You wash behind your ears for the first time in forever, pickup flowers because you think it's still romantic, and check your teeth one last time for spinach. Phew. You're all good. This date is going to be a huge success as long as the other person isn't wild... Let's hope!
People on Reddit were asked: "Have any of you had dates that turned out better than expected?" These are some of the best answers.
Prior to the date I had no idea she was deaf, I don't know why she didn't mention it. We met online and after talking decided to meet up for dinner. We met at a neutral location and greeted each other, and she agreed to follow me to the restaurant.
Well at this point I am in my truck driving there, sweating and nervous as hell because I have never met a deaf person. Out loud I said "OMG this is going to be a long day!" I wasn't expecting it to go well.
Well immediately upon sitting down our conversation went very well. I have never had someone pay so much attention to me and listen to what I was saying. She maintained eye contact, had lots of questions and was very open about her disability. I learned alot about the whole thing.
I learned alot about myself and about life in general. First impressions are not everything, despite what the old saying goes. People are very interesting and everyone has their own story.
Will we fall in love and get married and live happily ever after? Well maybe not, but I sure made a new friend at the very least. I also learned a lot about human beings and what it means to take the time to get to know someone.
I met my wife when I was just out of college, so I never had much game when it came to the ladies. In fact, I only had one rule: Never take a woman bowling on a date. There's no best-case scenario: Either you're likely to bowl terribly, in which case you look like a dumb-dumb, or you bowl really well, in which case you look like you took her on a date to show off how good at bowling you are, which is so much worse.
That's what happened to me on a second date. I bowled the game of my life (175, which to actual bowlers isn't a big deal, but to bad-side-of-average bowlers is good) and then, as we were picking up our coats to go, my keychain fell out of my pocket — my ironic keychain that I'd bought in a New Haven truck stop that said 'World's Greatest Bowler.' Right then, something clicked, and she made up her mind that there wouldn't be a third date, but luckily at some point she changed her mind and now we're married. But apparently it was real touch-and-go for a minute there.
When I was in high school I invited a guy I had been friends with for a few months to see a movie with me. I've always had really terrible luck with guys (ie: I end up becoming "one of the guys") and at the time I was honestly a little more interested in dating girls. Anyway, we ended up walking to the movie theatre in mid-February weather, just talking. He was incredibly attentive, had a similar sense of humour, and the way he spun words together made me fall in love with the way he spoke before we even got to the theatre. When we got there I almost didn't want to see the movie; I wanted to keep talking to him. We sat far away from other occupied seats in an almost-empty theatre and he spent the whole movie leaning in close to me and whispering stupid little jokes.
We've now been together for a little over a year and a half now. We got through his first (and pretty disastrous) year of university, and now I'm starting in the same school and we're looking at moving in together in May. Pretty sweet.
I went on a date with a guy after a few emails and a lunch date. He showed up and had 18 roses waiting for me on the passenger seat of his car. The date went really well, and it was a nice change of pace because at home, my mom had not been speaking to me for the last week because I was going to move out. Ridiculous me as a 21-year-old with a college degree and a full time job thought it was time to get out into the world...
Anyway, when I get home, my parents are waiting up for me (3 am. I called at midnight to reassure them that I'm safe and will be home later). They then say I can't be trusted with the car they gave me, so I am grounded from using the car. I say ok and go to bed. Wake up the next morning, walk out the door and start heading to a car dealership.
I gave the date from last night a call in case he wasn't busy and might be interested giving me a ride to go get a car. He picked me up, we went shopping.
That was 5 years ago. The car's almost paid off, I've spent almost every night at his side since, and in July we celebrated our first wedding anniversary.
I had broken up with a guy a few months prior who had turned out to be pretty much a sociopath--web of lies, cheated on me the entire year we dated, etc. I was feeling pretty dumb for being taken in by his pretty untrusting of relationships at that moment, and just generally wary of people.
But my friends convinced me to try online dating--I liked being able to kind of "prescreen" the guys, and I wanted to have fun, meet new people, etc.
So, I put up a profile on the dating site attached to The Onion (and also a few other sites), hoping that would lead me to someone with a killer sense of humor. I talked to a few guys and nothing went anywhere, blocked a lot of married guys, and was just about to lose hope when I got a message in my inbox.
The guy looked cute, sent a witty message that sparked my interest, and upon viewing his profile we had a lot in common. I was intrigued enough to write back and that set off a series of messages. The messages led to lengthy phone calls and tons more emails over the holidays.
Then New Year's Day rolled around and he called me, wanting to go out for a drink that night and "start the year off right." Despite being really, really hung over I powered through because I wanted to finally meet this guy.
I didn't expect more than a fun night, just a chance to meet someone new and nice, break out of my shell a little. I certainly didn't have commitment or marriage on my mind. But when we finally stood face to face, it was like a cliche romantic comedy. We only had eyes for each other. I was thrown for a loop by how instantly head-over-heels I was for him...I had the bizarre thought over that first drink that he was The One. We had an amazing first date (lasting a long time after a single drink) and I floated home, already hoping to see him again soon. Little did I know he told his buddies the next day that he met the girl he was going to marry.
That date led to a second, a kiss, and a third, fourth, and fifth. On that date, he said, "I don't want to see anyone else and I hope you don't, either, because I really like you. Want to be my girlfriend?" Three years later, I married him. We have been together almost nine years since that first date.
You never know who will turn out to be your forever.
I remember one date where she actually showed up, didn't stand me up like the others. It was a refreshing change of pace. She was really nice and sweet.
The first time I met him, I was throwing up into a toilet at a fraternity party. He took care of me and walked me back to my dorm that night, handing me off to my roommates. He asked them for my number.
The first time we hung out together, we were making out in a public dorm lounge. On one of our first real dates, he asked me to his fraternity formal. Naturally, I said yes. But he forgot that he also asked a girl he was seeing before he met me. She thought she was still going, so that was…awkward.
About three months into our relationship, he ended up getting extremely sick. He had to drop out of school, and he basically lived out of a hospital for an entire semester. I was there every day and mostly every night with him.
This became a recurring theme in our relationship. Every year, there were new challenges and even more difficult struggles. But all of these things just brought us closer together.
Last month, we got married in Maui in front of all our closest friends and family.
Had met a dude through mutual friends a few times; he was a friendly acquaintance. Due to one of our buds playing Cupid and dropping hints back and forth, we got the idea to go on an informal sort of double date: him, me, our Cupid and her boyfriend, to the dusk-till-dawn night at the drive in. (Basically people get wasted and watch movies all night). I hated watching movies at the time, but I agreed to go out of interest in this guy.
Another mutual friend was having a party that night as well. After a few "heh stoked for the movie" texts back and forth the whole plan dissolved and we ended up just going to the party. When I got there, a ton of drunk people came up and all asked a variation of "Why were you going to go to the drive in? You hate movies!" making it very obvious that I was only going for the date of it. It became officially a date at that point, which was a little awkward in the good way.
Had a great night, smoked many blunts, ended up sitting awkwardly in the same chair edging closer and closer alllll night until we spontaneously started kissing for the next hour or so. Obnoxious, I know.
All in all, it was the best date I ever had. It didn't feel fake or uncomfortable like every other dinner-and-a-movie date I'd been on. I was comfortable and happy. We made out all night and slept on a futon in a freezing cold room. I woke up happy and...I dunno. Warm. Contented. He kissed me on the cheek in front of everyone at breakfast and I blushed.
16 months later I'm still blushing :)
On my first date, I had explosive diarrhea a one-person bathroom that was audible to a large group of people. When I stepped out, my date (and everyone else) was staring at me with wide eyes. He said we had to go somewhere else because this establishment was closing.
The part where it turned out better than expected: He asked me on a second date.
I went on a first date with a guy who took me out to a decent restaurant in our tiny hometown. After we ordered dinner, this dude seriously pulled out a cigarette and a lighter and started smoking at the table. This was in like 2006 so it was a little different then, but it's not like it was 1965. People didn't do that. It was not OK. He was the only one smoking in the restaurant.
I finally had to tell him to put the cigarette out. After that start, it's more than a little surprising that we went on to date for six years and have now been married for four. So, hey, you never know.
When I was in college, one of my best guy friends asked me out completely out of the blue — I'd just gone through a breakup, but I didn't want to hurt his feelings, so I figured I'd give it a shot. Unfortunately, I found out that he was making a super-big deal out of the date: taking me to a stupidly nice restaurant, obsessing over every detail, etc. Yikes. The day of our date, I woke up feeling sick, but I decided I'd suck it up and go.
It was a total disaster. He ordered for me and mispronounced every single thing on the menu (and the waiter let him know it), he spilled soup on his shirt, and when the food came, I suddenly felt so sick that I couldn't eat a thing. It was painfully awkward and neither of us knew what to say for the full meal. On the ride home, he apologized for taking me on the worst date ever, and he was so cute about it, I said I'd plan the next one (which went much, much better).
We dated for the next two years.
I had met this girl through a friend of a friend, and started texting/Myspace messaging... the good ol' 2008 flirt combo. Anyways, we decided to meet up one night, and I had recently been on a series of bad dates. I was 18 at the time, so I really wasn't expecting much. Her entire group of friends was really weird, and almost off-putting, but I decided to meet up because my best friend said her and I would be a good match.
It was her idea to meet at this coffee shop downtown. I get there first, wait for a bit, and then meet her. The coffee shop is closed. We decide to go to a hamburger/hot dog joint nearby, and even THAT is closed. I'm beginning to think that this is going to be a giant pile of crap for another date, so I just say "Screw it. Let's go to the Olive Garden."
[BTW, side note, gentlemen: want to impress a girl on a 1st date? Go to the Olive Garden. It works.]
We get there, and we have an awesome dinner. After that, we go for a walk, and end up talking until about 2am. I had to go then, as I had work at 5am, but we ended up meeting the next night for another awesome date. Almost four years later, we're still dating and live together!
When I was in high school, I didn't date. At all. I wanted to finish with fantastic grades so I could get out of the small town I lived in at the time.
So, I'm at the mall and I'm buying the latest Modest Mouse album (Good News, so it was '04), and this random guy asks me on a date. He wasn't from the small town I lived in, so I agreed.
He picked me up from my house, and we drove to a big(ger) city about 45 minutes away. The first thing we did was go to Sonic. I was a bit put off, as Sonic wasn't what I was expecting for first date dining. He then tells me he has a surprise.
With food in hand, we pull over and he beckons me to walk with him. He pulls out a set of keys from his pockets, gives me a smile, and walks up to a billboard ladder. Apparently, his dad owned some billboards in town.
We ate our Sonic sitting way above the traffic of this city, and 16-year-old me was very, very surprised.
I went on a blind date with a kind of stupid girl. She was pretty cute though. My friend dragged me along because his girlfriend's friend was gonna be lonely. So we went to go see Titanic in 3-D. We talked about how boring that movie was so we went and saw some other movie. We hit it off that night and we both had fun.
A second date ended up with me being invited back to her apartment...which is usually a surefire predictor for smooching — but then, out of nowhere, she asked, 'Would you like to hold my snake?'
It wasn't a euphemism — she meant it for real. She had taken her pet snake out of its tank and was offering it to me. And for the record...I HATE SNAKES.
I also knew this was some sort of test. Like, I had to prove my manhood by braving her snake. Otherwise, it'd be an early night.
I weighed my love for smooching against my absolute fear of snakes, and said, 'I'm good, thanks.'
We ended up smooching anyway.
In college there was this girl I liked, but we had been just friends for a while. One night she casually commented that there was this concert she wanted to go to about 90 minutes away, but she couldn't find anyone to go with. Normally I'm pretty dense, but I picked up on this hint and said I'd love to go. When we got there we decided we'd leave our coats in the car because it was going to be warm inside and we didn't want to drag our coats around all night. Seemed like a brilliant idea, only one problem. She threw her keys in her coat pocket before shutting the door.
This was pre smart phone days, so we tried a pay phone and phonebooks to get a locksmith, but couldn't find one that was open. Eventually she called her dad, who said he'd bring a spare key after the show. We tried to hang out in the lobby as long as we could because it was late October and cold out, but eventually they kicked us out so they could close up. The night could have been a disaster but I ended up having a blast just sitting close to each other to try to keep warm and having good conversation under the stars for about an hour.
In college, my roommate had a great guy friend who was attending a school out of state. He would sometimes call our dorm room (pre-cell phone days) and I'd take his messages for my roomie when she wasn't there. We started talking a little here and there, no biggie. After awhile, he started sending these awesome letters to me with funny cartoons in them, or letters about himself, or drawings he'd done.
Around the end of the school year, he came down to visit my roommate. We finally met face-to-face, and the chemistry was wild. I felt really bad for my roommate, because it was like the instant we met we could not be apart. I truly had no feelings for him before he arrived, and expected it to be a "Hey, nice to meet ya" kind of thing. That night we went out and it was amazing. He was awesome, funny, so sweet, truly a great guy. We fell hard for each other, and ended the night with a steam-up-the-car-windows make out session.
My roommate was really cool about the whole thing, which was awesome. He and I dated for a while.
Went out a few weeks ago with a guy I thought was a pick-up artist, and I had my guard up and was expecting to find him to be a douchebag. Turns out he was really charming, sweet, and I had a great deal of fun with him. I think he's a really genuinely nice person, and I enjoy him a lot. It's rarely awesome to be proven wrong, but this was one such case.
I was on a second date with this great guy, and everything was going perfectly. Right as we were finishing dinner, his friend called him in desperate need of a ride. Apparently, this dude was just dumped by his girlfriend, who drove off with his wallet and his keys, so he had no way of getting anywhere, and my date (being a good friend) asked if I would mind going on a rescue mission.
An hour later, when we arrived at the address the friend gave us, we realized it was a strip club in a very shady part of town (which means, this guy's girlfriend dumped him at a strip club...hmm...). After picking up this very loud and very drunk third wheel, he started tearing up and told us he couldn't be alone that night, so we begrudgingly said we'd hang out with him for just a bit.
When we got into the house he was staying at, this 'friend' decided to launch his phone as hard as possible at my date's face and broke his front tooth right off. My poor date now had almost zero front tooth, and his friend proceeded to cry again. Shocker, we haven't seen this guy since. But it turns out that missing-tooth look really worked for me, because we've been married for almost 10 years now.
Went on a date with a girl that was way out of my league. It was meant to be a group thing on $2 Tuesdays at the local movie theater. Little by little everyone in the group backed out due to school stuff and the only three left going were the girl and her roommate. The girl was in night class when I called her roommate. That's when she informed me that the girl had a longtime boyfriend. I backed out and gave up.
20 minutes later my phone rings and it's the girl. She wants to go to the movie even though we are the only two going. I gulp HARD and try to act cool as I agree that it would be a good idea. The movie was a borefest (she's all that) so we cut out early and spent HOURS driving around talking and end up sharing a plate of chocolate chip pancakes from IHOP at 4 in the morning.
Neither of us mentioned her boyfriend, as we shared a first kiss. The next day I tell her that I can't continue to see her as long as she has a boyfriend. She breaks down and explains that she felt trapped in this relationship (4 years) with her first boyfriend. He was REALLY verbally abusive and cruel. She was way out of his league too, so I figured this was his way of trying to keep control of her. A day later she broke up with him. 14 years later we are still together, married 9, and have two amazing kids (that got her looks, thank god).
I had a "setup" blind date... double date. I thought nothing of it until I saw this woman. She was amazing and well, far out of my league. No problem, I have beer, and a corner. Told my friend he's a jerk.
For some reason, I had the luck of her actually being attracted to me. Also, my friend's wife wanted to see me suffer (thus why the set up with this bombshell) and expected me to fail and enjoy the situation in the days coming. Turns out since she liked me went on full warfare to get this girl NOT to like me. I was pretty heartbroken after that, I assumed my friends wife would doom the prospect of a relationship.
I still don't have a CLUE what I did to impress her.. but I thank whatever made me since it seemed to work. Whatever it was. Seriously, I have no idea, and it's kind of sad to think about the potential mate she could of had compared to me.
On top of this sick game my friends wife was playing, it was an hour's drive to see her, not long in some respects I understand but still, enough to destroy an already stressed situation. Oh, and I worked at night. I would think I spend all my luck during those days... but to make a long story short I eventually had to balls to ask her PARENTS, if I could marry her.... took her to the beach right after and asked. We had kids soon after, and dear lord they are handfuls.
I could go on but she's amazing and so much more, a far better person then I am, thinks of everyone else first, CONSTANTLY makes me better just from being beside her, and man did I need that. I did nothing but make poor choices and cause trouble most of my life, while she stayed away from drugs, polished school off while working and she's basically a saint.
My junior year of high school a guy asked me to go on a last minute date with him while I was at a family member's 50th birthday party. My parents agreed to let me go (and I was happy to leave the party of old people early) so my dad drove me to a gas station to meet him. We were in his car being awkward and what not, until we got to the movies. I can't remember what movie we saw but it ended pretty late. Not having to be home at a specific time we decided to go to a star party where we stargazed and looked at the moon though a telescope (he was very knowledgeable about stars and space). It was cold out so he made sure I was warm and gave me his jacket.
We left the party at about 11 or 12 and went back to his house. Neither of us wanted the date to end. So we went back to his house and "watched a movie". It was the first time I ever really made out with a guy. I ended up leaving around 3AM. I had no clue what to expect when he asked me out that day, but it turned out to be one of the best/most romantic dates of my life.
In college, I had told a guy friend I was not open to dating anyone - I was about to leave the country for a year. One day he asks me if I want to go to a movie with a group of his friends. When I show up, he's already bought tickets for both of us and refuses my offer to pay him back. I realize, oh crap, this is a date.
I spend the entire movie hunched over in my seat, dreading the moment he is going to try to put his arm around me or something. He never does. Afterwards we chat and get something to eat and it's all really casual and not weird, but he's made it pretty clear he's interested in me without making me feel pressured. He totally respected my boundaries and was polite as heck, the absolute polar opposite of creepy and possessive.
Long story short, we've been married 6 years.
I had a blind date tonight, set up by a friend of a friend that I met Saturday. She was having a barbeque and I was the only single person there. After chatting with one of her friends, he said he knew someone that I would get along with really well. Hesitant, I gave him my number and he passed it along.
The guy called me last night, we chatted a bit, and set up a date for tonight. He was running late so I sat at the bar, had a shot, and waited. He found me at the bar, being the only person actually sitting at it and I was pleasantly surprised that he was attractive.
We chatted for a good few hours about all the things you probably aren't supposed to talk about on a first date and had a wonderful time. When leaving, my total dorkiness came through when I said I wasn't sure how to end these things. I ended up giving him a goodnight kiss. Shortly after we both arrived at our respective homes, he messaged me asking me for a date Saturday.
It's been quite awhile since I've been on a date and even longer since I've had one that just seemed so effortless. Even if it doesn't work out, I have a renewed sense of hope in dating.
Some of this material has been edited for clarity.
Many of us think we have life all figured out.
Curious to hear what stumps strangers online, Redditor homo1ogize asked:
"What makes absolutely no sense to you at all?"
The things people do can be forever mysteries.
"Grown adults not taking responsibility for their actions/property and expecting others to clean up after them."
A Curious Culinary Process
"How people came up with baking."
"I get eating meats and veggies and fruits. That's just food that's pretty much ready to go."
"But somehow someone figured you can grind this plant into a powder, add a certain amount of water and some chicken eggs and some oil and some other crushed plant stuff and then heat it for X Minutes and now you have cake or bread or cookies or whatever."
Leaving The Bowl Full
"People that don't flush public restroom toilets."
"What's the deal with that? Do they not flush in their own homes? Is it laziness? Contempt with society? Seeing retail and other workers suffer? Just not knowing better?"
Life Insurance Loophole
"Seems like half of the true-crime shows I watch involve life insurance. What I don't understand is how the perpetrators convince themselves that being the beneficiary on a brand-new life insurance policy and then having the insured turn up dead within days or weeks is not going to put you under a detective's microscope."
"Even more suspicious are the ones who immediately make the claim for payout within a day of the death. At least sit on it for a month or two and act like you're grieving."
These trends continue to dumbfound Redditors' minds.
The Housing Market
"House price rises. How seriously can people have so much money for crappy houses? Where are all these great paying jobs that service the mortgage?"
"My partner and I have decent middle class jobs ( teacher, nurse) yet cannot afford to buy in the city where we live…. And not even close to the city where we live."
"How can a pandemic wreck an economy… throw thousands out of work needing to rely on government handouts …. Yet house prices increase?"
The Facebook Ploy
"Those Facebook photos that promise you a lot of money if you post them. Is it true that people believe it?"
"How, in what environment, under what conditions, could that possibly work? Is this some sort of inside joke that I'm not aware of? 'Write Amen.'"
"My first language was Spanish, which I learned at home. I learnt English at school and with friends outside of school. In addition, German is spoken."
"Surprisingly, when I speak in my brain, it's always in English. When I pronounce them out loud, though, they come out in the correct language."
Knowing scientific explanations doesn't necessarily mean we will completely comprehend them.
"How the moon is in perfect rotation with the earth to the point where we only see one side of the moon at all times no matter what."
Lack Of A Void
"What is the root of consciousness and why is there something instead of nothing."
"How babies just go from swimming/breathing in a pouch of goo to being born and able to breathe normal air. It makes no sense to me. How does something go from not breathing air to breathing air in like a second?"
The Vastness Above Us
"Look at the moon. Some days you can see Saturn or Jupiter out there. Look at the stars."
"You think about us… people on this rock in space all running around. We're floating in space on a rock. Spinning around. All together. One."
"And space is just soooo big. It's overwhelming. Really really big. I can't even comprehend how big."
"It doesn't even make sense how big it is."
This is something I've always chalked up to fate, but the concept of meeting people floors me.
How did I wind up with the friends in my circle? How did I get paired with my parents in this life? And how did I meet the person with whom I wound up exchanging vows?
It's terrifying to comprehend the prospect of never having met some of the most important people in my life, yet I would never know because I haven't been faced with the alternative.
It continues to blow my mind.
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It shouldn't be hard to try and stay healthy.
However, it feels like the world is against you, as most stuff marketed or sold as "healthy" could actually be hurting you.
What do people think is healthy but is actually harmful?
Seeing something on the shelves marked as "healthy" shouldn't cause you to second guess yourself. It should be easy, right? However, these products might be holding a darker secret than you realize.
For Those In The Back: Its Not The Fat, It's The Sugar
"Low fat or non fat foods tend to add more sugar than their regular fat counterparts to make up for the lost flavor."
"Edit: To clarify, for example I'm talking about something like reduced fat cheese its vs the regular cheese its. The reduced fat may seem "healthier" but it's really not."
Just Eat The Fruit
"People focus on the fact that it contains some nutrients, but not that it also contains as much sugar as Coca-Cola"
"This. The only truly healthful way to consume a fruit's juice is to eat the whole fruit. Peeling and eating an orange takes so much longer than chugging way too much juice. Plus the benefit of the fiber. Plus the benefit of fresh and natural vitamin C."
This One's A Real Bummer
"Those acai bowls are loaded with sugar."
"Ohhhh damn. I see why I've been rapidly gaining weight recently . Those damn delicious açaí bowl."
You might be doing something every day that's causing health deficiencies in your day to day living. The worst part of it all is the notion that this unhealthy thing you're doing is supposed to be "fun" or "relaxing."
From The Earth? Yes. Still Smoke? Also Yes.
"Smoking marijuana. And I say this as a daily toker. Inhaling smoke into your body is ALWAYS bad for you. It's just better than inhaling poison (cigarettes) into your body."
"This bothers so much. I smoked almost daily for 8 years, not as much now, but so many stoners refuse to acknowledge that inhaling ANY kind of smoke is bad for you. Yeah, cannabis has a lot of benefits. But putting any kind of mind-altering substance into your body it is not risk-free."
"Same with vaping. Just because it's a healthier alternative to cigarettes doesn't make it automatically healthy itself. It's just a good way to help those with smoking problems ween off it and be healthier. It's not meant to be used as a way to start an addiction. Addiction still kills."
Find That Right Balance
"Not so much anymore because there is much more awareness, but being out in the sun. My mom would force me to sunbathe when I was a child because it was "unhealthy" to be pale and that people would think I am gross. Now she's not even fifty and her face is pocked with scars from surgeries treating melanoma, and every year has to go back in to the doctor for more skin removal and to determine if she needs further, more intensive treatment."
"I have never sunbathed as an adult and religiously put on sunscreen, wear long sleeves and an "old man" hiking hat when I go just about anywhere outside. Please, everyone, protect your skin!"
"But also on the flip side, it's really common to have a vitamin D deficiency if your skin never sees the sunlight, so make sure you're taking a supplement if that's the case. Vitamin D deficiency can lead to a whole host of its own issues. It feels like every health issue is some variation of a double sided coin."
The Truth Hits Like A Truck
"Being with someone because you don't want to be alone"
"Yes, but like many of the harmful things in this thread, it sure can be fun for a little while. Until the consequences start coming at you."
What can feel a little shocking about some of these things listed is the thought that you're doing something good for you. You're working out! What's the worst that can happen?
Sometimes Crushing It Every Day Can Crush You Every Day
"working out with 100% effort everyday"
"Agree. You can train different muscles, but in the end, you are still using the same nervous system. Also, Rhabdomyolysis is a thing, so….."
"In case anyone else feels the need to look it up:"
"Rhabdomyolysis is a potentially life-threatening syndrome resulting from the breakdown of skeletal muscle fibers with leakage of muscle contents into the circulation. The most common causes are crush injury, overexertion, alcohol abuse and certain medicines and toxic substances."
It's Goop. How Can You Not Trust It?
"Anything Gwyneth Paltrow is marketing."
"Hold on, you mean to tell me that shoving a jade egg up your vagina, isn't good for you?"
"The jade egg is probably the least unhealthy thing she sells, as it does absolutely nothing."
Not Doing What You Think
All of those "Detox" drinks, and gimmicks.
Take care of yourself. Don't fall for health fads. Start simple.
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Our past is chock full of "life lessons" that are actually just crap. It's easy to spoon-feed children drivel. They're sponges ready to absorb.
Then those children become adults that require rewiring.
Between culture changes and generations of upheaval, there is a lot that we are left to examine when out in the world. Look at where we are as a society right now. We are stuck in the throes of a culture war stemming from generational misinformation.
So where do we begin?
Redditor Baby_Bella_XX wanted to discuss the information we thought we understood as kids that might require an update. They asked:
What have you had to unlearn from your childhood?
The biggest lesson for me. "Oh stop worrying. There is plenty of time for that."
NO THERE IS NOT! There is no time left! Use it wisely!
Talk it Through
"Not talking about problems or concerns or feelings. My family really only makes small talk. Talking about the weather, gossip, etc. If there is any kind of disagreement, it's typically handled by giving the silent treatment, which might last anywhere from a couple hours to a few weeks or more. The only exception to this was my dad."
"If he was really angry, he would yell, slam things, and sometimes hit. Then pretend it never happened. No one ever asked how anyone else was doing, or about their day. I would come home from school and go straight to my room, because it was just a fact of life that no one would want to talk to me."
"If I had a problem, it would never occur to me to discuss it with my parents. There were never any "I love you's" or hugs or anything. I still, to this day, have never heard either of my parents apologize. I know they loved us in their own dysfunctional way, though."
"I probably overcompensate now. If I have a disagreement with my husband, I HAVE to talk it through in it's entirety. Even if it takes hours. I hug and tell my kids I love them several times a day. I ask questions every day about school, friends, etc. I apologize when I'm wrong. It's weird that that honestly comes naturally to me. I never realized how messed up my childhood was until I had kids of my own." ~ nicole11930
"Learning to say NO." ~ guyhabit
"If only my family would learn to accept "no". My mom insists on buying metric crap ton of food everytime she visits, despite me telling her not to, so she goes through all my things to "know" what to buy."
"She saw some oatmeal I never finished and two cans of soup I had for emergencies when I'm too sick to eat anything else. Now I'm stuck with a metric crap ton of soup and oatmeal that I keep forgetting to drop off for the local food pantry." ~ 1stLtObvious
"Talking back to anyone older that you is disrespectful. My parents taught me this and it's crap." ~ Halloweendog84
"I unlearned it during childhood. Got tired of my grandparents treating my parents wrong. Still am. I just wish my parents would see it and realize that they don't need to rely on them anymore. I'm tired of abusive or unhelpful family members being part of our lives." ~ bluedragggon3
XOXOSeason 4 Hug GIF by Good GirlsGiphy
"That I'm not actually a burden just for being here." ~ KNOCKknockLAHEY_420
I feel like everyone here needs a hug. All of you should know, you deserve to be here. Every life can change another. Remember that...
TearsTobey Maguire Reaction GIFGiphy
"It's okay to cry and it does not make you a weakling. When sad times hit, you have every right to cry your heart out to heal your wounds." ~ unforgivablenope
"Other children weren't psychic, I'm autistic." ~ Thinkingwithportals1
"As a child, I missed a lot of social cues, I couldn't read facial expressions or body language (or even know that you're meant to do that). The other kids kept seeming to know what others were feeling or thinking, so the logical conclusion was that everybody except me was psychic." ~ Thinkingwithportals1
Take my word for it...
"Lots of things. I actually can make it in the real world. I am not doomed to failure because of who I am and the quirks that come with being me. I am not the multitude of nasty labels my father spewed at me. The whole world isn't filled with terrible people who want to take advantage of me, requiring me to always be strong if I don't want to get taken advantage of."
"I am not actually sensitive and over-dramatic. I was actually picked at, 24/7, and so that was why it was so easy to rile me up; I never had a chance not to be emotionally charged. I actually can cook. I am not, as my mother often hinted, naturally a bad cook. I could write pages and pages of this crap and I still wouldn't cover it all. Take my word for it, I've unlearned a lot." ~ EgyptianDevil78
"My parents told me to eats what's on my plate, now I'm fat, coz I don't eat til I'm full, I eat til it's gone." ~ racerboy661
"If I end up wanting more after eating it all, I can go back and get another small portion. So my advice is cut down on portion size and eat until you feel full then stop. It is way healthier. Try for no waste but that's the idea behind small portions." ~ PoopLoofah
The Best Of...High School College GIFGiphy
"That just because I am not scoring at the top or going to the most prestigious college I am not not smart." ~ Imteyimg
Here is a lesson. Just try to be a good person. Sadly, in this day and age, that seems harder to do. And remember... our parents don't know everything.
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It's important to keep your mind healthy as you age, learning new things and trying new activities out.
What is an underrated skill that people should learn?
Start with the basics, learning things you'll definitely be using in your day-to-day life.
Just Get It All Done
"General fixing things around the house like hanging up frames or repairing basic things like holes in the drywall, painting etc, basic electrical work like light switches."
"Cooking and cleaning"
"Of course with learning basic electrical work, definitely learn about electrical safety. Safe practices are critical, as mistakes can be fatal."
"Source: am an electrical engineer and also work on home electrical."
Learn Something New Every Time
"Before I learned to cook I was an incredibly picky eater. Cooking helps you get more comfortable with ingredients. The best part is it gives you full control over your flavours. You aren't stuck picking from a menu. You are only limited by your creativity, skill and accessibility to ingredients when you cook for yourself."
"It can be as complicated as cooking a beef Wellington, or jazzing up some packaged ramen noodles. The best part is you learn something new every time you cook."
All The Fast and the Furious Folks Look So Cool When They Do It
"Driving a manual. No one will steal your car if it's a manual, because 98% of people don't know how to drive stick."
"Note: this might only apply in the US."
Some of these activities are life-saving, in that they could save your life in the heat of a moment. While it might feel silly to practice something like knot tying right now, these people make a good argument for mastering such a vital skill.
Learn A Few. You Don't Have To Learn All Of Them.
"Knot tying and sewing"
"+1 on knot tying especially. I never did Boy Scouts or anything like that, but I had an odd job in my 20s where I had to learn proper mooring technique: figure 8, sailor's knot etc."
"I wouldn't say it changed my life or anything. But I've never failed to secure anything since, and even just the practice of keeping consistent tautness while tying shoelaces has saved me time on many a run/soccer match etc."
You Never Know When You'll Need It
"I finally learned how to swim this year at 26. It felt amazing just jumping in the deep end being able to swim comfortably."
Learning A Few Phrases In Any Language Can Help You
"I totally agree. I learned some sign language as a kid after taking classes one summer and I'm glad I did."
"I remember a few years ago when I was in a foreign country a young woman was with her little brother and panhandling (people were treating them like garbage) and I had some change and gave it to them. She started signing "thank you" and signed that I was pretty (which was sweet of her). She was shocked when I signed back to her a simple "you're welcome" and it seemed to make her day."
And then there's these, skills which, on the surface, may not feel like they matter a whole lot. To get by in this day and age, however, they may be the most critical skills of all.
Go A Step Further
"How to separate fact from fiction - fake from true - especially with regard to news."
"The number of people who don't know the difference between a journalist and a pundit is a lot. It's not necessarily "news" just because you get it from a purported news channel."
Learn To Recognize Them, Not How To Name Them
"Logical fallacies. It would help with knowing when someone's misleading you in an argument and will also help you communicate your thoughts more clearly"
"Just don't literally name-drop the logical fallacy during the argument. Not particularly persuasive. Guaranteed to roll some eyes. Explain it in plain English instead. Use an example to show how it's a problem."
"Accounting. If you want to run a successful business, you really should do an accounting course. Not so that you can do your own accounting. But so that you can understand what others are telling you."
"Agreed. My granddad always said "watch the pennies and the dollars will watch themselves". Understanding accounting is a must for anyone in business."
Get out there and try something new. You never know when the thing you learn will come in handy. After all, better to know something and not need it than needing something and not know how to swim.
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