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Police Officers Share Their Best "Oh Sh*t" Moments

Police Officers Share Their Best "Oh Sh*t" Moments
Kage Nesbitt / EyeEm/ GettyImages

Being a police officer means putting your life on the line for the safety of others. That itself should be enough to send many officers home every night with thoughts of, "Oh man, that was crazy." Occasionally, though, there are those nights where it's all just a little too much. You find yourself saying to you or your partner, "Oh...sh*t."

(TRIGGER WARNING: Some stories involve gunshot wounds and suicide.)


Reddit user, u/ilkersever, wanted to hear the best of the worst when they asked:

Police officers of reddit, what was your "oh sh*t" moment?

Perhaps Not The Most Comfortable Bed

We were looking for a guy who stole guns from his ex and found him under a pile of clothes in a closet at a different house. Unfortunately there was like 7 kids sleeping in the same room so I start getting them out of there while my partner cuffs the guy who is pretending to sleep. We decide to drag him out and I go to move the mattress to get it out of the way and we find the stolen guns under where the kids were sleeping.

handsprings

A Surprise To Remember

My husband has been a police officer for over 20 years. One night he was patrolling the downtown area when he noticed a purse someone had left behind. He opened the bag to check for id and found a turd. Some lady took a big a-- sh-t in her handbag and left it behind. He'll talk about autopsies and burnt bodies, but that is the one story he would rather forget.

crispytofubites

Not What It Appears

This happened August of last year, was about 1-2 in the morning when a 911 hang up call came in where all that was heard was screaming and swearing.

I was the closest unit, riding alone as my partner had been voluntold for another assignment that set of days, so when I got out into the area, I was initially waiting for backup however as I was walking up to the house, I heard several voices screaming.

Rushing up to the house, the first thing I noticed was blood.... everywhere. The floor, the walls, the door, all covered to shoulder height. A distraught woman screamed and pointed me towards the living room.

Once I get into the living room, I see a male and female on a couch, both covered in blood. The male had a massive laceration on his right forearm, and the female had taken a belt and snake wrapped it around his arm to try and stop the bleeding. Seeing how the belt was applied, I knew it wasn't doing anything to stop the blood flow, so I pulled out my tourniquet and as I prepped it said to the guy "This is gonna hurt like hell, but it'll stop the bleeding"

I applied the tourniquet just above the top of his bicep, and knew it was on properly when he told me his hand had started to go numb. It was at that point I noticed a second deep gash on his tricep that went down to the bone.

It took EMS about 15 minutes to get to the house, and the paramedic made it abundantly clear that had I not applied the tourniquet, the male would have bled out long before they were able to get there.

In the end, turns out the guy had come home drunk, and forgot his keys... climbed up to a second story window and punched his way into the house, with near deadly results.

Pol5085

Not What It Appeared To Be

As a rookie I was responding to an alarm at restaurant that was supposed to be "haunted by a women" The first officer that arrived was an older officer that didn't do much and didn't ever get excited on the radio. As soon as he arrived he asked for a second unit in a high pitched tone. As I pulled in he had his shotgun out and he was leaned up over his hood. My first thought was " oh sh-t someone is breaking in ".

When I ran up to him and asked what up. All he said was as he pulled up and his lights hit the building a women jumped off the roof and disappeared. He was clearly shook. Me and another officer checked the building and found no evidence that someone had been there. It made an impression on me and I never went back to the restaurant at night without another officer.

Bennett507

Improper Testing

I was a rookie cop in a small town. I was driving to a check on a report of a large group of kids causing a disturbance at a school parking lot late at night. I realized I had not tested my PA speaker, which I planned on using to disperse the crowd. On my way to the call, slowly rolling down a residential street at 2am with my windows down, I decide to tap my PA mic a couple times to check it. First two taps, can't tell if its working. I slow down. I tap the mic several more times. Definitely hear the loud speakers that time. At that moment, I hear "what the f-ck are you doing?!" I look out my passenger window and see this old dude sitting on his porch in his underwear, looking pissed. Our eyes locked, I realized I had no decent excuse for clicking my loud speaker in a quiet neighborhood in the middle of the night, so I didn't say anything back to him and I floored it up the road.

Definitely an oh sh-t moment at the time (maybe different than what OP is looking for but I get tired of traditional "war stories"). The awkward on this encounter was through the roof.

SpartacusVII

Nothing Better To Do In The Countryside

I worked in a pretty rural farming community. One night some time after midnight we get a call of some young men shooting Amish horses and maybe some cows.

We had a general location, direction of travel, color of car, no make or model. I found a car of the same color in the vicinity. I called it out and initiated a traffic stop. About that time I was joined by several cars from multiple jurisdictions.

We conducted a full felony stop at gunpoint. As I was taking one of the suspects to my car, my sergeant tells me that this is obviously the wrong vehicle. The occupants of the vehicle ended up being under 21 and had consumed some alcoholic beverages that night.

We explained to him the reason for the stop was that we take minors consuming alcohol very serious in our County.

Never did find a vehicle that was shooting the horses and cows.

Davidharley1903

Saying Good-Bye To Family

Not me but my dad. This was when he was a relatively new cop. Responded to a car crash, potentially fatal. Arrived at the scene and realized that the victim was my uncle, his sister's husband. The wreck was too bad, there wasn't much they could do. He had to watch his brother-in-law die.

Waddletonzz

"Oh Sh*t" By Association

During the first week of ride-alongs right out of the academy, one of my best friends responds to a disturbance at a hotel. The whole week up until this had been pretty fluff. He, the officer who was training him, and another, all pile into an elevator and go up a few floors to where the disturbance was.

The elevator door opens and there is a guy standing waiting for them with a gun. All 4 open fire like something out of a movie. Officers walked away without a scratch. C

An "oh sh-t" moment for him and a "what the f-ck" moment for me as he told me over a few beers the next day. Talk about earning your keep from day one

justabuck

"Nightmares For Days"

Went to an accident call about a sports car wrapped around a tree. The car and tree were engulfed in a massive fireball. One of the residents nearby managed to save the driver but received third degree burns on his hands in the process.

Couldn't save the passenger and I didn't make it in time to do anything. She melted to the seat. Driver was shit faced and had no idea. I had nightmares for days and still remember the smell.

Thatoneguy567576

What Could Have Been...

American officer here, Midwest. I was backing up another officer on his traffic stop, it was about 1 AM. Driver was very intoxicated. Other subjects were in the vehicle. Each person in the vehicle is well known to us for gun violence and drug trafficking.

After securing the driver for his violations we determined contraband was in the vehicle from driver admission, observing and open bottle of alcohol, and smell of burnt cannabis (it's illegal in my state to possess cannabis at this time).

We ask thr two to exit the vehicle for a search. As they begin to exit they jump out and knock an officer down, hurting his elbow and knee. They then take off running in seperate directions.

3 officers take off after one, catch him. He was tazed due to resistance and posessing a stolen firearm. (For note he is a convicted felon)

I took off after the other subject, by myself without realizing it. I chase him on foot for about a block. I'm about 10 feet from him, not gaining or losing ground but keeping pace. I see him reach into his back waist band and profuce a handgun.

Out of reaction I start to unholster my firearm. Before I even draw down on him he begins to turn towards me.

For some reason, whether by accident or intentionally I really dont know, he dropped the gun. We paused and just looked at each other for probably a whole second.

He began running again and I re holstered and continued running after him. This epic heart thumping chase ended with him tripping over a gutter and my catching him with no actual force being used.

Also my catch was a convicted felon and the firearm was stolen.

P.s I typrrd from mobile so please excuse typos.

Legion257

Tough To Put Down

Got a call for a emotionally disturbed person. Arrive on scene and a 350lb man built like an NFL lineman is passed out of on the floor face down. His wife says he suffers from PTSD from the first Iraq war and that he was an army ranger. He had been drinking heavily. His son is on scene and about 16 years old. The man begins to wake up and proceeds to smash his forehead into the ground, repeatedly. We call for an ambulance. A small pool of blood begins to form on the floor. The wife grabs a rag and goes to wipe it up when this guy's head jerks up real quick, his face contorted in rage. He grabs the wife by the neck and throws her clear across the room onto the couch. We immediately jump on him but he is preternaturally strong.

There are four of us and we are each fighting one limb. The kid jumps in and helps us get two sets of cuffs on him because one set was not wide enough to connect his wrists behind his back. I ride in the ambulance to the hospital with him while he glares at me angrily reciting his military registration number and telling me I won't get any information out of him and that I'm a towel head (I don't remotely look like I'm from the region). The entire ride I hope that he doesn't break out of the cuffs. If I'm being honest, I'm not sure we would've gained control of him if the kid hadn't helped.

nypdthrwaway

Dodge, Duck, Dip, Dive, And Dodge

Was on a traffic stop. My Sergeant came and backed me up due to having to possibly tow the vehicle. My Sergeants vehicle was behind mine and we were both in the right lane. My Sergeant was sitting in his car and I exited my car to go talk to him. As I walked closer to his car I heard a vehicle's engine rev all the way out but I couldn't see it.

For a split second I knew what was going to happen and though oh sh-t but couldn't react fast enough. The vehicle I heard smashed into the back of my Sergeants SUV which struck me, throwing me into the road. The driver was completely hammered and didn't have a license. This happened last Sunday and I have surgery in a couple weeks for my knee and my Sergeant has a broken back.

Terracehunt

Power To Do Many Things

It was actually before I was sworn in, still as a cadet in the Highway Patrol: Loading live rounds into my service revolver for the first time.

Like, these could kill someone.

Moon_Zoo

Rough Start

I pulled up on a teen sleeping in a vehicle at the end of a country road. When I ran the license plate, I found out that he was reported as a runaway. The doors on the vehicle were locked, so I knocked on the window to wake him up. Once he woke up and realized what was going on, he shot himself in the mouth with a rifle he had hidden under his blanket. Rough way to start my shift.

Send10-71

Sometimes, You Just Need To Talk

Was doing a welfare check at a house for a suicidal male. Only person living at the house, car in driveway, and house was locked up. Gathered some more info and was told where a key was. Opened the door, announced myself and starting searching the house expecting to find a dead body. Opened a closet door and the guy was hiding in there with a rifle next to him.

If he wanted me dead I wouldn't be typing this. Dude was having some issues. Sat and talked for about half an hour. Told me he heard me but didn't want to talk to anyone. Got him the help he needed.

StubbornDutchman

Are you a police officer with a story to tell that would blow minds? Share it with us.

Infamous Internet Rumors That Ended Up Being True

Reddit user strakerak asked: 'What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?'

boy playing at laptop inside room
Photo by Ludovic Toinel on Unsplash

In 2017, I returned to my office after my lunch break to hear my supervisors discussing Tom Petty. This seemed like a random topic to me until one of my supervisors told me Tom Petty had passed away. He was a huge fan of Petty and spent the next hour or so combing through the internet to get more information.

He came back into the room my other supervisor and I were working in and announced that Tom Petty wasn't dead after all. News outlets had jumped the gun to announce his death, but he was actually still alive.

The next day, I came in to find out that Tom Petty was dead; the news may have been premature, but true.

This is a classic example of the rumor being started on the internet. Sometimes, like with the news of Tom Petty's death, the rumor can run wild and appear everywhere. Other times, the rumor can be seen by just a few people and dismissed. However, a lot of times, these rumors turn out to be true.

Redditors know a lot of internet rumors that turned out to be true, and are eager to share.

It all started when Redditor strakerak asked:

"What started out as an internet rumor that ended up being infamously true?"

The King Of Pop

"Michael Jackson writing the music for Sonic 3."

"He actually did, but was never credited on the game because it would breach his contract with his record label."

– -WigglyLine-

"He did the same when he appeared on The Simpsons. He appeared under a pseudonym, and the Producers said it was an impersonator."

"Only years later they confirmed it really was Michael."

"His singing voice was actually done by an impersonator, though."

– given2fly_

The Truth Comes Out

"In 1998, US Men’s National Team captain John Harkes was shockingly cut from the team right before the World Cup. The coach claimed it was because Harkes wouldn’t fit into his new preferred formation, but rumors flew on the early internet that it was actually because he had slept with his teammate Eric Wynalda’s wife. The rumor was so well-known in soccer circles that Harkes expressly denied it in his autobiography the next year."

"Fast forward 12 years to 2010 and Wynalda admits it’s true. The coach then came out and admitted it was why he dropped Harkes, but that he’d planned to keep the secret as long as Wynalda did."

– guyfromsoccer

Video Evidence

"The Tim Burton Hansel and Gretel that aired once on halloween in the 80's."

"I heard for years that it was fake but I knew it was real because my dad recorded everything in the 80s and he recorded that. We let a good friend of ours borrow it and switch it over from VHS to DVD and soon after that it made its way on to the internet , and there it is now. I know it's our copy because the tracking in the beginning is screwed up. Still have the VHS."

– Frozenthickness

"There was a similar story with a Nickelodeon movie called Cry Baby Lane. It was supposed to be so scary that Nickelodeon got complaints and denied its existence for years. Someone uploaded a taped copy to youtube about a decade ago."

– PattiAllen

The Movie Business

"That North Korea hacked Sony Pictures because of The Interview movie."

"I worked in the movie business at the time and the account managers at Sony all basically needed to get new identities as all of their personal information got leaked online."

OldMastodon5363

"My partner worked on that movie and the production bought all the crew 1 year of an identity theft tracking service."

CMV_Viremia

Keep Away From The Ears Of Kids

"Some banned episodes or scenes of cartoons."

"For example, I remember there was a Dexter’s Lab cartoon where he clones evil versions of DeDe and himself and they swear like every other word (censored of course), and people debated whether it even existed cause they only aired it like once. Now it’s pretty accessible online."

– Spledidlife

Yes, It's True

"Echelon, a massive electronic espionage system by the US and allies to intercept all electronic messages, especially emails."

"In the mid-nineties it was a topic on conspiracy BBS boards. A lot of people in my bubble at the time (mainly uni students in Europe) were including fake threats to the US in the their email signatures as a way to "protest" and "fill the system with false alarms" (obviously useless)."

"Then, in 1999-2000 came out to be true and a lot of security service agencies from UK and other US allies started to admit they were part of the espionage network."

– latflickr

How The Mighty Fell

"John Edward’s love child."

– ACam574

"A reminder that he was cheating on his wife while she was hospitalized for cancer treatment."

– Fanclock314

Ugh...

"Carrie Fisher's heart attack. Some a**hole who was on the same flight was livetweeting the whole medical emergency and justified it by insisting she was just making sure the family was informed."

– everylastlight

It Actually Happened

"Every year around her birthday there was a rumor that Betty White died. When I heard she died, I scoffed, saying that dumb rumor is back.... then saw it on the news. I was in shock."

– Known-Committee8679

"The fact that Betty died literally right before she turned 100 is such a Betty White way to go out."

– Paganigsegg

Big Actor, Small Roles

"I distinctly remember some rumors about the reason why Bruce Willis was taking so many roles in sh*tty movies before it was announced he has dementia."

– KampferMann

"RedLetterMedia did a deep dive on his recent movie activity to try and work out why exactly he was taking part in basically scam-movies. They noticed he had an earpiece in one of the scenes and joked that the director was feeding him lines. I remember they even disclaimed over the rumours at the time, and possible made a follow-up vid when it was revealed to the public."

– CardinalCreepia

What To Do Next?

"That the writer of LOST were making it up as they went."

"Turned out to be absolutely true."

– homarjr

That last one was kind of obvious!

Do you have any to add? Let us know in the comment below.

Person holding large stack of books
Photo by Jay Lamm on Unsplash

Whether you're naturally interested in fun facts and trivia or not, it's always nice to know a few that you can pull out of your pocket at a moment's notice as a nice conversation starter.

But there are some fun facts out there that are so weird, people become more preoccupied with how the teller found out that information rather than the information itself.

Redditor Dry_Bus_935 asked:

"What is your 'don't ask me how I know' random fact?"

Nuclear Fail Safe

"You have quite a lot of time, certainly more than ten seconds, to turn back on the main pumps of a nuclear reactor once you have accidentally turned them off."

- egorf

"I'm not surprised. The amount of fail safes, redundancies, and emergency scenario planning for nuclear power plants is insane."

"I toured a nuclear plant and wrote my high school senior thesis on the plans put in place to ensure the Fukushima disaster would not happen at that plant."

"I'm sure the secondary pumps are plenty capable of handling the reactor until the main pumps are repaired or just turned back on."

- Borderlandsman

Happy Cat

"If your cat chews on fresh eucalyptus, they might start hallucinating and fall over repeatedly, leading to a $400 emergency vet bill just to be told she’s just kinda high."

- oddidealstronghold

"And, that's part of why koalas love it. Little stoners."

- littlebluefoxy

Archaeology: Do Not Lick

"Old human bones are very porous, so if you lick them, they’ll stick to your tongue."

- clanculcarius

Sharing is Caring

"A pigeon will only eat a Starburst if you chew it up a little bit first. Just to clarify: chew the Starburst, not the pigeon."

- OhTheHueManatee

"Instructions unclear. Pigeon unhappy."

- Wild-Lychee-3312

Intriguing Anatomy

"Everyone is here with the creepy crime stuff, and I'm just like, 'A soft fur rat has 22 nipples.'"

- horroscoblue

"Okay, so either they have really small nipples, their nipples overlap, or they have nipples in places where there shouldn't be nipples."

"(I've never written the word 'nipples' so many times in a singular sentence before.)"

- GdeGraaf

'Don't Ask Me,' Indeed!

"Turmeric can be used as clothes dye. It is capable of permanently dyeing cotton cloth even after it has passed through the digestive tract of an adult male."

- SlefeMcDichael

"You s**t your pants, didn't you?"

- PMmecrossstitch

"I'd prefer not to answer that question."

- SlefeMcDichael

High-Risk Survival Skills

"If you ever trying to survive in the Arctic, don’t eat polar bear liver. It is so high in vitamin A, it will kill you."

- WrongWayCorrigan-361

"It's also surrounded by a lethal amount of angry polar bear."

- horanc2

Real-Life Spies

"TV shows and movies go out of their way to make military/intelligence officers look bada**."

"But real-life 'spies,' by design and training, are boring. They have regular houses and standard second-hand cars, they dress down, and they have vague, boring job titles (accounts receivable) as cover, and they do not draw attention to themselves. Most come from specialized academia."

- Ok_Worth_1093

Haunting Reality

"Your muscles can keep twitching for several hours after you die."

- JustDave62

"Also, beards can appear to grow. This is however not because the beard itself grows but because the skin shrinks."

- RRautamaa

"I worked at a morgue for over eight years. If you grasp the hand of a dead body to move the arm, the hand will grasp back, but that's just muscles and tendons reacting to the tension."

- goneferalinid

The Sneakiness of Drowning

"When a drowning victim is revived, get them to a hospital as soon as possible. Drowning is the leading cause of death of kids from the age of one to seven and is ruled as accidental drowning when it comes to secondary drowning or dry drowning."

"Basically, your lungs are full of water despite being revived. Your lungs will absorb the liquid, but not before your body acidifies from high levels of carbon dioxide. The only chance to survive is to have the lungs pumped with oxygen via CPAP machine and time."

"Also, drowning is extremely quiet. You don’t hear the victim go under. And if you see flailing, do not attempt to save the victim otherwise you’ll become another drowning victim. Throw them a lifeline and hope their amygdala realizes that a rope or something is floating near them and grabs on it."

- Dfiggsmeister

Not Everyone's Favorite Chocolate

"Hershey’s chocolate has the strong smell of vomit or feces to some people (me), and that’s because they use butyric acid as a preservative. Butyric acid is the compound that makes vomit smell so bad."

"Edit: Digging further into it, there are some claims that they may not be “adding” the butyric acid, but rather it is occurring from essentially spoiling the milk in their milk chocolate. Either way, the butyric acid and putrid smell remains a part of their product."

- hefewiseman1

"That explains the weird aftertaste I always get! I don’t smell it but their chocolate always has this super unpleasant sharp/acidic aftertaste that I find repulsive. I assume this is why!!"

- PomegranateNo975

Do Not Lick the Asbestos

"Asbestos tastes like chalk. And if you lick it, it has the texture of extremely gritty sandpaper. Which is actually the feeling of microscopic asbestos needles piercing your flesh!"

- TooYoungToBeThisOld1

Mapping Out the War

"Beginning in 1911 in anticipation of the outbreak of WW1 in 1914, two statesmen, one from England and one from France, began visiting locations in France that they believed would be the settings for a number of major battles that would occur during the great war."

"Long bike rides through these future battle zones in the countryside and weeks spent building a foundation for a French-Anglo codebook that would later prove important in helping win the war."

- fjordperfect123

Avoiding Lawsuits > Protecting Patients

"Doctors, or surgeons more specifically, that make too many mistakes during surgery, ie, leaving instruments in patients, frequently gets ‘quietly traded’ to other hospitals where they continue their path of destruction with the patients not being aware of their past record. Hospitals tend to keep quiet about the matter to avoid lawsuits."

- Kittytigris

Bonus Points: Do This While Having Lunch in Your Car

"If you overfill a fast food gravy cup and then put a lid on, it will create a pressurized gravy stream that sprays all over your face and uniform while your coworker looks on in horror."

- thechaosjester776

This subReddit thread was so a roller-coaster of random facts, we've surely all walked away learning something.

But the biggest takeaway might just be: Maybe don't lick so many things.

Shocked woman covering her mouth
vaitheeswaran Nataraj/Unsplash

When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.

But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.

Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.

It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.

Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:

"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"

These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.

Bleeding Out

"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."

"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."

– DongLaiCha

Tragic News

"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."

– accountnameredacted

Bottom Of The Barrel

"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."

– Crotch-Monster

A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.

Like Father, Like Son

"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."

– psycospaz

Busted

"Flashing blue lights."

– FiddleOfGold

"This sobered me up just thinking about it."

– redmaple_syrup

Losing Sight

"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."

– MissHibernia

Quitting The Bottle

"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."

– omgtater

These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.

Unplanned House Guests

"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."

– Oneinsevenbillion75

Serious Health Warning

"Elevated liver enzymes."

"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."

"So I opted for recovery, instead."

"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."

– Far_Meal8674

The Joyride

"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."

– foxfood9116

The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?

How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.

But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.

Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.

Woman holding multiple shopping bags
Photo by freestocks on Unsplash

We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.

Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.

These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.

From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.

Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:

"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"

"Tale As Old As Time..."

"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","

"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."

"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."

"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."

"Lol!"

"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom

"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."

"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."

"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."

"I think he was a germaphobe."

"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."

"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."

"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.

"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."

"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."

"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000

Money Burn GIF by nog Giphy

Who Wore It Better?

"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."

"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."

"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."

"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'

"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"

"No."- mertsey627

Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...

"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."

"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."

"It was very low key."

"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."

"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."

"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."

"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."

"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa

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See You In Court!

"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."

'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."

"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."

"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."

"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."

"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin

It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!

"I work in a public library."

"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."

"A popular book that just came out."

"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."

"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten

A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!

"My own."

"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"

"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."

"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"

"Unacceptable!"

"This shall not stand!"

"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."

"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."

"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."

"I got over it."- DeathGrover

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Holy Matrimony!

"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."

"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."

"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."

"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."

"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."

"It's just a party."

"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree

When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...

"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore

In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...

"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."

"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."

"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."

"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."

"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."

"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."

"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."

"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."

"We don’t offer wrapping services."

"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."

'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae

Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso Giphy

Happiest Place On Earth!

"I used to work for Disney."

"That in itself should tell you everything."

"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."

"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."

"Suddenly got worse huh?"

"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."

"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."

"I'm not kidding."

"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."

"My wife worked booking."

"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."

"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."

"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."

"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."

"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."

"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong

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The horror!

Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!

It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...

Said absolutely no one.