1. Once I went to go check on an elderly woman in a nursing home and I walked in on poop completely smeared on every wall in the bathroom and all on the floor. She was sitting there smiling. Welcome to nursing!
2. I was taking care of a patient with late stage parkinsons disease who was bedridden. He suffered from really bad contractures which means his arms were rigidly immobilized and he barely had use of his legs. The facility had him in a brief (aka an adult diaper) and my fellow student and I were in charge of changing him after he pooped all over himself that morning. There was feces everywhere, and it seemed to take forever to get him completely cleaned up. Just as we thought we were finished, the man stopped us. He asked if we would put lotion on his testicles and pull down his foreskin over his penis before we finished. The other student and I looked at each other in panic, but we had no choice than to do what he said because he obviously couldnt do it himself. Thanks to nursing school, I can now say I have lotioned up an elderly mans balls and wrestled his foreskin into submission all in the name of learning.
3. The bullying and the way student nurses are completely ignored. My first ever placement my mentor didnt even talk to me for the first 2 weeks. Many days didnt even stop for a break during shifts. Nursing in the UK is in a really bad place, we need to protect our student nurses and stamp out the bullying. Not many students are making it to graduation between money and conditions. We should all be very worried for what the future holds for nursing care in the NHS.
4. Hello I am a third year nursing student!
Well for starters, every day is crazy. But this one time I was caring for an elderly patient who did not have much control of her bowels.
With a little help from another nurse, we lifted this patient up in an overhead sling to provide some cleaning to her bottom. This is normally a time when patients do have a bowel movement due to the more upright position that they are in. Just as we are about to lower the lift I hear a rippling sound come out of her backside and quickly step out of the way just in time to (Continued)
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dodge the missile of [poop] that came shooting out of her rectum. Of course, I kept composed and did not laugh or make any rude gestures towards her but I was dying on the inside, like literally dying.
5. On my first day on my first placement as a student nurse, I was looking after a dementia patient, and no one told me he had a fake eye. I was horrified when he pulled his eye out of its socket and rolled it down the corridor. I went running after it to give it back to him he washed it in his orange juice and put it back in his socket while I stood there in surprise. Later that week, the same man threw a bowl of soup at me. It was still hot. My reflexs got a lot better after that.
6. A confused elderly lady once cupped my balls, kissed me on the cheek, and giggled like a school girl while I checked her back and bottom for pressure sores. I couldnt face what might happen if I did an ECG so had to beg another student to do it.
7. Had a cellphone shoved up my bum hole while i was changing his plasters from surgery. i was the one who needed surgery after that.
8. I answered a call bell pressed by a patient I had assisted onto a commode thinking he was finished, instead he said he needed some help and asked me to massage his poo out for him.
9. I once had a patient who was a 10/10 for pain. When I asked if there was anything else I could get for him, he said you could slap me on my ass and get me going! 10/10 pain my ass.
10. One day when I was on my endoscopy rotation we had a patient who had radiation proctitis as a result of prostate cancer treatment and required a procedure about once a year to alleviate the symptoms. (Continued)
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Anyway, he has the procedure and is wheeled back to post op. He tells me he needs to poop. I reassure him, and tell him its just the air they pumped into his colon for the procedure. (Id been in the room with him for the procedure and his colon was definitely empty!). I hooked him up to a monitor and head off to check on someone else. About 15 min later the buzzer in the toilet goes off. As I head down the corridor, I notice that this guys bed is empty. Opening the door to the toilet, Im greeted with bloody fluid all over the floor, up the walls, and into the centre cubicle where my patient is sitting on the toilet looking a bit sheepish. Sorry Nurse, I seem to have made a bit of a mess!
It took us half an hour to clean up. He was ok too, nothing major had happened - he went back for a rescope and was kept in overnight for observation.
11. We were learning how to do dressing changes at a local nursing home. Mr. Smith had a non-healing skin lesion on his chest that turned out to be skin cancer. It ended getting so bad that his chest wall, skin, muscle tissue, and sternum eroded away. Essentially he would sit in the corner of his room and you could see the pulsation of his heart through the big, pink hole in his chest. Our brilliant nursing instructor tried to teach us how to change a dressing, but forgot to dilute the cleaning solution before switching out for the new gauze. She essentially soaked gauze in undiluted bleach and stuffed it onto his heart. He lived. She got fired.
12. Just a little background, if placement where I am isnt NHS they can be a bit funny about leaving you on your own because they dont think our trainings good enough, so we usually dont get left alone, particularly with patients with challenging behaviour.
I was sat with a patient having lunch surrounded by staff and other patients, this particular patient wasnt very happy with their options, cup and plate went flying, staff scattered, no one presses the alarm and I get punched and scratched in the neck while the patient grabs my top. Im left being held by the top, looking like Ive wet myself covered in their drink and trying to find a member of staff to help me out. No one turned up and Im still being held so I decided to strap in and deal with the situation myself, by the time a member of staff shows up to help; the patients calm, Ive been released, were chatting, my legs are feeling very cold and I get told off for being alone with a patient.
13. My patient rang his bell saying he needed the toilet. As soon as he stood up (Continued)
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the floodgates, front and back opened. Luckily I had a pad on me, what I didnt know as a student was that pads werent designed to capture free flowing liquid straight away. At this point I was on my knees panicking and praying it wouldnt get on my face because it kept going and going and going. Lets just say my late shift couldnt have ended any worse.
14. Whilst doing the morning wash round, an elderly gentleman asked me for a wash bowl and a razor. I thought this was pretty weird as he didnt have any facial hair but gave him it anyway. A few minutes later i popped my head in to ask if everything was okay and to my horror he had one knee up to his shoulder and was shaving his balls. He just carried on and started a conversation like it was nothing.
15. I trained as a midwife so slightly different, but I was once performing a vaginal examination on a client at the exact moment her membranes ruptured (waters broke).
It was like a log flume, my clothes were soaked through- right down to my underwear! I had to change into some highly attractive paper pants we give to women postnatally?
16. Used to be a student aide in a nurses office in a middle school. One of my kids hands me a bag with his clothes in it and asks me to carry it around for him while I was chaperoning him for the day (he had seizures). Well, I started smelling crap. It was not from the common core crap they have now I asked him did you have an accident in your pants bud? He said no, in the clothes you have in the bag I did though. I about died. Ill never hold a bag for another kid again lol.
17. I was looking after a child who had been putting push pins into a nerf gun and using it to pop balloons. I guess one of the pins got stuck so he turned it round to look down the barrel and Yeah. Pin in the eye.
18. I was on ward round on a urology Ward. They doctor told me prior to going into a patients room that the patient actually had a (Continued)
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hydrocele (sack of fluid that firms around the testicular area). I had no idea what this was but nodded along politely and when into the room. The patient whips his pants down without a being prompted and revealed that I can only describe as a space hopper between his legs. I was in stunned silence and dont know where to look. Reminded me of Randy Marsh in that South Park episode!
19. There was a physio on the ward and doing exercises with a patient; specifically squats and this lady just took a massive dump in the middle of the ward. All the other patients got up and left the ward space.
20. As a student you are expected to do a community placement, I was with the district nurses (nurse who come to your house if you are unable to reach your gp surgery) from November to Febuary.
In the 2 weeks before christmas the whole nursing team bought the same christmas jumper and worse tinsel in their hair. My mentor and myself adore christmas and strung fairy lights in the car as it was our office and the regular patients we saw we couldnt resist the temptation to sing christmas carols as we knocked on their door before going in to treat them. We got so many mince pies and chocolates in those few weeks! Yum yum!
21. I was once placing a urinary catheter in a male patient with dementia. Halfway through the procedure, he raised his hand, put a hand on each boob and left them there. I asked him to let go but he wasnt complying. I could do nothing about it as I was gloved up at the time with lubricant all over my gloves, and there were no other nurses within calling distance. So I spent the next ten minutes finishing off the procedure, with his hands on my boobs.
22. When I was a student nurse I worked on a long stay ward for people with learning disabilities who had mental health problems. One afternoon I was charged with dishing up dinner. Every other day there had been gravy to go with the food but on this particular day there wasnt, instead there was a (Continued)
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creamy sauce. There was no dessert either
I dished up and poured the sauce on the food. Half way through, one lady said I dont like semolina Turned out, Id put the semolina dessert all over the cauliflower bake!! Oooops.
23. My strangest delivery (I was a student midwife) was dealing with a concealed pregnancy where no one in the family knew the girl was pregnant. The girl had gone to A&E with her mum after telling her that she had twisted/broken her ankle but she was actually in labour. The whole time in the delivery room, the girl was in denial and her mother was crying. It was by far the strangest and most awkward experience of my life.
We've all said something stupid, let's not lie to ourselves.
It's okay to say something stupid. It showcases the real person on the inside, that we're all flawed, imperfect, and made of cooky combinations of words that don't necessarily line up to make sense. Sometimes we're nervous in a situation, other times we're just hitting 'Quick Reply' in our brains and what comes out doens't work, but whatever the reason, you for sure are going to remember it, late at night, for the rest of your life.
What is the stupidest thing that ever came out of your mouth?
You may not have to change your home address because of these moments, but you should probably reconsider how many public outings you go to afterwards.
Should Probably Never Shop At That Store Again
"When the cashier said "Have a nice day", and I replied with "No, thanks".
"Background: I wasnt thinking straight that day, and thought they said "Do you want a bag"
That's. How. Twins. Work?
"Her: the twins are 3 years old"
"Me: Both of them?"
"Oh no this unearthed a memory i had buried from kindergarten lmao"
"We had a set of twins in our classroom and once on their birthday party I said "your brother got such a cool party, i hope yours is nice like this too" to one of them and he was like "yeah, this one"
"4 year old me was not a very bright kid"
That's. How. Death. Works...
"Watching the documentary 'The Last Dance' when a Kobe interview pops up -"
"Me: "Wow, they must have filmed this before Kobe died."
"My wife: "Yeah, obviously…."
The cringe comes out of nowhere, and you're not even sure how you were able to ask something so incredibly stupid, but here you are. Lounging in the stupid air.
You Should Have Asked What "Nothing" Tastes Like Next
"In my head I was wondering what one pound of water would look like in terms of volume. What I said out loud however was "How much does a pound of water weigh?"
Keep Up With Me
"A couple of months ago, I got up and drove to work as usual. Later, my girlfriend texted me from home to ask me if she had left her sunglasses in my car. I told her I wasn't sure, but she could grab my spare key and go check."
"In my car."
"Which I had driven to work."
Black Is White, White Is Black
"I don't understand why people place bets on who wins, why not just place bets on who loses?"
"Yeah took me a minute to register what I said..."
And then there's these stories, where the person is probably better off cutting off any human contact henceforth going forward. These are rough to get through, folks.
Should Probably Have A Chat With HR After This
"I was about 4 months into my current job, feeling confident being fresh off the contract-to-hire period, now moved into a coveted full time role. While walking back to my office from the morning kanban I was stopped by my boss, head peeking out of the office:"
"Boss: "Hey TheMediator, do you have a sec?"
"Me: "For you, I've got lots of secs!"
"Boss: wide-eyes, mouth dropped"
"If you're curious why this was incredibly stupid/embarrassing, try saying the phrase "lots of secs" out loud. Preferably, not to your boss though."
You Don't Need College Anymore. Go Home. Bury Your Head In The Sand.
"In my freshman year of college I was dorming next door to a couple cute girls. About a week into the first semester one girl walked from the coed showers to her dorm room in her towel still wet. We were both unlocking our doors to get in our rooms when she looks at me and says…"
"I know I look stunning…(sarcastically)"
"To which I replied, "don't flatter yourself."
"I had to slid a note under her door explaining I was tongue tied as she was beautiful and I meant to say "don't be hard on yourself, you look great." (Or something to that nature). We became good friends."
It's In The Descriptor?
"Chatting to a homeless guy on the street and he told me he was feeling unwell. I told him he should be at home, resting."
"It's been 20 years and the memory of it still brings me out in a cold sweat."
Oh Good Lord...
"Asked my friend how his mom was doing at his moms funeral."
"Jesus Christ this is the worst one on this thread. What was his response?"
"He looked at me and then the casket and kind of smirked. I awkwardly started to try and explain and just said "I'm an idiot. You know I love you. Talk to you in a bit." He makes fun of me now and I can't stop laughing. It's a positive painful memory."
Own up to your mistakes. You'll garner more respect by acknowledging the awkward things you say, however, it's perfectly fine to laugh about it in the moment. That's probably the easiest way to escape the deep, deep shame.
The advice "fake it til you make it," though often said with at least a hint of sarcasm, does carry quite a bit of wisdom.
By simply putting one foot in front of the other, weathering the chaos of not knowing what's happening as you learn as fast as possible, we can find ourselves further than we expected.
Once we're there, reaping the fruits of all our "faking," we somehow begin to take on a new identity in people's eyes They assume we've always been in control and known what was going on. They defer to us for advice.
But that couldn't be further from the truth. So we keep on faking it.
Redditor espectro11 asked:
"What's your 'I don't know, I didn't think I'd get this far' moment?"
Many Redditors discussed their experiences navigating the intimidating environment of job applications, interviews, and offers.
Oh Right, Getting Paid
"I gave my resume to fancy private school (I'm a teacher, but new to the field) and I didn't expect a call back. But they called me today to ask my expected salary and I said 'I don't know what the average is. Let me Google it.' "
"Ya girl was not prepared."
"When I went for a walk-in interview looking like crap and they hired me on the spot. I get they were hiring for a new store, but they up and said 'if you want the job it's yours, when can you start?' "
"Deada** didn't think I'd make it that far."
Outside the Box
"Years ago I was applying to a bunch of copywriting jobs and feeling frustrated because I wasnt hearing back from any of the places I was applying to."
"It was especially frustrating because I was putting in all this time on cover letters and I felt like nobody was even reading them, so I said, 'Fu** it, I'm gonna write one that is more me.' I thought it was a dumb idea and never imagined that it would work, but somehow it did."
"I applied with this cover letter and the subject line "Copywriter: Will Work for Beer" to a job that I was very underqualified for. It managed to catch the eye of the headhunter for the ad agency and was enough to get me an interview. Shortly after that I was hired and ended up working there for a few years, but I remember thinking on my first day, 'I can't believe that actually worked.' "
Just Not the Right Fit
"An interview at Google. The 20 years younger than me was describing the peer review system."
"I responded with 'Jesus, that sounds awful.' "
"I did not get the job."
Others also shared experiences that centered on their working lives. But these stories weren't about being hired or interviewed.
These were accounts of long-developing success stories that they never would have predicted.
A Winding Road
"My entire legal career"
"I have four degrees and a 10 year career in commerical litigation. I just wrapped up a $200mil trusts lawsuit."
"I started at uni doing theatre and stand up comedy. I have no fu**ing idea where I turned to get here."
"Started at a very small company doing sales straight out of college. I went about messaging big corporate players (who obviously would never do business with us since our size) and was laughed at by my new colleagues for even trying."
"2 weeks later My boss was asking me what we (a team of 6) should say on the conference call with Toshiba Buyers."
Putting Fires Out
"Me at work. I feel like every issue that comes up has me unprepared. But I am always praised for my good work."
"So, I assume I have imposter syndrome and keep doing what I am doing."
So next time you find yourself ruling a possibility out completely, maybe take just a few seconds to imagine it actually occurred and prepare.
You just never know.
I'm going to be perfectly honest––I'm a city boy. I'm not a huge fan of hiking or camping. I happen to be a huge fan of running water. Have you heard of it? It's great. Highly recommended.
I've also, on a more humorous note, watched far too many horror films over the years and don't particularly like idea of running off into the woods only to piss off some demon that was perfectly fine until I arrived. I also have immense respect for our friendly neighborhood serial killers and demonstrate this regularly by staying out of their territory.
Those who love the great outdoors had plenty to share after Redditor Your_Normal_Loser asked the online community, "
Hikers of Reddit, what is the weirdest or creepiest thing you've come across while hiking?"
"The only reason..."
"When we were exploring the Australian Outback as university students, my friend and I found an old, tightly wrapped plastic bag with five or six damaged wallets along shrubbery at the base of a cliff.
The only reason we opened it up was because we were so remote - hundreds of kilometres from any town or tourist attraction - that it was strange to see garbage out there. All the cards were in female names and birthdates placed them in their late teens to early 20s. Some lived in the Northern Territory but one was in Sydney and another from Queensland. At the time we figured rock climbers must have stored their valuables in the bag and then lost track of it. I'll never forget the strange look the police officer gave us when we handed them in."
You see... this is why I wouldn't go mess around in the Australian Outback.
I also may or may not have watched Wolf Creek one too many times.
"A recliner on a small hill with a hole dug out in the middle and water bottles all over the place."
"A trashed campsite..."
"A trashed campsite complete with the tent cut open...
...do you report these things, or what?"
Or maybe not... you might want to turn back.
"The walls were completely plastered..."
"I was walking in a thick forest and came across an opening. In the center there was a shack made of lumber, with a bench built into it that was slightly leaned back.
The walls were completely plastered in porn."
Well... that's one way to get off.
"The man stopped talking..."
"I was backpacking with a few friends. A few days in the middle of nowhere, a man approached our camp as we were cooking dinner to say hi. We talked about our routes for a few minutes. Out of nowhere, he told us that he had had a vasectomy in his 30s after his 2nd child. Then somehow his wife had gotten pregnant with his 3rd child. He didn't believe this was possible, so he demanded a DNA test to see if he was actually the father. He was. Still, he explained that he had his doubts and thought that his wife must have fixed the DNA test.
My friends and I were in our 20s and had no idea why this guy was telling us this. We all just nodded and smiled.
The man stopped talking and then just walked away into the night."
"I stepped in..."
"I stepped in and fell over a cow carcass on a night hike. It was a bright moonlit night but I didn't see it in the shadows. Thankfully it was mostly dry."
"We still have no idea..."
"I was in the woods with three friends at night. A friend's house was nearby and I was getting hungry so I went inside to find some food. Another friend came inside with me. Two friends were still outside.
Later on, one of the two who outside came in and sees the indoor friend on the couch next to me. They panic and immediately run back outside.
I poke my head out the door asking what's going on, only to hear them yell as loudly as they can, "THAT'S NOT KEVIN"
Everyone comes inside and calms down a bit, and the story comes out. They thought the friend who was indoors with me (Kevin) had been outside with them this entire time. Why? Because in the darkness of the woods they saw a silhouette about the same height walking alongside them silently, then at some point it ran away and they were chasing it thinking Kevin was running off for some reason. The reason my friend yelled, "That's not Kevin" was to stop the last outdoor friend from chasing whoever was out there deeper into the woods.
We still have no idea who that was or why they didn't even speak."
This story sent a chill running down my spine.
Who was that?!
Perhaps figuring it out would be even scarier.
"Went hiking with my dad..."
"Went hiking with my dad one day over a ridge. A girl from the group in front of us tripped and slid down one side and was just able to hold on to the tiniest branch from the only tree around. Had she slid down all the way she certainly would be dead or massively injured!"
"I was trying to make my way across..."
"I was hiking in Washington sometime in December. I was trying to make my way across a river but the bridge was out. I was walking along the shore looking for a shallow spot but couldn't find one. I saw some footprints leading down the bank, my thought was that someone was trying to do what I was doing and decided to track the prints to see if they crossed. It was not easy but I followed the prints for about a mile. As I approached what looked like a crossing I heard a loud BANG like a stick hitting a tree. I froze for a few seconds and heard no other noises. I just slowly back up keeping my eyes on the other side of the river. Could not shake the feeling that I was being watched. Got the hell out of there quick as I could."
There are few feelings creepier than the feeling of being watched. It makes you feel like you've been violated in some way.
Thankfully you got out of there!
"I thought it was a magical, beautiful moment..."
"I was hiking with some friends, and I saw a cluster of butterflies on the ground. I thought it was a magical, beautiful moment until I realized they were congregating on a pool of blood. It turns out that someone had been hiking on the bluffs above earlier that day, and had fallen off and died."
Sooo... still want to go hiking or camping? None of this changed your mind? None of it?
It was nice knowing you. I'll stick with my running water.
Have some creepy stories of your own? Feel free to tell us about them in the comments below!
Have some experiences of your own? Have you also survived the hospitality industry? Feel free to tell us about it in the comments below!
Time is of the essence. And time is not definable. Those are lessons we learn as we get older; as times passes and fluctuates in front of us.
Time is always fleeting yet always catches up to us. I find myself shocked when I wake up on certain days and realize I'm a particular age of my parent that sticks out for me.
Like, how did that happen? I guess I should just be thankful I'm still here to witness it all.
Redditor u/TW1103 wanted to discuss the meaning... of time and all of its affects by asking:
What fact really puts the scale of time into an insane perspective?
Ok, who is watching the clock? Those seconds aren't going to count themselves. The only way to understand time is to be its witness. Although that can get depressing. Let's focus on the light and cool.
History...Calculate Figure It Out GIF by OriginalsGiphy
"If you are an 80-year-old American, you have lived through approximately 1/3 of our nation's entire history."
"The 80s were 40 years ago."
"This is what messes me up because I was born in 82 and graduated high school in 2000 so for some reason my brain is stuck on the 80's being twenty years ago. The 70's thirty years ago etc etc. I have to stop and realize sometimes that my concept of how long ago things happened is way off."
Time goes by...
"We observe that light travels at 186,000 miles a second, but given the vast size of the observable universe, that's a snail's pace. But from the point of view of a particle of light, time doesn't even exist."
"Time slows down as you approach the speed of light, and theoretically stops completely when you reach the speed of light."
Years Gone By...
"MLK Jr. and Anne Frank were born in the same year."
"Betty White was born in 1922. Automatically pre-sliced packaged bread loaves became commercially available in 1928. Betty White is six years older than sliced bread."
Long Live the Queen!queen elizabeth images GIFGiphy
"The queen and Marilyn Monroe would've been the same age."
I swear Liz is going to outlive dirt. Wait, I believe she already has. Well she won't be alone, she'll have Betty White. At least she better have Betty. Time is nothing without Queen Betty.
TV TimeSeason 2 Omg GIF by Paramount+Giphy
"Happy Days was a TV show made in the 1970s-80s about teenagers in the 1950s. Similarly, That 70s Show was made in the 90s-00s about teenagers in the 70s. If a similar show were to be made today, it would be about teenagers in the 2000s."
"If a T-Rex imagined a creature as ancient as the T-Rex is to us, it would be a Stegosaurus. If that Stegosaurus imagined a creature as ancient as the Stegosaurus is to us, it would be a Crocodile. If that Crocodile imagined a creature as ancient as that Crocodile is to us, it would be a Shark."
On the Clock
"On a twenty four hour clock the amount of time that humans have been on the earth would total around five seconds."
"How about this one: If Homo Habilus first appeared at midnight, 24 hours ago, that means the first Homo Sapiens appeared at 9:25 PM, or about 2 and a half hours ago. The first human civilization, in lower Mesopotamia, appeared at 11:57 PM, or about 3 minutes ago."
"The Western Roman Empire fell at 11:59 PM, or 1 minute ago. Everything that has happened since - the Crusades, the Plague, the discovery of the New World, the world wars, all of it - has happened in the last minute of human existence."
And that's just OUR Sun...
"The span of our lives are so insignificantly small that our Sun will last another 5 billion years. That's 9 zeros people. Our eldest live to around 100 in the best places. That's 50,000,000 (50 million) times longer than any person can reasonably expect to live. And that's just OUR Sun. The universe as a whole has probably existed for magnitudes longer than that already and will continue to exist until the end of time as we know it."
Tell Me a Storywilliam shakespeare GIF by will herringGiphy
"We know what a good storyteller Shakespeare was but there were Greek playwrights who wrote shows nearly 2,000 years earlier that are pretty good, too."
I hate time. Only because I'm petty and irritated of the amount I squandered. That's neither here nor there though. Time marches on and continues to amaze. I'll keep watching.