School is supposed to be where we go to learn things.
Unfortunately, sometimes the thing we learn is that adults are big fans of ridiculous punishments for ridiculous and seemingly arbitrary things.
One Reddit user asked:
What was the most ridiculous thing you got in trouble for at school?
and hey it turns out school really DOES prepare you for the real world where rules only apply to some people some of the time!
Who Do I Ask?
Algebra teacher yelled at me for asking for help.
First, he told me "Don't ask me. Ask your partner first!"
Later, I turned around and asked my "partner" for help. The teacher then yelled me at again "Don't ask her. If you need help ask me!"
I Know My Own Name
American Horror Story Fx GIF by AHS
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My parents wanted my name to be unique and went with an extremely uncommon spelling on top of a rare name.
My first grade teacher called a parent-teacher conference to impress upon my parents that I refused to spell my name correctly. Before the parent-teacher conference, when my teacher refused to let me use my first name correctly, we negotiated that I could use my middle name.
That's when I proudly told her my middle name is Apostrophe. This lead to her claiming I'm a liar on top of my sh!tty attitude - all of which she told my mother.
I'll admit, I had a shitty attitude because I 100% knew my name and my name's spelling - and I loved it. I was frustrated with this dumb witch of a teacher who seemed to hate me for some reason.
My mom was furious and chewed my teacher out for making her leave work early for something so stupid.
Shockingly that incident did not make my teacher like me more.
If you know a kid struggling with a unique name... the children's book 'Crysanthemum' is great. Was my favorite book for a long while after this incident.
Intimidating
Reading a book.
Apparently the head of History found me sitting on a bench reading across from her office window "intimidating".
I was a grungy 90's white kid just sitting there minding my business.
- klc81
How the hell do you read "in an intimidating" manner...."reading intimidatingly?", "intimidatingly reading at me, causing me to fear for my life and safety?"
"Tattling"
In grade 1, there was a day where everyone brought in their favorite stuffed animal. The teachers warned us not to bring valuable ones because there was a chance they could get damaged.
I brought my favorite stuffed animal. The teacher's daughter and a boy in my class completely and purposefully destroyed it; ripped it, cut it up, colored on it).
I went to the teacher and told on them. They got absolutely no punishment for destroying my stuffed animal. The teacher reprimanded me for "tattling" and told me that I shouldn't have brought a stuffed animal that I cared about, since there was a risk of it getting damaged.
Most of the teachers in the school were really awesome, but that one was decidedly not. I didn't get along well with her daughter, and she always took her daughter's side.
When Your Locker Is Too Far
Not putting my jacket and back pack in my locker.
All of my classes were on the first floor and one end of the building. My assigned locker was on the second floor and in the furthest corner from my classes. I would have been late to every class, so I just never used it.
The administrators refused to move my locker... so pretty much every day this one teacher would write me up and I got a couple of in school suspension for it.
Finally after a few meetings I got the principal involved and she essentially told the teacher to leave me alone.
- Met90LX
Rural Life
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One time in 7th grade I was talking about how I went hunting with my dad over the weekend. The school made me talk to a counselor about it
I got the same crap in grade 1 for saying that I helped my grandfather kill turkeys over the weekend.
My 4th grade teacher was one of those people who would always ask on Monday what you did during the weekend. She went around and made everyone in the class share what they did.
Hunting is a big thing in my state, so naturally when the season opened a lot of kids said they went hunting and got a 6 point buck, or 8 point buck, etc. After about the 5th or so kid said they went hunting the teacher got mad and said something to the effect of, "Ok, no more stories about hunting, talk about something else you did."
That's not fair, what if someone else went hunting and that's all they had to share? If my memory is correct, that is exactly what happened. More kids said all the did was go hunting so they had nothing else to share.
The teacher got mad again and stopped asking what everyone did during the weekend.
No Touching
Two month into the first grade I got suspended for lightly touching the arm of the teacher.
This wasn't the first time I got in trouble with her. She was very very strict and I grew up with my rather laid back mother and I've been to a lets call it "hippie kindergarten" (Kinderladen).
So this teacher was my first real authority person.
We were standing outside at the class room door, there was a lot of noise and I wanted to tell her something but she did not listen. I do not remember what it was. So I touched her arm lightly to get her attention.
I got suspended and the school janitor watched me until my mother picked me up.
I did switch schools after that to a much more understanding and patient teacher.
The Guy With 12 Guns
So I was the good nerdy kid in school. My sophomore year we had a new principal and she saw some video that showed a guy with 12 guns hidden on his body.
The new principle made a rule that your t shirt had to be shorter than your fingertips at your side. I'm a small guy so all my shirts were non compliant.
So long story short I was sent to in school detention for the first time in my life.
I loved that PSA video!
Let's see him walk with all that hardware. Unless he gets wheeled in Hannibal Lecter style on a dolly, he'll be lucky if he doesn't just sound like a toolbox falling down the stairs.
Half the guns would slip out and clatter across the floor, and the other half would quickly follow as soon as he tried to bend over.
JUG Units
Jesuit high school. Detention was called 'jug' it stood for Justice Under God. It was in 30 minute unit intervals of sitting in silence doing nothing after school. If you missed it without an excuse, it doubled.
There was a school rule that you had to check the jug list every day. Well, I didn't. I was given two units intended for a kid with a similar name to mine.
By the time I realized I had jug, it added up to 16 units. I explained my situation to the person in charge of discipline. He saw my point and removed the original 2 units. But, since I broke the rule of checking the list, I had to do the other 14.
That's 7 hours.
The Wrong Blue
I got in-school suspension because I wore blue tights under a dress. They were not a school-approved shade of blue.
This was my senior year of high school. My school decided to enforce a dress code. Navy was one of our colors, but apparently my tights weren't navy enough.
I was a straight A student who never got suspended till this.
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In fact, some mistakes are so astronomical that they're remembered for decades afterwards, leaving the one who made the mistake a legacy of being a dumba**. Here are a few of them!!!
U/ronjans24 asked: What was the biggest mistake in human history?
Some may argue that the existence of the Universe was a mistake. I disagree. It was clearly Zayn leaving One Direction. But these next few were pretty bad too.
If you do the math, this is also the reason why Hentai exists.
I'll say the wrong turn Franz Ferdinand's driver made that went right in front of Gavrilo Princip.
EDIT: yes I'm aware war may still have broken out even if Franz Ferdinand wasn't assassinated
Imagine you're Gavrilo Princip. The assassination plot you and your friends had been cooking up for about the last year or so has been a complete and total disaster, just a monumental f*ck-up of the highest degree. You're staked out at this deli thinking maybe, just maybe the car will pass by, and by some stroke of sheer luck, it does.
If you're Princip, this is nothing short of serendipity.
Petition to return to the ocean.
Ocean Surf GIFGiphy"Many were increasingly of the opinion that they'd all made a big mistake in coming down from the trees in the first place. And some said that even the trees had been a bad move, and that no one should ever have left the oceans."
"In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move." - Douglas Adams
This was, in fact, a monumental mistake.
Sears not beating Amazon to the punch.
Blockbuster not buying Netflix.
You thought THOSE were bad? Well gear up for their next few, because they are 100% accurate. Except the one about Cats, that movie slaps.
I don’t know sports, but sure.
Seahawks not running it.
I used to wear a Seahawks jersey whenever I took a test because I knew I would pass when I shouldn't.
CATS is great, y'all are just boring.
GiphyThe Emoji Movie.
That live action movie about Cats is also up there.
Very fair point.
Social Media.
Humans are not wired to have that many social interactions and maintain that many relationships. Plus the echochambers it allows people to create for themselves, no matter how conspiratorial or vile their beliefs, means that stupid/evil people are no longer shunned into changing their mind.
Not sure it was worth being able to see what a celebrity had for lunch or what new "dance" your younger cousin and her tween friends are doing.
But in all seriousness, some horrible things may now have happened if the right thing was halted at the right time.
Washington called it.
George Washington Disney GIF by Hamilton: An American MusicalGiphyVoting for people based on what side of the political spectrum they're on. George Washington himself advised against political parties because he thought they would cause too much division in this country. Unfortunately for everyone, he was right.
Big oops on that one.
Barack Obama mocking Donald Trump at the Correspondents Dinner might have led directly to his 2016 run....
"Now, I know that he's taken some flak lately, but no one is happier, no one is prouder to put this birth certificate matter to rest than The Donald," Obama said. "And that's because he can finally get back to focusing on the issues that matter — like, did we fake the moon landing? What really happened in Roswell? And where are Biggie and Tupac?"
Then he turned serious: "But all kidding aside, obviously, we all know about your credentials and breadth of experience. For example — no, seriously, just recently, in an episode of 'Celebrity Apprentice' — at the steakhouse, the men's cooking team did not impress the judges from Omaha Steaks. And there was a lot of blame to go around. But you, Mr. Trump, recognized that the real problem was a lack of leadership. And so ultimately, you didn't blame Lil Jon or Meatloaf. You fired Gary Busey. And these are the kind of decisions that would keep me up at night. Well handled, sir. Well handled."
This is the best Star Wars and no one can change my mind.
I'll take 'Star Wars Christmas Special' for $100.
That atrocious pile of manure gave us Boba Fett, so without the Christmas Special there won't be The Mandalorian.
Wow, in this article, I openly admitted my love for Cats AND The Star Wars Holiday Special. So maybe my existence was the biggest mistake of all.
ANYWAY, I hope you enjoyed, and I hope you all feel a little bit better about yourself. Because when push comes to shove, at least you didn't accidentally start World War I