Photo by Steve Johnson on Unsplash

Spoiler Alert: It's probably not because he's short.


Rejection can be rough. Like ROUGH rough.

That's the case for anything, but when it's rejection as a potential romantic partner, you kinda take that personally.

Having said that, rejection is a fact of life. Nobody is entitled to anyone's time. Nobody can make someone like them back.

Everyone needs to learn to accept and to deal with rejection in a healthy way, but statistics show that men in particular tend to react to rejection in dangerous ways. So let's get a better understanding of when rejection happens, and why.

Reddit user TonekaMaliawco asked:

What type of men get rejected most?

... and the answers they got might not be what you'd expect.

It's A Matter Of Math

Calculating Russell Crowe GIF Giphy

"Men who put themselves out there. But they also have more success as well."

"I'm a woman but one of my guy friends decided to approach attractive woman randomly, start a conversation and ask them out. He made a goal of approaching like 10 women a day."

"He did this because he wanted to get better at approaching people and "girls" was a good motivation for his impulsive butt. Said friend is a decent looking dude (not ugly but not a model tho, nerdy, prefers tennis to the gym, could do better with style as he has a tendency to only wear shorts, still working his way up the ladder). He was rejected a lot of the time especially at the beginning."

"But sometimes they'd say yes."

"He ended up going on a fair amount of dates with some fairly attractive and successful women (like at least 10+ including some doctors, lawyers, financial people) and is in regular contact with a few (he gained a short term relationship, a tennis partner, etc)."

"Some other guys think he's got some sort of lucky touch. But for every date he went on, he was rejected by quite a lot more."

"You miss the shots you refuse to take." - Rainfal

"This is super accurate."

"In my mid 20s, I had a coworker (19 y/o) follow me around all the time. I think he had a man crush on me or maybe idolized me for some reason."

"I would always chat up a storm with attractive women, got some dates, and one day he asked me how I was able to do that. I'm probably like a 6 on a good day."

"I asked him how many times he thought I've been rejected in my life. He didn't even try to guess."

"I told him too many times to count. He built the courage to put himself out there and had a date within the month." - DabblerGrappler

Let People Work

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"Any guy who asks someone out who is clearly just trying to do their job."

"It's different if you see each other all the time and have actual chemistry, but if you ask the McDonald's cashier for her number while she's trying to hand you your order, she's gonna say no." - CompleteSmoke5370

Multiple Times

I Dont Want To Season 1 GIF by Friends Giphy

"The ones that don't understand that 'no/I'm not interested' is a completely valid response. They get rejected by the same women, but multiple times" - MindLikeAMinefield

"C-C-C-COMBO" - cara27hhh

" 'Playing hard-to-get eh? She'll say yes next time!' " - Inaka_

"My Perspective"

Schitts Creek Comedy GIF by CBC Giphy

"I have no idea how it works. I only know my perspective and I thought of a few things."

"Being honest is important; just meeting people you really match with & not changing yourself to be liked or playing games."

"Being fit is a good idea because you look good and are also more healthy and positive."

"Being clean and tidy helps because being able to keep things together is a good thing."

"Finally, it's good to have a variety of hobbies to be able to have interesting and engaging conversations."

"You don't need many people to like you to have a good life. Just make sure you care for people who genuinely care for you and don't neglect them or use them, try to 'trade up' or be an a-hole."

"Just accumulate a few cool people" - Captainofreason

Net Fishermen

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"The ones who seem to be interested in almost every person they meet."

"I've had a couple relationships that I broke off a few months in, but the ones I flat out reject immediately are the ones who spread their nets out wide. Like they just want a partner, they don't care who I am as long as they think I'm cute enough."

"If a guy is flirty with everyone I'll be friends with him, but by the time he asks me out it had better be clear that he has thought through the reasons for asking me specifically." - urajerknotajoker

Don't Bore Me

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"Boring men. Be passionate about something, have a hobby you care about, be exited about learning something etc." - nuride

"Woman here: You're all forgetting boring. I'll overlook many things if I'm laughing with someone and the conversation is interesting.

"I don't need you to have an endless list of cool hobbies. I mean don't be boring to me. I need a partner who holds an interesting conversation with me."

"Writing stories together and discussing the writing process would hold my attention on a date, talking about shopping would not, for example." - Spirited-Hall-2805

"Hideous f*cking chud who married above his level here, can confirm. Don't be boring."

"Being funny, actively listening, and reciprocating genuinely in conversations will lead to good times and people wanting to be around you more often." - LongPorkJones

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A simple gesture from a good samaritan can go a long way. It could even inspire a chain of people paying it forward. But there's a certain rush in knowing yo...

Entitlement

christian bale laughing GIF Giphy

"Men with too much self-entitlement. Like, the 'but I was nice to you, I deserve a relationship/sex for that!' type."

"Or thinking that because they're attractive, they are entitled to a relationship/sex with you." - gibsunn

"The ones with an 'entitled to have you' mindset." - aftensjerne

"I'm a woman and I'll reject a man who acts like he's too good for me or would be doing me a favor by asking me out. My self esteem is too healthy for that." - Responsible_Point_91

That's Not Respect

"Men who only treat women in their life well if they are attracted to them and are actually mean or horrible to other women in their lives. This is a big indication that when things go sour for any reason, he will not be respectful." - melty-icecream

Now, for whatever reason every time one of these questions is asked - people come crawling out of the woodworks to expose themselves as bitter, angry, cynical, "nice guys" etc.

These people decided to chime in and demonstrate exactly why they're getting rejected:

Wow, Stage 4 Cancer??

Awkward Cardi B GIF by Saturday Night Live Giphy

"I think at this point only skinny hipsters and women that look like Shrek in yoga pants actually have relationships."

"Everyone else is too picky to actually get along anymore and just f*ck around until they realize they need to make some weird verbal contract to actually manage to be around each other for a length of period of time."

"I can tell you though, cynical sh*t heads like me couldn't attract a woman with stage 4 cancer even if I had the cure." - Skwareblox

If You're Only Friends So You Can Date Her...

"Good Guys. The ones who will sit there and be your best friend and help you no matter what the problem is."

"I was one of those guys and I would always see the girl I like date some f*ck boy who would treat her like sh*t and she would be into it."

"It was really weird and every time it would happen the guy would always kiss her or do something 'sexual' in front of me to basically show off like 'you see what I can do and you wish you could do.' "

"It was all around annoying." - D3adp00l52121

"That's very 'nice guy.' "

"Nice is a veneer for ulterior motives, kindness is actually caring about a person." - jupue87

"There's a difference between saying your nice and actually being nice, guy." - Iron_Chip

Hopefully we learned something here today... I don't know what it was, but hopefully it was something.

Photo by UX Gun on Unsplash

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