People Confess How They Really Feel About Monogamy
Photo by Everton Vila on Unsplash

Monogamy. Is it natural?

We're in a place now where when it comes to sex, everyone is freer.

It's all confusing.

So we must start questioning.

What are everyone's thoughts on one partner?

Redditor Raoulchloe wanted to discuss sex with others when you're committed.

So they asked:

"What do you think about monogamy?"

Sex with only one person. Forever. I'm hoping I can pull it off.

The One

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"Monogamy is great. Plus it was enough work to get one person to like me."


For Me

"It is for me."


"Me too. 23 yrs and counting. Still have fantastic sex. Love my wife. All good in the hood."


"Dude it really is. I’m 40, and the best I’ve learned is the more you make her the priority in bed the more she will come out of the closet."


Time Issues

"I honestly don't understand how people have time to be poly. Between work, chores, friends, family, social obligations, and time with my partner I literally don't know where I'd fit in a whole other relationship."


"Seriously, I love my SO but those few moments I get that i'm truly by myself i cherish very deeply. Adding a whole other person with needs and wants to that mix? Jesus."


Being a wife...

"I've been with my wife for 14 years. That's my context here before I start. I don't think I could do a proper poly relationship. Being one of several people in a relationship with my wife, even if the primary, would require me to be a super balanced secure person, and chief that ain't me no matter how much I want to be."

"So I don't think polygamous relationships are bad, I just think I would not be good at them."

"I guess I'm saying that monogamy may not be my ideal, but I am sure as sh*t not cut out for anything else, not even some bullshit fantasy where I am the king and have all these lovely women who only have eyes for me and I get to sleep with all of them, because even my one wife reckons I could be better at being a husband most of the time so I reckon I'd be s**t at being a husband to more than one."



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"It’s worked for the 30 years of our marriage. It’s not for everyone."


Monogamy... it can be for everybody.

Too Much

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"I'd rather be monogamous than anything else. Getting my wife to like me was frigging hard enough. We've got 2 kids, I've got enough people in my life to add another partner into that mix."



"I am on board. Been with my wife for 16 years and married for 12, I prefer it to being single or trying to maintain multiple relationships (I do not have the time or energy for that even if it sounded fun). However, I never understood people who stay in unhappy marriages. If you are both not happy, unless there is some massive hidden benefit, leave and try to find happiness for yourself and the other person!"


Simply the Best

"I think it's boring, in the best way possible. I think it's safe, with the right person."

"Honestly, I think it's ideal for me."

"No shame if it's not for you, but personally, I feel that presently it's what would make me happiest in a relationship."



"I spent a large portion of my life prior to ten years ago identifying as poly. I'll tell you, I had lots of experiences I value, but safety and security were not among them."

"Ten-eleven years ago, I met my current mate and she laid it on the line early on that poly wouldn't work for her. I thought she was so awesome I agreed to be monogamous. Best decision I ever made."


The Rates

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"A lot of people think it's unattainable with the cheating rate and all. Personally, I'd have a panic attack if I had to deal with double this attention from another man, I'm already tired."


Monogamy... it's not for everybody. But good luck to all.