There Are So Many Better Years Ahead

"High school is the BEST YEARS OF YOUR LIFE!!!!!"

The hell it is. F that entire decade between 8 and 18. They're some of the most uncomfortable, challenging, and difficult years of a human life. It gets WAY better in the 20s and 30s, though still challenging in some ways.

If you "peak" at 16, you're selling yourself SO short!

BeckyDaTechie

Santa Doesn't Always Deliver

My uncle told me that santa would come out of the sink since I didn't have a chimney in my old house.

And that he was going to by me a ATV.

And 10,000 dollars :(

stopthehate28

If This Were True, This Sounds Like The Beginning Of A Horror Movie

Eating watermelon seeds will lead to a watermelon growing in your stomach.

As a child, I took this pretty seriously for a while. LOL.

MozamG

*stares at pile of unplayed video games

"You will play video games as much as You want when You grow up"

HogDod

Think We All Heard This One

That when the backseat light in the car is switched on, the driver is legally not allowed to drive cause it is the cause of many accidents.

Awkward_Owl_40

Ouch.

I was told my other grandma "went to china to look for her knitting."

This wasn't true, she's dead

Quazar99

Well, Kind Of, But, No

Everytime you run west you slow the earth's rotation a little bit and the moon moves further away.

RaphusCukullatus

This is actually 100% true, but the amount is so small it's like saying dropping a kool-aid packet in the ocean is going to change how it tastes.

Override9636

The Sad Thing Is It Doesn't Matter Either Way

That if you leave a google window open and idling on your desktop it exclusively leaves your computer open to internet hackers

porkisbeef

Just Don't Be High. Problem Solved.

My dad told me the vacuum would suck up my toes. I know that won't happen but I still wear slippers when I vacuum

Dandypanda88

My dad has a story about vacuuming when he was younger and he was super high, and vacuumed over his toe and the roller rolled it in and broke it, so there may be a little bit of truth here!

SpooksD2

We're All Kind Of In The Same Boat

"Get good grades in school and you'll succeed in life?"

[deleted]

Conversely "if you don't do well in school now you'll struggle all tour life".

Jokes on them, we're all struggling regardless.

pleased_to_yeet_you

This Isn't How Vikings Are Born

that if u shave your beard grows thicker

TheThirdDarkLord

I grew up in a salon because my mom is a stylist and this drives me insane. People try to tell me this bs all the time and when I challange them, I'm the crazy one of the group. More people believe the rumor than know the truth.

Naillian603

Thanks, Bro

My oldest brother (he's 21 years older than me) told me that head-lice burrowed through your scalp and into your brain, and that's why I was so stupid.. thanks bro.

B3xbury

You Descend From A Long Line Of Kings And Queens

My parents weren't supposed to be married so they used to tell little me that I would've been the child of either my mom and some other man or my dad and some other woman and as a kid I used to imagine one of them being my aunt or uncle instead of my parent and laugh, it wasn't until I grew up and took biology I realized I only exist because of those two specifically lmao

ffatimasaleem77

Why Do We Lie To Kids?

I was on a road trip and my grandparents told me that the people in the banana fields were banana benders. So one day at school I had a straight banana and I took it to my teacher and said "Mrs they forgot to bend my banana". I can only imagine what she was thinking when I explained to her what a banana bender was!

aussieisms

Feel Like This Is A Really Good Lesson For The GOP

Respect your elders.

I heard this all the time. I thought elders with more life experience should be respected more. Older people in families, grandparents, etc.

Right up until I was betrayed by one of these elders and I opened up my eyes to the deceit that people hold in their hearts. Face to face they're all smiles, but behind your back, they are, for fail of a better word, quite evil.

Now: your age is irrelevant to the respect that I should give you. Show me that you have a good heart, and you deserve my respect. Your respect will not be inherently given... But earned. And those people who have a good heart, do not even have to think about earning my respect, because it comes naturally through their words, actions, and general demeanor.

LightmareSensei

This Is Just Called Lying

As a kid, My dad told me his phy-ed teacher made him write a ten-page essay about his shoelaces as punishment. It must have been coercion for me to behave myself.

I asked him about it as an adult, and he had no idea what I was talking about.

Pantelima

Doing The Butt Bump

Thunder is the sound of two clouds bumping into each other.

LionLucy

My parents said it was giants throwing rocks, but they weren't being serious. I had read the Hobbit and they were referencing that. I actually knew the real answer because I liked reading the children's non-fiction section at the library.

24-Hour-Hate

Definitely Not How Churches Should Behave

We were guilt tripped in our church. They told us we should be able to hear God's voice. If we couldn't, we had to pray harder to remove all sin from our life.

I remember being at a 24/7 prayer camp than ran for a week. I remember sitting there for about four hours. Finally an "aide" asked me if I could hear God yet. I told him no. He said I wasn't praying hard enough and I hadn't revealed all my sins to God yet.

I was done with church after that trip.

434_804_757

There's A Slight Difference Between The Two

That I was smart, when in reality im just not stupid.

New_Game_P1us

Sometimes, it's better to be not stupid. Less expectations.

elee0228

Turns out that being smart does not equal success in any way. You are much better off being average and lucky. Just smart enough to see opportunities, that's all you need.

NastyMeanOldBender

Kids Are Smarter Than You Think. Give Them Credit. Tell The Truth.

Why has nobody in this thread mentioned the cab light in cars? We were all told it was illegal to turn on the light.

Nofreeupvotes

Why do adults do this? I never knew this was so common until I joined reddit. My mom just told us it distracts her while driving and so we didn't turn on the lights. Seems simple enough

personnnnnn29

Because people are lazy and think children are inherently stupid or too rebellious to accept a simple explanation. We've had to explain a couple times to our kid that the light can't stay on because it's a distraction.

MistressJubbs

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