The first time we strike out on our own, we're 100% guaranteed to be shocked by all the little things we need but didn't ever think to buy. We're looking at you, garbage cans! That shock is only multiplied when we purchase our own home. Congrats! Everything is now completely your problem. Hope you remembered to get everything you needed! Pro Tip: You didn't. Brace yourself. Because we love you, we're going to share the answers one Reddit user (who is a total unnamed hero for any first time home buyers) got when they asked:
The Unsung Hero Of Home Repairs[rebelmouse-image 18349358 is_animated_gif=
An item I never see listed but I use a lot. A big container of zip ties.
Money![rebelmouse-image 18348989 is_animated_gif=
Honestly about 10 thousand dollars
Because that first few months is going to be very expensive as there isn't "one" thing you need but about 200
If you lived in an apartment you might not have things like ladders, lawn mowers and such
Shockingly Useful[rebelmouse-image 18349359 is_animated_gif=
A voltage pen! Old houses can have weird wiring and sometimes you just want to know if that old plug in works. Save yourself the zap. These things are cheap and handy.
Yes, we did have a home inspection! But once the papers are signed and the warranty expires, you are on your own. And Murphy's Law dictates that is the exact time for stuff to get weird.
Projectile Puke Cleaner[rebelmouse-image 18349360 is_animated_gif=
You have 8 grand worth of carpet? Buy the $300 carpet cleaner so you dont live on a dirty rag
Everyone really needs a shop vac at some point and will be happy you own when you need it. Shop vacs should come with every baby
First time your baby projectile pukes across the whole house you will understand.
Please Have A Plunger.[rebelmouse-image 18349361 is_animated_gif=
A toilet plunger. Until you know your new homes plumbing... look out.
You Don't Think About It Until You Need It[rebelmouse-image 18349362 is_animated_gif=
A fire extinguisher.
Stud Finder[rebelmouse-image 18349365 is_animated_gif=
I was hanging something at my boyfriend's place and asked if he had a stud finder. "Well, of course, but I don't see how my mirror is gonna help right now."
But Do We Need A Tarp?[rebelmouse-image 18349366 is_animated_gif=
Got a big pile of leaves in the front that you wanna move to the back? Slide it around on a tarp.
Did your grill cover blow away in the storm last night? Cover it with a tarp.
Have a broken screen panel on your screened in porch from the same storm? Hang that tarp.
Need a drop cloth while you paint your kitchen? You get yourself a tarp.
Need to catch branches on the ground while your prune your trees? Get a bucket.
JUST KIDDING GET A TARP.
One Key To Rule Them All[rebelmouse-image 18349367 is_animated_gif=
One key. Have all your door locks set to the same key.
When my wife and I first bought our house, I told her the same thing. The first couple of days after we closed, we planned to paint and replace all the door knobs and deadbolts. The house had 3 different keys: one for the knobs, one for the deadbolts, and one for the detached garage. On the day of closing, I changed them all with matching knobs and deadbolts so they all used one key.
Come a few days after closing and we get a knock on the door. It's the previous homeowner with a box full of a few things that they didn't realize they had packed: the owner's manuals for all the appliances, a little hook tool to open and close the flue, and about a half dozen keys to the doors. As soon as they left, I turned to my wife and said "and this is why we changed the locks."
An Air What?[rebelmouse-image 18349368 is_animated_gif=
This took me 7 years to discover: An Air Comb
This thing is simply a stick with some holes drilled in it, and you attach it to an air compressor.
What would you need this for? Well, my old house was built in 1969. It had a 17 year old HVAC system, which did not perform very well. I hired 5-6 different HVAC contractors to come out and diagnose the issues, and each one told me something different. The problem was that the system could not keep up with the weather - hot days were hot inside, cold days were cold inside. We bought a window AC to help in summer, and oil filled electric radiators to help in winter.
The system ran 24x7 most days, and during the summer we were lucky to see temps in the high 70's indoors, it was more like 84 - 88 degrees. In the winter, well, we were freezing. It was like it wasn't even on.
And of course, my electric bills were expensive - $300 to $700 a month. It was killing me. None of my neighbors had bills as high as we did. All their homes were comfy, too.
Finally, by accident, I discovered the issue when I was changing my HVAC filter. There was a big piece of ... crap on the filter. It was black and made of dust and dirt. I stuck my camera into my air handler and took a picture of the A-coil (evaporator coils) and discovered they were coated almost completely with dust.
I bought the air comb, used my compressor and blew the coils clean, and suddenly it was like I had a brand new HVAC system. The house would cool down in an hour. We could set it to any temp we wanted and be comfy. Our usage dropped by well over 60%, and my electric bills dropped well over 50%.
All because of a $20 tool.
Good Guy Seller[rebelmouse-image 18349369 is_animated_gif=
When I sold my house I gave the buyer measurements of all the windows and all warranty paperwork (roof, furnace, windows etc). I also provided a list of all house quirks.
Example: our garage opener sensor was askew ever so slightly so when you pulled in on the right side spot you had to aim the opener to the left - this may sound stupid but it will save them a sh*t ton of aggravation.
Another example: we had lovebirds nest in our front hedges - they would come every year and lay eggs. When that happens they get VERY defensive of their space which made our front door pretty much unusable. We didn't mind, but they might, so we left information on who to call to relocate them (a local nature center will come and do it for free!)
We also provided our garden and plant information - we had a pretty decent garden and nice little flower arrangements. We also provided the name of our landscaper, handyman, roofer, the kid's number to call to shovel snow in the winter, plumber, furnace people, oil company we used and other oil companies in the area for bids.
i tried to provide everything I was not provided when we bought the house.
The Notebook[rebelmouse-image 18349370 is_animated_gif=
A notebook for house repairs and reno'ing. As the years go by, it can be really hard to track all the things you do, and when you did them. Was there a one year warranty on that window replacement, or two year? When did the furnace get serviced last? We're currently dealing with a huge tunneling under our yard with the City due to drain issues, and also had work done 7 years ago. Trying to remember what and where the City and plumber dug/did back then, is causing some issues now. Take notes new home owners of Reddit, lots of notes!
This Answer Became A Painting Tutorial[rebelmouse-image 18349371 is_animated_gif=
Get a decent brush, like a Corona Excalibur and learn how to cut in really well. Learning how to cut in will save your HOURS trying to tape everything perfectly. If you spill paint let it dry a couple hours before cleaning it, especially on carpets. One little dot of paint on a carpet is easy to cut off with a razor blade, a big smear of paint in the carpet is impossible to get out.
Take the time to prep the walls, skim coating with joint compound if necessary, you will see every imperfection through the paint, don't think it will cover it up. Fill holes, and prime water stains.
Paint ceilings first, then trim, then walls.
Edit: if you do decide tape is the way for you, get the green tape, not the blue tape. Paint and peel the tape right away, don't load up a lot of paint in the corner or it will drip once you peel the tape up. The green tape (Frog Tape) has a chemical reaction when paint hits the edge of it and foams up to keep paint from wicking underneath. Also, buy new tape every time you paint, don't use that roll you've had sitting around for a year..
Also, if you have wallpaper on the walls that's bubbling, do not paint over it. You need to remove it or your walls will continue to look like shit. WP Chomp is magic for that. Once the paper is off you need to clean the crap out of the walls to remove any residual glue. Then you will want to skim coat to even the walls out, then prime, then paint. This will take you a few days if not a couple weeks, do not expect to paint in an afternoon. Prep is at least 75% of the job, the painting part is the easy past...
No Pressure[rebelmouse-image 18349372 is_animated_gif=
Water-key. It's the little key you use to open the tiny manhole cover that connects your house's water to the city line. When you get that open, you can disconnect your house from water pressure. I've been able to fix a lot of things with that off.
"I Haven't Felt This Good About My Butthole..."[rebelmouse-image 18349374 is_animated_gif=
A bidet, I now think using paper is unhygienic and kinda gross. I haven't felt this good about my butthole ever. A bidet is just so good.
Stagehands Will Already Have One... Or Ten.[rebelmouse-image 18349375 is_animated_gif=
I bought a leatherman first week after buying my house. It lived at my hip and saved me many dozen trips to the toolbox for a quick adjustment or tightening of bolts or screws or cutting something. I used to think swiss army knives were the shit, but then I realized you could have one with a set of pliers built in.
We Love Lamp[rebelmouse-image 18349376 is_animated_gif=
A headlamp. Invaluable for hands free spot lighting during repairs, painting, etc. Couldn't believe how much we used it or how glad we would be to have it
Insulate Like You Mean It[rebelmouse-image 18349378 is_animated_gif=
Extra insulation. When we had our home inspected the inspector told us that the insulation we had was adequate, but in a few years new regulation would require more if we wanted to sell the house. I contacted a company that would blow in insulation on top of what we already had. When he asked how much I wanted to put, I said put as much as will fit.
It ended up costing us more than $800 but since we live in the deep south, I thought this was a good investment.
Years later we had to replace our air conditioner. When the employee asked how much we pay for electricity for the hottest part of the year, I said conservatively about $100 a month. He looked at me in shock and said a house this size should run $200 to $300 during those months. He didn't really believe me until he went into the attic. He said he has never seen so much insulation in a house before.
That investment paid for itself in the first couple of years.
"... And Both Of My Stupid F*cking Cats."[rebelmouse-image 18349379 is_animated_gif=
Sticky traps for insects. When I first moved in I found an old sticky trap behind the washer. It was a bit dusty so I threw it out. A month or so later I started seeing spiders everywhere in the house. It was so bad that I would update my weekly spider count on a dry erase board. Finally I bought a shit ton of sticky traps and out them all over the floor in the laundry room. To date I've caught numerous spiders, a couple flies, and both of my stupid f*cking cats.
Think Of The Beers![rebelmouse-image 18349380 is_animated_gif=
Best thing I've had while being a homeowner is an extra fridge in the garage. Expanded cold storage is extremely useful. Beer, bottled water, frozen meat, extra ice, etc.
Wise people tend to glorify the past for good reason. Simpler times seemed to indicate just that. Less life drama.
While many technical advances have also made our current life easier, it certainly has come with its share of complications that never existed prior to another time.
Curious to hear from strangers online, one Redditor asked:
"What was actually better in the past?"
People found traveling, particularly flying, was less dramatic back in the day.
"This is true. We used to go to the airport to go to the cafe within the airport, watch the planes take off, people watch."
Comfort In The Skies
"Flying in general."
"More seat space, meals included (and a choice of meals), actual metal utensils, luggage included, no need to get to the airport 2 hours before your flight..."
A Proper Send-Off
"And you could say goodbye to your friends at the gate. Get there early before the flight and grab a leisurely meal with them. Man, airports used to be fun."
"In the 90s airport security took half as long."
Many Redditors believe living in the present is a huge economical inconvenience.
"Prices vs earnings."
"Psh. Try childcare. Our childcare cost for two children is more than our mortgage. When I was the same age, it cost my parents about $50/week. Today that would be roughly $135/week per kid. We’re paying $500/wk and still don’t have full time care for both kids. Sh*t’s crazy."
Criminals seemed to have a field day once upon a time.
"Being a criminal. If there was a security camera, it was too low resolution to make your face very identifiable."
"also DNA analysis and fingerprinting wasn't as good, no Internet to track you."
Leaving The Country Undetected
"It used to be that it was possible for someone to commit a serious crime, move across the country, and never be caught. As communications technology has improved, that’s no longer feasible."
How people occupied their time in the past seemed to be more favorable.
The Life-Line Device
"Smart phones too, Reddit is the only social media I use and still I stare at this f'king thing 5 hours a day. I know I’m addicted to it and I’d love to punt it but unfortunately it’s also my phone, my map, my camera, my tape measure, my dictaphone, my Walkman etc. etc."
The sentiment that the past was better stems largely from nostalgia.
Aside from accessing our Gameboys and Tamagochis, my friends and I would ride our bikes or skateboard out in the cul-de-sac.
We would scrape our knees from falling, get knocked to the ground playing freeze tag, and come home with dried mud on our clothes from a day of roughhousing.
It was some of the best times of my childhood, and I feel for today's youth who still have the option of playing outside but choose to live on their iPads and iPhones instead.
They don't know what they're missing, TBH. Maybe it's just me.
Having a dope supportive partner is seriously a game changer, fam.
I'm not suggesting that a person can't achieve success without a relationship. Not at all. What I'm saying, is if you're going to choose to do a team project, it helps when your teammate doesn't suck.
But a moment of honesty - a lot of us have no idea what an amazing partner looks like. If relationships of obligation or convenience, are all you've ever seen, then how could you?
Amazing doesn't look like that at all.
Reddit user Sylva_Glow asked:
"People with an amazing partner, what makes them so amazing?"
Here's what people had to say.
"She is self aware."
"Says things like, 'I may have been being selfish', 'You have a good point', and 'I’m sorry'. I do the same and try to admit my faults, and stop on a dime in an argument and say 'I’m sorry, I’m being unreasonable, let’s back up'. "
"In essence we both are pretty good at admitting and accepting each other’s and our own frailties. It’s rare to be with a partner like that."
"Also, she has a hilarious laugh and sense of humor, and though she doesn’t feel so, she’s hilarious."
"This is huge, same with my wife an I. We can argue about a subject and politely disagree, but we both take turns listening to each other's opinions and 9/10 we both start cracking jokes."
"This is so vital. I'm so glad you found someone who does this with you."
Together CrankinessParks And Recreation Time GIFGiphy
"When we're both cranky for silly or small reasons, but we're cranky together, not at each other."
"It reminds me we're always partners, never adversaries."
"How do you achieve this together-crankiness? Sounds way better than being cranky at each other."
"I’m not the person you asked, and it certainly doesn’t work automatically with everyone, but in a relationship, every issue can be an 'us' issue. Even if it’s leaving the toilet seat up."
"If you have a complaint about your partner, think of it more as a discomfort you’re feeling that they can help you with, and approach it as a problem you can both solve together."
"Have an open and honest discussion about the disconnect and what you bring to the table that is causing the tension as well as what you could bring to help. Therapists often actually suggest visualizing it as sitting side by side at a table, looking at the problem on the table together."
"In hindsight I kinda talked about conflict resolution instead of 'together-crankiness' but it’s kind of the same thing."
"We’re all just doing the best we can with what we’ve got. If you’re cranky about something, let your partner in. Give them a seat on your side of the table and tell them that you’re cranky, why, and whether or not they can help and how."
"The best part about a loving relationship is feeling like you’re teamed up with someone against the world."
"Simple: because no matter what, I never doubt in my mind that he loves me more than anything."
"I never worry about him leaving/cheating on me. I can be my complete, authentic self around him. Even when we fight, I know it's just a temporary tiff that we'll talk about later when we've cooled down."
"But, most of all, I know that whatever he's doing or wherever he is, he'll always stop it to drive however far to come help me if I'm in a bad situation/mood."
"Not many people have a partner like that, so I'm sincerely grateful that I lucked out in finding mine 😇❤"
"This is really cute, happy for you :)"
"Yay! This is me and my partner too! I love to hear when people have found 'their person' too. Everyone should feel as cozy and loved by their partner as we do!"
"My husband is genuinely interested in everything I do, no matter how mundane it is."
"When I dragged him to 3 different stores to find a specific mascara, he asks about what makes it so great & then will geek out & read up about cosmetic formulations."
"When I told him a certain lip patch helped heal my cracked nipples from breastfeeding, he started reading up over other potential breastfeeding injuries & how people handle them."
"He doesn’t do it to lord his 'expertise' over me or anything, he’s genuinely excited to just ask me about everything."
"Oh & he started giving me daily massages when I was pregnant & I still get them now. Our daughter is 3."
Perfect MatchChefs Kiss Reaction GIF by Nick JonasGiphy
"The way he still looks at me."
"When I get out of the shower and there's lunch waiting for me."
"How some nights he wakes up in the middle of the night and pulls me closer to him because I've moved too far away or even when he pulls me closer in all situations."
"How he lays in bed with me every morning even though he'd rather go sit on the couch and wake up."
"The sacrifices he makes for me everyday."
"That he tries his best to make sure I am smiling. He's always there when I need him no matter the time or place. There are so many things that he does every day to let me know he loves me."
"Ah. He is just..a perfect match for me. We have our rough times and we get frustrated with each other, but he always treats me with kindness, respect, and love no matter what mood he is in."
"We always make sure to communicate our problems and at the end of most days we go to bed with a smile on our faces."
Charming Little Things
"Omg, I have a list of notes as to reasons why I love my boyfriend all saved up in my phone. Someday I'm going to gift them to him somehow."
"While the big things matter very much, like how our whole relationship he has helped and stuck by me thru a disability, it's also all the little things that matter every day."
"He prefers Onion Rings over French Fries. However, when we go out to eat together, he will pick fries as a side with his meal so he can share them with me since I don't like onion rings."
"In the mornings, he will block my hand with his so the dog can't lick my hand and wake me up."
"He sees when my phone charge is low and will bring me a charger even when I didn't realize it."
"Whenever he has the cheese out, he sets aside a slice for me."
"When he gets out of bed, he turns his pillow towards me knowing I'm going to steal it."
"If I pour myself more milk then I can finish, he drinks the rest so I don't feel bad about wasting it."
"I couldn't go out in the snow once, so he went out and drew hearts in the snow that I could see from the window."
"He'll sing songs to the pets, dance around the kitchen, squeak when he laughs, use the oven mitt like a dinosaur, and say "aww" while playing Animal Crossing."
"He sends me memes, and twirls the same piece of hair in the front of his head when he's distracted."
"He's amazing! I'm charmed by him every single day!"
Name That Tune
"I randomly whistle a 4-6 note tune while doing tasks."
"And lately she's been guessing them with about 60-70% success rate. It's cute when she tries hard and she lights up with this glow when she gets it right."
"No one gets me but her."
"Married in our teens and about to celebrate our 14 yr anniversary."
Meow90 Day Fiance Flirt GIF by TLC EuropeGiphy
"Accepting me for every. single. quirk."
"I was pretty pessimistic about relationships when we went on our first date so I am lucky that I have never faked one situation or personality or even had to present 'my best self.' "
"Small example - I had an ex that I thought was perfect for me. I'm a f*cking weirdo so once I meowed at him. He told me not to do that."
"I meow at my now fiancé and he meows right back."
"F*ck your ex. I can tell what my wife wants from the type and tone of her meows. My wife is very much human and yes, we are both weird."
"And yes, I do meow right back to her as well."
"Meowed at my partner today and he booped me. That’s when you know it’s real"
Her Brilliant Mind
"When I met her 30 years ago there was fierce physical attraction between both of us, but what won me over was her brilliant mind. She is the smartest person I have ever met."
"Quick witted, a great conversationalist, and turned out to be the best mother to our daughter that I could have ever asked for. She is very loving and caring and puts family before almost everything."
"Two years ago I lost my father to the delta variant of Covid-19. It was the worst experience of my life. I don't know what I would have done with her strength and support. I didn't think I would make it through the funeral, but having someone you trust completely walking with you step by step makes a huge difference."
"I hope you all have a partner as good as mine to share your lives with."
Just Do It
"My wife is just a go getter."
"She wanted to learn carpentry, so she did."
"Wanted a better job and she got it."
"When she wants to achieve something she just does."
"Mine rolled her eyes at me for wanting a macramé owl. I don't know why I wanted one, but I always did."
"Some people think they're tacky, and maybe they are."
"She's from a country that didn't have them. She never understood why I wanted one."
"Last year, in secret, she watched a bunch of YouTube videos, taught herself how to make a macramé owl and then made me one for our house and we put it up by the front door."
Well that was all painfully adorable.
What about you, dear readers? Do you have incredible amazing partners who show you how dope partnership can be?
Tell us about them!
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Have you ever gotten ready to do something that you think will only take a minute or two, but end up taking a lot longer?
Like when you try to print a paper at the library before class, only to find out several other students had the same idea. Or when you decide you can finish the Powerpoint for your work presentation during your lunch break, only to realize it needs to be way more in-depth than you first thought.
Chances are, you've been in this situation before. I certainly have! I can't even count the number of times I have given myself two minutes to microwave a meal only to realize my roommate needs it too (and got to it first) and I don't actually have the meal I planned to eat, meaning I need to spend some time figuring out what to eat instead.
Redditor hungrytiredandbored was curious about what other things take longer than they should, and asked:
"What always takes way longer than it should?"
As If Standing In Line Isn't Annoying Enough
"People buying lottery tickets ahead of you in line at the convenience store/gas station. 'What's number 5? Hmm... what's number 8? Okay, I'll take a number 13, and straight box on the daily 4.'
"They should have a separate line for that. It's so damn annoying."
Worst Printed Ever
"Printing a document on an HP printer."
"oh you'd like to print a document? You have to create an account with HP. Now let me tell you about our subscriptions services."
"HP. I don't want to create an account. Just make my printer work with my laptop and phone. This is why nobody over 40 owns a printer anymore. You make trash products, HP."
It's Not That Hard!
"Doing anything at the counter of the post office. I have no clue what takes everyone in front of me so...long..."
"Love when you go there to drop off one (1) pre-labelled package and the dude in front of you has never mailed a damn letter before and won't listen when the clerk tries to explain it to him. I hope they introduce self-service machines here at some point so I can just skip the entire thing."
Chew, Chew, Chew, Swallow
"My kids eating dinner. Just F**KING EAT IT."
– User deleted
"My 2 year old, an hour before dinner: I'M HUNGRY, I WANT SNACKS! SNAAAAAACK!"
"My 2 year old, with dinner on the table: I'M NOT HUNGRY / I DON'T WANT IT! GIMMIE PB&J!"
"My 2 year old, when it's time for bed: BUT I GOTTA EEEEEEAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTT!!!"
Not So Fast Food
"The fast food order of the car in front of me. This menu hasn’t changed in years - what could you possibly be talking about? Do you know the person taking orders? Is this a personal conversation? Did you not know what you wanted to eat before pulling into the line?"
The Longest Line On Earth
"The DMV. I'm 37 years old and somehow I STILL haven't learned it's never a quick in and out."
"Im 26 and have been on line for 32 years"
"Standing at the door waving your in-laws goodbye"
"My family will be like, "Ok well we should probably go" then immediately stand up, gather their sh*t, thank us for having them over, and leave."
"My in-laws say they should probably leave soon, start a conversation about something, ask if I can take a look at a laptop that isn't working, etc - 45 minutes later their putting their shoes on to go."
"Like, if you're going to stay - then stay, that's totally fine. But I hate waiting in limbo to see if they are going or not. It's unsettling."
No Such Thing As A Quick Meal
"Meal prep. I often underestimate how long will take to make dinner by 50+%."
"I came here to say this. Recipe says prep will take 15 minutes, actually takes 45. 30-minute meal? Definitely over an hour."
Just Need A Bit Of Cash
"People at ATM booths"
"Yup. If you're in a hurry and just need to take out a twenty guarunteed the person in front of you is a 70 year old who is apparently using the ATM to put a second mortgage on their house"
Get Me Out Of Here!
"Getting away from an unwanted conversation."
"I've Uh'huh'd 5 times and am looking at the door. Take the hint."
Life is a journey, and slow and steady wins the race. Of course, all the clichés in the world don't change the fact that some things should go quickly but don't.
You can't always make things move faster, but you can control how you react to the low speed. If we learn how to cope, we may just find a little more zen.
It's a fact of life that people can be brutal. Whether it's because a person is downright cruel or because he or she is drunk or angry, they can say some awful things.
My Indian aunt once mistakenly thought a cousin of mine was my daughter and told me American teenagers were trashy and stupid. I don't talk to that aunt anymore...
There is never an excuse to be that cruel, but that doesn't stop people from behaving that way.
Curious about this, Redditor Brilliant-End9428 asked:
"What is the most f*cked up thing someone said to you?"
No Excuse For Cruelty
"Mum's (59) boyfriend got mega drunk a few weeks back, told her that he was "only with her because he pitied her""
"Drunk or not, she wasn't having that. Back to being single."
Worst SIL Ever
"My sister-in-law was joking about how there aren't any male children that will "carry on the family name" when she knows full well that I lost my son at birth."
Wrong Reason To Have A Child
""You were our last attempt to save the marriage""
"Thanks, mom. Glad to know I was a failure straight out of the gate."
""You're too ugly to buy ice cream from." - Some b**ch to me @ 15"
Undeserving Of Being A Father
"When I was 11 my father (who I hadn't seen in 5 years b/c of divorce) showed up at a family Christmas and calmly asked me to not call him 'dad' b/c his new kids didn't know I existed."
Grandmas Shouldn't Have Favorites
"I was 7 or 8 and I told my grandmother I wanted to be a doctor when I grew up. She told me I would never be smart enough and that I'd be lucky to one day be my cousin's house cleaner."
"My cousin was her favorite grandchild."
"I'm 32 and I still remember it so vividly."
"I hope you realize I'm only using you for your money"
No Good Reason For Saying This
"My grandmother and grandfather told 7yr old me if my mom kills herself and my dad dies in Afghanistan they would rather see me rot on the streets than taking me in"
That's Not How It Works
"Just dont be depressed. Like bro..."
No matter who it was that said something that cruel to you, know that you deserve better (and that it might be time to cut someone out of your life).