Around the world, LGB rights are slowly inching (or in some case hurdling) toward equality. From country to country, and sometimes even within a country, attitudes towards non-heterosexual relationships can scale from "Okay, so your point is...?" to prison, or even immediate death. Here, people from fifteen different countries worldwide shared what would happen if you were to say, "I'm gay" in their country.
1. Ireland
Northern Ireland is fairly accepting of gay people in general (although gay marriage isn't legal - even though it won a majority vote in 2015), but it certainly won't win any prizes for its acceptance of gay people.
I mean, nothing's really going to happen. You won't be killed. You might risk being kicked out of your house if you live with your parents, or severing ties with family and/or friends. Definitely, people will be less comfortable with being friends with you and you'll get more than a few looks and whispered comments. Be very prepared to be called a mean name.
In terms of your overall safety, you're pretty much fine.
However, I'm a teenager, and while a lot of adults I know are homophobic, most of my peers are pretty liberal on the matter, so hopefully the next generation won't care as much and we might finally get gay marriage legalised.
2. The UK
Being gay is pretty unremarkable. I mean its just who you fancy. Most common responses:
Okay.
From somebody who doesnt really care. A vast majority of the population.
OkaySo what do you want to drink?
Meaning I dont care, thats a bit weird that youd mention it, we should solve this slight pause with a drink.
Yeah, I know
I mean its usually not a surprise. From my experience, anyway. I cant remember ever being surprised.
What you do between the sheets, mate, none of my business
Someone who doesnt want to know. They may even be against homosexuality in private but theyll not say it to your face. This is a minority opinion in the UK, and hopefully won't be there at all soon.
3. Azerbaijan
Lesbian, gay, bisexuals, and transgender (LGBT) persons in Azerbaijan may face legal challenges not experienced by non-LGBT residents. Same-sex sexual activity for both men and women is legal in Azerbaijan, but households headed by same-sex couples are not eligible for the same legal protections available to heterosexual couples.
So, officially gays have same rights as heterosexuals. In reality, they don't.
Parents: It is more common for a father to express shock. Most probably he will act angrily first. Afterwards he will not talk with you. You will be ignored by him. Your mother will be a little more supportive than your father but still she also will feel shocked. Most probably your family will not force you to leave the home. Your brother will not talk and will not take you in serious. Sisters as always will try to understand you. This is a generalization, of course, but seems to be what happens based on gender roles here.
Friends: Friendship is one of the holy words in Azerbaijan. Your best friend will probably feel shocked, furious. Afterwards he will tell you not to tell anyone. I am talking about only true friends. Mates/colleagues: Some will ridicule you and some will try to avoid talking with you. Some of them will call you Dutch. In Azerbaijan, Netherlands is perceived as a paradise of gays.
Society: Majority of people definitely will not like you and everyone will try to avoid talking with you. You will be ignored. But some exceptions may exist. Some fraction of Azerbaijani society is (Continued)
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very open minded. Those people will come towards you and will try to support you. Some ultra-conservative people may attack you, especially in rural areas. So, it would not be 100% safe to say I am gay in society. In Azerbaijan homosexuality is not brand new. Some celebrities and governmental officials are gay and most of the people know it.
4. Canada
This is the Prime Minister of Canada. Earlier this year, Justin Trudeau raised a gay pride flag in our Parliament Hill.
Gay marriages have been legal here since July, 2005. Same sex adoptions are legal here. Transgender reassignment surgeries are covered by healthcare. If you told me that you were gay, Id give you a high five.
Our current Prime Ministers father, when HE was Justice Minister (before becoming Prime Minister) made Canada one of the first Western Nations to legalize Homosexuality itself; before that, consensual sodomy was a criminal offence. "The State has no business in the bedrooms of nation" is a famous quote to remember.
Canada is not without its flaws, but I am so very proud to call it home.
Anonymous
5. India
I remember our English teacher teaching us a peom called Daffodils by William Wordsworth. It's one of my favourite poems. One of the stanza in the poems reads -says:
The waves beside them danced; but they
Out-did the sparkling waves in glee:
A poet could not but be gay,
In such a jocund company:
I gazedand gazedbut little thought
What wealth the show to me had brought
Everyone started laughing when the poet called himself 'gay'. Our teacher explain that 'gay' means 'jolly'. I really liked how the word sounded.
This photo is from a Marathi show called Comedy Express.
Both of these people as men dressed as women. Men dressed as women is a clich comedy trick in India. It is seen as something awkward and funny. I know gay men don't always dress as women but I just pointing out that it is seen as something funny and unusual. What responses you get depends on your friend circle.
In my friend circle there is a guy who is really feminine, he may not be gay but he might be. In fact, he is a very nice person and a good friend. If suppose he comes out and says Hey, I'm gay. I'd be like, I thought so. You can expect to be made fun of. But then we make fun of Playboys and Virgins, and Singles and Couples alike. Most likely you'd be made fun of more often. But if your friends are discriminating against you because of that, then you're friends with the wrong people.
Now, if a stranger approaches me and says, I'm gay. I'd assume he's asking for a quickie so I'd say sorry, but I'm not gay. I mean why else would anyone go around telling strangers that he's gay.
If you're thinking of coming out in front of your parents I'd advise against it. Most Indian parents are conservative and may take you to a psychiatrist or a doctor. If you're sure that your parents are really open minded you can go ahead.
I have a bisexual friend, she has a boyfriend now, but says that she prefers girls more than boys. None of us really mind.
Overall, I must say, sex or sexual preferences are not a topic of discussion in India.
6. The USA
Our country (The USA) has finally legalized same-sex marriage. If you said you were gay in a public setting (depending on what State you were in) you could (Continued)
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reasonably walk away safe in broad daylight, but you may not feel very safe.
Our country is VERY big, and there are LOTS of people, and not every state is very kind to gay, lesbian, bisexual, queer, or transgender people.
If you said this in the middle of a restaurant in West Hollywood, California, nothing would happen.
If you said it in the middle of a bar in rural Arkansas, or any other middle American stateI dont know.
It could be met with stares, and at the very worst it may open you up to being the victim of a hate crime if you werent careful. People do get accosted walking to their cars.
As much as I would like to believe the entirety of my nation is a bunch of fun loving, feel good friendlies, we arent. We have our fair share of very ignorant, hateful, and fearful people.
Mike DiGirolamo
7. The Netherlands
What would happen if you say I'm a gay in your country?
We would say, "So, Youre Not Gay In Your Own Country?"
The Dutch are known for their dry humour (like wit but less sophisticated).
Although there are areas in the Netherlands where it wouldnt be safe to show same gender affection in public, for the most part the Dutch are pro-gay rights and the Gay Pride parade is almost like a national holiday. So, being gay in the Netherlands is not controversial.
8. Syria
In Syria, there are three cases:
You happen to say Im gay in a region that is controlled by armed terrorist militias, including, but not limited to, the Islamic State. Sharia law is the sole and only law that is applicable there. That means that you will be thrown off a high, probably the highest, building in downtown.
You happen to say Im gay in a region that is dominated by the Syrian regime. You will almost certainly be ridiculed and insulted by whoever you talk to. That would be mostly verbal insults, although it can definitely take a more violent form. If you are unlucky, someone will report you to the Syrian intelligence agencies, which will arrest, insult and perhaps torture you even more badly, and then maybe sentence you to spend some time in jail. I wouldnt expect death penalty in this scenario.
You happen to say Im gay in a region that is dominated by the Kurds. These areas have a de facto local administration and are subject to neither the Islamic State nor the Syrian government. The mentality and attitude towards you would probably be similar to the second case, but Im not sure whether anyone would care to arrest you, as the governance there isnt well-established yet (and theres a chance that the Kurds would actually be more tolerant, or so one hopes).
If you are a citizen of a developed nation who happens to be in Syria and publicly talk about their sexual orientation, then that would change nothing about the first case, but would probably help you avoid the torture in the second case (and be deported instead), and face less harsh consequences in the third case.
9. Finland
Here in Finland I think people would probably ask Ah, so youre a Swede. Its a running joke in Finland that (Continued)
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all Swedes are gay.
There are definitely anti-homosexual hate crimes committed in Finland, just like in most other places. There was a straight pride demonstration one or two years ago, organized by an ugly mix of Christian extremists and a very small contingent of Finnish neo-nazis.
But to most parts its a safe country for rainbow people.
10. Norway
In Norway, even the national protestant church accepts Gay marriage. The mayor of my town is gay, and no-one ever mentions it outside the local Pride Festival. If someone so happened to publicly say Im Gay, most people would probably either not notice because theyre busy taking snaps or listening to Beyonc on their phone, or just look at you with an air of supreme boredom and say yes, and?
Besides a limited number of conservative countryside folks (mostly followers of the Laestadianism sect), really, really far-right people, and extreme religious folk, no-one cares about others being gay, lesbian, bi, straight or anything like that.
Its just a non-issue really.
11. The Phillippines
You either shout youre gay or say to your friends that youre gay, it doesnt matter, Filipinos judge you not on your sexual orientation, but your action and attitude.
But, there is still a lot of stereotypes, in the Philippines, when a straight person thinks of the word gay, they imagine a cross dressing femme boy, and the word lesbian, they imagine a brutish boyish woman.
The Philippines is still new to the concept that not all gay people act flamboyantly or dress as a drag queen. Filipinos would be pretty shocked to learn that someone was gay but moves like a straight guy, this type of person is considered very rare. Also, when people see good looking gay men/women, straight guys regard him/her as cool and girl would want to befriend them
Our President is pro LGBT, he may pass the same sex marriage bill on his term.
12. China
In first tier cities like Beijing, Shanghai, Shenzhen (where I am), people are richer and better educated generally, so they dont care, or some of them would feel a only bit weird to hear someone say he/she is gay.
Actually, my colleagues and friends seem particularly fond of LGB people. It's like a unique quality, to them.
In small cities or rural areas, which is the main population of China, people mostly will (Continued)
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feel weird or even gross.
But China is a country of 1.4 billion people, so no matter where you are, there are always open minded and narrow minded people, and thanks to the fast penetration of internet to peoples life, Chinese people are learning about the outside world fast, and they are making huge progress on education and worldviews.
Welcome to take a look in China.
13. Eritrea
They wouldnt know what youre talking about, since theres no word for that in my country. After you explained it to them they would probably be grossed out and scream at you. After the police arrive you will be thrown in prison and face 3 years in prison for merely just being attracted to the same sex.
14. Mexico
It depends on which part of the country you happen to be in. There are States in Mxico that are very hetero-macho culture oriented (like Monterrey), but even there you will find open minded people who dont really care what you do under the sheets.
Very catholic people will try to convince you that homosexuality is against God, but they dont mean any harm, they just have different opinions. Most of these people will treat you okay.
I find it difficult to think that you will encounter physical violence, but hate crimes still occur, and transgender people are the most affected by it.
If you say I am gay in Puerto Vallarta, you may end up having sex that night since (Continued)
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is a very gay-friendly tourist area, lucky you! The same goes to other cities such as Guadalajara or Cancn.
In Mxico City, again it will depend on where you are since is almost a mini-world by itself. I think you will raise some eyebrows, but the general reaction will be something like meh. We are a city of more than 20 million, so we are not easily surprised here.
Mexicans like a good laugh, you may hear some jokes at your expense but you could always tell the difference between a harmless joke or an insult.
So, act as you are but if you sense you are in danger, use your mind.
15. Russia
In Western part of Russia and major cities you are very unlikely to be given hard times about that. If you dress stereotypically gay, you can get a few looks, but thats it. But dont expect most of the people to be appreciative. As everywhere else, young people would be more open-minded and interested. I have gay friends myself (I didnt ask them to tell), and my common reaction is, as a relatively young straight male - Thats okay, but why would I want to know? - because for me it makes no difference at all. And its really weird if you go on about your usual friend conversation, and, then, hes like, out of nowhere - Im gay. Makes no sense. But there are places around each town of course such as clubs, neighborhoods where the same statement will probably get you adored or laid, if thats what youre up to.
But the further you go east up to the Far Eastern part, the more caution should you exercise. People tend to be more conservative en masse and bad things happen.
Anonymous
But we should also be prepared and ready to ask the right questions to have a leg up on the competition.
"What is THE best question to ask on a job interview?"
A company's history or information about a past employee were suggested subjects appropriate for questioning.
Prior Knowledge
"When you were interviewing here, what would you have liked to know before you joined?"
"This worked for me. I asked my interviewer a question about how she had personally dealt with a company policy she had just explained. She bragged about her stellar adherence to the policy. I nodded my approval. I got the job."
A Previous Employee
"One that has always gone over well for me:"
"What were some qualities that the previous employee in this role brought to the job that you would like to see carried forward?"
"Another good thing to do is research the company you are interviewing with and you can ask things about what they may be involved in or you could drop that while reading about the company, you wondered this."
Hypothetical questions were suggested as helpful examples of inquiry.
Indicators Of How Companies Treat Employees
"A question that landed me a job once was: 'If I asked your direct reports about your management style, what do you think they'd tell me?' Stumped a hiring manager and he emailed me personally to tell me about it, no one ever asked him that question but got the job.
"In my current interviews I'm asking 'what did your company do for its employees during [the virus] to improve their day to day, work life balance, etc.' and I ask 'Is there anything your company adopted during [the virus] that they plan to keep post [the virus]?"
"These questions give a lot of insight into whether a company treated their employees well."
Past Performance & Adjustments
"If we were currently sitting in my 1 year review, what would I have done in this year for you to say I excelled in my role?"
"If I could snap my finger right now and change anything about your job or the company, what would it be and why?"
The following questions about a prospective company may not be answered from initial digging on their website.
Measure Of Success & Career Trajectories
"How is success measured in this role?"
"What are some possible career trajectories within the company that could stem from this position?"
Being A Solution
"Ask them what is the biggest problem you can solve for them in your first six months with the company. Similar to 'don't think of a purple hippo,' this forces them to imagine you succeeding in the position."
Simply The Best
"Who is your best employee and why is he/she the best?"
"You will then face 2 situations mostly:"
"panicking CEO who can't answer you 'Bob who works 17 hours a day for a slice of bread' so the fear in their faces must be a big nono for you"
"entusiast CEO who actually follow their business and can tell you who is an added value for the company and why."
– ThePiz91
My experiences with job interviews are different than others seeking work in office environments.
Having had a years-long career as a dancer, my "interview" was the dance audition, where hopefuls dance in small groups of people at a time after learning a routine and then awaiting their fate after the panel evaluates their performances.
The question I may or may not have asked in such a scenario earlier in my career was: "Did I make the cut?"
I did not make the cut. And I learned never to ask that again.
I remember the worst date I ever had. My biggest regret is that I stayed for the entire thing. I should've left as soon as I realized this was not going well, which was basically at hello. But he was paying so I drank, a lot. I'll keep names and dates to myself to protect the innocent.
0/10
Big Brother Reaction GIF by Big Brother After DarkGiphy"Went to brewery, date said I had hairy arms and that meant I was horny, said "you look really awful in this light" and then tried to dig out of that hole by saying in his native language that was a term of endearment long term couples said to each other. 0/10 did not date again."
Lucky 13?
"My wife wanted to plan our 13th wedding anniversary. I was excited because usually, I plan it. She bought us some new disc golf discs and after a quick supper, we went to play. We hadn't played in forever. We were laughing and I had a great time. She served me with divorce papers and told me that the date was a test to see if she still had feelings for me. I also learned that she was having an affair that started well before our anniversary."
- rmorlock
Two Hours from Home
"Not necessarily a date but a person I was dating invited me to his parent's house for the afternoon. He wanted to introduce me to them and show me the house he grew up in. I thought it was super sweet and had no problems going. He was also in the middle of moving and needed to pick up a few things, so it really didn't seem that unusual."
"Yeah, we got there and it was awful. His entire family was there. They traveled from hours away too. This was not just meeting the parents, it was meeting the ENTIRE family. Even worse? At some point, this idiot told his parents that he had proposed. We had been dating TWO months. I spent the entire afternoon dumbfounded and just playing along."
"We were two hours from home and I had no cell service, no way to leave at all. We ended up spending the afternoon brainstorming wedding ideas and planning an Alaskan honeymoon that his parents planned to gift us. His brother even called to say congratulations! We drove back to his apartment in silence. When we got there, I got in my car and left, didn't even bother grabbing my stuff. Weirdest experience ever. I have no idea how he broke it to his parents that we weren't getting married."
You're Cut Off!
"Got set up on a blind date once between mutual friends. She shows up to the restaurant already a little tipsy, orders multiple appetizers and only takes like one or two bites from each one. Then she proceeds to order 3 or 4 more drinks and is visibly drunk at this point. She gets up and says she's going to the bathroom and staggers off. About 15-20 minutes go by so I try to call her several times but no answer."
"Finally I decide to pay the check and just leave. About 2 hours later I'm sitting at home and I get a call from an unknown number. It's the police department. She was picked up on a DUI on her way home after she ditched me and gave the cops my number to see if I could go bail her out!"
- mox44ah
Sorry?
Bbc Three Idk GIF by BBCGiphy"Well, I gave this answer on a different topic, but it ties in with this. We were out on a date, we had been seeing each other for a while, close to a year maybe. She gets a phone call. Suddenly she looks destroyed. Her fiancé had just died in a motorcycle accident."
What in the world? I mean how can we ever expect to pair off with the dating pool being inundated with liars and nut jobs? I'm going to delete my apps.
Girl, Bye.
Sassy Beyonce GIFGiphy"Had a girl openly flirt with the bartender in front of me. She says she wasn't. But handing him her own phone and asking for his contact info in front of her date seems like it to me."
Crazy!
"Came out from a movie, late at night, and date's Camaro was stolen. Apparently, he called his WIFE (that I did not know he had) and let her know where he was and what happened. She showed up and realized he was on a date! She started chasing ME around the parking lot telling me she was going to kill me. Saved by the cops who showed up just in time to take the auto theft report."
Hey Mom
"Met a girl at a country bar one night in my 20s. We were both pretty drunk but hit it off pretty good. Ended up getting her number and we agreed we'd go on a real date. Fast forward to the date, she gets in my vehicle and... she looks almost identical to my mom. I was mortified. I was polite and we went for lunch where I found out she also had a boyfriend she "wasn't sure if she was into". Never talked to her again."
- SgtGo
Liars...
"When I was in college many years ago, before the advancement of cell phones and social media, I was chatting with a girl I met on a BBS who lived on Long Island, NY. I was 18 at the time, but lied and said I was 22 because she said she was 25. We spent a few weeks emailing each other, as well as calling each other."
"We even exchanged pics. When we finally met up, things blew up. Turns out we both lied about our ages: She was really 33, and lied because she thought she looked younger. She admitted she sent a college photo to me. We still had dinner together, but it was awkward as hell. We never spoke again."
Doubles
Kill Me Now Season 1 GIF by FriendsGiphy"It was a double date. She was more interested talking to the other girl throughout the whole thing. Found out later from the other guy that his girl cheated on him with my date."
Ummm... I think I'm just going to stay single. That is a handful of crazy. Why can't people just be honest? I swear the search for love warps people's brains. Be careful out there people.
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