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Rules People Have Tried To Enforce That Backfired Spectacularly

Corporate woman at work at desk
Photo by Microsoft 365 on Unsplash

Most of us have worked somewhere or attended a school where there were some ridiculous rules in place.

Nothing might bring us more joy than to see some of those rules backfire.


To have a laugh, Redditor TabblespoonFarmer3 asked the sub:

"People of Reddit, what stupid rule at your work or school backfired beautifully?"

The responses their fellow Redditors came up with were simply glorious.

Micro-Managing the Clock

"A boss was worried we were 'stealing time' by using the bathroom for too long. So being the nutjob he is, he locked all the bathrooms in the building except the ones he could see from his office door, shut off water to them, put out-of-order signs on them, and he would sit there with a stopwatch timing us between walking into the restroom and walking out (these are all one-at-a-time restrooms) and then would call out the time."

"This was STUPID over the top and almost positive is illegal but he never made a policy officially restricting bathroom time... he just wanted to make everyone feel uncomfortable if they took too long."

"I discovered that with my height, it was really easy to go through the drop ceiling and over the half wall and I was the only other person using the men's besides my boss, who is short... so I went in... locked it from the inside and did my business and climbed out the ceiling leaving the door locked so my boss could not get into the bathroom when he needed to go and was forced to use the ladies... which led to our female employees complaining that he was taking too long in their bathroom."

"To this day, I don't know if he ever figured out how I was doing that."

- geoffbowman

"My boss started putting 'all staff required to start 15 mins earlier than indicated' on the roster. I started keeping track of my unpaid overtime and stung her for three paid days off. That’s not required anymore."

- muthaclucker

"I worked at this company that had mandatory 1-hour lunch breaks. Since we ate on the premises, our lunch break was often 15 minutes or so."

"We tried negotiating having shorter lunch breaks so we could leave earlier and beat traffic. The next day, an e-mail was sent from the owner stating the fixed work and break hours for the whole team, and they were to be followed with no exceptions."

"Cool! Next week, a big client called about halfway through our lunch, and nobody moved. It rang and rang until the said owner took the call, talked to them, and immediately came to scold us. 'Sorry, boss, as per your rules, we are off until 1 PM, no exceptions.'"

"A couple of weeks later, we did some work on-site for the same client. They were, to be honest, one of the coolest clients I ever had in my life."

"They took us out to lunch, and while talking we ended up relaying the owner's rule. They had a big chuckle over it, and while the project lasted, they made a point to always call while we were at lunch break just to annoy the owner."

- LGMHorus

"A place I used to work had a rule that executive-level staff needed to be contactable when on leave, so they had a section on the leave form for the address of where you'd be staying and a contact number."

"Some knuckle-shuffler in HR decided it applied to all staff and the shenanigans began. People would put down the address and phone numbers of sex shops, sports grounds, and medical clinics. I gave the latitude and longitude of the place I was going camping and the UHF frequency channel my radio would be tuned to."

- Flight_19_Navigator

"My company used to be a small startup. In my first year, I was the Project Manager and Architect for a global system rollout."

"I put in my vacation days for 'Burning Man' six months out (in February), and my PTO was approved. Then a few months later (~June) my boss (who had been head of the IT department) got a new boss (new head of IT)."

"With a month to go until 'Burning Man,' the new head of IT told me that my project rollout was too important for me to be uncontactable at all and that I would need to take a satellite phone to 'Burning Man' or my vacation would be canceled."

"We were still three months from going live but he decided that we were at a critical moment that I had to be available for."

"However, neither my boss or the new head of IT wanted to carry out the daily $18/minute satellite phone calls with me, probably because they knew it was violating some labor law. So they got one of the guys in the London office to call me in the Black Rock Desert each day."

"I said I wouldn’t take the calls before 1 PM, which was 9 PM for our man in London. Every day he called, he had had a few beers, and didn’t give a s**t about project updates, he just wanted to know what parties I’d been to and what art I’d seen."

- blue-mooner

Questionable Measures of Productivity

"Management decided that lines of code written per week were a good metric for determining software engineer productivity."

"You want a 3-line function stretched out into 50 lines? I’m your captain."

- smares21

"Not mine, but an old roommate of mine was a senior developer for a small company. It was an open secret that one of the other senior devs, a guy who had been there since the beginning, would sometimes spend time looking at plastic surgery photos, before and after shots, photos of active procedures, etc."

"He did it enough that people would poke fun at him about it, but he didn't seem embarrassed about it, and it wasn't harming anyone."

"Well, one day a project manager said something to the CEO about this guy's ongoing plastic surgery obsession, and the CEO flipped. He said that going forward, no one was allowed to use their work computers to access external websites AT ALL."

"Anyone who's ever been a developer knows that half the job is googling stuff, so this policy pretty much halted productivity in its tracks."

"It only lasted a day before the CEO retracted the rule, but let everyone know that their browser history would be monitored going forward. After that, no one really changed their behavior, they just started remotely accessing their home computers to browse instead."

- Salsa__Stark

"I worked at Starbucks for like 5+ years before and during undergrad and at one point our district manager thought it was a good idea to implement a 'just say yes' policy, where we literally weren't allowed to tell the customer no."

"It lasted for about three months and in that three months, our unaccounted product and waste went up over 300% because when the system didn't have a way to punch in a customer request we had to just do it anyway."

"We also got complaints from stores in surrounding districts because they had angry customers who were requesting things that were against local food service code, and told them that we did it for them at our store."

"I knew exactly how that policy was going to play out and I just laughed every time management was freaking out about the problems it was causing."

- yunglilbigslimhomie

"My spouse's workplace realized they didn't have a policy about sending sexual images or jokes as part of their email acceptable use policy, so they added it."

"Except they made it a firing offense to send or receive sexual content (I think the intent was to stop people from subscribing to such content). They also said that your access would be immediately revoked until a determination was made."

"So someone got fired for something else and decided to send their whole management chain a graphically sexual image, then report it using the anonymous tip line. IT got the report, concluded they did indeed receive sexual content and did as required: suspended all the involved email accounts, including the Senior Vice President's."

"The policy has since been reworded."

- loljetfuel

"The bottom floor of my secondary school was a square that had a corridor all the way around. After some incident where a kid got knocked over, they implemented a one-way system."

"Unfortunately, they were Very Strict on enforcing it. If you accidentally walked past your class, you couldn't just turn around. They seemed very proud of their new rule... until everyone started showing up late for class because they had to do extra laps of the bottom floor."

- FrosnPls

Saving Money

"My old workplace had a control freak bean (money) counter."

"At one point, she decided that any purchase of equipment must come with documentation showing that we had searched around the internet and could prove we got the best deal. Honestly, it was unenforceable, so our supervisor just told us to ignore it and that he’ll deal with the backlash."

"So one day, I had to buy some tools for the workshop, and I happened to come across a bunch of coolers on sale. It just happened that we needed coolers to transport stuff, so I bought one."

"I brought it back, we measured it and found it was the perfect size for what we had planned."

"It turns out that time, the bean counter was watching us. She came strolling into my supervisor’s office with a printout from Amazon and the boss in tow, saying that she had found a similar cooler for cheaper."

"My supervisor took a look at the printout. 'So you found a cooler that’s 2 dollars cheaper.'"

"'Yes!'"

"'How much time did you spend looking this up?'"

"'Just one hour of work.'"

"And you think [our employee] should have spent one hour of his workday shopping for coolers?'"

"'Yes!'"

"'You do realize we pay Rum $17 an hour? We needed three coolers. Right now, he grabbed those coolers while out on a supply run. And you’d rather have him spent an hour of his day, at $17 per hour... to save $6?'"

"'And while we’re at it!'" The supervisor pulls out a broken vice grip from under his desk. '... this is the Cheapo brand vice grip you approved. Now, this is fine for your regular at-home needs, but we’re a workshop and need some quality stuff. We have been using a Goodstuff brand vice for 3 years. Cheapo lasted six months. Do the math.'"

- Rum_N_Napalm

​"I worked for a consulting company, traveling Monday through Thursday somewhere in my country. We had a pretty good hotel allowance (enough for 5-star hotels) and a great rule: if you stayed with a friend, you got an allowance (about a third of the hotel allowance) to buy gifts for the host."

"I got the rare treat of a 6-month project in the town of my best friend from childhood who was going to university. We made a great arrangement: I would crash at his place and spend the evenings drinking beer, watching movies, and playing video games. In return, I used the gift allowance to order dinner for the two of us."

"After submitting my first expense report, I was told by some HR drone that the gift allowance was supposed to not be used for food for myself."

"So I booked a room in a 5-star hotel, was upgraded to a junior suite because of my rewards status and invited my friend to evenings of beer, video games, and room service."

"After my second expense report, the project manager asked me about the tripling of the expenses compared to the first report. After explaining the situation and pointing out what sum of money it would mean over the six months, he got in contact with HR..."

"Two days later, the rule was rescinded. The project even got my friend (the then newly released) PS3 as a thank you for letting me stay with him."

- alphager

"I was working as a medical assistant at a private practice medical clinic. Our clinic manager wouldn’t allow the new receptionist to drive to the bank to deposit cash. Made her walk carrying the money bag so that she couldn’t 'drive away with the money.'"

"Bizarre. I know. That went on for a few weeks. Then the receptionist was mugged and over $1,000 in cash was stolen. She was allowed to drive after that."

- IndyMazzy

"The dealership I was working at decided they wanted to save money by not having the cleaning crew come in after hours. People started leaving the dealership to go home to go to the bathroom because they were disgusting."

"I lived pretty far away so I would just go use the General Manager's private bathroom."

- Jeheh

"We couldn't buy drinks at lunch with cash money, had to buy some vouchers. They were just cheaply made laminated pieces of paper."

"This was 2001, I was 13 and bored. Scanned the vouchers and printed them out on paper that kinda matched the color of the vouchers. and laminated them myself. They were horribly made and not even the right color on the backside. Also crudely cut out."

"I 'made' about a hundred of them and passed them out after I tried paying with them for myself and encountered no problems. Made some new friends and upped production."

"It took them about three weeks to find out but by then the fake ones had intermingled with the real ones and had already been resold to students via the student office. About half of the vouchers sold were fakes."

"Drinks were cash only from then on. They had no choice but to accept the fake ones for a little while longer though, as they had sold and charged for some of them."

- VloekenenVentileren

The protocols that are often set up at workplaces are questionable at best, but the stories told here are truly laughable.

Do you have any similar experiences with workplace or school rules backfiring? Sound off in the comments below.

People Who Witnessed A Teacher Break Down In Tears Share Their Experiences

Reddit user throwthrowwthrowwww asked: 'Students who've witnessed their teacher cry during class, what happened?'

Apple on a stack of textbooks
Element5 Digital/Unsplash

Teachers are not only educators, they're also inspiring leaders.

The most memorable teachers are those who genuinely encourage young students to do their best so they can be empowered to pursue their dreams.

However, we tend to revere them to such a degree, we forget that they're people too with real emotions.

Curious to hear from strangers who witnessed a vulnerable moment from someone they were inspired by at an early age, Redditor throwthrowwthrowwww asked:

"Students who've witnessed their teacher cry during class, what happened?"

There's no bigger heartbreak than people who are struggling with illnesses or know of someone facing medical challenges.

Ailing Teacher

"One of our music instructors 7th-12th grade. She had a long ongoing battle with stage three/four cancer. She always did her best to try to have fun during our classes, like it was an escape for her because she loved music so much. Over 85% of the entire high school joined choir because of her. Her chemo and radiation treatments left her exhausted some days, though, and she would occasionally break down. In 2012, when her condition worsened, she would have to take more days off because the cancer had become so debilitating."

"We continued to practice our songs while she was gone, and I swear we would sometimes spend an hour on one small section of a song, ripping every note apart, and repeating the same words over and over until we couldn't mess it up. One of the final days in class with her, I remember we were rehearsing for our upcoming state competition, and we sounded damn good. Mid-song, she stopped conducting, closed her eyes, folded her hands, and listened as we continued singing for her. The energy and sound was so profound throughout the room, I can't find the words to describe it."

"After the song finished, we stood in a long, complete silence before she opened her eyes with tears streaming down her face. She wasn't able to go to our state competition with us, but we ended up placing that year. It wasn't first like we were hoping, but it was the highest the school had ever placed. She later passed away that same year. She was one of the strongest women I had ever met in my life."

– Top-Box2372

Losing A Student

"My high school Spanish teacher also taught some homebound students with medical issues."

"One day the vice principal came into our class and told Ms J that one of her homebound students had passed away from his cancer. She couldn't hold back the tears."

– que_he_hecho

Wise Toddler

"I’m a teacher, I cried in front of my toddlers when I got a call from the hospital telling me it was time to make the call as to whether to pull my dads life support. One of my toddlers came up to me while I was crying, put her hand on my cheek and said 'it’s ok to feel sad, it’s ok to cry,' then gave me a hug. I love my job."

– Cheekygirl97

Students witnessed the following teachers get emotional.

Thoughtful Sixth-Graders

"The class surprised him on teacher appreciation day. Someone brought pop, snacks etc. He was surprised. 6th grade teacher."

– Stephlynn1234

Appreciation Day

"Had a philosophy course in uni during covid. So the class was held on zoom. It wasn't teacher appreciation day, but it was the second to last lecture of the term and we all really enjoyed this prof (and because of him most of the class became friends). So we organized an appreciation thing for him."

"We all started class without our cameras on, which was unusual and made him question (he got sad actually). So one girl said 'before we start, we just really wanted to do something for YOU because you've done so much for us. I hope this is okay.' He gave us a confused look, and before he could say anything in response we all turned our cameras on and held up signs saying 'thank you professor [name]' and our green screen backgrounds were of his face lol. He laughed so hard but started crying. Told us how he wished we could do this in person and that he genuinely cared about all of us."

"He had a lot of health issues, the most prominent one being MS. Whenever he didn't start class on time we all got worried, and there were a few times where he cancelled altogether because he fell or something. He also had a cat, and we asked to see him just enough times that his cat learned what time our class was at and would climb up to see us and stay the whole class. It was cute. During the breaks he would email a link to play chess since he lived far from his family and couldn't visit and wanted the company. We organized a Christmas movie day with him over the Christmas break and he loved it. He retired after the following year because of his health, and I still wonder what he's doing now and if he's doing okay. I've been in uni for 5 years now and he is the only prof I've actually spoken to consistently and genuinely liked."

– Burnt_Your_Toast

Sad Literature

"5th grade teacher reading Where the Red Fern Grows out loud to the class. He shed some tears. He did every year."

– SnoBunny1982

"Our teacher read that book to us in 5th grade also. But when it got to that part, she elected me to read it and she left the room. Luckily I had read it before and knew what was coming, but it was still rough."

– MIBariSax81

The Private Life Of An English Teacher

"I forgot his name, but he was one of my favored teachers in high school. He taught English."

"During class, he was called out to talk to some members of the school administration and a few proctors. It took several minutes. But he returned, taught as much of the class as he could, and then just walked over to his desk and started crying. Whimpering. He then left."

"He just found out his wife, who had also been a teacher, was having an affair with one of the female students. We didn't find out that specific fact until later on though."

– Typical_Samaritan

Some students, however, can force a teacher to realize they're in the wrong profession.

Bad Attitude

"Student that had behavior issues and a hard time maintaining emotional regulation threw his recorder (the instrument) at the music teacher and it snapped in half. He then threw his desk in her direction and walked out. This was 3rd grade, and all she had asked him to do was listen to the song we were learning. She quit the next week after almost 30 years of teaching."

– Last_Tuesdays_Beans

Bullying The Substitute

"Ms. Hanlon... Substitute teacher, I still think about her and hope she's doing well. She was posted as the teacher when the usual teachers were off sick. Absolutely zero respect was given to her and the class knew if we had Ms. Hanlon it was just an extended lunch, we could just mess around and act like animals for the whole lesson."

"She had physical conditions like a dent in her forehead and a gravvely voice which prevented her from being able to raise her voice to tell us to be quiet. So the kids would all do Hunchback of Notre Dame impressions, spitballs through straws and do the 'coughing game' where they would just cough through whatever she was trying to say."

"Even as a kid I felt kinda awful after we'd essentially broken her and she'd just come in not even say hello and pull open a book for the hour and sometimes cry into it. I weirdly still think about her randomly once or twice a month, I hope she moved on to way better things. School children really have no filter at all."

– PNCL

Absolutely Zero Respect

"Substitute teacher in Jr High must be among the world's worse jobs. 8th grade we had a sub that demanded and got no respect. Kids would throw stuff at her etc. She left the classroom crying then the vice principal, who was not to be messed with, came in and took over."

– woolash

Major Mockery

"I had a substitute teacher named Mr. Crane who looked exactly like Ichabod Crane from the old cartoon. Some kids in the class bullied him relentlessly for this and he just kind of broke down one day. Poor guy."

– backflip10019

In seventh grade, I witnessed a classmate talk back to our homeroom teacher and saying very inappropriate, bullish things to her in front of the whole class.

But that didn't make her cry.

What made her tear up was when another student defended her and yelled at the bullying student for being out of line.

It can be a pleasant and exciting surprise to see a friend or family member show up on the evening news.

Particularly if it is a story showcasing their accomplishments or allowing them to let their voice be heard on an important issue.

Of course, showing up on the news isn't always a joyous occasion.

Indeed, some people tune in to find their friends and family on the news for reasons they might hope people will eventually forget down the line.

Redditor Miguenzo was eager to hear stories of a loved one making the evening news for less than brag-worthy stories, leading them to ask:

"What’s the dumbest reason somebody you know landed on the 6 o’clock news?"

15 Minutes, Or Four Seconds, Of Fame...

"Years back, there was a college scholarship scam going on here."

"These companies would go to high schools and do a presentation, and grift parents into paying a large sum for the company to help get a scholarship."

"My mom took one look at this and was like, 'this is a scam'."

"My uncle bought it hook, line and sinker and paid up."

"And received absolutely nothing."

"So he calls our news program and they do a feature with this company in their 'hall of shame.'"

"My uncle was absolutely THRILLED."

"'They interviewed me for 4 hours!'"

"'It's going to be huge!'"

"We all sit around the TV."

"It's February 2000."

"Boom, there's my uncle!"

"They do the lead-in..and then, there's my uncle saying..."

"'They said, uh, sue 'em'."

"My uncle is screaming."

"'What the Hell?! They were at my house for 4 hours!'"

"We still have it on VHS somewhere."

"My uncle's star moment over in seconds."- JKW1988

Episode 19 News GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy

Preserved For Posterity...

"My college roommate got stuck in an infant swing at a public park and firefighters had to use some type of Jaws of Life contraption to cut the swing down and cut her out of it."- Nocomt

Oops!

"I know a guy who was interviewed on camera up in the mountains where there was a forest fire."

"He had been up there fishing with his girlfriend."

"He was married."- Fezig

Close Call

"Dude was swimming laps in a lake after dinner (i.e., around sunset)."

"Predictably, he got bit by an alligator."

"I saw him on the news, shirtless in true Floridaman fashion, with a little bandage over each tooth mark."

"The bandages made a dotted line around his shoulder and chest in the shape of an alligator's mouth, like he was in a cartoon or something."- BigRedRobotNinja

Tiere Bis Unters Dach Swimming GIF by SWR KindernetzGiphy

Unpaid Extra

"There was a park nearby that had no drainage and was bowl shaped."

"So if it rained hard, this baseball park/ football field turned into a mini lake."

"It rained a lot one day and the news did a story just showing how much it rained, and in the background behind the news-woman, from out of frame you see my friend rowing past her in a kayak."- hook_killed_pan

Right Place At The Right Time?

"A fight broke out at a HS football game."

"Turned into a huge brouhaha.'

"They intervened this dumba** friend of mine on the local news, the only bit that made it into the broadcast was him saying 'For the first time in my life I was happy to see cops!'"- KneeDragr

Awww...

"Marrying their pet goldfish in an underwater ceremony, complete with a wedding gown and guests in scuba gear."- Candies-For-You

Illustration Swimming GIF by Ordinary NadeeGiphy

Strike!

'A childhood friend’s dad embezzled money from the local Little League team."- Key-Zebra-4125

How Did He Even Make It To The Freezer?

"An ex boyfriend of my best friend’s sister ended up on the news for breaking into a Checkers through the drive through window and locking himself in the freezer until the cops arrived and arrested him."- pineapple3712·

Ice Cream Snack GIF by My/Mochi Ice CreamGiphy

Setting An Example...

"I got filmed and aired sticking a swab up my nose at drive thru covid testing."

"I had just declined to be interviewed at my car because I was afraid of getting someone sick."

"Test was negative, and my sister got a new pic for my contact profile on her phone."- idiotsavant419

Criminals Don't Ususally Wait In The Check Out Line...

"My friend was going to target with his mom to buy a tv."

"They stopped at Starbucks in the store."

"When the worker asked what the wanted he said “'he money in the register see' like an old timey gangster, then laughed ordered and payed for their coffee and went into target."

"While they were pushing their cart with a tv in it to the check out line the swat team surrounded them and arrested him for armed robbery.. was on the news."

"Got charged and everything."

"The first hearing the barista could not point him out and the judge threw out the case."- MACHOmanJITSU

Returning To The Scene Of The Crime...

"A guy from my high school stole Michael Jackson's glove from the Motown Museum in Detroit MI in early 90s."

"He returned it."

"I knew it had to be him, and yep, it was."

"I remembered him because he dressed like Michael Jackson every single day of school for years."

"He did it really well, too."

"He also didn't talk much."

"So, I was surprised to see him talking to a TV reporter about it."

"I hope he's doing well."- ATK80k

Animated GIFGiphy

Some people crave their 15 minutes of fame and embrace it however it may come.

Others only hope that no one they knew happened to be watching their local news that night...

Even though they know deep down that all their friends have it on their DVR and are never planning to erase it...


People say the darndest things after -- and sometimes during -- lovemaking.

Maybe it's the euphoria.

Maybe it's the adrenaline.

Maybe it's the tequila.

It's always good to have a kind-hearted joke on hand or a generic compliment.

Or maybe just grab your belongings and skedaddle.

Redditor ella-es-julia wanted to hear about the craziest pillow talk stories, so they asked:

"Men of Reddit: What's the weirdest thing a girl said to you after sex?"

The weirdest I ever got was... "What city am I in again?"

Geography matters.

Morbid Much?

In Bed Home GIFGiphy

"Met girl, went on date, brought girl home, had the sex, finished the sex, laying there she says 'What would you do if I died right now?' and demanded an actual answer."

Vixxay

Meow

"Not to me, but as she walked over to the bathroom after the deed, she said 'I just did your owner' to my cat. Sexiest thing that ever happened to me."

shlanky369

"My Fiancé and I were about to start going at it when the cat appeared from under the bed and stared at me. I went, 'Babe the cat is here. I don't like how he's staring at my boobs."

"Fiancé grabbed the cat and yeeted him into the hallway with the phrase, 'Get out you weird pervert.'"

"The cat proceeded to (without his claws) smack the door over and over again while screaming for a few minutes straight. Pervert."

Trumpet6789

POP!

"'I need you to take me to the hospital. Something is now bleeding and hurts.'"

"Turns out her ovarian cyst popped. We're still together with the running joke of sex so good it put her in the ER."

DasBatt

"Ah ah ah, 2 hemorrhagic cysts ruptured, I was bleeding internally, but only a little bit. I'm still impressed by how quickly you went from a naked sex stupor to being ready and carrying me to the car. Good times."

"In the ER when they asked me what happened all I could do was shout 'we were f**kin!' through my tears. That memory still makes me laugh."

Straystar-626

Damn it's Good

"We were going at it for some time then her face went instantly from 'damn it's good' to full-on crying. I stop, ask her what's wrong and she tells me 'I can't cheat on my boyfriend, it is wrong.'"

"So this is when I learned that the girl that I met on a dating website and that I started seeing 3 weeks before and that she told me she was single had a boyfriend for over 5 years. Got her to talk more, and she told me she was on the dating website to see if there were guys better than her boyfriend so she could end up with someone better."

"This was like 20 years ago, a coworker I have right now knows her (his girlfriend is like a distant relative of hers) and I learned she had 5 different boyfriends since then, cheated on all of them except the last one (for now). She was also a cam model in secret, one of the boyfriends was a high-paying customer."

draftstone

A Binding Contract

"'Pleasure doing sex business with ya.' We then shook hands."

"Still together 5 years later!"

Tatarstan

It's nice when people who have great sex make great partners.

And it all starts with a handshake.

Sleep on It

“'I don’t usually say this but, yeah, you can stay.'"

lennyukdeejay

"Did you high-five after that? Seems like that statement called for it."

EvilNinjaX24

"This is the best one."

TomKhatacourtmayfind

Tiny Dancer

"Not really weird but I slept with this girl while backpacking Asia, she was also a backpacker. After a bit of chillin'/talking, I got up to get dressed, she looked at my flaccid manhood and said 'You're quite shy when you're not excited.' I thought it was hilarious."

fleetwoodsackk

"That's a much better way to put it. My wife, when we were just dating and had moved in together and eventually saw it flaccid just said 'Aww, it's so little.' Thanks, hun, exactly what every guy wants to hear."

striker180

Fine!

"She said 'If I get pregnant I'm keeping it.' I was dumbfounded and when I didn't respond quickly enough she got really agitated like I had hurt her feelings and yelled 'Fine! You don't have to be involved if you don't want to!'"

"We had just met that night. My condom use skyrocketed after that night."

Fullyme

"When I was a poverty-stricken college student I was banging a girl who said, 'If you get me pregnant I’ll take you for everything you own.' I said, 'All I own is my bicycle. You want that?'”

OrwellWasRight101

Amen

"Best weird compliment I ever got was 'Damn boy, you f**k like the Devil!'"

"I married her, we still goin' at it."

BeBearAwareOK

Well, these certainly created some lasting relationships... or hilarious tales to tell their friends.

Do you have any stories to share? Let us know in the comments below.

woman in black pants and red tank top
Jakayla Toney on Unsplash

Giving compliments is pretty easy, although most of us don't do it often enough.

Accepting compliments can be much harder.

Too many of us immediately shift into disclaimers to explain why we don't deserve the praise.

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