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"What's the phone number for Heaven?"

People on Reddit were asked: "What other surprisingly deep questions have you been asked by kids?" These are some of the best answers.




2/26 My daughter came to me and said, "Daddy, I have a problem and maybe you can help me out with it. How do I know that I'm real and not just a dream of someone else?"

The question caught me off guard, but I decided to introduce Descartes to her and said that there was no real way of knowing, but that there was a guy who used to think about these types of things and he said, "I think, therefore I am" and that means that if you are thinking and can create, then it is the best proof that you exist.

She countered with "How do I know that it's not just the dream making me think that I am thinking?"

At that point, I knew that I wasn't going to win and told her that thinking was still the closest to proof that we have. It contented her enough and she went back to watching iCarly.

thinwhiteduke99

3/26 My cousin was 7-8ish when she came up to me and asked "Since I know English and think in English that means that someone who knows French thinks in French too right?"

I said yes and then what she said made me rather sad. "Then even telepathy couldn't stop different people from fighting and hurting each other...."

Nezumify

4/26 When I was a teacher, one of my 1st graders asked "Do you have any kids?" After I said that I didn't and I didn't even have a wife or a girlfriend, he said "That's too bad. Do you know how I know you would be a good dad? You never hit me."

God, I spent so many lunch hours crying in the staff bathroom at that job.

elliotrosewater

5/26 My 6 year old son asked me why when he farts, spiders run away.

-Teekey-

6/26 My cousin asked me (he was in 1st or 2nd grade) when we were sitting in my grandma's garden (my guess was that he read/heard it somewhere but it was still amazing that a 7 year old was thinking about such things.)

'Mike? How would you know that you are happy if you were never sad before?'
'Well you wouldn't really'
'So it's a good thing people are also sad?'

I didn't really know what to say. It's just I did not really realize that everything is relative till I was much much older than him.

Joke_Choke

7/26 My four year old nephew looked out the window when we were driving cross country:

'That's my world out there, isn't it?'

iam4real

8/26 "What if when you die, part of you is still alive and you just have to sit there underground forever?" Asked by a little four year old at a summer camp I was working at. Scared my ultra religious friend.

applemint

9/26 My brother was always very interested in the consciousness of other children when he was a toddler. Whenever there was a baby around, he'd walk up to them and their mother, frown down at the kid when they were shown to him, look at the mother and ask "Do they know they're alive yet?"

He creeped a lot of my aunts and my mother's friends out. Never got a good answer, either.

[deleted]

10/26 At an Italian restaurant with my ten-year-old last week: I ask him if he likes his food. He nods, pauses, looks down and says "I wonder what my arm tastes like?" He then licks his arm, looks off in the distance, and says "Tastes...neutral."

agrammalech

11/26 Apparently when I was 4 years old, I had this conversation with my dad.

"Dad, are there infinite words?"
"No, son, but there are infinite numbers."
"Well if there is a word for every number, then there must be infinite words."

Then I walked away and left my dad mind-blown.

Waja_Wabit

12/26 My 5 yr old little girl once said "If plants need rain and sun to grow, and rainbows are made of light and water, are rainbows plant food?"

some_body_else

13/26 My four year old cousin asked is apparently very interested in infinity. As a mathematician, I tried to explain things as best I could for him. One day he sits down with me, draws a circle and says:

"Okay, so there are infinity lines from the middle of this circle to the sides right?"
"Yes"
"But what if we extend those lines out? is there more infinity?"

[Kid], Cantor went mad about this [stuff]. You're four. Go play with some Hot Wheels. I can't wait to see what he does when he grows up. Fingers crossed for mathematician!

mathjokes


14/26 As a teacher I get quite a few like that. My favorite was when a 5 yr old boy asked me "Why don't we just leave them alone, and then they can leave us alone?" when talking about wars. Or "Why do they hate us? If someone wants to hurt where I live then they must hate us."

[deleted]

15/26 "Why is the moon called the moon?" took me a while and a couple of science books to answer

"Why is the Sun called the Sun?" was similarly perplexing while "Why is a fence called a fence?" returned a surprisingly interesting answer.

Mr_A

16/26 My 5 year old daughter. Explained gravity in it's simplest form to her when she was 4. She asked about stones falling to the ground. So explained this to her a bit in a very simple way, thinking 'maybe a bit to much information for a 4 year old".

Fast forward when she was 5, almost exactly 1 year later (and we didn't discuss gravity in the meanwhile) and we were driving home. Suddenly she asks me "daddy, does light fall down as well?" After picking my jaw from the floor I checked and asked if she meant the same thing as we discussed a year before about stones falling to the ground. Yes, that's what she meant. She applied gravity to light, all by her self!

I was beaming with joy behind the wheel and was oh so proud :-) She later told me she wants to be an astronaut, discover the end of the universe and take me there to show it to me. Atta girl!

reddwarf666

17/26 My girlfriend was on a road trip and her (then) 5 year old nephew asks her "Are we here yet?"

A seemingly innocent mixup of words caused a deep philosophical awakening that was very hard to explain.

tarot15

18/26 After an overly enthusiastic salesperson greeted my 4 year old niece, took her hand, and started walking away with her my horrified brother had to talk to her about "stranger danger". This led to some inevitable questions like... "Daddy if I see a stranger can I kill them?"

atemporalsquid

19/26 "What if the light at the end of the tunnel when you die is just you popping out of a vagina in your next life?"

[deleted]


20/26 "How do I know we all see the same colors? What if my red isn't your red but actually your red is my orange?"

[deleted]

21/26 When I was 4, my dad picked me up from preschool, and took me to Big Boy's. As we're sitting at our table, I said "Why are we here, Daddy?"

"Well, we're here to have lunch!" he replied. "No, no. Why are we here ON THIS EARTH?"

Kateysomething

22/26 My 4 year old son had just lost a bunny, and was really freaked out about dying. One night we were laying in my bed hanging out and he is quiet for a while. After about 5 minutes of thinking he goes "Mama, will you hold my hand when I'm dying so I don't get scared?" I still tear up thinking about it.

Scrabbleurface

23/26 My younger brother once asked me (when he was four, mind you) "Why do we have two eyes if we only see one thing?" It amazes me what kids will think of.

ArcticZen

24/26 Coaching a u-10 soccer team: "Coach! What is the opposite of time?"

What in the world is the opposite of time!?

uclastarr

25/26 My son once asked me "What does purple do?" I have yet to come up with a reasonable answer.

downvotesyourmadness

26/26 My son, then just shy of four, asked me, "Why do trees exist in this world?"

I tried to explain to him in as basic terms as I could why plants grow, and that some plants grow tall so they can get more sunlight, and so on.

He cut me short, asking, "Is it because they like to grow?" I thought that was a very elegant answer.

because_its_there

Source

Image by Clker-Free-Vector-Images from Pixabay

Have you ever been reading a book, watching a movie, or even sitting down for a fantastical cartoon and began to salivate when the characters dig into some doozy of a made up food?

You're not alone.

Food is apparently fertile ground for creativity. Authors, movie directors, and animators all can't help but put a little extra time and effort into the process of making characters' tasty delights mouthwatering even for audiences on the other side of the screen.

Read on for a perfect mixture of nostalgia and hunger.

AllWhammyNoMorals asked, "What's a fictional food you've always wanted to try?"

Some people were all about the magical foods eaten in the magical places. They couldn't help but wish they could bite into something with fantastical properties and unearthly deliciousness.

Nutritious

"Enchanted golden apple" -- DabbingIsSo2015

"The Minecraft eating sounds make me hungry" -- FishingHobo

"Gotta love that health regeneration" -- r2celjazz

"Pretty sure those are based off the golden apples that grant immortality. Norse mythology I think?" -- Raven_of_Blades

Take Your Pick

"Nearly any food from Charlie and the Chocolate factory" -- CrimsonFox100

"Came here to say snozzberries!" -- Utah_Writer

"Everlasting Gobstoppers #1, but also when they're free to roam near the chocolate river and the entire environment is edible." -- devo9er

Peak Efficiency

"Lembas" -- Roxwords

"The one that fills you with just a bite? My fat a** would be making sandwiches with two lembas breads and putting bacon, avocado and cheese inside. Then probably go for some dessert afterwards. No wonder why those elves are all skinny, eating just one measly bite of this stuff." -- sushister

Some people got stuck on the foods they saw in the cartoons they watched growing up. The vibrant colors, the artistic sounds, and the exaggerated movements all come together to form some good-looking fake grub.

The One and Only

"Krabby patty 🍔" -- Cat_xox

"And a kelp shake" -- titsclitsntennerbits

"As a kid I always pretended burgers from McDonalds were Krabby Patties, heck from time to time I still do for the nostalgia of it all. Many of my friends did the same thing." -- Thisissuchadragtodo

Cheeeeeeeeese

"The pizza from an extremely goofy movie. The stringy cheese just looked magical lol" -- ES_Verified

"The pizza in the old TMNT cartoon as well." -- gate_of_steiner85

"Only bested by the pizza from All Dogs Go to Heaven." -- Purdaddy

Get a Big Old Chunk

"Those giant turkey drumsticks in old cartoons that characters would tear huge chunks out of. Those things looked amazing, turkey drumsticks in real life suck and are annoying to eat."

-- Ozwaldo

Slurp, Slurp, Slurp

"Every bowl of ramen on any anime, ever." -- Cat_xox

"Studio Ghibli eggs and bacon" -- DrManhattan_DDM

"Honestly, any food in anime. I swear to god half the budget no matter what the studio goes into making the food look absolutely delicious." -- Viridun

Finally, some highlighted the things that aren't quite so far-fetched, but still far enough away that it's nothing we'll be eating anytime soon.

That tease can be enough to make your mouth water.

What's In It??

"Butter beer" -- Damn_Dog_Inappropes

"came here to say this. i was pretty disappointed with the universal studio version which was over the top sweet. it was more of a butterscotch root beer. i imagine butter beer to be something more like butter and beer, which wouldn't be crazy sweet, but would have a very deep rich flavor" -- crazyskiingsloth

Slice of the Future

"The microwave pizzas in back to the future two" -- biggiemick91

"I've been fascinated with those for years! They just look so good!" -- skoros

As Sweet As They Had

"The Turkish Delight from Lion Witch & Wardrobe. The real ones I had weren't bad but nothing special." -- spoon_shaped_spoon

"Came here to say this. I know it's a real thing, but I always imagined that it must have been amazing to betray your siblings over." -- la_yes

"You're used to freely available too sweet sweets. For a WW2 era schoolkid, it would have represented all the sweets for an entire year." -- ResponsibleLimeade



Here's hoping you made it through the list without going into kitchen for some snack you didn't actually need.

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