I hate to be asked if I need help while shopping. Like, I detest it with a passion.
I can't explain why. Most of the time I have music going in my ears or at least pretending to so the retail stalkers will leave me in peace.
I don't hate the workers specifically, I just hate the sentiment. If I need an assist... I'll ask.
So it's always mind boggling to me to come across people who relish the attention or stores who insist on having staff be a step away from Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction.
To each their own, as the shopper's guide says.
Redditor Mizu3 wanted to discuss all the simple things in life some of us just get connect with by asking:"What's a very common thing that you just can't relate to?"
Let me Eat
"Restaurants that force their staff to act, sing or engage in fake banter. Just make my food please and leave the theatre to the thespians."
Puff Puff Puff....
"Smoking, nearly everyone in my family and all my friends smoke."
"Nobody smoked in my family so I never viewed it as a "normal" thing to do. I always viewed smoking as a bad and kind of pointless habit, because that's what I was taught I guess. It's kind of sad that the people who told you that had that attitude, as if becoming a smoker is unavoidable."
"I went to a big 10 college, I swear everyone was having the time of their life but me. I couldn't wait to graduate."
"I feel this so hard. I went to a big college because my best friend was going. Turns out I'm way more introverted than I thought I was in high school. We basically went from friends to acquaintances in like 3 months and I was stuck at a school I hated."
the sounds of silence....
"Being quiet late at night when your parents are asleep. My parents are deaf."
"Damn. What a life. Not being afraid of being heard. Well - not by your parents at least, idk about siblings. So many possibilities."
Life on Tape....
"Sharing your whole, intimate life on facebook/tiktok/instagram/etc. It's just gross."
"A coworker of mine posts no less than 3 hours worth of video onto his Snapchat daily. Every single meal he cooks and eats, every single time he feeds his turtles, every single walk he takes with his dog. It's insanity."
Through the Curls....
"Running a brush through my hair. I have very curly hair so only finger brush it when it's wet which isn't often. Seeing people grab a brush and run it through their hair when they've been in the wind or just to 'freshen up'... I wish!! My dad is who I got my curls from and so he knew to brush from the tips to the roots whereas my mum didn't and would try getting a brush through from root to tip! I once had a hairdresser brush my hair while it was dry and I was holding back tears the whole time (I was too shy to say anything). Then there was always kids at school wanting to straighten it 🙄."
I Do - We Don't
"Big expensive weddings."
"Best thing about 2020 for me is that we didn't have a £25k wedding but instead had a £500 wedding with just us and our parents."
"Getting upset with people for things they are not in control of."
"Having dreams and aspirations, I never thought I'd get to be an adult so I never had dreams. Btw thanks for the awards guys, I've never gotten so many so I appreciate all of you! <3"
"22, this year made me stop and suddenly I started to question myself why I do what I do, crap is scary man, I don't know me lmao."
"Edit: Thanks for the replies, made me realize that while I'm kinda lost, I'm in the right path to find myself. Wish you the best this 2021."
These Low Effort Jobs Have Surprisingly High Salaries | George Takei’s Oh MyyyHave you ever worked one of those jobs that paid you to kinda sit there? If you have, you know the joy that comes with watching the entirety of Breaking Bad ...
It's Just Cloth
"The obsession with branded things. Clothes with the brand's name on them just look tacky for me. I'd much rather have a regular old graphic tee instead of a t-shirt with Gucci on the front in gigantic bold capital letters. It's pretty whatever most of the time, wear what you want and all that, but the obsession becomes incredibly annoying when people act like they're better than you because they spend several hundred dollars on a single shirt."
It's all Crap
"Keeping up with the Jones's"
"I don't give a crap how nice or shiny your things are or mine aren't."
"That trope where the husband is a useless piece of lazy crap who couldn’t possibly feed himself or care for the kids and house without your divine feminine guidance. It used to make me feel bad like am I supposed to be running this crap by myself while my man just lies on the couch after work? But then I realized no it’s the trope thats crappy. It’s everywhere though and women think it’s somehow cute or empowering to perpetuate it." ~ KayaXiali
"People taking out loans for their wedding expenses. One of the number one reasons people get a divorce is money. No better way to start off your marriage than in debt, I guess?" ~ spanman112
"Thinking that being an idiot is funny." ~ SasugayUchiha
"People who think being an a**hole is funny, I think, just crave any attention they can get. I have an uncle who’s an a**hole on the outside but deep down is really caring but to me it just seems like he never learned how to express his emotions and feels he’s protecting himself by being a fool." ~ exusemepo
"The requirement of drama I've met so many people who are always in the midst of some drama, and then, when lacking in it, create it for themselves, they thrive off it. I mean, at a push I can understand it to an extent, (it gives their lives meaning possibly?) but then they try and drag people like myself into their drama. I THINK, THE HECK, NOT!" ~ MidnightStorm03
"Speaker phone in public. I barely even want to take a normal call anywhere in public with a whispered tone." ~ ACDunneComedy Reaction GIF by Bayerischer RundfunkGiphy
We’ve got this.
"Having a task to do and just doing it. I have depression and many simple tasks feel like walking with glass in my shoe. I know I can do them, and should, but I often just can’t."
"EDIT: I’m really grateful for all the awards and upvotes and for people reaching out. I’m doing pretty well lately, for those that expresses concern. I’m especially encouraged that more than five thousand people found this relatable in some way. It sucks that we’ve all struggled, but it’s so great to be reminded that you aren’t alone. You aren’t some freak or failure. At least 5000 other people have had the same struggle. Keep fighting friends. We’ve got this." ~ theatrew**re
"The level of excitement people get about watching sports. I appreciate that for some people it's a phenomenal event to see, worthy of unbridled shows of joy and anger (depending on the outcome). But it just doesn't have any importance or appeal for me." ~ ToBePacific
fighting is optional...
"Fighting/yelling/hostility in relationships with my significant other. It could very well stem from my childhood, I guess. It’s not to say we don’t have disagreements or the relationship is flawless but obstacles always have been resolved without much issue. Fortunately this held true with all of my romantic relationships. I’ve always lived by the saying 'conflict is inevitable, fighting is optional.'" ~ the_good_old_daze
"Taking and sharing pictures of everything. Except for when I'm travelling, I take maybe twenty pics a year." ~ A40
"My boyfriend is like this, he very rarely takes pictures. I used to be too but I lost someone last year and realised I didn’t have one picture with them and it broke my heart so I promised myself that I’d take more pictures. I don’t understand people that take pictures of everything, but I do try to capture moments, not to post on social media but just so I have them if I ever lost that person." ~ cousin_it13Just For Laughs Reaction GIFGiphy
"Loving and wanting to spend time with your family. Had a terrible awful childhood, as an adult just lots of toxic interactions whenever anyone from my family got involved in my life so all cut off. When I see people posting about their family and how much they love them, I just don't understand it. I don't understand my fiancé missing his mom etc. I know I'm the anomaly, but just cant relate in anyway." ~ Lostinmoderation
We all relate to our environment in different ways.
Don't like something?
That's fine—you do you.
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The key to any successful relationship is communication.
The ability to be open and receptive to what a significant other has to say, as well as the ability to be able to convey something weighing on one's mind, can be healing.
But depending on the circumstance, some things are better left unsaid.
Curious to hear examples of what those might be, Redditor FamiliarFarmer8356 asked:
"What's something you wish you could tell your partner without upsetting them?"
If there is conflict, there is a way to discuss and address the issue in a civil and respectful manner.
Things Just Happen
"Every bad thing that happens doesn't require someone to be blamed for it. And that someone doesn't always have to be me."
A Cornerstone Of A Successful Union
"One of the cornerstones of a good marriage, is knowing how to argue. I’d actually say that before a couple get married, they should check how their potential partner behaves in an argument. What are they like when they get angry. It’s important because no two individuals are going to agree all the time. And on those occasions, it’s important to remember not to belittle the other. Deal with the issue at hand. And especially, don’t argue in front of the kids. You have no idea how much lasting damage this causes."
"All married couples should learn the art of battle as they should learn the art of making love. Good battle is objective and honest - never vicious or cruel. Good battle is healthy and constructive, and brings to a marriage the principles of equal partnership."
It's Not That Deep
"please stop complaining about everything."
"If you keep seeking out reasons to be miserable, you will find them."
"I'm tired of being dragged down with you."
There's no need to get defensive when there's something to discuss.
It's Not About You
"That some days I’m just tired from class and work and just want some me time, it’s not that I hate you my social battery is just running out."
"Her first reaction to something adverse doesn't have to be anger."
In The Words Of A Pirate
"In the wise words of captain Jack Sparrow sometimes:"
'the problem is not the problem, the problem is your attitude toward the problem.'
It Takes Two To Tango
"That I wish she’d be more independent so she didn’t need my help for everything outside the house."
"That it’s a little disturbing how aggressively he drives when he’s grumpy… heavy on both gas and brakes, zooming in and out of traffic, swearing at people who make mistakes… very unlike him."
Sometimes the truth hurts when talking about members of the family.
A Real Assessment
"That her mother is not a good person."
"I told my husband that it's not that his family is nosy and overbearing, it's that I hate watching him cave and negotiate as if they have a right to behave like this, and I really hate when I'm the bad guy for wanting reasonable limits."
"It got worse, then it got better, FYI."
"His parents are greedy, selfish people and treat him like an atm."
There's definitely a fine line between withholding your thoughts to protect the person you love and being brutally honest.
If coming clean isn't going to resolve an issue, then it might be better to suck it up and deal with whatever frustrations you have about the other person.
It's up to you, but make sure the delivery doesn't come from a place of rage if you do decided to be totally transparent about your negative thoughts.
Every family has a black sheep or every family in its entirety are black sheep.
What is a "black sheep" anyway?
It used to mean a person who brought shame or embarrassment to a family, but it's more often used now to mean the member who is just very different from everyone else—sometimes in a good way.
Redditor Frozen_yoghurt123 asked:
"Who is the 'black sheep' of your family?"
I'm the black sheep or at least I'd like to think so.
"Probably my dad's cousin, who went to prison for murdering his lover's husband."
DW_555Oh My Wow GIFGiphy
"My Dad. He is the only one of 6 siblings who wasn't a huge f**k up. And yet, before my Grandma died she stated that he was her 'biggest disappointment.' He is estranged from his surviving siblings... not by his choice. It honestly blows my mind."
"Toxicity is often a group mindset thing; people don't want you to leave because they are dysfunctionally co-dependent on each other and need each other to justify their own shortcomings in life. A lot of the 'family loyalty' stuff is typically shouted loudest by those who are the least good idea to stay loyal towards."
"My great uncle who stole my great grandfathers identity, stole a couple million dollars, and ran off. No one even knew he was alive until my great grandfathers funeral in 2009. No one has seen him since. My grandma started to cry because she honestly thought he was dead."
"Everyone else just kind of nodded on his direction and went on with the rest of the funeral. I just remember being very confused because I was 9 and I had never met this guy who my dad pulled me aside and told me he was my great uncle. It was a few years later that I got the full story."
"According to my mean aunt, the 'matriarch' in her own mind, it's my twin brother because "he doesn't care about family now that he's a doctor." (He's a resident. Chief resident. He works ridiculous hours and spends the rest of the time recovering from work.)"
"According to my ex-MIL (who still counts because she's Son's grandma), it's me, for divorcing her son."
"According to everyone else, it's Mean Aunt. The rest of us are warm and caring and compassionate. We have our moments; all of us have been accidentally thoughtless or done something selfish once in a while, but we're not deliberately mean and snarky all the time."
"My immediate family are the black sheep of the entire family."
DarthDreganJohn Stamos Cheers GIF by GrandfatheredGiphy
Sounds like everyone has a little black sheep in them.
"By now, my brother for cutting off everyone because he prefers his rude, selfish, paranoid, narcissist wife over all of us."
"My wife is the black sheep of her family in the sense that she's the only one who isn't a rude, selfish, paranoid narcissist."
Lvcivs2311Joe Dirt Brother GIFGiphy
"Me. My granddaddy told me 'I’ve only had the sheriff knock on my door two times in my 80 years, and both times he was looking for you! 'I did some dumb sh*t, caused a little trouble, burned a few bridges but always managed to stay out of jail. Partly because my sister has kept an attorney on retainer for me since I was 16."
"My younger brother (2nd of 4) is a compulsive liar and it got him in a lot of little trouble as a teen, then he told his wife he graduated a big college when we're not even sure if he got his GED because he failed to graduate HS, went to some GED school and eventually just stopped going."
"IF he graduated college, he never mentioned he was going in the 4+ years it takes nor mention graduation or have a diploma. He's not a bad dude, but now family time is super awkward when he and his wife are talking about 'their' college team."
The NOT good girl...
"My aunt's daughter. She’s been in jail for drugs, stolen money from my aunt and other family members to use on drugs and physically abused my aunt. My aunt has tried getting her help, but nothing has worked. She’s just not a good person, and everyone in my family, except my aunt, doesn’t want anything to do with her. I haven’t seen her in 8 years now, and I’m happy about that."
"A former nun - my great aunt - left the religious life and got married. She called herself 'the black sheep of the family' because her habit was black."
Back2BachExcited Julie Andrews GIF by The Rodgers & Hammerstein OrganizationGiphy
Well the black sheep sound like the most interesting family members.
Sex is great, but there are more ways than one to accomplish that euphoric feeling without sex.
There are so many small, ordinary aspects of life that can just send a person and we come across them daily.
A good steak.
A home repair.
The things that make you say...
"I tingle all over."
Redditor OldAboba asked:
"What is the best non-sexual physical feeling you’ve ever felt?"
Adele. Adele live. She sends me.
FloatingRelaxed Exit Strategy GIF by Hannah Bronfman Giphy
"I got a professional full body (everything but my man parts) massage a few years back for the first and so far only time at a spa after the recommendation from a coworker. I felt like I was floating on a cloud for the next few days."
Through your nose...
"Sneezing when you're sick. Then you get that about 20 second feeling of breathing through your nose again and you like ahh that's what I aspire to at the moment."
"Or the very last sneeze of your illness. During a fire drill in high school, I was ambling out after fighting a head old for a few days. The alarm was killing my head which was already throbbing from the sinus pressure."
"I was nearing the field, well away from my classmates, when I cough/sneezed out a huge, green loogie - cleared it about three feet, no icky trail - and by the time I was walking back to the building I was feeling pretty much back to normal. No more head cold after that. Never had something like that ever happen again where there was such an abrupt end to the head cold."
"Right after a migraine goes away. It's almost a spiritual experience."
"This was going to be my answer. I was in the ER one time for a really bad migraine. They gave me what they called a 'migraine cocktail.' When they pushed it through the IV I could feel the cold liquid make its way through my body, up to my head. Once it hit my brain, the migraine was gone. It was pure ecstasy. Even better was that cocktail had Benadryl in it so I fell asleep not long after and slept so good."
"That stretch til you shake when you wake up."
"I once stretched too hard in the morning and got the worst calf cramp ever... it looked like a prune and I thought I would die from the pain. Couldn't stretch in bed for months afterwards out of fear it would happen again."
"When you move over 50, it turns into that stretch til you put your back into a muscle spasm that lasts days."
The ItchScratching Feel Good GIF by 60 Second DocsGiphy
"I had a cast and splint on both my legs for 2 months. When they cut it off, they scratched my legs for me and the itch was just top notch! Yeah."
Itching an itch can change a life.
YUM!Emma Stone High Quality GIFGiphy
"When you're starving all day and devour a bomb a** meal."
Sleep for Life
"When you’ve been up for 20 hours+ and finally get into bed and you just know it’ll be the best sleep of your life."
"But man, after 36+ hours, the body sort of aches and it's hard to fall asleep despite being completely exhausted. Then the restless legs kick in... ugh. I do agree that a 20hr-ish stint is amazing to cuddle into, especially if you don't have to get up at any specific time the next day."
"Makes it better when you’ve been sleep deprived for weeks and know you have NO PLANS tomorrow and can sleep as much as you need."
"When you're absolutely busting for a pee and you can finally go!"
"Apparently there’s a thing called a 'pee-gasm' that people (usually women) have that causes an orgasmic feeling when you pee after holding it for a while! I’ve definitely experienced this and I’ve intentionally waited a while so I could have that good feeling... lol."
I Can Hear!!
"The feeling of water leaving your ear after being there all day."
"I had some impacted earwax for a week in one ear, and when it finally got removed it was the best feeling in the world. Initially it was like having a tv or radio in my ear that only had static, but then I could hear. Good god, I could hear. It was amazing."
"Oh man, and it’s WARM from being in your head, and the warmth makes the sensation of leaving even better."
A Good Restdog puppy GIFGiphy
"Sleeping in a warm blanket in winters."
"Or sleeping in a cold blanket in summer."
I am enthralled by all of those things.
People need to stop throwing out unwanted advice.
And when it is requested, think before you speak.
People with mental disorders don't need everyone telling them they have a fix like "exercise" or "herbal supplements."
Redditor Gold-Ad-2827 asked:
"People with mental disorders: What do you hate being told the most?"
I hated being told to just smile. You smile and go away.
Duhseth meyers GIF by Late Night with Seth MeyersGiphy
"It's all in your head. Where else would it?! My colon?"
"Everybody goes through that."
"This saying makes my blood boil. Or the 'I was that age once too ya know' yeah no sh*t you were that age once. And just because you were that age once doesn’t mean we have the same experience."
"They try to minimize it."
"You're worried? Just stop."
"You're sad? Just don't be."
"You're compulsively binge eating? Eat less."
"Thanks for that stellar advice."
"Or even better, 'Just do it!' As if ADHD paralysis can be stopped with a can-do attitude."
"I get so frustrated when people treat the idea of 'holistic medicine' as some kind of woo. How does it escape so many people that the body works holistically? Even a lot of doctors seem to ignore this. It's very frustrating when you have 2 or 3 or 4 illnesses that are all affecting each other, and your 'physical health' is held distinct from your mental health, and nothing anyone is doing to treat you works because no one's looking at the whole system."
"I just got a lecture from a psychiatrist I am seeing about nutrition, and he apologized to me for doing so but I told him, 'No, I appreciate it. Do it for all your patients.' because it told me he's trying to look at the whole picture and actually fix what's wrong. It gave me faith in him."
RelaxCalm Down Golden Girls GIF by TV LandGiphy
"You need to calm down."
"Never is the history of calm down has calm down ever caused anyone to calm down."
Calm down. I hate that one. You calm down.
TipsSeason 23 Reaction GIF by Law & OrderGiphy
"When they try to give me tips on what to do, like bruh as if I didn't already try that."
"You don't look sad. No crap... that's so I can avoid having this conversation. Also depression isn't 'being sad' like people think."
"God, I hate this. It's because saying 'I'm depressed' has been standard for people expressing that they're slightly unhappy about something dumb like not getting enough croutons on their salad or some crap. Now that's just what everyone assumes you mean when you say you have depression."
"'Stop being lazy.'"
“'Lazy' is when you don’t want to do anything at all. 'Executive disfunction' is when you can do everything at all, but that one easy quick thing that you do want to do just makes you and your brain freeze completely days ahead. I’m tired of people not understand that even when I explain and look at me like I’m bullshitting instead."
Ways to Cope
"Maybe you should try praying harder. I did, He prescribed medication."
"Praying is a way to cope for a lot of people, I think. That's totally fine, but insisting on praying in lieu of getting real help or actually addressing the issue is when it is not only unhelpful, but dangerously detrimental."
"Religious people will bypass everyone’s cultures, identity, views, and feelings just to be right and make a point. it’s disgusting. I read somewhere that real so called Christianity is all wrong. The real faith is from the Aramaic history and all the meanings were misinterpreted and the stories and all were made up by Catholics wanting to control their people. Yuck."
'contamination'Disgusted Season 6 GIF by Brooklyn Nine-NineGiphy
"As someone with OCD with a lot of attention to 'contamination', having someone try to explain contradictions in why I'm doing something that is technically unclean when I wouldn't do something that is technically clean due to OCD. There are a few doorknobs that I will not touch no matter how much you clean them in front of me and I know it makes no sense, if it made sense I wouldn't have OCD i'd just be cleanly."
Stop trying to be an armchair therapist. Be empathetic to people first.