Police Officers Break Down How Stupid Calls Became Serious In An Instant
911 is not a joke people! Calling in the police is something you must be sure about. Once those in blue are involved, the game changes. However, it can be surprising how small incidents can turn into mayhem and tragedy. Life can flip in an instant, so just be competent as a person.
Redditor TurdNugget6952 wanted law enforcement to speak up about the consequences when dialing 911 without purpose by asking...
Police of reddit, what dumb call turned serious very quickly?
The Hulk Vehicle....Giphy
"When I graduated high school, I got hired by my pd as a community service officer (CSO). We handled minor calls, transported prisoners and served arrest warrants."
"One day I was dispatched to go investigate a hulk vehicle. A hulk vehicle for those who don't know is a vehicle that has been abandoned on someones property and the property owner, who doesn't have the title, wants it gone. Law enforcement can come out and issue what is known as a hulk vehicle permit which allows the property owner to have the vehicle towed. So I get on scene of this large, wooded property (i'm guessing a couple hundred acres). The property owner is a management company and they want to build houses on the property and they discovered several hulk vehicles during their site visit."
"So I go about walking through the woods and investigating the vehicles as I came to them. They had been abandoned for at least 20 years so it wasn't much of an issue. I finally reach the last vehicle which was pretty far into the wood and as I'm checking it I realized there was an active meth lab operation next to me. I couldn't see anyone around and I backed out the same way I came in fearing booby traps. Got back to my car and called for immediate back up. Officers surrounded the scene and SWAT got called out to clear the woods. The found 4 suspects hiding, all were armed and they discovered a pipe bomb booby trap less than 50 feet from the car I was inspecting. Had I gone out a different way or approached the lab I would have been killed."
"Fortunately I listened to my gut and didn't touch anything and went out the same way I came in." techguru69
"Not a cop, but the son of one. Lots of stories i could tell, but one has always stood out in particular. Police were called one night due to noise complaint at someones house. When police arrive, it's discovered that there is meth and the person in the house (we'll call him Jerry) is on it like no tomorrow."
"More cops eventually show up and none of them can keep Jerry down. They try using a taser, but it's ineffective on it's own. As taser is getting a new battery, eight cops tackle Jerry all at once and are still struggling to keep him down. Dude with taser then shoves taser against Jerry's testicles and says "Put your hands behind your back or your testicles are getting electrocuted." Jerry then magically complies with police officers."Destroyerpete95
Back to the 80s....
"Not me, but my dad who was a cop and is still a firefighter had one that I still laugh at. He was working a shift on the police department back in the early to mid 80s and got a call late one night for smoke showing from a residence. His assistant chief shows up first, I should preface by saying he was a fat and lazy fool and didn't properly check and radioed dispatch that there wasn't smoke showing and to disregard the fire department."
"My dad shows up and his AC tells him that it was a false alarm and my said he was going to check anyway. He said he smelled smoke as he got out of his cruiser and said he was going to check for himself."
"He opens the backyard fence and down the small hill to the back. As he walked to the back of the house he saw smoke pouring out of the soffits and saw flames in the back windows. He radios dispatch to have the fire department remain in route, and that smoke and flames visible and then asks for mutual aid from a neighboring department."
"Fire department shows up and was able to knock down the fire before it got too out of hand besides some serious smoke damage, but the house was eventually refinished and still stands to this day." fightinscot
"Drunk driving turned into man slaughter when he drove onto a side walk with OUTDOOR DINING."Wolf-man-420
He didn't make it.
"Not a cop, I'm a nurse but I was a vet tech at this time. I went to our main clinic for a meeting which was next to a liquor store. Watched a guy get out of his car, staggering all over the place, we just thought he was just another drunk getting more juice. Then he collapsed on the ground. My coworkers ran over to him and immediately started CPR. Turned out he had been sober for a year but had felt bad all day, he decided he had enough of feeling bad and was going to get a drink. Turned out he felt bad because he had had a heart attack and was in heart failure. He didn't make it."babyrn1
Frozen in Spot.
"Not an officer, but witness to a accident which turned into a drug and gun bust."
"Back when I was 18 I got into a bit of a blackjack habit at the local casino (Canada so only need to be 18). I walked out of there one night around 2:00 am, and was having a smoke outside my truck when I see this semi-old man walk across the street to the parking lot. He wasn't on the crosswalk, but like 20 meters or so from intersection. A vehicle came straight through the intersection (not speeding, driving perfectly normal) and this guy just froze like a deer in headlights. I imagine he was thinking that the car would swerve and avoid him. It was late at night so no one else was on the road, but with all the snow on the ground you simply cant break and steer the vehicle. It just locks up, and slides while turning sideways."
"The car hit the man, but relatively minor impact for a car hitting you. The side of the car hit the guy and the snow kind of helped soften the impact to the ground. I immediately called 911, the driver got out and started helping the man. After I run over, he says he needs to go call someone and goes to his car. No biggie, the man is shaken but no major injuries and I thought the driver was just really shook up from hitting someone. Police and ambulance get there a couple minutes later, tend to the man and the driver and I both give statements to different officers. I painted the guy in a good light, said he wasn't speeding and tried to break but the snow and ice made him slide. I'm waiting to be told that I'm good to go when an officer finds a fucking gun in a snow covered planter."
"The idiot driver took it out of his car, went and dropped it in a planter on the sidewalk and walked back over to his car on the road. Smart idea, but there's only one set of tracks that go from his car to this planter and then back, and an obvious hole in the fresh snow that's been piling up. He's arrested and they search the car. So yeah, he gets put in cuffs and into the cruiser. They search the car and I found out later they also convicted him for drug possession."
"Little did the cops know I also had a quarter ounce of weed in my truck."Syrinx16
arrest them all....
"Not a police officer, but have a story:"
"Once my dad was dating this woman who had a teenage son. The kid did not like my dad at all."
"One day, dad and his girlfriend got into a fight and my dad slept in the garage. He woke up to her son and two of his friends holding baseball bats around him. The kids beat up my dad and ran off.""
"My dad called the police to report the incident, but when the cops realized who my dad was, they arrested my dad on the spot for not paying child support to my mom.
"TL;DR, my dad called the cops on his girlfriend's son, ended up getting arrested."shaingel_sle
From the ELEVENTH floor.
"Not a cop but I guarantee the ones involved remember this one. They were originally there to arrest a guy selling drugs on campus. They passed me in the stairwell (on their way up) while I was going to borrow some notes from a classmate. A few minutes go by and I'm back in the stairwell and get passed by the same cops (on their way down and moving quick). Turns out they handcuffed the guy, sat him down, did God only knows what, while homeboy Superman out the window head first. From the ELEVENTH floor. So that was an interesting day. He lived and he's somehow not a vegetable."LilJamiLouWho
Don't be unruly at McDs!
"Not a cop... but as a McDs worker, we called 911 on a group of teens who came in drunk and unruly. We called because one of them was a little more drunk and tipsy and sat down, put his head down and passed out. His friends thought is was hilarious. Cops showed up with a smirk at first figuring it was just retarded teens. When they poured a little cold water on mr passed out and he did not flinch, they stopped smiling. When they looked at his medic alert bracelet they got REAL serious. Paramedics came and worked in the kid. He survived but nearly died. He was diabetic, and suffering alcohol poisoning, his blood sugar was WAY off. Cops said he would have died if we dod not call them. Seeing the cops go from smirks to serious like that was scary."Gouranga56
"Not me but my dad. Also wasn't a police officer at the time, but a constable. He was going to a guys house to serve him a summons, as is usual and routine. He got there and went up to the house and the guy answered. As he was talking to him and serving him the summons, the guy pulled out a gun. My dad pulled out his and told him to drop the gun. Instead, the guy then turned the gun on himself and pulled the trigger, blowing his own brains out. My dad was a cop before this though so it wasn't the first time seeing something like this."nilgoc
"Deputy friend of mine ended up getting hospitalized after responding to a call of a home intruder."
"There wasn't a home intruder, but there was a very large, aggressive turkey that bit him in the butt hard enough he needed stitches."slice_of_pi
Sheriff Deputy here.
"Sheriff Deputy here."
"During patrol I started noticing at one house that their packages being delivered at their front door weren't being taken inside. A lot of these packages were groceries. I also noticed their mail wasn't being brought in. Usually the postal service mentions something when they see this but I brought it upon myself to do a welfare check."
"I arrived at the door and knocked. No answer. I knocked a few more times, no answer. I started thinking maybe the person that lives there maybe gone for a while. I decided to take one peek through the front window and I saw an elderly woman laying on the ground."
"I announced to dispatch what I saw and I'm entering the house immediately. Luckily I didn't have to kick the front door down and instead discovered the back door was unlocked."
"I entered the house and the lady was alive but due to her older age, she wasn't able to stand back up on her own strength after falling and has been laying on the ground for 2 days. I got paramedics to arrive and take her to a nearby hospital. I found her phone book with personal numbers in her kitchen and called her adult children and notified them of what happened. They were very relieved and drove to the hospital to help care for her."FrankTheTank369
"Got a call of some lady refused to get out of the bathroom. It's around 2AM and the cleaning crew of a restaurant let her inside, but she didn't want to leave. It's raining and cold outside, I think it was January. We get there and another set of officers from a nearby precinct respond because it's boring when it's cold and raining."
"The lady comes out dressed in simple pajamas, no shoes or socks, holding an infant wrapped in a baby blanket. No jacket. No coat. No warm anything. Just button-down pajamas and her tiny infant. All of us are like/holdup. They aren't dressed for this weather at all. The mom looks pretty normal, as in she's not a transient. We learn later she's a brain surgeon and lives in a very swank condo. Turns out she walked 6-8 blocks down the street in the rain dressed like this."
"Then the mother displays behavior attributed to mental health disorders. Starts screaming "They" are trying to kill her, gets incredibly manic. Hunches down and her eyes go wild. But, she's holding that baby tight. We know she needs to go to a psych hospital, but we have to get the baby away first. We plead we want to help her, just let us hold the baby. She won't of course, because in her mind we're all trying to kill her."
"At one point she whispers (kind of spooky), "Give me a gun and I'll do it myself." We swarm her. Two for the baby and two on her and she's screaming bloody murder. It was unnerving to say the least."
"My partner and I took the call (report). We get a hold of dad and take the baby back to him. He didn't realize she had left. He's a doctor too. He mentioned she didn't want to take her psych meds anymore and hadn't taken them in about a week."
"Lesson learned: If you need psych meds, please TAKE your meds! Don't ever think you're all better without them."
"We took the mother to a psych hospital for a 72-hour eval. Hope she got back on her feet, but we don't know."No_Im_Random_Coffee
"It was a Saturday night and I had a call for an erratic vehicle (unable to stay in lane, speeding, etc.) Everyone assumed it was a routine dwi because it was Saturday night and started looking."
"Well she passed me on a main road so I turned around and conducted a traffic stop. She stopped her car in a terrible place so I approached on the passenger side. She was very angry and disrespectful and she wouldn't turn to look at me, just looked forward. I could smell alcohol, wasn't sure if it was coming from her or the vehicle. I asked for her license and registration to run her information. I decided I was going to talk to her more on the driver side to see if I could find signs of impairment."
"When I walked over to her side I saw the entire left side of her face was bruised and blood was coming out of her mouth, also a bruise on her neck in the shape of a hand and fingers. I had her step out to ask about it."
"She informed me her boyfriend got drunk and thought she was cheating on him and decided to hold her down by the neck and punch her approx 10 times. She had major swelling and the blood was a cut from her cheek against her teeth."
"It took 25 min to convince her to give me his information. She told me he lives in a neighboring state and the incident occurred there. I called the neighboring state police and informed them."
"Found out the guy had 3 felony warrants and they have been looking for him."SpikeFury47
He wasn't quick enough one time.Giphy
"It was dumb and routine BEFORE we got there...."
"It was a local, well-known, drunken criminal (jack of all trades) who was playing with fireworks."
"Not an uncommon thing."
"However, he was in his living room. And they were very powerful and illegal. He was entertaining himself by lighting the wick and putting it out."
"He wasn't quick enough one time. The mortar went through his roof. Blasted the storm door off the hinges into the front yard. His torso lacerated. Intestines needed to be pushed back in and sewn up."
"About a year later (almost to the day) he got in a fight with his girlfriend on the interstate highway. At some point they pulled over, he got out, doors were locked, so he climbed on the hood. She started driving and he fell off. Wasn't even in very bad shape. He was shirtless, of course, and I saw the surgery scars from the year prior."UFC_blackbelt
I got the opposite response here.....
"I got the opposite response here. Got a call that a woman was giving birth so me and a rookie head on over to the address. Rookie was super excited to get to help with this since he hadn't gotten the opportunity yet. So we pull up and his face drops. It's a 50 year old meth-ed up woman rolling and screaming in her grass saying that she's giving birth to a dog. Anyways, I tell my partner to heck on outta here and go help the woman deliver that dog. That call went from serious to pretty dumb very quickly."Fokouttahere
Where's My Sword?
"Dude broke into house, pretty standard burglary. Dude takes the home owner's katana and is playing with it as the guy returns home. The guy doesn't leave or call the police and proceeds to fight the guy who has his sword in a brawl. No one died but the burglar got a number done to him so he wasn't very good at sword skills ig."OriginSport
North Carolina Tales....
"There was this house she and her partner had to visit frequently for domestic disputes between a grown son and his wheelchair-bound father. It was never that bad, mostly just yelling and the neighbors would call the police to check on them. No charges were ever pressed, so they'd usually just check in and be on their way."
"They got another one of those calls one day thinking it'd be the same as usual, this time the son is waiting outside for them. The partner is still questioning the son, and thinking the old man wasn't gonna be a threat she goes inside to deal with him on her own. She announced herself and approached him to talk, he doesn't say anything but suddenly grabs for her gun. She pinned the gun and his hands to her side and tried punching him, pepper-spraying, anything she could think of to get him to let go. Eventually her partner heard her screaming and ran in to disarm him, and he was taken away. He later admitted he was gonna shoot her and then his son, and she was pretty shaken up after that."AllyMarie93
"I had a call on 911 from this guy who was very meandering and then it got really real."
"Hi, so like...I'm calling because there's this caaarrrr... I think it's a Taurus? Ford Taurus, I guess? Anyway, it's got one headlight on...I guess the other one's burnt out. And it's just...it's just running, with that one headlight on. Annnnnd it's in this parking lot for a commuuuunity center, y'know, but it's...it's...I think it's closed? So I guess it's like, what's this car, doing in this parking lot, right? Just one car in the parking lot...and it's on, and like, one headlight....oh yeah, and there'stwoguysinsideslumpedoverandthey'renotmoving"
"Turned out they were overdosing pretty hard."lazarus870
"The police and I were called to a public intoxication. No idea why medics were called but anyway..."
"The guy was hammered and had been stranded by his drinking buddies because he didn't want to get into the car (good for him). He was on the phone when I got there and he handed it to me and said "I can't talk to her", so I took the phone from him and hung it up and handed it back. Turns out he wanted me to talk to her for him (whoops)..."
"He went ballistic and threw a punch at me, and as he was punching the cop put a boot in his back (great reaction time, still don't know how he did it)."
"The guy ended up smashing his face on the road and suffered a concussion plus some other stuff. This was years ago and I still remember because I felt so guilty at the time."MapleDanish
These are some crazy stories! Do you have similar experiences to share? Let us know in the comments below.
People Break Down Which Practices The United States Needs To Adopt From Other Countries
We can all agree that there is something to appreciate about every country in the world, but there are arguably some countries that appear to have their ducks more consistently and happily in a row than others.
While it would be easy to let pride get in the way and continue to do things the same way, the more productive thing would be to learn from the countries who have figured out a better way to do certain things, whether it's healthcare, food banks, or other services.
Reflecting on the United States, Redditor Blinds**thead asked:
"What is one thing the USA should adopt from some other country?"
Introductions to Alcohol
"Swedish drinking laws. If I remember correctly, you can purchase alcohol below 5% at age 18, and be served liquor in bars (so the bartender can control the amount being served)."
"Seems like a smarter way to introduce kids to alcohol rather than opening the floodgates at 21."
Taxes to Approve
"I've never done them but they seem complicated and stress my parents out, so I just know I'll f**k mine up and end up in stupid jail, lol (laughing out loud)."
"Just send me something to sign, please!"
"A prison system that focuses on rehabilitation instead of punishment. Many countries have been successful with this saving literally billions of dollars and cutting down on crime."
Universal School Lunches
"Universal school lunches. It is embarrassing that we do not have folks cooking lunches for students from scratch and that it is not provided for free to all students."
"Do you want to bring your own lunch? Great, but you can also have the free hot lunch that looks homemade, not pizza squares, canned veggies, a slice of fruit, and 3 oz of milk."
"Kids shouldn't be going into debt for lunch. We're probably wealthy enough that our food waste alone would be sufficient, if captured magically, to feed every kid in the United States three proper meals per day."
"Also walkable cities and above-ground monorail systems."
"Finland has recently ended homelessness by just allowing people to live in small apartments without any preconditions, and four out of five of them make their way back to a stable life."
"It's also cheaper than allowing people to be homeless."
Foster Care Assistance
"It would be nice to also eliminate the fees foster parents pay for general registration, classes, and social services related to fostering or adoption."
"And also eliminate trying to recoup costs by billing parents whose children have been placed in foster care."
Longer Paid Family Leave
"I was SUPER blessed to get 12 weeks fully pay. But that’s not enough time. Putting the emotional aspect aside, I’ve returned to work functioning on four to five hours of sleep a night, and my productivity and cognitive abilities are greatly handicapped."
"My three-month-old son can’t even hold his head up or sit, let alone talk to tell me if anything’s wrong, and he’s placed in the care of someone else from 7:15 am to 5:15 pm. Doesn’t seem healthy for mother or child."
"The fact that our toilets don't have bidets and that at public restrooms the gap between the doors is massive, are both disgusting. Our whole bathroom situation is messed up."
Having a Siesta
"According to Dr. Andrew Huberman, whether you eat lunch or not, everyone requires a rest midday."
Tax Included in the Price
"Man, I had such a hard time with this when I visited America. Maths in my head is not my forte and I’m so used to looking at prices and expecting that to just be the price."
"I don’t get why you wouldn’t just add in the tax to the price. No one wants to do math unnecessarily. I mean, we don’t even tip in Australia so I don’t even need to work that out."
Raising Multilingual Children
"Teaching a foreign language to young students in public schools (ie 5yrs, k-5) when the propensity to learn the language quickly is maximum."
Clean Public Restrooms
"The clean restrooms in Japan were amazing. I never had to clean a toilet seat to put my young kids on it. In the states? Near every time. People here just don’t care about the ‘we’ when it comes to restrooms."
Separate Work and Healthcare
"Decent healthcare that isn't tied to your job. Other countries all over the world have figured out different ways to do this, so why can't we? (I know, corporations own politicians.)"
"I'm not an expert, but I'm guessing it would destabilize a bunch of industries in the near term. But I wonder if long-term, it would create so much new innovation since people would be unafraid to lose their health benefits to leave their stable but s**tty corporate jobs to start new ventures."
Designated Drivers on the Go
"In Japan, there is a service that you can call 24 hours per day that will come with two drivers and one car. One driver drives you and your car home, and the other follows in their car to pick up the driver that took you home with your car. No DUI, etc."
"It's actually really affordable there. No need to get an uber home that night and then an uber back the next day when you are hungover only to find out you have a million parking tickets or your car got towed."
Though there are positives to every country, it would be so cool to see each country be more open-minded about adopting the positives of other countries.
If a country is doing something better than another, the best thing for the citizens would be to take some notes, rather than let their pride do the talking.
Every year, at the end of the Academy Awards, while the auditorium erupts in cheers upon the announcement of the Best Picture winner, as they are somewhat obligated to do, many viewers at home instead shake their heads and raise their eyebrows.
That's if they don't throw popcorn or worse at their TVs.
While those who did so when La La Land was announced as the winner in 2017 would end up getting their revenge in what remains one of the biggest blunders of Oscar history, others are still reeling at some past winners, which they believe were more worthy of a Razzie than an Oscar.
Taste being subjective, plenty of people still find themselves confused by some films which won countless awards, received across-the-board raves, and are considered classics or masterpieces, but they find to be utterly unbearable.
Often finding themselves in an unpopular minority and having to keep their opinion to themselves, similar to Seinfeild's Elaine Benes and her unique disdain for The English Patient.
"Which film that’s universally praised do you find utterly repulsive?"
"My best friend really enjoys movies that make you anxious and uncomfortable like 'Uncut Gems' and 'Good Time', but I firmly do not like those kinds of movies."
"I know it's the point, but i find no joy in the level of discomfort I feel while watching them."
"Some other honorable mentions:"
Not Exactly Authentic
"'The Greatest Showman'."
"Mostly on the grounds that the real P T Barnum was a f*cking monster."- LostMercenary99
"The real John Smith was a f*cking sick bastard and the true events most definitely weren't a love story at all."- CagedKagepocahontas GIFGiphy
Who The "Devil" Was Is Debatable...
"'The Devil Wears Prada'."
"I just wanted everyone in that movie to die in a fire."- PothierM
Tearjerker, Or Sleeping Pill?
"I don't know if it's universally praised but I f*cking hate it."- sara_c907
One Of The All Time Creepiest Shower Scenes...
"Every damn Christmas."
"To be fair I can’t really stand Will Ferrel in general."- cook-isationwill farrel ross geller GIFGiphy
The Title Could Refer To The People Leaving The Theater...
"'Fast and Furious', just a terribly written extremely corny show."- tds542
Fern Gully Did It Better...
"All day long."
'Those blue miserable tw*ts."- akbarkhan666
There Was Bound To Be One...
"I don't know about utterly repulsive, but I have a hard time seeing why everyone loves 'Citizen Kane'."
"And I understand that there was movie making before 'Citizen Kane' and movie making after 'Citizen Kane' such that it informed movie makers going forward as to how it's done, let's say, but after a certain point we, the audience, don't see that anymore, and it's just another movie."
"And then I hear people say well it highlights social hierarchy under capitalism and such, but a lot of movies do that."
"And then there's the twist at the end which is not much of a twist which is the point, I suppose, but the whole thing seemed like a letdown when I finally watched it."
'As a result while a lot of people say it's their number one movie ever or at least in their top 10, it's on my top 10 list of movies not to watch again."- emjayseacitizen kane applause GIFGiphy
Why Not Just Do A Documentary?
"I think it's atrocious how they create hyperreality by over romanticizing the life of a famous person."
"Out of all the awful biopics however, i despise 'Bohemian Rhapsody' the most."
"The scene where the band supposedly invents 'We Will Rock You' on the spot makes my skin crawl."
"How did that movie end up winning so many awards, despite all the plot inaccuracy's and the poor editing."
"It is really beyond me."- Biemolt
Maybe Too Realistic?
'Not utterly repulsive, but I'm in the minority for thinking that 'Nomadland''s Best Picture win was a joke."
"It was barely a movie and relied too much on performance exploitation of actual people for its thin-as-f*ck narrative."
"Honestly, it might be my least favorite BP winner of recent times, yes I'd say that even 'Crash', 'The Artist' and 'Green Book' were better."- SamwisethePoopyButt
Not To Mention That Fake Baby...
"Shameless piece of 'Merican' propaganda, and I couldn't help but laugh at Bradley Cooper's portrayal in the first half hour."- mos_methBradley Cooper Baby GIFGiphy
Truman Capote Would Agree...
"Breakfast at Tiffany's."- LucyVialli
He Did Not Have Them At Hello...
"It was just TOO. DAMN. LONG."
"The 'Show me the money' bit was funny, but it happened early on in the film, and the rest dragged on forever."- Brilliant_Tourist400
We All Know "Moonlight" Was Better...
"'La La Land'."
"The music was utterly forgettable and the plot felt like it was written by a bunch of Hollywood executives jerking each other off."- Aviator506Emma Stone Love GIF by La La LandGiphy
Needless to say, everyone's taste is different, and everyone is entitled to their opinion.
Meaning there's bound to be an argument at the next "movie night" you have with friends over whether to watch Citizen Kane or Spice World.
And you should feel no shame in expressing which movie you want to watch.
Or rather, "what you really, REALLY, want" to watch...
Everyone wishes there was something different about their body.
Smaller nose, longer legs, a different hair or eye color.
There are those, however, whose frustrations with their body are less personal, and more universal.
Finding themselves frustrated less with their own DNA, but with human anatomy in general.
Frustrated by how certain functions work the way they do, and feeling there could be significant improvements in other departments as well.
"What is the biggest design flaw of the human body?"
Would Make A Lot Of People Less Cautious
"Unable to regenerate body parts."
"You lose an arm or a leg, you can't grow a new one."
"We can grow hair and nails forever, but not body parts."- drygnfyre
And Maybe The Whole Childbirth Process While We're At It...
"The size of the average baby head vs the size of the average vagina."- Ruggiard
"The Obstetric Dilemma."
"Basically, the human body isn't built for easy birth."- strykazoidSeason 3 Baby GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy
It Isn't Terribly Practical If You Think About It...
"IMO the whole 'we put food into the only air hole we have and can choke and die if we aren’t careful' thing is a pretty big miss."- el_rico_pavo_real
"Throat has a built in flaw - we breath n swallow food through the same area."- coolguy1793B
A More Direct Route Would Be Helpful
"I like the example of the recurrent laryngeal nerve."
"It runs from the brain to the larynx."
"However, to get there it goes from the brain, down the neck, into the chest, around the aorta and then back up the chest, up the neck and then connects to the larynx."
"That's a massive detour."
"It also means a blow to the chest can damage your ability to talk."- The_Thunder_ChildGiphy
Never Underestimate The Damage Teeth Can Do
"The fact that I sometimes accidentally eat the inside of my mouth."- -Grey_Area-·
He Does Have A Point
"'Nostalgia is the greatest human weakness. Second only to the neck'... -Dwight Schrute
In Plain Sight...
"In our eyes, the blood vessels supplying our photoreceptors are in front of them and therefore in the way of the incoming light."
"Probably not the biggest and there are some good justifications for it being set up this way."
"But it still must be such a pain for the brain constantly having to edit these out when forming our visual experience."- oliwoggleLoop Eyes GIF by Doze StudioGiphy
Maybe Just Every Illness And Ailment?
"My aunt had one when she was 31 and the healthiest person in the world."
"Ran an aerobics class at the Y, just perfect perfect health."
"Went to Pizza Hut with her the night before, next day, massive stroke, almost died, critical surgery, twenty years later she still has trouble speaking."
"There is no reason that should’ve happened."
"Perfectly healthy person damaged for the rest of her life."
"She’s still amazing and lovely and my favorite person but damn is that annoying."- Jibber_Fight
"You can kinda just die at any moment from a brain aneurysm, even if you're perfectly healthy."- mcsteve87
All Our Bones Could Be Stronger...
"For upright walking creatures, why is our head so (relatively) delicate?"
"Trip a single time and you're blinded, have brain damage, bit off your tongue, or lost teeth."- kmn493Episode 15 Pain GIF by The SimpsonsGiphy
They Arguably Also Weren't Built For Stairs...
"Our knees for sure."
"They just weren't built to last past 40 years."- TopShelfCrazy
A Couple More On/Off Switches Would Be Helpful As Well...
"That we cannot delete or sort unwanted/not needed info and memories from our brains."- PickAName616
As the saying goes, "nobody's perfect."
Or rather, "no BODY is perfect."
Otherwise, we'd all stop complaining about aching limbs or worrying about choking or other injuries.
People Share The Absolute Worst Relationship Advice They've Ever Received
Relationships are hard, and sometimes, they're confusing. When you're having a problem with your partner, or you're inexperienced and looking for lessons, you turn to your friends and family for advice.
Sometimes, the advice is sound and helps make things better.
Other times, the advice is trash and makes everything worse.
Redditors know this all too well, and are sharing the worst relationship advice they've ever gotten.
It all started when Redditor Spectrelegit asked:
"What is the worst relationship advice you've ever heard?"
Loyal As A Dog
"Any "loyalty tests". Always a bad idea."
"Heard a youtube therapist once say that as soon as you decide to do a loyalty test, you've already decided the relationship is over because either they fail and you can't trust them, or they pass and you show them that you don't trust them and they stop being able to trust you"
"Ultimatums fall under a similar category."
"If this is a current situation it sounds pretty toxic, and if you are unhappy I hope you get the support you need to make any changes."
Diamonds Are A Girl's Best Friend
"Spend 3 months salary on an engagement ring. This was literally started by the rich diamond families to increase sales."
"My girl literally threw a jewelry store book at me with the ring she wanted circled and happily said there was a coupon lol. It was like $80 but it's the one she wanted. We've been together for almost 10 years and happily married for nearly 3 now"
"Yeah it's ridiculous, there's lab created gems that are basically the same and a fraction of the cost."
"I’ve said this to friends and family several times when they’ve asked me while stressing about picking out expensive rings:"
"if the ring is the problem, then the ring is not the problem."
Not The Way To Go
"There was a Reddit post about a guy who told his partner that she stunk several times a day. Poor girl was horrified. It got to the point that she was showering incessantly, using industrial strength deodorants and he still complained non-stop."
"Paraphrasing here, but when finally confronted, it turns out his father had given him this sound advice: “Tell a women she smells bad, and she’ll never leave you.”"
"Daddy was wrong."
Anything Doesn't Go
"That you only truly care if you're "ride or die.""
"An ex once told me that she thought if she pushed me far enough that I'd leave. I told her "Yes, I would leave. Why would I want to be with someone who thought so little of me that they'd push me far enough?""
"I had put up with a lot of abusive behaviour from her and it didn't last much longer before she tested my statement and I did exactly what I said."
"Totally!! And that you should love your partner “unconditionally” ie any behaviour goes. Nope"
Maybe Not The Right Person To Ask
"A friend of mine once prefaced some unsolicited advice about my 10-year marriage with the phrase, "I've been in dozens of relationships..." and then he went on to rant about how men shouldn't do the grocery shopping or something stupid like that."
"Right, we had a three times divorced friend who loved to give relationship advice. Most of it was BS."
"The Children" Need A Good Example
"Stay together for the kids."
"I was the child. Please don’t."
"I was also the child. Your children know when you don’t love each other, when you’re fighting all the time because you decided to stay with someone you can barely tolerate. They will live with that knowledge and grow up with a warped perception of love and relationships because they were never given a proper example."
"They will either become obsessive and do whatever they can to make someone stay, or they’ll develop a fear of commitment that will ruin every relationship before they even get the chance to try it. Divorce can be messy, especially when kids are involved, but sometimes the alternative can be far worse. If you decide to have kids, do right by them."
"“There is a perfect person out there”"
"No. No there isn’t. There is no such thing. People change as they experience life. To believe someone will stay the same forever is silly. Pick someone who you can grow with and shares common values with you. Everyone has to make some compromises and that includes someone making them on you too."
Not A Great Justification
"Being married is like eating spaghetti every night for dinner. No matter what sauce you put on it, it's still spaghetti. Sometimes a man needs to eat some steak once in a while."
"That was from my dad while trying to justify cheating on my mom."
Look Good For You
"My (very attractive but very unhappy in her own marriage mother) tried to make me believe that the secret of a successful marriage is to look desirable at every hour of the day and night . Make up, clothes, perfume… anything to keep the husband interested. Having a personality is nice but not necessary."
"I feel guilty of this, although I also feel like I can take the time to get ready all I want, he’s still going to admire someone else and probably in front of you. Just get ready for yourself if it makes you feel better. I have always hated to go out in public to run into anyone bareface, whether it’s an old friend, someone who picked on me in school, an old crush."
"Not sure where it came from me being this way but growing up my parents made fun of me when I’d have no make up on. If I got bad grades or did something that upset them they’d take it away and give it back saying “I need it.” Then other days tell me I wear too much of it, like high school wasn’t enough already. I could never win."
"I know several people who believe this and it’s sad"
Don't Be Who You Are
"When I was a teenager, my mom told me to not let boys see I was smart because no man is attracted to a woman whose smarter than he is. Also, I should work on my laugh because no one would be attracted to my laugh."
"Being smart and passionate about your interests is the most attractive thing ever"
Tell Me I'm Right
"Most people that come to you for relationship advice don’t want to advice they want you to validate the terrible decision they are about to make."
"I think your statement applies to advice in general. A lot of people to want to actually change or put in effort, they just want validation for their choices."
Yeah, that tracks.
We cannot believe some folks are dishing out such advice!
Has anyone every told you something truly crazy to keep a relationship propped up? Let us know in the comments.