One consistent sad truth about life is that for just about every person, life is often full of regrets. There are far too many shoulda, coulda, wouldas moments that will haunt many of us until our last breaths. Regret is a hard pill to swallow, but we must never allow it to impede our future. Starting today lets make the goal going forward be that we will make the most of every second and opportunity. And when we feel like we're regressing, we will learn form the past of ourselves and others.
Redditor u/damnthispandemic wanted people to discuss the moments in life they wish they could do over, in hopes the rest of us do better by asking.... What's one thing you deeply regret?The Letdown....
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Was struggling with anxiety and depression, going on auto pilot for a couple months. Wanted to visit with my friend but never had the energy. She died unexpectedly in February. Feel like I let her down. I always try to remind myself of that. Just wish that those days where I was like, "I should pop in on my way home" and then not cuz I was tired.... idk, I think no matter how it worked out I would have felt something wasn't done right. Just part of grief I guess.
be active
Not being an active decision maker in life. Just flowing through time and life like a dead plant.
All the worst case scenarios you've played through in your head aren't nearly as bad as the regret. Plus pretty much none of them play out.
Story of my life too. And then I look at what I've done with my life and I get sad. 31 working a minimum wage job. But at least I have a job.
Love your parents....
Not calling my parents more. I lost both this year and I'd give anything to talk to them one more time. Or hug them both.
I feel this and am sorry. 13 years for me this year and I still miss them every day.
The Cheat...
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Dating my ex.... believing I was his girlfriend while he cheated, for too long.
This was me... crap hurts when you finally realize it and step away.
You will find somebody so much better, and with a name like pizzalover2458 you are probably lots of guys type.
Rest Without Anger
Asked my husband to sleep on the couch that one night. I woke up to find him dead the next morning.
My wife asks me to sleep on the couch every once in awhile when my snoring is out of hand and she has to get up early...
It's not uncommon. I feel the greatest amount of empathy for you, such a simple request between partners that neither of you could have foreseen to have such terrible consequences. I hope you understand that you aren't responsible for what happened.
Jump!
Being too scared to make the leap. Justifying myself back from the edge. Staying safe, where absolutely nothing happens.
I am an amateur musician. Always playing by myself in my bedroom for years. I had a few friends I jammed with but nothing serious at all. Slight performance anxiety kept me from getting out and expressing myself. On a whim I went down to a local amateur jam at a bar, nerves on absolute damn edge.
I was welcomed with open arms, friendly faces with similar lifestyles. Ever since I've been going every other week for a couple years, joined a band that is locally successful, met women, bar owners, pro athletes, hardcore bikers, comedians and all sorts of unique characters. Became a regular and well known. Gave me a purpose that still drives me to this day. Take the leap, man!
Hold On....
When my dad told me he was dying, I was 10. We sat out back and it was the first time he showed emotion. He said "Do you know what cancer is?" To which I responded "Yes" and he began to hug me and cry. As a 10 year old I didn't understand the depth of what he was telling me, now at 34 I deeply regret not hugging him for longer that day.
Forget Him!
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Loving a guy only to find out he had a girlfriend the whole time. I think the regret comes from me letting him screw with my head for much longer than the relationship lasted.
Dude! This happened to my friend! The guy even invited her to his home country to meet his family and as soon as she landed, he told her that they should only act like friends. Her visit lasted a whole two weeks. Two weeks, heartbroken, with a guy and his family and his girlfriend and over a thousand dollars short because she paid for both of their flights. Screw that guy.
Always get Help
Not seeing a psychiatrist sooner. Spent 6 years getting a 4 year degree, and that's with a full course load every semester. Struggled throughout my entire school life. Struggled with talking to people. Thrived online and over text though. The year after graduation, finally sought out help. Turns out I have a learning disability, specifically, auditory processing disorder. Requested reasonable accommodation at work and my production doubled. All I needed was to be able to read what people were telling me.
I've watched more movies in the last 2 years than I have in my whole life, subtitles are a game changer. I'm living in a new world.
If you think movies and shows are impossible to follow, if you walk away from conversations with no idea what was said, if you have bosses constantly repeating directions to you, or if you hate phone calls because they're ineffective, that's not normal! Look into it!!!
Pick up
Not answering my friend's phone call as it was late at night and I had exam the next day. Woke up to the news that she killed herself.
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Finding a Way
Letting my anxiety get in the way of me being happy. Not everyone will like it or use this method. But I am a Christian, and I recently gave my anxiety and life to God I really recommend it, I know not everyone will want to do this, but trust me, it works and it feels amazing.
PUSH HARDER!
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Not trying.
I'm in my mid thirties and only started really giving a crap about myself in the last 5-10 years. Before this I was OK with just drifting.
Now I look back at all the accomplishments I've made over the last few years. I have a good job, people that care about me and some people even look up to me.
Everyday I live my life with pride and a sense that I have more to give but I still have regrets.
I think about what I could have done with my life if I tried harder and pushed myself in my teens or even in my early twenties.
Knowledge Hunt
Not going to school when I should have.
School put such an immense amount of pressure on me to perform well (Was one of the top pupils of the year, so thats why) that I literally broke and became a shell of a human. If I had turned up every day, I honestly would have either had a brutal mental breakdown or killed myself.
Humans vary so much, there is no way anyone can convince me that the schooling route and the way the system works caters to every single person. Theres no way.
I'm Sorry
Being a horrible piece of crap to my old friends. It really screwed me up mentally and emotionally in the end and I'm still dealing with the consequences. If there was one thing I could change in the past, that would be it. I said some unforgivable things and acted like it was their fault.
Nonsense....
Reading that "how do you get over someone?" Thread here from yesterday. I thought I was fine before but that made me spiral pretty hard.
I checked out that thread too, but I just kept seeing the same old "time heals all wounds" nonsense. No. Time does not heal all wounds. There are some wounds that will only heal once you recognize a specific problem, and deal with it.
Some problems require you to go through specific steps and run through a specific path in order to reach a solution
I was still head over heels for my last ex 5 years after we broke up. In 5 whole years, my feelings never diminished. two and a half years were spent with extremely little contact between us, but even then I thought about her every day, and always at my worst.
What finally got me past her was one last conversation. One last time I tried to reach out to her, and she met me with hatred. I realized how broken everything had been, too broken. I realized there was no hope at all. No spark to ignite, no embers to fan. The person I knew and loved was long gone. All that was left was a void, and thats exactly where all of my feelings for her went. No more chest sinking when I think about her, no more heart aches when I hear songs that used to remind me of her. No more pain.
You Gotta Get Friends....
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Not being more social and spending lots of time alone in my room in high school. It's difficult to make friends and break out of your shell later in life, and even your best friends have bigger ambitions than living by you their whole life.
Not sure how old you are, but I think a lot of people become their most social selves in college. In college it's easier to find people with similar interests and quirks as you.
Anyway, I can relate. As I got older and started working, I didn't make an effort to be social after work and on weekends and found myself alone a lot. It's hard!
Toxic Shock
Being the toxic one in the friendship when I was keeping myself convinced I was the victim.
This is literally me! I kept complaining to my other friends saying that I was the victim, I was in a toxic relationship. I kept spreading shit about this friend that I called "toxic". Years later I've realized how toxic I really was :( so I feel ya.
Relax. Breathe.
Constant worrying.
Either I worried about something and it didn't happen, so I was choosing misery over literally nothing... or it did happen and I just found a way through it.
Maybe I dealt with it, maybe it worked itself out, maybe somebody helped me out... but it was never once improved by me worrying in advance.
Release the Baggage....
I only have one regret.
I didn't have time to reconcile with my sister before she passed of cancer. Literally got there a few days late, she was induced into a coma and I watched her fade away over a few days.
She was not a good person growing up: lied, cheat, steal, drug addiction etc... and I carried a lot of issues as I got older but I wish I could have just had a conversation with her before everything went south. She made numerous attempts when she was diagnosed to mend our relationship but I just wouldn't have any of it.
Thats on me and I've carried that baggage for a long time.
Focus on You
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Caring too much about what people think of me.
I feel this one.
3 of Us....
I wasn't a very nice older brother when me and my two younger brothers where younger. I almost killed them a couple of times just over stupid crap. But when you're 12 and a few inches taller then your brother it's too easy to just manhandle them.
We have a great relationship now all three of us call and play games at least once a week but I don't know if it'll ever be enough to undo the harm I've caused them.
If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255).To find help outside the United States, the International Association for Suicide Prevention has resources available at https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
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Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
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See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
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Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
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Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
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The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.