His Wife Was In A Terrible Accident And They Stopped Having Sex. But He Was Shocked When She Told Him To Do THIS.
His wife was in a terrible car accident that left her lower body badly injured. Her long road to recovery meant that they couldn't have sex for two and a half years. Just when he thought everything was going to be okay, however, she told him to do this...
My wife was injured in a terrible car accident 7 months ago. She had gone to drop off one of her friends, and on her way back home her car collided with a minivan in a high speed crash. The car was our second car (it was an old model without airbags) and its hood was crushed. The entire front of the vehicle caved inwards but the most damage was done on the driver side door. The entire frame collapsed inwards and the entire pressure was put on the lower half of her body.
She had 3 fractured vertebrae and a broken pelvic girdle. Her sacrum and ilium had almost shattered into pieces. Her left femur was also broken in 2 places. She had lost control of her left leg for a while. Fortunately, she survived. She spent 3 months in the hospital and the first few weeks in the ICU. Then, she was allowed to come home.
Here's what the neurosurgeon and orthopedic surgeon told me : She would live. She would make a full recovery after two years. It would take her a couple of years more after that to start running again. Because she didn't move after the accident, a lot of danger was avoided. Had she moved even a bit, she would've lost control of the bottom half of her body. But she would never be able to have children.
I brought her home. She had 4 doctor appointments per week. She had a physiotherapist come in every morning. She was bedridden for the first month. Then, with my help and a walking aid, she was able to move around the house. I fed her, bathed her, slept next to her. I have a job that allows me to work from home and that was super helpful.
Now to the crisis.
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Both of us had extremely high libidos. Sex was great and we used to have sex at least 5 times a week.
The doctor told me that her that she would not be able to have sex for two and a half years and even after that we'd have to be extremely careful.
I didn't care. I was just lucky that the love of my life was alive and was recovering.
I had never brought up the topic of sex because I knew that it would make her feel terrible. A month ago she said if she asked me if I was still attracted to her. I kissed her and told her, yes. Why ? Because I meant it. She still had a terrific body and is one of the most beautiful girls I have ever met. She smiled and we went back to watching TV.
The day before yesterday, I heard her crying in her room. I ran inside asking if she was in pain or something. She said no and said she wanted to be alone for a while. I asked again if I could do something but she insisted that I couldn't. I obliged and left.
That evening she told me that she wanted to talk to me. I went in and sat next to her. Then she looked up at me with a very serious face. For those who've been in relationships with a partner long enough, you know that when he/she is about to say something deadly serious, they have their way of doing this. I knew the instant I looked at her that whatever she was about to say, she was dead serious about it.
She said, "I'm okay with you sleeping with other women". There was a pit in my stomach. I literally lost my breath.
I thought she meant that she was leaving me.
I asked her what she meant. She explained to me seriously that she was not kidding here and that she had taken the time and thought about it. She said to me that I still had my good years and that she'd be okay with me having one night stands so that I'm not always sexually frustrated.
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I got a little offended on the inside. Simply because it meant that she thought that I was acting fussy because I wasn't getting laid or something. That was totally not the case. But I didn't let this reaction of mine reflect on the outside. I simply told her that it was a crazy idea. I told her that I loved her and that I still found her very sexy and that I could wait for a couple of years.
I got up because I needed to get some air. She literally pushed me back down onto the chair. She said that she had thought about it and she wanted me to do this. She said that if we stay like this I'll get sick of her in two years. She said that she didn't want to get better only to have me dump her. I told her that she was acting crazy. She said that I was still young and attractive and could easily get someone for one night stands. Every word she said then was like acid.
I stormed off.
The next day, it was the same routine (physiotherapy, breakfast, bath and so on), but I was cold towards her. Again she said that she was serious about this.
I walked out again. I was furious. Then I thought about it. I thought hard for two hours. Two years was a long time, but I loved her. This could turn our relationship toxic. She was saying this now, but she would feel terrible knowing that her husband was having sex with someone else. I didn't care what people thought, but for the first time in my adult life (or at least after what seemed like a long time) I cried. I cried long and hard.
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Before I even thought of doing anything on the physical front, I had to check with her doctors. So I talked to the doctor who first took over her case. This guy is seriously the best doctor I have ever known. Even though he behaves professionally, he is so open and friendly that I felt no problem talking to him about sex.
I told him plain and simple that my wife was craving intimacy and that it's affecting our marriage and her emotional health. He gave me an understanding smile. He reminded me that he had told me when she was in the ICU after the accident that our marriage will go through a very tough phase. And that it will test every bit of our self control but we have to, if she is to make a full recovery.
Then again he told me that he agreed that something needed to be done. He said that oral sex on either side is completely, completely forbidden. He warned me that we should not try anything stupid otherwise she'd have to live with the consequences forever.
So my wife and I have gotten into a routine where we have this sexting/dirty talk build up until I come home from work and though we don't have sex right now, it still helps us to feel like were heading back to normalcy.
This is again a short term solution and I know that very soon shell want more, but Im taking small steps at this point, in what I hope is the right direction. Shes my wife and I dont want to see her hurt. I want to see her walk and jump again. I dont want to see her in pain and I want all this to be over so that we can go back to normal.
She keeps asking for more but instead of flat out saying "no", I plead with her to wait for a little while. I ask it as a personal favor and she reluctantly obliges, which Im thankful for. Shes getting better every day and I feel like were at a better place in our relationship now.
To those of you who are in such a situation, heres some advice : These are trying times. Theyll push and pull your bond to the limits and you will feel helpless at times, and you might want to shut yourself away from it all. The tunnel might seem too long and you might not see the light yet, but just believing that there is light at the end of it all helps a lot. You need to keep that special thing about your relationship alive.
How do we do it, you ask ? Every night, we read our marriage vows to each other. A month ago she had been in terrible pain and the doctors had done their work and left. I felt like shit because I couldnt help her. The next day, for some reason she was extremely cranky and rude and I was frustrated. I went out of the room and slammed the door shut. I heard her crying inside and I felt terrible. I just wanted to run away from it all. Then my eye fell on the plaque that we got engraved with our vows. I picked it up and read them again and again. I realized why I had to stick through it all, why I had to wait for these two years, why I had to be stronger. It was simply because I loved her more than I loved myself.
In sickness and in health
She was asleep when I entered the room that evening. I sat next to her and started reading our vows out loud. When I looked up, she was smiling at me with tears in her eyes.
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History is made on a daily basis.
Indeed, there is little more exciting than having witnessed the accomplishments of people like Barack Obama, Stacey Abrams, and Greta Thunberg knowing that they have firmly reserved a space for themselves in history books.
Of course, most of the people who paved the way to make the world what it is today have long since passed away.
Not all of them, though!
It may surprise you to learn that there are people who made an indelible impression on history who are still much alive today.
Some of whom even continue to make a difference to this very day
Redditor enginearz was eager to hear about historical figures people were surprised to learn were still alive, leading them to ask:
"What famous person from history is still alive?"
Forever Leaving His Name In Science
"He's the only currently living man with an element on the periodic table named after him."- snowflake247
Quite The Story To Tell
"Last human to hold the title of Tsar, as leader of the Kingdom of Bulgaria."
"He was exiled along with his family when the Soviets invaded Bulgaria in 1944."
"In 1990, after the fall of the Soviet Union, Simeon returned from exile to Bulgaria and July 2001, was democratically elected prime minister."
"The private citizen is now 85."- DirectionNew5328
Making Nature Cool For Decades
"David Attenborough."- random_username_96You Can Do It Uoftartsci GIF by U of T Faculty of Arts & ScienceGiphy
The Fought For Freedom And Justice
"The last surviving airman of the battle of Britain."
"He is 103 years old."
"He helped with the liberation of Auschwitz."
"He is 99 years old."
"He was a prosecutor at the Nuremberg trials."
"He is 102 years old."- Ashtar-the-Squid
"The last living member of the german anti-nazi resistance group 'White Rose".
"Most well-known members were the sibling Sophie and Hans Scholl, who were executed by the Nazis when they were identified."- ChrisTinnef
The One Who Made One Giant Leap For Mankind
"Buzz Aldrin, and I’m not even American."- mukaltinState Of The Union Salute GIF by MSNBCGiphy
Opening Doors For So Many Others
"She was one of the first black kids to go to an all-white school."
"There is a famous picture of that first day."- mumwifealcoholic
He Continues To Surprise Us
"Ozzy Osbourne."- CaptinDerpI
Admirably Defying So Many Odds
"98 years old."- Back2BachJimmy Carter Drilling GIF by GIPHY NewsGiphy
We've Still Got Two Out Of Four
"Paul and Ringo"- HMKingHenryIX
Inching Close To The Big One Double Oh...
And Still Practically Perfect In Every Way
"Julie Andrews."- aslrulesjulie andrews snap GIFGiphy
Who Could Forget About Dick Van Dyke ?!?!?!?!
"Everyone just forgetting about Dick Van Dyke, he's like 97 and still going."
"If you've never heard of him, he played in Marry Poppins, along with a bunch more movies"- Longjumping_Drag2752
And Still Stunning
"Sophia Loren is still kicking."- The_REAL_McWeasel
Continuing To Go Where No Man Has Gone Before
"William Shatner doesn't look it but that dude is in his 90s wtf."- flubberF*ckWilliam Shatner Fun GIF by Shark WeekGiphy
Perhaps what's most admirable, is that even when these astonishing people do eventually pass, they will continue to live on and change the world with the remarkable work they did.
We all indulge in fast food from time to time.
Even if we know what we're eating isn't exactly healthy, sometimes the salty, fatty mass-produced food is the only thing we want.
Resulting in our making weekly, if not daily, visits to a nearby chain.
Then, of course, there are the chains that we make every effort to avoid.
We've likely tried places at least once simply because everyone is always talking about them.
But after having one bite, we have trouble seeing exactly what all the fuss was about and vow to never return.
Even if it might be the only option at a rest stop or even the only available food for miles, we instead opt to wait and be hungry.
Redditor BungOnMimosas was curious to hear what people considered to be the most overhyped fast food chains around, leading them to ask:
"What do you think are the most overrated fast-food chains? Why?"
"Food As It Should Be"... Or Not...
"I know it's not technically 'fast food', but Panera Bread pisses me off."
"Insanely expensive for extremely average food." - Reddit
"Their quality has decreased so much in the past few years and they’ve added weird sh*t to their menu like pizza and chicken sandwiches."
"Massive identity crisis and crap food."- asm233
Things Ain't What They Used To Be...
"All of them, now that they charge real restaurant prices."- P00pf4rt5
"As much as I hate to say it, McDonald's is the only place that I can think of that the quality hasn't changed much."
"I mean, that's a pretty low bar, but it is what it is."- gnatman66happy ronald mcdonald GIF by McDonald's CZ/SKGiphy
"The majority of them, especially the really big ones (McDonald's, Wendy's, BK, Pizza Hut, etc)."
"The prices are no longer fast food prices and the quality is not there like it used to be."
"Far better local options that cost roughly the same at the end of the day."- senorita_diablo
Consistency Is Key...
"You can go to the same location three separate times, have the food made by the same staff, and receive 3 wildly different results."- AndrewLampart
Not So Popular Anywhere, It seems...
"KFC in France became so bad."- SterBout
"KFC."- calm4ufried chicken animation GIF by octavioterolGiphy
Likely Won't Go National...
"Idk how wide spread they are, but in the Buffalo NY area there is a chain called Mighty Taco."
"They were even voted best tacos a few years ago."
"It is absolutely terrible food."
"I’ve tried to like it and given them 3 chances."
"Each time I couldn’t eat more than a couple bites."
"Absolutely terrible and I’m disgusted even thinking about their sour vomit in a tortilla."- aa-2020
"I think I’ve answered this question before but definitely for me, it’s Subway."
"Nothing but a giant hunk of bread."
"I’m editing this to add that part of my anger about Subway is how good it used to be."
"I can remember the days of nearly a whole can of tuna salad delicious sub."
"And a Veggie sub with Swiss cheese and piles of yummy veggies and the sweet Vidalia onion sauce."
"It’s all gone to sh*t."
"I would’ve been perfectly OK with increasing price but the big drop in quality pissed me off."
"Oh woe is me with my first world problems."- Mysterious-Region640football ok GIF by Subway ColombiaGiphy
Quantity Doesn't Guarantee Quality...
"Starbucks is a scam."- cmkeller62
Tasty, But Not Worth It...
"I’m going to say Five Guys."
"Not because the food isn’t good, but because I’m not paying $20 for a burger meal."- 2PacTookMyLunchMoney
"Dairy queen grill and Chill for sure."
"I worked at one for a lil' while and 1 burger combo is $14.56 CAD."- lolidk13Ice Cream Miracle Treat Day GIF by Children's Miracle Network HospitalsGiphy
And Not In A Good Way...
Big Kahuna Burger, it kills you."-Darklock2022
No two people have the same taste in food.
Some people know to avoid crappy food, while others eat literally nothing else.
There are several movies I've watched so many times I think the viewings outnumber the days I've lived.
And much like a favorite tv series or movie, who wouldn't love to start again anew?
Experiencing that first time but with that feeling of... "I'm gonna love this forever."
We never appreciate the first time enough.
But that's life.
Warning: there are spoilers below.
Redditor Jacale1 wanted to discuss all the movies we wish we could experience new all over again, so they asked:
"What is one movie that you wish you could watch again for the first time?"
There are a lot of mystery movies I'd love to redo, just to figure out the killer sooner.
Gasps!Raining The Shawshank Redemption GIFGiphy
"The Shawshank Redemption."
"A great nominee. Will never forget gasping when that rock went through the poster, and again when the warden pushed his arm through and ripped it down.... wow."
Over and Over
"Edge of Tomorrow."
"Is it bad that I got enjoyment knowing Tom Cruise died a lot in that movie. Never on screen, but it happened. Over and over. I hate that guy. How the hell was he the same height as Nichole Kidman in the movies they acted in together. Rhetorical question."
"Honestly the whole reason I watched the movie to begin with is that he kept dying over and over."
“'Stardust'- if you don’t know you’ll never know."
"I’m surprised that a fantasy romcom can be so enjoyable, for a straight guy. It’s just the right balance between fantasy, comedy, drama, and romance. Most of the female cast are very easy on the eyes too."
"I swooned when Yvaine glows while dancing on the ship, and when she talks emphatically to the mouse in the caravan. This movie has a lot of A listers, and they deliver. I’m not gonna lie, I have probably watched it half a dozen times."
"The book has so much more in it, even having seen the movie you'll feel like a child again."
"I watched this with my wife, who has never seen it, and that's about as close as you can get to watching it for the first time. It really displayed just how good the movie is. Also I love Aliens just as much for different reasons."
"Came here looking for this! I watched it for the first time with my dad when I was 11, and it’s one of my favorite childhood memories. Amazing movie."
Hey Arnoldsci-fi GIFGiphy
"I first watched this as a kid when I knew Arnold was the good guy in movies, and I had not seen T1. I wish I watched T2 for the first time after having watched T1. The mall scene would have been even more mind blowing."
T2 was definitely bada**!! I'd redo that.
"Bro, I'll go further. If I could watch the Nicholson covered in blood scene or the final scene between Damon and Wahlberg, I would be so freaking happy. The sheer acting clout on display for the first is near a masterclass while the last scene was just so business like, I'd love to relive that scene with fresh eyes. I love this freaking movie."
"The original Star Wars. Man, that blew our minds! It totally changed movies from then on. We'd never seen such incredible special effects. The story was so fun and the experience was amazing."
"Even though I’m not a franchise fan, I can get behind this answer. Because when I saw it first run, I was fourteen, and nothing like it had ever been done. I think it was the first movie where the special effects were the movie? Now that’s standard. It’s a reason people see many films now."
"So, for sheer originality, I’d watch it again, but only for the first time. I barely recall the second movie."
"The 6th Sense. I audibly gasped in the theater. All the clues are obvious on rewatch but that first time, before anyone knew M. Knight Shyamalan was a twist guy... wow."
"I never got to see it the first time. My girlfriend at the time (now wife) inadvertently let slip the ending thinking I had already seen it. I have never seen the point in watching it knowing the ending. But I did enjoy The Village."
"I watched it again and it was more of a sad film than a thriller."
"Spirited Away. I was blown away by how beautiful and bonkers it is."
"Saaaaame! Every single Studio Ghibli film, but Spirited Away especially! I’ve still watched it a million times though, and it’s always special. If I’m in a bad mood that film always cheers me up!"
"Also, Avatar-the last air bender. I know it’s not a movie, but I felt like it deserved a mention. I’ve watched the whole thing several times, and it’s always great, but I do wish I could forget it and rewatch it. I’m 35 btw... lol."
Great Scott!Doc Brown Shock GIF by Back to the Future TrilogyGiphy
"Back to the Future."
"I'd love to watch that in the cinemas... Now from the future."
Now I want to go to the movies.
There is no one way to anybody's heart or libido.
Sexy doesn't always have to equal raunchy.
I've known people turned on by music, books, nature, and even funerals (don't ask).
What starts someone's engine is a mystery.
Redditor asexyjohn18 wanted to hear about all the things that get people in the mood, so they asked:
"What is a non sexual trait that turns you on?"
I love a walk. A little strut. Nothing like getting the heart racing.
Tingleshair GIF by SB NationGiphy
"Getting my head scratched or having someone run their fingers through my hair."
"Same. It’s so pleasant when the tingles run down your spine... ;-) "
"When a girl genuinely laughs at jokes I make."
"I remember being on a first date with a beautiful woman and I made a bit of corny joke/comment and she laughed at it. I remember thinking, damn, wait till I get to my good stuff. I did get to my good material apparently as we were married. She gives me as many laughs as I give her."
"Kindness. When I see someone going out of their way to help others for no other reason than it’s the right thing to do… that is some truly attractive vibes."
"Apparently it's vanishing from this world really fast. People who show kindness often end up in losses (of course not everytime but most of the time yes). It really breaks my heart."
"Probably the sexiest thing out there. Someone can be smoking hot, funny, talented, etc. But if they're not kind, they're unattractive."
"Smiling right at me, and men stretching. LAWD HAVE MERCY!!"
"I have trouble smiling at women. Is this a turnoff for them? And ones I like are really hard to smile at. Because I know it's always going to be some really weird big smile if I am crushing which makes me feel like a super duper creep."
SimplicityHappy I Love You GIF by Warner Bros. DeutschlandGiphy
"Sorry if this is too kinky but i like it when they care about me."
"Too far man. You need to rethink your choices."
Sometimes it's all about the heart.
Eye 2 Eyei see you GIF by VH1Giphy
"When a guy explains something to you in a calm and understanding voice. Bonus points for gentle eye contact."
"Being crazily intelligent. Screw dirty talk, I want you to explain some unexplainable s**t in my ear."
"Heck yes. My best connections have been with a philosophy/history professor turned chancellor, an environmental engineer, and a neurosurgeon, all 3 Summa cum laude grads and conference speakers in their fields. The downside to genius though is complete absorption in their fields leaving little time for in person connection."
"Everyone should know how to cook. Hunger knows no gender. I like to eat good food so I learned how to cook. I asked my mom one day and she reacted surprised. She was more than grateful to have an opportunity to teach me the ‘finer’ aspects of cooking, as she called it. Lol. I love food."
"My girlfriend, now wife, likes to jokingly say I got her into bed with a well seasoned steak and homemade fries. I mean we did sleep together almost immediately after we finished dinner so maybe she’s right. That old saying comes to mind. 'The quickest way to the heart is though the stomach.'"
"When I ask my husband for help when I repot my plants and he delicately cleans and moves the leaves. He is a mechanical engineer and he works with huge pieces of industrial equipment, seeing him so tenderly caring for my plants just makes me melt."
Limbs A LotExcited Thomas Lennon GIF by ABC NetworkGiphy
"Men doing intricate work with their hands."
"I second this, also someone who can play guitar/bass real real well... just watching their hands, whoa mama."
Well, it seems that just about anything can get someone in the mood, especially if you're kind, courteous, and especially a good cook.
Anything to add? Let us know in the comments below!