Visiting Santa is a rite of passage for millions of children every year. That's a whole lot of Santas and a whole lot of requests for the big guy.
Reddit user _sleepykitten_ asked:
Former "Santas" of Reddit, what was the strangest or sweetest thing a child asked Santa for Christmas?
4,500 former Santas (and children) shared their stories. Here are the best of them.
Still Working
When I was little I asked for a wishing bone. There is an old wives tale that if you crack it you get a wish. Child me believed this. I figured if I got a wishing bone for Christmas that physical gift would mean I could get a wish instead! A wish was obviously less constrained than a present, which had to be physical. I did get my wishing bone too. I wished to be invincible. Haven't died yet either, so who is to say it didn't work. hollth1
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End of Innocence
My seven year old just asked me, if I pretend to still believe in Santa, will he give me more presents? Guyutestash
Acceptance
I was a Santa for developmentally disabled adults, one of them climbed on my lap and said "I want to be normal". mushbo
Where Babies Don't Come From
I was Santa at Rainforest Cafe once a few years back and a little girl asked me if I had a sister factory because her mom and dad wanted to make one but can't. I told her that I cant make people and she immediately bawled her eyes out with the most ear-splitting screech you'd ever heard. rajjjjjj
Weiner Wishes
My cousin told a mall santa he wanted a hot dog for Christmas. SteamPawn
Not Battleship?
A buddy of mine's son asked Santa for the board game operation a few years ago by saying "I want the operation". The guy playing Santa got real concerned and looked up at my buddy and asked what kind of operation. My buddy hadn't really connected the dots and just said something like "Uhhhhh Mattel I think." Then when they walked away it dawned on him why Santa had spent so much time with his kid. 7fingersphil
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Concession Food is Expensive
I wrap presents at the mall as a fundraiser for my local animal rescue. We sit right outside of where Santa is so I talk to the kids afterward and ask them what they asked for.
A silly one that stuck with me from last year, from an absolutely adorable 5 year old little girl: "A trip to Disney world..."
And with a thoughtful look on her face: "...and Taco Bell gift cards." kaunis
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Creepy Christmas Critters
Had a nine year old girl ask for worms for Christmas, looked up at her parents and they just kinda shrugged so I went with it and told her I'd see what I could do. lnadoo
Gamer Gift
When I was about 15 I had to sub in for our church's Santa because he was sick. First kid without missing a beat asked if I could get his daddy to stop beating him at (the game) Tekken for Christmas. basedonfacts
Considerate Dog Lover
I was the kid and I hear this story all the time. When I was 6 I asked Santa to convince my parents to let me get a dog. He asked why convince them and I told him it would be unfair to have a dog just show up, that we all had to pick it out together so everyone would be happy. Apparently my mom almost cried over that. Still had to wait 3 years before getting my dog though. Narryaworry
Chicks Dig It
I was Santa at my friends store a few years ago. A little boy sternly asked me for a mustache. Awesomepolice
Cool!
My stepdad was a Disneyland santa and a kid asked for a penguin and he asked where the kid would keep it and she said "in the freezer." buhnahnuh
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Bronies Were Not a Thing Yet
Older brother here. I was 5 and my sister was 4. We both sat in Santa's lap together and my sister just froze.
I felt like I had to cover for her so I told Santa my stuff and then said I wanted a My Little Pony to try and get my sister to snap out of it. She was still too scared and didn't say anything so Santa just looks at me like, "My Little Pony, wtf?"
Still glad I tried to get my sis some presents tho. jinspin
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Daddy's Girl
My daughter, two weeks ago, she said she wants to ask santa that I never get old.
I asked why ?
She said like that I can always remain handsome. Jess_Pinkman
Watch the World Burn
"Fire". I shit you not, the kid looked me right in the eyes and said "Fire". When I joyfully asked, "What do you mean by that?" He looked me dead in the eyes and said "I want Fire."
Last I looked there is no game, or form of entertainment called Fire, and this kid looked like he could be the Antichrist. timtheblueman
Selfless
My dad did Santa for a couple years but had to stop because of the emotional toll it took on him. He was doing it at a poor area mall and the kids would come and ask for jackets and things like that for their siblings or parents and nothing for them. orange_lazarus1
Fish Kill
An old coworker of mine was a volunteer Santa. A five year old boy climbs onto his lap, and my friend asks what the boy wants for Christmas. The boy exclaims "I want an orange goldfish!".
My friend glances over at the mom, who gives him the thumbs up, so he smiles and tells the boy that he'll make sure it goes on the list. But the boy worriedly leans closer and says:
Boy: Santa, you have to bring the fish in water, okay? Fish need water to live!
Friend: ~chuckles~ The fish will come with water, I promise!
Boy: And you have to feed it! They sell fish food at Walmart.
Friend: Uh, okay. The elves will make sure-
Boy: And you can't leave it in the sleigh! It will FREEZE AND DIE!
Friend: Don't worry, nothing will happen to the fish.
Boy: And it can't stay in the bag because it won't have air.
Friend: I have many requests for fish, and they've all gone to their homes safely. Don't worry-
Boy: You don't understand! You're magic! Animals need food and water and air!
Friend: Uh...
Boy: ~jumps off Santa's lap, very exasperated~ MOM, SANTA'S GOING TO KILL MY FISH. waytoomanychoices
It's a Sure Sign
My dad was a "signing" Santa in his young 20s. Fluent in ASL and needed some extra cash during the holidays. They would have a special day where all the deaf kids would be able to come and sit on Santa's lap and sign what they wanted for Christmas. He would always recall how amazing it was that the kids were never surprised, excited, or in awe that Santa could sign. It was a given; of course Santa signs, it's Santa. isowseeds123
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Green Christmas
When my son was 4 he asked Santa for Asparagus because it was his favorite food (I kid you not).
He of course woke up on Christmas morning to a bundle of Asparagus wrapped in a bow (among his other gifts of course) I mean, what choice did we have? Ask and ye shall receive! Laszerus
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Better to Give Than Receive
Back around 1990 I played Santa one time for my high school's Beta club or Octagon club, can't remember which - they were doing a Christmas dinner for disadvantaged children the week before Christmas. One little boy asked me for a Nintendo and I said "I'll see what I can do", and then a few kids later, his older sister came up and said "I don't want anything, but could you get my little brother a Nintendo? He wants one so bad." - It broke my heart so bad I almost started crying right then and there.
I asked if I could keep the Santa suit for a few more days, and Christmas day, I found out where they lived and got all my friends to donate any old games/equipment/accessories they didn't play anymore and gathered up about 25 games, a Nintendo, power-pad, light gun, power glove and sensors, and all the cables to hook it up, and one parent donated a 27 inch TV. I drove up to their house in that Santa suit, in my purple firebird (lol, it was hard to explain where the reindeer were) and gave that little boy a Nintendo.
I'd never seen a child so happy and I was trying my best not to cry with his mother, she was that mix of happy, excited, crying, covering her face, and couldn't stop thanking me. I hooked up everything and got the kids started with it and explained how everything worked and how to hook it up and they were just so amazed that Santa brought them all that and stayed all afternoon to play with them.
Because his older sister was so selfless and gave up her wish to him, we rounded up enough to get her a pink and purple bike with the streamers on the handlebars, and one of those Barbie camper playsets. She thanked me so sweetly for her presents and thanked me for her little brother's Nintendo. I tear up every time I think about it. pcliv
Santa on Vacation
I have not shaved in a few years. My now 24 year old son asked on his 21st birthday that I not shave and grow my beard out to see what would happen. Think of the Star Trek five year mission.
I now look like Santa, a Duck Dynastian, or a homeless person.
I was wearing a Hawaiian shirt and a pair of cargo shorts and a young girl around 5 to 7 years of age approached me in a department store and said, "Santa, I will be good forever if you could find my mom."
They had gotten separated in the store. I saw a woman trying to hook up with a guy not far away, but the child was not tall enough to see her.
I basically guilted that woman into buying her daughter something.
I now volunteer as Santa for sick children who are in the hospital at Christmas. santapoet
Awkward
Santa for a kid's party my Navy command threw one year. One girl asked for her real daddy not to come back from deployment, because the one that stayed there while he was gone was a lot nicer.
I... err... johnnyseattle
Job Satisfaction
I am Santa 7 days a week from the weekend before Thanksgiving through Christmas Eve. I have heard all kinds of stuff. I had a child ask me for a single stick of gum because his mom wouldn't allow him to have any. Had a girl ask for a box of Frosted Flakes for the same reason. I've had a child ask me to bring her daddy home from Afghanistan. I've posed with the portrait of a child who had just passed away a month prior. There have been children who have asked for live chickens and live pigs. One day I really need to write all of these down. One thing I can say, it's usually never boring. broberts69
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For many childhood memories are overrun by living nightmares.
Yes, children are resilient, but that doesn't mean that the things we see as babes don't follow us forever.
The horrors of the world are no stranger to the young.
Redditor -2sweetcaramel- wanted to see who was willing to share about the worst things we've seen as kids, so they asked:
"What’s the creepiest thing you saw as a kid?"
Serious Danger
"Me and my best friend would explore the drainage tunnels under the Vegas area where we grew up. These were miles long and it was always really cool down there so it was a good way to escape the heat of our scorching hot summers. We went into this one that goes under the Fiesta casino and found a camp with a bunch of homeless people."
"Mind you we are like 11 years old lol. And we just kept going like it was nothing. It wasn’t scary then but when I look back at it we could have been in some serious danger. Our parents had no idea we did this or where we were and we had no cellphones. We could have been kidnapped and never have been found."
oofboof2020
Waiting for Food
"I was at a portillos once when I was 12 and I was waiting with my little brother at a booth while my parents got our food. This guy was standing with his tray kind of watching me then after a couple of minutes he started to walk over really fast not breaking eye contact with me."
"He was 2 feet from the table and my dad came out of nowhere and scared the s**t out of him. He looked so surprised and just said he wanted to see if I’d get scared or not. He left his tray full of food near the door and left. My folks reported him but we never went to that location again since we found a better one closer to home."
nowhereboy1964
Captain Hobo to the Rescue
"When I was a pretty young teen, my friends and I were horsing around in San Francisco and started hanging out to smoke with some homeless guys. Another homeless dude came up and began aggressively trying to shake us down for anything (money, smokes, a ride, drugs- all of it) and wouldn’t take no for an answer."
"We got in over our heads and could tell this guy was now riling the other 2 guys up and they were acting like they wanted to jump us. Some grandfather-looking old homeless man appeared out of nowhere and yelled at us to get the f**k out of here- nice kids like us don’t belong down here at this hour!!"
"Captain Hobo saved our lives that night. My parents sincerely thought we were at a mall all day lol."
FartAttack911
Survival
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"I was 7 and survived the 2004 tsunami in Thailand. Witnessed the wave rise way above the already massive palm trees (approx. 40ft?) and my family and I watched/heard the wave crash into the ground from a rooftop."
faithfulpoo
These Tsunami stories are just tragic.
On the Sand
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"We were a group of kids who went to swim in a local lake. And there was a dead body on the beach with their hands raised and their legs bent unnaturally that local police just took out of the same lake. I've never put my foot in these waters again."
oyloff
Be Clever
"I was walking to school and I was about 5 or 6 years old and some guy pulled up beside me in his car and asked if I would get in. He also offered me sweets to do so. I said no. The creepy bit was when he calmly said ‘clever boy’ to me, then drove off. I’ve never even told my parents or anyone else about this as it would most likely freak them out."
OstneyPiz
Bad Jokes
"Dad's side of the family pranked me by burying a fake body on our back property and had me dig it up to find valuables. Was only allowed to use a lantern for light. They stuffed old clothes with chicken bones. Sheetrock mud where the head was... Random fake jewelry as the treasures... I was like maybe 10 or 11.. I remember digging up the boot first and started gagging because it became real at that point."
Alegan239
YOU
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"Woke up to find my little brother staring at me in the dark, asking, Are you really you?"
PrettyLola2004
Siblings can really be a bunch of creepers.
No one should talk to others in the dark though.
Not all pet owners have the same relationship with their pets.
While anyone who decides to become a pet owner, or pet parent as some say, love their pets equally, some never ever let them leave their side.
Taking their pet with them to work, running errands, even on vacations.
Many pet parents even allow their pets to share their bed with them when going to sleep.
For others though, this is where a line is finally drawn.
Redditor Piggythelavasurfer was curious to hear whether pet owners allowed their pets to share their bed with them, as well as the reasons why they do/don't, leading them to ask:
"Do you let your pet sleep in your bed? Why/why not?"
The Tiny Issue Of Water...
"Absolutely not."
"I have fish."- Senior-Meal3649
Everyone Gets Lonely Eventually...
"I adopted an eleven year old cat the day before Halloween."
"She has mostly lived in my closet since I got her, and she hasn’t been too interested in coming out."
"Last night, she came out of my closet and jumped up on my bed, and crawled under my covers and curled up by my feet to sleep."
"I was so happy!"- YellowBeastJeep
The Comforting Reminder That You're Not Alone...
"I recently lost my Greyhound but I used to let him sleep on my bed with me."
"The company was nice and he was no trouble to have on my bed."- HoodedMenace3
Hungry Cookie GIF by De Graafschap Dierenartsen
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What Do You Mean Allow?
"I have no choice."
"She is a cat, cats do whatever they want."- Small_cat1412
"He lets me sleep in my bed."- Poorly-Drawn-Beagle
Wouldn't Have It Any Other Way
"I carry my old boy upstairs to bed every night."- worst_in_show
Hug GIF by The BarkPost
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Who Needs An Alarm Clock?
"I let my two cats sleep with me."
"They're so full of love and just want cuddles all the time."
"And so do I."
"We've all developed a lil routine."
"Get to bed, oldest sleeps on my feet to keep them warm, youngest lies in my arm while I lie on my side (she the little spoon), then when I snooze my alarm for work in the morning the youngest paws at my face and meeps loudly to wake me up."- GhostofaFlea_
Whose Bed Is It Anyway?
"Yes."
"They're also kind enough to let me squeeze into whatever space they've left for me."
"Although I do get a few dirty looks off them."- Therealkaylor
"I found this tiny kitten screaming her head off under a car."
"Would not come out."
"Got some food and some water in dishes."
"I stood by the tire so she couldn't see my feet."
"She got curious about the food and water and started gobbling it down."
"I thought she would bolt when I squatted down."
"She was too busy eating."
"I grabbed her by the nape of the neck and all four legs went straight out and she tried to scratch me to death."
"I got her in the door and tossed her toward the couch."
"She ricocheted off the couch as if she was a ping pong off a table and I lost sight of her."
"I put out food and water and a sandbox and did not see that kitten for three days."
"On the third day, I came home and she was on my bed pillow."
"I thought she would bolt when I came near, but she didn't."
"I wanted to sleep so I tried to scoot her little butt off my pillow."
"She would not go."
"I put my head down to sleep and that is the way it was from then on."
"She ran the roost."- Logical_Cherry_7588
sleepy kitten GIF
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Sleeping Is A Prerequisite...
"No, he's a cat and he cannot keep still during the night."
"He walks across the headboard, opens the closet doors, jumps into the windows and rustles the blinds, etc."
"If he would sleep he could stay, but alas, he's a ramblin' man."- Spong_Durnflungle
Saying No Just Isn't An Option...
"'Let'."
"Lol."
"It's a cat's world and I'm happy to be on her good side."- milaren
Felines Only!
"The cat does, the dog doesn't and the horse certainly does not either."- Xcrowzz
Angry Tom And Jerry GIF by Boomerang Official
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Is That My Hair On That Pillow?
"My dog is perfect."
"She comes up, cuddles til we start to fall asleep, then gets down to sleep on her bed so she doesn't get too hot."
"Jumps back up in the early morning for wake up cuddles."
"The hair everywhere is the only downside but she is so cozy, what can you do."- HoodieWinchester
It is easy to understand how some people are able to fall asleep more easily knowing their friend and protector is there, in bed, with them.
Though we can't blame others who don't want to run the risk of being scratched or bitten in the middle of the night either...