People Share The Adult Versions Of Learning Santa Isn't Real
"No, Little Charlotte, Santa Isn't Real. And Neither Is..."[rebelmouse-image 18356673 is_animated_gif=
Life's full of ups and downs, but it's easier to focus on the downs. A promotion that was wrongly given to someone else. Not finishing that novel you've been working on since before college. Discovering that maybe that widow's peak you've had since you were 19 might just be early male pattern baldness.
To know they weren't alone, Reddit user, u/crushedcreditcard, wanted to know about adulthood's similar disappointments when they asked: What's the adult equivalent of learning Santa isn't real?
Even Zeus Can Fall[rebelmouse-image 18356674 is_animated_gif=
Your parents are human too so they have their own opinions and thoughts and feelings and their own perspective like everyone else, so not everything they tell you is true.
They are no longer your teacher.
Being The Best Isn't All It's Cracked Up To Be[rebelmouse-image 18356676 is_animated_gif=
Being the best employee doesn't necessarily mean you'll be rewarded the best.
I'm A Toys R' Us...Adult?[rebelmouse-image 18349667 is_animated_gif=
Some professions die.
Just because you were a good travel agent or fax repairman doesn't mean you can be one forever.
It's not just the professions which are dying. Many low level jobs staffed by middle aged people are on the brink of being made redundant.
I'm CPA with some knowledge of VBA. But I mostly work in auditing and due diligence. It is very easy to write macros in excel and we have streamlined our teams because macros automate so much of our work. Due to this, we haven't replaced our leavers in 3 quarters.
I have seen so many people work in payroll processing, accounts payable/receivable management and reporting which can be let go due to this.
Things Don't Always Matter[rebelmouse-image 18356260 is_animated_gif=
You can do everything right and still fail.
It Doesn't Just Happen[rebelmouse-image 18356678 is_animated_gif=
That none of the standard "adult life" accouterments are guaranteed to occur.
A place of your own, a functional long term relationship, a career that makes sense to you or is at least rewarding..
35 years old. I've always lived with roommates, I've effectively always been single, and after five years of ownership I just replaced my 2001 Ford Focus hatchback with a 2001 Ford Focus hatchback.
Many people, I know, have it much worse, but man... This isn't what I expected.
You Gotta Squish The Bugs, Man[rebelmouse-image 18356679 is_animated_gif=
The realization that bugs are going to get into your house and no one is going to get rid of them but you.
That's your job now bro,
Merry F-cking Christmas.
How Are They Even Moving?[rebelmouse-image 18356680 is_animated_gif=
When you see a band play live and they're all really old now
When You Can't Trust Bill...[rebelmouse-image 18356682 is_animated_gif=
Some time ago, there was an AskReddit "what did you love in childhood and who ruined it for you?". The top answer was "Bill Cosby, and Bill Cosby."
He Was Inside Of Us All Along[rebelmouse-image 18356683 is_animated_gif=
Learning that Santa is real and you're him.
WHAT?! *burns the world down[rebelmouse-image 18356684 is_animated_gif=
THE PEOPLE WHO ARE ON HOUSEHUNTERS ALREADY BOUGHT THE HOUSE
If there was one good thing to come out of the pandemic, it was that it made us all the more appreciative of all that is good in our lives.
No one ever appreciated the importance of friends or family more, having to be kept apart from each other for months, or the little things which bring us joy, which we made sure to keep doing even as pandemic restrictions were lifted.
Of course, being alone with our thoughts for such a long time also resulted in our reflecting on things in our lives, or in the world in general, which we were less than happy about.
Not to mention the all-important realization that life is short and precious, and we don't have time to waste our thoughts on some things.
"What is something you no longer have patience for?"
Off The Clock Means OFF THE CLOCK!
"Working outside of work hours."
"I used to go above and beyond, now I only put in what is required."
"Life is too short to live only to work."- Chesterfieldcat
"The working world."
"My life doesn’t revolve around working here and it never will."
"It will never be a part of my identity."
"I come in, do the job, make money, go home."
"Don’t expect me to come to all the work happy hours so I can pretend how much I love working here."- nuclearsalt
Some Things Just Don't Get A Free Pass
"Sh*tty people getting a pass 'because they're family'."- cgulashangry homer simpson GIFGiphy
Say What You Mean, Not What You Feel
"Having to guess what people REALLY mean by something they said."
"I take everything people say at face value now and don't replay conversations in my head to find out the real meaning anymore."
"Be passive-aggressive if you want to but talk to me like an adult if you really have a problem."- WateredDownSalt
EYES ON THE ROAD!
"People who text and drive."
"You're driving a giant piece of metal propelled by explosive liquid."
"Pay attention."- MasterfulNothasie
The Only Life That Should Concern You Is Your Own
"People and groups of people that only talk about other people."- Turf98
"People who can’t mind their fucking business and are always worried about what other people are doing."
"If it doesn’t effect you, f*ck off."
"It’s literally free."- wackwackwackjpgGIF by WWEGiphy
Some People Didn't Mind Social Distancing
"People invading my personal space."- Mighty-Foreskin
Influence Can Be Dangerous
"Anything that has “influencer” in it."- chemistcarpenter
Indoor Voices People...
"Streamers screaming, losing their sh*t, breaking things, and having tantrums."
"I used to think this was so funny now I just can't stand it; I can't even watch a streamer if I notice they're not using their normal talking voice." - RedditFail Oh No GIF by G2 EsportsGiphy
Taking Responsibility Is A Sign Of Maturity
"People who constantly blame others for the situation they are in."- SuvenPan
Time Is Precious And Shouldn't Be Wasted
"Waiting on people who are constantly late to plans."
"I will wait 15 minutes then excuse myself."- Dabbles-In-Irony
There's Multi-Tasking, And Then There's Just Being Rude...
"People being on their phone while in a conversation with you."
"Put your phone away!"- rosieblinkstimePhone GIF by Poehlmann FitnessGiphy
It Takes So Much More Effort To Be Nasty...
"Bad manners, unkindness and general rudeness."
"It costs nothing to be a nice person and from someone who works in a customer-facing industry, attitudes, sadly, appear to be getting worse."
"It really makes me cross."- Bellamiles85
At Least They're Being Transparent
"Medicine commercials with worse side-effects than the thing being cured."- mrbbrj
Wasting our time and thoughts about things that we know can only bring us down is simply no way to get through life.
It's essential to live our lives by taking the present moment for what it is: a present.
People Break Down The Absolute Worst Double Standards Still Being Used
Double standards are applied in society all the time, even though they should not be. A double standard is when multiple people, or groups of people, are treated differently even though they should be treated the same.
The most obvious and prevalent double standard is the difference in treatment between men and women. Women still get paid less than men for doing the same job, regardless of the equality in their duties, efforts, and achievements.
A double standard can also refer to the use of a different set of rules for multiple situations, despite the situations being the same. For example, if a friend expects you to always be honest with them, but lies to you in return, that is a double standard.
As mentioned before, double standards are applied in society all the time, and Redditors have noticed. They are only too eager to share the double standards they've noticed in their lives and communities.
It all started when Redditor FewCarry7472 asked:
"What is the worst double standard currently?"
Working Like A Dog
"Companies expecting you to be loyal to them while showing none in return. Loyalty is a two-way street. If I find a better job and give your the appropriate number of weeks’ notice, you can’t complain, especially since you can get rid of me for any reason."
"I’ve found that if you are extremely loyal to a company and show them you will be will be there no matter what, they will walk all over you. Workers who were firm and had boundaries got more things. I know of a woman who is amazing at her job, but they won’t promote her because they need a teacher. They know that they can promote over her, and she will always be there."
But It Only Happened Once!
"Work-wise, they're along the same lines. Either, the person who does pretty much nothing gets away with it constantly, but everyone else is watched like a hawk, or when the person who never calls in sick does just ONCE and it's a whole thing as if they're lying."
"I'm a software engineering manager and a peer manager is out sick literally like 3 days a week. I need you to understand that I am not exaggerating. Average of 3 days per week. Sometimes one day, sometimes a couple days, sometimes the whole week. Average = 3."
"She makes a big harumph any time I'm out - once even throwing a fit about me taking a 4 day weekend (Friday and the following Monday PTO), which I had scheduled THREE MONTHS in advance."
"It takes every bit of self-control I have ever learned, not to scream "MAYBE I NEED A BREAK BECAUSE I SPEND MORE TIME COVERING FOR YOUR A** THAN I DO WORKING ON MY OWN JOB""
"She's been working on one project for 14 months and I'M the one who has to pull some bullsh*t out of my a** for the client every. F*cking. Day.
"This is the only real problem with my job. I love it otherwise, and I'm still about damn ready to quit."
"You can do 99 things right and will always be criticized for the one thing you did wrong."
"But someone who did 99 things wrong will always be praised for the one thing they did right."
"Wow, this just sparked a (very old) memory. In school I was such a good kid - never skipped class, always on time, respectful toward my teachers. One day during my Senior year I was late to a class by two seconds and I got detention! Meanwhile half the class would stroll in late, talk during class, etc. and they never got into trouble. I'm still salty about it 30+ years later."
"As a new parent, it really bothers me when only the ladies room has those baby changing stations."
"Dads need to change poopy diapers too!"
"Been there... On a gas station on the freeway, only the ladies room had a "poop station.""
"Saw a lady coming out and asked if there was anybody else in there, she said yes and went to warn the other ladies that I was coming in to change the dirty diaper."
"Took a while (it was one of those poop explosions), a group of older ladies comes in and gets really angry for seeing a guy in the ladies room, until they saw what I was doing."
"They immediately offered help if I couldn't change the diaper alone."
"Fun interaction, it was 10 years ago, nowadays there are much more men's room with "poop stations.""
"My kids are almost a decade apart, and this statement couldn’t be truer."
"First kid was a nightmare being solo dad with him before potty training. He got changed more times in the hatch of my Subaru than anywhere else outside of the house. My daughter was easy peasy privacy."
Anyone Can Be A Villain
"I suffer from PTSD due to mental abuse from my ex-wife. I mentioned it, one time, and was told to “Man up. Women can’t abuse men.” So, now, no one knows."
"It's such bullsh*t. My brother was horribly abused by his ex wife, but she never hit him. It was all psychological, emotional, and financial abuse. It's still abuse though, and it doesn't get talked about enough."
No Way To Win
"If I show up 5 minutes late to work, I'm bad at my job and need "corrective" measures. I work 15 minutes past the end of day and I'm simply a good worker doing their job as expected."
Stay At Home
"Me at Home Depot with my daughter:
""aww daddy took the day off.""
""This is my job.""
"Target and local grocery they know I’m a stay-at-home and are actually really nice about it."
"Also, my daughter is best friends with a girl at gymnastics. Mother asked for a play date and I said, ""let me give you my wife’s number cause this is weird.""
"My friends make fun of me, but I just always say, "if any of your wives went to law school and were an executive where would you be?""
"And they say “at home with the kids.""
"Man this one drives me up the wall and I don't even have kids."
Anyone Can Be Bigoted
"People of color can’t be racist. They can be……"
"Or that white people can't know racism. Coming from living in Tokyo for years, this cracks me up."
Keep Calm And Keep Quiet
"Socially acceptable to tell introverts to talk more."
"Socially unacceptable to tell extroverts to shut up for once."
Cheating Is Cheating
"Women who think that fooling around with other girls isn’t cheating. If it isn’t then let’s both do it together."
"It’s partly because heretosexual couples aren’t taught to be threatened by it. Men especially don’t believe a woman is going to leave them for another woman. Well, maybe until recently."
Women vs. Men
"Women who don’t clean enough or aren’t organized: lazy; bad housekeepers"
"Men who don’t clean enough or aren’t organized: men"
"Single women over 30 without children: selfish, yikes, probably something wrong with her, spinster"
"Single men over 30 without children: probably focusing on his career, hasn’t found the right woman yet"
"Woman in a position of power: greedy b*tch"
"Man in a position of power: successful businessman"
"Woman doubled over in ER, clutching abdomen: "does it feel like cramps? When was your last cycle? How long has it been since you had a bowel movement? Any chance you could be pregnant? Did you eat something unusual?""
"Man doubled over in ER, clutching abdomen: "prepare the OR, this man clearly has a ruptured appendix; his life is in danger, we don’t have time for questions!""
"The most horrifying one to me is probably how men’s pain is taken seriously but women are hysterical, overreacting, attention-seeking, it’s all in the head, etc., and left to suffer. There are SO many studies showing that women are far less likely to get pain medication and anaesthetic, have higher rates of misdiagnosis, and have to wait longer for pain treatment. This sh*t has NO place in modern medicine."
"They did this 3 times before they actually started a scan. The following year my brother had stomach pains, they kept him for 3 days searching for the cause. Presumed to be the stomach bug…."
"It is insane. When I had severe stomach problems (could barely eat, only a few bites of food and I was full, etc), I had multiple nurses tell me "oh it's just your period you don't need to see a doctor." Lo and behold, when I finally saw a doctor it turns out one of the nerves in my stomach was paralyzed and I was slowly starving!"
"And now that I've transitioned to a man, it's wild that doctors take me seriously the first time. I hate it here."
Sounds more like blatant sexism to me!
Being the boss can really suck.
I've done it a few times.
One of the worst things is terminating people.
It might sound glamorous and it can be a slight power trip.
But in the end it sucks.
Even when people deserve it, being the messenger is stressful.
Nobody wants to ruin another person's day or life.
Let's see who else agrees.
Redditor sirdigbykittencaesar wanted to hear from the bosses of the world about the terminations they wish they could take back, so they asked:
"Bosses of Reddit, have you ever seriously regretted firing someone, and if so why?"
It must suck when you're duped into firing the wrong person and then you find out too late.
That DayKids In The Hall Comedy GIF by CBCGiphy
"A long time ago I was asked to fire a salesman. He was kind, but not good at selling. It was a week before Christmas. I told my boss I would fire him on Jan 3. The boss said no and fired him that day. I regretted not giving him the holiday."
"I had an assistant for about a year, who was a pretty good assistant for a difficult working situation. My boss, the district manager, hated him, though. She kept trying to catch him screwing up when I wasn't around. The trouble was, the company paid poorly, so talent was hard to come by, training was difficult, and the hours were 48 a week MINIMUM. This guy was the only assistant I had who didn't quit in less than a year."
"My stores were so undermanned, if this guy left, I'd be working 80-hour weeks like before I got him. The only reason it wasn't more than 80 hours was because the store's malls or shopping centers actually closed at night."
"Finally, one day, she wrote him up because she said 'a secret shopper' said he was picking his nose. This guy, who at least had SOME dignity, refused to sign the disciplinary paperwork. 'I want proof: I am not sitting in the showroom, picking my nose.' My boss said, 'he won't sign it, insubordination.'"
"'Fire him.' I really tried to reason with her, but she wanted him gone one way or another. 'Either you fire him, or I'll come in and fire both of you.'"
"I had to fire a man for picking his nose. I quit shortly after that because I knew this was just the lowest I had ever sunk in management. I still feel bad about all that."
"Years ago I got a call from a competing engineering company. They screwed up a job and rather than own up, decided to blame a senior technologist as the scapegoat. His immediate boss was against it but the partners demanded it. He phoned us and said 'You should hire this guy.'"
"We did and he was an excellent employee until he retired 20 years later. Our gain, their loss."
"The best part is that the guy who called me (who was a senior engineer) quit shortly thereafter and the company closed down a couple of years later - Karma I guess."
The Team Member
"Someone else hired someone with no experience after I voted 'no.' I knew he would be in over his head and he had a good job already. They didn't train him or coach him. And then after about 6 months my boss's boss comes to me and tells me to build a case against him... my team member... and to fire him."
"I quit within the next two months. F them... I'm not doing their dirty work to solve a problem they caused and enable them to keep their hands clean in the process."
It's just a puff...4-20 Weed GIFGiphy
"I was once forced to fire an awesome employee for failing a drug test (weed). And just a few years later it was legalized."
When will we just let people smoke freely?
Bad VibesDuck Reaction GIF by PLAYMOBILGiphy
"I had to fire someone on my actual last day once. And right beforehand, everyone was making a joke about the person I fired getting fired. That sucked. Not a good vibes last day at all."
"I had an employee about 4 years ago now who had chronic attendance issues. I kept her MUCH longer than my boss was happy with because she was decent and very genuine. But eventually, I just couldn't put it off anymore. When we were in the room talking she burst into tears and looked terrified and told me her husband was NOT going to be happy with her. She said he wouldn't hurt her and she didn't need me to call the police for her, but even still I'm worried he was physically abusive. The level of terror was up there."
"About 20 years ago I was running a bar Christmas Eve - chaotic night as we were incredibly short-staffed due to heavy snow and a lot of our workers being from a different area. Bar downstairs was closing up and the staff was being moved to the upstairs. We were £200 short in the bar and the main manager interrogated three out of the four - conveniently not the supervisor he was having an affair with."
"That supervisor was also in charge of the float and was generally sh*t at her job. That float for one until was convenient £200."
"Main boss wouldn't consider his fling could do wrong (a common occurrence) and he didn't want to deal with it. So it became me (the lowest of four managers) to sack three people for suspected theft. On Christmas Eve knowing I wasn't in any position financially or in terms of job security to say no."
"Only joy was that his wife finally caught him in the affair and his whole life went to sh*t soon after."
"I was forced to fire a junior person on my team, my boss gave me no choice, because she had used a competitor's idea as inspiration (working in design). But it was our intermediary boss who told her to use the idea. I wish I would have taken a harder stand but I was afraid of being fired myself, I was only a few months on the job. I still regret it to this day but the other woman has had a good career so that’s a plus at least."
"Had an underperforming employee, tried a pip, coaching, moving to a different job role with the team. Eventually came to terms with not being the right person for the job/team terminated employee. A week later her child dies in a house fire where they lost everything. I donated 1000 to the go find me but still can’t help but wonder if my termination set off the events that caused this."
PhonyThat Is All Meryl Streep GIFGiphy
"Nope. There's a long process before it gets to that point and almost nobody does get to that point. Except for the guy who got the job using fake identity papers. There was no long process to fire him, it went very, very fast once we found out."
I hated firing people.
There is never a great time.
People Break Down Their Absolute Favorite Fictitious Products From TV Shows
While we've all seen familiar items in TV shows, or even obvious product placement, most TV shows and movies also include items that were specifically made for their story line.
Though they're meant to be fictitious, we can't lie and say that we haven't wished for some of these items to be real.
Redditor splendid_moisture asked:
"What is your favorite fictitious product from a TV show?"
"As someone who doesn’t have a toaster and hates the wait time but loves toast, that instant toast-cutting knife from 'Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy' sounds reallyyy good right about now."
"'Colon Blow' from SNL (Saturday Night Live) with Phil Hartman."
"Or Chris Farley’s 'Hibernol.'"
"While you sleep, living off stored body fat, the cold will run its course. In fact, many other colds and flus may come and go, but you won’t even know it, because you’re out cold!"
"Vitameatavegamin from 'I Love Lucy.'"
"It's so tasty, too!"
"Just like candy... honest."
"Do you pop out at parties? Are you unpoopular?"
"Lucy, you got some 'splainin to do!"
Big Kahuna Burger
"The Big Kahuna Burger from 'Pulp Fiction'!?"
"That's some serious gourmet s**t."
"Now THAT is a tasty burger!"
Log Log Log
"'Log' from 'Ren and Stimpy.'"
"What rolls down stairs, alone or in pairs, and over your neighbor's dog?"
"What's great for a snack and fits on your back?"
"IT'S LOG, LOG, LOG."
"Bachelor Chow from 'Futurama.'"
"When I was a bachelor, there was a time when I was like, 'I could go for that if it were a real thing...'"
"The way my husband ate before we got married? Yeah, I'm pretty sure he would have just bought Bachelor Chow by the case and eaten it from the can with a spoon every day. They were pretty on point with that one, lol (laughing out loud)."
"The Krabby Patty of course."
"Ravioli, ravioli, give me the formuoli."
"It'd probably taste bad to humans. It's made for sea creatures and is meant to be eaten underwater."
Products from "Back to the Future"
"Hoverboards from 'Back to the Future.'"
"I'd actually rather have the pizza hydrator."
"Those auto-tighten shoes he wears in 'Back to the Future 2' blew my little mind back in the day. They're actually a thing now."
Veridian Dynamics, Period.
"Anything from Veridian Dynamics on 'Better Off Ted.'"
"Even the weaponized pumpkins?"
"...I sure miss 'Better Off Ted.'"
"'Veridian Dynamics. We're the future of food, developing the next generation of food and food-like products. Tomatoes... the size of this baby, lemon-flavored fish, chicken that lay 16 eggs a day, which is a lot for a chicken, organic vegetables chock-full of antidepressants.'"
"'At Veridian Dynamics, we can even make radishes so spicy that people can't eat them, but we're not, because people can't eat them. Veridian Dynamics. Food. Yum.'"
"The commercials were the best part. 'We treat our employees like family. That’s why we make them work weekends and all major holidays, because that’s when families should be together.'"
Also Anything by ACME
"The complete ACME line of products from 'Looney Tunes.'"
"Slingshot, dynamite, they've got it all!"
An Egg Salad Sandwich
"The egg salad sandwich that Fry ate in 'Futurama' that made him smarter and muscular."
"What's that black cracker? Tomato."
"'Fight Milk' from 'It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.'"
"I drink some every day so I can fight like a crow."
Resources from 'Star Trek'
"The replicator from Star Trek. Though not too sure if it categorizes as a product in a world without money."
"Yes, and the transporter... though it freaks me out."
"Even 'Star Trek' has a character who doesn't like them."
"Totally! I get why. I've had so many conversations about it with my husband trying to understand the theory especially when the transporter pads are used vs site to site transports... And it seems to me a person is taken apart and then put back together elsewhere, and it's questionable if that's the same person really. But the convenience seems so wonderful!"
"It's disrespectful to dirt."
Getting By with a Little Help from Our Friends
"The milk spout thing that Joey was in a commercial for on 'Friends.'"
"ÜBERWEISS from 'Friends.' As a German, I can't stop laughing about it."
"Ross's sandwich from Season Five of 'Friends' that Monica saved for him. I know I could make something similar, but I want that one."
From food to cleaning supplies to techy gadgets, it seems most viewers have wanted something to be real from their favorite shows at some point.
Somehow, our shows would feel all the more real if we could connect through a shared object, in the way we've already shared experiences with our favorite characters.