Once you're old enough you quickly learn that "happily ever after" is basically a myth.
All those fairytales, books, movies, plays, music... they're all propaganda funded by the maniacal minds at Hallmark. Ok, maybe I'm exaggerating, but not by much.
I've learned that there is great power and purity in being single. And choosing to stay single isn't the taboo it use to be.
Love can ruin you. And people can be selfish and crazy. Finding the right "one" isn't worth one's sanity.
In the immortal words of the late, great Ms. Whitney Houston... "I'd rather be alone than unhappy."
Redditor Vast-Paint-4184 wanted to discuss all the reasons why many of us steer clear of the search for the four letter word... L**E. They asked:
"What is keeping you from dating?"
Right now, Covid is my main reason for staying out of the hunt. No thank you. I've avoided it for this long, I can wait a little longer.
Place and Time
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"I currently live at home and have tried it a few times, but it's just so weird trying to date while living in my parent's house. I'm moving out on Saturday, so things might change?" ~ drpepperzerodrinker
Moving On
"The girl I was into isn't into me and now I'm a sad sack of potatoes waiting for myself to move on." ~ clarkkentisnotsupes
"Unfortunately you may never move on that way. Try meditating on it, ask yourself why it upsets you so much, why you care. You might learn something about yourself." ~ PvtSmuffler
"It's worth a shot I guess. It upsets me cause I care. I care because I loved someone who doesn't feel the same way, which is also fine. It's not the first time, might not be the last time either. I truly wish for her the best the world has to offer. It sucks now, but I trust it won't tomorrow." ~ clarkkentisnotsupes
opportunities...
"Few opportunities to meet others and not much disposable income." ~ JustMeStopping
"By (30 cishet M here) To add to this but does anyone else get to feeling that everyone else around your age group basically left and you don't consider any younger or too much older than you w/out feeling skeevy?" ~ Polaris271
"They didn't so much leave as they got busy in their own relationships and families. Pretty much every person I meet around my own age is already in a long-term relationship (usually cohabitating). The rare ones who are not tend to either be newly single parents or nuts." ~ JustMeStoppingBy
Flaws and all...
"I just don't think I'm worthy of becoming someone else's significant other. Too flawed, too self-conscious." ~ NetworkLoveLine
"This is part of a concept I see as people try to start from a place of perfection and subtract from there. The real way should be (and I know this is a tough paradigm and not practiced much, if at all) to build to on one's positives and minimize the negatives."
"We're all flawed in some way, shape or form. Some of my wife's flaws are what I like best about her. Charming in lots of ways.Some others drive me nuts, but that Hollywood version of true love is something that rarely happens. And the fact is, it changes greatly over time."
"But she helps me overcome my person flaws and I help her. We're not even close to perfect and the relationship takes work and understanding.In short don't worry about what you aren't and focus on what you bring. It's good to be self aware but keep to the positive." ~ Stay-Thirsty
Hungry Episode 11 GIF by The Simpsons
All solid reasons; except the dumb one, don't call yourself dumb. You're smart for avoiding disaster, start thinking there.
Nobody!
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"I don't like meeting strangers and I don't want to date anyone I know." ~ Stormallthetime
Lack of Potential
"The fact that I have nothing to offer for my potential date. I would be gatekept on dating apps and all of my friends have already run out of candidates for them to introduce me. I should have just picked one when I was flooded with blind dates and arranged marriage meetings back in the days." ~ ExSogazu
These Low Effort Jobs Have Surprisingly High Salaries | George Takei’s Oh Myyy
Have you ever worked one of those jobs that paid you to kinda sit there? If you have, you know the joy that comes with watching the entirety of Breaking Bad ...The Past
"Still not being fully over my last breakup, being busy all the time and having an unorganized sleep schedule, my depression and tendency to isolate myself, my self hatred and difficulty to accept that anyone would actually want to be with me if they knew me for who I was, my social anxiety and awkwardness, there's a lot of reasons I guess but I'll stop there." ~ CandelaBelen
Pounds of Issues...
"My weight, I've been trying to lose it for the last 3 years but it's really hard, I've only messed up my knees and elbows in the process and gotten bigger. Also I don't look good in any pictures I take, and I don't have friends to take pictures of me since they're all married and we don't do fun stuff together anymore, so that makes dating apps difficult." ~ Affectionate_Bass488
The Joker GIF
"oh well"
"I remember in the later years of me being single, I'd asked a girl out and she said she had a bf. I just thought 'oh well.' I know I have a lot to offer as a partner in a relationship, she was very pretty and loved my jokes but just didn't work out. I just smiled and said 'no worries, it was nice to see you again!' and put her out of my mind. Went back to focusing on me, there will be another opportunity with someone else. (There was)." ~ illmatic2112
A Bad 3
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"I've had 3 different women cancel a first date in the past 10 days. So I'm not sure what is keeping me from dating but it's getting real old real quick." ~ Half-Mayonnaise
"I'd love to see reddit blame this on you somehow." ~ andtheywontstopcomin
It's Me...
"I recognize that I'm a pretty selfish person, when it comes down to it. And I prefer spending time alone. I'm always going to put myself first. I don't see any reason to put someone else through having to deal with someone like me." ~ samuelgato
Off Course
"Being unemployed, in debt & back living with my parents. Would be different if I was working so I could at least have a plan for tackling my student loans & moving out." ~ Stefie25
Social Issues
"I don't want to put my photos and life online. Low confidence. Not much of a social life. The occasional woman I meet who I find attractive is either taken or not into me." ~ oblongunreal
Broken Parts
"Schizophrenic and not wanting to burden a partner with that, fixed income therefore can't afford it, knowing that a relationship isn't a mechanic shop that fixes broken people, not wanting to have a kid and pass on the ugly or the crazy." ~ codename_pariah
Unavailable
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"The idea of having someone close to me physically and emotionally is repulsive. my parents don’t really get along and, now I feel that i will become like them if I am in a relationship. I know I will no be able to give them the level of affection and comfort as them because I will be emotionally unavailable for them." ~ Alexmorte
Lacking Options
"Being transgender doesn’t help my potential date pool (after I pick through the 'bicurious,' chasers and fetishizers). Also it’s just very difficult to find someone I vibe with who is near my age, a tiny bit responsible, a tiny bit attractive, understands consent and boundaries, and isn’t interested in using me as a sex experiment. I also prefer people who aren’t addicted to hard drugs or people who participate in violent crimes." ~ doodlearm
Being my Lowest
"I gained 100lb this year after starting my weight loss journey 2 years ago, losing 50lbs, and then quitting my workouts and dieting. I’m working towards drop this weight and having a better physique. For now though I’m not focused on women until I’m back at my lowest weight." ~ poluting
Marriage goes sour?
"We just cannot rationalize it. Like any functional human we have a base desire to have sex but we realize that’s just biology telling us to procreate. Introduce another person to the mix that is time, money, and energy that could be used for anything else. Also dating is a natural precursor to marriage which we view as the ultimate waste given the times we live in."
"Marriage goes sour? Well there goes years of our life, and money wasted. We would rather not date at all. Things are much too complicated than they need to be these days and we would rather do things simply. Meaningful friendships yes. Dating no. Rather be alone but not lonely." ~ RK9Roxas
Faithless...
"Confidence, which is ironic considering I don't lack in confidence. In all other areas of life I am never in doubt of myself. It's not confidence in myself that I'm lacking. I simply don't have much faith in humanity as a whole." ~ HuemanLikeU
Love is elusive, and that seems to be fine for many. Who wants to share a bed and money and food anyway? I want all of that for me. For now...
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Never miss another big, odd, funny or heartbreaking moment again.
When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
Money Burn GIF by nog
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Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
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See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.