Working retail is the secret to being angry literally all the time.
Customer service is already difficult, but retail, with its low pay, long hours, and difficult streams of humans you're dealing with on a daily basis is enough to drive even the kindest, most sane human up a wall.
And when you get those people who seem determined to make it harder.....it's anybody's guess what your next reaction will be, including yours.
Here were some of those answers.
This Or That
This wasn't an incident that made me angry, but rather I was going to lose my sh*t in the sense this interaction made me feel like I was losing my mind.
I worked at a weird Starbucks that was drive thru and walk up only, there was no indoor seating. There were signs on either side of the walk up window displaying a menu with a photo of each product that was listed. If I was working at the walk up window I couldn't see the menu, even if I leaned out the window as much as I could.
One day a woman came to the store, asked me a question about parking or something, and then ordered. She pointed at the menu and said "Could I have that one?"
"I'm sorry, which drink are you pointing at?"
She points again, "That one."
"I can't see the menu from here, could you tell me what drink it is?"
"I really can't see the menu, can you tell me what it says?"
What the heck? Maybe she doesn't speak English. No, she asked me something in perfect English earlier. Maybe she's embarrassed to pronounce the drink name wrong? Maybe she's illiterate?
"What color is it?"
"Do you want a hot or cold drink?"
"Do you want something with coffee, or maybe something sweet?"
"Did you want a frapuccino?"
It went on like this for a while until I gave up and just rang her up for a grande iced caramel machiatto. She seemed perfectly happy with it when I handed it to her.
She Hit The Floor, Next Thing You Know, She Got LOW
I worked at a department store. I was in charge of the truck and stocking. Usually this included making the department I worked look good, refolding clothes, straightening stacks, sizing the clothing racks, etc.
I'd just finished the juniors department when I turn around and see so many clothes on the floor. There was a teenager picking up folded shirts to look at them and then she was just throwing them on the ground.
It was a particularly bad day for me as all but two of our truck team had called in. I didn't have time for this at all.
I politely asked her to stop throwing the merchandise on the floor. Its fine if she wanted to just set the stuff back onto the tables, but seriously stop throwing it on the ground.
This turned into her proceeding to throw piles of folded clothes on the ground. Picking up hanging items and just tossing them.
So I asked where her parents were. She refused to answer. So I paged overhead asking for the parent of said teen (I described her clothing and hair) to come to the juniors department, as their daughter had something amazing surprise for them.
It wasn't long before a lady walked over with a smile on her face, and then it just fell into the most pissed off/disappointed/disgusted look. She looked at me, then her daughter. The girl tried to say I was the one that did this and was trying to blame her for being bad at my job. Her mom was having NONE of that.
Mom apologized profusely for her daughter's behavior and asked me to show her how we folded the clothes. I tried to tell her not to worry about it, I just wanted her kid to stop. She insisted, so I showed her the fold we used on shirts and the ones we used on pants.
I started picking things up, and noticed that the mom had gone to work telling her daughter how to fold everything. Eventually she told me I could go do something else, they weren't leaving until her daughter fixed everything.
I had other things to do, but I came back later and they were finishing up. Daughter was in tears, saying she was humiliated and that this wasn't her job. Mom just kind of stood there chuckling and said, "it's your job right now, you make a mess you pick it up. Rules don't stop at our front door, they apply to anywhere you go."
Started off as one of the worst experiences but ended on a high note, for me at least.
I worked at Target in the clothing department for about 3 years. One night I was on the closing shift (6pm-11pm). If you work the closing shift, you spend pretty much the entire shift zoning your assigned area. For me, that meant folding clothes for 5 hours. This particular night I was assigned the women's area, which is the largest. Around 8pm a woman, probably in her late 40s, approached me.
She asked if I could help her find maxi skirts. I happily walked her to where they were. She then asks my opinion on which skirts I liked the best. Again, I happily told her. She grabs every single print we offer in the skirt. Then she asks me to come back to the fitting room with her. I obliged.
When we get back to the fitting room she wants me to stand outside the dressing room as she tries the skirts on. She comes out after each one and spends about 5 minutes going back and forth on "does this look good?" "Is it the right size?" "I don't like it." "Actually I do like it."
She asked me to fetch different sizes for different prints. She also has an attitude while she's doing all of this. Telling me that it's my job to help her. This went on until about 9:30. Finally, I think she's done. She now has about 20-25 skirts in her dressing room. She leaves them all sprawled out in the room and proceeds to tell me that she doesn't want any of them. Then she tells me to have a good night and leaves, leaving her mess behind. It took everything in me to smile back and to say have a good night as well.
Also, about 2 years later, my cousin was working at an office and some lady came in there. When my cousin was telling me about the lady and how she was a pain who kept going back and forth on things and was being so rude... We discovered it was the same lady I had helped before. So apparently this is the norm for her.
The End Of My Career
This crazy woman was already a known problem customer in our store. Being one of the managers and a longtime retail veteran, I usually helped her when she came in.
One particular day, she came in wanting to return a clearance item she'd bought 3 MONTHS AGO. I knew she knew our return policy and pointed out the "Final Sale" note on her crumpled receipt. (The day she'd bought the item in question had not been a fun encounter to begin with).
She started screaming that she should be allowed to return it because she has cancer and I have no idea how hard that was. I nursed my grandfather through Stage 4 lung cancer so had some idea but simply gave her calm reassurances. I did stick to the policy though. Side note: she'd been a nightmare long before she became ill and probably should have been banned already for some of her antics.
After more back and forth, she asks that I let her just exchange it. As she's giving me a headache, I agree, inform her that the exchanged item WOULD NOT be able to be returned or exchanged and reminded her of how much credit she had.
She comes back with another item and slams it onto my counter. Lo and behold, there's a dollar and change difference between her original item and the new one. She's furious, shouting that she shouldn't have to pay it and don't I know she's suffering! I firmly insist she coughs up the difference as THAT'S HOW EXCHANGES WORK.
She responded by pulling a fistful of change out of her purse and throwing it at my face. A nickel bounced off of my glasses. I saw red but calmly counted up the change, slid the excess across the counter (which she threw onto the floor) and she stormed out.
There had been a young couple in line behind her who promptly approached the counter and asked if I was okay. The head manager took over the register and sent me to the back to calm down. When I came out, she told me that the crazy woman had caused a ruckus at our sister store a few doors down and was now, finally, banned from both stores.
I quit the store and took a job in an office a few weeks later.
Physics Be Damned
Guy slammed a hot water bottle down on the counter and loudly exclaimed, with wife nodding in agreement behind him, that he'd put cold water in it 3 hours ago and it still wasn't hot.
That's Probably Worse
Idk if this counts as retail, but I was an intern at an aquarium, and while working at the touch-tank, a kid swallowed a handful of sand, I told his mother, and she told me that he was only four. He proceeded to swallow another handful of sand.
When Stubbornness Defies Science
Had a woman come in and request a large drink in a small cup. I asked her to repeat that. She reiterated she wanted a large drink, but in a small cup. I told her that wasn't possible. This went on and on, her yelling that it wasn't that difficult to understand, I'm trying to tell her that they're different volumes. Eventually I filled up a large, got a small cup and dead-eyed her while pouring the large in until it overflowed and went all over the counter.
How Does Capitalism Do This To People?
Former Blockbuster employee here.
There was a woman who not only absolutely refused to pay her late fees (which were legitimate), she became so enraged that she threw her stack of tapes at me, hitting me in the face. She then marched around the store and knocked every cassette, DVD, and coverbox that she could reach off of the shelves (some with her hands, some by swinging her purse), while shouting obscenities.
My manager got on the phone and called the police. When Angry Lady finished trashing the store, she demanded to know which cars out on the parking lot my coworker and I drove. When we refused to say, she spit at us and knocked all of the candy/shelf talkers/etc. off of the counters, and began stomping on them.
I don't know if it was divine intervention, or luck, or what, but as Angry Lady was spitting and stomping on the candy, another woman walked into the store. This woman just happened to be my next-door neighbor...and a police officer.
Officer Neighbor Lady approached Angry Lady and identified herself as a police officer. As she attempted to ask what the problem was, Angry Lady shouted, "WHERE'S YOUR F*****N' BADGE, B***?!", spit at Officer Neighbor Lady, and attempted to flee.
Officer Neighbor Lady grabbed Angry Lady before she could reach the door and a scuffle ensued. In a blink, Officer Neighbor Lady kicked Angry Lady's legs out from under her and she went down like a sack of bricks. I'll never forget the SMACK sound her face made when it hit the concrete floor (satisfying!).
While she held Angry Lady down, Officer Neighbor Lady asked me to go get her purse, out of which she pulled a pair of handcuffs. As the cuffs locked around her wrists, it was then that Angry Lady finally realized what trouble she was in. She began to sob and wail loudly. She promised to make nice, pay her fee, and begged to be let go. Two uniformed officers arrived and hauled Angry Lady away, screaming and crying like a lunatic.
Turned out Angry Lady was actually the mother of a student at my school (I was in high school at the time). He avoided me for the rest of the year (felt terrible for the guy). We found out later that Angry Lady was not under the influence of any alcohol or drugs - she was just a volatile, childish jerk. She was banned from every corporate Blockbuster store.
Oh, and the late fee she owed? $12.
Hot Coffee Drama
When I was a kid, I worked at a fast food restaurant and opened on the weekends. Toward the end of the breakfast rush, some guy comes through with a huge order. We were getting ready for lunch, and didn't have anything he wanted already made, so it took us a few minutes to get it together.
He starts cussing at me that he is late for church, and I need to hurry the hell up. I explain that I will get his food out as soon as the cooks are done, but that's not good enough for him. I finally reached my limit, and told him he should probably leave the house earlier next Sunday.
Dude throws hot coffee on me through the drive-thru window. My manager sees this, and asks me how much their food is. He then pulls that amount out of the register, throws it at the man, and tells him to get the heck out of his drive-thru. The guy threatens to call the cops, and my boss told him they were already on the way and he needed to leave if he didn't want to get arrested for assault.
"Uhh, why this model of shoes has seams on the right, and that one has on the left?" Dude, are you serious? I sell, not design this stuff!
"The mother bought..."
I've had this one mother of a few teenagers tell me verbatim,
"You know if you slowed down, we wouldn't run into this situation."
Story behind it: The mother bought a whole lot of stuff, including some taquitos and a slushie. One of her kids come in and drop their stuff on the counter so I added them and the mom asks "Did you include this?" in a mean manner. While the kid says I'm paying for myself so I void the things the kid put down with the mom still asking and I go "No" and she tells me that quote.
"On one particular Thursday..."
I work at a Starbucks, and you can imagine all of the customers we get. Especially being the only location in my city with a drive thru. But there was one lady who stood out among everyone.
Every Thursday is happy hour, which is a buy one get one for hand crafted espresso beverages, so lattes, Frappuccinos, anything we have to pour out blood, sweat, and annoyance into.
On one particular Thursday we were extremely busy, and one lady came in and decided to order 8 different frappuccinos. All fairly complex; 4 different types of milk, all with more than one syrup and some unusual "secret menu" item that made the print out sticker about half a foot long.
Anyway, there were only two of us making beverages, I was doing cafe orders and my coworker was making drive thru orders, so I got flooded with frappes.
I had already heard this lady chew out my coworker on the POS for not making half of her order free, so I could tell she was a total Karen. But about 2 drinks in she yells at me asking what's taking so long, why I'm purposely working so slow to ruin her day, etc.
I politely explained to her that we only have one blender at the moment so it takes some time to make the drinks, (our other one had been broken because the motor wasn't working properly). She accused me of being extremely rude to her and asked to speak to my manager, and considering they weren't in at the time I asked one of my supervisors to come out.
This lady exclaimed that I had called her a btch, told her to sit the fck down and wait for her damn drinks, and some other bullshit she made up on the spot.
Right then, I used my right to refuse service to anyone, and dumped her three finished frappuccinos down the sink while looking her dead in the eyes. My supervisor backed me up, saying that if she was going to act this way, she would have to leave.
She walked out so fast, without even getting a refund, and I haven't seen her since.
The highlight of that day was getting a 20 dollar tip from an older gentleman which he had given to me as somewhat of a pat on the back for having to deal with that lady, and everyone in the store politely waited for their drinks and thanked everyone in the store.
"I told him what he needed..."
A customer asked me about our coupon. I told him what he needed to know. He asked again and I told him. This went on for a couple minutes before I called up the assistant manager, knowing if my patience was tried any longer I was gonna go off.
"I was a salesman..."
I was a salesman at cell phone store until two years ago, had a guy come in one night about 30 minutes before the store closed. I was the only one working at the time. He wanted to return a phone he had bought because he couldn't get used to the operating system, it was an iPhone and before that he had only used android. Nothing wrong with that, people have their preferences, I myself prefer android, to each his/her/their own. I check the gentleman's receipt and he is within the return period.
I look through the bag and see that the box the phone came in is still neat and tidy and has the charger, headphones, and warranty papers all where they should be. All seems to he om order. Finally I inspected the phone itself. The front looks okay, just heavily fingerprinted. I take the case off and I turn the phone over to look at the back and this thing is massacred. The back is scratched to hell and back. It looked like someone took a weed whacker to it. The glass lens on the camera was smashed. As I'm staring it open mouthed and wide eyed I glance up at the guy and he is just staring me down and then says, "the refund will go back to my card correct?" I took a second to answer because I couldn't understand the stupidity.
I finally said, "Sir, I can't take this back. Not at all. Our policy states that any return or exchange must be in 'like new' condition in order to be resold, albeit in 'open box' condition and with the extensive damage on the back, I cannot return it."
What ensued next was the most idiotic I ever seen a person act.
He said, "There's nothing wrong it. I don't see anything."
HOW DO YOU NOT SEE ANYTHING WRONG?
I looked at him dumbfounded and said, "The phone is right here between us, we are both looking at the same phone, look at the back plate and the camera."
He said, "It looks fine to me. Please refund my money, I don't want it."
"Well, as I said, I cannot take it back. I will not take it back."
"You have to, your policy says I can return or exchange purchases within 30 days and I'm within the 30 days."
"Yes you are, but the phone us damaged."
"No it isn't, where do you get that from?"
"From the fact that it's scratched and the camera lens is destroyed."
"I want to take to corporate."
" Alright, here is their number," I say as I had him a card with the number for customer service.
As he talked to them I went about the store finishing up my closing duties. He put the phone on speaker so I could hear the entire conversation. They told him the same things I told him and also told him that regardless they had no power to compel me to take a phone back. After a while he hing up on then and then sat at my desk staring me down until I can back over to finish the cash reporting at my register.
He looked at me and then said, "So when will I have my money back?"
"I am not returning that phone. Not a chance. You have been arguing with me for 30 minutes now, it is past 9:00pm, my store is now closed. The manager will be here tomorrow if you'd like to talk with him, but as of tonight I cannot and will not return that phone."
At this point his entire demeanor changed. Before he had just been a moron but had been calm. Now he lowered his head slightly and creased his brown and yelled, you f------ piece of scum. That's what you are. You are scum. Absolute filth. Worthless."
I'm not having this so I simply told him, "Gather your things and get out of my store. I will not be spoken to like that."
"No, I'm not leaving until you take this phone back, refund me, and reactivate my old phone."
"You need to leave. This is not public property. If you don't I am calling the police."
"You won't do it because you are spineless, scum."
So I called the police while staring him in the eye. He because even more furious and pushed my desk, not enough to damage it, just enough to nudge it slightly. At this point I realized that he may have weapon of some kind and me trying to stand my ground and be formidable with him may not be the smartest move, I went to the back of the store which is through a locked door and watched him through the security cameras to make sure he didn't trash the place or steal anything. When the police finally arrived I came out and told them the whole story to one officer while the angry man spoke to a separate officer.
The police finally told him that I was right, he needed to leave. The next day the manager called the guy and told him not to come in because he would not return the phone. I had taken pictures of it to show the manager. The man called relentlessly and tried to enter the store but we barred him from it. We eventually told him that if he kept it up that we would involve the police again and press charges this time. He eventually quit harassing us. The best part is the time in between his purchase and attempted return, remember I mentioned he was within his 3p day return period, he bought it two days before trying to return it.
Two days and he trashed the back. My theory is that he was fully aware of the damage and deliberately came so close to closing time thinking I wouldn't be as diligent because I wanted to leave for the night. As for why he wasn't seeking an exchange I am unsure, maybe he just came to conclusion that he didn't want a high phone bill, I have no idea. But those are my theories at least.
"So I ring her up..."
This happened today, a few hours ago.Not as crazy as the others, but I'm still pissed off.
This lady comes in with a return without a receipt. I ask to see her driver's license so I can scan it. So she opens her wallet and lays it on the counter in front of me and gives me an expectant look. I reach to pull her license out of the pocket (to scan it, like I told her, I thought it was pretty fucking obvious I couldn't do that when it's all covered up and I can't see the barcode on the back) and she pries my fingers off of her wallet and angrily says "Don't touch my wallet!" So I ask her to pull it out so I can scan it.
So I ring her up and give her a gift card with store credit. She gives me an angry look and leaves. Then, not a minute later, comes back to my register and demands to speak to a manager. All I can hear while I'm ringing up the next customer is this evil soccer mom loudly talking sh~t about me and everything I did wrong, then my manager has to break the rules and trade her gift card for cash just to get rid of her. I was trying to start up a conversation with the next customer so I didn't have to hear her being so horrible, but it didn't really work out.
"It's not that extreme..."
It's not that extreme, but I work at a Domino's and I have to listen to people asking me how many slices are in X size pizza. They're all cut the same. They all have 8 slices. Of course they aren't happy with that answer.
"She tried to start in on me..."
I managed a coffee shop in college that also had ice cream on one side. Shakes, sundaes, cones, etc...
Had a new girl working her first shift and this rude chick paused her annoyingly loud cell phone convo to berate this girl because she accidentally started to scoop the wrong ice cream. Honest mistake but this chick starts screaming at this poor girl and calling her all kinds of "idiot, dumb b!tch, etc...". The new girl was shaking and trying to apologize while fighting back tears. I walked over and whispered to her to go hang out in the office and that I'd take over. Then I slammed the door to the ice cream case closed and looked at the chick and told her "Get. The F*CK. Out" as calmly as I could.
She tried to start in on me but I just turned to the rest of the line and said "no one is getting ice cream until she's gone. So figure it out."
The rude chick bounced pretty quickly after that.
"I told the lady..."
Was a dog trainer at a pet store talking to a customer about training for their dog. She had her father with her and says something like 'don't worry I'll take care of it' and proceeded to hit the dog. I about lost my sh!t. I told the lady to never let her dad do that again. She was sad but I don't think it changed anything.
Also had someone bring in a litter of puppies that they were feeding fried chicken to. That was very very sad.
"I answered the customer service phone..."
I answered the customer service phone at a supermarket. A customer told me that our produce scales were wrong, because when he got home he checked the weights of all his fruits and vegetables on his kitchen scales and they were different from how the store weighed them. This was a HUGE and unacceptable act of fraud on the store's part, obviously. He had calculated the weight differences and demanded that I refund the amount he'd been "overcharged". The sum? $0.17c.
"I think I actually..."
I think I actually have one for this.
For some backstory, I work at a small store that has 3 locations, two in the city I live in and one an hour away. At the time this happened, I worked in all three locations throughout the week. This story takes place in the location an hour away, where I only worked on Mondays and Thursdays. The other employee worked the other days at this location, we will call her S. S often brought in her girlfriend to hang out, which was fine and our boss didn't care as long as work got done and customers were helped.
Supposedly S's girlfriend looked like me (I have seen her, the only similarity is that we are both blonde, and not even the same shade of blonde). We also have a no refund or exchange policy, as people are a--holes and have abused it in the past, so before I even started working there my boss decided to do no refunds and no exchanges for any reason. This policy is posted at the cash register, on the wall, on the window next to the door, and on one of the counters (this is a very small store, so frankly the amount of places is excessive). It is also posted at the bottom of all receipts.
Okay, so the story. I'm working one Monday and this old couple come in with one of our store bags, so I already know it's going to be a rough visit. They ask for a refund for an OPEN product. That they ADMIT to using. The product helps with pain relief, but there isn't a set amount for everyone. So some people may need one teaspoon, some people may need a tablespoon, some may need multiple tablespoons. Anyways, of course, I tell them no, because of store policy. At this point, they have already mentioned 3 times that I was "here yesterday when it was sold", to which I repeatedly pointed out that, no, I was in another shop an hour away. After I tell them no, the conversation goes something like this:
Old lady: Well yesterday you said it was guaranteed to work, and it didn't work.
Me: Well, yesterday I was in other city at another shop, but we cannot guarantee results for anyone, we can just tell you what works best for most of our customers.
OL: Well he tried it and it didn't work. So you owe us our money back. That's what guarantee means.
M: As I previously said, due to store policy we cannot do refunds or exchanges. How much did he take of it?
OL: Two teaspoons.
M: Well, some people need more than others. We have some customers that take one teaspoon and it works fine, and others who take a couple tablespoons before it works. Everyone is dif-
OL: He tried multiple times. He took one teaspoon and waited 10 minutes and then took another and STILL NOTHING. I told you yesterday that if it didn't work I would be back in here today returning it and you said it was guaranteed to work. You knew I would be back if it didn't work.
M: Once again, I was nowhere near this shop yesterday. The only people who would have been here is S and her girlfriend, and I've heard several times that I look similar to her girlfriend. I don't see it, but since quite a few people do, I'll assume she was here yesterday. I was at our other location in other city, which is over an hour away. That's where I work every Sunday, like every Monday I work here. I do apologize if S told you you could have a refund, as she should never have said that and should not have guaranteed it's success, that isn't what we are supposed to say or do and I apologize on behalf of her. I'll be letting my boss know so he can speak to her about it. However, we do not issue refunds, and I cannot budge on that. (At this point she had tried to cut me off several times but I would slightly raise my voice and then go back to talking at a normal level.)
OL: Well you should really tell people there are no refunds.
(I pulled her receipt off the counter from where she put it and showed her the bottom, where it says no refunds)
M: It says it here at the bottom of the receipt, and there is a sign on the door, on the register, and on the wall. I do apologize if S did not verbally tell you there were no refunds, but that is policy.
OL: Well can't you call your boss?
M: I can, and I will if you would like, however he is going to say the same thing I did.
(I proceed to call my boss, who did indeed say the same thing I did. Only he basically told me I should know better than to call him about it, because I know the policy. The only reason he does this is that USUALLY it calms the customers down when they realize I'm getting in "trouble" for having him explain what I already did. I never actually get in trouble for it. The old lady also mentioned how I was the one who said it was guaranteed the day before, to which my boss responded "She was at other location in other city so there is no way that's true".)
They ended up spending another $100 on something else that they normally buy, vowing to never return again, to which I literally said "Okay." About a month after that S got fired for doing things like that, buying things from the store then selling them to people (we got a damn good discount, so she would buy something for like $8, then sell it to a customer in store for the store price of $22, getting cash for it. Which is basically stealing that money from the store.), constantly lying about me and saying I didn't do things I should have, or that I did do something I shouldn't (the bosses knew me well at that point, so they shut her down), and my personal favorite: harassing a regular customer, who then spotted my car one day and realized it was me working, and proceeded to tell me what had been going on. Safe to say, I was not sad to see S go, or the customer.
"I'm late to this..."
I'm late to this, but I used to manage a pop-up Halloween store in the city. For reasons far out of my control, and because of the nature of the temporary pop-up store, we had a step to come up into our store, so we were not ADA/wheelchair accessible.
One evening, a lady comes on a motorized wheelchair, and then gets upset that she can't come in. She wants to speak to me, the manager, to air her complaints. She was 100% in the right, and very reasonable.
All of a sudden this other able-bodied guy comes walking by and sees the problem. He starts yelling at me that I am treating this lady with a disability very wrong. He is just yelling and complaining and acting as this able-bodied hero for this woman.
There was nothing I could do at the moment, it was 9 PM, and I couldn't just start pouring concrete down to make a ramp into the store. This guy was having none of it. I was mostly upset that he was being belligerent for no reason, when I was having a perfectly fine discussion with the person who was in the wheelchair. I feel like sometimes people just want to start making a scene so they can be the hero.
Eventually, the guy walks away, and I continue on with the customer in a wheelchair who was very, very sweet. I saw her on a bus a few weeks later and we had a discussion like we were old friends.
Don't be the bigger guy in unneeded situations.
"They of course come back..."
Worked at a stand alone computer store in Baton Rouge about 20 years ago. I built custom computers. A man and his two young sons come in. None of them have sleeves on. And they all smell as though they have never even heard of deodorant or showers. Nice people, but you don't want to stand too close, because the smell is overwhelming. Literally. People are coming from the backrooms to see what in the world is going on. Owner is worried about a gas leak.
Anyway, they buy a desktop computer, and they ask how to set it up. I walk them through the whole process, and they're nodding all along. In the back of my mind I strongly suspect that they're not getting it, and that they'll only return later on, but in the moment I don't care. I just want to get through the pain as fast as possible to get some fresh air, and maybe someone else will help them when they come back...
Of course they return. And I could smell them before I saw them. Said the computer didn't work. I asked them to walk through the process that they went through setting it up. Blank look on their faces. So I ask what happens when they push the power button. Blank stares. Ah... So I show them the power button, and say that you need to push that to turn it on. (I AM NOT MAKING ANY OF THIS UP). Thankfully they leave after that, thinking that is that and I won't have to see them again. HA!
They of course come back a third time. Smell and all. This time they say that they did push the button, but nothing happened. I was surprised, because everything worked fine at the store. So I troubleshooting the problem, I asked if the green led on the power supply in the back of the case came on when they plugged the unit into the outlet at home. There was a pause for about 10 seconds before the man said "I didn't know we needed to plug it in. You never told us that!" He was mad, and I was glad that he was, because I got to turn it over to the owner (who ultimately accepted the return, which is probably the only time he did that, as these are custom computers). I suspect that this family didn't even have electricity...
"I was completely disgusted..."
I have sooo many stories but this one stands out cause it still pisses me off. A few years ago I worked for a cell phone store and one day this old guy comes in with his very nearly toothless friend. They needs a new phone but he doesn't pass the credit check, so he calls his wife to ask if she'll add him to her plan, to which she says yes.
I grab the phone he wants and begin the process of adding it to the plan and setting everything up. The WHOLE time, He is making googly eyes at me and flirting heavily while a friend is just sitting there giggling like Beavis. I'm remaining professional and ignoring the flirting, which consisted of compliments to my appearance, calling his wife an old ball & chain, asking me out to dinner, and telling me to make sure I put MY number in his new phone. Bear in mind this guy was at least twice my age and I was in my mid-30s at the time. To top it all off, he didn't even have enough money to pay so he calls his wife again and has her pay over the phone with her credit card.
I was completely disgusted, especially since I had just spoken to his very sweet wife and she clearly loved this creep and took care of him. I desperately wanted to kick him in his old balls but I just gave him b!tchface and clipped answers to everything he said and finished up as fast as I could. Thankfully we had people waiting to be helped, so I was able to shoo them out and move on but man, I was SO tempted to call his wife back and tell her exactly what kind of piece of shit she was married to. I wish I had.
Be it to a foreign country on the other side of the world, or merely a town a few miles north or south of you, there is always a slightly uneasy feeling of being in a new place.
Sometimes, however, you don't only suffer from homesickness upon arriving, but find yourself genuinely scared.
Perhaps you don't find yourself particularly welcome by the residents, or there are no people to be seen for miles around.
Either way, there are places all over the world where not long after arriving, the only thing on the minds of visitors was to get out of there as fast as they could.
Redditor 8-tentacles was curious to learn the places fellow Reddit users would never set foot in again under any circumstances, leading them to ask:
"What’s the scariest town/city you’ve been to, and why?"
"I ended up driving through this tiny town in the middle of Nevada that I assume used to be a mining town."
"It looked like a steady paycheck hadn't been seen in this town for 20 years, the houses were all dilapidated, and the locals looked just as worn out."
"Bullet holes and burn marks could be seen on pretty much every building."
"The only reason I drove through the town instead of just sticking to the main road was to top up on gas, but I couldn't find anything, not even a small convenience store."
"It must've been hell for those folks considering the closest town with an actual store and gas was around 70 miles away."
"I took a look via Google Earth, at some of the towns people mentioned and I found it!"
'Definitely not a place I'd want to go back to."
"Everyone talks about Gary, IN, but there is a town over the border in Illinois called Harvey, IL."
"I can't put my finger on exactly what makes it worse, but being there felt like I was on the moon."- theredditforwork
El Alto, Bolivia
"El Alto Bolivia."
"This was 15 years ago at least."
"It's above the habitable zone, and locals were openly fighting in the streets."
"Good times."- ooo-ooo-oooyea
Somewhere in New Mexico...
"I stopped at some gas station out in the middle of where-the-f*ck, New Mexico, only to pee."
"Parking lot not even completely paved.'
"My SO stayed behind in the car, and our son, so I have no corroborating witnesses, but this was the weirdest f*cking place of business I ever stepped into."
"Some David Lynch level sh*t."
"First of all, this place was huge for no obvious reason."
"As far as I know, there wasn't a town nearby."
"I mean, it was isolated out in the desert."
"When I entered, there was a store in there, like a convenience store."
"I passed through that, and entered a hallway."
"There was a restaurant in there, completely empty."
"I follow the signs to the restroom, and go down this hall."
"It already feels a little creepy to me, and horrifyingly enough, I am navigating to the bathroom by the sound of someone who seems to be puking violently far off down the corridor."
"I could hear this sound echoing down this crazy hallway."
"The hallway has a bend in it, and I'm starting to wonder how f*cking big is this place?"
"I turn the corner, and there is one of those claw grabby machines where you try to pick up stuffed animals and other cheap sh*t, standing in the hall."
"A group of young boys are there, crowded around the machine."
"When I come around the corner, they all look up at me wordlessly, with no trace of joy or excitement or pleasure."
"They just play the game with inscrutable faces, silently, like cats surrounding a mouse."
"The hall continues, and so do I."
"Where the g*ddamned f*ck is the toilet.'
"This hallway is disturbingly long and I've been driving for two and a half days."
"I like my bathrooms simple and direct."
"This does not seem to be either of those things."
"I finally locate the can way the hell down there around another unnecessary corner, and upon entering, I can no longer hear whoever was retching and choking."
"It is now silent, but for the stench so bad it was nearly foggy in there."
"Somebody's feet under the sh*tter door."
"I get out quick."
"Walk past those seemingly soulless and bored boys."
" Why the hell is this hallway even here?"
"There are no doors, no other businesses, these kids are creeping me out in the sinister way they stare blankly at me as I pass."
"I am at a loss to even explain why those kids are here, this place is isolated AF, the hall has too many dark corners and bends in it with no apparent logic."
"It feels like an anxiety dream, it feels like reality itself is being manipulated like the little crane arm claw the one boy is guiding."
"It feels like I want to get out of here, get back outside, get in the car and put this whole place in my rearview mirror."
"So I do."
"I get in the car."
"'Do you feel better now?'"
"'No. Actually I don't'."
"'You shoulda seen this place'."- Alternative-Amoeba20
"Johannesburg, I grew up in a pretty rough city and would say it doesn’t compare to there, you can feel how tense the air is and you really need to pay attention to everything at all times."- Much_Committee_9355
"No, it's not a story of how dangerous it is, or how cops tell you to run red lights ."
"That happens, but it's mostly myths that get perpetuated by people who never visited."
"Gary is just desolate."
"It's almost post apocalyptic."
"Nature has overtaken many areas, and many of the 'vacant' houses you see are actually lived in by homeless people."
"What makes it scary isn't that it has dangerous people, it's that it can be incredibly quiet for a populous city."
"The few times I've had to go through Gary or IN Gary for something, I've always seen something that has frightened me."
"Like people staring at me through half boarded windows, people crawling out of bushes to ask for money, or people just straight up walking in front of your car trying to get you to slow down or stop."
"It's one of the few places in America that actually feels heavy to be in."
"I swear TV shows and movies are missing out on some of the easiest post apocalyptic scenery that they have ever had."- NewAccount971
"My mom and most of her family is from there and the town is just so damn sketchy."
"People being shot the next street over seems like a daily thing."
"My crazy Great Grandma lived in a 4 story house by herself , house had been in the family for a while, and she never locked the doors, just slept with a 9mm next to her bed."- SidtheGoat87
It's sad to hear about these places, and the hard times they've fallen under.
One hopes they might find a way to bounce back one day, and make people excited to visit, rather than avoid them at all costs.
Listen ... we're just gonna be totally honest with you.
The answer is "not much" IF loved ones can come too.
Reddit user benharper09 asked
"Americans of Reddit: What would it take for you to consider moving to Europe to live and work there?"
We don't know if this Reddit user is, like, gathering market data or just really wants to know why Americans don't leave - but here's what Reddit had to say.
Whole Squad Comes With
"My wife and I have discussed moving out of the States, but family keeps us rooted. Maybe when the parents have passed."
"I used to live in Louisiana and it’s a damn nightmare there but when me and my wife found out we were pregnant in 2020 I decided that by 2022 I wouldn’t be in Louisiana anymore raising my child and we let all our family know. There’s still FaceTime and social media and mailing gifts and all that."
"If they want to see him or us in person then they can travel here but I wasn’t staying in hell so he can be near his family. It’ll be better for him to be somewhere that’s not as damn horrible. I literally had fear for my life from about age 10-33 when I moved. Nothing was gonna make me stay and raise my kid with that same fear."
"This is a big one. Our entire support system is either here in town or within 2 hours away."
A Jobhomer simpson job GIFGiphy
"Um, job opportunities? Europe doesn't let you just up and live there if you want to."
"Here in Austria we are currently looking for a large number of people willing to work. Austria has around 150.000 job openings that cannot be filled because there aren't enough people."
"I doubt Americans will fill many, particularly with professional jobs requiring a college degree, as salaries tend to be far high over here."
"There are obviously a few exceptions, but as a general rule I don’t see it happening."
"There are pretty significant differences in cost of living too though, as many European countries have healthcare, childcare, you can actually live in many European cities without owning a car which as I understand it is realistically impossible in the US. Looking at salary v. salary is too simplistic to really compare the buying power you're left with after taxes."
Are We Even Wanted?
"Do they even want us?"
"Not if you are old without money. Or young without skills."
"Yeah. We do. I would welcome Americans with open arms. Though I understand it's hard for most Americans to move to Europe."
"I mean maybe you personally be okay with Americans moving to your country but your immigration laws are not so amenable."
"It's not that Americans don't consider or want to move to Europe as this question implies, we want to but it's not easy to do legally."
"We are strongly considering making the move. My biggest concern is the language barrier. I know some people may speak English as a second language but I wouldn’t want to presume."
Pros Over Cons
"Consider yes. Actually moving to one of the many countries with their pros, cons, and immigration policies is a whole other matter. This kind of thing works best for people who are very young, very rich, or have an employer involved."
"Not Europe, but I looked into Canada for a while and the pros and cons ended up convincing me it wasn't worth it for my family."
"For the last few years this has been an annual discussion my wife and I have. The pros just don’t outweigh the cons yet. Burning a huge amount of money to move away from family and friends to be an outsider in a place where seasonal depression would crush me and cold weather issues would be detrimental to my wife’s health issue along with a lower paying job with fewer prospects for advancement in a place where the cost of living is so much more expensive…it always seems like a good idea until we list out all these things."
"That and Canada seems to be experiencing the same issues the US is - albeit on a much quieter level (which to some degree is often more concerning. Trucker convey tried to happen here and it got egged out of existence with them all fleeing. In Canada everyone stood around and just let it exist. For days. And days.) - which make me realize I might be better off staying put. It also seems wrong for me to be the one to up and move when I am white, straight, and in a decent financial position. My vote, my voice, my donations all make a difference for marginal groups that are fighting. We have a lot of friends in the LGBTQ community and being the ones that got to leave would just kind of haunt me."
Language Barrierseason 10 friends GIFGiphy
"Aside from everything everyone has said is language. I took Spanish for 6 years and maybe understand 10%. I took German for a year and can say hello. I did duelingo polish everyday for six months and got nowhere."
"I've accepted its damn near impossible for me to learn a language. I could sell my house to have the money. I could leave my family. But job stability and language...those are my 2 big problems."
"This is the big one for me. You could go to Germany, Denmark, Norway as a tourist and just speak English. But working a day-to-day job, going to the supermarket and all that, you really need to speak the language to be productive, no matter how patient your co-workers are. (I’m a software engineer)"
"I will say, being in the country helps immensely. I can't imagine trying to learn a language while sitting in the US."
Once You Understand, It Makes It Hard
"My family are immigrants to the US so know how hard it is to start somewhere new. Also a lot of my family is in the US and I don’t want to miss my nieces and nephews growing up"
"I am a UK person living in America (have been here ages) - I know my wife and children dont like the way america is shifting, and through citizenship of me and my children I could easily get everyone legally into the UK."
"But... would my (college age) kids want to go there? Would we be able to make friends as near-retirees? Would the (inferior) material standard of living be too much of an adjustment and we would be shivering through the winter wondering what we did?"
"The favorable exchange rate makes it tempting too... but the reality is I think there would be some big personal drawbacks for my family"
"Being able to guarantee my safety as a practicing Jew."
"I love Europe, have loved my time in Europe, but the track record on that score .....is not great."
"I feel the same way as a black woman. I'm used to and can often reconize/avoid most of the racism in the US. But it's an entirely different beast in other countries. At my age, I don't think I have it in me to navigate those complexities."
"I can understand this. The problem about saying “moving to Europe” is that Europe has so many different cultures and attitudes depending on where you go."
"Here in the UK, racism certainly still exists but as a mixed race person, I’ve only experienced racism towards myself a handful of times and I personally believe the UK has some really good attitudes to race, especially in London probably the most diverse place in the world"
MoneyThe Simpsons Money GIFGiphy
"And help with the paperwork and whatnot. It’s not easy to immigrate to Europe, they’re not really interested in you just arriving."
"It can be expensive, long and frustrating but I just did this with a big family and pets about a year ago."
"Particularly thankful today to be "somewhere else" with my teens and twenties daughters."
"All the help you need is on Reddit. Lots of helpful people and resources."
"You start at the beginning, and learn learn learn. Just like any other thing you want to know. People figure it all out every day, and I am confident you could, too!"
Marketable Skill Or Marriage
"I have no marketable skills that eu countries want. And most don’t accept a lot of what I can do for a work visa. So my best bet to immigrate is marriage."
"Same. No one in Europe wants me, so the answer to OP's question is, "it would take any counry in the EU wanting me."
"Came here to say this. From the research I've done, the desirable skills for most countries are stem/healthcare/etc. and while it makes sense why that is, not everyone can just up and make a career change to one of those fields."
"That can be expensive or daunting even if you're just doing it to change jobs and stay in the US."
"This. If it was easy/possible for most Americans to move to Europe a lot more of us would be leaving. Even if you ignore the legal hurdles, more than half of Americans can’t afford a $1000 emergency (the most relevant statistic I could find), and probably couldn’t afford to move states let alone continents."
"I'm married to an eu citizen. My kids are eu citizens. But I still can't get residency until I'm at least conversationally fluent in the language."
AS Long As There Is No Dragonsstop motion horror GIFGiphy
"The castles look nice, but the threat if dragons keep me away."
"That's not much of a problem in Europe, my hometown only got destroyed 5 times by a dragon in 30 years."
"Did the smith and the cobbler survive the dragon strike? Or did the plague do them in?"
"So you have 'dragon season' like we have Hurricane season and Tornado season. Got it."
"We have sorted that problem in Wales and advertise the fact on our flag."
"The dragons you see coming. It's the rats that get you"
You've seen what Reddit has to say, so now it's your turn at the mic.
Americans, what would it take for YOU to head across the pond to live in Europe?
Men have this reputation for being simple, straightforward creatures.
Nothing could be further from the truth. Humans in general are not simple, straightforward creatures, but men are just ... baffling.
At least as far as the women of Reddit are concerned.
Reddit user Theunknowndud asked:
"Women, what do you find the most confusing about men?"
These fine femmes saw an opportunity to vent and ask questions and they absolutely ran with it.
Here's what they most wanted to know about.
Not Going To The Doctorperry cox whatever GIFGiphy
"Why some men don’t go to the doctor or dentist, unless someone else makes the appointment for them."
"Because if someone else makes appointment for me I feel obligated to go. But I don't care about myself enough to make the appointment myself and I just learn to live with whatever the problem is."
"It's like reading my own mind."
"I go because I'm told it is medically necessary by my wife. Otherwise I've been conditioned to determine whether it is financially necessary. In other words, if I'm not missing work because of it, it isn't necessary."
"I can't speak for everyone, but that is what I grew up with and I can't just "break" it, so I really do rely on my wife to force the issue, otherwise the cost factor pretty much overrules everything."
"I hate making appointments unless absolutely necessary. I don’t feel like going to a doctor is a necessity unless I’m not feeling well (I know I’m an idiot). As far as the dentist goes my wife made the appointment once and ever since then the receptionist makes my next appointment."
"You can be completely oblivious to any mess in the house but can spot a wall has been brush painted in the wrong direction from 20ft away."
"Wall is permanent mess is temporary"
"I am a man. I don't know anything about painting so don't spot stuff like that but every time I visit someone I spot how they set up their router/WiFi and see why they might have problems with their WiFi connection as they just hide their stuff away instead of putting the box in a way the waves flow unobstructed. I work in IT."
"English is not my first language and I'm kinda tired but hope what I wrote makes sense."
"I learned some guys are like this because they were never raised to clean up after themselves. Their moms or caretakers always did the tidying for them, so they never learned to “see” mess and do anything about it."
"Compare this to something like wall painting which can be something that they spend a lot of time perfecting."
Breath, I Forgot To BreatheBreathe Schitts Creek GIF by CBCGiphy
"I'm a man. But something that confused my wife is when I suddenly take a deep breath for no reason. She's like 'are you ok? You sure? Anything you need to talk about? What's going on?' And I just say 'nah I'm fine, think I just forgot to breathe and catching up'."
"To be honest, I feel really blessed that I have someone who cares enough to ask if I'm OK. But yeh, seriously just forgot to breathe 😀"
"Dude it's so fukin true that i was taking a deep breath as i was reading ur comment."
"Are you ok? Anything you need to talk about?"
"My wife's biggest gripe is that I will spend time hiking / drinking / driving / whatever with friends I haven't seen in months, and when I get home I will have absolutely nothing to report back despite having talked solidly with them for six hours."
"My wife on the other hand will casually pass a friend in the street and within ten minutes knows what theyve done every day since they last spoke, the health and financial status of them and all other friends and relatives, and a forward facing calendar for the next three months."
"It’s funny though. All the bullsh*t we talk about as guys slowly leaks a bunch of personal information over time. You can tell that one guy isn’t happy with his relationship, one guy is broke, one guy hates his job, one guy has a medical issue. You know all of this without really talking about it just because you spend quality time with them. Yet even we can’t recount it directly, we just know it in the moment when we are with the boys."
"Damn you really hit the nail on the head there."
- User Deleted
Going Into Screensaver Modelooking homer simpson GIFGiphy
"I’ve learned a lot being married to my husband, but there’s one thing I fail to understand in general. Why do you guys like to stare out the window so often? It’s usually just going up to a window or looking out the front door, and you fall into a trance. What’s up with that?"
"I actually do this a lot."
"Also when I’m in the shower I will just stand and think."
"I’m usually thinking how to solve a problem that will probably never occur."
"Lol. I love it. It’s particularly amusing to me when I’ll realize the room has fallen silent and I look up and he’s just there. Staring. My dad did it too."
"It's a way to trick your brain to go idle long enough to enter screensaver."
Power Saving mode
"My gf is still baffled at the fact that I can just turn off my brain and not think of anything"
"There's a science museum where I live and there's a game you can play that uses brain waves. Basically it has a ball in the middle of the table that moves based on who has the least amount of brain activity at the time. And you want the ball to move away from you."
"You put on a head piece and when both players are ready, they touch the two pads on the table with you hands. I'm currently undefeated at a record of 14-0. Idk if I'm dumb or if I just shut everything off but life support lol"
"I found my husband on the couch in a dead silent house whistling tunelessly and playing bongos on his own tummy. When I asked what he's thinking about as he's doing that he says 'You know...nothin'. Like listening to the wind in your mind and sh*t. Everyone does it'."
"No Cowboy, we don't all do that. Y'all have some magic happening. Sounds nice."
One Of The Worlds Mysteries
"D*cks, the way they work is confusing. Like I’ve been told they only react when seeing or feeling something they like but I’ve also been told it will just decide to pop up randomly though the day with nothing."
"True, d*cks are doing what they want. Sometimes out of nowhere it just decides to stands up. Also, it can stand up when you're aroused (obviously) or when you're excited to see someone you haven't seen in a long time."
"Can confirm, i got a got a penis and im still confused how it works at times."
"Fun fact: The penis has pressure sensors, just touching it a bit or squeezing a bit can be enough to trigger an erection."
"Boners are strange. Morning wood is the result of overstimulation from a dream. We get nervous boners. We get sad boners. We get angry boners."
Forgive And Forgeti forgive you hug GIF by Kim's ConvenienceGiphy
"I find it confusing how men are so forgiving. It’s one of the things I adore the most about men and find the most baffling. I’m learning now that men will get over things like 40 minutes after they happen and genuinely get frustrated and sad when their girls hold grudges. I’ve found that the people I’ve had falling outs with and was able to rekindle my friendships with were mostly all men."
"I also find it weird how men will fight each other and then be best friends the next day."
"You get angry in the moment but then after you're removed from the situation you gotta let yourself cool off. Once you're thinking clearly you'll realize it wasn't that big a deal and get over it. Usually the start of a fight isn't that big it's the stuff that comes after that escalates it so you just recognize that both of you just human and do and say dumb things when your blood is up. Also I think women tend to plan more and then act and men will just act and plan on the fly so that leads to women believing slights or f**k ups are more intentional whereas men will just think of them as mistakes and forgive them."
"Coincidentally, just yesterday I was reminiscing on a friend and me getting into a fight. I hit him over the head with a glass bottle and he gave me a really clean two-piece in response."
"I laughed for a few minutes at how inconsequential that fight was after the fact, but how extreme it was looking back on it. We’re still thick as thieves to this day, lol"
"As a guy I feel we are a bit more black and white about forgiveness. I can easily forgive and forget most low-level things given time but I still have some grudges from over 10 years ago. I will likely never forgive them."
"Basically men work like traffic tickets. Small things are forgiven quickly. Bigger things take time. Some things are permanent."
"Some women feel more like an actual criminal record that never gets expunged."
"If someone is kind/self-aware/brave enough to apologize after they screw up, then it becomes easy to accept an apology from someone who understands they did something wrong and wishes that they hadn’t. Everyone makes mistakes, especially men, so forgiving and moving on is much more sensible than holding a grudge"
I Am OkayAnimated GIFGiphy
"When guys are seriously injured but act like its just a scratch… that they can somehow walk it off. All the guys I know are like this."
"A serious answer is because we don't want to panic and cause an issue"
"This is it right here. As soon as a calm guy starts panicking, everyone is panicking."
"Reminds me of when I accidentally cut a chunk of my finger so deeply that it hung off and you could see white underneath. I was internally freaking out and didn't even want to look at it, but did so I could assess the damage. I calmly asked my partner to bring me some bandages and alcohol and when I turned to look at her, she was pale and her lips were turning blue. She said 'Okay, but I need to sit down for a sec...'."
"I ended up walking all the way to the first aid box on the bottom floor of our apartment building while holding a cup under my finger to catch all the blood. I wasn't gonna try and walk it off, but I absolutely knew I couldn't panic for her and my sake!"
"TLDR: Someone will have to fix it, and panicking makes problems harder to fix."
"Exactly. Panicking doesn't help the situation. A clear head and talking to people on how to help solves way more."
They Jiggle Jiggle...
"How their crotch doesn't hurt when they run or go up the stairs. Like, even with underwear, you just have stuff hanging down there. I don't even have a large chest and it hurts to run regardless if I'm wearing a bra or not"
"I gotta tell you, the penis doesn't weigh much."
"A boob weighs more, and you ladies have two of them."
"One testicle also hangs lower than the other for the specific purpose of not getting crushed when walking."
"I'm a guy and I didn't know this, lol. Neat."
"Our stuff is not as heavy as yours, so we don't feel the dangling effect much. Also, sometimes it hurts when we wear very tight/ short undies"
"A couple things: Breasts are considerably larger and heavier than testicles, so they bounce a lot more. I jump up and down a few times when I get out of the shower, so my towel doesn’t have to soak up quite so much water, and I do support my balls while I’m jumping. That was a mistake I made exactly once. But if you’re wearing briefs, and the bouncing isn’t as much, it’s not really an issue."
"You’ve had your breasts since puberty. We’ve had our penis since birth. We had to learn to walk with it. You had a decade to get used to walking a certain way before your build changed dramatically. We’ve had essentially the same hardware our entire lives."
... at this point I might be more confused than I was going into this article.
We've got mess-blind people, refusal to acknowledge injury as if denial is somehow a healing agent ... and a dude who forgets to breathe.
The land Down Under is one of the most highly anticipated travel destinations for tourists around the world. Australia has fascinating history, beautiful sights, great food, cool wildlife, and some pretty cool people.
But as with any travel destination, there's bound to be a certain degree of culture shock. Have a seat and listen up, because you're in for some surprises.
Australians shared some information with us after Redditor emchmu123 asked the online community,
"Australians of Reddit, what is something that the rest of the world would be surprised or shocked to hear about the country?"
"There are more wild camels..."
"There are more wild camels in Australia than the Middle East."
At some point, the British were just like, what other animals can we introduce to this place? And then they just did it.
"You can drive for 26 hours straight and still be in the same state. It's kinda unsettling, especially those really tiny mining towns that have like a gas station and just flat dryland for as far as you can see."
It's kind of crazy how desolate so much of the country is. You don't just go to the Outback, you prepare to go there.
"In some parts..."
"In some parts of the country you are closer to space than the nearest town."
That's another way to hammer this point home.
"While I was working..."
"While I was working in Whistler people were often shocked to hear we have ski resorts in Australia."
Wow, you guys have everything.
Why do you get all the good stuff?! What about the rest of us?!
"I've never had..."
"I’ve never had shrimp on the barbie - ever!"
Can you even call yourself Australian at this point? How can we possibly process this information as the ignorant tourists that we are?
"Every spring, Magpies take to swooping people who come near their nests. Not a secret really, but I don't know how widely known it is."
I love magpies. They are the mascot of chaos and destruction.
"That there are..."
"That there are vast areas of rainforest as well as the better-known desert areas."
And it's beautiful! You forgot to mention that it's incredibly beautiful.
"The last confirmed death..."
"Almost no one here dies to spiders or snakes. The last confirmed death from a spider bite was in 1979."
This is exactly the kind of propaganda a deadly Australian spider would spread.
"It was a conservative government..."
"It was a conservative government that introduced gun control laws."
A nice fact to whip out at dinner parties the next time someone says that only liberals are for reform.
"You're supposed to eat Vegemite toast with butter. Not just a thick slather of Vegemite like Nutella."
"You're supposed to eat Vegemite toast..."
Hang on a second!
They've certainly not told us everything, but take heed, fellow traveler, and report back. Australia is a hell of a place and you'll have plenty of stories to tell when you come back!