Clueless in love?
Grab a pen and get ready to get a clue because we're breaking it down today.
Firstly, don't feel bad.
Lots of us are completely and totally oblivious. You're among friends here.
Reddit user IsellKidneys2356 asked:
"What screams 'I'm attracted to you?' "
If you're reading this article with a particular someone in mind, hoping this article will help you figure out if they're into you or not, keep reading til the end and we'll give you a sure-fire way to know.
You're Not That Funny
"Laughing at your worst jokes."
- scrimmybingus3
"I told my friend when he was nervous on his first date 'if she laughs, you got a shot' to which he replied 'why?' ”
"I said 'cause you ain’t f*cking funny and she’s catering to your frail ego just like all girls do when they like a guy' he said it was great advice lol 😂"
- thelastride23
"My girlfriend was so giggly when we first met and it was so precious."
"I have a good sense of humor but I know I’m not THAT funny. It gave me peace of mind early on knowing she probably had the same butterfly feeling in her stomach as me."
- lanman33
Marvel Studios Reaction GIF by Disney+GiphyTerrified Silence
"I worked alongside this guy for several months, and he never said a word to me."
"For the longest time, I thought he hated me, as he would actively go out of his way to avoid speaking to me at all, or even make any kind of eye contact."
"I thought he was super cute, but I'm also pretty shy and introverted, which is why I just let it go for several months."
"It eventually got to the point where it was just uncomfortable, and I asked him what the deal was, and what I could have possibly done to make him dislike me so much."
"It took him a minute or so to respond, and then he said 'I'm really sorry. I'm incredibly shy, and have been since I was a kid. But I think you are the most flawlessly beautiful woman I've ever seen, and I am terrified to talk to you.' "
"We've been together for over three years, and married for four months."
- littletinylotus
Big Hints
"Apparently my fiancee dropped a whole lot of hints before we got together."
"A big standout was complaining that she didn't have any plans for our Junior prom, and then asking me what my plans for that night were."
"My dumb@ss responded with something to the effect of 'F*ck prom, I'll be home playing Mario.' "
- uwu-lmao-xD
"My girlfriend did the same thing, to the point she kissed me and I managed to convince myself that she wasn't interested."
"I ignored it for another month before I got told by multiple people that she was into me and I asked her out. In conclusion, I am a f*cking idiot."
- original__pickles
"When my son was about 16 he went off on a camping weekend with a heap of friends. There was one girl who’d he’d been getting kind of close with for ages, and I had a fair idea that something would happen while they were away."
"So when I picked him up, I asked him how it had gone."
"He said it was so weird, they’d had a great night, it was almost bedtime and she hasn’t set up her tent yet. He asked her about it and she said she didn’t know how to put it up so she was just going to have to sleep on the ground by the fire."
"Ever the gentleman, he sprung to his feet and recruited a friend to help set it up for her in the dark and the cold. Damsel saved."
"Fast forward an hour or so and everyone’s asleep. He hears a rustle at his tent door and there she is, complaining that she’s so cold all on her own in her big scary tent."
"Bless that sweet ignorant boy, he said 'oh. Well here you go, take my sleeping bag' and held it out to her. He remembers she looked sad and confused and he didn’t understand; he’d done a nice thing and now she wouldn’t be cold. Damsel saved."
"He shivered and froze all night and ended up climbing into another tent and going top to toe with his buddy."
"I said to him 'Mate, do you reckon maybe she wanted to sleep in your tent with you?' and the look on that poor kid’s face when the penny dropped…"
- Kristyyyyyyy
The Looks
"When you're in a group and the person consistently looks at you whenever something funny or interesting happens."
- take-a-ride
"I had a meeting yesterday afternoon. It was the first time for most of us meeting in person."
"The last person to arrive was this stunning girl and when we looked at each other I swear to God there might as well have been lightning shooting out both our eyes."
"At first I thought 'nah I imagined that.' As she sat down close to me we looked at each other for a solid second and smiled at the same time for no particular reason other than it just feeling right."
"She started making conversation with me specifically. We had to split up into groups to interview people, and she and I were paired by the supervisor (best supervisor ever)."
"For the next two hours, we just joked and talked with each other and every time something funny happened we just looked at each other automatically."
"I've been with a lot of people but never had this sort of easy chemistry happen before, certainly not so quickly. I'm excited to talk to her some more, regardless of where it leads. I asked her out to lunch sometime and she said yes!"
"It might be a bit because we're noth busy but it's a good development :)"
- RomanRodriBR
Full Of Excuses
"Excuses to be near them. 'Lets study together - we'll get more work done ; 'Oh, you're going that way? me too, lets walk together.' "
- pronouns-r-they-them
"My sophomore year of college a friend of mine said we should skip a formal to get more studying done."
"These formals were a big deal campus-wide and everyone went. Also, we didn’t take a single class together."
"She showed up at my dorm wearing knee-high stockings and a men’s dress shirt that was unbuttoned to her cleavage. She was not wearing a bra."
"I…studied. Hurts to think about to this day."
- m4gnum_89
"I’m guilty of that second one lol."
"There was a girl in one of my college classes that I got to know really well that I started to get a huge crush on her. We would always walk out of class together and I had always said that her spot was on the way to my spot when in reality it was way off."
"But I just enjoyed those walks every day. I looked forward to that."
- yeezyfan23
Distraction
"Losing their train of thought when you walk by, while they are talking to someone else."
- buck-status-BROKEN
"Yup."
"I work with my spouse. We've been married 14 years. I still lose my train of thought when he walks by."
- take-a-ride
"This happened to me once."
"It was absurd how I trailed off when she went by in a summer dress. Good lord, 100% embarrassing."
- mynameisbp
"Omg this is true."
"I was giving a mock presentation to my group mate and that guy suddenly joined and spectated. I tripped up so many time in that presentation."
- andrew_hihi
Surprised Pixar GIF by DisneyGiphyThis Classic Move
"Finding any reason to touch each other."
"Whether is play fighting, feeling up muscles, poking someone's bruise, comparing hand sizes of they actively try to find a reason to touch you, they probably like you."
- biggaylikewoman
"Comparing hand sizes is a CLASSIC move."
- WinterBird01
"Comparing hand sizes is like my go to :/ I’m ashamed."
- Aldroe
Food = Love
"If they know you like a certain food and buy it for you."
"The guy I liked loved this one dumpling place near uni. He’d constantly stop and get some on the way home."
"One day when we where walking together, beforehand he said he felt like some but didn’t have his card so no money. So even though I knew he wanted some, when I asked if he wanted me to buy it for him he politely declined."
"So I pretended to buy some for myself (since I sometimes would). Then I ate like 3 to make it believable and said I was suddenly full and he could have the rest."
"I just wanted him to be happy with his dumplings."
- JackSparrowscompass
Absentmindedly
"When you catch them absentmindedly looking at you."
"Even if they’re doing something/talking to someone else but they’re still in tune with you and mindful of where you are in the room. Because, even subconsciously, they’re thinking about you."
"Also, going out of their way to make you smile/laugh is a good one. Same with keeping notes on your interests."
- NinjaCakies
"Most of the girls that I knew were interested in me were girls who I kept catching staring at me."
"Initially I never made any effort go further, but then I did and found out they were actually interested in me. I have figured out the 'I like you' gaze now and it's easy to know who likes me."
- garlic_bread_thief
"Finding reasons to touch you, wanting to see you, hear your voice and most important - their gaze."
"You can just tell by the way someone looks at you. When you’re in a group or a party, you look at them and find them already looking at you from across the room."
- Skinnylicious3
"Its in the way they watch you from across the room when they think you are not noticing."
"The easy smile when you are talking to them. They really listen to what you have to say without talking too. much because they are cataloging and filing it into their brain for future reference."
"But it starts with the look..."
- Melesa-rdwudforst
Third Person
"A tendency to end sentences by looking at each other even if there's other people around."
"Also, making frequent side comments to each other in group settings. They just want to talk to each other more."
"It can be hard to notice if it's happening to you, but is super obvious from a third person view when people are into each other."
- Nightthunder
make up lol GIF by LifetimeGiphyTalk Talk Talk
"Always trying to find ways to talk to you."
- rottingrodents
"Walking up to you and finding an excuse to start a conversation with you is usually a good sign, in my experience."
- in_the_comatorium
The Reflex
"This might come off as egotistical, but it's something I noticed and haven't been able to tell anyone ..."
"At the gym I have a 'friendly acquaintance' who I see all the time. We generally just exchange pleasantries, but in December I ruptured the triceps tendon in my right arm."
"She happens to be a physical therapist, so there has been a lot more chit-chat since then."
"A few days ago I entered the gym, and went to stow my jacket in a cubby. She was nearby, so I said 'Good morning' and when she turned I saw her pupils dilate to like 11."
"Since then I've seen the same thing twice."
"Ocular reflexes don't lie."
- SurlyJason
This List
"Men to women:"
"Driving. He takes you home or picks you up without being asked."
"Killing things. He drops whatever he is doing when you need him to help you smash a bug or trap a mouse."
"Paying attention. He notices changes in your grooming and dress and remembers things you say."
"Ponying up. He pays for meals, coffee, movie tickets, etc. even if you aren't dating."
"Showing off. He subtly or not so subtly mentions how much he can bench press or how much his last client paid him."
"Spending time. He seems not to mind hanging around you for no apparent reason."
"Telling you in so many words. He voluntarily admits that he did all these things because he was attracted to you."
- Loud_Ad_5518
Some people aren't just oblivious - they're almost impossible to convince.
Even if you tell them flat-out that you're attracted to them.
Even if you have sex with them.
Even if you marry them!
Yeah ... there may be no hope for these folks.
I Do. For Real.
"It took a while of being literally married for me to be convinced my husband was into me."
"I’m not always the smartest lol, no matter how much he told me or kissed me or did sweet, thoughtful gestures, my own insecurity fought me every step of the way."
"I do understand now that I’m truly loved just as much as I love him."
- carsandtelephones37
"For me it’s the intrusive thought that my wife believes she loves me but doesn’t realize she’s actually just tolerating me and when someone better comes around she’ll be like 'oh damn I was wrong.' ”
- A_Doormat
"Married 5 years, that's how it feels to me."
"I'm slowly realizing that she didn't just marry me because I was the best option at the time."
"She has a hard time expressing love because she grew up in a very suppressed household. Her parents never kissed, showed much affection in front of the kids beyond saying I love you."
"Most of the extent of her showing love is just flat out telling me."
"She's brutally honest with her words and words mean a lot to her so, that's good, but I'm just not a words guy, I need physical touch, quality time, etc."
"But over the past 5 years, I've slowly been noticing the subconscious things she does that tell me she loves me. Some of the signs that people have posted here are actually what she does and it shows that even though she has a hard time expressing it, that adorable heart of hers yearns after me."
"A year ago, we were in a really rough spot, mostly fueled by me not feeling loved by her, so the fact that I can acknowledge this is huge for us."
- [Reddit]
Living Single Kiss GIFGiphySis Dropped The Ball
"A girl that had a locker beside mine in high school asked if I was going to prom and who I was going with."
"I replied, 'Nah, I’m not going I don’t want to pay for that sh*t.' Even more, one of her friends also pushed even further by asserting that we should go to prom together and I held my ground by, once again, stating that I wouldn’t even be going."
"I later found out that this girl had asked my sister if I had someone to go to prom with and made it clear that she wanted to go with me."
"Why my sister didn’t let me know of this information I will never know."
"I was definitely very attracted to this girl but my dumbass couldn’t comprehend that she would actually want to go with me."
"Oops."
- Mironium
I Cringe
"Close contact, especially the unconventional ones."
"Went out with workmates and a colleague (slightly tipsy) started rubbing my leg with her foot while at table."
"Never been flirted with like that and didn't know how to respond appropriately, so I panicked and just gently pushed her away. I cringe at how I handled the situation to this day."
- someguywithdiabetes
Cherry Stem Saga
"What screams 'I'm attacted to you?' I wouldn't know because I'm an idiot."
"My wife tied a cherry stem in her mouth for me the night we started dating. Tied a cherry stem - it's such a cliche but I still missed it."
"She had to 'scream louder' and hold my hand and press into me hard later on because I was f*cking hopeless taking the hint."
- Threndsa
Don't worry, we didn't forget out promise - you're here for that sure-fire way to find out if someone is attracted to you.
You ready?
ASK THEM.
Yes, it's awkward - but it really is the only way to know for sure. Sorry. Thems the breaks, fam.
You're gonna have to just ask.
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Blatant Lies Patients Have Told Medical Professionals
Reddit user DrPloyt asked: 'Doctors and nurses of Reddit, what’s the most blatant lie a patient has told you about why they’re in the hospital?'
In order for medical professionals to properly assess and diagnose a patient, the patient has to describe their symptoms as best they can.
But not every patient gives all the accurate information, possibly because they may be embarrassed about how they got into their predicament in the first place.
Regardless, doctors and nurses have seen it all and can tell if a patient is not being forthright.
Curious to hear from medical experts online, Redditor DrPloyt asked:
"Doctors and nurses of Reddit, what’s the most blatant lie a patient has told you about why they’re in the hospital?"
Those who felt ashamed thought they could get away with lying.
The STD Source
"Had a patient convince his wife he got an STD from a dirty toilet seat in the ER when he arrived to the hospital. He was in house for about a week or two after, his wife dutifully staying with him each day until about 6. She home cooked meals for him every night and would bring them to the hospital each day while trying to file complaints to us for his STD he got from us."
"A doctor had to kindly explain to her the impossibility of him getting that particular STD from a toilet seat and it also become active / symptomatic in that time frame. She never believed us."
"After she went home each evening at 6 to cook for him for the following day, his affair partner would show up from 7-10 each evening."
– Duffarum
Running From The Law
"I’m a paramedic. I had that. They called 911 to get away from the police and a fight that had been happening.Jumped in the ambulance and started screaming at us to just drive away. We locked ourselves up front and said that’s not how this works and he ran away."
– Fianna9
Substance Abusers
"I’m a paramedic, and it’s the ones who deny doing drugs and insist we don’t know our job. I had one patient swearing up and down he doesn’t do any drugs, he was just sleeping. On the kitchen floor. While cooking."
“Do you know why your mom is crying? She just did cpr on you because you stopped breathing”
"Then admitted to doing some weed. And crack. And heroin. And meth."
"ETA- this was after he woke up to naloxone. I always ask twice if drugs are suspected before moving on to other medical issues."
– Fianna9
Attention Seeker
"I've told this story many times before, but when I worked in the emergency department there was a frequent flier who would come in complaining of migraines, seizures and stroke symptoms. She was completely full of sh*t, just wanted drugs and attention. One time the symptom she presented with was that she could only speak Spanish, but the thing was that in reality she couldn't speak Spanish*,* so you had to ask her yes or no questions or she just wouldn't respond. If the answer was yes she would say 'si' and if the answer was no she would shake her head, because she didn't know the Spanish word for 'no' is no.'"
– PigWithAWoodenLeg
The Axe Thrower
"Psych patient told me she didn’t know why they were keeping her in the facility. She claimed nothing was wrong with her, wasn’t on drugs, and didn’t do anything to be admitted… after 30 minutes of talking she admitted to throwing an axe at her neighbor, unprovoked after use of meth."
– lanakame
Quick observations revealed these patients were untruthful.
The Ex
"I lied to hospital staff once before, my ex gf stabbed me in the hand and it cut me wide open. So I get to triage and I tell them I fell and accidentally cut myself, because I didn't want to get my ex in trouble (yes I know I'm an idiot blah blah blah I've heard it a million times) when I get into a room I look around and notice an unusually high amount of domestic violence posters on the wall, I thought 'huh that's weird' the first thing the nurse says is 'we know it can be hard to talk about being abused' like damn they were on to me from the start, I still don't know how they knew, but I ended up spilling the beans, they said they wouldn't tell the police if I didn't want them to."
– dayzers
Does Not Compute
"I was in the ER for a suspected testicular torsion, and we saw a guy with a pretty clear bullet wound on his arm. The lady handling intake asked him what happened, and he said he fell off his skateboard."
– doctordoctorpuss
What's Up, Doc?
"I had a frustrating itch inside my rectum and the carrot was the only object that I could fit in there"
– LithuanianLion
What The Ex-Con Did
"Easy. A guy came in complaining of being constipated and couldn't poop for 5 days. He reported rectal blood and difficulty passing gas. A CT was done and showed a 9 inch linear object bordering or slightly puncturing through his bowel with questionable free air. With the CT results in hand we confronted the guy. 9 MONTHS AGO, yep, 9 months ago this guy got out of prison where he stuck a prison shank in his butt to hide it during a cell search. It was already in there about a year before he got out. He didn't tell anyone for fear of adding on his prison sentence. He was never able to retrieve it and thought it would just pass naturally. He was just hoping we'd give him some prescription strength laxatives and he'd have better luck. He needed surgery."
– alwaysforgettingmypw
Things got out of hand for these patients with erectile dysfunction.
Hard Situation
"Back when Viagra first dropped, every grandpa in Miami with chest pain would lie about why they had a raging erection. Or the boner would be gone, and they'd be so much more confident in their answer. No matter how much we stressed how unsafe lying would be, no matter whether we ferried the ladies out of the room."
"It was quite a way for little baby nurse me to learn how low blood pressure could get. Being in Miami at the time was like being on the front of a boomer battlefield for erectile rights."
– MissAnthropicRN
Forever Stiffie
"Oh boy."
"I'm an admin in a hospital and just the other week we had a younger guy (30s) come in because he had injected viagra into his unit...his erection had lasted for a worrying amount of hours so he came to ED."
"After having 220mls drained from his member, he regained full function."
"My colleagues and I joked that he wouldn't be touching it for at least a day or two."
– HailCrystals
The moral of the story is, it's pointless to lie to your doctor.
The truth will eventually come out, and it should, because your life could depend on it.
And the truth of the matter is, doctors and nurses don't care about your situation, no matter how embarrassed you are. They just want to make sure you are properly tended to.
Any judgement from them will most likely be because you're a bad liar, not because you shoved a foreign object up your bum.
Every moment we breathe is a moment to learn something new.
What's funny is the more we learn, the more we're shocked.
Some knowledge is so obvious it's stunning how oblivious we are.
Like, "How did I not know this sooner?'
And no matter what I can still be shocked.
Redditor r3tr0gam3r83 wanted to hear about which realizations in life have left people SHOOK, so they asked:
"What is something that blew your mind once you realized it?"
Avocados are not vegetables.
They're fruits, berries to be exact.
Like what?!?!
Colleagues
GIF by Bud LightGiphy"Sometimes it is more important to like your colleagues than the actual job."
"I had shi**y jobs with the most amazing colleagues and had shi**y colleagues and the most amazing job. I'd pick the first every time."
chr989
Star Trekking
"That you could legitimately travel at warp speed through the center of galaxies and never run any real risk of hitting a star. That’s how spread out space really is."
justanotherguyhere16
"Also, galaxies, stars, and even the Universe is constantly moving. I think time travel has been invented, but they can’t figure out the 'space' part of it.
"Yes, they can travel back in time, but relatively speaking, they can’t figure out how to navigate to the part of the planet they want to reach. So when they travel back in time, it’s relative to where they currently are, and end up not moving through space, thus ending up in the middle of an empty vacuum."
theknights-whosay-Ni
Jaws is Old
"That sharks predated the rings of Saturn."
BeardedDominant
"Sharks also developed the immune system that ended up in both dinosaurs/birds and mammals."
csiz
"We don’t know that. We can’t say for certain that the rings are only 100 million years old. It’s still debated."
The_Kek_5000
"I'm pretty sure that sharks are older than trees."
Cayderent
From the Trees
"One day I sat on a tram, passing a river. There was a duck in a tree. I realized I'd never seen ducks in trees. No one else seemed to notice, but I was puzzled. Now whenever I come across something that seems intuitive but I have never considered I call it a duck in a tree."
Ol_Pasta
"This realization happened to me this past year. We apparently have a family of wood ducks in one of the big trees in our yard. Our neighbor said she has seen a duck walking around on a branch. I made it 37 years without knowing some ducks can roost in trees. My wife caught a video of the mama leading like eight ducks into the field next to our house. We aren't even near water."
jwbourne
Artistic Timeline
Confused Eminem GIFGiphy"Pablo Picasso and Eminem were both alive at the same time."
leebon427
"I’d bet a lot of people think Picasso is a Renaissance artist."
editormatt
I admit it. I'm one of those people. Pablo and Marshall, in one lifetime.
New facts are fun.
The New World
Design Loop GIF by xponentialdesignGiphy"They were colonizing the Wild West at the same time as they were building skyscrapers in Manhattan. I always think of them taking place eighty to a hundred years apart. It's wild."
Emilayday
Oh the Power
"Nuclear power plants are just steam power plants that use nuclear reactions to heat the water. There's no fancy magic extracting energy directly from nuclear material. They just boil water and spin a turbine."
RenaKunisaki
"Most electrical generation is spinning a turbine. Photovoltaic solar power is pretty much the only exception, and it's not the only form of solar power. There's solar thermal power, which uses mirrors or lenses to concentrate the heat of the sun to make steam and turn a turbine."
Brawndo91
The Empire
"The Roman Empire fully fell less than 50 years before the discovery of the new world."
South-by-north
"The Romans also had copper wire, magnets, and battery acid. They could have invented electricity hundreds of years before it was actually discovered. But they didn't. The wire was used for jewelry, the magnets as lodestones, and the battery acid was used to clean the rust off of swords."
Kahzgul
"RIP Byzantine Empire. 1453 never forget."
crossbowman44
The Witness
"Owl‘s silent flight. I mean I always knew that but a while ago was the first time I actually witnessed it. Owl came flying towards me and landed only a few feet away and you couldn‘t hear anything. Crazy."
Zealousideal-You-324
"I saw a barn owl swoop down and catch a mouse while hiking at night, and the whole thing happened in complete silence. It gave me a deep sense of unease because it was literally like someone hit the mute button on life."
VulcanVisions
Bad Kermit
Kermit The Frog Meme GIF by IdentityGiphy"Poison dart frogs aren't poisonous in captivity."
"I own 5 of them and anytime I tell someone I own some I always get 'Do you ever lick them' or 'Can you go kill someone with them.' But yeah they get their poison from what they eat, and all I give them is fruit flies."
JMfury
Poison frogs?
That sounds like something Rose would have a story about on 'The Golden Girls.'
Romantic relationships are great. They are full of excitement, fun, and even some stress, though it's mostly good stress (yes, that exists).
However, not all romances are meant to last. Whether it's because you grew apart or you realized the person you were with wasn't who you thought they were, a relationship can end.
Sometimes, those relationships are something you can look back on fondly as you move forward. Other times, they are relationships you regret.
Redditors know a lot about the second type, and are ready to share their stories.
It all started when Redditor Ingenuiie asked:
"What are your dating regrets?"
You Must Matter
"Dont get hung up on someone who doesnt give a f*ck"
– Speedy-Thunder
"Never make someone a priority who only makes you an option."
"Someone said it first. Probably Abe Lincoln"
– snarfdarb
"Don’t set yourself on fire to keep them warm"
– Stalkz_YT
Just Chill
"Getting so caught up in the fun early stages of the relationship and planning activities for dates that I forgot to just relax and be myself, take it a week at a time and see how things went. Pretty sure it made me seem too pushy, so things didn’t end very well for me. Lesson learned: chill tf out lmao"
– Spectronautic1
"That's me. I still struggle with it now tbh. Although I'm trying to keep a lid on it and just be chill."
– layinwitme-
End It
"I regret not ending relationships I was unhappy in sooner (like years sooner)"
– Zestyclose-Chef5215
"I'm in the middle of this right now. I knew 3 years ago but I convinced myself that maybe I was wrong and that things would change. We're still together, and I'll always love her, but I'm not happy, and I don't think I will be until the relationship ends. I can't let this go on much longer. Cheers."
– moniqer
This Is Me
"That I hid some of my hobbies and interests because I was scared they looked dorky."
"As soon as I stopped hiding it I met my partner."
"(Model railways ftw)."
– Singingmute
"Never be ashamed of your hobbies. It may make you look like a nerd or a dork but you don't need the kind of people who would make fun of them."
– aris_ada
"My SO loves the fact that I'm into model trains (her words, not mine.)"
"She laid it out for me when we first started dating: I'm handy around the house - I can tackle carpentry, electrical work, and have general knowledge about how to troubleshoot/fix things."
"It's a combo of artistry, technology, and history/research so there are always things to learn. It's a generally wholesome hobby that also promotes patience and working towards something over a long period of time instead of rewarding instant gratification."
"It's a fun hobby that I balance with other interests that we do together (outdoorsy stuff, board games, being history nerds.) We love each other for all of who we are, not just parts of who we are, and we wouldn't want the other person to change."
– dualsusser
Sometimes, Alone Is Better
"I should not have settled for someone I wasn't super compatible with just because I was lonely"
– Feline_is_kat
"This happened to me when I moved to a new city."
"It was great at first because I instantly had fairly large friend group and such but I realized years later just how much I had actually passed up on and compromised on."
"Still not sure I recognize myself anymore."
– nelsonalgrencametome
Love That Lets Go
"Always being the last to let go, and never letting go easy."
"Edit- the never letting go easy is the part I wish I could change."
– forex_1911
"Sometimes it’s just who you are as a person. There’s nothing wrong with that. We all have our personality traits that make life easier/harder for certain scenarios."
– ChlamydiaDonations4U
"That’s the best explanation for me because I certainly can’t seem to learn from previous mistakes no matter how many times I make them."
"To learn from them would mean to stop trying to date entirely"
– TuesdayNightMassacre
Take A Chance
"Not taking chances with various girls/ women throughout my life when I had the opportunities to."
– apG_13
"Honestly, this is why I (female) started asking men out. I was doing inventory in the supply closet when I heard my crush and several of his friends talking about me and wondering who I was dating. Because apparently I had to already be dating someone. One of the guys asked my crush if he'd ask me out, the guy laughed and said he didn't have a snowball's chance in hell, so he'd skip the humiliation. The other dudes agreed with him."
"And... I was just sitting there on the other side of the wall with my clipboard and a box of junk going... WTF?!? I started paying a little more attention and realized I got talked about a lot. It was infuriating. How could my dating life be utterly non-existent while guys were having those sorts of conversation about me?"
"So... A couple months later, I walked up to my crush on new year's eve at midnight, kissed him, and told him we should go out. I know I went a bit too far in the other direction from passive behavior, but it worked. He wasn't really coherent for the next half hour, just smiling and staring at me, but we were officially dating the next week."
"Being proactive was generally a very positive thing for me. Men were almost always absolutely thrilled to be asked out, picked up, and taken on a date..."
– LostDogBoulderUtah
"YES. This is exactly it. I wish all women knew this. I do the exact same thing and it works like a charm, men love being hit on and asked out! Women, they LOVE it do not be afraid. My boyfriend raves about how I flirted with him so obviously and kind of teased him and then asked him out lol. And I have done exactly that in probably 75% of the relationship I have had. Men like when you pick them and have a lot of confidence and just make it really fun for them to be hit on, and you don't have to be self-conscious about it bc believe me they love it. They hardly ever have this happen to them, usually they have to do the work. And it also just sets a really good tone for the relationship because you're going to ask for the things you want, overall."
– Subject-Hedgehog6278
Romantic Intelligence
"That I didn’t try to date more in my early 20s. Now I’m in my mid 30s with a combined relationship experience of a little over a year."
"I basically have the romantic intelligence of a 16-year-old."
– ThrowawayOfALoserr
"Looking at this thread, I'm seeing the regrets swing from "I dated even though I didn't like the person/people and they messed me up for future dates." to "I didn't date enough and now I'm not experienced enough for future dates.""
"I'm starting to think this "romantic intelligence" thing isn't about experience so much as self-love and self-confidence which can be found with or without romantic relationships. Plus a little bit of finding the right person."
– 11Buckwheat11
Rip Off The Band-Aid
"Oh damn my first relationship was this gradual shift from we're in a relationship to we're kinda in a relationship but figuring things out but she still wanted all the things I was doing for her, to we're definitely not in a relationship but still talking regularly, it was months."
"Had I just stepped up and said "okay, this is either a yes or a no, there's no middle ground here, if we're a couple we're a couple but if we aren't, I can't have you in my life right now", it would have spared me QUITE a bit of pain."
– 1CEninja
Location, Location, Location
"So far my biggest regret was moving half way across the country with someone and when I was struggling to adjust to that location they refused to move a few hours for me to a different location. That really hurt. Felt like I gave up so much for them and it turns out they wouldn't do the same for me. I'll never move for love again."
– Barkingcat29
Keep Some Eggs
"Despite many warnings from people trying to help me, I put all my eggs in the same basket. Married young and devoted myself to someone thinking that devotion would always be reciprocated, but apparently people change even if you don't. Always be prepared for the other shoe to drop, I guess is my advice. Kinda cynical, I know, but recent experiences taught me a lesson I never wanted to learn."
– Silk_Song_
Ouch! That's a lot of regret. But I hold out hope.
Just remember, you have to kiss a lot of frogs to find your prince (or princess)!
People Explain Which Things They Thought Everyone Was Exaggerating About Until They Experienced Them
Life lessons are forged in experience.
So many of us love to think we know what another person is feeling, and their reactions are just emotional.
Or what they're saying about what they're going through feels a bit over the top.
So many people are just dramatic, right?
Wrong.
Until we walk in those shoes, we'll never know.
Redditor rentinghappiness wanted to hear about the things everyone really didn't know anything about until it happened to them, so they asked:
"What is something you used to think people were over-exaggerating about until you experienced it yourself?"
We never really know anything about anything until we try it for ourselves.
Mouth Issues
Dentist GIFGiphy"Dentist chiming in… tooth pain. I knew academically how painful they could be until it happened to me."
juneburger
"You know the pain is serious when you start looking forward to the inevitable root canal."
HailMari248
Wonders of Nature
"Giant sequoia trees. When I finally saw them in person, they looked fake. I could not comprehend a tree of that size."
schaefer001
"And we may have lost 15-20% of the remaining trees during some big fires in 2020 and 2021. A 2011 estimate puts it that there were only 80,000 remainings. They truly are wondrous organisms that I feel like everyone should have the chance to experience if they can."
"I'm a big believer in doing everything we can to protect and preserve these silent giants. It's really sad that so many were cut down by loggers when the wood is such poor quality for human purposes, to begin with. Such an utter and sad waste."
this_is_poorly_done
Just Me
"Loneliness."
Fried__SoapI
"I'm with you. Put all my cards into a girl who went suddenly cold and dark on me. Now I'm alone at rock bottom figuring out my next moves. You know, the smartest people in the world and also the happiest people in the world can be the loneliest?"
"I was only recently informed it's okay to talk to myself and hype myself. Enjoy my own company. I'm absolutely going to learn to do that. I'm thinking of painting, walking, and weekend trips out on a bus. Would be nice if you could have joined me even if we sat in silence."
Roofdragon
The Years Gone By...
"The physical pain of getting older. Damn."
marklikeadawg
"The emotional pain too. I get so nostalgic and teary over the past and how much has changed. It's a weird grieving process over losing your youth and the way things were."
heethersmeether
"On my 35th birthday, my wife woke me up with a cupcake and a candle, sang me 'Happy Birthday' and then congratulated me on being '15 from 50'... that really hit me hard. The other day I turned 45 and she said '5 from 50' and that hit me so hard, I just wanted to stay in bed all day. I still feel like an irresponsible teen but I'm pushing 50. Insane."
Opa_Kalaka
It's Hazy
Confused Always Sunny GIF by It's Always Sunny in PhiladelphiaGiphy"Brain fog. I had an alcohol withdrawal seizure in March. My short-term memory and sense of time are absolutely sh*t right now. On the plus side, I haven't had a drink in over 90 days and I don't want one."
Sideshow_Bob_Ross
Oh the wonders of the brain.
What a mess.
Scorched
Menopause Hot Flashes GIF by Kino LorberGiphy"Hot Flashes. I didn’t think they were this bad. I’m a 31-year-old man who took Wellbutrin for the past month and hot flashes are a side effect."
"I thought you just thought you were hot. No motherf**ker you are. You’re super hot legitimately, and you have to do something about it or you’ll go insane. It’s not in your head. It’s your brain raising your temps until you can’t focus on anything else."
_PswayZ_
Everlasting
"Chronic illness, there is absolutely no way you can truly understand the impact unless you experience it."
Disastrous-Phase-979
"Just that idea of always being sick and you will NEVER not be sick again."
"AND you're expected to participate in society just the same as everyone else. It's deeply f**ked up."
Farisr9k
"I like the part where I've been in pain for 25 years so I can kind of still function even when it's really bad."
"And then I try to get an ambulance guy or an admin assistant in a hospital to believe that I'm having an emergency and they're like 'You seem fine, take some Tylenol and go home' until I finally get a blood test, and then the doctor goes 'Holy crap, you're about to die, why didn't you come to the ER sooner.'"
"Like, listen up MF, I had to take a go**amn Uber to get here and then argue with reception for an hour."
BlahBlahILoveToast
Stoned
"How much a kidney stone hurts."
SpiritusSanctu
"Most people expect it to hurt the most when passing a stone through the urethra. Nothing prepared me for the pain as it passed through my kidney/ureter."
"One second I would be fine, carrying on conversations, prancing around nimbly-nimbly. The next second I would be keeled over, crying in agony, losing my lunch due to the sudden onset of crippling pain. 0/10 ... Would not recommend it."
King_of_Lunch223
Close Your Eyes
"Insomnia."
Successful_Fall7801
"Oh, what I would give to not have insomnia! I go through periods of sleeping more or less normal, and then for seemingly no reason, I’ll have weeks on end where a good night of sleep is IMPOSSIBLE. I’ll get 2-4 hours of sleep despite pills, tea, baths, white noise, meditation - everything."
"I’ll spend my days so deeply, utterly exhausted that I can barely think, and my whole body feels heavy, lifeless. It’s hard to feel any kind of emotion, let alone happiness or contentedness. Just existing as a human-shaped puddle until the time when I can go to bed and hope to god that tonight will be different for some unknown reason."
"Insomnia is a real bi*ch. It will tank your mental health and send you spiraling really fast."
thesmallshadows
Beep
Meme Reaction GIF by TravisGiphy"Tinnitus. It’s torture."
DissidentBliss
"I don't mind it much 'cause I've had it since I was born. That means I don't know what proper silence is."
77x5ghost
"Me too, they thought I had hearing issues when I was young because I couldn’t really hear some of the beeps well because they matched the pitch of the ringing."
ehter13
Don't judge another until you lace up their shoes and walk a mile in them!
Do you have anything else to share? Let us know in the comments.