History isn't a story you can write, it is a story that completely wrote itself.
And just like the Real Housewives, history is wild. There is no predictability. It just... is.
And just like the Real Housewives, the plot twists come when you least expect it.
u/tanvirk321 asked:
What was the biggest plot twist in real history?
Here were some of the answers.
The Fate Of 20th Century USA
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Theodore Roosevelt.
He was made vice president to reduce his profile, take away his power and get rid of him. Then William McKinley dies, and a man who probably couldn't have been elected president, with radical political views very different from most of hls party becomes president and shakes things up more than anyone in 2 generations.
Impostor Syndrome
Probably the time during WW1 the Germans disguised one of their ships, SMS Cap Trafalgar, as the British liner HMS Carmania, and by sheer coincidence and bad luck the first ship they came across was the real HMS Carmania, which ended up sinking them.
Moving Backwards
The 1944 Democrat vice-president nominations. Henry Wallace (very popular at the time) was replaced by Harry Truman as Roosevelt's vice-president due to efforts by party leaders because they believed that Wallace was a little too far to the left and didn't want him running once Roosevelt stopped.
Kween Of Scots
Every single thing about Mary Queen of Scots.
She was born and plot twist, her dad died and made her queen. She goes to France and marries. Plot twist, the king dies and leaves her husband as king of France. Plot twist, he dies right after.
Enjoy some drama and end with her getting captured. Plot twist, she escapes and flees the country to her cousin for help. Elizabeth jails her until killing her. Plot twist, turns out she was really coming to overthrow Elizabeth, not just seek refuge.
When Suspicion Goes Wrong
Richard Jewell. He was at the 1996 Summer Olympics in Atlanta, working as a security guard. There he spotted a suspicious backpack which had 3 pipe bombs inside. He alerted the police, and helped evacuate people from the area. 2 people died, one woman was directly injured by shrapnel and a Turkish cameraman had a heart attack. But he saved around 100 people in getting them evacuated.
Things took a turn when he was considered a suspect. The FBI had him as a potential suspect and this, of course, leaked to the media. Suddenly the media turned on Jewell. They began hounding him, suggesting that he was guilty of the crime and staged it all to make himself look like a hero.
In the meantime, more bombings occurred.
Eventually it was discovered that the bomber was Eric Rudolph, who committed more bombings in the 90s. He admitted to it publicly, and Jewell's name was cleared.
Up until his death, he still, anonymously, placed a rose at the Olympic Park memorial where Alice Hawthorne died.
Stop Promoting Him
Vice-admiral William Bligh, when he was a lieutenant his crew mutinied and cast him adrift after leaving Tahiti and Bligh started making excessively worsening punishments for lacking the discipline the crew had before arriving at Tahiti and being allowed to slack off.
Not at the twist yet. 17 years later he became governor of New South Wales (at the time that's all Australia was, no other states existed yet) to try and stop rising rum trade. Learning nothing from the mutiny, he was an jerk to everyone he could and the local military rebelled and arrested him, which the British declared a mutiny. He was mutinied TWICE for the same reason, and still got promoted to rear admiral and later vice-admiral!
Мы везде
Kim Philby, one of the most senior members of the British intelligence service, MI6, turns out to be a Soviet spy.
20 years later, Oleg Gordievsky, a high-ranking colonel in the KGB and former Rezident of their London office turns out to be a British spy.
The revelation of most spies is basically a plot twist in history.
By Accident
The assassination of Archduke Ferdinand.
The group messed up the attempt, the grenade they threw didn't go off as expected and blew up the car behind the target. The assassin panicked after the failed attempt, wallowed a cyanide pill, and jumped in a nearby river. Except the cyanide pill just made him vomit, and the river was only 6 inches deep... so he was caught pretty easily
Following the failed attempt, another member of the group went to get some food at a local restaurant. Around the same time, Archduke Ferdinand told his driver to head to the hospital where he and his wife could visit those injured from the failed plot earlier. The driver got lost and tried to reverse the car; it stalled right in front of the restaurant where the assassin was finishing lunch. He walked outside, saw the Archduke standing there, and fired into his neck.
Essentially, (one of) the most revolutionary events of the 20th century was a do-over.
It Just Got Weird
I'm no Revolutionary War buff, but I distinctly remember my history professor teaching us about a time where England should've undoubtedly won the war, but it rained that day and the English general (Gentle Johnny) decided to postpone. My understanding is there were a few key moments where the colonies sidestepped crushing defeat by pure luck.
Saved By A Reputation
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Prussia not losing in the Seven Years' War.
It was France, Austria, Russia and Sweden surrounding Prussia on all sides. Frederick the Great of Prussia was an amazing commander who scored legendary victories but that still wouldn't be enough to win against such overwhelming odds.
Then the Empress of Russia died and the new Tsar was basically a fanboy of Frederick so he just pulled out of the war and had Sweden do the same (while their side was winning).
This allowed Prussia to hang on against Austria and France and this stalemate on the continent which was a resource drain allowed Britain (Prussia's ally) to dominate overseas, which eventually turned into a world hegemony empire. All because of ultimately not military might but admiration.
Of course, most of the time, it was “just a phase". And looking back, those phases are regrettable, to say the least. Here are some prime examples of that.
SirGergoyFriendman asked:
What was your biggest/most regrettable "It's not a phase, mom. It's my life." that, in fact, turned out to be just a phase and not your life?
The enthusiasm of a young person can lead to some unexpected changes that parents are just not ready for.
Hi, Wheeljack!
I was VERY into The Transformers when I was a wee lad in the 1980s. One day, I decided to change my name to the name of my favorite Autobot. My name was lame, and I wanted an awesome Transformer name. And I was VERY insistent that my parents only call me by my new name. Calling me by my 'old' name would cause a big fat tantrum on my part.
So for the better part of a week, my poor parents had to call me Wheeljack.
Very 2008.
Ariana Grande Shrug GIFGiphyMy cat-ear phase. I wore cat ears every single day. Everywhere. I had like 20 pairs of them. Now everyone thinks I'm a furry.
I find that very cute and wouldn't have thought you'd be furry. Even if you'd had cat mittens. I think my suspicions would have started if you moved a bit like a cat, displayed catlike grooming habits or got a cat mask.
Not gonna lie, that car sounds cool.
I went to a car show once as a teen, and the only newer car there was some chick's PT cruiser. It was hot glittery pink, and at the time I was obsessed. I insisted that one day I would have a hot pink car, with pink seats, pink dash, pink carpets, etc. I was pretty heavily goth at the time, so my parents just rolled their eyes.
These phases can often lead to some very strange fashion choices.
That’s commitment.
When I was a teenager (early 00s), I was waiting for my mother to pick me up and was wearing one of those sh!tty sports wristwatches. It was itching me so I took it off for a second, but then she arrived and because I was struggling to get it back on my wrist, I looped it around the equally sh!tty chain I had around my neck in a rush to get out the door.
My mom asked me about it in the car, and I told her this was my new style and I planned to wear it like that every day. She rolled her eyes.
I wore that watch on a chain around my neck every single day for 3 years or so. There are even professional family photos where I'm wearing it because I refused to take it off.
One day, the chain broke and I lost the watch. I was in high school at that point anyway and it was a major lady repellent, so... phase over.
Not everyone can be Eminem.
slim shady eminem GIFGiphyBaggy pants, being a rapper someday and being a professional skater.
When I was about 14 and Eminem was starting to blow up I bought myself a keyboard with a synthesizer. It cost like $200 which was all the money I had saved up. It finally came (this was way before amazon prime and such) and I tried rapping.
My sister told me "you're effing horrible" and I gave up right then and there.
This should be a sin.
I used to button the top buttons of polo shirts.
I must say, this is probably the worst one I've read.
Looking back at our regrettable choices, all we can do is cringe.
An optimistic look at bad tattoos.
check me out season 3 GIF by PortlandiaGiphyBeing a tattooer. Regrettable because of those poor people who have my awful doodles on their bodies.
Take heart! My favorite tattoo is the one I drunkenly got my buddy to do in his living room one year during March Madness! It's dumb and frankly mediocre? But such a good story and has such good associations I smile every time I see it.
RIP Fredro’s.
My friend and I decided we were going to open a bar in Jamaica with exotic snakes in glass cages in the walls at each booth. We convinced ourselves it would be amazing for at least two years in college. It was going to be called Fredro's.
My entire family made fun of me for it. Once we got out of college, we realized it was not feasible and joined the office grind. We're also two white guys with no ties to Jamaica.
Talk about cringey.
I wore a top hat with an anime pin on it for around a year. Met one of my current best friends while wearing it, idk how he could bear to speak to me after that.
My weirdest phase was probably when I insisted on wearing knee-high rainbow socks to school every day. But honestly, I don't regret it. I rocked those socks, and I wish I still have a pair.
To all the people out there cringing over their past selves, remember that you were just a kid, and to be easy on yourselves. After all, we've all been there
Yet, too often, manufacturers who oversell their products fail to deliver what is promised and are inevitably left with angry customers who want their money back.
Whether the merchandise was defective or ridiculously overpriced, strangers online shared some of their worst purchases when Redditor BooksMcGee asked:
"What is the worst product you ever paid money for?"
Short Life Span
"This NERF gun that's supposed to shoot tennis balls for your dog. I bought it cause I thought you could load 3 at a time and shoot them far, but it's just one and it's super loud and the gun broke after like 4 shots (reading reviews later, this was a common issue)."
Lame Pets
"There were these toys called squiggles when I was a kid and the commercials made it seem like the toy was alive. It looked like you would get this crazy little fuzzy worms as pets that would follow you around an so sick tricks and listen to your every command. It was really just a piece of fluffy string tied to another piece of string with googly eyes on it. People may say that it was supposed to be a magic trick but they should also explain that to a 5 year old who really wanted a pet."
Card Value
"Not their fault, but I paid $70 for a Yugioh card hours before it was limited to one copy. Probably dropped to $20 by the end of the day."
These purchases were bad for your bum.
"A bicycle that literally fell apart before I made it out of the parking lot."
Not Worth Sitting On
"Joybird brand couch. Was so terrible, we returned it. Still hard to believe, we returned a freaking couch."
Going Nowhere Fast
"A 2000 VW Beetle (used)."
"Biggest piece of sh*t that literally had to have just about everything replaced before 100k miles and would still break down every time you left the driveway to the point where the tow-truck driver knew us on a first-name basis."
Expensive Lemon
"An Oldsmobile Achieva from one of those buy here pay here places. I should have known better, but I was young and thought I was getting a good deal. I had the thing for about 5 months, I drove it for maybe 3 weeks. The rest of the time it was either in the shop, or in my driveway waiting until pay day so I could afford to fix whatever broke on it this week. Eventually told the dealer just take it, I'm not paying for it any more. He said nope, and I will make sure your credit is ruined. I said well you sold me a lemon, do you really want to go this route? He came and took it. Never reported anything to credit. I heard he got sued by several other people who sold sh**ty cars too and eventually went out of business."
"Always amazes me when I see them driving around still, I can only assume there's enthusiasts who just love repairing horribly designed cars."
– zerbey
These Redditors were not convinced what they ingested was edible.
Bad Cereal
"A box of plain Cheerios. Thought they were honey nut, poured a bowl, was very disappointed."
"If I wanted to taste cardboard, I'd just eat the box."
– gor8884
Space Pizza
"A burnt frozen pizza at the air and space museum cafe in DC. I Don't wish that experience on anyone. There are some amazing restaurants in DC, don't settle."
– Alseids
The following electronics just gave off a bad charge.
"Asus Transformer Pad TF700"
"This was one of those early 'high end' Android tablets that was grossly underpowered, and it showed. Thing was slow as sh!t in no time flat. Rookie mistake investing into shiny new tech while they were still working all the bugs out. Think I paid somewhere in the neighborhood of $350-400 for it..."
– Luke5119
Bad Apple
"macbook pro 2018 13" touchbar. 2 years old and dead (battery). they're asking $300-$400 to change the battery. malfunctioning keyboard with double presses and missing presses. that's a lot of money for bad design."
Chilly Reception
"Past winter my old room heater broke down and I had to buy a new one. Went to a store nearby and somehow got convinced to buy a very costly heating device.. It's also my fault, since there were some sligthly cheaper options around, but nope. I wanted the expensive one thinking it will make my small room a volcano with little to no effort/cost (that's also what the seller told me). Long story short the device wasn't doing ANYTHING. No significant temperature changes, too much space, a weird noise, and was doubling my previous device in utility cost. I still gloom over those 80 euros.."
Some of my disappointing purchases was clothing, but only because I purchased them online. Unless they are a brand I'm familiar with, I'm usually fine with buying new jeans off of their websites.
But when it comes to graphic tees only available on specialty shops, an M-size shirt is not necessarily the same size as those found in other reputable stores.
I bought a medium sized T-shirt from a boutique store online because I loved the look of the design. But when it arrived, the supposed medium fit me like an XL.
At least I gained a fierce cleaning rag from this impulsive purchase.