Red Flags Women Cannot Ignore In Men
Looking for love is not easy.
In fact, with each passing day, it seems more and more impossible.
That's when people start to get lazy.
They start to consider just anybody.
Don't drop your guard.
If he seems like a roach.
He's a roach.
And not a hot Jeff Goldblum from "The Fly."
Signs, red flags, gut instincts... they are gifts when it comes to sizing up men.
Don't ignore the signs ladies!
Redditor teckk2003 wanted to discuss the things that women really need to pay attention to when deciding about a guy.
So they asked:
"Ladies on reddit what are red flags you can't ignore in Men?"
I always get weary around someone who can't not talk about themselves. Big flag.
I'm BetterChelsea Peretti Eye Roll GIF by Brooklyn Nine-NineGiphy
"When they have to always, always, always one up you."
"Ah I see you’ve met my father."
"Guys that constantly speak over people in conversation. They tend to not be very caring or respectful of others."
"That's my husband (soon to be ex... again). My friend was over the other day to talk about her breakup with her ex girlfriend, and he kept interrupting her, talking over her, trying to give her advice etc. She was clearly frustrated so I walked her back to her house to actually talk about it."
"When I worked at KFC, there was a girl whose boyfriend would stay parked outside the door the during her entire shift. That is not something I've seen commonly and it's a HUGE red flag."
"That happened with a girl I worked with as well. She worked 12 hour shifts and he would sit outside looking in at her for the 12 hours. Then sometimes he'd come in like a sad puppy talking to her. Genuinely pathetic and psycho."
Just Say It...
"Always making excuses rather than just saying ‘I f**ked up. What can I do to rectify this situation? What do you need right now.'"
"I made the mistake of not running the first time my ex wouldn’t apologize for something major. Now I’m in trauma from not only his affair but his inability to just own his sh*t and apologise. I will never let this one slide ever again should I choose to date again."
ListenWill Smith Smh GIF by The Academy AwardsGiphy
"Ignorant arrogance - doesn’t seem capable of changing his mind or seeing other perspectives."
Ignorance is not only a red flag, it's horrifying life trait.
Crazy!Seth Meyers Lol GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy
"When every single ex they have was 'crazy.' Err."
"I tried to explain to a friend once that maybe all of his ex’s weren’t crazy and he ended up getting blackout drunk and tried to fight me."
“she’s gone again"
"Unhealthy dependency on my replies. Before I met my current SO, I was chatting to a guy who needed replies within minutes. If I didn’t reply in 30 minutes he’d start saying things like 'she’s gone again.' Or 'and I’ve lost her interest again.' It became like a chore to respond. When I said I didn’t feel comfortable continuing the conversation he started talking about 'How women never gave him a chance, and he is a good man.'"
"It might not seem to him he had ill intent but it came across as controlling and pressuring. I had to block him eventually as he kept on messaging even though I had requested to stop the communication. Later he started sending paid likes on a dating platform to get my attention."
"When they cannot discuss sexual health like an adult. If you're having sex you need to discuss birth control, condoms, and STDs."
"Recently had std talk with 48M, he tells me he’s never been tested for anything. Says he’s just choosy about who he sleeps with so he knows he’s never had anything because he would be able to tell if his partners had an STD. This from a sexually active man that doesn’t use condoms often. I was stunned that anyone could still be this ignorant."
He was 26...
"Easily lost patience and out of control temper over minor things. I dated a guy once who had an argument over the phone with a family member, after he got off the phone he picked up a picture frame that was nearby and just smashed it onto the ground, sending glass everywhere."
"The argument was something to do with a book. We had been dating for maybe 2 months. He was 26. MASSIVE red flag that one is was."
HopelessBenedict Cumberbatch Drinking GIFGiphy
"Weaponized incompetence. Making no attempt at doing something effectively in the hopes that they won't be asked to do it again. If you can't put in the effort, then neither can I."
I hope everyone is listening.
Do you have any major red flags to throw down on the dating field? Let us know in the comments below.
We've all found ourselves annoyed by the ticks or habits of others.
Some of these are fairly common, such as chewing with your mouth open, cracking your knuckles, or whether or not they pronounce the "T" in often.
Some habits are a bit more unusual, though.
Only the people guilty of possessing these habits might not realize that they're unusual until they are told by someone else that practically no one, or literally no one, else does them.
It's an eye-opening, sometimes humiliating discovery.
"What made you realize that something you always did wasn't normal?"
Undiagnosed Medical Condition
"'You know that high pitch sound everyone always hears? Wait... you don't?'"
"Apparently, I have tinnitus."- FarAmphibian4236
Hard To Imagine It Never Occurred To Them...
"When I was very young I thought it was normal to have blood on the toilet paper after pooping."
"Turns out it was hemorrhoids, apparently I have always had them."
"My mom is a yawn-yeller."
"When she yawns, you can hear it from anywhere in the house."
"One time my sister had a friend over, and we were in the basement'."
"My mom yawned upstairs, and my sister's friend asked 'was that a coyote?'"- ViolaWPeytonsam winchester yawn GIFGiphy
Sweet Or Disturbing?
"When I first started dating my now husband, ever time we kissed he made a 'muah' kiss sound with his voice."
"Like he literally said 'muah' every time we kissed."
"I asked him why and he said he thought everyone did that because his mom did it growing up."- thti87
Unusual, But Pretty Cool...
"As a kid I would read a street sign as we drove past and I would then make as many possible words out of the letters in that sign."
"Stop, top, tops, sop, pot, pots, to, so, post, etc."
"I told my sister one day that I couldn't come up with any more words to make with some sign and she made fun of me the rest of the way home."
'I quit after that. I'm still a pretty mean Boggle player though."- Limited_turkey
Whatever Helps You Sleep...
"Pre Bedtime cereal, I had a sleepover when I was a kid and was confused when we skipped bedtime cereal."- Mre64Old Man Reaction GIF by LaffGiphy
There Are Worse Offenses
"I thought eating cereal without milk was normal until I went to summer camp and everyone stared at me like I killed the camp counselor."- spoilerdudegetrekt
It's Only Polite
"For me it was something I never did. In my twenties, I realized you're meant to make eye-contact when talking to people (I was feral)."- wys15wyg
Who Hasn't At Least Once...
"I got stopped by a cop once because I was talking to myself."
'I literally thought everyone just mumbled out their thoughts out loud."- azuresegugioTalk Talking To Yourself GIF by The ChallengeGiphy
Unlikely Source of Inspiration
'I'm an artist."
"I got asked one time why I draw hands looking 'like that' with all the fingers bent backwards.'
So I held up my hand in the same position as the one I just drew and it looked the same.'
"And that's how I found out I had EDS."- koinadian
The Bradys Can Certainly Relate
'Grew up in a house where seven people all shared one bathroom."
"Thought it was normal to get in the shower without waiting for the water to warm up."
"Everyone go fast before the water gets cold."
"Always wanted to try and be one of the first in line for the shower."- littleflower0929
"I was diagnosed with Arnold Chiari Malformation, which I like to say means my brain is too big."
"My wife says I have a misshapen skull...whatever...the bottom line is that my brain stem is excessively squeezed where it exits the skull through the hole on the bottom."
"I have a very minor case, but it causes randomly occurring neurologic issues."
"Upon learning of this diagnosis, my wife was reading up on the symptoms...many of which I knew were abnormalities."
"I was worried I had ALS because that is neurological."
"After reading a bit, she says, 'Do you have problems sneezing?'"
"I say, 'No, I sneeze all the time'."
"I mean, about every 4th or 5th sneeze, my vision goes white and I get dizzy and lose my balance, but I catch myself before I fall'."
"Sometimes I feel like I'm going to pass out, but I never have'."
"The look on her face was one of pure shock - wide eyes and mouth open'."
"Then I said, 'Now that I say that out loud, that probably isn't normal, is it?'"
"She responded with an emphatic, 'No it's not normal!'"
"It was normal for me because it has been that way for my entire life, so I never thought to mention it.."
"And no one had ever asked me what it felt like when I sneezed."
"And why would they?"
"Everybody sneezes, so everybody knows what it feels like."- TroubledWaterBridgesnow white and the seven dwarfs sneezing GIF by DisneyGiphy
"The first time I was staying at a friends house when I was in middle school I kept waiting for his parents to start fighting."
"His dad came home, food wasn't done yet, I was waiting for that fight."
'The Youngest brother didn't do his chores."
"I kept waiting for the screaming to start, I had braced myself for it, and it never happened."
"That's when I started realizing that parents aren't supposed to fight every night and drag their kids into it."
"Every day I got off the bus and would have to mentally brace myself before walking through the front door."
"Hoping my mom wouldn't find some random reason to shout at me for 3 hours."
"FYI I'm pretty good now."
"Moved out immediately when I was 18 and lived with a different friend."
"It's been 10ish years now."- Wesley_Otsdarva
If the worst thing you might be doing is getting on someone else's nerves, it doesn't really matter whether or not what you're doing is "normal."
But if you're worried something might not be normal about your health, probably best to call your doctor immediately.
My entire childhood was comprised of watching Hollywood movies about high school.
From High School Musical, I learned that theater is uncool and no jock would be caught dead in a musical. The Breakfast Club made me think Saturday detention wasn't so bad. I learned that teachers can be manipulated from Clueless, and Mean Girls showed me how divided high school kids are based on their cliques.
When I actually started high school, none of those lessons helped me. I knew several jocks who were talented musicians and starred in every musical. I never had Saturday detention, but I heard enough horror stories to know it was awful. Teachers are not fools who bend to a student's will, and cliques are almost a myth. Yes, the cheerleaders hang out with other cheerleaders, but they don't dump food all over the honors kids.
Very few high school movies reflect the actual high school experience. Redditors know this all to well and were ready to share their stories.
It all started when Redditor Many-Guide-8986 asked:
“Americans, how true are ‘American high school movies’ compared to real life high school?”
"Different enough to warp the expectations of certain people. Someone upthread said that movies are designed by Hollywood execs to fill story niches and archetypes, which is pretty accurate. We're watching a story that has to be carefully crafted to fill the expectations of all the audience members, and the audience expects Reese Witherspoon as prom queen, Bill Gates as captain of the chess team, Jack Black's the clown, and Brad Pitt's the quarterback...even though that doesn't actually happen."
"There's more truth in Napoleon Dynamite than there is in Bring It On or Mean Girls."
Party In The Parking Lot
"Most high school students don’t arrive to school early enough to tailgate in the parking lot"
"most are also not in their mid 20's and driving BMW's and Range Rovers, etc."
Time To Talk
"A weird thing is how they seemingly show it as if kids just have time to talk and chat in the middle of the day in the hallway by their lockers when in reality you're booking it across the building because you have 5 minutes to go from the first floor, get to your locker on the second floor, and then run all the way across the 3rd floor to your 3rd period class."
"Also dunno about y'all but I got only 25 minutes for lunch in HS, so nobody was milling about during lunch either in the halls."
I Vant To Drink Your Blood
"there are way less vampires in real life high schools."
"i notice you didn't say none 👀"
"yeah with all the werewolfs they dont stand a chance"
Bullying Isn't Funny
"Speaking just for my school, not even close. Bullying is never as obvious as it is in movies (nobody dumps their tray on anyone or purposefully trips the new kid, actually most people are pretty friendly), most of the teachers and the principal are well- liked, there aren't well- defined cliques (nerdy group, jocks, cheerleaders, etc.) but there are large friend groups that intertwine and overlap and there is definitely drama. They do get active shooter drills and the amount of drugs/ smoking/ vaping right, though. Also, crazy, entitled parents."
"Edit: We don't go to school at 10 am, the sun is almost never up until after we arrive. And yes, we do get 2-3 hours of homework most days."
"I remember one time in school, I was walking down the hall with my books in my arms. A random bully ran down the hall and slapped them down, hard, sending all my stuff flying everywhere."
"In a movie, everyone would point and laugh. In movies, that sort of obvious bullying of a nerd would be treated as funny and normal."
"In reality, the other kids gasped, and a few random kids stopped and helped me gather up my things. I remember one girl saying, "That was so mean.""
On A Mission
"The fact that Superbad spent a whole movie trying to obtain alcohol is totally realistic. We absolutely had whole evening adventures trying to get booze. The Hawaii driver's license was definitely a thing in the mid 1990s. California IDs had holograms earlier and couldn't be faked anymore. Several people at school at fake Hawaii IDs back then. I'm sure one of the writers must be my age from CA."
"I watched this movie with an ex (South American), and he was confused because they all just bought booze from the tiendas when they were like 13."
The Most Important Meal Of The Day
"No family eats breakfast together before school/work."
"And nobody goes out for a big sit down breakfast before school, either."
"I remember laughing because The OC always showed the characters going out for a nice breakfast in a restaurant before class, as if teenagers get up that early."
"This always drives me nuts in tv & movies. I don’t know ANYONE whose mom makes a huge spread like that for breakfast every day. Pancakes? Sure - but just pancakes, not also fresh cut fruit and orange juice and toast and etc etc etc. No one sits down to a huge meal like that every morning."
"AND, it’s usually dark out when most people are leaving for school/work. Only in the summer is bright that early."
No One Is Just One Thing
"Friend groups are more porous than they make. For instance, there were football players that also acted in school plays, or wrestlers also in the math club."
"The bullying is less dramatic. Nobody is actually getting locked in a locker."
"We did actually use those red cups at parties that you always see in movies, my non-American friends were always shocked when I told them that."
"IRL there are far fewer 35 y.o. HS students."
In Awe Of No One
"No one cares that much about the "popular" group of students, most people just mind their own business if they aren't with their friends."
A Regular Hangout
"We had 2:30 in between class periods. We did not have time to lean against the lockers and talk. Sometimes it rains, sometimes it snows, sometimes the wind blows; we had to go to school then too."
"In the winter it was very cold, in the summer it was unbearably hot. I bet they've fixed that because the expensive electronics would cook themselves. A school didn't need anything like that when they built the building."
"Usually there was some construction crew outside banging and hammering on something. There was no restaurant that we all hung out in. We did mob a pizza place a few times after the dances."
"They got mad because their employees were too busy, they didn't make enough money off of us and because the old people buying expensive food couldn't get through us. We caused numerous major traffic jams because we kept crossing the street."
"The cops showed up to direct traffic. The pizza place complained. The police went to the school and they told our parents that we had to stop. They let kept the rec center open later for us instead. They actually did put on a really good after party for the middle school dances after that. They just herded us all into there and told us we'd need to go home if we left or we'd get into trouble."
"I’m gonna take a guess that people don’t settle disputes with dance-offs"
"well how disappointing"
"When I was back in high school, break dancing was undergoing a small come back before getting swallowed up by Capoeira becoming the hot new thing."
"I witnessed several dance-offs. Only one was about a date. Most were about who was "da'best.""
As a horrible dancer, I’m quite relieved we never did this!
I love money.
If I had an endless supply, I might throw it away with abandon.
But I am not blessed with that level of abundance.
Some people really take spending to an extreme.
To a point where maybe others should be in charge of their purse and wallet.
Redditor Shadowclook21 wanted to hear about the times we've seen people waste money on nonsense, so they asked:
"What is the dumbest thing you've seen someone spend their money on?"
I get we all like nice things, but we have to be smart with our coins.
Wake Up!Good Morning Time GIF by Berk's Beans CoffeeGiphy
"An alarm clock coffee machine. It was me."
When on FB
"My wife is in a lot of mom groups on Facebook. The amount of people who beg for help for their poor babies who won’t get any Christmas/birthday gifts who also show off brand new giant tattoos is amazing. She shows me every time she finds one of these people and it happens all the time. Usually multiple recent photos of them out drinking and partying as well."
"So yeah, there’s a lot of people out there who blow big money in tattoos and partying instead of setting aside a little bit of money for their kids."
"Knew a girl who would spend all her money on scratchers and drugs. She would constantly go on about how when she finally won big she was going to move and get clean.... He grandmother gave her a 20 - 30k inheritance. Nothing changed except how many scratchers she would buy. I saw her buy out whole rolls occasionally. She wised up with the last few thousand and put some advance rent on an apartment (was in a motel) and fixed her car. But that money was gone in less than 2 months."
"PSA: Accidental subscriptions. Remember, kids, if you sign up for a free trial, be prepared to cancel that s**t the second they allow you. Otherwise, they'll start charging automatically."
KaboomIm Ready Independence Day GIFGiphy
"My neighbors once spent all their money on a private firework show, then had to hide their cars from the repo man for months. No longer neighbors."
Neighbors are always going to neighbor.
Classicssia diplo GIF by LSDGiphy
"I bought a cassette tape two weeks ago. I don't even have a way to play cassettes but I still bought it."
"My Mum has spent $1000s on crystals and stones. She continues to, and gives them as gifts, I have no idea wtf to do with them so I put them in my plants pots then she gets upset for some reason. Send help please."
"Get her a rock tumbler and have her tumble her own and try to identify them. Cheaper in the long run. Makes for a more interesting hobby too, if she gets into it. It will get her out of the house and into nature. Crystals are everywhere, they literally litter the earth. A lot of ordinary-looking rocks turn out quite beautiful once they've been tumbled."
Just a Waste
"I dated a guy who would still use his debit card even when his account was over drafted because he didn’t realize he was charged overdraft fees for every transaction. I had to explain to him his single snickers bar or bag of chips or whatever from the vending machine was now costing him an extra $35. And he did this multiple times every single shift he worked."
5 More Minutes
"Gambling machines. I work in a bar room. People will play these machines for 12+ hours and never win. Then they Win $700 the next night and think they’re on top... it’s insane. They look like zombies sitting there in a trance. Once had to unplug the machine on a patron who would not leave for closing. Kept saying '5 more minutes.'"
"I worked with a guy who'd spend 200-300 bucks a week on OnlyFans. He'd brag about it, I guess he thought of he'd spent enough he might get lucky or something."
Why do some people spend with such abandon? It makes no sense to me, but it's not my money.
Have you ever witnessed someone blow a load of cash on something crazy? Let us know in the comments below.
What is wrong with people?
Have we lost all sense of decorum?
I get that people need to speak their minds, but there are some moments where silence is the better option.
When you're naked and intimate with someone, it's best to not be mean.
I would've thought that would be a given.
Unless they're mean or creepy than do what you must.
But when you're alone in bed with a partner, partners, whatever, can't we put our best foot forward?
Redditor bipolar_bear76765 wanted to hear about the worst things we've heard in an intimate situation, they asked:
"What’s the worst thing anyone has ever told you in bed?"
If I have nothing nice to say, I just leave.
Follow my lead.
Over ItStay Back Jimmy Fallon GIF by The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy FallonGiphy
"I'm not attracted to you anymore. It wasn't during sex but it was still in bed."
"I don't think you're sexy but you're really good for a cuddle."
"I know the first and I love cuddling."
"Even though I can see how this could’ve been hurtful, especially if you might’ve wanted to be considered more than 'cuddle material,' were you at least able to cuddle your way into self-soothing? Lol."
"Best vibes and hope you have fared well."
"I got called a mistake immediately after. I had feelings for her and had had these feelings for her for years."
"I thought we would never actually be anything. She was the high school crush that ended up moving away and lost all contact. Through some crazy weird circumstances we ran into each other years later. We had been flirting like crazy for weeks. She immediately cut all contact. Pain."
That was quick...
"That she had sex with a friend of mine like 20 minutes earlier."
"I had sex with someone last year who right after we finished proclaimed that she had a boyfriend. Fast forward a year and indeed, they're engaged and sh*t like that.. HOW THE F**!!"
"I had sex a few times with my housemate’s girlfriend. He was completely ok with it as they had an open relationship. She suggested it to me while the three of us were drinking together. He was fully supportive of it, I even took him aside when she went to the bathroom to make sure he wasn’t just saying it for her. It was a bit odd, but we all knew it was a no strings attached deal and it worked out fine in the long run."
Pardon Me?Nbc Idk GIF by Good GirlsGiphy
"You can use one of my boyfriend's condoms. They're in the drawer, but they're probably too big."
"A lot of dudes who wear a magnum have no business wearing a magnum."
Lord, I need a bleach bath.
Stop!Oh My God Wow GIF by The Roku ChannelGiphy
"Just lost my hair due to heath concerns, was pretty embarrassed about it."
"He looks down and goes, 'Can you stop? You look like a man from this angle.' Oof."
“'You make me feel dirty when you touch me.' Happened over 40 years ago and it still crawls under my skin."
“'Just hurry and finish.' Two or three minutes in, she said it with a look of pure disgust."
"We have herpes, now."
"I could be wrong, but in some places it’s a crime to knowingly infect someone. At least, I do know of civil cases where people were able to sue for damages when someone knowingly had sex with them without disclosing their STD status."
Well people really are the worst at times. Be sure to pick your bedfellows accordingly.
Do you have any experiences to share? Let us know in the comments below.