Betty White could have done it.
According to Norse mythology ONLY Thor could lift it because ONLY he was strong enough—and he needed a magical belt and magic gauntlets on top of his already-god-level-super strength.
Marvel went a different route and decided that an ability to lift Thor's hammer would be based on worth instead.
Reddit user gageames17 asked:
"If Thor’s hammer (mjolnir) was a real weapon, who do you think would be worthy enough to wield the hammer?"
The problem is that "worthy" is such a vague and nebulous term, ya know?
It really depends on how you look at it—and we're going to be doing a lot of looking at some "interesting" candidates.
Buckle up, buttercup, because we're going in.
Starting With The Obvious
"Thor."
- saello
"I'm always disappointed when anyone else wields it. I feel like it weakens the value of Thor; it feels like a cheap comic book move."
"In my mind I like to think Thor is the only one worthy and it gives him that special allure."
- TheRavenSayeth
"You only have to be 'worthy' or pure of heart or whatever if you're going by the Marvel comics interpretation of Thor. Worthiness and being pure of heart have nothing to do with wielding the hammer in Norse mythology."
"Thor was able to wield the hammer because he had an incredible amount of strength and a magic belt that made him even stronger."
- Jaycoht
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Some Rando
"It would be some random dude. To be known requires you have to do some sh*tty things every now and then."
- Esoteriss
"Agreed."
"In Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy, the only qualified person to rule the universe is the person who doesn’t want to, and ends up being a dude in a shack. Probably the same thing here."
- Bobski72
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Betty - Obviously
"Betty White would have been able to."
- [Reddit]
"Truly this is the answer I came for."
- dracona
"Me too."
- the_storm_eye
"You have to be willing to kill in order to lift it. I'm just sayin, we all saw that Snickers commercial right?"
- [Reddit]
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Steve
"Steve Irwin, no question."
- ThereCastle
"Yes. Correct."
"Protector of innocent animals but also, unlike most of the other good hearted but non-badass candidates presented, arguably had the biggest balls in human history."
- devilthedankdawg
"Steve Irwin was scary strong and athletic."
"I remember a clip where he just…. runs up a tree. The show doesn’t make a big deal of it, but Steve just runs up this tree and is suddenly up there like it’s no big deal!"
"Most people can’t do that."
- Deradius
"I advocate not for Steve Irwin himself, but for this one Cassowary Steve was running from in a clip I saw."
"Any animal that Steve won't f*ck with is an instant god lmao."
- Draclin
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Papa
"My papa for sure ❤️"
"Just for some context as to how amazing and pure my Papa is, when he was 17 he got hit by a semi and broke every bone in his body. Like totally shattered his cranium to his pinky toe."
"He died multiple times, and somehow they brought him back. And despite that he went on to graduate high school at the age of 21, after re-learning everything. And I don’t just mean school stuff, I mean how to walk, how to talk, how to feed himself, how to go to the bathroom, everything."
"He met my grandma, and they have been married for over 50 years."
"Even though he has had multiple strokes, he’s supposed to be in a wheelchair that he absolutely refuses to use, refuses to use a walker, has to wear a leg brace, despite all of that he still sings at his church, mows the church yard for free, helps everybody he possibly can, and is just the most giving, humble, kind man in the world."
"While I am not a Christian, his faith to me is totally beautiful and inspiring. He never has a bad thing to say about anybody. And I’m pretty sure he would be worthy of Thor's hammer, 100%."
- potatoesgonna-potate
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The Other Rogers
"Mr. Rogers and Betty White... oh sh*t."
"Guys I just realized Loki is killing off the worthy."
- Magnus_40
"Funnily enough, Mr. Rogers lifted mjolnir in a comic once. I choose to believe it's canon."
- kotran1989
"Well, that’s wholesome."
- Roguewind
"I was sifting through the thread looking for this comic."
- rusnug
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The Villain Variant
"At least in the comics, Mjolnir’s definition of 'worthy' varies a good bit."
"As long as you’ve got decently good intentions and a fighting spirit, you are worthy for the most part. So there’s the obvious ones like Cap and Thor, but also some villains."
"One of the more well known examples is Dr. Doom, whose entire personality hinges on him wanting the best for the world and thinking the only way is through a maniacal dictatorship."
- lunaticboot
"Spider-Man can't wield it, and we see Spider-Man repeatedly seen as Marvels' most moral compass. Supposedly the reason is because Spidey won't kill."
"Cap and Thor have fought through wars, willing to kill to defend their ideals. Dr.Doom as well."
- tigerslices
"' 'The heart unwilling to swing the sword when needed will never have the strength to raise it in the first place' -Mjolnir"
- blexmer1
"That’s why they were surprised that Thanos could wield it, too."
"He believes he’s doing it for the survival of all species in the universe, i.e. a just cause."
- TheUncleverestDev
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A Unifying Force
"Dolly Parton"
"She fought and continues to fight for equality in country music for women. She uses her money to support good causes."
"For example, when the Gaitlinburg fires displaced a bunch of families about 5 years ago, she immediately pledged an extra $1000/month to each family for as long as they were out of their homes and delivered. And when people donated to her charity, she upped the donation."
"Elvis Presley wanted to record a version of “I Will Always Love You” back in the 70s (in fact, according to Priscilla, he sang it to her as he walked her to her car after signing the divorce papers), but Dolly said no because that would have require her to give up her songwriting rights."
"Because she retained those rights, she was the one who got an insane influx of cash after Whitney Houston’s version blew up in the 90s. What did she do? Invested in the real-estate development of an historically Black neighborhood in Nashville."
"She donates books to kids through her Imagination Library. Hell when Gal Gadot, was 'helping' by organizing a singalong of “Imagine,” Dolly was writing a check to Vanderbilt University Medical School to fund the research that eventually lead to the Moderna vaccine."
"Dolly is a fighter."
- mdsnbelle
"They need to work this cameo into next season’s Loki."
" *Hands Mjolnir to Thor (in front of the Hulk?) and asks 'Is this yours honey?' then casually walks off stage left.* "
- analyticalchem
"Dolly has been a shockingly common answer to this! But then again Dolly's an all around wonderful person and the last person to criticize her got cancelled by the right and left together so... a unifying force to be sure."
- GluttonAsteroth
"She carries a hand gun, and she knows how to use it. She's got a permit for conceal carry."
"She's one person who I'd trust would fight and kill for the right reasons."
- kjbrasda·
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"A Happy Little Dent"
"Bob Ross."
" 'We’re going to put a happy little dent right here.' ”
- Eledridan
" 'And here’s our enemy now. Standing beside a happy little tree. Let’s take mjolnir and just beat the devil out of him!' "
- dreagan021
"Is Bob Ross really willing to kill? Because that is one of the requirements, also please don't call me a nerd."
- ThatOnePieceOfPizza
"Bob Ross had a 20 year career in the US Air Force and was a drill sergeant. He wasn’t all quiet voices and gentle smiles his entire life."
- Ryukotaicho
"Nope."
"Dude cheated on his wife and stole the idea of the show. Wasn't all rainbows and happy trees behind the scenes on the Ross show."
"He's not worthy to wield."
- zamfire
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Absolute Unit
"When I was a kid, I had a buddy who's aunt was 6'5 and probably 250lb. Absolute unit of a woman."
"I watched her carry an old school refrigerator up the basement stairs without it touching a single step. Only person I can think of."
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Silly
"Mjolnir wasn't supposed to be about worth, it was about strength. The only other person I can think of that would have the strength to lift Mjolnir would be someone with the physical prowess of say Superman or The Incredible Hulk— but they’re not real people, so this question is just silly."
- [Reddit]
compete david oliver GIF by AsmodeeGames
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Keanu
"I say Keanu Reeves"
- thesynthwar
"Keanu Reeves."
"I will not elaborate."
- TheShadomasta
"I'm going to say Keanu Reeves."
"I don't think he's a very good actor (sorry, but I don't), but he's hella rich and famous, and somehow I've never heard a single negative thing about him."
"He has every reason in the world to be a smug, entitled asshole - even angry with what life has dealt him - but instead seems to be a decent and kind person."
- McFeely_Smackup
Sorry Keanu Reeves GIF
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By Voice Alone
"Morgan Freeman. His voice alone can move that hammer!"
- RadiantAcadia
morgan freeman i'm god GIF
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Not Exactly Wielding
"Doesn't matter how heavy it is, my cat would still find some way to nudge it off the f*cking table."
- Cells_Interlinked_77
Bored Cat GIF
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Harriet
"Harriet Tubman. Straight up 100%."
"And yes I wish she'd had it."
- Terpsichorean_Wombat
harriet tubman drama GIF by Underground
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Chuck
"It’s not Chuck Norris that’s worthy enough to wield Mjolnir, it’s Mjolnir that’s worthy enough to be wielded by Chuck Norris."
- Knewwhatthiswas
"Ah Chuck Norris jokes, how I’ve missed them!"
- GeneralDouglas1998
"I’m not sure he’s actually worthy, but not even Mjolnir wants to piss off Chuck Norris so it would just let him pick it up."
- TheDangerHeisenberg
Chuck Norris Karate Kick GIF
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Stan
"Stan Lee"
- 0DeadlyApple0
"Old man Stan Lee, yes."
"Had to have his character development through his younger years to establish his worthiness."
- iPeterParker
Super Hero Marvel GIF by Box Office
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Originally...
"Originally, Mjolnir was so heavy that only one person could life if unassisted: Thor's son Magni."
"Even Thor needed gloves and a belt to wield it."
"So no one. Not even Thor, really."
- Captain_Bunny-Rabbit
thor im hilarious GIF
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Worthy Warrior
"Lots of 'people I like and haven't done anything wrong in their life' answers."
"Worthy doesn't necessarily mean pure of heart, there is a warrior aspect to it too. I don't know how y'all are forgetting that the person who wields it must be a warrior."
"Odin wouldn't bless an actor with Mjolnir."
"Anyway, the real answer is Léo Major."
- SmokinDynamite
Bow Down Season 5 GIF by FOX TV
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Moment of honesty, I had forgotten about the whole "willingness to kill" thing when I initially suggested Betty ... but you know what, I'm just going to let it stand.
I can see Betty as a killer for the right reasons... which is pretty much the whole point.
So who do you think could lift it? Sound off in the comments.
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When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
Money Burn GIF by nog
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Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
south park wedding GIF
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See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
homer simpson episode 23 GIF
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
Disney World GIF
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.