNING. CONTENTS ARE SENSITIVE ***
Redditor u/MemegodDave wanted to hear from the people who have the stomach to come in after crime and tragedyto try to bring back some form of normalcy to the location by asking... People who make their living out of cleaning murder scenes, accidents and the like, what is the worst thing you have experienced in your career?