Sometimes walking and talking can be hazardous to one's health. Heck, just walking and breathing can be a detriment. We're not always on guard from injury 24/7, how can we be? Danger lurks around every corner. Some of us are just prone to falling down and causing a spectacle. The world is full of so many lovely distractions. I'm not able to see every step or car or person. I'm too busy updating my romance app. Hello.
Redditor u/itsoscilatingagain wanted everyone to fess to those moments that are shameful and oh so hilarious by asking.... What is the dumbest way you injured yourself?
Rinse. Lather. Repeat.
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Dropped a bottle of shampoo in the shower, bent over to get it, sneezed, slipped and gave myself a concussion. JimmyL2014
I did something similar when I was 10. Bent over in the shower, hit my head on the door handle on my way up. Knocked myself out and I fell through the glass door. Not my finest moment. CassyOoo
Not the Face. Never the Face!
Assumed a stapler was empty because I saw someone attempt to use it, then they put it back (it was jammed) tried to trick my mate into thinking i was gonna staple my face... miraculously un-jams and to a group of people it looks like I just felt like stapling my face. vipervsrabbit
Swing Low!
The only black eye I've ever had... I gave to myself while playing wii boxing. Won the game though! oogilyboogilytoo
I accidentally punched myself in the face/nose 2 weeks after a nose job, barely 4 days after I got the splint off. That was fun. eventhestarsburn
Broken Limbs....
I forgot that I had legs, so I slammed the car door while my leg was between. eipeif
I've posted this somewhere else, but when I was a kid I had the habit of closing doors on my arms and/or legs. So one day, I was super focused on ya know... not doing that, so I was paying a lot of attention to the location of my limbs. In the process of doing this, I forgot about this other really important thing - my head. Slammed my head in the door. Real slick. cloud_brick
Eyelid Fail!
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My eye was cold so I put a big round Christmas light that had been on for awhile on my eyelid and burnt my eyelid. My step sister was the only one who watched it play out and just said from across the room, "Um what the f**k!" blackmidianxiety
The car is like a coffin!
Slammed my finger in the top of the door to my jeep. I was stuck and I couldn't pull it out, had locked the door, and dropped my keys at the same time. It was really hurting. I was just able to reach my keys and unlock the door. It hurt so bad. Nail turned black and blue and eventually fell off. eac555
Leave the Stick... you're not a dog!
I found a big stick in a field and threw it like a javelin. I didn't think about the fact that it was L shaped so it hit me in the back of the head and I fell over. leest
I was pushing on a dead tree with a quad to try and knock it down for firewood and a branch broke off, skimmed my head, and tore my ear. That was a fun thing to explain at the ER. Rust_Dawg
Golf ids Risky!
Watched my grandfather cut open a golf ball to show me what the core looked like. After he did it, 7-year old Ricky decided to replicate the feat.
Some Key differences:
1: he put it in a vise. I used my soft fingertips.
2: he used a power saw of some kind (I don't remember, I was 8). I had my dad's handsaw.
Needless to say, the shape of the golf ball and my inexperience with tools led to more blood than I had ever seen in my short life. RistaRicky
Beware the blade.... any blade!
I was using a butter knife to scrape excess wax out of a little glass Christmas candle. The glass shattered. The knife went right into my palm. Blood everywhere. Yep, I stabbed myself with a butter knife. larebareblog
I cut my top thumb tendon via knife stab. They had to cut the wound bigger so they could reach the ends of the tendon. I remember that you could see the shape my tendon through my thumb skin because it got fatter due to the fact that it wasn't stretched out anymore. Like how a rubber band gets thinner when you stretch it. Anywho, pretty traumatizing but I do have a cool lightening bolt shaped scar now. _Mynameis_JUDGE_
A pop is never good....
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My dad tore his ACL putting on a sock. Was sitting on the bed, went to cross his legs to put the sock on, ACL just popped. tcguy71
See, this is what happens when you don't warm up first!! Licensedpterodactyl
Oil is a Weapon.....
I heated up my pan of oil and lazily plopped my steak in my cast iron pan. Sprayed hot oil all over my face. Thank God I have glasses, had some splotches right where my eyeball would be.
WHAT an Idiot I was right then. TabascohFiascoh
I Believe I can Fly!!
When I was 8 I was swinging on a swing and I had an idea to jump off it. I jumped too late, flew 2 meters in the air and landed on my right arm. I couldn't move this arm for a week. M1ODEK
My twin bro and I used to jump out of swings all the time! One time, we built sand castles to use as targets. The sand on our hands made it much harder to grip the chains. Twin Bro ended up falling backwards out of a swing, landing on his wrist, and breaking it.
We were then prohibited from jumping out of swings, which just meant we couldn't do it when Mom was around and we had to use other excuses to explain any injuries (usually scraped knees, because shorts). insertcaffeine
Getting Raked....
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Trod on a rake cartoon-style, so it stood up and hit me in the face. Twice. The same day. SpoonhorseNice
! I did this with a shovel, just once though. Got whammed in the face with the handle while climbing out of a ditch. ChipsAndTapatio
My sister did this to a pitchfork, she still has a scar on the top of her foot. I don't know how it happened. Trey5169
Don't use just anything!
I was around 11/12 years old. I was in the "I wonder what stuff I can use to assist in jerking off" stage. So I was taking a shower and I see the different lotions and such so I figure I give it the old college try. So I take some shampoo and I start using that. It didn't work that well. "Oh well" I thought. Finished my shower and got out.
The next morning I wake up and go to the bathroom. OUCH. All the skin on my penis was BURNING. CRACKING. Severe pain all over. Peeing was not fun. Getting an erection was the worst. I had no idea what was wrong. But of course fear kept me from getting help. I did eventually asked my dad, he wasn't able to tell much other than nothing was seriously wrong. I showered again. I was fine.
The problem? I forgot to wash the shampoo off my penis. cricket9818
Never look down the Barrel!
Back in the day when you pumped up nerf guns, I was in the toy store checking them out. I pumped one up until it wouldn't pump anymore. when it wouldn't fire, what did i do? looked down the barrel and pulled the trigger of course. caught a suction cup dart right in the eye, point blank. original_4degrees
Of all things... Scope?
I burned my urethra because I had run out of soap in the shower and figured I could wash my genital area with Scope Mouthwash... let me tell you something...I can still feel the pain 22 years later. It felt like someone poured Lava into my pee hole... don't know what I was thinking. GetaGoodLookCostanza
Getting Nailed...
When I was like 4 or 5 I was at my babysitters ranch (I lived in Wyoming) and was hanging out with my sister and the 13 year old babysitters son. We always liked to climb up this shed with a wavy tin roof. It rained recently. I slid off. Landed on a rusty nail.
There was a large red gash on my thigh and I still have a (kinda) scar there to this day. lvl69bard
The Best Way Down....
In kindergarten our teacher took us to the park that was across the street from the school. In there she devised a contest about who could climb a tree the fastest (yeah... this wasn't a very good school). I won, and since all the rest of the kids were also on the tree I ended up being the highest one. We pretty much looked like this and then this incredibly talented teacher decided, once we were in that position, to do the same contest but this time to see who would get down the fastest.
She underestimated my genius. I won by jumping down and fracturing my arm. Transferred schools very shortly afterwards. Kypt
How are you alive?
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An old friend and I found this old refrigerator in his back yard. Had the bright idea to start hitting it with an axe and sledge hammer for craps and giggles. As it fell I part I attempted to pull the sheet metal off and sliced my the back of my hand. I some how didn't realize I cut my self and got bored so we started throwing a football. About 5 minutes later I felt my leg get all wet and looked down to see my hand wide open and about passed out at the sight of all the blood. 32 stitches later I'm left with a nice scar on my hand. We were like 15 at the time. uselesknowledgeadict
Good Ole Ivy League Fun.
At a frat party I was so drunk I tried to slide down our two story stairwell and when I went to climb On it I fell off the other side. Somehow didn't break any bones but I couldn't walk right for a week and my entire right thigh was black and blue. Joonthedoomdood
So a normal university kid? green_bin_coon
For many childhood memories are overrun by living nightmares.
Yes, children are resilient, but that doesn't mean that the things we see as babes don't follow us forever.
The horrors of the world are no stranger to the young.
Redditor -2sweetcaramel- wanted to see who was willing to share about the worst things we've seen as kids, so they asked:
"What’s the creepiest thing you saw as a kid?"
Serious Danger
"Me and my best friend would explore the drainage tunnels under the Vegas area where we grew up. These were miles long and it was always really cool down there so it was a good way to escape the heat of our scorching hot summers. We went into this one that goes under the Fiesta casino and found a camp with a bunch of homeless people."
"Mind you we are like 11 years old lol. And we just kept going like it was nothing. It wasn’t scary then but when I look back at it we could have been in some serious danger. Our parents had no idea we did this or where we were and we had no cellphones. We could have been kidnapped and never have been found."
oofboof2020
Waiting for Food
"I was at a portillos once when I was 12 and I was waiting with my little brother at a booth while my parents got our food. This guy was standing with his tray kind of watching me then after a couple of minutes he started to walk over really fast not breaking eye contact with me."
"He was 2 feet from the table and my dad came out of nowhere and scared the s**t out of him. He looked so surprised and just said he wanted to see if I’d get scared or not. He left his tray full of food near the door and left. My folks reported him but we never went to that location again since we found a better one closer to home."
nowhereboy1964
Captain Hobo to the Rescue
"When I was a pretty young teen, my friends and I were horsing around in San Francisco and started hanging out to smoke with some homeless guys. Another homeless dude came up and began aggressively trying to shake us down for anything (money, smokes, a ride, drugs- all of it) and wouldn’t take no for an answer."
"We got in over our heads and could tell this guy was now riling the other 2 guys up and they were acting like they wanted to jump us. Some grandfather-looking old homeless man appeared out of nowhere and yelled at us to get the f**k out of here- nice kids like us don’t belong down here at this hour!!"
"Captain Hobo saved our lives that night. My parents sincerely thought we were at a mall all day lol."
FartAttack911
Survival
tsunami GIF
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"I was 7 and survived the 2004 tsunami in Thailand. Witnessed the wave rise way above the already massive palm trees (approx. 40ft?) and my family and I watched/heard the wave crash into the ground from a rooftop."
faithfulpoo
These Tsunami stories are just tragic.
On the Sand
Scared The Launch GIF by CTV
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"We were a group of kids who went to swim in a local lake. And there was a dead body on the beach with their hands raised and their legs bent unnaturally that local police just took out of the same lake. I've never put my foot in these waters again."
oyloff
Be Clever
"I was walking to school and I was about 5 or 6 years old and some guy pulled up beside me in his car and asked if I would get in. He also offered me sweets to do so. I said no. The creepy bit was when he calmly said ‘clever boy’ to me, then drove off. I’ve never even told my parents or anyone else about this as it would most likely freak them out."
OstneyPiz
Bad Jokes
"Dad's side of the family pranked me by burying a fake body on our back property and had me dig it up to find valuables. Was only allowed to use a lantern for light. They stuffed old clothes with chicken bones. Sheetrock mud where the head was... Random fake jewelry as the treasures... I was like maybe 10 or 11.. I remember digging up the boot first and started gagging because it became real at that point."
Alegan239
YOU
Who Are You Reaction GIF by MOODMAN
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"Woke up to find my little brother staring at me in the dark, asking, Are you really you?"
PrettyLola2004
Siblings can really be a bunch of creepers.
No one should talk to others in the dark though.
Not all pet owners have the same relationship with their pets.
While anyone who decides to become a pet owner, or pet parent as some say, love their pets equally, some never ever let them leave their side.
Taking their pet with them to work, running errands, even on vacations.
Many pet parents even allow their pets to share their bed with them when going to sleep.
For others though, this is where a line is finally drawn.
Redditor Piggythelavasurfer was curious to hear whether pet owners allowed their pets to share their bed with them, as well as the reasons why they do/don't, leading them to ask:
"Do you let your pet sleep in your bed? Why/why not?"
The Tiny Issue Of Water...
"Absolutely not."
"I have fish."- Senior-Meal3649
Everyone Gets Lonely Eventually...
"I adopted an eleven year old cat the day before Halloween."
"She has mostly lived in my closet since I got her, and she hasn’t been too interested in coming out."
"Last night, she came out of my closet and jumped up on my bed, and crawled under my covers and curled up by my feet to sleep."
"I was so happy!"- YellowBeastJeep
The Comforting Reminder That You're Not Alone...
"I recently lost my Greyhound but I used to let him sleep on my bed with me."
"The company was nice and he was no trouble to have on my bed."- HoodedMenace3
Hungry Cookie GIF by De Graafschap Dierenartsen
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What Do You Mean Allow?
"I have no choice."
"She is a cat, cats do whatever they want."- Small_cat1412
"He lets me sleep in my bed."- Poorly-Drawn-Beagle
Wouldn't Have It Any Other Way
"I carry my old boy upstairs to bed every night."- worst_in_show
Hug GIF by The BarkPost
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Who Needs An Alarm Clock?
"I let my two cats sleep with me."
"They're so full of love and just want cuddles all the time."
"And so do I."
"We've all developed a lil routine."
"Get to bed, oldest sleeps on my feet to keep them warm, youngest lies in my arm while I lie on my side (she the little spoon), then when I snooze my alarm for work in the morning the youngest paws at my face and meeps loudly to wake me up."- GhostofaFlea_
Whose Bed Is It Anyway?
"Yes."
"They're also kind enough to let me squeeze into whatever space they've left for me."
"Although I do get a few dirty looks off them."- Therealkaylor
"I found this tiny kitten screaming her head off under a car."
"Would not come out."
"Got some food and some water in dishes."
"I stood by the tire so she couldn't see my feet."
"She got curious about the food and water and started gobbling it down."
"I thought she would bolt when I squatted down."
"She was too busy eating."
"I grabbed her by the nape of the neck and all four legs went straight out and she tried to scratch me to death."
"I got her in the door and tossed her toward the couch."
"She ricocheted off the couch as if she was a ping pong off a table and I lost sight of her."
"I put out food and water and a sandbox and did not see that kitten for three days."
"On the third day, I came home and she was on my bed pillow."
"I thought she would bolt when I came near, but she didn't."
"I wanted to sleep so I tried to scoot her little butt off my pillow."
"She would not go."
"I put my head down to sleep and that is the way it was from then on."
"She ran the roost."- Logical_Cherry_7588
sleepy kitten GIF
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Sleeping Is A Prerequisite...
"No, he's a cat and he cannot keep still during the night."
"He walks across the headboard, opens the closet doors, jumps into the windows and rustles the blinds, etc."
"If he would sleep he could stay, but alas, he's a ramblin' man."- Spong_Durnflungle
Saying No Just Isn't An Option...
"'Let'."
"Lol."
"It's a cat's world and I'm happy to be on her good side."- milaren
Felines Only!
"The cat does, the dog doesn't and the horse certainly does not either."- Xcrowzz
Angry Tom And Jerry GIF by Boomerang Official
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Is That My Hair On That Pillow?
"My dog is perfect."
"She comes up, cuddles til we start to fall asleep, then gets down to sleep on her bed so she doesn't get too hot."
"Jumps back up in the early morning for wake up cuddles."
"The hair everywhere is the only downside but she is so cozy, what can you do."- HoodieWinchester
It is easy to understand how some people are able to fall asleep more easily knowing their friend and protector is there, in bed, with them.
Though we can't blame others who don't want to run the risk of being scratched or bitten in the middle of the night either...