You ever try to go to sleep at night only to find that you can't because your brain won't stop reminding you of some embarrassing thing you did when you were ten?
After Redditor Pyrezz asked the online community, "What did you as a kid that makes you cringe when you remember it?" people shared their own stories.
"I put gum..."amy poehler deal with it GIF Giphy
I put gum on my balls when I was five and freaked out when I couldn't get it off. Went to the living room crying to my parents, aunt, and uncle. That was damn near 30 years ago and I can still see my uncle laughing harder than anyone since. As a matter of fact any time is brought up he loses his s*** and cant stop cry laughing for about 15 minutes. Hands down my least favorite childhood memory.
"I thought my voice..."
I thought my voice was a weapon so I screamed at people.
"I think about it often..."
My best friend's mom took us to McDonald's, but I really wanted Wendy's for some reason. I threw a fit until she drove us to Wendy's as well.
I think about it often and wonder what made me act like such a brat, and when that behavior changed.
"I sent a girl..."
I sent a girl lyrics to a Korn song and pretended it was a poem I wrote hoping it would impress her.
"I put loads of pop culture references..."
I put loads of pop culture references in my school tests, and also did the ninja run everywhere I went.
"I used to just randomly..."
I used to just randomly stare at people and think "I know you can hear me. Don't look inside my head!" I thought I was some mind whisperer.
"I'd be lying..."
I snatched my great-grandmother's obsidian urn (that is: she was in) from the mantelpiece once, when we were visiting my somewhat weird and reclusive grandfather. Even though I was only six or so, I'd be lying when I said that I was completely clueless about what the thing was. It just looked very cool and mysterious. I unscrewed the lid and filled it up with candy and expensive meats I'd found in the kitchen.
My "plan" was to use the urn to smuggle the loot back home when we'd leave later. I forgot about it, however, and my grandfather only found out about what I had done a week later, when his living room inexplicably started to smell rancid and cadaverous. It sparked a confrontation between him and my parents, and the next time I saw him he was in an urn as well.
"I think I was an exquisitely cringeworthy..."
Lassie the dog was my absolute hero and I couldn't watch an episode of Lassie without sobbing uncontrollably the whole way through and for several hours afterwards. I genuinely thought I was somehow descended from/related to Lassie because I could go upstairs on all fours quite quickly, which I used to do every time I went upstairs, and 'run' on all fours quite quickly. Because of this I used to frequently declare 'I'm not just a star, I'm a real life superstar' which my family found utterly hilarious. Once I got over this delusion I swore my family to secrecy about this little phase but I suspect that, at the very least, my older brother has told his wife, but probably also all his friends throughout his life.
Also, my older brother and his friend asked me what was the scariest book I had ever read. They meant books like James Herbert and Stephen King and I said 'Five Go to Mystery Moor' by Enid Blyton.
I think I was an exquisitely cringeworthy and embarrassing kid! A lot of my recollections seem to be of my family in hysterics at something I said in all seriousness which made me really angry which made them laugh even more! Believe it or not I somehow turned out quite a normal adult!
"It turned out..."
It was in history class, I decided to try and be funny by standing up and dancing when the teacher wasn't looking or facing the class. I did it maybe once or twice but no one laughed.
It turned out there was another adult in the room that was watching while grading the teacher. I didn't notice her until after and she just gave me this stern look like "What the hell are you doing? Stop."
I slowly turned back, fully embarrassed and didn't speak for the rest of the class, surprisingly? She didn't tattle on me or get me in trouble, and I appreciate that. The moment was cringe enough.
"I was a strange kid."
I once wrote a letter to my best friend that she wasn't my best friend anymore and should try harder. I think I was just insecure because she was hanging out a lot with another girl and I was very jealous of that. Kinda dumb of me cuz' that letter upset her a lot and I think was one of the reasons we're not friends anymore. This was like 10 years ago I think? I still have her reaction letter somewhere. We wrote letters to each other all the time even though she lived in the next street. I kinda miss her to be honest.
Bonus: I used to love hiding under the table in my house or under the desk in my room and see how long it would take before people would notice me. There have been moments that I was literally under that table for like three hours. I was a strange kid.
"Scooter Truth..."spy kids by leo GIF Giphy
I watched a lot of spy kids, so when I would ride my scooter I would wait until I seen people older than me and talk in to my invisible spy watch saying "Got it, I'm on my way" and speed off.
I used to search motivational quotes and copy paste it to sound cool. I was acting a 59 year old when I was 11-13. Crap I am cringing now thinking that.
I had a fit like that in school when I was 9. I threw a fit (which included me throwing a desk) because I didn't get a chocolate cupcake on someone else's birthday. My parents took me to anger management after that. I still cringe about it.
I was 5 or 6 and I saw in a school book a picture of an open mouth, and the epiglottis drew my attention. I wanted to find out if I had one too, so I stuck my finger down my throat trying to touch it.
I puked all over my desk and my teacher had to call my parents to take me home.
All the seventh graders in Mr. Barrios's history class had to complete a "millennium project" where you pick five (ten? can't remember, this was 19 years ago) key moments that defined the last thousand years. i was OBSESSED with michael jackson (like, michael jackson themed bar mitzvah obsessed) and i included the first time he performed the moonwalk at the motown 25 awards as one of those moments. i shudder to think what the teacher thought.
i guess also having a michael jackson themed bar mitzvah qualifies for that too, though everyone loved my faithful performance of billie jean, where i basically recreated the motown 25 performance.
i've come a long way since then... i swear.
"Kim? Is that You?"
Being embarrassed that my parents weren't rich.
Ironically I was embarrassed if I said or did anything that made me feel wealthy. I wasn't super wealthy growing up but was like upper-middle class. I felt super awkward if I ever said anything about how much something I bought was or anything that inferred I or my parents had a lot of money to spend.
I once walked into a barbers shop, and asked a bald guy, "What brings you here?" No, he was offended, and my mom told me it was time to leave lol .
"Greased..."ronald mcdonald wink GIF Giphy
The bowl cut that was parted down the middle with gel. Looked like a greasy McDonald's arches on my head.
5th grade, I broke a window in a friend's screen door (in winter it had glass) with a damned yo-yo. My mom and dad had separated, money was really tight, and I just couldn't face the prospect of her having to pay for it so I just ran. Next day friend's dad called me over to ask if I broke it. I denied it even though he was holding half of my yo-yo that had broken off. But he either understood my then current situation or was just polite enough to let it go. I still cringe about that to this day. I tried to pay when I was 17 but he pretended he didn't remember it happening and refused to accept anything. Now I cringe I didn't try harder to pay.
"I'm Alive"the little mermaid ariel GIF Giphy
This is middle school related:
I was that weird kid that did gross stuff for attention (and also money).
I licked the entire bottom of my shoe for a dollar so I could get a gatorade. I ate bugs and did other stupid crap too. Climbed up on the roof and they called the fire department.
My 3 years of cringe. After that, it was my, "How did I not die" phase.
I used to spend hours looking up "how to become a mermaid, fairy, pony...etc." Me and my friends would make potions from shampoo and rocks and thought that this would do something. Thankfully, I never consumed these liquids, but instead poured them on my hands or the ground. Still waiting for my mermaid tail smh.
"I'll take the Chicken"
Asked my friend on AOL Instant Messenger if vagina smell like tuna. Copied & pasted to send to someone else. Dad hops on the computer later and hits Paste. I said I didn't know anything about that, despite my screen name (which contained my nickname) being listed. My family also never talked about sex in any way or even referenced physical attraction.
There was a girl in school whose last name was Anger. I made a joke about her family having anger issues and she started crying. I got so scared of getting in trouble that I also started crying. Just two kids crying across from each other in the cafeteria. Then a teacher came over and just told everyone else to let us cry it out.
When I was five or six, my parents had company over for dinner. Before we ate, mom asked if anyone wanted to say grace. We never said grace, but when everyone was quiet for a second, I said I would, and when given the go ahead, I pledged allegiance to the flag.
Honestly my home life was very... vanilla. So my childhood I spent trying to figure out where my YA MC traits would be which led to a lot of really cringe-y periods trying out different stereotypes. I hated having such a boring life, but in retrospect it was fine.
I accidentally caused the (at the time) bratty neighbor girl to fall off her bike and skin her knee pretty bad. We'd had issues for awhile at that point, and I stuck out my arm as she went by yelling mean things at me, and she wiped out. I didn't mean for her to fall and get hurt, and I still feel bad about it today. That said, we were okay after that, and she's grown into one of the sweetest people out there and just a great person all around. But oh man, I still cringe about that. I really never intended for her to fall, and I know it was just a skinned knee, but that stuff does hurt pretty good.
As a kid in the 90s me and my rag tag team of misfits were bored looking for things to do in tie neighborhood. We thought it was a good idea to pull our trousers down and run around the neighborhood.
One day we decided to do this while spreading our buttcheeks.
One of my friends didn't wipe his bum properly and we were caught by a traumatized security guard shortly after.
"Everyone but Me..."
In 4th grade I auditioned for the school talent show. I wanted to do a gymnastics routine, because I thought I was awesome at it, even though I had never had a class or anything. But I could do a cartwheel! And a somersault!
Just before it was my turn, another girl who was REALLY good and actually had lessons did a routine to the exact same song I was going to use! They called me out next, and I wanted to walk off but went for it, and did my series of random bad dancing and cartwheels. It was terrible, and halfway through I just stopped and said I was done.
They posted the list the next day of who would be in the talent show. Everyone's name was on it but mine.
"When you gotta go..."
Once when I was either 3 or 4 my mother let me skip school to go to a friend's house. When I was at her house she was showing me the upstairs. She then showed me the upstairs bathroom and said to me, "I heard when guys pee they stand ON the toilet! Imagine if a girl did that?!" So I lifted up the toilet seat, stood on the toilet, pulled down my pants, and PEED all over her! I didn't even say sorry cause I was little and stupid and thought what I did was cool and normal.
She ended up cleaning the floor and drying herself off (since she didn't have time to take a shower). Luckily she didn't tattle on me but I do remember her saying to me "We will not tell ANYONE about this!!!" Her mother then walked in asking why she smelled so bad. I then went home not saying a word. Whenever I think of this, I feel like moving to another planet.
"Meow..."happy cat GIF Giphy
During my "cat obsession" phase in middle school, where I acted like a cat, I jumped on the back of a taller girl who refused to get out of my way even after I said "excuse me". I hissed and clawed at her trying to get her butt to move.
I only got off with a warning for it, though. Ultimate power move, right there.
We had a French teacher who would always compare us to french kids saying things like: "French kids don't behave like this" "French kids are amazing" "French kids know how to listen" "You English kids always misbehave, french kids aren't like this"
After a few months of this, me being genuinely curious, said to her in front of the whole class "miss, if you like french kids so much why don't you go back to France and teach them instead?"
I was genuinely wondering why you would move to a country and teach kids you hate so much if the ones back home are so amazing. Looking back though I realize how offensive that was.
So yeah, that's the story of how I told my teacher to go back to her own country. 🤦.
Made a stupid comment online and the week after that the FBI was at our door.
"Don't be Racist"
I told a boy I really liked that I couldn't go out with him because my dad told me that it was against the Bible and I believed him (I'm white he was black). I've never forgotten him and I want to punch myself in the face every time I think of how hurtful that had to be to hear. Forget parents who teach their kids racist crap. My daughter recently brought her black girlfriend to my dad's house, it was lovely. :)
4th grade. We had a local artist come and teach us how to use oil pastels and draw some fish. Anyways she's showing us examples and I was impressed. They looked so realistic! I raised my hand and asked in all seriousness if the fish was dead. I MEANT, was it real. It looked so realistic. Not that it looked like she painted a dead fish. I saw this disdain in her eyes and she just sat there for a second before asking for another question.
I did not know how to zip my pants after peeing in first grade when i asked to go out. So there I was entering the class with my zipper wide open and asking my teacher to zip it for me. The class watched, thanks God that everybody was dumb back then.
If I needed a tissue while I was in bed at night, instead of getting up to find one, I wiped my boogers on the back of my unicorn poster.
Out of sight, out of mind, because six-year-olds don't really think about consequences.
Of course, one day it finally tore away from the thumb tacks that held it to the wall and revealed a very diverse collection of dried-up boogers. EW.
"Armed Response"arms party hard GIF Giphy
I asked my dad to break my arm because I wanted a cast, and got mad when he refused...
I tried forming a holy brotherhood in high school. Managed to recruit classmate, one lunchtime when we were walking with our rosaries in hand, an upperclassman came and put me in a chokehold for about 20 seconds, whole time i was saying "i forgive you" and my fellow member just stood there saying "its alright".
Right then and there i realized times changed since the 1960's. Few months after it was all about them witches. But i always cringe about the choking part, like really bro? "I forgive you"? Ugh.
First or second grade 'music' class (so, 6 or 7 years old), we were supposed to hold hands with the classmates on either side of us, for whatever reason, to sing some stupid little song. I absolutely hated being touched, let alone being forced to hold someone else's clammy, sweaty little hand. I loudly stated I was a virgin and wasn't going to be touched.
I don't remember the fallout, but we were never asked to hold hands before singing again.
"The Count"dracula dead and loving it GIF Giphy
I was that kid that tried to convince everyone I was a vampire.
Bit a girl on the nose at a birthday party. Admittedly they we're mean girls and blocking me from going to the bathroom, but my response was to bite one real hard on the nose then hide in a closet until my mom came and picked me up.
Luckily it was a party for a girl I barely knew and I didn't know any of her friends so I didn't have to encounter them again at school or anything, but that memory haunts me.
I used to watch videos on how to survive the apocalypse, the Bermuda Triangle and also how to escape quick sand, I'm yet to use any of that knowledge, but when the time comes for it I'll be ready.
Since I'm actually Autistic, there is a wide array of answers I have. But, in particular, one very cringe thing I used to do was essentially flex my vocal chords; I would start by groaning quietly and slowly erupt into a yell. I thought it was hilarious. My family hated it.
I tried to shave a little bit of hair off the side of my head because i thought my side burns were uneven but didn't cut them enough to be symmetrical so my mom ended up shaving my head entirely because I had messed up my hair so bad.
This happened in my 1st/2nd grade combo class (I was in 1st grade). It was the 2nd day of school, show and tell day. There was a 2nd grade kid at my table and he had a glass dog. A glass one. Pretty cool glass dog. But little me couldn't remember the word "glass" so I said, "I like your metal dog, it's cool!".
Now the boy hates me and still does! <3
This happened in the school. I liked this guy so much that I got obsessed with him. I wrote in my diary about him, I tried to see what he was doing, I looked for him when I was in the playground... When I remember the things I did and said... OMG please kill me right now.
"Ms. Granger..."emma watson GIF Giphy
I went through a phase in 5th grade where I tried to make my hair as frizzy as possible because I thought it would make me look like Hermione Granger.
My friends and I also regularly wrote Harry Potter fan fiction (which we inserted ourselves into) and pretended to be Harry Potter characters at recess. I wish I could erase it all from my memory so I wouldn't have to acknowledge what a total weirdo I was. I also wore dresses to school everyday and occasionally spoke in a British accent for some reason.
"We hate you Victoria!"
When I was about 7 or 8 years old we took a field trip to the Field Museum here in Chicago. During our lunch break and I wandered off to the gift shop to see what they had. I had a huge crush on this girl named Victoria in my class and I saw this lady bug ring for a couple of dollars. I knew she liked lady bugs and I had money my parents gave me to buy something at the shop, so I decided to buy the ring and give it to her.
I was really nervous and kept waiting for the right time to do it. I eventually decided to just go for it and walked up to her near the end of the trip. She was with some of her friends which made me more nervous, but I found the courage to do it. She looked at the ring and laughed. Her friends joined her and she then tossed the ring in the trash.
I was completely devastated and tried hard to hold back my tears. Even though I'm over it now, that completely screwed my confidence with girls for a long time. Looking back, I may have embarrassed her too giving it to her in front of her friends, which is why she reacted that way, but even still it makes me cringe when I think about it.
Want to "know" more? Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again. Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
There's something about seeing a person litter that drives me up the wall. I remember being younger and being explicitly told to hold on to my trash and not just throw it in the street.
As a kid, I distinctly remember being made fun of for not just throwing the bag of chips I'd just eaten or an empty soda bottle into the gutter.
I can't imagine doing that. Why?! We truly treat this planet as if we have somewhere else to go. And yes, it says a lot about people who do that.
Turns out I'm not the only one with strongly held opinions. People shared their thoughts after Redditor Acrobatic_Western_67 asked the online community,
"What's something that makes you instantly dislike someone?"
"Treating food service..."
"Treating food service/retail employees like garbage for no reason."
This is a big one. Don't do it. It says a lot about you. The people who take your food orders are not personal servants.
"Standing in the middle of aisles..."
"Standing in the middle of aisles or doors, etc., and not paying attention to anyone else coming or needing to get through. Extra bonus scorn if you actually take a tone or give a dirty look when someone dares say 'excuse me.'"
Ah yes, spatial awareness. It's in such short supply.
"When they exhibit..."
"When they exhibit a personality trait that I also have, and don't like about myself. Every time I find myself being dismissive or judgemental of somebody, it's just my own insecurity."
At least you're self aware enough to recognize that, and that's a big step!
"When I'm talking..."
"When I'm talking and they are not listening. Like they are not even trying to pretend that they are listening."
Ah yes, the constant talker. Difficult to get a word in edgewise.
"A person can treat me like a princess..."
"A person can treat me like a princess but as soon as I see them mistreating either animals or people, I am out of there. Because one of these days, you'll be on that receiving end."
Honestly, good for you. You know when you've dodged a bullet.
"Telling people to smile. It just screams condescending and a lack of emotional intelligence."
Condescending indeed. I really felt for the women I worked with back when I did customer service. They heard it all the time and I could tell they hated it.
"Grown ups using 'baby talk' to try to get what they want. I'm not talking about when people goo-goo at babies, but when they use a silly whiney voice to try to persuade people or make people do them a favour."
"Aww, pwease hewp me wiv dis wittle pwoject."
"When I hear that I instantly lose respect for that person, be it a stranger or someone I know."
I cringed so hard reading this. I hope no one does that around me!
"When the first thing they do..."
"When the first thing they do when they meet me is talk bad about others. Probably to make me think they are great and it's the other people that are the problem."
Yeah... run away. Run far away. If they're talking like that when they first meet you
"One-upping people. 'Yeah, that's pretty good, but one time I...' Okay, we get it, your life is more amazing than everyone else's."
That's nothing! You should hear MY thoughts on what you just said!
See what I just did there?
"When out driving..."
"When out driving, someone who pulls out in front of you, then proceeds to go 5-10+ mph under the speed limit."
You just described a bunch of my family members. I apologize on their behalf.
It should go without saying, but I'll say it anyway: These sorts of behaviors are the kind that make other people think you're a jerk.
Don't be a jerk. Got it? Good.
Have some opinions of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.
The world has changed significantly in the last twenty years. Back in the day, you could just step out of the house and be gone all day and no one could contact you unless they were back home or used a payphone.
Nowadays, people expect us to be connected all the time, which is super frustrating in its own way. But it's hard to imagine the world as it was before, right? And it's pretty wild that we just accepted it for so long, that is until technology advanced enough!
Society has changed... for better or worse. People shared their observations after Redditor Silkhide asked the online community,
"What was the most f**ked up thing that was generally accepted twenty years ago?"
"I was knocked out cold..."
"No care or concern for concussions in sports. I was knocked out cold for two minutes on the football field, nobody told me, and when I came to we just resumed the game like nothing had happened."
"I didn’t even know I was out for those two minutes until a year later when people were telling football stories. I thought I had just gotten knocked down and got back up right away. I thought it was weird everyone was making such a big deal about it."
"My first ever depressive episode started almost immediately after that game."
Thankfully, knowledge about chronic traumatic encephalopathy (CTE) is much more widespread.
"That Oxycontin wasn’t habit forming and it was a miracle drug."
Required reading: Empire of Pain: The Secret History of the Sackler Dynasty, in case you want to feel even more enraged about the ongoing opioid crisis.
"My high school..."
"My high school had an area that we were allowed to smoke. A designated smoking area for kids under 18."
Ha! That would absolutely be met with shock and horror these days.
"Being at home..."
"Being at home at your TV at a certain time to catch a show, and expecting everyone to leave you alone so you could watch it with no interruptions."
"You could be out with friends and you'd look and say, "Oh, it's 7:30 I got to get home to catch my show!" And nobody looked at you like a strange social outcast."
Ah, those were the days. The way we had to plan for all of these things, actually plan! Remember TVGuide?
"People dying of Chronic Myloid Leukemia. 20 years ago it was 100% fatal in less than five years. Now it's treated with a once a day pill with no side effects for most people... miracle science right there."
Modern medicine is indeed amazing–and changes lives!
"Female celebrities and actresses with eating disorders such as anorexia and bulimia. It's less prevalent now, but dang was it brutal back then."
Karen Carpenter, anyone?
Talk about an emotionally devastating story.
"There's still a lot of trouble..."
"25 years ago, I had a gym teacher who did not think asthma was a thing and wouldn't let me have my inhaler at hand in class. I walked every mile because I didn't want to die."
"There's still a lot of trouble for the undiagnosed, but tons of physical and mental health issues that were downplayed or outright ignored at least have some kind of support system or protocol now. It's not perfect, but at least we know they're real and are starting to do something."
A teacher who would have the nerve to mock a student for their disability or health problems today is in for a real wake-up call.
"Nobody said anything..."
"In middle school a student dressed up like an SS Nazi for halloween. Nobody said anything until my choir teacher told him that some people may find it offensive. Teacher was Jewish."
Yeah... that sounds like something that would warrant an immediate expulsion.
"I worked in restaurants back then..."
"Sexual harassment in the workplace. It was just starting to become a topic of conversation around the early 2000s but very little progress had been made."
"I worked in restaurants back then and the amount of harassment I and my other female coworkers endured was unreal by today’s standards. We all just learned to laugh it off because no one took it seriously."
Grateful to see the culture change for the better where this is concerned, though there is still so much work to be done.
"People would go to carnivals..."
"People would go in carnivals and shove their face in the same water barrel to grab an apple with their mouth. Completely bonkers in 2021."
If COVID-19 had a Facebook, it would love, love, LOVE this.
For any of you reading... 2001 was 20 years ago. Take some pills for your back. It might hurt.
Have some observations of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.
Is it ever okay to keep a secret from your parents?
It's been said that what people don't know won't hurt them, and that can certainly depend on the circumstances. But some secrets aren't all sad, dark, and depressing. Some are quite wholesome, believe it or not!
And sometimes your parent might be in on the secret. That's right. One parent.
People were keen to share their experiences after Redditor TheCripdalorian asked the online community,
"What’s one secret you and a parent have kept from the other parental figure?"
"He fought back one day..."
"When I was 10, my older brother (12) was bullied in middle school because we were poor and wore Payless our entire lives. He fought back one day and was suspended from school. When my mom asked what happened, he didn't want to hurt her feelings so he lied."
"I told her what happened and she started to cry. The next day she took us to a shoe store and bought all three boys Nikes, which were very expensive (think Ken Griffeys). She made us promise to not tell our dad and if he asked, they were super cheap on sale."
"She bought us Nikes two times a school year even though they were way out of our budget because she didn't want us to feel s****y at school. I love you, Mom."
It's awful that we live in a world where people get judged for not wearing clothing that is fancy enough.
"The day that my mom left..."
"My stepdad and mom broke up. The day that my mom left, taking me with her, I went back into the house to say goodbye. I got along well with him, my mom is a bit crazy."
"I was young, middle school age. He was devastated and broke down (a first) crying. He told me that he had never told anyone this but the reason he had issues getting along with my mom was because he was assaulted as a child, and he was sorry. He made me promise not to tell her or anyone."
"I never did. I always wondered if I should tell her but keeping his secret was the only thing I could do for him and I still cared for him a lot so I never told anyone. I wouldn't even post it here but sadly he passed away some years ago now."
"It was really sad, he was a nice guy. But it never would have worked anyway with my mom."
You're a good person, and it probably meant the world to him.
"My Mom worked days..."
"My Mom worked days, and my Dad was on midnight shift. So meals were my Dad's responsibility that week."
"One day, instead of cooking dinner, he took me to a funeral of an old teacher of his that had passed away...so that I could eat those little sandwiches, cheese and desserts."
This makes me think of all the times we went to Costco for free samples... though nowhere near as morbid.
"My mom slipped me the money..."
"I rented Mike Tyson's Punch Out when I was in 7th grade and kept it out until I owed $47. My mom slipped me the money to pay it off so my dad wouldn't go crazy about the money, which was a LOT of money for us back then. If he'd found out, he would have prohibited me from renting games for a while."
"I don't think he knows about it even now."
This is sweet and wholesome but we bet you remembered to return games after that!
"My dad and I would wrestle..."
"My dad and I would wrestle for fun. He would pretend to let me win, then he would get sudden strength and throw me into the couch. Well on this particular day, he mistimed his throw and yeeted me into the end table. I was fine….but the lamp on the table was not. We cleaned it up and went to the antique store to buy a really similar lamp. Mom never figured it out."
My favorite part of this story is that it's a really similar lamp!
"First time I got drunk..."
"First time I got drunk at a party. I was hammered and was scared to take a cab. Then I remembered my mom telling me I could always call her for help and she’d be there with no consequences."
"I called her and she picked me up. All she did was make sure I was safe and had enough water to not get as bad a hangover as I was going to. No blaming me for waking her up at 3 am, no chiding just telling me she was proud of me for calling her for help."
"My dad, who’d most likely have a panic attack at the thought of me having been drunk, still thinks I was picked up because I was sleepy instead."
Parenting done right – good to hear that you can trust your mother!
"Now that my brothers and I are all adults..."
"Well, my parents divorced when I was quite young, and around age 14 I happened upon a substantial stash of pot in my mom's house. She wasn't angry about it or anything, and I knew she wasn't a stoner or anything, it was just a one-time thing she'd gotten from a friend."
"But as she correctly pointed out, if I ever told my dad he would do everything in his power to get full custody of me, and I wouldn't get to live with her anymore."
"Now that my brothers and I are all adults I can tell that story all I want, but yeah, I kept that secret."
Divorces can be very acrimonious. It sounds like you did the right thing here.
"That I'm the one..."
"I’m the one who got those massive dents in the back of the car when I was 17… backing into the OTHER car they owned. It was not a parallel parking hit and run."
Yeah... it sounds like it'd be best to keep this one to yourself. What they don't know won't hurt them, right?
"I got lucky..."
"I got lucky and found a Wii for Christmas the year it came out. But it was for me from my parents. Anyways, one day I'm home from school and Dad was home from work. We opened it, played Wii sports all day and put it back before Mom came home."
This is such a sweet and wholesome memory!
"The gingerbread cookies..."
"The gingerbread cookies on the balcony... Yeah, some of it was eaten by the birds, but not all of it. Sorry mom!"
You little rascal! She should have known!
Some of these stories are sweet and others saddening. Regardless, many people have their reasons not to tell their parents things. Mum's the word.
Have some stories of your own? Feel free to tell us about them in the comments section below!
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.
Whether it's a fad product from Instagram or something for that hobby you just know you'll start doing one day, it's easy to buy things that seem useful and then just never use them.
Redditor Doctor_Disaster asked:
"What is something that you have purchased in the past, but have never used once since then?"
Never Gonna Make That Telescope
"On a trip to Chicago at about age 14 to visit the museums, my parents bought for me a telescope mirror grinding kit from the Adler Planetarium which I desperately wanted. It had all the components needed to construct a 6" mirror for a beautiful reflector scope. I kept that kit until I was about 50 years old, moving from apartment to apartment and city to city, until I finally decided I probably just wasn't gonna make that telescope."
You Probably Don't Need The Book
"College textbooks, as a freshman you think you need them but it’s a scam most of the time. Just get the pdf online tbh. I’ve even had professors that strongly hint at a textbook being available online and for students not to buy it."
"I had a professor complaining and complaining that a mass anonymous email went out to all his students with a pdf of the text book. He just kept asking if 'everyone saw it and how terrible it was… but everyone saw it right? Everyone… did anyone miss it or not get it… that terrible anonymous email sent too ALL of his students got'"
"He was a good dude lol."
"I bought a book on methods to tackle procrastination, 7 years ago. It remains unread though I’m sure the methods within are glorious."
"On page 1 it just says, 'Congratulations! You have taken the first step towards conquering procrastination! Now just keep taking one step at a time!' Or some other cheesy stuff like that."
Bye Bye Bicycle
"Not me but my dad - bought a bicycle he never used, a year rolled by and the shop he bought it from called him and asked if he wanted it serviced, to which he agreed. Still hadn’t used it. I went to his place one day and saw the bike and asked if I can borrow it. He then tells me this story and said I can have it. Thanks dad!"
"I bought a wacom pad like a year ago cause i wanted to start drawing. Never got around to start learning."
"You know, I got one to use as a mouse. I know that sounds crazy, but I was starting to get some RSI in my hand from constant mouse use at work and home."
"No lie - once I got over the first 24 hours of it being awkward as a daily pointing device, I quickly realized that I by far preferred using it to the alternatives. When you're over the learning curve it starts to feel so much more precise. It always got me funny looks and questions when co-workers stopped by my desk, since my roles never had anything to do with illustration or design."
"Absolutely useless for anything game related, mind you. But day to day document/office/browser/other stuff? Super useful. Maybe give it a try."
Time For A Game Nightfilm opening GIFGiphy
"*Looks at the shelves of unplayed board games*"
"One day, the perfect group of people will be assembled in your house and ready to play that game... Until that day it sits on the shelf awaiting its time."
"Containers to get myself organised. Months ago. And now I’m on reddit. Not being organised."
"At least now, when you someday get the urge to organize your stuff, you will have the containers ready & be able to just do it."
You Mean You're Not Supposed To Just Collect Them?
"I'd like to introduce you to my steam library."
"Me: there are no games to play."
"Steam library: *sad game noises*"
Banger BanjoSloth Banjo GIFGiphy
"When I got my job back in April after a 3 year attempt at freelancing, my first pay check was the most exciting."
"I bought a banjo. I'm a city boy in the UK. I have no idea how to play instruments."
"To this day it stays in the corner of my room getting an occasional twang when I get a little spicy."
"Yarn, so much yarn."
"Yes, I am more a yarn collector than a knitter."
It's not too late to use that thing you bought forever ago and forgot about. It's never too late to pick up that hobby or read that book!
Want to "know" more?
Sign up for the Knowable newsletter here.
Never miss another big, odd, funny, or heartbreaking moment again.