First dates are already a cocktail of nerves and excitement. Odds are you might say something awkward and or not phrase something the way you pictured in your head, and that's cute, don't get us wrong.

And then there's saying or reacting the way these people did.

Classic "Shmosby"

"He said he was in love with me and he couldn't live without my scent. It was the first date. I didn't check if he's still alive lol"

Freckles1339

When Your Date Throws You Into The Line Of Fire...

"Dating an extroverted woman that convinced me to go out dancing/cubbing with her. She got drunk and started talking sh-t to some chicks and their boyfriends somehow and telling them that I would bear them up. The bouncers stepped in but they were mean mugging me all night. I thought I was going to get curb stomped or shot at coming out of the club."

BidDaddyFarts

There's a lot you can say about someone who gives off the following vibe on a first date.

None of it is good, but you can say a lot.

Asserting Imaginary Ownership

"He took me out to several different bars and was an @ss the whole night. Plunked me down in a seat and promptly ignored me. I struck up a conversation with the lady next to me. Her husband was talking to someone on my other side. My date comes up to me as the lady and I are exchanging numbers. He accuses me of trying to start a lesbian relationship, takes my phone, and leaves me at the bar. I had to walk back to his place to get my car."

"I knocked on my door and asked for my phone back. He gaslights me, telling me he didn’t have it and I must have dropped it. The next day I got my phone back and he got upset when I told him we weren’t seeing each other anymore. Sat outside my house a solid 5 minutes after I kicked him out."

MuffytheBananaSlayer

Overcompensating For Something

"I just turned 18 and met this guy at a job I was at. My long term partner had recently passed from a drug overdose and this guy invited me to a classic car show."

"I wasn’t really interested in him, but my parents said I should go. I decided why not. He complained because I didn’t wear a dress (first red flag)."

"Then, he asked me if I was afraid of guns. I said not really, I’ve shot them before."

"Well, he pulled out a pistol in the middle of the car drive. I was hours away from home with this guy that I just met, and he had a gun. This was at the beginning of the date."

"I tried to get him to take me home, but I had to spend several hours with him. I ended up getting away from him using the bathroom excuse and calling my parents."

"It was the worst and most frightening date I have ever been on."

Hello891011

GUNS

"I once hooked up with a guy while I was in college (I’m also a man) and, after we were finished, he started talking about guns and asked if I had ever held a pistol before. I said no and he pulled one out and handed it to me. I didn’t want it but he was super insistent and I just remember it being shockingly heavy. I handed it back and tried to be as cool as possible while leaving and going to the car."

"Told him I’d see him again, told him the gun was cool and thank you for letting me hold it, told him to text me soon, etc. Once I was gone I blocked his number and was more paranoid about who I slept with going forward."

Esosorum

And then there's these, stories so harrowing you almost wish the person never went out on the date to begin with. Doesn't matter if they ended up married in the end, no one should have their life threatened on a date.

Dude Needs To Work On His Pickup Lines

"i was once told in the car coming back from the date that i would look good in the coffin. i swear to god that i left his car in the middle of nowhere and yet i felt safer than sitting next to him."

awellintentionedmess

"Wtf that's some psycho sh-t. How did you leave?"

Biosentience

"literally jumped off. still i was nice. i told him i didn’t like what he had said to me and told him to pull over and then i left. i didn’t want to risk since there was a big covered plastic bag in the backseat with something in it. watching all these crime stories all my life made me being really conscious at that very moment. paid off. later in life i found out that there was an axe in this plastic bag."

awellintentionedmess

Be A Better Person Than This

"When I was 18 and naive, I went to the cinema with this guy from tinder and the whole time he kept touching my leg and trying to put his hand up my skirt. It gave me the ick and just wanted to leave."

"After the movie he dropped me home and I went upstairs to bed. About 10 minutes later I turn around and the guy from the date is stood in my bedroom threshold. I was home alone for the weekend too, so I started to panic."

"I asked him why he was in my room, and he said he needed the toilet, knocked but apparently I didn’t hear so he let himself in. At this point my heart was pounding in my chest and I didn’t know what to do."

"He said he had a really nice time and basically pushed me onto my bed and started kissing me. I pushed him away as nicely as possible and said my mum would be back in a minute."

"He then left and I locked the door behind him. I didn’t sleep that night and was terrified he’d break in or something."

smf101

A Happy Ending, At Least?

"I went on a date with a girl not knowing that her ex boyfriend was in a local Mexican gang. She had just broken up with him about a week prior… he didn’t take that well. On top of being a garbage human for physically and mentally abusing her, did I mention he was in a f-cking gang? She and I went out on a whole date, multiple places, back to her house to drop her off."

"I don’t realize until I’m leaving the parking lot of the restaurant we went to that we were being followed… all the way back to her house. I dropped her off, and the guy continued to follow me. Knowing I don’t go home, I make intensional turns and things to confirm he’s following, and he was. Called her, she said don’t go home and I’ll call you back."

"She called me back 20 minutes later after I drove through 2 different police stations and she said “you’re okay to go home now, just act normal” which isn’t sketchy at all. I went home, he followed and drove off… I walk to my apartment door and there’s 30+ Mexican gang members there and her cousin who’s in that gang, as well as her brother who isn’t but knows them. I had never met them before, so I was like I’m dying today. The brother asks how I’m doing, and said “just go inside, you’re good.”

"They stood outside my door and in my apartment complex for 4 hours and then went home after the brother knocked on my door and said that shouldn’t ever happen again."

"That girl I took on a date, ended up dating for 3 years and is now my wife and we had our first baby in September, and celebrated our first year of marriage last week."

MTB199262

“let’s go outside”

"I don’t want to make this story too long, but I met this guy on tinder that I really liked and we went out dancing and to get drinks. We were talking for weeks but this was our second time going out together. During the time we were talking, there were a lot of little red flags that would tell me he drank too much, but I was a lot younger and naive back then and tried to give him the benefit of the doubt."

"Any who out of no where he’s like 'let’s go outside' starts messing around on his phone and is telling me 'I’m trying to find us a way out of here' and said the guys standing by the door were after him. So I’m like okay, let’s go back to my car so maybe we can go somewhere else. My car was parked pretty far away because we had gone to multiple locations that night.. anyways he gets it into his head that multiple people are after him."

"Like random people on the street. Once we were in a part of downtown that wasn’t so busy, nobody around, he started to think that I was out to get him too. I was trying to call his friend (who was nearby) to come get him but he took my phone away from me because he thought I was calling the cops, and then he threatened me. I got scared because I thought 'if he hurts me here and leaves me here, nobody’s going to find me until morning' and it was pretty cold out."

"His friend eventually came and got him and I left. Once I was safe I was jittery all night from the anxiety having been in rocky relationships before. I told him about it the next morning and he didn’t remember any of it. I broke things off shortly after."

cheese007_

Bye...

"Woman asked me back to hers, got there and she introduced me to her boyfriend....noped outta there."

Candy_Lawn

The Crazy One

"I was at a guy's house, it was like our 4th time meeting and we started getting a bit more touchy and kissed more, I said I was gonna head home around 12 as I had a long day and he got in my face and got super aggressive and angry about it, like a child having a tantrum asking me why I didn't want to stop over at his place, this guy was 6ft 6, huge muscular guy who could probably pick me up with one hand."

"I stood my ground and told him to stop overacting and respect my decision. After that blow up I never saw him again. Should have seen the flags as he always claimed his exs were crazy... looks like he was the crazy one."

spiralgalaxym83

Broken

"I took my date to the city from the burbs maybe a 15-20min ride. I was 17 and had an old S-Class Benz that I bought from my dad's friend an old timer who didn't use it too much and owed my dad some money for work on another car. The car ran like a dream and I loved it. We were on the way and traffic started to build up so I removed my foot from the gas and as I braked I noticed the gas pedal was stuck at about 60mph."

"Without thinking I reached down and tried to pull the pedal back. I did it just in time without her noticing. I didn't tell her anything and the date went spectacular. I damn near broke a rib bending like that. Don't forget to stretch kids it could save your life."

Jenghrick

Get Sober

"Was on a date with a girl who proceeded to get very drunk, by the time we finished eating I had to carry her out. Honestly I didn’t notice she was that drunk during the date. Probably cause she was Korean and her English wasn’t very good, that and I was a horny early 20 something I kind of just assumed she was being silly on purpose."

"Well she was so drunk I had to walk her like 9 blocks to where I had parked the car since we had done some window shopping before settling on a restaurant. I have never felt more stress than walking a nearly blackout very attractive Korean girl 9 blocks in the middle if the city with people all down the street giving me looks. I honestly wanted to take a less popular street to avoid the looks but thought that would for sure look way creepier."

_Steve_French_

Oh Well

"First date with my wife she took me off roading and when we went over a hill into a dip a donkey was just chilling in the middle of the trail, we drove off the trail and finally came to a stop without hitting any of the car sized boulders that are common in that area. The donkey just stood there the entire time not giving AF."

Peelboy

Walk On By

"We were walking by a river and he said « don’t worry i won’t drown you today » Safe to say i didn’t go out with him again."

zestygerman

Dumb Move

"We were driving past a police station. She was looking for something in her bag. Placed a big bag of weed on the dashboard, with cops outside. This was well before the acceptance and legalization of it. Not that it would have mattered as it was not a small bag. No one saw it, but what a dumb move on her part."

TheBklynGuy

Hi Mom

"I recently went on a second date with a girl (we’re both in our mid-late 20s) at a café and 20 minutes in a middle-aged woman at the table next to us just butted into the conversation. I was kinda confused until she introduced herself as the mother, and then she proceeded to hang out at the table for like 5-10 minutes before leaving. It was incredibly awkward, and although I kinda smoothed past it in the moment it did weird me out that her mom was just spying on us without me knowing, and the daughter never acknowledged her either until she joined in."

Reddit

Nowhere

"There is a popular beach near my university, and you need to drive though a road that looks like it takes you to the middle of nowhere. Freshman me didn't know this, and I swear I thought I was going to die during that 10 minute drive."

pups_and_doggos

Be open. Be honest. Be your true self. These are the simplest ways for you to make a real connection on a first date.

Unless being honest means taking a gun out. Just, don't.