Some jobs people just take for granted. They look at them and think, "this is so easy", but in reality, they don't know s**t. Things can be way harder than they look, and you will never truly know until you attempt it yourself.
u/FatBeforeFact asked: What's a lot harder than people actually think?
Quitting just about any bad habit you've had for a long time.
5 1/2 years smoke free. Hardest thing I've ever done.
Relationships are HARD.Giphy
Maintaining a healthy, loving relationship.
People think it's always pretty easy, but it involves juggling a lot of plates together to make things work.
This is so true! Most people think that love just happens to you and if you fall out of love then you just move on and find someone new. But there are stages to love and after you get through the initial hot and heavy stage, it takes work to maintain it. You have to make time for each other and actively work to create a loving relationship together.
Sad, but true.
Finding worthwhile friends.
The other side of that challenge is striving to be someone that worthwhile people want to be friends with.
Going to the gym. I don't mean working out itself, I mean the actual act of coming home tired after work and forcing yourself to go to the gym. Physically getting there is so psychologically taxing. It actually wears on me throughout the day at work, especially if it's a tough day at the job.
Main reason why I started doing gym in the mornings. Now, if I could just get used to waking up super early to go workout...
It's all about technique.Giphy
My first Brazilian Jiu Jitsu class I recall thinking "I'm a big strong guy, I know how to fight, I'll be ok at this"
Nope. Nope nope, just no.
A tiny older lady proceeded to mess my world up. I still have no idea how she stood on my face and threw me at the same time, but I was bottom over teakettle the entire roll.
My first striking class "well BJJ was tough, but I did karate as a kid, I can throw a punch and kick; besides my conditioning is better now. I'll be fine"
More nope nope!
Cue scrawny kid lighting me up, bruised for days and I'm convinced that I was kicked in the side while holding pads hard enough to cause brain damage.
Being good at fighting is hard. Aggression, strength and size can carry some people quite a ways, but goddamn there are some hidden monsters out there.
I'm sure that's not what you meant.
Exposing yourself. Emotionally speaking, not like swinging your d**k around, though I imagine many would also have difficulty with that as well.
"If we want the rewards of being loved we have to submit to the mortifying ordeal of being known," - Tim Kreider
i.e: if you're too shy to take your pants off you'll never get any decent action.
Maintaining conversations with people. Most of the time, small talk would happen; it's absolute drivel.
I used to have the same problem, then I decided to learn communication skills by doing door to door sales. The key is to try to avoid asking simple questions that have simple answers, like yes or no answers or so forth. Instead ask open ended questions that require the other person to activate their brain to answer.
"What are you passionate about?" "What are 3 things you like about your current job?"
Don't just ask them what they do for a living because that will give you a flat one or two word response. Instead ask them what they do and then expand on it. "Oh, you're a teacher? If you could change one thing about your school day what would it be?" That should get the gears moving. Open ended questions are key.
That's the only way to learn.Giphy
Reading and writing. Think about it, it takes years of direct instruction before you are minimally literate and you continually learn vast amounts of words into your late 20s.
The fact that most people know how to do it to any level obscures the challenge.
If anyone disagrees with this, learn a foreign language. It really puts into perspective how incredibly difficult, complex, and nuanced communication is.
This happens a lot, unfortunately.
Leaving an abusive relationship. People always say stuff, like "Why doesn't she/he just leave him/her?", but it rarely is as easy as this. Maybe this person still has some feeling for that persons.
Quite often the domestic violence victim is really afraid of the perpetrator and fears that the abuser might beat them up badly or even try to kill them when they leave. They also might, completely wrongly, believe after awhile that they did something wrong and the beatings are justified.
I have found in verbally abusive relationships that the person who is being abused thinks that, that is how relationships work, or oh I can fix him/her. It can get really bad when people on the outside keep telling you to break up with that abusive person, but no one likes to be told how to date, and sometimes double down and try to prove everyone wrong.
I know this because I went through this myself. People can just live in denial, and think that there isn't anything better for them because they have little to no self esteem.
An important lesson.
Recovering from multiple broken broken bones.
I broke 15 bones of my mountain bike a month ago. I was just cleared by the doctor to start being able to walk. It's like you forget how to walk and even though you think you remember you are not strong enough to walk. It's even worse for me because I broke my left wrist and collar bone so I can't even use crutches...
The lesson I learned from this is always be careful because one wrong move and you could change your life.
Acting. I have studied acting now for six years, and it is still so complicated. It is not remembering lines, it's emotion, reaction, character, voice, breath, emphasis, memory, a knowledge of human behaviour, body language, and even knowledge on how to build tension or enhance claustrophobia.
Working in retail. When I was 15 I got my first part time job during school as a "check out chick" and I thought it was super easy. I was also a bit of an arrogant kid just because I had good grades at school and thought "this is gonna be super easy."
I almost had a breakdown on my first shift. They gave me no help, I was distraught at how fast adults moved their groceries along the belt and a these different payment methods etc. I had no clue on what half the vegetables were called (I only knew things I ate like carrot, broccoli etc) BUT NOT 9 different TYPES OF APPLES AND MANGOES. Customers were condescending and I had no idea what half the buttons did or how to do certain things and no one told me, I also had severe social anxiety at the time and wasn't used to talking to strangers.
It took me over half a year to finally be fully on my feet. Even then, I felt almost no confidence in my ability to do my job properly and also had to learn from each bad experience I had (e.g a customer would get mad if I didn't know how to do something right - because apparently they were perfect at their first job). Packing groceries and speed were also a nightmare for me because different customers liked different packing styles and different weights.
Anyway, it's been almost 2 years now and I have turned from a little anxious hermit into a very outgoing and cheery person who enjoys making customers' days better. It's also worth noting that I've certainly humbled out and have learned to appreciate every single job and person around me and that I am not the centre of the universe as I had been when I was a child. Heck, it even inspired me to use my education to hopefully get into med school because I both enjoy learning about medicine and interacting/ assisting with everyday people.
Anyway, long story short: Every job is harder than it looks - no matter the wage etc. Next time you feel like attacking a retail assistant - think of how you'd like to be in that position with no experience.
At peak condition, or through electric Stimuli, your muscles can tense to a point where they can withstand being hit by a baseball bat and could even break it.
You just blew my mind if this is true!
A good method.....maybe.Giphy
Getting motivation to study. Sometimes you really want to study, but when you finally come to it, you procrastinate, or get distracted. It's really hard to have a study properly. My advice? Irregular sleeping hours.
Obviously this might not work if you have school early in the morning, but during holidays, you may want to choose to sleep in the afternoons or in the mornings, and study at night instead. At night, no one is awake and everything is quiet, perfect.
I do this constantly and it's not really affecting my health. Just remember to change up your sleeping cycle a day before you have school so you don't get affected too badly by this habit.
No easy feat.
Pole Dancing. You wont look sexy after taking a one hour class. It's been over two months and I'm still waiting for the sexy to show up.
Life hacks, as defined by Urban Dictionary, are, "A tool or technique that makes some aspect of one's life easier or more efficient."
Reddit, what are your best lifehacks?
Most life hacks are meant to make things smoother in your daily routine, making sure you are never caught with your pants down.
Turns out sometimes it's also making sure you straight up just have pants.
Keeping An Extra Set Handy
"Back when I was 18-26, I always had one full bag packed in my car. It generally had clean underwear, a t-shirt or two, jeans, shorts, flops, and toothbrush/deodorant. I can't tell you how many times I'd just meet up with some friends and next thing you know it was 2AM and I needed a place to sleep. Having everything with me was awesome."
"Slightly different structure to mine, but I do something similar. Under the back seat of each of my trucks I have a roll of clothes. T-shirt, pair of jeans, socks, and undies. The difference is, instead of a bag, I have it tightly wrapped up in stretch wrap. Its like kitchen saran wrap but we use it in receiving to wrap bundles / pallets. The benefits are it keeps it super compact and effectively watertight. The times I've had to crack one open often have been because my current clothes got either soaked or dirty working, so nice and dry was a huge benefit."
Having It All Ready The Night Before
"Make lunch for work the night before."
- Groceries are way cheaper than eating out every day -- screw anyone who thinks you're lame because you don't have a Timmyho bagel or BK for lunch everyday. I'm saving 4-5$ per meal
- Not making lunch the morning makes the morning that much smoother.
"Also, putting socks on before pants. I believe the quote from the OP was something like socks are pant lubricants. Believe it."
Stomping Along The Work Of Others
"Here is a lifehack for all of the students out there. If you are charged with writing a lengthy research paper, find one very solid source that directly pertains to your thesis, and then you can use that source's bibliography to back into locating new sources."
"One of my professors calls this "raping the bibliography" and says that it's perfectly acceptable and done all the time in academia. Furthermore, you're under no obligation to credit the source you used to find the bibliography unless you use something directly in that article. Last, but not least, they have already written out the bibliography entry for you!"
A big swath of life hacks are all about speeding things along, with the intention of making your day go smoothly thus leaving you more free time for your hobbies and interests.
Keep The Closet Clear
"Putting my clothes in my closet with the hangers reversed once a year. As I pull clothes out, I reverse the hanger. Every year I give away any clothes that I never took out."
"I do something similar. I put all the clothes I hang up each week on the left side of the closet, with each week sliding everything right to make room. Eventually the stuff I dont wear makes its way to the right. thats the stuff I ditch."
Can't Leave Home Without It
"When you need to remember to bring something with you, put your car keys on it the night before..."
Here's A List!
- If there's something I need to do but am procrastinating, I find something else I also need to do that's even more of a chore. I can then put off doing the second thing by doing the first.
- I set up automatic bill payment for everything. I don't remember precisely when those payments will go out. The fear of a bounced check or declined payment keeps me from getting too close to a zero balance.
- Anything I need to remember, I write down.
- Anything I need to take with me goes near the keys or the shoes.
- I used to have my computer set up to start playing a specific iTunes playlist on the stereo at a certain time. The playlist was exactly as long as I had in the morning and went from chill songs to more energetic. Throughout my morning routine, I could always tell how I was doing on time by the currently playing song.
- Celebrate my successes. I don't have a lot of self-discipline, so when I do actually exert some, I try to reward myself to encourage me to do it more.
- If there's something big I want to get done, I tell all my friends I'm going to do it. The fear of looking like an @ss helps keep me motivated.
"That last one (#7) is how I quit smoking. In addition to telling all my friends and family, I put on my whiteboard at the office the number of days I went without a cigarette in addition to the last time I had one."
"Last Cigarette: October 17th 2008 6:30 AM Time Since Then: <some value>
"Every time I increased the number, I felt a small victory. At some point changing the value everyday just became a habit and somewhat trivial."
"At 100 days or so, I started putting weeks instead of days."
"Not only did it keep me accountable, people would occasionally see it while in my office and tell me "good job!". While I knew they had no idea how incredibly hard it was to quit, knowing that people recognized my effort fueled me even further."
"At some point, I finally stopped remember to change the number every Friday (70+ weeks)."
"Currently, I do not know how long it has been since I have had a cigarette, but I can tell you the exact time I had my last one."
Let's be honest with ourselves: The real reason we'd like a functioning life hack is because we want to, at some point, save money or make more money. Turns out there's a few ways to keep those dimes.
Keeping It Separate
"I keep separate bank accounts from my wife. We have my account, her account, and our account. Any shared cost (savings, house, insurance, utilities, etc...) gets deducted from our joint account and we contribute an agreed amount to it from every paycheck. We maintain total responsibility and independence for our personal expenses. It has saved us a TON of headache and I would have it no other way. If she's not working, fine, I contribute her share to the joint account, and give her an agreed upon upon allowance. If I'm not working, it goes the other way. This allows us to surprise each other with gifts and eliminates any possible financial resentment."
"Edit: This is about accountability and personal freedom. When one party makes less than the other, the contribution amounts are adjusted proportionately - this is key."
Not Falling Prey To The System
"Never owe money on a car and never carry a Credit Card balance. It makes my life way easier and it is my way of saying F-ck You to the debt encouraging system we live in."
"While I'd argue that the car angle is largely improbably for most of us, I can't agree enough with the credit card thing."
"About 5 years out of college I had roughly 15k of credit card debt. I'd pay double the minimum and slowly work them down, only to run them up again when I wanted/needed something. It took me three years, but I finally got it all paid off and haven't run up anything higher than a thousand or so since then."
"The trick is to consolidate. Put all your bills on one card. Make sure to call around and get the best possible balance transfer rate for the longest. (I lucked out at something like 1% until it was paid off). Then, take all the money you were paying on all the separate cards, plus a little extra, and hit it hard."
"(For the geeky among you, imagine it as using a super-powerful attack month after month to reduce the health bar of your debt.)"
"It took about $500 a month, which made things tight, but doable. The best part was that once the debt is paid, you've gotten accustomed to living in that -$500 a month fashion, and find yourself with an extra $500 in your pocket (or savings) each month. So when you do want/need to spend, you've got the cash on hand."
Doing It On The Company Dime
"Poop at work. You'll be using less of your own tp and more of your company's time. I started going into the john to play games on my cell phone for 5-10 minutes just to take a break; while I was in there I'd pinch one out. After a few weeks I realized that I hadn't replaced my own tp at my apartment in a while."
Make active choices, be conscious about the decisions you're following through on, and most of all, be forgiving of yourself. You're not going to get these all right on the first try. It'll take a few attempts to make these part of your day to day, but it'll all be worth it in the long run.
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I've seen enough end-of-the-world movies to know that when the end does come that The Rock will not be there to save my lazy self from impending doom. Life isn't like the movies, sad to say. The relationship humans have to the world is remarkably unhealthy, and as we continue to reckon with the consequences of big business running the world, exploiting resources, and pushing us ever further toward climate catastrophe––
*takes a deep breath*
Sorry, got a bit carried away there... the anxiety is real. I promise that there are some more humorous answers sprinkled in this article, thanks to the efforts of Redditor TwoTimeToj, who asked the online community,
"What is most likely to cause humanity's extinction?"
"I've always thought..."
"I've always thought that humans will begin modifying DNA and making cyborg-like modifications to the human body until we reach the point that the concept of human will be so diluted that we will have to call ourselves another way, leading to the extinction of humanity as we know it."
So what you're saying is... On the next season of Westworld... the humans strike back.
"I think people..."
"I think people really underestimate what it would take to actually completely exterminate our entire species. We already bounced back from a population collapse down to under 10,000 once, we could do so again. Nuclear war, ecological collapse, incurable disease; I highly doubt that any of them could kill everyone. Even if it's just a few isolated pockets in the outback or the jungle that survive, that's still not extinction.
Honestly, I think it would take a cosmic catastrophe (asteroid/comet impact, gamma ray burst, etc) to completely obliterate us and that assumes that it occurs soon enough that we don't have viable populations outside of Earth."
If an asteroid or comet or gamma ray burst is going to hit us, then I suppose it would all be over mercifully quick. That's not soooo bad, I suppose.
"Zorp The Surveyor will come down to earth and end human existence by melting off everyone's faces with his volcano mouth."
Well, at least I'd laugh while I meet my maker.
"A bad-tempered, bureaucratic alien species of space engineers deciding to construct a hyperspace bypass through our solar system."
I've seen this movie. It was just okay... Ridley Scott, what were you doing?
(Don't get me started on Alien: Covenant).
"How about solar flares? What if there comes a solar flare that fries all electronics? Suddenly, we'd have no transportation, no food because it relies on transportation, no running water, no pacemakers, etc.?"
"The inevitable continuation..."
"The inevitable continuation of the mass extinction of insects leading to the mass die-off of vegetation leading to starvation. But climate disasters will be happening simultaneously along with social unrest (magnified by the increasing disparity between the wealthy and everyone else), so there will be plenty to kill off most of us before we get to the starving part."
I think nuclear war. The madman theory states that no sane person would launch a nuke due to the fact it would end the world, but I don't think sane people end up in power, and I definitely don't think someone in power would concede power as a result of war without lobbing one final and world-ending "f*** you."
And the theory of nuclear deterrence states that an enemy will be deterred from using nuclear weapons as long as he can be destroyed as a consequence. So far that's held, but... fingers crossed.
"I think it'll be a full-on Idiocracy situation. We're already over-branding everything, and getting more aggressively stupid. The regressives will take over the planet, and not know how to run anything. The problem is that no one has ever invented those auto-deactivating cryogenic pods, so Luke Wilson won't wake up and tell them to use water on their crops. Then they'll all starve."
"Greed of manufacturing companies causing pollution/rubbish that destroys the planet for us."
"Most of our societies..."
"I see most of the likely guesses already. Decent chance that we'll make our planet uninhabitable in the next 100 years or so, but there's another possibility.
Most of our societies are evolving in a deeply unhealthy way. We're not interacting physically with members of our communities and establishing connections to the people who share our cities and towns with us. In the hierarchy of needs, social connection is not high but it is there and you can already see the effects of it not being met.
I think that even if we dodge all the other bullets we'll raise enough subsequent generations of children that feel no attachment to other humans that we'll just lose our will to continue. I already see young people today who will never know the joy of a neighborhood pickup game of baseball or going to their pub to socialize or just hanging out with friends. All of their social gratification comes from talking to people online who are much more like them. There is less effort required to understand someone who likes all the same games, music and art that you do than there is to some kid on your track team, so they take the path of least resistance and a lot gets lost in that process.
This is not some cranky old man complaining about the next generation. I don't see them as entitled or lazy. I see them as the victims."
We live in a big and beautiful world. It's just a shame that we treat it as if we have somewhere else to go. Maybe if enough people get that, then we'll be just fine, but I'm not holding my breath.
Have some opinions of your own? Feel free to tell us about them in the comments below!
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Let's talk about sex babies. Don't blush, talk to us. It's healthy to chat about lovemaking. For too long we've all been oppressed about this matter. We're taught to be silent. But this topic is no longer taboo (thank you, Madonna) and as long as we chat respectfully, then there is no harm.
I'm always fascinated to hear about the details leading up to sexytime between strangers or first times between lovers. More often than not it feels like simple dumb luck. Like, sex just fell into your lap. How does that happen? Is it luck, or is there an idiot savant plan in motion? Talk to me...
Redditor u/Residential_Raccoon wanted to know some tricks of the trade that the rest of us may be able to use, by asking:
What's the dumbest way you've managed to get laid?
Sometimes it's just a look. A direct look across the room or a crowded corridor can change the plans for the evening in some fabulous ways. When sex is involved, words aren't always necessary. I can attest.
Check!Radio Station Checklist GIF by JMattGiphy
"I jokingly told my sister's friend she was on my To Do List. She took it seriously and asked if I wanted to cross her off."
"A girl I met in class was lost for her next class. Showed her the way and got her number (you know, if she gets lost again). We parted for the day. She was pretty so I ran the story to my roommate. Roommate decided to play a dumb joke by sending her a message saying that I miss her already. She texted her dorm address. Brought some food but she wanted to do something else. That was it. Lol."
"A girl I worked with told my mate that she had a thing for me. Mate told me so on the next night out I approached her with unflappable confidence and we had a good night. Spoke to my mate the next day about it and he told me he got her name wrong, it was another girl who liked me."
"Update: Thanks for the awards! Totally unnecessary but much appreciated. And yes, I did end up having a casual thing with girl 2 a couple of months later."
"Parked in a multi-story carpark while we went on our first date (had some grub). End of the night I offer her a lift home, she accepts. We walk to where I parked. The multi-story carpark is locked after 10pm, I hadn't noticed signs saying this would happen and didn't think it was a freaking thing in the first place. She invites me back to her sofa after I ask for any recommendations on taxi providers. An hour later we're both having the sex of our lives."
OH!Sports Bar GIF by OriginalsGiphy
"I was at a bar and a girl sat down next to me."
"Her: What brings you here?"
"Me: tryna get laid."
"Her: lol, me too."
"Me: (looking around the room). Yeah, there's some good looking people here."
"Her: (says nothing, just stares at me)"
Now why can't things like that happen to me? Those are movie scenarios. We're all just a pent up bag of sexy explosives. Just laying around waiting for someone to strike a match.
Scrubbedradio remains GIFGiphy
"Spotless bathroom, she told me later she was undecided until she seen my bathroom was spotless."
"My friend was at the club and he's the kind of guy that doesn't go to clubs at all. He saw a girl on the dance floor he liked and we all told him he should go talk to her. He went down and 10 min later we see him walking out the club with the girl he liked. We were all shocked he got a girl the first try. The next day we asked what happened and he told us he just complimented how good her belly button looked. We all laughed our butt off."
Seth for the Win!
"A tinder match said I looked like Seth Rogen, she invited me to a hangout. When I got there she told me that "if she could have sex with any celebrity, it would be Seth Rogen"and I laughed, she then introduced me to a couple of her friends, and she asked them "if I could mess with any celebrity, who would it be?" And they both said "Seth Rogen". And I was a close enough second!"
Feet for the Win
"A woman at my job said that my feet were sexy. I was wearing sandals. I said ok, thanks. Before our workday was over she asked if I wanted to go to her place, I was like, sure, thinking this was just a social visit. We get to her place and she says, you need to shower, I was like, ummm ok. I took a shower and she steps in as well and from there on we had lovely sex."
Sexynew girl schmidt GIF by Vulture.comGiphy
"Stared at this woman and when she said, "What!?" I said, "I'm trying to seduce you. I'm just really bad at it." We have three kids now."
Now that was some fun reading. And I def took copious notes. Did y'all? Take a chance, meet a new person... wear sandals.
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Dating––or even just playing the field––can be rough. First off, meeting people is hard. And then what do you do when you meet someone, really like them, and they can't seem to take the hint? It happens more often than you think. Flirting can be fun, but it can also be an exhaustive game.
Women shared their tales of frustration after Redditor Residential_Raccoon asked the online community,
"Girls, what's a hint you dropped that was obvious but the guy just didn't get it?"
"It took two more months..."
"He was a regular at my work. I baked him cookies, left my phone number on the wrapping and told him to call me any time to hang out at my house.
It took two more months of sledgehammers before he got it. We've been together 18 years."
Sledgehammers is one good way of putting it! Ouch. But it sounds like it all worked out.
"I'm currently giving him free food, coffee, trying to make him laugh and complimenting him.
Am I doing this right? He looks over at me when he walks past every time. His coworkers also said "he speaks very highly of you" the other night at work."
You might just want to say something instead. Sigh.
"All of them."
"All of them. ALL OF THEM. I finally just came out and told him how I felt. We were married a year and a half later."
Sounds like that was for the best! Just being direct works wonders.
"I kissed a guy..."
"I kissed a guy back in high school. He responded by hugging me for a long time and then continuing to play. Texted me a year later saying he just realized that I was into him and asked if I'd be willing to try again."
"Worked with a guy..."
"Worked with a guy for two years, in a senior position to him. He basically ticks all the boxes of what I'm looking for in a man, and I thought we had developed a certain amount of chemistry. About a month ago, I was moving on to a different job, and I finally worked up the nerve to ask him if he wanted to go to a local brewery together. He accepted, and we had a great time—talked about family, travel, personal philosophy, spirituality, goals and ambitions, laughed a lot. Stayed there until it closed. And then when we were back at our cars, he mentioned maybe we could do it again before I left town.
At this point, I just explicitly told him that this…could have been a date. And he seemed completely bowled over by that idea. I thought inviting him and only him to a food/drink venue and then having a very pleasant and substantive conversation until they closed up shop was a fairly unsubtle hint. He seemed completely taken off guard, though, and said he'd have to think about it a lot. Shrug. I told him to take as much time as you need, and I haven't heard from him since."
"But it worked out."
"My roommate and my crush's roommate were hooking up so I told my crush to sleep in my room. Then offered to share the bed. Then in bed asked for a "goodnight hug" and then I didn't let go. All night.
Took my BFF telling my crush flat out to kiss me.
But it worked out. Married for ages now."
"Took me moving..."
""I'm not interested in dating."
Took me moving away for him to get it, even then it took a while."
This is the 1980s John Hughes movie plot that I expected.
"My current partner..."
"My current partner of ten years. I invited him to my house to have some New Year's eve drinks while we counted down to midnight. I think I made it to a few minutes before midnight before I gave up waiting and kissed him for the first time."
"Went to the bathroom..."
"Went to the bathroom earlier that night, took off my panties, and later put them down my date's pocket. He just pretended like he didn't notice."
Maybe he wasn't into you? That burns, man.
Moral of the story: Perhaps being direct is the better option here. It will save both parties a lot of time, energy, headaches, and regret. But for those of you for whom it worked out: Congratulations. These stories are hilarious.
Have some stories of your own? Feel free to tell us in the comments below!