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People Describe The Weirdest Things About The Early Internet

People Describe The Weirdest Things About The Early Internet
Image by andreas160578 from Pixabay

Since its advent way back in the 1960s and its popularization in the 1990s, the internet has long departed its primitive roots and become the most influential technology to grace the human race since the printing press.


With every passing year, the capabilities of just a few years before seem quaint, slow, and clunky.

What used to be an interconnected network of documents using fax machine technology is now a robust invisible universe that facilitates sweeping political action, allows for the creation of multi billion dollar corporations, and even exerts long-term influence on our personal neurochemistries.

It's so easy to take the latest advancements for granted. Some Redditors took a momentary step back and reflected on the earliest days of the internet, before it had already changed the world.

They recalled the silliest idiosyncracies they could.

DevilYouKnow asked, "What was the weirdest part of the early internet?"

Absolute Chaos

"The early days of CSS & HTML with cursor effects, far too many different fonts, visitor counters on every website, inexplicable scrolling text, animated gifs everywhere, etc."

"It was an assault on the senses, but it was also glorious!"

-- TransientSignal

When it was Small Enough

"How AOL didn't use URLs. Every 'website' had a keyword, meaning that every topic literally only had one website."

"I remember when Nickelodeon would constantly promote themselves on TV and said 'Log on to AOL keyword 'Nick!' meaning that that was literally the only place you could see Nickelodeon content."

-- redxrain86

"Fast" is a Relative Term 

"Starting a download before you went to bed so it would be done when you got up the next morning." -- Nightdave

"I've had my taste of that recently. A friend broke his phone so hard, the only thing that still worked to get his files out was Bluetooth. Estimated transfer time to my PC: 9 hours."

"Felt just like downloading Empire Earth again." -- Allegutennamenweg

The Wild West

"I must be older than anyone here, because the 'early days' of the internet was back when years still started with 19. And there were NO RULES."

"There was no online tracking, no ad-bots, just no enforcement of any kind. Essentially the internet then was what the dark net is now. Anything could be found, but only if you knew where to look."

"Search engines we're all but useless and nothing was protected for sh**. A few hours in a dumpster full of paper could get you access to nearly anything."

"That was the early days of the internet."

-- jk013x

A Little Too Interconnected 

"Telling people not to use the phone because you were on the internet." -- omegaclick

"Downloading a big file when someone picks up the phone. Fffffffffff" -- 1019throw2

"Mom, hang up! I'm on the Internet!!!!" -- philpalmer2

First to Market

"Who here remembers Netscape Navigator being the best browser?" -- UndeadWarlord

"Oh god, I hung on to using it way longer than I'd like to admit!" -- BootlegMickeyMouse

"Just yesterday I was signing up for an account on a company's site and on their recommended software for viewing the site they had Netscape still listed." -- rhen_var

Digitized Rascals

"My friend's mom's reaction when I replaced AOL's 'you've got mail' with 'you've got porn'" -- UndeadWarlord

"I replaced mine with the 'You just got a letter' song from Blue's Clues." -- KnockMeYourLobes

"I had the twang 'message for you sir' from Monty Python and the Holy Grail." -- house_autumn

Before it Owned the World

"Amazon was still a bookstore." -- HumongousBratwurst

"And it would list the best selling books in your location." -- Roche77e

"And it used to have a little monkey swinging on a vine as it's logo" -- watchman28

"My Amazon account, created in early 2001, is older than Billie Eilish..." -- Knauserer

Pining for Old Simplicity

"I dunno. But, I really miss the way recipes used to be shared online. No scrolling through a giant website of background story of the recipe and countless ads."

"It was literally just the text of the recipe, with comments under of how to tweak that recipe."

"We were so spoiled by the simplicity and immediacy of ingredient lists back then and we didn't even know it."

-- rawsugar87

Quite the Scheme 

"People printing porn at the library" -- Chunky0P

"Ahem. I had myself a little system."

"I couldn't do it now, but I managed to learn how to read normal text printed in Cyrillic font. Not a different language -- literally just the English text printed in Cyrillic font.

"At the time I couldn't possibly have got hold of a private printer, or indeed a private computer where I could... err... be myself. The University printers at the time were all run by actual staff and you had to collect and pay for your printouts from them."

"My little system allowed me to print out lots of alt.sex.stories content on the University printers and when collecting, claim to my dismay that the printout went a bit wrong, and aww shucks I guess I'd better just pay for the failed printout and I'll take it and use it to wrap fish or something." -- IcyCrust

A Contemporary Edison

"My step dad made a 'receiver' to steal the neighbour's internet out of a strainer covered in tinfoil."

"I'm sure there was more to it but that's how my 12 year old brain perceived it."

-- RyuksShadow

Outdated Selling Points

"Idk how weird it is, but does anyone remember the early Road Runner internet commercials where the spokesman bragged about the size of their internet cables compared to dial up?"

-- CrashRiot

Needed a Whole Extra 30 Seconds

"Driving in the car and hearing radio commercials explain how to spell the URL."

"'Now kids, ask your parents for permission to log on and type 'h t t p colon two forward slashes (that's the one that goes up from left to right) double u double u double u dot (that's the period)...'"

-- jaa928

Informed Downloading

"There were websites that posted videos, and they'd describe what's in the video, and how big it is."

"So you'd be able to decide if it's worth waiting an hour to watch it."

-- SensiSparx

Tread Lightly 

"All the random sh** on Limewire under completely different titles" -- pdxblazer

"Limewire was horribly dangerous." -- archavex

"That was like going into a wild orgy without a condom. So many virtual STDs. I think I had Norton antivirus at the time." -- P_elquelee

End of an Era

"I think it's a tie. Either trying to download something like "Barbie Girl" on limewire to make a mix CD you could bring to summer camp and after waiting 10 hours for it download you find out it's just an audio clip of Bill Clinton saying "I did not have sexual relations with that woman" and having to start all over again."

"OR, it was playing what you assumed was a basic flash maze game or maybe watching a sweet music video that your friend sent you only to be terrified by a picture of Regan from the exorcist popping up and screaming at you when you least expect it."

"Between those two and the Ally McBeal dancing baby, I think that covers all my early experiences of the internet."

-- Walkinginspace4

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Things Left-Handed People Deal With That Right-Handed People Never Do

Reddit user johnnyportillo95 asked: 'What’s something left handed people have to deal with that right handed people wouldn’t even think about?'

Left-handed person holding a Sharpie
Kelly Sikkema/Unsplash

Many of us who are right-handed never even think about how the world is designed to cater to us.

It probably doesn't even cross your mind that 10% of the world's population is left-handed.

Because of this, there tends to be a stigma for being left-handed since society tends to associate the left with negative things.

For example, the phrase "two left feet" applies to those who are clumsy and therefore, incapable of dancing.

Curious to hear more about the challenges facing those with the other dominant hand, Redditor johnnyportillo95 asked:

"What’s something left-handed people have to deal with that right-handed people wouldn’t even think about?"

If only manufacturers appealed to an ambidextrous world.

Furniture Obstacle

"Those desks or couch chairs that have a small desk attached. They do make left handed/sided ones but they are few and far between."

– Prussian__Princess

"And they’re only on one side of the lecture hall, and it’s never a good seat. There is ONE front row, lefty desk in the entire room and it’s in the far corner, obscured by an ancient overhead projector."

– earwighoney

Everyday Objects For Everyday People

"as a left-handed person myself, one thing we often deal with is finding left-handed tools or equipment. many everyday objects, like scissors or can openers, are designed with right-handed people in mind, which can make certain tasks a bit more challenging for us lefties. we also have to adapt to a right-handed world when it comes to writing on whiteboards or using certain computer mice."

– J0rdan_24

Dangerous Tools

"The biggest risk is power tools. I taught myself to use all power tools right handed because of risks using them left handed."

"Trivial, I love dry boards but they are super hard to write on."

– diegojones4

It's hard to play when you're born with a physical disadvantage.

Sports Disadvantage

"Allright, Sports when you are young. Every demonstration from PE teachers are right handed. You cant just copy the movements they teach you you need to flip them and your tiny brain struggoes to process it. As well, 98% of the cheap sports equipment the school uses is right handed."

– AjCheeze

No Future In Softball

"I tried to bat right handed for so long in gym class growing up because the gym teacher never asked me what my dominant side was and the thought never occurred to me as a child to mention it! Needless to say I never became a softball star."

– Leftover-Cheese

Find A Glove That Fits

"In softball and baseball we need a specific glove for our right hand that's often impossible to find unless you own one, and we have to bat on the other side of the plate."

– BowlerSea1569

"I was one of two left-handers in a 4-team Little League in the 1980s. Nobody could pitch to me. I got a lot of "hit by pitch" walks out of it."

– Jef_Wheaton

These examples are understandably annoying.

Shocking Observation

"Having right handed people make comments whenever they see us write, like we’re some kind of alien."

– UsefulIdiot85

"'Woah! You're left-handed????'"

"I find myself noticing when someone is a lefty, and sometimes I comment on it, but I try not to. I'm primarily left-handed (im a right handed wroter but do everything else left), and every single time I go to eat with my family, someone says, "Oh hey, give SilverGladiolus22 the left hand spot, they're left-handed," and inevitably someone says, 'Wait, really?' Lol."

– SilverGladiolus22

Can't Admire The Mug

"We never get to look at the cute graphics on coffee mugs while we’re drinking from them."

– vanetti

"I just realized…I always thought the graphics were made so someone else could read them while you drink. Hmmm."

– Bubbly-Anteater7345

"I'm right-handed and I often wondered why the graphics were turned towards the drinker instead of out for others to see."

– Material-Imagination

The Writing On The Wall

"Writing on whiteboards is a nightmare. I have to float my hand, which tires out my arm quickly, and I can't see what I've already written to keep the line straight."

– darkjedi39

"Also as a teacher, it means I'm standing to the left of where I'm writing, so I'm blocking everything I write. I have to frequently finish writing, then step out of the way so people can see, instead of just being able to stand on the right side the whole time."

– dancingbanana123

Immeasurable

"Rulers."

"How the f'k is no one talking about rulers? It's from 30cm to 0 cm to me, or I have to twist my arms to know the measure I want to trace over it."

– fourangers

Just Can't Win

"EVERYTHING. The world has always been based around people being right handed. As a Chef, my knife skills SUCKED until I worked with a Left Handed Chef. Then it all made sense."

"Literally, everything we do must be observed, then flipped around in our heads, then executed. This is why Lefties die sooner, on average, than Righties."

"I had to learn how to be ambidextrous, just to complete basic tasks (sports, driving a manual, using scissors, etc). I am used to it now, and do many things right handed out of necessity, as wall as parents and teachers 'forcing' it upon me."

"But, at least we are not put to death anymore, simply for using the wrong hand (look it up, it happened)."

"Ole Righty, always keeping us down."

– igenus44

The world doesn't need another demographic to feel "othered" for being different.

But if you're right-handed and tend to make assumptions about left-handed people, you may want to observe the following.

Ronald Yeo, PhD, professor of psychology at the University of Texas-Austin told CNN:

"We shouldn’t assume much about people’s personalities or health just because of the hand they write with."
"And we certainly shouldn’t worry about lefties’ chances of success: After all (as of 2015), five of our last seven U.S. presidents have been either left- or mixed-handed."

Word.

Dog lying down on a bed
Photo by Conner Baker on Unsplash

Not all pet owners have the same relationship with their pets.

While anyone who decides to become a pet owner, or pet parent as some say, love their pets equally, some never ever let them leave their side.

Taking their pet with them to work, running errands, even on vacations.

Many pet parents even allow their pets to share their bed with them when going to sleep.

For others though, this is where a line is finally drawn.

Redditor Piggythelavasurfer was curious to hear whether pet owners allowed their pets to share their bed with them, as well as the reasons why they do/don't, leading them to ask:

"Do you let your pet sleep in your bed? Why/why not?"

The Tiny Issue Of Water...

"Absolutely not."

"I have fish."- Senior-Meal3649

Everyone Gets Lonely Eventually...

"I adopted an eleven year old cat the day before Halloween."

"She has mostly lived in my closet since I got her, and she hasn’t been too interested in coming out."

"Last night, she came out of my closet and jumped up on my bed, and crawled under my covers and curled up by my feet to sleep."

"I was so happy!"- YellowBeastJeep

The Comforting Reminder That You're Not Alone...

"I recently lost my Greyhound but I used to let him sleep on my bed with me."

"The company was nice and he was no trouble to have on my bed."- HoodedMenace3

Hungry Cookie GIF by De Graafschap Dierenartsen Giphy

What Do You Mean Allow?

"I have no choice."

"She is a cat, cats do whatever they want."- Small_cat1412

"He lets me sleep in my bed."- Poorly-Drawn-Beagle

Wouldn't Have It Any Other Way

"I carry my old boy upstairs to bed every night."- worst_in_show

Hug GIF by The BarkPost Giphy

Who Needs An Alarm Clock?

"I let my two cats sleep with me."

"They're so full of love and just want cuddles all the time."

"And so do I."

"We've all developed a lil routine."

"Get to bed, oldest sleeps on my feet to keep them warm, youngest lies in my arm while I lie on my side (she the little spoon), then when I snooze my alarm for work in the morning the youngest paws at my face and meeps loudly to wake me up."- GhostofaFlea_

Whose Bed Is It Anyway?

"Yes."

"They're also kind enough to let me squeeze into whatever space they've left for me."

"Although I do get a few dirty looks off them."- Therealkaylor

"I found this tiny kitten screaming her head off under a car."

"Would not come out."

"Got some food and some water in dishes."

"I stood by the tire so she couldn't see my feet."

"She got curious about the food and water and started gobbling it down."

"I thought she would bolt when I squatted down."

"She was too busy eating."

"I grabbed her by the nape of the neck and all four legs went straight out and she tried to scratch me to death."

"I got her in the door and tossed her toward the couch."

"She ricocheted off the couch as if she was a ping pong off a table and I lost sight of her."

"I put out food and water and a sandbox and did not see that kitten for three days."

"On the third day, I came home and she was on my bed pillow."

"I thought she would bolt when I came near, but she didn't."

"I wanted to sleep so I tried to scoot her little butt off my pillow."

"She would not go."

"I put my head down to sleep and that is the way it was from then on."

"She ran the roost."- Logical_Cherry_7588

sleepy kitten GIF Giphy

Sleeping Is A Prerequisite...

"No, he's a cat and he cannot keep still during the night."

"He walks across the headboard, opens the closet doors, jumps into the windows and rustles the blinds, etc."

"If he would sleep he could stay, but alas, he's a ramblin' man."- Spong_Durnflungle

Saying No Just Isn't An Option...

"'Let'."

"Lol."

"It's a cat's world and I'm happy to be on her good side."- milaren

Felines Only!

"The cat does, the dog doesn't and the horse certainly does not either."- Xcrowzz

Angry Tom And Jerry GIF by Boomerang Official Giphy

Is That My Hair On That Pillow?

"My dog is perfect."

"She comes up, cuddles til we start to fall asleep, then gets down to sleep on her bed so she doesn't get too hot."

"Jumps back up in the early morning for wake up cuddles."

"The hair everywhere is the only downside but she is so cozy, what can you do."- HoodieWinchester

It is easy to understand how some people are able to fall asleep more easily knowing their friend and protector is there, in bed, with them.

Though we can't blame others who don't want to run the risk of being scratched or bitten in the middle of the night either...


Close up of an owl tilting their head to side, looking bewildered
Photo by Josh Mills

The old wives' tales.

They are the stories of legend.

I think we all need a big DEEP Google dive though.

Where did they originate?

WHO ARE THE OLD WIVES!

You don't hear about them as much anymore.

It's like science and logic are suddenly a thing.

But they sure are a good way to keep your kids and their behavior in line.

Redditor the_spring_goddess wanted to discuss the tall tales we've all been fed through life, so they asked:

"What is an old wives tale that people still believe?"

"Wait an hour to swim after eating."

What a crock!

So many summer hours wasted.

I want revenge for that one.

Say Nothing

Giphy

"An undercover cop has to tell you he's a cop if you ask him."

LonelyMail5115

"Pretty much most advice when it comes to cops are old wives tales. I’m not even a cop but most of the advice you hear is pretty off."

I_AM_AN_A**HOLE_AMA

Say Something

"That you have to wait 24 hours to report someone missing."

Severe_Airport1426

"I really think this one is important and should be the top regardless. As it’s a piece of advice that needs to be relearned and the only way to do that is through awareness."

crappycurtains

"This used to be true. I think they changed it after some guy named Brandon went missing back in the '80s or '70s. You used to have to wait 24 hours if the missing person was an adult because they had 'a right to be missing' and then everyone realized that was stupid and stopped doing it."

AlbinoShavedGorilla

Body Temps

"That drinking ice cold water after eating oily foods will solidify the oil and permanently remain in your body. I informed my coworker that if your body temperature ever reached that point, you’d have bigger problems than weight gain."

chriseo22

"Oh, I have a cousin who 100% believed this. One of those guys who believed every early 2000s internet rumor and old wives tale. One night I chugged a big glass of ice water after dinner and he started freaking out and saying my guts were gonna harden."

"I sarcastically told him to drive me to the hospital if that happened. Obviously, nothing happened and the next morning I said something like 'Thanks for being on standby in case my guts filled with hardened oil.' He just walked off muttering under his breath."

apocalypticradish

Arms Down

"When I was pregnant, I was told by young and old alike that I should NOT raise my arms above my head or exert myself in such a manner because it could cause cord strangulation to my unborn sons and daughters."

Fatmouse84

10 Years Actually

Unimpressed Uh Huh GIF by Brooklyn Nine-Nine Giphy

"Chewing gum stays in your stomach for 7 years."

REDDIT

"I remember accidentally swallowing a piece of gum when I was a kid in like 1995 and just accepting my fate like welp, gonna have this in my stomach til high school I guess."

Gecko-911

I was so afraid to sallow my gum when I was young.

This tale is haunting.

High/Low

Hungry Debra Messing GIF by Will & Grace Giphy

"You can tell the sex of the baby by how you carry."

LeastFormal9366

"Pregnancy certainly wins awards for the most old wives tales. So much absolute BS was repeated to us by everyone we talked to."

IllIIIlIllIlIIlIllI

The Cursed

"If you’re a woman and you wear opal jewelry but opal is not your birthstone (October), you’ll never be able to have children, or will be widowed, or just generally have bad luck or something. You can counteract this by having a diamond in the same piece of jewelry as the opal, though."

"I have a nice opal ring that my parents gave me years ago, and I’ve had other women give me this 'advice' unprompted more than once when I’ve worn it. I have absolutely no idea where it started, but I’m pretty sure this little chunk of silicate rock has no concept of what month I was born in, let alone of how my reproductive organs work."

SmoreOfBabylon

Stay In

"Going outside with wet hair will make you get pneumonia. Or an earache. Or maybe arthritis. Depends on which old wife you listen to."

"Jokes on them - I haven't blow-dried my hair in decades and usually leave the house with wet hair in the morning. On winter mornings, the tips of my hair get frozen. No ear infections or pneumonia or arthritis yet."

worldbound0514

Dreams and Facts

"You never make anyone up in your dreams you've seen everyone in your dreams somewhere else before and never make anyone up entirely."

"How would you possibly prove that to be true? My partner adamantly believes this and tells me this 'fact' whenever I have a dream about someone I've never met before."

mattshonestreddit

"My late wife used to tell me that before she met me she would have dreams of standing at an alter on her wedding day but could never see the guy's face, no matter how hard she tried. After meeting me the face was filled in with mine. Don't know if it's true but one of those things I like thinking of every now and then when I miss her."

Darthdemented

Cracked

Getting Ready Episode 2 GIF by The Office Giphy

"Some people still believe cracking knuckles causes arthritis."

Choice-Grapefruit-44

"There's a doctor (Donald Unger) that cracked his knuckles a couple of times a day for 60 years, but only on one hand, just to prove it. Both hands remained exactly the same."

MacyTmcterry

I love my knuckles.

Do you have any tall tales to add to the list? Let us know in the comments below.

lottery tickets
Erik Mclean on Unsplash

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