We can't always be our best selves every second of everyday. Sometimes our brains malfunction or we just decide to act a fool. And then there are also the times when we are innocent and in the wrong place at the wrong time. Trouble is always around but sometimes trouble is found by the stupidest of ways.
Redditor u/SecondBaseB wanted everyone own up to a few things by asking.... What is the dumbest reason you have gotten in trouble?
Sassy Mail....
Giphy
Back in the pre-2000 days I had the dial up access to the fairly still new WWW, so obviously my father who had no experience with the matter, needed to check my internet history to be sure I was being safe.
No amount of pleading would convince him that Hotmail was not some sort of porn messaging system. Current_Account
Hands Down....
I got an on campus suspension for fighting when someone punched me in the face and broke my glasses. Vercalos
Had something similar happen to me. I told a kid he was going to be late to class and he turned around and punched me in the face and broke my nose. When we were sitting in the office, I was told we would both get 4 days suspension for "fighting" I pleaded my case that I didn't throw a punch or anything, they said "it didn't matter, a fight is a fight."
I was so pissed I yelled "Fine!" Turned to the kid and just started punching him in the face.
The police officer that had to come and drive me home told me "I don't know if I blame you." MinerOfStarDust
Blow it for the group!
My 6th grade class has a horrible substitute who got mad that we were being so loud (nobody was talking, as it was during reading time; some kids were just pointing out funny pictures in books and giggling). She said something along the lines of, "If it isn't dead silent for the next hour, nobody goes to recess!" Well it was dead silent until about 5 minutes til when one kid sneezed so hard he had to get tissues to clean up he arm. Guess who got recess taken away? Everyone.. 😒😒😒 SaltyMonkeyy
I Coughed.....
I have asthma. In elementary school, there was a lunch period where we weren't allowed to talk, punishment was standing against the wall for the remainder of the period and I think also through recess.
I put my head down to lower temptation to talk. My asthma gives me this occasional cough, so I coughed. Lunch lady thought I talked, told me to go stand.
Later on, a different lunch lady walked up to those of us on the wall, and asked us why we're up there. My answer was "I coughed." Nobody believed me. tuba4lunch
Keep the down.... down apparently....
Giphy
Once a teacher scolded me for not having lunch money at lunch. When kids don't have lunch the cafeteria makes them a peanut butter sandwich. She glared at me while I ate it like I was some scammer. I bet poor never crossed her head. forthevic
Mommie Dearest...
Scrubbing a spot on the floor. My mom startled me and gave me a spanking before I could explain what I was doing. Once it was over and I explained that I was just moping a spot, she said that I wouldn't have jumped if I wasn't doing anything wrong. Good old abuse. Dr_Julian_Helisent
Not Demerits!
I took sewing as a class in high school. On like the second day of classes, the teacher asked us to take out a special type of chalk that she never actually told us to bring. I mean, the entire class did not have it, but she insists she told us about the class before. Sent us to the Vice principal's office where we all got demerits. My very first demerit. Corbyitoldyouso
Simmer Down Kids....
I went to a Catholic primary school where we would have mass every month. And when I was in 7th grade our class apparently sang one of the songs too passionately so we weren't allowed to go outside for recess for the day. applesaucedayz
Look Forward Dear....
A guy I was friends with stole my bag from next to me and put it outside the classroom door. I go and retrieve it and he yells 'look miss, mystictaco is late to class.' She made me stay behind and I had to explain to her that I had been there the whole time, sitting directly in front of her, in the same seat I'd been sitting in the past 6 months. My two female friends stayed behind with me to try to convince her that the other dude had stolen my bag. MysticTacoDeer
Why Pierce That?
Giphy
I got sent to the principals office in high school for having my lip pierced... I'd had it for 6 months prior and no one said anything 🤦♀️. DisloyalMouse
A mere Mortal....
For not hearing which page of the book we were on and flippig through the book trying to find it.
Made the MORTAL mistake of peeking at my neighbors page number. Teacher stopped the class and then demanded that i pay more attention. Public_Tumbleweed
The Book Kid....
During a Scholastic book fair in elementary school, I was buying books because I loved to read, so much so that I was known as "that book kid." One of my friends didn't have money to buy any books because of his family's financial situation, so I decided that instead of buying another book for myself, I'd give him the like $10 he needed to buy one for himself. Feeling proud of my noble deed, I went to sit down and start reading through one of my books, when a teacher walked over to me and asked me why. I said "Well he wanted a book and had no money, but I had money. So I gave it to him." The teacher somehow got me a detention, and forced my friend to return the $10 I gave to him.
Damn public school teachers and their anti-generosity agendas. OshikuruDemon
Just Breathe....
Giphy
I received a referral + week of detention back when I was in the 3rd grade because a 6th grader shoved me into the corner of a bench to prevent me from getting the last basketball. I had the air pushed out of my lungs and couldn't breathe or talk at all for a solid 2 minutes. Idiot teacher shows up immediately afterwards, decides I was at fault for whatever reason, and is already starting to write up the referral while I am desperately trying to motion the fact that I can't even fucking breathe. I was crying I thought I was going to die as I was getting absolutely no response from my lungs for what felt like an eternity. Loblocks2
A Bruised Peach.....
First year of middle school, I was getting used to being with all different sorts of people as I had gone to an Honors elementary school that you needed to get accepted into. Anyways, one day I was walking down the hallway when a girl i didn't know at all (who was unmistakably white, like me) walked up to me and asked me what race she was. I was like "uhhh. white??" and she B***H slapped me straight across the face and screamed "I'M PEACH YOU RACIST!" and stormed off. Little to our knowledge, an assistant principle had watched the whole thing from behind... and there I was thinking she was going to get busted for assaulting me. NO?! The AP brings me into her office for verbally assaulting this girl and making a racist comment and I had to sit in ISS for two days. k4dude
Avert your eyes!
In second grade my teacher tried to make me and my friends not be allowed to be friends and also got me in trouble for looking at another student. LilBits1029384756
Oof, I think this happened to me. I had him in all of my classes one year, and we goofed off occasionally, and then we were never in the same class again. Three years, like how? booglebeast
If you say so....
Throwing a piece of paper off a balcony at school. According to the vice principal, I would then maybe throw a pencil, then eraser, binder, backpack and then even a person. And I was just like, "excuse me wtf!" ScreamingGoat25
I love Stouffer's!
I bought the wrong frozen lasagna.
In high school, I was doing the grocery shopping. My dad mentioned he wanted lasagna, so I grabbed a Stouffer's frozen lasagna. When he ate it, he was unhappy with how little meat it contained, and screamed at me for a good 10 minutes. He had never told me that he didn't like that brand, or what brand he would have preferred - he just told me to buy a lasagna.
For years, well after I moved out and went to college, he'd occasionally bring up what a stupid idiot I am for buying a Stouffer's lasagna. It's one of the more minor reasons that I cut him out of my life. steel_jasminum
Silence!
Giphy
I dropped my pencil on the ground and someone picked it up for me and I said, "Thanks." My teacher yelled at me for talking and I got super embarrassed. hiwhatisupbros
The Squeal....
I have a fairly high-pitched voice for a man and growing up it was even worse. People always think I'm a woman on the phone and when I laugh I still sound like a little girl at 27 years old. Anyway, when I was in grade five we had a substitute one day. He asked a question and I raised my hand to answer. When I answered the question the substitute told me to stop talking like Micky Mouse. This went back and forth for a while with me trying to convince this guy that I was using my real voice. He was having none of it and I got sent to the principle (who had known me for years). When the principle asked me why I was there and I explained myself he just laughed and walked me back to class.
Curse this voice of mine. retrospect26
Mrs. Livermore is Cray....
I passed a note in class to my friend saying "don't upset Mrs. Livermore she's in a stressy mood." Obviously it was intercepted and I was kept behind after lessons.
It was years and years ago. I still think about how dumb that was of me. JustLouu
Intruder
"I was 14, alone at my grandmas house around midnight."
"She was across the street at the bar she owned."
"I was playing games on her computer, about 15 feet from one of the windows facing the backyard."
"All of a sudden the glass from that window shatters, and I ran to one of the bedrooms."
"I can hear my name being called."
"Eventually I see my grandma's ex-boyfriend enter the living room where the computer is."
"He keeps saying my name."
"I’m scared sh*tless, but I walk out and confront him."
"He says my grandma stole his ID and that’s what he came for, as he’s taking money from my grandmas purse."
"He looks f*cked up on something."
"I forget how he leaves but when he does I call the bar and people come over looking for him."
"They didn’t find him."
"About a year later he did it again, and I was once again alone there."
"Except this time instead of breaking a window he decides to try to kick the side door in."
"I’m just there chilling when out of nowhere I hear the loudest bangs coming from the side of the house and I instantly knew what was happening."
"I immediately called the bar and they sent a bunch of people over before he could make it in."
"He apparently tried to jump from one of her sheds into the alley next to her house and broke his leg."
"He went to prison."- nfreshn
They're coming right for us!
"Two bison charging right toward me down a narrow wooded path in Yellowstone when I was 12."- pcc2
Open Range Running GIF by Reconnecting RootsGiphyUncomfortable in new surroundings.
"My sister has mental health issues."
"We were in a foreign country, driving across mountains on a one lane dirt road with no guardrails."
"She had a complete mental breakdown and threatened many times to drive off the edge."
"To this day, my mom swears my sister wouldn't have done it."
"All I say is, 'you weren't in the car'."
"'You have no idea'."- BlorengeJulius
Lost in the woods.
"Getting lost on 350 acres of woods in southeast Georgia."
"Was found about 6 hours later."
The dog found me hours before the people did.- No_Regrats_42
Scared Woods GIF by Brat TVGiphyA near death experience.
"Was working as a linemen tasked to replace a 16m wooden power pole which requires climbing up to untie the lines from the isolators."
"I checked if the pole had any rot beforehand, climbed up, untied the lines, climbed down, as I was packing my tools up , the pole fell from its own."- LimaRadek
He wasn't who he claimed to be.
"A man claiming to be a meter reader was in our yard and tried the back door AFTER trying the front."
"It was unlocked because there was a field behind us and our gate had a lock, that he somehow got by."
"The meter reader man was nearly eaten by our Great Dane who was dumb and peaceful, except for when she laid eyes on him."
"Our other dog also wanted to kill him and he was up on our trampoline begging us to call the dogs off, which we, my then 11 year old sister and I, refused to do and went to get our dad, who worked from home."
"The guy escaped while we got our dad and my dad let the police know what happened."
"The real meter reader man came the next week."- Applesintheorchard
Dog Bouncing GIF by AFV PetsGiphyHad no idea what they were witnessing.
"I guess watching a loved one have a seizure when I didn’t understand what it was."
"Legit thought I witnessed a death."
"Scary stuff."- Peppapigisgodly
Always look both ways.
"I got hit by a car while in a crosswalk a few months back."
"Had a split second where I saw him coming and realized what was about to happen."
"I thought I was going to die."- jolalolalulu
Big Sister to the Rescue.
"Saved my sisters life."
"We were boating and my parents just kinda assumed we’d be ok with them only out a couple hundred feet."
"I was about 17 and she was about 7."
"I’m laying there chilling and see her slip and fall into the water and just straight up sink."
"Ran over, dove in and pulled her to shore."
"She spit up a bunch of water and was fine but that experience rocked me to my core."
"Not a super crazy story but almost seeing a sibling die has always stuck with me."
"I’ve broken almost every bone in my body, I died one time and was in a coma for a little bit but for some reason this one stuck with me."- Present-Trip5231
Often, an experience that left us scared does make for a good story down the line.
Though whether it was a good enough story to make having gone through the experience worth it, is debatable.
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Waiting tables was always the bane of my existence. Customers are rude. Staff is rude. It never ends.
Filthy Hours
Fail Just For Laughs GIFGiphy"Trash men. They’re looked down on as dirty and uneducated, but they do a hard job that is absolutely critical to our public health."
kirkl3s
You're Out!
"Youth sports officials. I umpire baseball as a hobby and the way parents act is deplorable."
kennsing75
"The parents on the other hand deserve loads of hate sometimes. I was a coach for soccer and volleyball while I was in the Air Force. You would have loved to be a sports official for our leagues at our base. If a parent got sh**ty they are immediately ejected, no questions, and reported to whoever is their higher authority. It almost never happened."
DaniTheLovebug
Behind the Counter
"Any customer (client/patient) facing job. They get the abuse that stems from managements decisions, mistakes and incompetence."
HighlyOffensive10
"I did customer service for automotive companies at a call center for years. People get so unhinged, between dealerships, management, people calling into the wrong department, angry customers who were itching for a fight over a rental car. The job paid for five free therapy sessions a year, but honestly, it would take every ounce of restraint not to break some days."
"You aren't allowed to defend yourself or hang up, you can't transfer them to supervisors for a call, you technically work for a third party company that exists to keep the customer from ever actually speaking to the corporation. It was the worst job I've ever had, and that's coming from someone who used to work at a seafood processing plant."
Bromelia_and_Bismuth
I'm Hungry
"Food service. The workers have to eat too, you know."
stinky_cheese33
"Working fast food sucked. Not because the job was hard. But because people were *icks. For like, no reason. Working in an actual kitchen also sucked. Not because the work was hard, but because you never did it quick enough and your boss was a *ick for like no reason. But at least you didn't deal with customers."
thedankbank1021
Too much stress...
Jim Carrey Omg GIFGiphy"Defense attorneys. People hate them because they defend violent criminals. However, as one lawyer put it, their job is not just to defend these people; their job is also to make sure that the cops did their job correctly."
TomoyoHoshijiro
I've always wondered about defense attorneys. How do they reconcile their morals?
They're Smart Too
will birth control GIFGiphy"I live in Germany and currently in my (hopefully) last semester of university to become a pharmacist (4 years of university, one practical year and three exams of state required). A lot of people here think pharmacists are only cashiers and don’t know we get a scientific education. And God help me if I question a doctor's decision."
this_is_lune
Hard Hours
"I usually just lurk as a guest, but I made a Reddit account just for this. Cooks for public schools. They are constantly overworked, underpaid, and disrespected. Most schools have only a few ovens and microwaves, so school chefs have to either jam unsafe amounts of frozen food into ovens and microwaves, which is a giant fire hazard, or work non-stop from early morning."
Clingitty
Green Thumbed
"Plant breeders and plant geneticists. Imagine you're a plant nerd and you spend your life studying genetics so you can figure out how to improve food crops. Like, to make them yield more, taste better, be healthier, survive drought, etc. But on the internet, you're apparently trying to poison the world and control the food supply."
kjhvm
Heartless
"Veterinarians. My doctors CONSTANTLY get yelled at or called heartless when, for instance, we refer them to a hospital more suited to care for the animal than us. Like bro we didn't just tell you know we are giving you options and trying to ensure you seek the proper care. Don't call me a heartless b**tard for that crap."
Zfullz
No Fun Involved
Angry Neil Flynn GIFGiphy"Janitors. Trash-related work. Sewage workers. Plumbing."'
SubiWhale
I feel for everyone in these jobs. They deserve better.
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In other states, you and your ladies can live a more peaceful life. Here in Florida, it's A Song of Sweat And Fire Ants.
Ever get tiny little jellyfish stuck under your side-boob? Happens here all the time.
Bikinis should come with a "Sand Lice, Your Titty Crease, And You" informational pamphlet.
Wanna jog? Hope you accounted for the fact that the air is soup and will chafe and cauterize your nipples.
Know what limits your field of vision, making you more likely to accidentally step on a snake and/or gator? Boobs.
Know what slows you down as you try to escape the angry reptile from the above paragraph? Also boobs.
Reddit user Saibotnl1 asked:
"What's the most negative thing about having boobs?"
Now take all this stuff they said sucked, and then put it inside of a steam oven filled with mosquitos. That's Florida.
And Florida is incompatibile with breasts.
Cardio Is Hardio
GIF by VIASWEATGiphy"I love them but running can be a nuisance even in a good sports bra."
- [Reddit]
"When I go to work, there is a woman that usually runs on the shoulder of the road. I gasp at how much her boobs bounce. Isn't that doing damage to tissue? Painful?"
- notanotherbreach
"Yes! I literally always hold mine when going up/down stairs so they dont bounce. Running is uncomfortable even with a good bra :/ "
- k_g94
"If it's a sports bra that holds you, it's so tight that it's impossible to get into or out of without a whole team of people like a pit crew."
"If you can comfortably get into it, it won't hold the girls for long."
"Cardio is just not worth all this."
-[Reddit]
"As a kid I wasn't fit enough for jump rope, but now that I'm older and have the big boobies it feels even more impossible to ever indulge in."
- PoiLethe
Literally In The Way
"They get in the way!!"
"Lately I've been getting frustrated with exercise. My personal trainer will say to hold something a certain way and I'll try but it's so uncomfortable because my boobs are completely in the way."
"She has small boobs so she doesn't account for them being in that space right in front of your chest."
- J09Lynn
"My English teacher in 10th grade was drinking water one day when a few drops landed on his shirt. He then complained about getting older and how he never stuck out far enough to get his shirt wet."
"I just sighed."
"4th grade. 4th grade is when I stuck out too much to avoid drips."
- wheredMyArmourGo
"So very much this."
"I refuse to do mountain climbers when my trainer suggests it, she started to get mad saying it's a great exercise. My retort was that I'd really rather not knee myself in the breasts as part of my workout."
"The lady has small boobs and replied that she had never thought of that!"
- Pauliester
Growing Pains
"Probably growing them."
"It hurts, and if you get big boobs young and quickly, it’s both physical and social agony."
"It hurts to grow them, first of all, your chest aches and bumping them against anything really hurts - and since they’re a sudden, large addition to your body, you’re ALWAYS bumping them on stuff."
"But the social aspect is worse."
"Your female family members comment on them slyly and smirk at your response."
"Your male friends look at you weird and you have to realize they see you as more sexual than girls with smaller chests, even though you literally cannot control this."
"Other girls can be nasty and jealous."
"Eventually I learned to manage all this and I like having breasts now; but from like 11-16 I was so frustrated and upset that I had developed them at all."
- Individual_Ad_7523
Two Volcanos
rachael ray boob sweat GIF by First We Feast: Hot OnesGiphy"The sweat and itch!"
"Also that they're like two volcanos, which isn't especially practical during summers or when you're a constantly hot temperatured person anyway."
- Queen-of-meme
"No matter what I try, the skin under my boobs never cools down!"
- Local_Masterpiece_
"Boob sweat is the bane of my existence when it's even a little bit hot outside - and sometimes even when it's not lol..."
- PleasuredMeatStick
"I hate the feeling of sweat on my boobs. I just put tissue between and underneath my boobs to hopefully absorb the sweat so it won’t start to itch and drip."
- LuckyBugHarley
Technological Advancements
"I STILL am not able to remove them after a long day. Why?!"
"Why can't I just set em aside for the night, all done. Why hasn't technology advanced to this possibility yet??"
- IAmNotLookingatYou
"Absolutely they would. The relief we would get ... oh my god it sounds divine."
"Maybe I wouldn’t be so b*tchy."
- Object_Prize
"I’d honestly probably only wear them for ren faire, and leave them at home the rest of the year."
- AbbyNormalKnits
Double Trouble
"The double standard of girls with small chests and big chests."
"If you have a big chest no matter what you wear or do it's sexual. But for girls with smaller chests they can get away with crop tops or v necks or even swim suits."
- BigBunsLittleBunbun
"Lol the bigger girls who spent their entire grade school years getting sent to the principal's office for breaking dress code will agree with you."
"Loose shirts will tent and billow up in the wind as you walk-- dress coded."
"Tight shirts that don't tent but cling to your chest-- dress coded."
"And don't even think about anything but a crew neckline, or you'll be dress coded again."
- cryptic-coyote
"Exactly!"
"I always got in trouble for wearing dresses in school, but skinny Minnie wearing something even worse gets by no problem just because she doesn't fill it out the way I do."
- APD2269
Expensive
Happy Music Video GIF by DJ MustardGiphy"They're expensive."
"Bras are expensive and you need regular bras, sports bras, probably something special like a strapless or low back if you have a special occasion or something."
"And don't even get me started on women's healthcare ..."
- SailorSpoon11
"Stage 4 breast cancer patient here, and it costs me about an extra $5000/yr to stay alive if everything goes well."
- insertcaffeine
"I just stopped breastfeeding and none of my bras fit anymore."
"I’ve just been wearing sports bras every day because I don’t even know what cup size I am anymore and I don’t want to spend a fortune replacing all of my bras."
- kaytay3000
"Plus if you choose not to wear bras for any number of reasons, you’re treated as deviant or an acceptable target of inappropriate attentions."
- letsjumpintheocean
Getting Comfortable
"Laying on your stomach can be tricky."
- ChadweenaThundervag
"Laying on your back can be tricky as well."
"And on your side."
"Just laying in general with big boobs is a hassle."
- Skkaj225
"Am guy."
"However women in my life have found it difficult to get a decent back massage because of this. I've seen plenty of massage tables with head holes, but none with boob support..."
- DeluxeWafer
"Semi-suffocating yourself on the beach while trying to get some sun on your back is fun."
- Miikami
Either Or
"The fact that I look like a walking refrigerator if I wear a loose fitting top, as it billows shapelessly around my body in an odd fabric rectangle."
"But if I wear something form fitting, I look like a lady of the night and am treated as such."
- batchofbetterbutter
"OMG this !!"
"I feel like all my girlfriends around me have such a fashion sense and can wear things with such grace but I always look as you’ve described. Like either I look like a couch pillow or Jessica Rabbit."
"Sometimes I just want to cut them off honestly."
- octokisu
"Yeah I’ve been wanting a reduction since a was a teen because of the back pain and catcalling, and many people I know with a bigger chest feel the same way."
- didithedragon
"I had no idea women hated their boobs so much! It honestly is shining a light on an idea I have never thought of."
- Peter_the_pear
Attempted Murder
Black Woman Breast Cancer Awareness GIF by Know Your GirlsGiphy"They might try to kill me."
"Breast cancer runs in my family and I have to have my first mammogram this year at 36."
"My mom was negative for both BRCA genes but there are 6 others they’ve discovered since she had cancer that we haven’t been tested for."
"Insurance won’t cover me to test unless she tests positive for one."
- Outrageous-Proof4630
"Fun fun fun."
"My mom died from breast cancer at 46. I started getting mammograms at 34."
"Luckily, I took the BRCA test and was negative."
- lil_ho_on_da_prairie
It's Constant
"Constantly being sexualized."
"I’m the least sexual person but people assume I’m super sexual because of my body. And I hate it"
- Plus_Bison_7091
"Yup, I'm ace and I honestly just want them chopped off to be rid of the constant sexualization of my body."
"It makes me really uncomfortable."
- zapsquad
"My friend in elementary school had a condition where she went into puberty super early and had large breasts by 3rd grade."
"We would walk together to elementary school every morning and get cat called a lot, but we were too afraid to tell our parents because we thought they wouldn't let us walk together anymore."
"She would have teachers make comments about them."
"When we were older she talked about how insanely awful and alienating it made her feel growing up. Her younger sister had the same condition, but went on puberty blockers for it."
- gentlybeepingheart
Destroyed
"These pendulous bags of hell have destroyed my back."
"Even a decade after a reduction surgery, I remain in daily pain. And now as an added bonus they get to be misshapen, scarred horribly, and completely useless for raising a baby."
- Originalluff
"I didn’t realize how heavy they are until I got together with girl with big boobs and woooooow they are heavy!"
- I_love_pillows
"I got C cups in fifth grade and those f*ckers went all the way to G by senior year."
"My posture was/is awful and I've felt like an old woman since I was a teenager. I don't even want babies, so they're never actually gonna be useful either."
- Rozeline
See what I mean?
They're kind of awful once they hit a certain size, and that size is pretty much ANY size if you're in Florida.
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