Travel Enthusiasts Share The Worst Case Scenarios They've Found Themselves In During Vacation
Travel can lead to memories and adventures unattainable in your home town. Architecture and memorials to civilizations long gone, and interactions with a populace from a completely different upbringing. It's a treat for anyone, except for those people that fear something bad will happen 14,000 miles away from home, far from their couch and Commercial-Free Hulu subscription. Getting lost or forgetting your hotel room key or having a literal nightmare scenario in the airplane bathroom is very possible, as evidenced by these Reddit answers to user, r/fizio900, when they asked:
Travelers of Reddit, what's the worst scenario you found yourself in?
With Help Like this...
Was in Cambodia, group of men trying to mug me. Spot a police officer very close by. I look at him for help, he proceeds to also demand for my money.
At the time it was a bit of a prickly situation but today it makes me laugh just thinking about how I felt when I finally understood the cop was also trying to rob me.
Making A Bad Situation Terrible
Wife and I dined out at a remote town in Italy. Wife decided to take a short cut out of parking lot and ended up in a ditch. The only chef and waiter came out to help. Chef ended up twisting ankle badly. Waiter brought his car and tied a rope to mine to pull it out. His bumper ripped off. All the while we were communicating through gestures because I didn't speak Italian and they English.
I Guess Say Thanks?
My husband and I were on a road trip through Romania when part of the car started to come off. I don't know what it's called, but it was like a plastic piece that went from one side of the car to the other right in front of the wheels, sort of like a guard. One side of it had come loose, so it was just dragging on the ground. The broken part was really frayed, as if it had been working its way loose for some time before we ever got the car. We were in the middle of nowhere at the time and the only way we could see to solve the problem was to cut off the guard on the other side, but we didn't have a knife. It was fairly awkward to drive with this piece dragging on the ground and so we didn't want to risk trying to find a proper mechanic (and also, it was Sunday...)
This guy drove up to us as we were parked by the road, and he was like... well, imagine an American guy named Bubba from Alabama who drives a pickup truck with a Confederate flag and only listens to country music. This was clearly the Romanian version of that guy. We indicated the issue and mimed cutting it off with a knife, and this redneck went to his truck, pulled out a large knife, and sliced the piece off for us. We thanked him, and he tossed the piece on the back of his truck and drove away.
Ew, Ew, Ew
When I was about 10 I was at a run down French train station in the middle of nowhere, and I had to take a sh-t like nobody's business. So I go to the restroom and find out that there's no toilets, just holes in the ground. Apparently, the process for sh-tting in a hole in the ground is you pee first, and then poop.
But being the champion that I am I decided to go for both at the same time. Ended up peeing directly into my pulled down pants and then had to sit inTHEM for a 3 hour train ride back home.
Clowns To The Left, Smokers To The Right
Having the middle seat on a flight from Los Angeles to Auckland.
Quite A Pickle
We were crossing the border from Malaysia to Thailand over a bridge. As we were making our way across no man's land, this local looking guy ran out of nowhere in his underpants chased by 2 guys. He got to the Malaysian side and a soldier put his hand up to say he couldn't go through. He did a U turn, dodged the 2 guys chasing him and ran to the Thai side. Again, a soldier put up his hand to stop him. He did another U turn, dodged the guys, tried to jump on a scooter, but as he was taking off, they pulled him off the scooter. He got away from them again, but was stuck on the bridge with no way out.
We got to the Thai side, checked into Thailand and to this day, still wonder how the hell he ended up almost naked, in no man's land, with 2 pissed off guys after him.
When Coming To Jersey Is Traveling Abroad
We once traveled to visit friends in Camden, New Jersey, who had their first apartment in the downtown area.
When it was time to drive home, we found that the wheels had been removed from our car and the vehicle was sitting on blocks. (Thankfully, they left the interior alone.)
When You're A Spy But You Didn't Know
I was in Berlin when it was a divided city. To go from West Berlin to East Berlin I, as a US citizen, went through Checkpoint Charlie. Some friends and I were meeting in East Berlin for dinner one night. We were traveling separately. The thing to realize is that once you were on East Berlin soil, you were on your own. If there were any problems, I was told to seek help from the Russian occupiers. (The Cold War was still real, so this was just surreal) We were to have limited to no contact with the East German military or police. So, I get through Checkpoint Charlie and walk into East German soil. I stopped at their checkpoint - it was like a little horse stall were you stood and had the Easy German military look at your passport. I handed it over. He looked at it, said something in German. I said I didn't speak German. He began accusing me of being a spy. I was escorted out of the "stall" and into a very plain holding room with a bench running the length of the room. That's all that was there. I remained standing. It was January and really cold. I wondered what my friends would do when I didn't show up as planned.
About 30 minutes later, two soldiers came into the room, handed me my passport, and let me go.
I drank a lot that night.
Lesson? Don't Take Pictures Of Russian Tanks
Your story reminded me of when two of my friends were arrested by the Russian military as teenagers. Their story is less terrifying than yours, though.
They were American high schoolers on a trip abroad for school, and they were out during their free time walking around. They saw some tanks sitting behind a fence in front of a building, so they stopped to take pictures. From what they said, out of nowhere they heard shouting and were confronted by two very angry Russian soldiers. They were brought to an interrogation room and held there while the soldiers took their passports and went to find someone who spoke English. They finally found someone, and he came in and tried to interview them, but by that time they were both sobbing, terrified messes who could barely answer any questions. They were convinced they were going to be put in prison. The interviewer realized he was dealing with hysterical, stupid kids and not spies, gave them back their passports, told them to enjoy the rest of the day, and let them go. Let them keep the pictures too.
Luck Is Thy Middle Name
Got stuck in Sydney. Gigantic cluster of a day.
Took the rail to the airport 3 hours early to go back to US. Went to check in and realized my passport was back in the hotel. In attempt to still make flight, took a luxury cab back to hotel. Got it, and sped back. Expensive. Got back to airport, ran in, but still missed flight. Went to reschedule/reorder tickets for next available, realized my wallet was missing. Now no cash. Ran back to cab, but was already gone. Tried to call company but my world phone was running out of minutes and charge---with no credit cards or cash to recharge. Was my birthday.
Ultimately was able to reach my wife who arranged a stay at nearby hostel and rescheduled flight the next day.
Cabby ended up showing back up at the airport much later that day, and I asked if I could search cab. I ended up finding wallet in between the seat cushions. Crazy. Day.
Maybe It's Not Always So Bad
My brother spent the summer one year living with a friend in a family friend's summer home in this tiny Mexican surfing town. Another family friend lived close by and had taken them out to lunch that day at a tiny non-descript restaurant, about 30 minutes by car, in a much poorer / non-expat town nearby.
My brother forgot his camera at the restaurant. He likes photography quite a bit, so I don't know anything about cameras but I do know he spent upwards of a grand on it. Tried calling our family friend but couldn't get a response and the sun was going to set relatively soon, so he got on a bus, which was actually just more of a hop on hop off system of VW-esque buses, where bus stops were only based on landmarks (Stop at the bridge. Stop at the purple house, etc). He rode this system of buses for about an hour and a half to get to the town based on what looks familiar. Wandered around for a while and tried to find anything that looked familiar to get to this restaurant.
By this point the sun has gone down completely, and he's this gringo kid walking around some Mexican town he doesn't know, and only speaks the broken basic Spanish of someone who grew up in Texas / Florida / California / Arizona / New Mexico knows just by osmosis.
So walking around in near darkness, phone's dead, he started getting pretty nervous when this guy starts yelling down the street at him. He can't understand what he's saying so he just stands there until he realises this guy screaming at him is also running at him. So he books it. Starts sprinting away -- no idea where he's going, while this guy is chasing and yelling at him in Spanish until he finally hears the guy yell camara.
So he stopped, the guy caught up, and after some poor Spanglish and a lot of pantomime, he figures out that this guy's family owns the restaurant they ate at where he left his camera. So this guy walks my brother back to the restaurant (he had actually gotten pretty close by dumb luck and 'things that looked familiar'). The guy's mum opened up the kitchen again to make him more food than he could eat. Refused when he offered to give them money for the camera, or even for the food they gave him. Made their son accompany my brother on the bus back to the town my brother was staying in. And the mum packed extra food to give him to take home as he left.
Better Lesson: Don't Mess Around In Russia
My -sshole co-worker thought it would be a great idea to be an ahole to the police while on a business trip in Russia. The cops arresting him and asked him for his passport. He proudly whips out his US passport and tells the cops off they be not dare touch an "American". The cop takes his passport, his phone, and wallet and proceeds to throw it down a sewer and arrest him as an undocumented foreigner.
He ended up sitting in a Russia jail for 8 months before [the] US Embassy was allowed to see. He spent three years in prison in Russia before he was released. When he came back he looked like he was 30 years older, lost most his teeth, and went from a muscle bound 220 pound to somebody who weighed 160 pounds.
Overseas Healthcare Is Great
While traveling in Greece, my son had an accident - a large boulder crushed his foot. Lots of blood, lots of broken bones. I held pressure against the wound on the way to the hospital in aN ambulance. It would not stop bleeding even with pressure. Finally get to the hospital, they wheel him to the most sub standard emergency room you can imagine. It was closer to a Russian prison cell than a place for medical care. Dirty, dark, multiple people laying on stretchers. They put my son between two people, one of whom looks like an enforcer for the Russian mob - BIG guy, like muscle big, not fat big, about 6 foot 6 inches. Tattoos, unhappy disposition, with cuts on his shaved head. While the doctor starts inspecting my sons foot (no pain medication, jamming his fingers in the wound and adjusting bones), Mr. Mob Enforcer starts to argue with the doctor who is working on my son. Presumably they were refusing him service and asking him to leave. In a matter of about 30 seconds the argument escalated to the point where Mr. Mob is standing over the doctor, screaming at the top of his lungs, fingers in the doctors face, being very threatening. The doctor still has my sons foot in his hands, trying to provide care. It is at that moment it becomes clear I may need to wrap my arms around Mr. Mobs neck so that the doctor can continue to provide care to my son. I am just waiting for some physical contact before intervening in a situation guaranteed to not end in my favor. At the last second, a very small diminutive security guard arrives and gets involved.
Very thankfully, the guy turns around and storms out, and the Dr. goes back to working on my son.
Everything about that situation makes me sick to my stomach when I think back on it. The fear of your child being hurt, the fear of uncertain outcome, the fear of being in a situation where your child wellbeing is out of your control, the fear of putting yourself in they way of certain physical harm to protect your child. NOT F.U.N all around.
Silver lining. 3 day hospital bill, $200 USD.
Dodging A Literal Bullet
My family and I were took a 16 day trip across Europe a few years ago. We were supposed to get on the 11am train to Paris from Munich that morning, but we all had gotten up early and decided to take the 9am train instead. Found out later there was an incident with an armed gunman on the train we were initially planning on taking.
Making The Large March Home
When I was 18 I went travelling around Europe by myself, one of the things I wanted to do was visit the beaches at Normandy and because I love band of brothers I decided to stay in Carentan. While I was there I got a train/bus to the American military cemetery and spent a few hours there and at Omaha beach and then went back to catch my bus, I somehow however managed to miss the last bus by about 10 minutes and with it being a Sunday everything was closed early. So I was stuck in Normandy 20ish miles from my B and B, my phone battery was nearly dead and so I had to make a decision between trying to find an English speaking taxi firm or to use it for maps.
My stupid 18 year old self decided it'd be better to walk it, 6 hours and a few sketchy looking French villages later I got back to my room and stuck my mouth under the tap in my bathroom, because to top it all off I had no food or water with me at the time.
Fulfilling Your Promises
Was leaving the Forbidden City in Beijing with my Chinese buddy. Right outside there's a ton of touts trying to sell us jade dragons. We ignore them and try making our way to the street. My buddy bumps into this tout and the tout says something to him. All of a sudden my buddy starts flipping out, yelling and screaming, shaking his fists at the tout. They start pushing eachother and a crowd forms to watch.
All of a sudden I see like ten rough looking Chinese guys materialize. They're balling up, I see brass knuckles on one of them. I don't mind a good fight, but I don't want to see what the medical care inside a Chinese jail is like either. I grab my buddy by the shoulder and start pulling him away from the tout. He's still screaming.
We eventually get to the street and he gets out his phone to call a cab. My buddy says that the tout called him "the white man's dog" or something to that effect. I ask him how long the taxi will be and he says "No, I'm just calling my friends. We're gonna come back and f-ck those guys up later"
I had my wallet/ID stolen in Ireland while roughly 5 hours away from where all my other stuff was. By the time I was able to get back to my hotel and cancel my cards, the thief had already spent 1200 dollars.
I was in Guangzhou, China at a trade fair and at the end of the day I was SO tired plus I was jetlagged and just wanted to go to my hotel room and sleep.
There was a line for the Taxis (think of Disney attraction lines, like velvet ropes that zigzag through a hall) and there were like 200 people in line. I was like fuuck I don't wanna stand in line for an hour so I walked towarda the metro station (it was like a 45 min metro ride to my hotel) and then some guy walks beside me, looks both ways and says to me "private taxi?" And I was like "yes please" guy told me "wait here" took my briefcase and left and came back in a brand new honda Accord, I hop in the back and off we go..
Like three blocks from there we stopped at a red light and suddenly some guy opens the passenger door, jumps in, and takes the key off the ignition, another guy opens the driver's door grabs this dude by the shirt collar drags him out of the car a throws him on the ground, and the first guy (the guy with the key) goes around and turns on the car locks the doors and drives away with me in the back..
I was 1000% sure I was being kidnapped. In China of all places. I was like f-ck f-ck f-ck f-ck now what? My heart was at like 250 bpm. We drove in silence for like 5 mins and it felt like an hour. Then we turns at a dead end street, pulls over, turns around, looks at me, reaches for his pocket.. and whips out a badge.
He was an undercover policeman. And there was a sting to catch illegal taxis. Which ironically often kidnapped tourists. Dude takes out a video camera a makes me tell him how everything went down, hoW much I paid him etc. So in some courtroom in China there was a video of me testifying against some dude that probably went to jail thanks to me.
The policeman then went to the street waved at a taxi with his badge out and put me in the cab and told me never to take anything other than the cars that were painted like this. (This was before uber was around).
It was scary but thankfully nothing bad happened.
This Is My Nightmare
I was an hour into a 9 hour international flight. I started feeling ill and went to the lavatory. I sat in the toilet with the lid down and leaned against the sink splashing some water in my face. Next thing I knew, everything faded out.
A woke up crumpled on the floor and completely disoriented. It took me a moment to get uncontorted and to get up. I was dizzy and shivering. I looked down and I had vomited all over myself. In addition, I peed and soiled myself.
Edit: Ironically, I'm about to get on an airplane but when I land and get settled I'll describe the aftermath.
Edit: The Aftermath - once I got clarity, I really had little choice. There were no clothes in my carryon, a big mistake and one I would never make again traveling international. I had been in India, and on the last day felt a little off. After a long delay, long flight and long layover in London I was tired and my stomach was gurgling. I wasn't sick, but I didn't feel right...
...After waking up, I washed and cleaned as best I could everything. It took a while, and thankfully it came out as well as I could hope. Especially since the hardest stains were on the inside of my pants (sigh). I emerged from the lavatory soaked from head to toe, probably with a thousand yard stare. I went to my seat which was on a right side aisle, grabbed a blanket and wrapped up in it as I started shivering. Instantly the person next to me hit the attendant button and requested that he and his wife be seated elsewhere since I was obviously ill. She relocated them, and the entire row was empty except for an Asian woman on the other end. She stared over several times and had a medical mask on. Poor lady. I fell asleep not long after and woke up feeling better on the inside but a wet, crusty, nasty mess otherwise. In Chicago, I switched to a flight to St. Louis which is my home airport and arrived home incredibly tired. I took a shower, slept two hours, then took my kids to Six Flags for the Halloween thing. It was the last weekend the park was open, and having been divorced in the last year, I had promised them no matter what I would take them. THAT, was the longest night of my life. But I was just tired from there, not sick.
People who talk smack about others are often viewed as rude individuals.
But sometimes, they are taking the hit for not exercising tact. The truth is, they might be verbalizing about a situation we have secretly thought about but keep to themselves.
When it comes to reserving judgment about people and their situations, many of us can relate to this. It is what separates us from those who aren't able to keep their observations to themselves.
"What's something you secretly judge people about?"
People seeking validation in excess on the internet are met with criticism.
Social Media Portrayal
"What part of their life are they posting on social media."
"My husband has a friend who has a psycho girlfriend that posts really personal sh*t online. Like, she sent her boyfriend some racy photos and he didn't 'react like he should have' so she shared them online with a comment about how she thought the photos were sexy and he must not find her attractive anymore. I was embarrassed for her. She also likes to make up stories about him hitting her then update a few hours later that she's sorry and she lied and he didn't hit her. And these people are in their 30s with children and still acting like that."
"What they say about their kids in social media. I get that being a parent is hard and it's okay to talk/vent/be real about that online, but sometimes people cross the line and talk about their kids as if they're not real people, just because they're not grown and don't have a Facebook account. People should imagine what their kids would think of they were all grown up and reading your internet history. If you think they would be hurt by what you said, don't post it."
Headphones are there for a reason. But these offenders are not considerate enough to use them.
"People who use speaker phone for music or conversations in public places. I hate it."
"My roommate uses speaker at all times. We'll be watching TV and he will literally answer the phone and talk on speaker. One time had the audacity to say me and this other guy wouldn't stop talking and he couldn't hear his gf. Same with music too, he'll play some some music in the middle of whatever I'm watching. Annoying as all f'k."
"My old roommate would use speaker to talk to her family at college so I joined the conversation the entire time, she constantly told me to 'shut the f'k up' in front of her mom, so I said 'then dont use speaker dumba**.'"
Views from entitled people might say the following:
"How they treat janitors/custodial staff and whether people leave more of a mess than they should because 'it's their job to clean up after me.'"
"How snobbish another person reacts to someone else's situation. I. E. When someone finds out information about another persons wage, job, family situation, living situation, etc etc etc, and making a comment on it."
Do you ever feel like your ears are burning? Yeah, it's probably because of people like these:
"People that gossip to me about other people. I always wonder what they say about me behind my back."
"One of my favorite office tricks is to gossip relentlessly, but to keep it at least 90% positive. People can and do find out that I've been going around, behind their backs, and spreading rumors about how great they are."
"Obviously it creates a nice work environment, but by being willing to gossip, people are more willing to tell me things that aren't necessarily public yet."
What annoys me about the things people do have more to do with my growing impatience after having lived in New York City for over a decade.
Customers in fast food joints not knowing what to order after being in line for a sufficient amount of time grates me.
The increasing convenience of mobile ordering has been the best thing to come out of the pandemic that has kept me from losing my marbles.
Wherever we go, there are social norms and expectations being jammed down our throats.
The people around us, all exposed to similar media messages and massive, powerful institutions, internalize these norms and police each other without even realizing it.
These constructs are so plentiful and subtle that they can be hard to even notice.
But once in awhile we take a step back. We zoom out. Then we see just how arbitrary and one-dimensional so many of those norms are.
Those epiphanies can be disorienting, but so empowering, too. A recent thread on Reddit asked people to share their biggest gripes about all the things forced on us.
Redditor Snoo79382 asked:
"What should society stop forcing on us?"
The internet, as it has many facets of modern life, has accelerated the rate at which things are jammed down our throats. Not a day goes by that we're not on the hook for one thing or another.
"Subscription based services. Everybody out here wants your money now on a monthly schedule."
"The need to create an account for EVERY website or software. Wtf, I just want to install my graphics drivers! There's no reason for you to know who I am, you already have many thousands of my monies."
Others discussed work and work culture. It's such a large portion of our lives, and, according to these folks, the whole thing can be handled better.
Resist the Urge to Monetize
"The idea of hobbies becoming 'side hustles.' Why can't a hobby just be a hobby" -- Electrical-Mammoth44
"Like my father always said: Don't turn your hobby into your work, because you'll have to find a new hobby." -- JustAGuy401
"Having to constantly be busy and only have 2 days to recover from it." -- Octo-Fishy
"I find the whole 5 days a week on, 2 off thing pretty infuriating. I work a 9-5 and would easily be done everything in way less time but I am required to drag it out for no reason." -- condor1111800
Passing the Buck
"Donating your vacation time to coworkers because the company you work for is shi**y. There was a natural disaster and one of the stores in the chain I worked for got flooded."
"Instead of just giving people time off because they literally couldn't work they asked everyone to give up the few paid days off we got a year. Most of us got less than a week off a year."
And others talked about the social expectations pushed on us by our friends, family members, acquaintances, and everything in between.
Aren't There Plenty Already?
"Well no one is forcing anyone, but everyone assumes you want from have kids. And if you don't everyone has a lot of questions and they start judging and trying to change your mind."
Take Your Time
"The idea that people should have their sh*t together and their life planned out at the age of 20. I'm 19 and still wanna play my pokemon games and the future scares me :')"
"The belief that you HAVE to date, have sex, and get married. Some of us don't want to do any of that and there's nothing wrong with it. I'm sick of the social pressure to date."
Racing Against Fantasy
"There should be laws about how heavily photoshopped pictures are meant to be to sell anything beauty related."
"Being constantly surrounded by images of perfection is seriously damaging to people's mental health, and the implication that a product will make you look Like This is simply false advertising when the model doesn't actually look Like This and has been heavily airbrushed at the very least."
And so, taking a cue from these Redditors, it's a good time to remember that we don't have to cave to any of this stuff if we don't want to.
It's always fun to be a little naughty, isn't it? We all have that urge to pickpocket a little something now and again. (Not that we should, that would be wrong, unless it's from Walmart; I jest.)
But we all love to dabble in the devious, the feeling can break up the monotony of the day.
That's why it's always fun to sometimes participate in an action or be aware of a knowledge that feels like it should get us arrested.
It maybe naughty but it ain't illegal.
Redditor u/poisionivey3 wanted to see who was willing to spill some secret tea by asking:
What's a piece of information you know that feels illegal to know?
Eating grapes for testing at the grocery store. Everyone does it. Is it technically illegal? Does that count? I mean as long as I don't treat it like Golden Coral, I should fine, yet it feels so mischievous.
Pick-Up Artistcarmen ejogo starz GIF by The Girlfriend ExperienceGiphy
"I'm trying to lockpick. I'm terrified how easy was pick my bicycle lock. My first attempt and it took 5 minutes."
"We can all easily find out what people paid for their house. Seems kind of personal, but it's very public. Same with divorce records."
"People being able to look up that crap is obnoxious as a semi-new homeowner. Spammers scour that crap, so the first 6 months 90% of your mail is trying to sell you mortgage insurance (the home equivalent of the car "extended waranTEE" scam calls), and a fair number of the telemarketer calls I get are people trying to purchase my house (I haven't listened to any of those long enough to know what the angle is there)."
"Elvis Presley's autopsy will be released in 2027."
In the Air
"According to what a flight attendant told me, the TVs on airplanes that charge you to watch aren't connected to the wifi when they're at the gate, so you can scan any card that resembles a debit card. They just store the info to be charged later, so if you give them a bogus card, you might still be able to get free tv."
the megDog Reaction GIFGiphy
"Nutmeg, when eaten in large quantities, is a psychedelic drug that can cause hallucinations, coma, or even death."
Nutmeg for the high? Now I wish I had known that sooner! Also, I never thought about lockpicking being shady. So many useful tips here. Let's see who else is a bandit in the making.
Vanced...youtube oh no you didnt GIFGiphy
"Youtube Vanced is a free app that's basically Youtube premium without spending money."
"Really (before 1997/98 or so) old microsoft product keys relied on a REALLY simple validity check. They were numbers in the form XXXX-YYYYYYY. The first 4 digits were specific to the software (I think Office 97 was 0402?) and fixed. The last 7 .. the check was just that the sum of all digits has to be able to be divided by 7 without rest. So 1111111 worked all the time. 1234567 worked all the time, 7777777 did."
10 Items or Less
"If your local Walmart is closed overnight but there are employees working there, the doors probably aren't locked and the self check registers are on. There's actually nothing keeping you from going in there, picking up a few items, using self checkout and walking out. I work at Walmart overnight and this guy did that a couple nights ago. He didn't speak English and when a manager noticed him they actually just escorted him to grab his items, check out and go."
Show me thew $$$
"How much my coworkers make."
"How a lot of places just let you and a friend in if you wear a construction vest and helmet and carry a ladder."
"Back in the day, we used to go to this very popular night club, where people started lining up at 6pm. Met a guy inside partying one night wearing an orange construction vest. He said he bypassed the entire line and they let him right in the door, because he was wearing that vest and carrying a clipboard. He told the bouncers he was the Fire Marshal."
On the Tarmacsi2 GIF by Solar ImpulseGiphy
"If you want to disrupt an airport it is usually super easy to drive, walk, boat etc onto the tarmac directly and security will rarely notice you before you're already causing problems. Used to write marketing copy for security companies. 90% of our airport copy was "hey wanna have some security on the back end? no? maybe?"
Ok, I'm totally trying that air traffic, runway thing. Though this really makes me feel even more anxious about our airport security. Like... how is that possible? I'm gonna need more Xanax for my next flight.
We've all said something stupid, let's not lie to ourselves.
It's okay to say something stupid. It showcases the real person on the inside, that we're all flawed, imperfect, and made of cooky combinations of words that don't necessarily line up to make sense. Sometimes we're nervous in a situation, other times we're just hitting 'Quick Reply' in our brains and what comes out doens't work, but whatever the reason, you for sure are going to remember it, late at night, for the rest of your life.
What is the stupidest thing that ever came out of your mouth?
You may not have to change your home address because of these moments, but you should probably reconsider how many public outings you go to afterwards.
Should Probably Never Shop At That Store Again
"When the cashier said "Have a nice day", and I replied with "No, thanks".
"Background: I wasnt thinking straight that day, and thought they said "Do you want a bag"
That's. How. Twins. Work?
"Her: the twins are 3 years old"
"Me: Both of them?"
"Oh no this unearthed a memory i had buried from kindergarten lmao"
"We had a set of twins in our classroom and once on their birthday party I said "your brother got such a cool party, i hope yours is nice like this too" to one of them and he was like "yeah, this one"
"4 year old me was not a very bright kid"
That's. How. Death. Works...
"Watching the documentary 'The Last Dance' when a Kobe interview pops up -"
"Me: "Wow, they must have filmed this before Kobe died."
"My wife: "Yeah, obviously…."
The cringe comes out of nowhere, and you're not even sure how you were able to ask something so incredibly stupid, but here you are. Lounging in the stupid air.
You Should Have Asked What "Nothing" Tastes Like Next
"In my head I was wondering what one pound of water would look like in terms of volume. What I said out loud however was "How much does a pound of water weigh?"
Keep Up With Me
"A couple of months ago, I got up and drove to work as usual. Later, my girlfriend texted me from home to ask me if she had left her sunglasses in my car. I told her I wasn't sure, but she could grab my spare key and go check."
"In my car."
"Which I had driven to work."
Black Is White, White Is Black
"I don't understand why people place bets on who wins, why not just place bets on who loses?"
"Yeah took me a minute to register what I said..."
And then there's these stories, where the person is probably better off cutting off any human contact henceforth going forward. These are rough to get through, folks.
Should Probably Have A Chat With HR After This
"I was about 4 months into my current job, feeling confident being fresh off the contract-to-hire period, now moved into a coveted full time role. While walking back to my office from the morning kanban I was stopped by my boss, head peeking out of the office:"
"Boss: "Hey TheMediator, do you have a sec?"
"Me: "For you, I've got lots of secs!"
"Boss: wide-eyes, mouth dropped"
"If you're curious why this was incredibly stupid/embarrassing, try saying the phrase "lots of secs" out loud. Preferably, not to your boss though."
You Don't Need College Anymore. Go Home. Bury Your Head In The Sand.
"In my freshman year of college I was dorming next door to a couple cute girls. About a week into the first semester one girl walked from the coed showers to her dorm room in her towel still wet. We were both unlocking our doors to get in our rooms when she looks at me and says…"
"I know I look stunning…(sarcastically)"
"To which I replied, "don't flatter yourself."
"I had to slid a note under her door explaining I was tongue tied as she was beautiful and I meant to say "don't be hard on yourself, you look great." (Or something to that nature). We became good friends."
It's In The Descriptor?
"Chatting to a homeless guy on the street and he told me he was feeling unwell. I told him he should be at home, resting."
"It's been 20 years and the memory of it still brings me out in a cold sweat."
Oh Good Lord...
"Asked my friend how his mom was doing at his moms funeral."
"Jesus Christ this is the worst one on this thread. What was his response?"
"He looked at me and then the casket and kind of smirked. I awkwardly started to try and explain and just said "I'm an idiot. You know I love you. Talk to you in a bit." He makes fun of me now and I can't stop laughing. It's a positive painful memory."
Own up to your mistakes. You'll garner more respect by acknowledging the awkward things you say, however, it's perfectly fine to laugh about it in the moment. That's probably the easiest way to escape the deep, deep shame.