The Absolute Weirdest Compliments People Have Ever Received
Reddit user callmejari asked: 'What's the weirdest compliment you have received?'
Giving compliments is pretty easy, although most of us don't do it often enough.
Accepting compliments can be much harder.
Too many of us immediately shift into disclaimers to explain why we don't deserve the praise.
But we just need to say thank you—even if the compliment is a little odd.
Reddit user callmejari asked:
"What's the weirdest compliment you have received?"
"Someone once told me that my voice was so soothing, it could put a crying baby sloth to sleep."
What About My Sneeze?
"'Your cough sounds nice' Was just a random girl on the train."
"Still throws me off 2 years later."
Hope It’s Not SpongeBob
"A 5-year-old kid told me he liked me because I looked like a cartoon."
“You look like Post Malone but when he was poor.”
The Better To Blow With
"Someone once told me my nostrils were a nice size."
"I have nice wide birthing hips."
"I'm a guy."
"You got the foundation for it, you're just missing the plumbing."
"'I like you because I'm into unattractive guys'. Thanks?"
Wrong Hemisphere, But Thanks
"When I was 16 working the drive thru—'You’re the prettiest Arabic girl I’ve ever seen'."
"I’m Mexican. But thank you ma’am."
Was His Name Vlad?
"'You've got beautiful veins'."
"By the guy that injected my contrast before an MRI."
~ Reblax837Werner Herzog Halloween GIF by Arrow VideoGiphy
It Keeps My Teeth In Place
"Some random NYC man told me I had a nice chin once. I still think about him."
Never Skip Leg Day
"I was told by a woman walking behind me on stairs that I had great calves."
"It was kind of weird at the time."
Not The BBQ Ones
"'I like your ribs'."
"From random girl at a pool party during a music festival."
Cleaning Up On Aisle 5
"I delivered bread to grocery stores in the 90’s and when I decided to change routes, the young lady who had always checked me in told me she’d really miss the sound of my voice."
"One time I was at the doctor for some lower back pain getting an ultra sound and the tech looked me dead in the eye and said 'You have really nice kidneys. They're very plump.'"
"Best strange compliment I ever received."
"'You walk like a cat'."
"'Aww... You sneeze just like a cat!'."
A compliment is a compliment, right?
What's the weirdest compliment you've received?
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Reddit user Moo1124 asked: 'What's the stupidest thing you've ever heard anyone say?'
We've all had a conversation with someone where they say something where they've said something incorrect or inaccurate.
Sometimes, our gut reaction is just to laugh, as it was an honest mistake, such as mixing up a pair of celebrities or misusing or mispronouncing a word.
Other times, we might feel the need to put them in their place and not only correct them but educate them.
Then there are the times when we have just heard something so shockingly inane that we are left completely and utterly speechless.
Redditor Moo1124 was eager to hear all the dumb things the Reddit community heard which left them dumbfounded, leading them to ask:
"What's the stupidest thing you've ever heard anyone say?"
Before You Denounce Something, Make Sure You Know What It Is
"'I don't believe in astronomy'."
"We asked her if she meant astrology, and she asked, 'which is the one where like, you can tell what stars are made of?''
"We confirmed that was astronomy'."
"'Yeah, I don't believe in that'."- octohog
That Explains All The Traffic Jams?
"That when you press on the horn of your car, it lowers the amount of air in your front right tire due to it helping make that horn sound."- Boomstick123456
"I was walking around the ruins of the ancient cliff dwellings at Mesa Verde just outside of Mancos, Colorado, (where the Ancient Puebloans lived from approximately 550 A.D. to 1300 A.D.) when a visitor asked the tour guide:"
"'Why did they build their homes so far from the highway?'"- badwolf1013driving los angeles GIF by HOLLYWOOD LOVE STORYGiphy
“'I can shoot with my left hand, I can shoot with my right hand, I'm amphibious'."- Master_Grape5931
Racist No Matter What...
"Apparently when my daughter was first born she looked vaguely East Asian."
"Enough, at least, for the nurses to ask if I was sure it was my baby."
"Now that was an incredibly weird thing to say to a new dad meeting his daughter for the first time, but it wasn't the stupidest thing someone said about this situation."
"That happened when I was retelling the above story to a client in a meeting."
"He asked to see a photo of my kid as a newborn, remarked how she really did 'look Asian', and then proceeded to ask if I thought my child might end up having an Asian accent when she got older."- JoeyCalamaro
"Where are you from, China or Asia?"- SonaPen22Cbs No GIF by HULUGiphy
When Life Gives You Lemons
"Asked someone if they drove a stick."
"They responded, 'no, I drive a car'."
"Now I have a dad joke I’ll remember forever."- 99problemsbut
"I once found a big bulldog in my back yard."
"I don't own a bulldog."
"He was a big friendly, but slow witted guy."
"He look healthy and had a collar but no tags so I knew he was a local."
"I made sure he had water and went to the front yard to start knocking on doors."
"As soon as I stepped outside I saw the family three houses down all gathered in their front yard."
"So another case closed for our young detective."
"I walked over to them and said, 'You guys missing a bulldog?'"
"The mother looked at me and said, 'Is his name Tyson?'"
"The question took me aback."
"I mean, he didn't have tags."
"They knew he didn't have tags."
"So all I could think to say was, 'He didn't say'."
"'But I'm pretty sure he's yours'."
"To this day I wonder if that woman knew how dumb that question was."- Spodsonlooks stupid english bulldog GIFGiphy
Under The Influence
"Stoned friend ."
"What year is February in?'"- IHave47Teeth
"My teacher told a class of 16-17 year olds about that super loyal dog in Japan who walked to the train station daily for nine years to wait for his owner, who died at work."
"After hearing that story, a girl raised her hand and asked 'Why didn't somebody just tell the dog?'"- Senator_Ruth_Martin
That's Why The FDA Warns Against It...
"When I was 12 years old a friend told me 'smoking is good for you because the smoke makes a shield around your heart when you breathe it in'."
"He argued that the smoke could prevent you from being stabbed or shot."
"Even at 12 I knew he was a moron."- ipondy
There's Denying Global Warming, And Then...
"Solar panels will cause a global ice age, because the law of thermodynamics states energy cannot be created or destroyed, so obviously they must be removing heat from the air."
"With no sense of irony of the scale nor efficiency (or lack thereof) of solar panels and their capacity to cool."- peptobiscuit
In Debt, Maybe...
"I knew a Finance major in college who thought he was worth $20k because he had two credit cards with $10k limit each."- alano134
No one loves a know-it-all.
Especially when they don't actually know anything at all...
Shoplifting is a prevalent issue, but why do people do it?
Some reasons can be as banal as boredom, but other are far more intruiging.
Redditor WineOhCanada wanted to understand why people steal, so they asked:
"People who shoplift on the regular: why do you do it?"
I loved shoplifting.
Until I was caught, that is. I was a price tag switcher.
So ExcitedHappy Thomas Lennon GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy
"It makes me feel alive. Jk I don't any more but as a kid, it was for sure a thrill thing."
"I’m going to give an actual honest answer as someone who has not done this in many years… it becomes addicting."
"Came here to say this. Back in my high school days, I would do it all the time. It's like a rush. Now my shoplifting days are when I forgot the can of soup on the bottom of the grocery cart and don't realize til I'm loading it in the car."
"I used to work in loss prevention. A lot of times we would let you go; especially teenagers. We knew you would be back and have pictures on the wall of you. We focused on shoplifting rings with a higher dollar amount and employees. Employees rob you blind."
"I was greedy and had poor impulse control. While shoplifting was terrifying... having the shiny new thing after gave me a dopamine hit. I got caught three or four times and I thank Christ I was under 18 each and every time."
"It was less about greed for me I think, I've never been addicted to any drugs, whenever I got caught I would always test negative for anything, the custody sergeant who would take my fingerprints/DNA/drug swab would say 'Sean you're the only one that comes in regular that's not on any drugs, what's going on?' I explained that I was homeless, lost my job because the company I worked for folded, and life just kicked me in the butt."
"Flirty Chez I called her, and she would always give me extra food whenever I was brought in, I just thought that was how she was, then one day she said I need a girlfriend and I shot her down, no more flirty Chez. She was shooting her shot and I rejected her without even knowing it."
"Much to my mom’s embarrassment, I was a serial shoplifter as a baby. At least I had the presence of mind to take off my socks and shoes and leave them scattered around the store in exchange."
"I was once on a camping trip with my parents. We left the campsite for a day and when we got back our soap had been stolen from the tent. Just our soap, nothing else was taken, but we did find the shoes of the perpetrator!"
"This kid left them right at the entrance of our tent, so it was not difficult to find out who did it. When we went to get the soap back and give him back his shoes, sadly the kid threw it over a fence, so we never got it back."
InfluencesBreaking Bad Crying GIFGiphy
"My easily influenced mind was corrupted by TV. If it's good enough for Marie Schrader then it's good enough for me."
TV rots your brains and decision making capabilities.
Do the opposite of your favorite characters.
End of TimesNbc Shoplifting GIF by SuperstoreGiphy
"When I was bedridden due to Covid, I had a friend who shoplifted a whole damn box worth of medicine from different drugstores."
"I was very impressed and confused, as I didn't ask for it. Great friend though!"
"As a former loss prevention officer, most of the people I stopped were stealing to resell the items. Many people were clearly drug addicts and many people I stopped had meth and other drugs on them. Not every shoplifter is stealing to buy drugs, but a ton of them are."
"A lot of other people just stole items they wanted, and some people just have a stealing problem and would take whatever random BS they came across and thought would be easy to steal. If I ever saw someone stealing food I'd usually look the other way, but that was pretty rare to see someone taking food, it was usually clothes, electronics, makeup, or tools."
"Addiction. And that's addiction to shoplifting, not drugs. It's a rush. Confidence grows with each success. It becomes an obsession. It brings an amount of power when stealing from giant corporations. For me, this question is similar to asking an addict why they are addicted to drugs or alcohol."
"I haven't shoplifted in three years. I attended Shoplifters Anonymous and continue to go to therapy which are both very helpful. I'm very lucky I didn't lose everything."
"In high school, I dated this guy who would shoplift and I got influenced to start doing it. After we broke up I kept doing it all throughout college since I was a broke college student who had no self-control. I only shoplifted from big retail stores and told myself it was 'okay.' Post college I stopped because the possible consequences as an adult and to my career were not worth it."
There was no good in it
"I used to do it as a means to support my drug habit. I wouldn't call what I was doing shoplifting though. I moved the volume and high-end merchandise. Honda generators from Home Depot or Lowe's. Shopping carts full of Tide pods, and Similac baby formula. I'd hit Nordstrom during the holidays for their perfumes and colognes. COACH, Burberry for purses."
"I made a good chunk of change from it, yet I was still homeless. Most of my money went to drugs, and hotel rooms at shi**y hotels. I'm no longer like this. I reached out and went to rehab this past July. I now have 132 days clean and sober, and work an honest job. My life's boring as hell now and I love it. Even though people on the street complimented and applauded my skills."
"I was never proud of myself for any of the stealing I was doing. There was no good in it. Now I feel good about myself and can be proud of what I do. It's a nice feeling to go into a store and not have to be aware of my surroundings and not tighten up when the greeters ask for a receipt. Because now, I can happily show them one. Lol."
Think FirstSteve Austin Wrestling GIF by WWEGiphy
"I work for a 3-letter retail store in NV and we have a ton of theft. I see a lot of random products for sale on the FB marketplace. If it adds up to over $1,200 it’s grand larceny and you get arrested."
"Walmart also allows up to a certain amount to be returned with no receipt and you get cash back."
What have we learned kids?
Theft never really pays.
Do you have any experiences? Let us know in the comments below.
The holiday season is lovely, but it's full of pressure to travel, plan, host, and of course, get gifts for a lot of people.
But the thing we don't really talk about is how common it is to want something specific and to not have someone in our life who tries to seek out what that thing is.
Unless we get it for ourselves, it's common that we won't get what we actually want.
Redditor GeneralSpectatorTots asked:
"What do you want for Christmas that you know you aren't going to get?"
"My brother to be sober and happy."
"I’m also trying to get sober. I wish your brother well. Keep being a support to him."
A New Home
"A house deposit."
"A house deposit? Just gift you a house!"
A Financial Advantage
"A winning lottery ticket."
"Every year I ask Santa. Every f**king year."
Grandma's Homecooked Meals
"One last meal from my grandma. She made the best food, and of course, you don't know the last time is going to be the last time until it's too late."
"Love from my parents."
"This mom is sending you a long hug."
A Professional Massage
"A gift certificate for a professional massage. I can't bring myself to spend the money on myself. I need to just bite the bullet and do it."
"I have asked for one every year for years. Sometimes it's the only thing I ask for from my parents and my partner (when they ask what I want)."
"I always get wonderful gifts that I love, use, and/or needed but I REALLY WANT A F**KING MASSAGE."
The Best Neighbor
"A card from my twin brother saying, 'Just kidding, I’m not moving to Washington, I actually found a place in your neighborhood!'"
Very Important Things
"Free Healthcare and a good used car for my husband."
The End to Ableism
"Independence and not being infantilized because I’m a 37-year-old disabled woman and no one in my family understands (extended family who all live within 10 mins of me)."
"Guilt-free travel! It's like asking for a never-ending vacation. How I wish I could just hop around the world without worrying about a thing!"
Sounds Like Paradise
"A pretty, and big apartment for me and my cat."
"For my cat to let me sleep through the night."
"A stress-free move, with eight days between closings of two houses four states apart, and four pets to manage in temporary housing. Help me, Santa, I’ve been a good girl."
Ready To Be Done!
"For my doctoral capstone paper to finally be approved so I can be done with school! Please, please, Santa, I’m on rewrite 19!"
Two Front Teeth
"My two front teeth... My two front teeth."
"But seriously, teeth."
"Mine are all falling out due to an autoimmune disease, and I need implants."
The Perfect Partner
"A partner to go on adventures with… have singalongs with… and who adores and truly sees me."
While we may have been expecting some silly responses, or even for someone to finally buy the right brand of a favorite candle or lotion or makeup, these responses were a great reminder of what's really important.
And unfortunately, many of the most important things can't be replaced or fit into a Christmas stocking.
Breaking up is hard to do no matter who initiated it.
But once time has passed and exes have moved on, the healing process can be jarred by a surprise.
A regretfilled person may try and make contact with the one they broke up with and ask for forgiveness, or the person who had their heart broken could also reappear and plead for a fresh new start.
The outcome depends on how much, or how little, the spark of love remains.
Curious to hear more of this scenario from strangers online, Redditor XenaVonKeksdose asked:
"What would you say to your ex if they suddenly showed up at your door?"
For these Redditors, it wouldn't be a happy reunion.
"It ranges from 'come on in and make yourself comfortable' to 'get the f'k out of here' , depending on which one shows up."
"Odds of it being the one who got away: low."
"Odds of it being the one who took 5 years to understand what 'f'k off' meant: pretty high."
It's A Nightmare
"Screaming. They've passed."
"Similar situation here. I did have a dream that my late wife showed up at my door. She said, 'There was a mix up at the coroner, you wouldn’t believe what I’ve been through.”'
"Still in the dream we talked for a bit about nothing. Then I said, 'Wait, what about the life insurance, do we have to pay it back?' And just after that I woke up."
"Slowly closes the door while maintaining eye contact."
"Also aggressively locks the door."
Some would show traces of resentment.
"The f'k do you want? And how did you get this address?"
Too Little Too Late
"You couldn't put in effort in messaging me, but you have effort now to see me months after we break up‽"
"Wait, if you’re here who’s running hell?”
"Who’s guarding HADES."
Hit 'Em Where It Hurts
"I lost weight... You seem to have found it."
"now get the f'k off my lawn."
Others shared less bitter responses.
"Honestly, I apologize. I know dealing with my prior alcoholism must have been a nightmare. I regret causing you and anyone else pain and hope you are happy. I am a year into sobriety and can understand why it ended. I wish you well."
"Edit: Since this is getting so much traction, I just want to say thanks for all the support. This could honestly be directed at a few of my exes. I am happily married now to someone that also got a taste of my drinking. We stuck it out while I got sober and I have to credit her with being an amazing support system. I also need to shout out r/stopdrinking for providing reinforcement on a daily basis. It is a great community. Naltrexone was also a major part of it. I can't change the past but I think I have a much better hold on the future."
Someone That I Used To Know
"I've been married for almost 25 years, I don't know if I would even recognize any exes."
"Yep. That person went from 'ex' to 'someone I once dated' years ago."
"I'm sorry for the way I treated you."
"Good on you for growing."
"I’d say hello! What are you doing here? It has been a long time."
Wish You Well
"A lot of snarky or comical answers in here, but I'll try to be as sincere as I can."
"My first major ex, first time I got my heart broken: I would sincerely hope that she's doing well. She broke my heart, but it was for the best and it made me into the man I am today. I don't want to think of how much worse I would be if she hadn't given me a reality check wake-up-call. So really just 'Hey, how have you been? I hope the years have been kind to you.'"
"My most recent ex, the first and only time I've had to break someone's heart: I honestly just hope that she can forgive me for having to make taking care of myself and my needs the priority in my life. She's an amazing woman, kindergarten school teacher, unanimously adored by everyone that meets her. But we met via travels, and lived in two different states. Circumstances shifted and seeing each other became much less frequent. Neither of us wanted to quit our jobs and chuck a grenade into our lives and careers. Eventually, for my own mental and emotional health, I had to call it. I truly hope she finds someone amazing, she deserves it. So I would just sincerely hope that she understands, and has moved on."
I once showed up at an exes door after I broke up with him about a month prior.
I genuinely loved and missed him after making the very difficult decision to end things due to conflicting circumstances that kept us from maintaining a healthy relationship.
But I quickly learned that if you did the breaking up, you should respect the other person's space for a respectable amount of time.
I went to visit him at the apartment where we lived together and a new lover answered the door for him after there was a long period of giggles and lots of feet shuffling from behind the door.
Clearly, he was doing just fine.
Of course, I wasn't welcomed in and was asked what I wanted, to which I had no answer but, "do you have any mail for me?"