Parents Share The Funniest Things Their Kids Did That They Couldn't Laugh About At The Time

As an experienced parent, people often ask me what my biggest challenges have been.
I'll be honest, aside from the whole "gotta keep 'em alive" thing - the hardest thing about parenting for me has been that I have a loud face and kids are HILARIOUS.
But I'm just supposed to sit here and not laugh!?
Reddit user ViolatingBadgers asked:
"Parents of Reddit, what hilarious thing did your child do that you wanted to laugh at, but had to hold it in because you also didn't want to encourage them?"
If you laugh at the hilarious stuff kids do, they'll do it more. Positive reinforcement in action.
But that's how you get kids who call others peasants ... plus all this stuff.
Slap-a-Pus
"My boys could not pronounce the word platypus. They somehow defaulted to 'slap-a-pus.' "
- DiAb505
" 'Oh, a slap-a-pus.' *audible gasp* "
" 'PERRY THE SLAP-A-PUS?!' "
- BronzeAgeTea
"I have changed my ways. Next time I go to the zoo, I will say slap-a-pus"
- KinaGrace96
Peasants
"My five-year-old went through a phase where whenever she was mad, she would call people (or cats, or Lego, or whatever she was upset at) 'Filthy peasants!' "
"She would also say to me, 'Mooom! (Babybrother)'s being impudent!' "
"I worry that without in-person school and being around kids her own age, she's gotten REALLY used to being around just adults and her personal mini-minion."
"She's gonna be a dictator, but there's nothing funnier than an imperiously furious five-year-old."
- WhateverCORE2021
So Delicious
"Just a few nights ago, I pulled a stick of butter out of the fridge to see a perfect bite mark taken from the end."
"I call my 6 year old daughter into the kitchen and now have to keep a straight face as she tells me that she must have left the door open and one of the dogs bit the butter."
"She kept up this story even as I SHOWED her the bite marks, INCLUDING the gap from her missing bottom tooth."
"FINALLY, she admits to it and, when asked why, dramatically says 'I couldn't help it, it just looked so DELICIOUS!' "
- dementedpixie
"My mom would have to hide the sticks of butter in the fridge when I was a toddler."
"I would sneak out of my room in the middle of the night and eat them."
- Singingpineapples
"This is super cute - gross as hell but adorable."
- chriscookbuilds
Seamless
"Not a parent but a teacher."
"This student in one of my high school classes was answering a question and having a bit of trouble. Another kid chimed in to say something, maybe give her a hint I don't know."
"Anyway, she just looked at him and dead pan said 'Eat my bootyhole' and then continued her train of thought without pause. She intended for it to be under her breath, but it came out loud."
"What was so funny was the seamlessness with which she wove it into her sentence."
"It was very hard not to laugh so I sighed very loudly and said her name in a scolding tone. She realized her mistake and apologized and I sat at my desk with my hand covering my face for a full thirty seconds while my whole class laughed."
"I had to take a moment before going 'let’s move on' because I was just trying very hard not to crack up."
- Burn-babe
Excused From The Table
"My daughter was an early talker…so it was always funny to hear this tiny baby say all this big kid stuff."
"One night at dinner my wife was trying to get her to eat some corn and goes: 'See, mommy likes it.' “
"And my kid who was just barely 3 at the time looks at my wife and goes: 'Well then YOU eat it, mother!' ”
"I had to leave the room."
- SeaTie
Spit It Out
"When my son was 4, he was trying to explain something to me. He was so excited about it he kept restarting his sentence."
" 'It was the- it- the- it was a- it was...' etc for a good 3 minutes."
"I jokingly told him to spit it out. He, being 4 and not understanding that it's just a turn of phrase, actually spit on my floor. And then was able to tell me that he likes dinosaurs."
"I suppose... system reset achieved."
- Obligatory_smile
Calmly And Rationally
"My (at the time) three year old shouts 'FUCK!' in the back seat."
"I say, 'Henry! Don't say that word!' "
" 'But daddy, the f*ckin dammit toy fell down,' he calmly and rationally replied in a sing song 3 year old voice."
- johnwalkersbeard
"It's even funnier when they do it not knowing that it's a swear word."
"An acquaintance was peeling potatoes with her toddler in the room when the bag ripped and the potatoes fell out. The mom went 'Oh, f*ck', but then went around her day making food."
"Anyway, maybe two weeks later she and her daughter had the following conversation:"
"Mom: (rhetorically) 'I wonder what kind of food I should cook.' "
"Daughter: 'Oh f*ck!' "
"Mom: 'What did you just say?' "
"Daughter: 'Make oh f*ck! You bought oh f*ck yesterday!' "
"As you can guess, daughter thought that potatoes were called 'oh f*ck.' "
- Enakistehen
Don't Be A Drag
"Except for one band (The Imagination Movers) we never really listened to 'kiddie music' when our son was little."
"So from an early age, he was exposed to the same music that we listen to: mostly 80s/90s pop, Disney music (which my husband likes), classic rock and punk (which I like)."
"One day, when he was in like 2nd grade, his teacher pulled me aside when I went to go pick him up from school."
"Apparently, he'd gotten in trouble because he was having an argument with another boy on the playground at recess. Which that normally wouldn't have been a big deal, but how my son ended the argument was a bit of an issue."
"He told the kid, 'Don't be a drag, just be a queen.' "
"I wanted to bust out howling with laughter, but I didn't. All I could do was apologize to the teacher."
- KnockMeYourLobes
Britches
"Pull-ups (training diapers) have these velcro-like sides that can come apart to adjust the size and for diaper changes."
"My 3yo was putting one on for bedtime and it popped open. I jokingly told her 'Oh no! You burst your britches!' "
"Her response was running off to dad yelling 'I burst my b*tches! I burst my b*tches!' And then she re-enacted the scene and her new catch phrase every night for the rest of the week."
"I about peed myself laughing after I left her room that night."
- St3phiroth
Honey Butter
"My kiddo was 3 when we were out at a New Mexican restaurant. Traditionally we eat sopapillas with honey but this particular restaurant serves honey butter with theirs."
"I slather up a sopa, hand it to her and turn back to the conversation at the table."
"The next thing I hear is her saying, 'This honey butter is sooooo f*cking good!' "
"Her Dad and I glance at each other like, did she just say what I thought she said? I then ask her to repeat herself and sure enough:"
" 'This honey butter is sooo f*cking good!' "
"I had to turn around in my chair and laugh into my elbow before telling her that, while she was not wrong, she couldn't use the f word to describe her satisfaction with her food."
"I still laugh so hard I cry whenever I think about that story. We were at dinner with about 20 family members too!"
- BeeEyeAm
Kraft
"My brother and I had bunk beds when we were little. We used to sneak out, like army crawl all dramatically through the house, grab Kraft singles, and we’d hide the wrappers in the bottom of the top bunk."
"We denied it for weeks until my mom was on the bottom bunk for some reason and found the hole in the top mattress where we stored all the evidence. There were so many cheese wrappers in there. So many."
"No idea how she kept a straight face when she found them."
"I don't know how we ever stomached those single wrapped cheeses alone, and why we were so obsessed. Good times though!"
- shelllllo
Stealth/Slight Of Hand
"While at Six Flags my six year old daughter wanted some gas station quality sunglasses that they were selling for $40. I was absolutely not shelling out that money for such cheap glasses."
"I said no, but we could get a new pair when we stopped for gas."
"I talk to the clerk to return our two kid buggy rental, and we walk the mile from the return back to the car. My older son wants a couple shoulder rides but, my daughter just walks silently the whole way."
"Before she gets in the car seat, she puts on the sunglasses I refused to buy."
"Stealth/slight of hand +7."
"I was supposed to be mad about the theft, but ..."
- juicegooseboost
Boring
"Wife, out of frustration, sarcastically to our 3 year old:"
“ 'It must be f*cking great to stay up rather than sleep during nap time !' "
"3 year old responded: 'No! It's f*cking boring!!!' "
"I didn't wanna die, so I excused myself before cracking up."
- slipshuck
Arrest Record
"Once, as a substitute teacher, I was at an assembly with a group of 1st graders and the local Police Department was visiting."
"An officer was speaking and a kid yelled out 'Do you know my brother? He gets arrested A LOT!' "
"I pulled my sweater over my face to hide my laughter."
- SurferRosa85
Threats
"My son recently threatened to hurt my wife."
"He grabbed her face, squeezed as hard as he could, his little face turned red, and he yelled the worst thing he could think of:"
' 'I'm going to shine a flashlight right in your eye!' "
"I couldn't hold it in. I lost it. Then he threatened me with the same fate for my disrespect, of course."
"He thankfully did not get his flashlight."
- jules083
The Tree She Hides Behind
"We were playing hide and seek in the yard and I found a huge, corn filled pile of shit behind the tree she liked to hide behind."
"She blamed the dog for weeks until the next time we had corn for dinner."
"She finally caved to the truth and admitted the deed."
"She’s 5. And good at secrets."
- xzl830
"You Are Old"
"When my youngest son was 5, he used to walk over to old people and announce to them that they're old."
"He's autistic so he is very blunt and says things as he sees them."
"Just the look of shock on their faces at being called old, and I have to keep a straight face and apologize when I actually want to snort laugh."
- Snoo_46024
Tiny Road Rage
"Family holiday with young grandkids."
"Someone drove down the wrong way at an underground car park and blocked us. One of the adults said 'Oh man' but that was it. No swearing."
"Then a little voice in the back seat said...'f*cking hell!' "
"It was so in context!"
"We all thought it hilarious but had to be the adults and say that wasn't nice to say the F word!"
- MissGreenie
Mommies Diapers
"When my (now 23yo) daughter was about 2, we’d gone to the store to buy groceries and other assorted items including some feminine products."
"The trip took longer than I’d planned and when arrived back home, some expected friends were already there. I apologized for being late, explaining our errands had taken longer than expected."
"My daughter the furthered the explanation by saying, 'Yeah, we had to get mommy some diapers.' ”
- MsTLC_Georgia
Tiny people are just blessed with natural comedic timing.
So tell us, what's the funniest thing you've had to try not to laugh at?
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It's another ordinary day in America.
So of course that means we've already had a mass shooting or two before brunch.
And aside from the mass shootings, the number of single gunshot wounds or deaths is too high to count.
So let's discuss the aftermath.
Let's hear from the people who have faced the barrel of a loaded gun, or were just a casualty going about their day.
What happens after the bullet lands?
***CAUTION - SENSITIVE MATERIAL AHEAD - TRIGGER WARNING***
Redditor notaninterestingacc wanted to hear from the people who have lived the nightmare. They asked:
"Gunshot survivors of Reddit - What does it feel like to get shot?"
Guns are not a joke. Please educate yourself before you purchase.
Then the pin hit...
"I took a 7.62 to the stomach in Afghanistan. Felt like somebody had smacked with like, I dunno, a flyswatter or something. A short sharp smack. Didn’t feel much until I tried to come out of cover and I just... couldn’t. Couldn’t make my body listen to me. Then the pain hit. I’d put it at like, I dunno, an 11/10. Bullet blew off half my liver."
eyeCinfinitee
Thank you EMS...
"Chest, .357 magnum, through sternum, lung, ricochet off of rib, through scapula. Still have half under my shouldblade. Felt like I was stabbed in the chest with a hot fire poker mounted to the bottom of someone's foot when they drop kicked me. Was not expected to survive (severe blood loss), of course. Very good EMS team kept the liquids where they were supposed to and great doctors and nurses kept me going."
mndyerf**kinbusiness
Knocked Back
"I didn't really feel either of mine until about 10 minutes later. Took a grazing shot off my left arm and one in the right hip that went out my back thankfully missing my kidney. The arm felt like a bee sting the hip knocked me back a step the adrenalin at the time masked the pain."
richwith9
The Masked Men
"I was shot during a home robbery. I’m probably one of The luckiest people alive. The bullet no joke scratched my cheek and then went through the top of my ear and also a bullet grazed my wrist and opened it up. I didn’t feel anything but just liquid running down my face and my wrist was burning."
"Scariest night of my life and RIP Christian. Miss you so much buddy. Here is proof. We... https://www.chron.com/neighborhood/katy/crime-courts/article/Man-charged-in-attempted-burglary-apartment-6236325.php Authorities said Burke and Brandon Fries, 21, fought the suspects for their guns, which were fired during the struggle."
"The two masked men fled, and investigators initially did not have any information about which direction they went or whether they escaped from the scene by car. Both Burke and Fries had been shot and were transported to Hermann Memorial Hospital in Katy. Burke was pronounced dead upon arrival at the emergency room, less than four miles away.”
Brandonfries28
Like a Rock
"I got shot in the ankle when I was 10. Honestly I thought a rock hit me. Just a slight stinging feeling. Didn't really hurt, I even kept running with my bike. Later at the hospital was a different story. The doctor tried to remove the bullet without putting me under."
"He said the pain medicine would make me forget everything. He gave up after a few minutes of hell. And, whatever he gave me didn't work as described, but it did oddly make everyone look purple from what I remember. So maybe it half worked? lol."
adamchilders
People really? How in the world do y'all get firearms?
Fleshed Off...
"Right thigh, 9mm, grazing shot across the front of the leg about 4 inches above the knee. It plowed a channel of skin and some flesh off the front. It felt searing hot like someone had laid a hot piece of metal on my leg for a second. Then, the pain went away for a while until the adrenaline wore off. It honestly hurt worse 6 hours later than it did when it happened."
morgen_benner
A slight pinch...
"I was randomly shot while walking down the street with my girlfriend in 2013. I didn't fall to the ground or anything like that. Walked into a store and told them to call the cops. It didn't hurt too bad at first. A slight pinch. The heat builds up and the pain comes in. Some throbbing as the blood pumps out. I was extremely lucky as the bullet lodged between my lower right ribs in the back just above my kidney."
"The aftermath was a really achey back. What I remember most was how everyone around me except for my girlfriend just walked around us like nothing happened. I was suffering and potentially dying and everyone just ignored it. 'Not my problem' I suppose. I lost a lot of faith in people that day."
SoggyPastaPants
Not the Head
"I accidentally discharged my 9 and I was hit in the head. While it was going on I honestly did not feel any pain but everything slowed way down. Healing and recooperating was the hardest. My mouth and jaw was wired shut for several months. Had to have complete facial reconstruction surgery."
"Had to take a piece of bone from my skull and graph it to my nose just so I could have a nose. I also had to have a feeding tube for almost a whole year. I've recovered fully and I'm very lucky. I remember mostly everything. Something's from the incident I don't remember, but for the most part, I have my memories in tact."
No-Kick1632
It Burns...
"My gf was shot, not me, but she said it felt hot and like impact but not particularly painful until much later. She was in shock and went to the hospital, after hours she said it started to hurt."
DntShadowBanMeDaddy
"This was my response too. It feels incredibly hot. It's like getting hit with a bee that's on fire. It burns like hell. But then, and only later, does is f**king hurt. The part two is that you might think you understand pressure, but get shot. It doesn't just hurt, it mashes into you."
trebuchetfight
Ricochet
"A good friend of mine got hit with a ricochet from a 9mm that hit his calf, there was drive by about a block down. He was outside of the bar smoking a cig when it happened, ran inside and felt his leg burning but decided to keep drinking. He had about 3 more drinks before someone mentioned he was bleeding… went to the ER absolutely hammered and was fine after surgery."
PM_Me_UrRightNipple
Please stay sober when handling a weapon. Please be careful in general.
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It's never attractive to gloat.
Nor does superiority ever come off as a particularly attractive attribute.
But, consciously or not, some people speak or behave in a way that immediately suggests that they think they deserve to be treated differently, i.e better than others.
Or that they believe they simply are better than other people.
A recent Redditor was curious what sort of behavior struck other people as elitist or arrogant behavior by asking:
"What screams "I am entitled"?"
Where's the fire?
"Impatience in situations where it should be just universally understood that you need patience".- c7hu1hu.
Positions of power.
"I will have you fired!"- Vergo27.
"Generally just leaving something for someone else to deal with."- Splatty_boi_420.
Sorry, but I was here first.
"People who cut in line."- Chad_Farthousse.
"People who ignore lines and cut in the front, like their time is more important than every other person patiently queueing."- ofsquire.
No one loves a tattletale.
“I’ll call my dad and tell him what you did!”- ROAM300.
Ever heard of quid pro quo?
"When they do something to you and think it’s fine but when you do it in return and they freak out."- Silvero129.
Name your price.
"I work as a ticket seller for a ski resort."
"My favorite entitled person is the guy who, upon finding out that the kid's ski lesson was sold out, offered to pay extra if I would kick someone else's kid out so his kid could have a spot."- Floranagirl.
Perhaps one of the most obvious ways to unwittingly show off your entitlement?
By being oblivious to how entitled you are.
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There's something about the woods that creeps me out. Listen here, people: I'm a city guy. The idea of getting lost out there freaks me out. No thank you. I wasn't made for that. The rest of you who like to go camping and stuff? You do you. I'll stick with my running water.
But maybe I've seen too many horror movies. After all, if I saw some creepy stuff in the woods I'd definitely run in the other direction. And so would you, right? Right?
People shared their best stories with us after Redditor shantics asked the online community,
"What have you seen in the woods that you can’t explain?"
"I stepped on what I thought was a small rock but it turned out to be weird and gelatinous. I've also seen tombstones in the woods."
his_eminence56
You just suprised it. Rocks are soft and squishy, they just tense up when you touch them! /s
"I was hiking through the remnants..."
"I was hiking through the remnants of a remote, long-abandoned town and the surrounding area. To get to as far into the woods as I was, you had to cross fallen trees over a creek three times. I had just crossed the third "bridge" and was about five miles in and something blue caught my eye just ahead of me."
"There was a man, in his sixties at least, wearing blue satin pajamas, sitting in a tree. The closer I got to him the louder he laughed; it wasn't a maniacal laugh, but it set off all the alarms in my head nevertheless. He also wasn't wearing any shoes and looked well-groomed/cleaned."
"I gave him a friendly nod as I passed and he just kept laughing. Then it stopped. I turned and he was gone. There was no branch cracking, plants rustling, nothing... He was just gone."
"Still rubs me the wrong way. The area I was in was a pretty rough hike, very secluded. Not very many people venture as deep as I was that day. No idea what was going on there."
mrwitch
“Over the Third Bridge” would be a great title for a spooky book or movie.
"Neat as a pin..."
"Fully decorated Xmas tree. Middle of summer. Neat as a pin it was, as if it had just been finished. Who ever did it came back at some point and cleaned it up, because it wasn't there next I did that trail a week or so later."
OldWomanintheWoods
This one’s not that uncommon actually. Lots of folks will decorate a tree in remembrance of someone out in the woods. Sucks when they don’t clean them up though.
"It's an interesting..."
"In Japan. A hotel was abandoned before it was ever finished being built. It only became a cement skeleton, about 5 stories high. It was left that way to eventually mold back into the forest around it."
It’s an interesting small building to explore. There are halls that are unlevel to the point of hitting your head on the ceiling (think: Willy Wonka)."
"There are stairwells that lead to nothing and one that leads to an unintentional hole in a cement wall. And on the top floor (but “inside” - as in, under the “roof”), is an old car - all smashed up - with seemingly no reason or method to have been up there."
[deleted]
This reminds me of those old abandoned amusement parks that pretty much exist to destroy me mentally.
"I once walked..."
"I once walked through the undergrowth (i.e. off the trail) with my then-girlfriend when we came across this spot where a few empty plastic bags were lying on the ground (strange because the woods are otherwise super clean), a pair of gloves and, most confusingly, the official ID card (= passport) of a young woman."
Minister_of_Joy
I would freak out and call the cops. That sounds like a murder scene.
"Many plastic bags..."
"Many plastic bags with nothing really in them but random odd things tied to trees. Sure, it could have been a homeless person but us kids att (like 12+) of us lived in those small woods behind the church every single day. We never saw anyone like that, ever. Passing through I guess, but why so many bags...still wonder."
WiseOwlBear
Do we want to know what was in them? Probably not.
"When I was a teenager..."
"When I was a teenager, I worked at a fireworks stand that was run by my friend's family. It was in a rural area: they owned a few acres of land, had the fireworks tent at the front of the property and the house towards the back, but no lights in between. My friend's mother would prepare dinner for all the workers and we'd take turns going back to the house for dinner."
"One night, I was going to the house for dinner by myself. I felt something on my arm. I thought a bug might have landed on me, but it was really dark so I couldn't see anything. I stopped walking for a second. Then I started hearing this low, raspy breathing right next to me."
"There weren't any people around me and it didn't sound anything like a bug. It was like a slow, asthmatic wheeze."
"I started getting really freaked out. I reached my hand down to my arm and felt... something larger than I expected. I furiously rubbed my hands all across my body to try and dislodge whatever this thing was, then ran as fast as I could to the house. When I finally got to the safety of the house, I could see a small red mark on my arm, but that was it."
"To this day, it's probably the most freaked out I've ever been."
[deleted]
Chills reading this! Nooo thank you!
"Several very large holes..."
"Really big holes. Several very large holes, fairly close to each other, that seem to serve no purpose. Ten feet wide, deep enough that if you jumped in you’d have to have help getting out. Was someone preparing to bury a bunch of people? Was someone punishing their kid by making them dig holes? Did they hear there was buried treasure out there?"
"We’ve never figured it out."
theyarnilama
How far apart? How neat were the holes? In a plantation or natural wood? Accessible by a small excavator?
"I once saw a huge pile of cat and dog skulls and bones about 100m from my cabin so we sold the cabin as soon as we could. It was creepy."
[deleted]
This definitely sounds like the beginning of a horror film. Did the ghosts follow you? Please report back.
"There's a small patch..."
"There's a small patch of woods where I live. You could walk across it in less than an hour. It's entirely safe and has marked trails. People somehow manage to get lost in there and I can't explain that."
ThadisJones
Did they stumble across the bounds of time and space? That might explain it. But you might be underestimating how many people lack a sense of direction.
None of this makes you want to go out into the woods, huh? Yeah, we thought so. We'll pass the next time we get an offer to go camping somewhere.
Have some stories of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
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We're all not geniuses.
Everybody has varying degrees of knowledge and brain power.
And that is ok.
Though some of us are really lacking in any sense and every once and awhile people like to sugarcoat that fact when they call us out.
"Bless your heart."
That's a big one in the South. Means... "I like you, but Lord are you missing marbles."
Redditor MrMadJoker wanted to know the most creative ways to describe people who lack a few IQ points.
They asked:
"What's your favorite euphemism for a dumb person?"
"You're missing a few pieces of the puzzle."
Said to me from my Geometry teacher. Now I know what he meant.
And... he was right.
Cents
"I could give them a penny for their thoughts and I'd get change back."
hopefulsite126
The Cells
"He's got 2 brain cells left, and they're fighting for 3rd place."
Striking_Yoghurt_690
"One more neuron and he'd have a synapse."
Bad Wheel
"The wheel is spinning but the hamster's dead."
ofsquire
"My old english teacher used to say 'I can smell the hamster burning.'"
cardew-vascular
"Bruh how u gonna do hamsters like that. Im dead 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣"
Mulberry0
YOU
"You're the reason we have warning labels."
ofsquire
"My bosses comment about my non-too bright coworker 'you can’t get mad at her- she’s the reason shampoo has directions and she probably still f**ked it up…'”
Smoopiebear
"You see? Because of me, they have a warning label."
WantToBeBetterAtSex
Ok... some of this is some good comedy.
Or Puppet...
"I'm an American, but I love when British folks call people Muppets. For a long time Europe has led the way in insult innovation, and I think it's time we caught up."
JonSnow31391
Vanilla?
"Less useful than a chocolate teapot."
Pokeybumfun
"My Physics teacher used to say 'more pointless than a chocolate fireguard' whenever we had pencils that were too blunt for graph drawing hahaha."
ElegantEagle13
"German version of that is 'dumber than a piece of bread.'"
00192737292
I Like Turkey
"Shouldn't be left in charge of a ham sandwich."
accomplished_loaf
"I had a college professor who had met Gaddafi (God have mercy on him), the late dictator of Libya, and his impression was 'it would've been a shame to put that lunatic in charge of 10 chickens.'"
thefuzzybunny1
"Lol... for some reason this reminds me of Gordon Ramsay saying on Kitchen Nightmares that he wouldn’t trust a guy to run his bath, let alone his restaurant 😅."
thxitsthedepression
No Top Floor
"Your elevator doesn't go to the top floor. You're as sharp as a marble. You'd be stuck for an answer at hello (that's from Classy Freddie Blassie you pencil necked geeks)."
ferox965
"People tell me my elevator doesn't go the whole way to the top floor but I don't even HAVE an elevator."
"People tell me that too! We should go buy one~"
one_angry_custodian
Space
"My grandpa says: 'A lot of space between them ears.' Which is my absolute favorite, because a lot of people don't get it at first and just enforces the meaning."
Blobfish_Blues
Not all of us are going to break IQ records. That's ok. But these descriptions are funny.
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