Professionals Confess Industry Secrets From Their Chosen Field
We've all heard some conspiracy theories about certain businesses, most of which are outrageously false.
That laundromats are simply a facade for shadier practices (including, not so ironically, money laundering) or that the Coca-Cola company invented "New Coke" with the express purpose of improving sales on original Coke.
But every now and then, we can't help but wonder what really goes on behind closed doors in certain professions.
And are eager to hear all the juicy tidbits from people working in that industry.
Redditor WoOoOoOoShHhHh opened the door for people from a wide range of professions to share some of their juiciest secrets, by asking:
"What’s an industry secret in the field you work in?"
Literal Money Grabbing Machines
"I design slot machines for casinos."
"Don’t play slots."- psychfan5
Speak When Spoken To!
"I'm an attorney."
"The secret is shut the f*ck up."- --IIII--------IIII--
They Are In Good Hands
"Managed boarding and grooming kennels for 8 years."
"The secret is that the employees actually do love your pets too."
"Even the difficult ones, most of us realize they just miss their people."
"The number of times I’ve weeped when a pet died, or spent way too many hours comforting a dog with separation anxiety, or spent hours off the clock with a boarder who needed to be rushed to a vet office, wouldn’t trade it for the world."
"Some pets just suck though, not gonna lie."- breadandbirdsDogs Stripping GIF by Artero Professional LineGiphy
They Just Want To Go Home!
"I'm a server."
"No matter how much we insist it's 'okay' that you are keeping the entire restaurant open after we've closed, please know we are 100% lying."
"We will get fired if we deviate from anything other than pure delight that you are keeping us from going home."
"We dread it."
"Please don't believe us."- MorddSith187
Don't Be Fooled By The Price
"I used to work in jewelry."
"Most of the prettiest gemstones are also very affordable."
"Tanzanite is a beautiful purple and looks nicer than amethyst."
"Topaz comes in lots of colors, including a pretty blue color which can be as nice as aquamarine."
"Opals aren't as brightly rainbow hued as they look in pictures."- rubicks56
What Are You Looking At?!?!
"Almost every hairstylist gets the heebie jeebies when we shampoo your hair and you just stare up at us."
"CLOSE. YOUR. DAMN. EYES at the shampoo bowl!"- picklemetimberzzHair Wash GIF by ALLBLK (formerly known as UMC)Giphy
You're More Qualified Than You Think!
"Used to screen resumes for small companies."
"Job 'requirements' are more of a wish-list situation."
"Never let some unchecked boxes deter you from applying, you have no idea what the applicant pool is like."
"The biggest boon, especially at small companies, is someone who legitimately cares."- TwoPesetas
If You Wonder What Makes It So Delicious...
"There is way more butter than you think in almost every dish you eat at fancy restaurants, and that is usually the reason you won't see the amount of calories in each dish."
"5 years as a chef in Italian cuisine head chef, 8 years in an Italian kitchen."
" f I could recomend one guide book for you all to have in your kitchen it would be Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat: Mastering the Elements of Good Cooking by Samin Nosrat."
"Yes there are a plethora of others but this one is my personal favorite."- BackslashR
That's Why It Smells So Familiar!
"Former bath and body works associate here."
"The scents they 'discontinue' will come back with a different name and new marketing."
"They’re just recycling the scents."- xyenz08Bath And Body Works Perfume GIF by Bath & Body Works Asia AustraliaGiphy
Nothing Wrong With A Second Opinion
"Some therapists/counselors are on the wrong side of the couch, so to speak."
"If you feel your mental health provider is unhinged, they may very well be."- FriktionalTales
"I'm a forklift driver at a plastics manufacturing facility."
"We melt down various types of plastic into sheets, then a different department molds them into whatever the customer asks for."
"We're a food supply company, so that means everything has to be spotless, right?"
"When I worked in the molding department, the machines had toothed chains to hold the plastic in place while it was being molded."
"Those chains were constantly over greased, and the plastic would rub up against various sections, so at the end of every shift, no matter what machine I was on, I had to clean up big puddles of plastic powder/grease slime not only from the floor, but from key sections of the machine itself."
"Plastics manufacturing companies are constantly at war with each other to produce the least amount of scrap."
"In my region, we're #1 for least scrap produced."
"On paper, anyway."
"In reality, we throw away about 30-40 lbs of plastic every day."
"This is because the plastic we throw away is not able to be recycled."
"About 60% of the material is like this."
"Or because it would cost too much to grind up, the remaining 40%."
"Not only that, but you know how I said the place has to be spotless?"
"Well one of the supervisors on the other shifts chews AND SPITS into a trash can on the production floor!"
"Needless to say, I and my supervisor are trying to get him out of there, not just because of that, he's also the laziest man you've ever seen."
"Sits in the break room the whole shift then complains that his job is so boring."
"Remember these things next time you eat a prepackaged meal."- forklift_in_disguiseAnimation Burn GIFGiphy
Don't Give In To Pressure!
"Mental Health Care /Healthcare worker."
"When hired, the company that you work for will try to dissuade you from forming a union."
"This is not only illegal, it would probably prevent at least half of the problems between the staff and the administration."-jironspoon
As NOT Seen On TV...
"Law enforcement, specifically policing, is not very interesting the majority of the time and certainly not like what documentaries, films and TV make it out to be."
"I'll give you some examples to compare of some of the biggest misconceptions/tropes out there perpetuated by the media coverage of criminal justice/law enforcement."
"MISSING PEOPLE CASES."
"The majority of the time, especially these types of investigations, are nowhere near as eventful as they are thought to be."
"In fact, typically all missing persons are located within 24-48 hours after being reported as such."
"Usually, this is because someone in the family or friend group of the missing person knows where the subject is but for whatever reason, a lack of communication or miscommunication has occurred."
"It is much less common for the subject of the case to have been a victim of foul play, but the media obviously cover the cases where a homicide or something else suspicious has occurred."
"These are often sensationalized, unfortunately, when covered by the media."
"Especially when there is a suggestion that the victim may have been victim to a serial killer or other dangerous unknown persons."
"In reality, most of the cases of this will have been the result of ongoing domestic violence, drug deals gone wrong etc., rather than being committed by a complete random and/or a serial killer."
"In short, it is far more common for someone to be murdered by a person they know and trust than someone they don't."
"TYPES OF CRIMES THAT ARE DEALT WITH."
"At least in the UK, where I live, from what I have heard is that many more of the calls received by police are more likely to be things like Road Traffic Collisions (RTCs), arson/house fires, robberies and misdemeanor offenses than they are to be much more serious offenses such as murder etc."
"However, obviously it seems that the media do not cover this kind of stuff since it doesn't have the same shock factor as homicides, but it is another way in which false expectations of the job of a police officer is perpetuated."
"Bottom line is that I just get frustrated with the fact that so many people seem to underestimate and under appreciate the hard work that comes with being in the forces, but also how the job is usually far more mundane than it is made out to be."
"Especially when that is the main reason people are attracted to the job."- PM_ME_SHIT_IDKSeason 19 Nbc GIF by SVUGiphy
Exactly How "Doers Get More Done"...
"You can return dead plants to Home Depot."
"The handwritten markdowns on sales tags on merchandise that you see on the sales floor, if it’s in the middle of the month, you can ask for a bigger discount and will likely get it."
"Never ask at the end of the month, because all the markdown allowances are usually eaten up and you will likely not get the discount."
"There are cameras everywhere."
"Except the bathroom."
"You will get caught shoplifting by a loss prevention person, if they are at the store that day you are there."
"Otherwise, you can walk out with a lawnmower, and tell the cashier you paid at the other register on the other side of the store, wave an old Home Depot receipt at her and tell her to have a great day- and keep pushing the lawnmower to your car and drive off."
"If you return a faucet, every part better be in the box, otherwise, they will give you hard time-not! "
"Hell, you can return half cans of spray paint!"
"Also, if a sales associate is rude to you, don’t be afraid to call a manager on them while you're in the store."
"Those people are paid to be there to help you, especially in these departments:appliances, flooring, windows and doors, flooring, and kitchen/plumbing."
"All those sales associates are paid well."
"If you are lucky to have a Home Depot with a Kitchen design department in it, just fyi, those sales associates are the top paid people in the store."
"They know everything about most departments."
"Their hourly can top out at $42 an hour in some cases."
"The lowest hourly is $13-14, benefits are great."
"Very rarely does Home Depot hire management from the outside."
"They always promote from within the ranks."
"Every day is different."
"One day you might have two customers who are brothers in the paint department who start fighting and progress to throwing at each other five gallon buckets of oil-based primer on one another who end up being arrested, covered head to toe in white paint and the cops trying to figure out how to get them in the police car with all that paint all over them."
"OR You are taking customers to the vault in the back because a tornado is about to hit the store."
"So, most people who work there do not find it boring."- Southern_9098Dragging Home Depot GIF by Megan BatoonGiphy
Hearing secrets about certain industries divulged can be a blessing and a curse.
No one would complain about not wasting their money away on slot machines.
Though, health conscious people might not want to know what really goes into their food when they go out to eat...
Reddit user Ohyo_Ohyo_Ohyo_Ohyo asked: 'What is the worst health advice you've been given?'
Whenever we feel like something isn't right about our bodies or we're suffering from some kind of medical issues, we want them taken care of straight away.
The problem with that is, that depending on whom we're getting information from, we tend to believe in the initial diagnosis or remedy because we trust the professional sources and we want quick solutions.
But do doctors and health specialists always know what they're talking about?
Unfortunately, that is not always the case.
Strangers online shared their medical horror stories when Redditor Ohyo_Ohyo_Ohyo_Ohyo asked:
"What is the worst health advice you've been given?"
Not doing further research into something that raises eyebrows can be a fatal mistake.
Turns Out It Was Brain Cancer
"i went cross eyed and my primary said 'could be a sinus thing, get some mucinex.'”
"turns out it was glioblastoma."
"Wow, that's an absurdly sh**ty doctor. The same thing happened to my mother and it was quickly determined that it was stage 4 lung cancer. She made it about 3 months after that. She was 48 and I was 18 so the idea that any doctor would ignore that is infuriating to me."
Second Opinion Saves Lives
"My primary doctor kept telling me that nothing was wrong with my thyroid, and I was a hypochondriac."
"I had been told at 12 years old that I had thyroid issues and she told me that doctor was wrong. I had to see a whole other doctor to get a referral to the endocrinologist because she literally refused to refer me to one."
"The endocrinologist said, I had scarring all over my thyroid, I had Hashimoto’s, and my levels were horrible, and she didn’t know what the doctor was talking about. She said she was glad I advocated for myself."
"I was not the recipient of this 'advice' but I had a coworker proudly say how small her new grandchild was when they were born and that her daughter smoked her whole pregnancy to try and have a smaller baby. This was in like 2010, not the 1960s for reference."
"ETA: smoked cigarettes. clarified since that can mean more than one thing."
"Was sick for a year in my late teens. Saw multiple specialists to find the cause. Experimented with diet. Saw a naturopath that did some ‘electric pulse test’ thing that apparently gave indicators of organ health. After a few visits, and months of eating the weirdest sh*t, the test said things were improving (including my gallbladder). Months went on but I was still quite sick. I eventually ended up in hospital and one of my specialists decided to take my appendix out on a whim to see if it might help. Turns out I had something called a ‘grumbling appendix’ and it completely fixed me. Funny thing is, while they were in there, they discovered I was born without a gallbladder."
These are not appropriate remedies.
That's Not How That Works
"When I had an urinary tract infection someone told me to wash my vagina with vinegar..."
"And maybe add some diced onions and tomatoes to make a refreshing Mediterranean salad."
"Just push through whenever you're sick. If you can get to a doctor's office for a doctor's certificate you can get to school/college/work."
"My childhood pediatrician told my parents that 'A sick child never smiles.'”
"I tend to laugh/smile when I’m nervous or uncomfortable to self regulate."
"A doctor once told my parents that a child who isn’t crying can’t really be hurt. Because of that, it took me days to convince my parents to take me to the doctor after I fell on my arm because I wasn’t crying. It turns out it was broken."
"Ignoring" The Problem Isn't A Solution
"A friend of mine was in horrible pain, and was repeatedly told (by multiple doctors) that she should stop complaining and just get used to it because periods are painful and that’s the way it is."
"After being blown off for years, she finally got a doctor to take her pain seriously- and it turned out she had severe endometriosis. The surgeon said it was the worst case he had ever seen in his career, and was horrified that it had gotten so advanced with no one listening to her."
Choking On Blood
"The school nurse telling me to tilt my head back for a bloody nose. That was an awful experience."
"I do like doing this because when I cough up the blood I can pretend I’m in a period drama and I have tuberculosis."
These Redditors discovered that all pain is not necessarily "normal."
"Doctor said certain pain is normal as you get older. Turns out it was cancer."
"That's a fibrous strip of breast tissue, you're too young to have breast cancer."
"Delayed diagnosis by 6 months. I was 31."
Thinking Twice About Back Pain
"I got from a doctor, 'everyone has back pain. There’s nothing wrong with you, just use a heating pad.' It was kidney stones."
"Yikes, I am so sorry."
"I had a kinda similar experience. I went to the doctor for a morning appointment to get some persistent, worsening back pain checked out. Doc asked me where my back pain was, looked me in the eyes and told me I was fine and must have just slept wrong. He shut me down when I tried to advocate for myself."
"That night, I was admitted to the ER due to the crippling pain I was in. Turns out I had a serious kidney infection that was turning septic."
"One of the ER staff who helped me told me if I had waited another 24 hours, my kidneys would have shut down and I very likely would have died from organ failure?!"
"I’ve been dismissed by doctors over and over again in my personal health journey, and it is so frustrating and scary, as they’ve dismissed me for 'being dramatic' when there’s actually something very serious going on with my body."
Vitamin D Overdose
"If you have pale skin, get just a little sunburnt every day so that your skin will 'learn' to get a tan. That’s how everyone else does it."
"My Solar Keratosis skin cancers would beg to disagree."
As much as we want to believe our doctors when they give us a health assessment and assure us we're "fine," you should never ignore your inner voice telling you that something is not right.
Your conscience is there for a reason.
Even if a doctor tells you it's okay to ignore the problem, you should think twice about ignoring your gut feelings.
When giving a speech and making an argument, the most effective way to reach other people or get your point across is to speak with conviction.
However, speaking with conviction doesn't always mean people are speaking the truth... or even coherently.
Redditor MonkeyGentleman420 was curious to hear more stories of ludicrous things people said with unwavering conviction, leading them to ask:
"What is the stupidest thing someone has told you with complete conviction?"
We Know How Often Birds Check Clocks...
'That we set the clocks forwards and backwards so the birds don’t get confused with their migration patterns."- alliecita410
Speaking From Experience?
"'Two people can breathe underwater forever if they have a hose'."
"The first person breathes in while the second breathes out, then the first person breathes out and the second person breathes in etc'."- PahoojyMan
"'If you are dream about falling and you hit the ground in your sleep you'll actually die'."
"'It's been proven'."
"I said 'If you die in your sleep, how can anyone know what you were dreaming?'"
"Ruined a favorite story of hers."
"Sorry."- FrankieMintfalling GIFGiphy
Because ALL Cops Ask For Your SSN Before Cuffing You...
"From a coworker: 'If you don't have a social security number then the government can't do anything to you'."
"I asked if that meant, if I didn't have an SSN then I could just go kill someone on the street and the government couldn't arrest me."
"'Yep', he said, 'if you don't have an SSN then they can't enforce any laws on you'."- AllAboutThePotatoes
Keep Them Away From Needles...
"A former coworker insisted that the body believes the ears are injuries, and we are all constantly trying to heal our own ears closed."
"The only thing keeping them open, you ask?"
"We worked in healthcare."- Reflection_Secure
Credit To the Visual Effects Designer
"A girl I worked with was convinced that every single mythological creature was real."
"I’ll never forget one of her claims."
“Think about it, every movie you done seen all those creatures and aliens and sh*t, all that’s real."
"Someone has to have actually seen it to come up with that!”
"Apparently there’s no such thing as the human imagination to her."
"So yes, transformers are real, Godzilla is real, Independence Day is real."
"This was a 20-year-old that said all of this."- Dragonborn83196Unicorn GIF by MOODMANGiphy
In Theory... Still Wrong!
"That the speed of light wasn’t like an actual number, it was just a figure of speech."- sunbearimon·
Check The Date...
"Sunburn is not caused by the sun, it is actually caused by sunblock."
"If you don't use sunblock then you will never be burned."
"Sunburn was created by the sun cream industry to sell their products."
"Seems easily testable, why not lie on the beach all day in one position with no sun block and see what happens?"
"Make sure you fall asleep for maximum effect."
"You go bright red and then blister to the point that you get taken to hospital for a combination of sunstroke and the beginning of shock then spend the rest of the holiday indoors face down with regular application of creams and replacement paraffin patches on the burns."
"It puts a bit of a dampener on your 2 week break."
"Sunburn is mentioned in Livy's history of the second Punic war and others over 2000 years ago which is solid proof that the 'Big Sunscreen' claim is ridiculous."
"However it would be hand-waved away by a True Believer of big Sunscreen."- Magnus_40Sonne Sunburn GIF by Mitteldeutscher RundfunkGiphy
Ignorance Is Not Always Bliss...
"A distant relative, recently retired, once told me that he was going to hire a gardener and a housekeeper because 'the government will give you a grant to pay for them now'."
"This was a few minutes after a lengthy rant about how the welfare state should be scrapped because only lazy people lose their jobs and need to claim benefits."
"The same relative, some years ago, also announced with absolute conviction that he was going to hire a neighbor as a cleaner because 'she won't have anything to do now her kids are grown up'."- Plantagenesta
The Price Of Never Looking Up!
"Pineapples aren't real."
"They're entirely manmade and do not exist in nature."- tricksterloki
ALWAYS CONSULT YOUR DOCTOR!!!
"My dad was experiencing end stage renal failure (was on dialysis at the time and has since had a transplant)."
"My best friend's boyfriend at the time looked at me dead in the eye and said he could reverse his condition with a vegan diet and that the only important organ in the body was the skin, so as long as you take good care of your skin, your other organs will function properly."
"Mind you, by the time my dad got on dialysis his kidneys were functioning at 11% and his SKIN WAS JUST FINE."- lyingintheleaves
But What Causes Cavities?
"I'm a dental hygienist."
"We had a patient come in with terrible teeth."
"They thought toothpaste caused cancer."- dilapidatedfungus
"That women don't burp or fart, because only men have (the ability to pass) gas."
"Spoiler alert: he was horrified when I burped in front of him."- sequoia_summers
Guilt Is Easier When You Know It's Coming.
"First girlfriend was religious, and apparently it was okay that we had sex 'as long as she feels bad about it after'."
"Pre-planning regret was her loophole to do what she wanted."- Lone_Buckseason 2 famalam GIF by BBC ThreeGiphy
When people do speak with conviction, more often than not they firmly believed what they say.
So much so, that they have trouble believing the person brave enough to correct them.
In spite of the concrete evidence thrown in front of them...
When you're in a relationship, it's important to stay alert.
Yes, you of course want to give in to love.
But when you start seeing red flags, be vigilant.
You're gut always knows more than you give it credit for.
Sometimes those flags are a sign that it's time to jump ship.
if you see them... run.
Redditor Shinfekta wanted to compare notes on why people would immediately end a relationship, so they asked:
"What red flag is an instant break up reason for you?"
The signs are always there, but I tend to put on blinders.
I need to do better.
A Big DealIllustration Text GIF by Jacqueline Jing LinGiphy
"Someone that casually says they've cheated. There's no way around that for me."
"Or worse when they treat cheating as somehow noble."
"Wanting and demanding my attention but not reciprocating whatsoever."
"My ex. She would get pissed when she would talk to me about something while I was working and I wasn’t giving her my full attention. But every time I wanted to tell her something while she was doing nothing, she would get 'ADHD distracted' and completely ignore me or interrupt me to say something completely irrelevant."
"I had a friend like this! he literally completely ignored me for 6 months and then blew up at me for not responding to him within an hour. Very strange."
"Never admitting a mistake."
"I know a total hottie that is notoriously known for not being able to admit he’s wrong, sucks because he’s a gem outside of this. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a fair and responsible person in general… but he 100% can’t admit he was wrong in banter or a light argument even when he realizes he realizes he’s wrong hahaha lost confidence in him ASAP."
"This is a big one, even when these types of people apologize they still pass the blame. 'I'm sorry for my behavior but you made me really angry.'"
"Unmanaged mental illness. Never again."
"I was with a girl that had that and I helped her through all of it and it was so hard to deal with it all but somehow I managed but when she felt better she just left me for her best friend’s ex and I was left with all that trauma because I loved her with all my heart and soul but she was just using me to feel better… and when she broke up with her best friend’s ex she came crawling back begging me to be with her again but it was too late.. the damage has already been done and I can’t do that again even though I still love her but I can’t tell her that... sorry for venting."
AfterthoughtSad Sponge Bob GIF by SpongeBob SquarePantsGiphy
"If someone makes you feel alone, that you don't matter, or if you are a second choice on most of the occasions, you need to leave."
Always know when to acknowledge your feelings.
And know when to depart.
BehaviorAndre Leon Talley Manners GIF by GIPHY NewsGiphy
"How they treat animals, children, elderly, handicapped, and service workers."
"A wise man once said: judge a person not by how they treat their equals, but by how they treat their inferiors."
"Being mean as their 'thing' or 'just a joke.'"
"'I'm just sassy!'" No, you're a bi*ch."
"I’m going to be honest, with certain friends I am absolutely ruthlessly mean, to the point that people are actually concerned it’s just bullying."
"However with strangers, I’m nothing like that. And the friends that I am meant to, they do the exact same thing back to me. We also know that if we need each other, then the meanness is dropped instantly, and it’s nothing but support and love."
"Zero accountability for anything. Everything they do is absolutely justifiable because, well, they mean well."
"Yeah, I was looking for this answer! And it’s true outside of romantic relationships also! I had to end a friendship over this exact behavior- it was never her fault, always the victim, and her hurtful behavior shouldn’t be addressed because she 'meant well…' but my feelings are still hurt so why don’t I matter?!"
"This. Can't stand people who always play the victim or blame everyone else and never take accountability for what they do."
"This one may take a while, but I would break up if I notice them creeping over personal boundaries, and not stopping when I tell them about it."
"People cross each others' boundaries all the time. I'm happy to give the benefit of the doubt until it becomes apparent that they have no intention to respect me."
"For example, if I don't like tickles or being startled, don't do that. It's not about the tickling, it's about them respecting me. And if there's no respect, there's no relationship."
Talk to MeSarah Jessica Parker Hbo GIF by DivorceGiphy
"If I'm hearing about a problem in our relationship from someone else rather than the partner. It shows huge trust issues."
"I've seen three divorces in my life, and they all were the result of the girl venting to her mother and her friends about issues she should have discussed with her husband."
Communication is key.
If you're not talking to you're partner, why are they you're partner?
People accumulate facts throughout life on a wide variety of subjects.
Some are mundane while others are weird, wild or wonderful.
One subject a lot of people focus on is animals. Most people have a favorite animal that fascinates them that they want to know all about.
Reddit user FunChemical3182 asked:
"What is the weirdest animal fact you know?"
"Platypus glow blueish green under ultraviolet light."
"They also don’t have nipples, they just exude milk from glands under the skin and the baby’s lap it up."
"They have electrolocation in their bills that lets them detect their food under water."
"And they lay eggs."
"The more I find out about them the more I understand why people first thought they were fake."
"After seeing all these platypus facts I am convinced these things are aliens that have been abandoned on Earth."
"Mantis Shrimp have 16 different sets of cones. Rods and cones are in your eyes. Cones see color, rods see light and motion."
"Dogs have 2 sets of cones—green and blue. Humans have 3 sets of cones—green, blue and red."
"Mantis Shrimp are seeing colors we can't comprehend and explains why they're very colorful."
"That’s not even the strangest thing about them."
"They can also punch as fast as a .22 bullet which cause a cavitation bubble which boils the water around them at temperatures of several thousand Kelvins."
"Cats have the mental capacity of a 2-year-old which makes a lot of sense."
~ Alive_Ad823Cats Dragging GIFGiphy
"When a female sloth wants a mate she'll hang onto a tree branch and just scream."
Good Thing They're So Small
"Dragonflies are the most successful predators on Earth."
"When lions choose prey they have like a 10% chance of catching it."
"African painted dogs—who hunt in packs—have the highest kill rate of any mammal, successfully catching 51% of their prey."
"When a dragonfly locks onto a target, it has a 99.9% success rate!"
On A Swivel
"Owls have really long necks, but it's hard to notice that because their feathers are so fluffy."
What About Cousin It?
"Sea otters are the most densely furred animal with 600,000 to 1,000,000 hair follicles per square inch."
"Dogs have about 15,000 per square inch, humans on average are between 800 to 1,290 hairs per square inch."
Or Two Sets Of Twins
"Armadillos always have offspring as quadruplets."
"Octopus punch other fish for no reason—so, for fun."
"There's a direct correlation between species' intelligence and dickish behavior."
Looks Are Deceiving
"Polar bear fur isn't white—it's translucent (for most frequencies of light). And they have black skin underneath."
"So polar bear fur lets all the light through to their black skin to warm them—except for a few visible frequencies to keep them camouflaged as white."
Who's Going To Attack One‽‽
"Honey badgers can turn their a**holes inside out and use the smell to deter attackers."
"Not sure what exactly has the guts to attack a honey badger, but if they have the courage to do so, the badger sure as hell isn’t gonna make it easy."
"The Blanket Octopus exhibits the highest degree of sexual dimorphism known."
"Females: About 6 feet across."
"Males: About one inch."
"Dolphins will intentionally use puffer fish to get high."
"They upset blowfish so they inflate, and therefore emit poison. It gets the dolphins high. Then they pass it around, literally."
"Not just the dolphins. I recently saw a video about 10 animals that like to get high. Very interesting."
"Lemurs do that with giant centipedes/millipedes too."
Fabrizio Frigeni on Unsplash
Better Than Bike Helmets
"Woodpeckers' tongues wrap around their brains to cushion them from the vibrations of slamming their face into trees all day."
"Their tongues also have barbs to grab bugs out of the holes."
"Their brains have additional cushioning because, you know, they spend their days smashing their face as hard as possible into trees."
"Argonauts [paper nautili] are small octopuses that are too lazy to have intercourse."
"They detach their penises and toss them into the open sea to mate with female argonauts."
"The detachable 'd*ck' is a tiny tentacle, complete with suckers and sperm, that develops in a cavity under the eye of a male argonaut [paper nautilus]."
"When it's time to mate, the tentacle explodes out of the cavity, instantly killing the male argonaut. The tentacle then swims towards a female argonaut to insert itself."
What's your favorite weird animal fact?