Racism is terrible, there's no room for debate on that. But sometimes terrible things can also be terribly weird.
Today we're going to talk about instances of racism that left the victim confused more than hurt. Because, apparently, some people need to be told that Asian women are allowed to be named Lisa.
One Reddit user asked:
And fam, I cannot handle it. Some of these people legitimately seem like they mean well - which kind of makes things worse, honestly.
A Kobe Fan
Ok I'm a 17 year old half black male and I'm at the counter at McDonald's, taking orders and such and then this old guy comes up to the counter to order. This was a week after Kobe Bryant's death (I'm not exactly a sports person but it's important to the story)
So I do the usual "Hi sir how is your day going?" And what happened next was the most surreal customer experience I've ever had.
He goes BEHIND THE COUNTER and puts his hand on my shoulder and asks "Are ya a Kobe fan?" Not really thinking because this creepy old dude is right behind the counter I respond with a confused "Yes?"
He goes on to say "Oh I could tell by the color of your skin"
I was really uncomfortable and I nudged over for my coworker to save me and she luckily comes to my rescue by saying that I needed to go sweep and that she'd finish the order. That is still my weirdest customer experience to date.
To See How My Dark Skin Would React
I have a few, but the one I was most confused about happened when I was at the mall. I'm a dark-skinned Black woman and I live in Canada. Even though it's a predominantly white country Black people do exist and it's very multicultural and multiracial so this incident can't even be thrown to a "never seen a Black person" territory.
So, I was at the mall with my sister going down the escalator and there was this white woman behind me holding a coffee in her hand. So as we're going down I feel a light touch on my back and I turn around and she just looks at me in shock.
I realize she was trying touch my skin. This is not that uncommon as many people touch me or my hair without my consent which is another story entirely.
I let it go cause I didn't want to assume anything and it could have been an innocent touch. So I turn around. And all of sudden I feel hot coffee on my back.
This women poured her coffee on my back intentionally. At first I thought it was accidental so before she says anything, I started to reassure it's okay, because who would purposely pour coffee on another person.
But she just keeps looking at the place she poured the coffee just repeating "Wow. I've never seen skin that dark. Wow. Wow. Look at how it slides down. So soft. Wow."
And then it clicks she poured it intentionally to see how my dark skin would react to the coffee. This incident still shocks me today and I just remember thinking....did that just happen?
Sing Something Black
I was asked to sing at a graduation event in college. I was asked because I have experience in musical theater and singing in general and they wanted a member of the faculty to do it.
The director of the faculty sent me at least 10 voice messages telling me what he wanted me to sing. It was just different forms of "something black". Like the first two audios he suggested like 10 black artists, then he said I should sing something from [a black city I am NOT from], then he said something about how it should honor my "roots", then he said he wanted me to sing something soulful, then he went back to mention other black cities he assumed my family was from.
The director and I are from the same city and live in the same neighborhood. By the end of it I was so confused. Also this happened last week and I still don't know what I'm gonna sing but I'm really into the idea of rickrolling him.
Sideways Vagina
I was hanging outside a bar with my current boyfriend and a bunch of other people when an homeless woman sauntered up and said to my boyfriend, "Do you like sleeping with that gook with her sideways vagina?"
Everyone went quiet and she just walked away.
The weird bit was that I was the only person there that didn't know that the word was a slur. So I just stood there really lost after hearing some really old-timey racism.
We Just Wanted Dumplings
My friend's story not mine.
She was invited to another friends house for a dumpling party. It's where a bunch of friends get together and everyone brings dumplings. Everybody gets to eat some and take some home with them.
The host had a friend from school come as well and at the end of the night, that friend said, "Thank you for the cultural experience."
She was completely serious. Lady .. we just wanted dumplings. Sometimes woke goes too far. But now we say that jokingly to each other whenever we go get Chinese food.
Turn Out Your Pockets
My friend invited me over his house and his parents allowed me to stay the night. I was a teen at the time and during dinner his dad said if I wanted to sleep over he was cool.
Well the next morning before I left his grandma asked me to pull out my pockets before I left to make sure I didn't steal anything. To date I've never felt more dehumanized.
I know the feeling. I had cops with guns drawn on me, cuff and slam me on the hood of their car, pull everything out of my pockets and threw it on the ground. They put me in the back of the patrol car and asked what gang I was a member of. I told them the biggest gang in the world, the United States Navy.
They looked at my leave papers, apologized and said they thought I was part of an Asian gang and released me.
The Wrong Slur
Went to a bar while back visiting my hometown. Small town in the Midwest. Drunk, angry hillbilly looks at me and says "filthy wetback".
The brazenness took me off guard, so I wasn't even offended. After the situation sank in, I got my friends and we left, because who knows what a racist piece of sh*t and his friends might try to pull if we hang out too long.
Also, I'm Asian, so if he's not even smart enough to call me a ching chong and not a wetback, he's probably more dangerous than a normal racist.
- phd2k1
Lee Sah
I went to college at a diverse school - it wasn't like it was at all unusual to encounter Asians. One fresh September day, we have the first TA-led group session for a course.
I was one of the earlier students to arrive, so I chitchat with the TA. She praises my English in a patronizing way, which is a bit off-putting given that I've lived in this country for the vast majority of my life and speak English more fluently than any other language (and not to brag, but test scores and my eventual career suggest better than your average Canadian). I do not have any accent at all.
Once we're all settled, she goes around asking for names, and writes them out on the board to help her remember. When she gets to me, I say "Lisa".
She writes down... Lee Sah.
I laugh and tell her that it's spelled the usual way.
She responds that she's sorry, but she's not sure what the usual way is.
I finally get though when I say "like the white kind of Lisa."
Kapiolani
I'm white, but have a good story:
A family member was (is?) convinced president Obama was born in Kenya and his birth certificate was fake. The family member's main "evidence" is that the hospital, Kapiolani medical center, sounds like a fake and made-up name.
One minor flaw in this logic: we lived in Hawaii for several years. We've been to Kapiolani Medical Center--it definitely exists.
As someone who grew up in Hawaii (ironically near Kapiolani), you'd be surprised how many people don't really know that its a part of the US. I've applied for jobs here in the mainland and I've had managers ask for my immigration papers or my passport when filling out my w2 forms.
Dreamy And Racist
Brown guy. I was with a girl I was dating. We had a tender moment ruined when, while cuddled in my arms, she said:
"Sometimes you think a race of people is not attractive and that you would never date one, but one comes along who is so incredibly pretty that he changes your entire world."
I sat there for a moment because she meant it as a complement and she was being all day dreamy in my arms while at the same time I realized how grossly racist it was
Kung Fu In Court
Asian American, I was born and raised in the Midwestern USA and English is my first and only fluent language. I got a fix-it ticket for a burnt out headlight a couple years back and before getting it replaced I ended up getting carjacked at gunpoint. The guys ended up totaling the car in a high speed chase with the police.
A couple days later I go to my assigned court date for the aforementioned ticket and explain that I won't be getting my headlight replaced since, ya know, I got f*cking carjacked and had a shotgun stuck in my face.
The clerk to the judge (middle aged white lady) looks at me and with a straight face and says: "What? Don't you know kung fu?"
I don't think she meant to be malicious or racist but it's amazing that people are that daft. It's pretty messed up how open racism towards Asian people is just tolerated since we're 'model minorities' and considered to be timid and subservient.
- direct07
Donuts And Respect
I went to this 24 hour donut/bagel spot. This woman approached me before I began sinking my teeth into a lox sandwich and said: "Just because you're Mexican doesn't mean you don't deserve respect"
That's it. Just said it and dipped. I felt like her intention may have been wholesome, but her execution was poor and came off as her trying to to convince herself that I'm deserving of respect.
Italian
Hoo BOY I have a particular confusing racism story I continually bring up:
I was working when a middle-aged white lady came up to me to ask some things. I answered her, it being my job, and she made a face and asks:
"Hey that's an odd accent you have, where are you from?"
I answered "Mexico"
and she said "Oh... you know you're quite tall and pretty handsome, you could get away with telling people you're Italian so you know..."
At this point she left. I was just frozen and baffled. She said this like it was earnest life-changing wisdom.
- SPicazo
In America We Don't Do That
I'm an American born Asian. Freshman year of HS, this Mormon kid from Utah moved to my school in a wealthy and very diverse East coast suburb. Randomly, the Mormon kid would say something to me in passing as if in response to something I said or did to him earlier in the day. Except I never talked to the guy and had no idea what he was talking to me about.
I would just shrug and ignore his odd confrontations with me.
One day I'm sitting near all our duffle bags stretching between races at a track meet. The Mormon kid comes up to me and starts scolding and lecturing me that: "In America, we don't just go into other people's belongings and borrow stuff without asking. we have to ask permission, and if the answer is yes, then you can borrow something..."
He was literally explaining to me how I should behave since I'm in America now. I just give him an evil eye mixed with disgust and contempt for lecturing me about something I didn't do, as though I'm a newly immigrated 5 year old.
Still, I'm confused as f*ck about him, thinking he must be psychotic.
Ten minutes go by and another kid I barely know comes up and grabs a hat from the Mormon kids bag in front of me. It's an Asian kid, fairly newly immigrant from China. This kid is a good 40 pounds lighter than me. Completely different haircut. No resemblance to me at all other than also being Asian.
He tells me he's been f*cking with this racist Mormon kid since day 1. He's been pulling pranks like, in this instance, repeatedly taking his hat from his duffle bag and giving it to someone else to wear.
Racist Mormon kid thinks it's me pulling pranks on him this whole time, because he can't tell 2 completely different looking Asians apart from each other. I'm Japanese, tall, and have no accent. The prank boy is Chinese short, and has a very Chinese accent. I already mentioned the hair.
All I could do was shake my head Captain Picard Style.
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Short of having a shopping addiction, no one actually likes spending money on stuff.
Why would you ever willingly give it away? It's your money!
Which might be why it feels so bad when you have to spend money of something that should be free from the beginning. People/ corporations are going to chase that cheddar, though, so there's little you can do besides complain, which frankly might be the best thing the internet is for.
Reddit user, woodside37, wanted to know what we should never have to pay for again when they asked:
"What should be free?"
Let's get these out of the way first...No, let's get this first one out of the way first.
Hidden fees are the worst.
Hidden. F***ing. Fees.
"Transaction/processing fees when you order a digital product online. Such as a concert ticket, where you pay 6 euro extra while you pay online, and have to print the ticket yourself."
rickmitchel
"Or processing fees to pay bills that you need. Duke energy charges a $7 processing fee for you to pay your energy bill. Like wtf."
CrispyCrunchyPoptart
Pay To Pee
"Public bathrooms! The amount of human piles of poop around because the homeless have no where to relieve themselves!"
AuntyMarcy
"Live in a very tourist-y part of the U.K., all public toilets charge and most cafes/pubs/libraries won’t let people use their toilets. As someone who lives here year round it’s really frustrating and doesn’t seem to make sense."
JonesNewport83
Want A Better Society? Educate Them.
"College. Or at the very least, college APPLICATIONS. If you're gonna require it for most careers, atleast make it accessible for people. And I just think it's stupid that people have to pay to get rejected."
callmeventibcimavent
"Oh god I hate that so much. Same with applying to apartments it’s such a waste of money if you don’t get approved. It racks up quickly too."
Kydra96
It does feel grimy when "official documentation" that is "mandatory" has to be bought and paid for not by the people requiring it, but by the people needing it.
Forcing Us To Pay For Something We're Forced To Have
"ID cards issued by the government. Especially since you need them for almost every aspect of daily living."
waqasnaseem07
"I. Exist."
"Birth certificates"
alexchico3
"I'm not the biggest fan of free stuf but having to pay for a piece of paper that says "I exist" is ridiculous."
Spaghetti-Evan1991
It'll never not feel bad having to pay for something we expect to be free, but it feels ten times worse when it's something you need to get by in life. As in, need to live.
Let's All Agree To Take Care Of Each Other
"All base needs up to a level. I mean stuff we need to survive, eg. power, water,... and things we are required to use to be relevant in daily life internet,..."
"Seeing how now power companies are fuel companies are having THE biggest profit in years while more and more families are pushed into bigger and bigger deths just to get by."
"Same goes for internet tbh, poor kids are just not getting by in school becasue they lack the basic stuff every other kid has to get further in life. I am not saying they need the fastest possible internet with unlimited dl, but give them so they can work for school so the vicious cycle can be broken."
Amelsander
We Need It More Than Anyone
"All mental health services. If you don’t have benefits or a VERY good paying job, they are unaffordable for how often most people really need them. At $120-160/ session even once a week is not affordable for most people these days"
pennylayne77
A Fine Line Between Need And Want
"Water"
selfishnerd77
"Drinking water, sure. But water is an expendable resource and it should honestly be more restricted when we think about cases like people watering their lawns."
I_Am_Become_Dream
Paying To Live
"Insulin. People are dying because of greedy pharmaceutical companies."
Astronimus123
"But We're 'Pro-Life'" - Jerks
"Birth control of all kinds."
"For anyone who b*tches about spending taxpayer money, I'd ask whether it costs more to provide condoms or to house prisoners."
AlexReynard
"Giving birth (In the us)"
z0k0n
"As a female US citizen the more I learn about the whole giving birth sh*t the less I want kids. My friend just had a baby, there were some complications. She is now paying off a 14k hospital bill! The lowest I have hears is 8k. 8k just to have a f-cking kid! For a country that is gung-ho about forcing women to have kids they have missed the mark completely."
Main-Yogurtcloset-82
Everyone is looking for their payout, and unfortunately sometimes we're the ones who have to give it to them, whether it makes sense or not.
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The worst part of having breasts is Florida.
I didn't even say large breasts. Just breasts, any breasts. Florida and breasts are mortal enemies sworn to battle one another into oblivion until the end of days.
In other states, you and your ladies can live a more peaceful life. Here in Florida, it's A Song of Sweat And Fire Ants.
Ever get tiny little jellyfish stuck under your side-boob? Happens here all the time.
Bikinis should come with a "Sand Lice, Your Titty Crease, And You" informational pamphlet.
Wanna jog? Hope you accounted for the fact that the air is soup and will chafe and cauterize your nipples.
Know what limits your field of vision, making you more likely to accidentally step on a snake and/or gator? Boobs.
Know what slows you down as you try to escape the angry reptile from the above paragraph? Also boobs.
Reddit user Saibotnl1 asked:
"What's the most negative thing about having boobs?"
Now take all this stuff they said sucked, and then put it inside of a steam oven filled with mosquitos. That's Florida.
And Florida is incompatibile with breasts.
Cardio Is Hardio
"I love them but running can be a nuisance even in a good sports bra."
- [Reddit]
"When I go to work, there is a woman that usually runs on the shoulder of the road. I gasp at how much her boobs bounce. Isn't that doing damage to tissue? Painful?"
- notanotherbreach
"Yes! I literally always hold mine when going up/down stairs so they dont bounce. Running is uncomfortable even with a good bra :/ "
- k_g94
"If it's a sports bra that holds you, it's so tight that it's impossible to get into or out of without a whole team of people like a pit crew."
"If you can comfortably get into it, it won't hold the girls for long."
"Cardio is just not worth all this."
-[Reddit]
"As a kid I wasn't fit enough for jump rope, but now that I'm older and have the big boobies it feels even more impossible to ever indulge in."
- PoiLethe
Literally In The Way
"They get in the way!!"
"Lately I've been getting frustrated with exercise. My personal trainer will say to hold something a certain way and I'll try but it's so uncomfortable because my boobs are completely in the way."
"She has small boobs so she doesn't account for them being in that space right in front of your chest."
- J09Lynn
"My English teacher in 10th grade was drinking water one day when a few drops landed on his shirt. He then complained about getting older and how he never stuck out far enough to get his shirt wet."
"I just sighed."
"4th grade. 4th grade is when I stuck out too much to avoid drips."
- wheredMyArmourGo
"So very much this."
"I refuse to do mountain climbers when my trainer suggests it, she started to get mad saying it's a great exercise. My retort was that I'd really rather not knee myself in the breasts as part of my workout."
"The lady has small boobs and replied that she had never thought of that!"
- Pauliester
Growing Pains
"Probably growing them."
"It hurts, and if you get big boobs young and quickly, it’s both physical and social agony."
"It hurts to grow them, first of all, your chest aches and bumping them against anything really hurts - and since they’re a sudden, large addition to your body, you’re ALWAYS bumping them on stuff."
"But the social aspect is worse."
"Your female family members comment on them slyly and smirk at your response."
"Your male friends look at you weird and you have to realize they see you as more sexual than girls with smaller chests, even though you literally cannot control this."
"Other girls can be nasty and jealous."
"Eventually I learned to manage all this and I like having breasts now; but from like 11-16 I was so frustrated and upset that I had developed them at all."
- Individual_Ad_7523
Two Volcanos
"The sweat and itch!"
"Also that they're like two volcanos, which isn't especially practical during summers or when you're a constantly hot temperatured person anyway."
- Queen-of-meme
"No matter what I try, the skin under my boobs never cools down!"
- Local_Masterpiece_
"Boob sweat is the bane of my existence when it's even a little bit hot outside - and sometimes even when it's not lol..."
- PleasuredMeatStick
"I hate the feeling of sweat on my boobs. I just put tissue between and underneath my boobs to hopefully absorb the sweat so it won’t start to itch and drip."
- LuckyBugHarley
Technological Advancements
"I STILL am not able to remove them after a long day. Why?!"
"Why can't I just set em aside for the night, all done. Why hasn't technology advanced to this possibility yet??"
- IAmNotLookingatYou
"Absolutely they would. The relief we would get ... oh my god it sounds divine."
"Maybe I wouldn’t be so b*tchy."
- Object_Prize
"I’d honestly probably only wear them for ren faire, and leave them at home the rest of the year."
- AbbyNormalKnits
Double Trouble
"The double standard of girls with small chests and big chests."
"If you have a big chest no matter what you wear or do it's sexual. But for girls with smaller chests they can get away with crop tops or v necks or even swim suits."
- BigBunsLittleBunbun
"Lol the bigger girls who spent their entire grade school years getting sent to the principal's office for breaking dress code will agree with you."
"Loose shirts will tent and billow up in the wind as you walk-- dress coded."
"Tight shirts that don't tent but cling to your chest-- dress coded."
"And don't even think about anything but a crew neckline, or you'll be dress coded again."
- cryptic-coyote
"Exactly!"
"I always got in trouble for wearing dresses in school, but skinny Minnie wearing something even worse gets by no problem just because she doesn't fill it out the way I do."
- APD2269
Expensive
"They're expensive."
"Bras are expensive and you need regular bras, sports bras, probably something special like a strapless or low back if you have a special occasion or something."
"And don't even get me started on women's healthcare ..."
- SailorSpoon11
"Stage 4 breast cancer patient here, and it costs me about an extra $5000/yr to stay alive if everything goes well."
- insertcaffeine
"I just stopped breastfeeding and none of my bras fit anymore."
"I’ve just been wearing sports bras every day because I don’t even know what cup size I am anymore and I don’t want to spend a fortune replacing all of my bras."
- kaytay3000
"Plus if you choose not to wear bras for any number of reasons, you’re treated as deviant or an acceptable target of inappropriate attentions."
- letsjumpintheocean
Getting Comfortable
"Laying on your stomach can be tricky."
- ChadweenaThundervag
"Laying on your back can be tricky as well."
"And on your side."
"Just laying in general with big boobs is a hassle."
- Skkaj225
"Am guy."
"However women in my life have found it difficult to get a decent back massage because of this. I've seen plenty of massage tables with head holes, but none with boob support..."
- DeluxeWafer
"Semi-suffocating yourself on the beach while trying to get some sun on your back is fun."
- Miikami
Either Or
"The fact that I look like a walking refrigerator if I wear a loose fitting top, as it billows shapelessly around my body in an odd fabric rectangle."
"But if I wear something form fitting, I look like a lady of the night and am treated as such."
- batchofbetterbutter
"OMG this !!"
"I feel like all my girlfriends around me have such a fashion sense and can wear things with such grace but I always look as you’ve described. Like either I look like a couch pillow or Jessica Rabbit."
"Sometimes I just want to cut them off honestly."
- octokisu
"Yeah I’ve been wanting a reduction since a was a teen because of the back pain and catcalling, and many people I know with a bigger chest feel the same way."
- didithedragon
"I had no idea women hated their boobs so much! It honestly is shining a light on an idea I have never thought of."
- Peter_the_pear
Attempted Murder
"They might try to kill me."
"Breast cancer runs in my family and I have to have my first mammogram this year at 36."
"My mom was negative for both BRCA genes but there are 6 others they’ve discovered since she had cancer that we haven’t been tested for."
"Insurance won’t cover me to test unless she tests positive for one."
- Outrageous-Proof4630
"Fun fun fun."
"My mom died from breast cancer at 46. I started getting mammograms at 34."
"Luckily, I took the BRCA test and was negative."
- lil_ho_on_da_prairie
It's Constant
"Constantly being sexualized."
"I’m the least sexual person but people assume I’m super sexual because of my body. And I hate it"
- Plus_Bison_7091
"Yup, I'm ace and I honestly just want them chopped off to be rid of the constant sexualization of my body."
"It makes me really uncomfortable."
- zapsquad
"My friend in elementary school had a condition where she went into puberty super early and had large breasts by 3rd grade."
"We would walk together to elementary school every morning and get cat called a lot, but we were too afraid to tell our parents because we thought they wouldn't let us walk together anymore."
"She would have teachers make comments about them."
"When we were older she talked about how insanely awful and alienating it made her feel growing up. Her younger sister had the same condition, but went on puberty blockers for it."
- gentlybeepingheart
Destroyed
"These pendulous bags of hell have destroyed my back."
"Even a decade after a reduction surgery, I remain in daily pain. And now as an added bonus they get to be misshapen, scarred horribly, and completely useless for raising a baby."
- Originalluff
"I didn’t realize how heavy they are until I got together with girl with big boobs and woooooow they are heavy!"
- I_love_pillows
"I got C cups in fifth grade and those f*ckers went all the way to G by senior year."
"My posture was/is awful and I've felt like an old woman since I was a teenager. I don't even want babies, so they're never actually gonna be useful either."
- Rozeline
See what I mean?
They're kind of awful once they hit a certain size, and that size is pretty much ANY size if you're in Florida.
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There are humane ways to tell someone to go home after a... liaison.
How can one be so rude after being so intimate?
I'm not saying you have to snuggle and profess love, but damn, a quick... "thanks, I hope life is kind to you" goes a long way.
Redditor sumyungdood wanted to hear the tea about the times they had to tell a lover to take a hike. They asked:
"What is the worst way someones asked you to leave after sex?"
Tell me your worst. Mine our stories where I had find my clothes in the dark and sneak out naked.
Don't ask...
A Late Run
"Asked if he could drive my car to the gas station to buy cigarettes and when he came back he told me he left my keys in the car and it was running."
TopOcelot13
Beefed
"An old friend invited me over for her famous beef stew. I got there, we fool around, had sex, then right after she handed me a tupperware of the stew and said 'you got sex and stew, now please leave.' Still not sure if that's the worst way I was kicked out or the best."
TheRockMan31
"Most of the people here didn’t get stew. You did okay!"
livesarah
'is it that obvious'
"Went home with a girl from the bar. After we had sex, she said something like 'soooo... think you can get an Uber now? If not, I GUESS you can sleep on the couch for a few hours.' Here I was, sitting on some random girl's couch trying to find an Uber at 4 AM. Mercifully I did find one and when the guy picked me up he said 'so, your hookup kick you out?' I said 'is it that obvious' and he replied 'you weren't the first one I drove back to their car tonight and you probably won't be the last.'"
apocalypticradish
Yummy
"Go grab some Taco Bell. You can eat it on your way home. Honestly it was better than the sex. And I don't even like Taco Bell that much."
Nobody_Wins_13
I hate Taco Bell. And since reading this... I hate people.
Mrs. Robinson?
"She lit a cigarette, then looked at me for like 20 seconds, and said 'Well, bye.' I just got dressed and left. Never saw her again."
Rhalellan
And you are?
"While dozing off, he gently tapped my shoulder, and said: 'Maribel, you can’t stay here.'"
"My name is not Maribel."
tikkichik21
"See this is what happens when you don’t let people talk about Bruno."
Brendanlendan
Go
"He got off me and started looking at pictures of other women on Instagram, and commenting on how much more attractive they were than me and told me 'oh yeah you can go now.' We were best friends for like two years up until that moment."
Caramel_Cappucino
"I’m open minded but this is exactly why I often don’t trust male friendships. You could even be a lesbian and one moment of vulnerability they may take advantage of that. I know it’s unrelated but your experience made me upset and I’m sorry you had to go through that."
L8NiGHTFLiGHT
second time...
"He rolled over, grabbed his phone, and without even looking at me said 'find your clothes, you know where the door is' and just laid there on his phone ignoring me while I gathered my clothes and left. He tried texting me a few days later because he was drunk and horny so I told him 'you know where your hand is' and blocked him."
olivinemultichrome
Gross
"We were good friends for a few years before hooking up after a night of drinking."
"Halfway through sex he told me he can't actually do this because he wanted to get back with his ex and can't mess it up because she's the hottest girl he'll ever be with. He lived in the middle of nowhere and I couldn't leave until the morning so he made me sleep on the couch."
barontayto
Wow. Some people are truly disgusting. How do you treat other humans this way?
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Most couples are inseparable and enjoy doing everything together, thanks in part to shared mutual interests.
But on occasion, some people in relationships go off in pursuit of one-sided pleasures in secret for various reasons.
These can range from going out to a vegan restaurant when the other person is a carnivore to seeing a Netflix show that is too violent for a squeamish significant other.
Because not every significant other may not share the same passion, Redditors TheTinRam asked:
"What’s a guilty pleasure you hide from your significant other?"

These Redditors needed some "me time."
Dad Time
"Everytime I go on a late night grocery run (once or twice a month) because I work nights, and my wife forgot to grab whatever, I add a $0.70 Mexican soda to the cart. It is just for me. It is something my dad used to get me on especially long days when I was a kid 'helping' him on jobsites. It is my tiny reminder of him."
– thecountnotthesaint
Story For No One
"I write stories for years now, some of the times she thinks I'm working on the computer but I'm actually writing a story. There is nothing to hide but I just keep it to myself, none of my family members know I write stories. Till today I have written 56 stories (most of them are short)."
– SuvenPan
In The Wee Small Hours Of The Morning
"Staying up late for peace and quiet."
– Blue_OG_46
Chatting For One
"I talk to myself all the time, I was actually wondering last night if it was a really weird thing to do lol"
– hottytoddy_sko
Naked And Sacred
"I will cruise the house butt naked and just do whatever the hell I want. About once a month. I won’t be able to this summer because the kids will be back in school, but come August, I’ll be naked and free again!"
– batchofbetterbutter
Some people need to get out of the house.
Self Therapy
"Sometimes I take the long way home and talk to myself in the car about my 'problems' - like Self Therapy. I put one earbud in so ppl think I could be on the phone."
"I get quite animated. It helps to get a stressful day out of my system before I get home and switch gears."
– Humble-Plankton2217
Solo Slice
"My husband has gluten sensitivity. If he eats regular pizza, his stomach hurts for a couple of days after."
"Well, I don't, so sometimes I say I'm going for a run, and I do run.... to the pizza store, eat a slice, and run back."
– sohumsahm
Catching Up With The Boys
"Covid has messed it up for a bit now. But every 3 or so months the boys and I all get up like we are going to work at our respective jobs but instead all call in sick and meet for breakfast, then go back to our one buddies place for the day to hangout. Around 4 or 5 one by one we all head home for our normal arrival time."
"It's literally the only way for us all to get together reliably. Most of us have known each other for the better part of 30 years now, going way back to junior kindergarten for some."
"Twice I have let her know my plan for the day and twice I have gotten phone calls to come home early for what ever not some emergency. So now we do it secretly."
– foh242
Some of the things people do behind their SO's backs is for endearing reasons.
Smooch Ploy
"I don’t know if this is a guilty pleasure necessarily but I pretend to be asleep when he comes home from work because he always kisses me on the forehead."
– str8outofabook
Catching Zzzs
"I love when she snores."
"She complains (only lightly) about my snoring all the time, and I always feel awful that I make it tricky for her to get a good night's sleep. When she's snoring, I know she's actually going to rest well, and it makes me happy."
– ricdesi
Scent Of A Man
"Smelling his clothes. Not creepily, like his boxers. But when he lets me borrow a shirt or a sweater I’ll put it on and just revel in the smell of him on his clothes. If I recall correctly, it definitely wasn’t like this when we first started dating. It’s been over two years now and I only remember doing this around the 7 month mark. He smells really, really good."
– he-whoeatsbugs
The Forever Admirer
"I have a whole album of 'unflattering' pictures of her. Not really something I hide, but they make me happy. She’s so silly yet so beautiful."
– Dewahll
They say that a couple that plays together, stays together.
That's all well and good. However, a significant other having some alone time should never be stigmatized.
My husband and I usually watch every TV show together, but I watch Netflix's Ozark by myself because I enjoy intense dramas, immensely.
It's not a secret. And he's glad I watch the shows that I want to watch on my own time–just like I encourage him to watch all those UFO documentaries that he's obsessed with, by himself.
No really, watch them without me.
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