Humans rarely agree on anything anymore.
So it's refreshing when an agreement is reached among peers.
Even if it's usually about simple or dumb stuff.
RedditorBertarioni85wanted all the gents to sit and discuss some of their universal agreements.
"What is something that all men could agree on?"
"The nod really is great and so versatile. It's like a 'What's up man... everything cool' Ya me too. 'Wulp see ya later.' Just perfect."
Jibber_FightRobert Redford Nod GIFGiphy
"If there can be an empty urinal between us, make it so."
"There are men out there that break this rule! I was the only one, and at the far right end of a row of 4 or 5 urinals. Man walks in and pulls up right beside me, unzips, and let’s her flow, all while audibly exhaling in relief.
When you gotta go!
"That we are happy we get the short bathroom line."
To add to this, I still marvel in amazement and am grateful when I walk into a bathroom at a stadium or sporting event and it's just an endless column of empty urinals. Then you see the ladies bathroom line wrapping around two different corners. There's so much room for activities in the men's bathroom."
"Lady Professor in college (2008) said I’d make an incredible husband to my wife someday. Girl at the drive thru line said I had a cool car in September of 2015. Lady gas station attendant complimented my outfit that day and said I had a good vibe (2018). Cashier said I was handsome while ringing me up a couple weeks ago. Point is we never forget when we get complimented out of the blue."
"Click the tongs a couple times to make sure they work first."
"Makes me feel like a crab… a very powerful crab."
DEcrypt1SouLHappy We Did It GIF by StoryfulGiphy
Wow. Guys are so easy. Like super easy...
"Whenever we pick up a drill we have to do the bzzt... bzzt twice. No more, no less."
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Sticks and Stones
"I picked it up because it’s like, a really good stick."
"I wonder if that's instinctive. I've read before that human anatomy is almost perfectly engineered for throwing and thrusting spears. Maybe men have evolved to be able to identify really good sticks and even now we're drawn to them as a vestigial trait because instead of relying on claws or teeth, our ancestors needed good spears."
On the X
"Put two men on the phone, and we’ll be done talking in two minutes. Put two men on Xbox live, and oh is it 2:00am? I should probably go to bed… after this game."
"This is so true. A few weeks back a good friend called me at 10 at night because he’s been having a tough time with fighting depression and all that. I talked to him for a minute or two on the phone, cheered him up a bit and offered to keep the chat going on xbox live. Turned into an hour and half of a good time talking and playing COD."
Gotta have it.
"It's better to have and not need than to need and not have."
"It's so bloody annoying not having the right tool for the job when you need it. I so long for the day when I will have a fully equipped garage with every tool I would ever need, to fix everything that needs fixing."
"My sister's car has cutlery, both steel and disposable. Have sewing kit, a flask, a bento box, and a complete stationery set. But, they don't even have a freaking umbrella and jumper in the car. Like, wtf. And mind you, we live in a tropical country where you should always assume every day is a rainy day."
"Sometimes... I really am thinking about nothing. Literally... Flatline, nobody home, crickets in the field."
concequenceEllen Page Sony GIF by FlatlinersGiphy
Behind the Walls
"We all want a secret passage in our house, somewhere. We all want to pick up that stick we walked past that looks like a gun or a sword."
"Yeah always wanted that since a kid. Promised myself that plus a snooker room, arcade room, and a room that is completely bare except a single mirror on each surface (Inc floor and ceiling)."
"I read, wether true or not I dunno, that NASA used to have a room like that as a last test for astronauts as a surprise and if you fell over then you fail. As an adult I have an Xbox. Not so much the other stuff."
"When you strap something down you have to slap the top of it and assure that it isn’t going anywhere."
"I work at a granite countertop shop and when I was loading trucks anytime we finished one me and my buddy would look at each other, shake the cart and say, 'Oh yeah this *itch ain’t going anywhere.'"
"This is true. Clacking kitchen tongs to make sure they work is stupid though. I'm totally doing it next time I use them and every time after... but it's still stupid."
What is Caught
"Zippers are dangerous."
"I’ve never understood the appeal, jeans (or any pants) on bare butt sucks majorly, is crazy uncomfortable. I also don’t want the essence of all all over the inside of my pants because it’s easier to wash underwear than pants. If someone’s wearing underwear but still getting their stuff caught in a zipper, how???"
"We have to hold our mouth a certain way when we are doing something technical."
BCEXPNot Working Technical Difficulties GIF by FoojiGiphy
Living in Fear
"The fear of thinking that you will get kidney stones one day."
"I had it once because of bad habits (coke instead of water and too much sugar in general). Dismissed those habits and never came back in 20 years. Drink water, be fit, will never happen!"
"Fear? I’ve already had to get two removed… the pain was unbearable. And having the tube removed after the procedure was… less than comfortable."
You never know...
"Sometimes my sex drive in an inconvenience. It seriously over powers my normal thought processes at the worst times and then I have this internal battle. Lol."
"The power of erections can lead us to marriages, 4 kids and a minivan, a dark alley, the church bathroom, the boat ramp, or even in a random brothel in Thailand after a drunken night out with the boys. You never know."
"If you are kicking a stone whilst walking and you miss a kick and it gets left behind you are not supposed to go back to kick it again (and you know also feel sad)."
gdevil334mad homer simpson GIFGiphy
All the Things
"I find it fascinating that no matter where we are from we can all agree on similar stuff. Like nodding, tonging, not taking the urinal next to somebody, never really receiving compliments as men. I'm from Germany and I can definitely relate, I think you guys from all over the world can as well."
"That being said, men can just hang out and not speak a single word for hours. My best friend and me would hang out on a daily basis when we were younger (am 33 now) and just watch TV, play Fifa and smoke some weed. His sister is still impressed to this day, later on her boyfriend joined us too."
"But sometimes when we had full blown conversations, almost to the point where we would fight each other it was about some random, unimportant bulls**t like 'if we were sharks would we still smoke weed' or stuff like that hahaha."
Ah men. What a quirky part of the species.