Phones are a blessing and a curse. Sure, the world is at our fingertips—but they can also get us into a lot of trouble. Take, for example, these phone moments gone horribly wrong. From disturbing, creepy calls to notifications that revealed dark secrets, these stories are enough to make us want to drop our phones in the toilet and then leave 'em there.
1. Machine Reading
man driving carPhoto by Hareez Hussaini on UnsplashI was riding in the car with a co-worker when my wife texted. I told Siri to read it. Huge mistake. My wife texted to yell at me about leaving dingleberries in the shower drain.
2. Beyond The Gyno Veil
woman holding phonePhoto by Daria Nepriakhina 🇺🇦 on UnsplashOh boy. This was the most harrowing thing I've been through. This was how I found out a girl I was dating had end-stage terminal cancer. She was on the phone with me as she walked into her “gynecology appointment”, then proceeded to put her phone in her purse, but I think she mis-tapped or something.
I listened to a 30-minute conversation that was to the effect of: “You have four months to live. There are no treatment options”. She'd been aware of it for three years but refused treatment because essential oils can cure any malady, am I right???
3. Thin Wall, Huge Separation
woman using laptop while sitting on chairPhoto by Brooke Cagle on UnsplashMy fiancée at the time—three months from the wedding—used to use my laptop all the time for social media and stuff while she was watching TV. She comes to me one night and says she thinks stuff isn't working out and that we should talk about whether we should really continue. I'd not felt any problems that I didn't just dismiss as wedding planning/financial stress. So I explained that and she said she wanted to sleep in the spare room that night to think things through, to which I agreed.
I wasn't very happy with it at all, so I decided to go get my device and watch some YouTube before bed. She had her Facebook left open on my user account—completely normal. Then I see a notification from her ex-colleague.
She was live-sexting him with just a thin wall between us. I instantly knew I'd never forgive that, got dressed, quietly snuck away into my car and drove to my mum’s. She didn't even realize I knew for days. Didn't speak to her at all after that. All communication was through her own parents, who were devastated.
4. In What Reality
woman in brown shirt covering her facePhoto by Fa Barboza on UnsplashMy boyfriend left his phone on the sofa while he excused himself to use the restroom. A text popped up, and I automatically looked. We had great respect for each other’s privacy, so, of course, I didn’t read it, but I did see the name. He came out of the bathroom, and I asked who “Jane” was. He had never mentioned her.
“My niece,” he answered. He came from a large family, and I couldn’t keep track of all of his nieces and nephews. We went back to the movie we were watching, and I never thought of it again. We had a wonderful relationship. The kind of love that’s made up to sell books and films. It was the most real thing in my life.
I had been twice divorced, and it was only with him that I learned what real love is. My own parents really didn’t love me. I wasn’t just happy with my life; I was ecstatic. Nothing else mattered because I was loved. It was five years of absolute bliss. I agreed to work late one day and was texting him during my break.
He told me our plans for the night, which were going to dinner with his best friend. He said he would tell him we’d be a bit late. I had to go back to work. I got home that night to find the best human being I had ever known was gone forever after trying to get into the shower. It was a massive heart attack, they said.
The only thing I remember is screaming and crying. It couldn’t end this way. He was far too young and healthy. It’s been almost two years later, and I am still in shock. Two days after he was gone, I got a message from “Jane.” Jane was the woman in his other life, as in he had two lives—another home, another woman, etc.
I still don’t understand how this was possible, but she had definite proof. Proof that she shoved in my face. She didn’t know about me either, so I felt bad for her. She was everything he couldn’t stand. I’ll never get over this. I’m just an empty shell now. I quickly stopped messaging with Jane as I could not take it.
All I remember about his infidelity is that text message. He’d never lied to me, so why wouldn’t I believe him? Now, I have no idea what was a lie and what was the truth. I thought losing him was as bad as it could get. Boy, was I wrong! What he did doesn’t make me love him any less even though sometimes I wish it did.
5. Earth To Dad
white, red, and black Jyoti Travels bus passing the streetPhoto by Indrajeet Choudhary on UnsplashOne time, back when my dad used to be a coach bus driver, he left his phone on after calling my sister. It was in his pocket while he was still on the job. The radio was on inside the bus and my sister, who was still listening on the other end of the call, could hear that it was playing our local station.
My dad often listened to this station and phoned in for quizzes and anecdotes. Then my dad heard something super strange. My sister had called up the station and managed to get the radio host to make a live air announcement to tell my dad to turn off his phone.
6. Over-Staying Their Welcome?
man and woman sitting on bench facing seaPhoto by Matt Bennett on UnsplashMy in-laws are EXTREMELY religious, and we just got them their first iPhone—the first smartphone they’ve ever had. In the middle of me showing her parents how WeatherBug works—we were outside, wife was not—she texted me a spread-eagle shot of herself from the bedroom with the words "I can’t wait for them to leave so I can literally go to town on you in bed". Let’s just say things got very awkward.
It may have been small as heck on the banner, but they were both wearing their glasses and paying very close attention. Nevertheless, not a single word was said about it and they left 15 minutes later.
7. Demon Slayer
white ceramic toilet bowl with coverPhoto by Giorgio Trovato on UnsplashI'm a dispatcher. got a call from a gentleman reporting an issue with his toilet. For whatever reason, it was a bit hard for me to understand exactly what the problem was, except that it definitely involved his toilet. After a little while, I determined to the best of my ability that the toilet was overflowing and he didn't know what to do.
Although plumbing issues are absolutely not an appropriate reason for calling an emergency number, it wasn't unheard of. To a certain extent, I can understand the thought process and people have certainly called it for less. After a bit more talking, however, I realized that he had not called about a plumbing issue. It wasn't water that was coming out of his toilet, but demons.
The demons were spilling out of his toilet and he needed help. I put in a complaint for law enforcement and kept him on the phone. It was a busy evening and the officers wouldn't be able to get to him for a few minutes, so I asked if he could close the toilet lid. He said he could and he did. I asked him if this stopped the demons from coming out of his toilet and he told me it did. This made him calmer and I was able to release the call.
8. Missing No Detail
a woman with a surprised look on her facePhoto by engin akyurt on UnsplashI was heading to my school’s office of career services to have my resume reviewed. I got a couple of texts from a guy vividly describing what he wanted to do with me, but I didn’t open my messages since I was thinking about the meeting. I used my laptop to show my resume. The career services woman started reading it over.
She was giving me some feedback, and the notifications I didn’t clear on my phone from the texts all popped up on my screen. The notifications were there for a couple of seconds and she definitely saw them. As my face burned and I turned bright red, she just primly said, “Now those aren’t the “skills” we’d list on your resume, now are they?” Not only was I mortified, but this middle-aged lady also had to go and roast me too. It was the most excruciating hour of my life.
9. Time Is Money
orange and white medication pillPhoto by Christina Victoria Craft on UnsplashA patient called and left a voicemail for a refill on his prescription. He thought he hung up, but he didn’t. Instead, he proceeded to negotiate a price with someone for the refill he had just requested.
10. Woman Overboard
black ip desk phone on black wooden tablePhoto by Julian Hochgesang on UnsplashA colleague of mine dialed into a meeting of two or three managers plus about 25 sales representatives, only for everyone to suddenly go quiet. One person told him the meeting was canceled and he could drop the call, as they were just chatting about sales stuff. He pretended to hang up and stayed on the line. That's how he found out the truth.
They were basically planning a mutiny because they didn't like that their regional manager was a woman. They had a whole strategy for how they were going to cause a massive screw-up that would cost the company a ton of money and make it look like it was her fault so that she would get fired. The idiots even did a little "are we all in agreement" roll call at the end.
We worked in a call center, so his end of the call was recorded. Within a week, every last one of them was fired and within a month they were replaced.
11. Cheating Thievery
100 us dollar billPhoto by Nathan Dumlao on UnsplashI was borrowing my boyfriend's computer to send him some pictures from his computer to his phone. In the upper corner, it was non-stop messaging from girls. I clicked on one, and she sent pictures. I found out he was sending money to women. My money. Several hundred dollars.
12. Honesty Is The Best Policy
man holding telephone screamingPhoto by Icons8 Team on UnsplashI once worked as a secretary in an office that for some reason got pocket-dialed a lot. During one such occasion, I got to listen in while some gentleman from New York absolutely roasted one of his employees. The employee said, “Well what the heck do you expect me to do"? The boss's response was legendary. "Honestly, Tom, honestly, if it wasn't for the fact that I'm sleeping with your sister, you would be out of here right now”.
13. I Hope You Were Taking Notes
turned on LED projector on tablePhoto by Alex Litvin on UnsplashIt wasn't me, but my professor used to have his laptop hooked up to the projector up in front of the class. While he was going through a presentation one day, a text popped up on his screen from a woman and all it said was "I have herpes.” He stopped connecting his laptop to the projector after that.
14. Surprise Features
yellow Volkswagen carPhoto by Rahul Bhogal on UnsplashI moved to Japan a few years ago, and early one day, I was at a market and saw a tanuki statue with its junk on display. I took a picture and thought it’d be funny to send my brother a message reading "UNSOLICITED DICK PIC!" then send it. Halfway around the world, my brother was doing some late evening car shopping.
He’d recently been in an accident and totaled his car so was in the market for a new one. He’d handed the salesman his phone so he could see pictures of the damage, and the guy was looking through them when the words "UNSOLICITED DICK PIC!" showed on the screen. The guy nearly dropped the phone trying to shove it back.
15. Think Of The Children
woman in white button up shirt leaning on blue wallPhoto by Nivedita Singh on UnsplashI once went to a friend's house to borrow her phallus-shaped cake pans for a bachelorette party. We sat there for a few minutes talking about them. She had two different sized pans, so there were some jokes told…then I noticed the most mortifying thing. I was sitting on my phone and had pocket-dialed the Child Welfare Provincial Emergency line.
It was on speed dial because I worked for a Children’s Aid Society at the time. It was so awkward.
16. Bad Timing
a man is holding his head with his handsPhoto by Bansah Photography on UnsplashMy best friend in high school was in the process of being grounded and having his phone taken away, and as he was handing over his phone to his mom he got a text from me that said "Hey, I found your mom's bedroom toy" accompanied with a picture of a medieval battering ram. He told me that they both saw it right as the transaction was taking place, then held each other’s gaze silently for what he described as an eternity.
17. Learning Bad News
girl sitting on chairPhoto by Patricia Prudente on UnsplashOne day in high school, my history teacher brought her 4-year-old daughter on one of the last days of school when we were doing practically nothing. The teacher handed her daughter her iPad so she could play, and a few other students and I were talking to and playing with the daughter and showing her games on the iPad.
My teacher must have had her iMessage set up on the iPad and forgot because it kept getting texts from her husband such as, "She's just a friend," and, "Well maybe we need to finally go through with it and end this once and for all." I had to turn on do not disturb.
18. Troubleshooting
man using IP phone inside roomPhoto by Berkeley Communications on UnsplashI work with a guy who used to work at an IT helpdesk. He made a habit of muting himself and very aggressively cussing out whoever it was he was on the phone with, then unmuting himself and acting as if nothing happened. I knew at some point he was going to miss that mute button. One day I’m on a conference call with him, another company, and another individual at the director level within our company for some troubleshooting.
After a bit, we decided to call it a day and reconvene in the morning. Suddenly, we heard him unleash a string of loud expletives followed by silence. The director said, “Excuse me”? After a brief second he dropped off the call and we apologized on his behalf. But it didn't end there. He came in the next morning with an immaculate story about how he spilled hot coffee on his leg and had to drop his pants outside his car.
He showed everybody in the office this massive burn mark on his leg. The interesting thing is that he had been on this call with us for about four hours, away from his home, and in his car this whole time with no access to a fresh pot of coffee. If there was coffee in his possession, it was very likely cold by this point. My guess is he realized he had messed up, so he went home and staged an injury to avoid persecution, but we’ll never know.
19. The Elephant In The Room
gray elephants performing on circusPhoto by Becky Phan on UnsplashAn old woman called, extremely confused, because she said that there was an elephant in her back garden. I question her but she is insistent that there is a fully grown elephant in her garden. She’s frightened—probably because she thinks there is a giant elephant in her back garden. The immediate assumption is that this woman may have dementia.
An officer is sent to do a welfare check on the poor woman. When he got to her house, she let him inside and took him through to the kitchen to look out into her garden and, yep, there was an elephant, and it was eating her plants. The officer called for backup. Turns out there was a circus relatively nearby and the elephant had escaped overnight.
20. Just Like The French
mcdonalds fries in red mcdonalds fries cupPhoto by Mak on UnsplashI had this roommate in my sophomore year of college, and we had a very weird, close personal relationship. I was in my Spanish professor’s office hours, and she was waiting for me at the cafeteria to have lunch together. Just before going in, I texted her and asked her to get me some fries, and then I turned off my phone.
I was showing my professor my paper on my laptop forgetting that I had iMessage on my laptop. A message from her came in, and I’ll never forget the look on his face: “I’ll get you fries but only if you sensually feed them to me while you call me daddy,” That was my last time visiting his office hours!
21. Of Angels and Demons
woman's facePhoto by Danie Franco on UnsplashI had a job where I was in the position to write-off a substantial phone bill because the customer said her mother was dying overseas. She said her mother had dementia and needed to hear things in her daughter’s voice to believe anything, including the doctor’s instructions. She was heartbroken and sobbing about how if she had the kind of money to pay this phone bill, then she would have just gone back to her country because the flight would have cost less.
She was right about that. I wrote off the entirety of the phone bill. She cried like a jilted lover in a rom-com and went on and on about how people like me are angels sent from heaven. After we were done I wished her a good evening and she obviously thought the call had ended. She turned to someone and said in a perfectly normal voice, “Well, that worked”!
22. So That’s What You Really Think Of Me, Huh?
white and blue yacht on sea under blue sky during daytimePhoto by Alina Kacharho on UnsplashI was with a group of friends and this person gave me their number. I often save people's names with a detail that reminds me of who they are—such as James From Chicago, for example. So this person was talking nonstop about their yacht when I met them. So I wrote something like "Gary Hasayacht" as their name in my contacts. Anyway, he sent me a text but it didn't go to my phone for a while because we had a bad signal. Then it popped up when my phone was in clear view right in front of me.
He sees the text, and his name as it's listed on my phone, and then goes “You know, it's really not that big of a yacht”...I wanted to sink into the floor, he definitely thought I was hitting on him and/or a gold digger.
23. Guest Again
woman in black and white long sleeve shirt sitting beside man in white dress shirtPhoto by Sebastian Coman Photography on UnsplashMy sister-in-law was staying with me for a week, which I didn’t really want. My sister knew about it and messaged me, “How are you dealing with (her name)? Do you need to pretend to have a nap again lol?” My sister-in-law was using my tablet at that time and saw the notification pop up. She hasn’t stayed with us since.
24. Silent As A Fish
boy in gray shirt using black laptop computerPhoto by Thomas Park on UnsplashMy daughter's school had an author come on a Zoom call to do a reading of a book called The Pout-Pout Fish. The school wanted to get the kids in on the reading, so the teachers set it up so that the kids would join in towards the end. They rehearsed it as such: “Okay, everyone, on the count of three, we'll say ‘blub blub blub’” and proceeded to read the book.
When they got to the part where they wanted the kids to join in it went something like this: “Okay, everyone, on the count of three. One...two..." and whoever was in charge of the meeting unmuted 300 children at once at the count of two. It was chaos. Imagine 300 children screaming “BAAAAHHHAAA BLUUUUBB AAAAAAAAHHHHHH SKKKKRREEEEEE FFFIIIISSSHHHHHH BBLLLUUUUUUBBBB” until they immediately muted everyone again.
25. Perfect Date
people inside building sitting and eatingPhoto by Eric Tompkins on UnsplashOne day, I met a guy from Tinder in a pub for our first date. Things were going well. We were having a laugh and flirting. After about an hour, I took out my phone to show him a funny meme and up popped a notification from my new period tracking app saying, "Today's the day! You're ovulating!" I swiped it away quickly.
I don’t think he got a good look at it, but I was still worried he'd think I was some child-obsessed weirdo who timed my dates so random Tinder guys could impregnate me. I turned off ovulation notifications after that.
26. Kiss And Tell
a close up of a magazine on a tablePhoto by Doyoun Seo on UnsplashI accidentally pocket-dialed someone and left about a two-and-a-half-minute voicemail of my son and me badly singing “Kiss” by Prince. But I had made an even more fatal error. See, the person I called was a DJ, who then turned it into a five-minute song mix. It was given to someone I worked with and eventually it made the rounds.
27. A Bit Of A Mess
dog's facePhoto by Milli on UnsplashA Hangouts notification popped up on the screen while the new boss was standing behind me to train me on a new program. The message from my husband asked, "How's the Pooper?" I was so focused on the task that she saw it before me. I only noticed when she collapsed to the floor uncontrollably laughing. I read it and immediately lost it too.
In tears from laughing, we were frantically talking over each other. She was trying to apologize for the unprofessional reaction, and I was trying to explain that Pooper was our dog's nickname because he was getting over a bout of diarrhea! The rest of the office was so confused!
28. Fluent Sarcasm
silver iMac with keyboard and trackpad inside roomPhoto by Carl Heyerdahl on UnsplashA couple of decades ago I was at a meeting with a few BizDev guys from a Japanese company we collaborated with. At the end of one of the design sessions, one of them said something to the others in Japanese and one of our artists who looked the part of a large, late-90s rapper responded in fluent Japanese. The meeting stopped, they stared, then asked for a few minutes alone.
Apparently, the exchange was: "I hate working with these guys, why do we continue this"? Trev, the rapper, said, "Of course you do. I mean, just look at us" or something to that effect. Ahh, memories.
29. Generational Problems
woman in white top wearing eyeglassesPhoto by RepentAnd SeekChristJesus on UnsplashI was showing my grandma pictures. She chuckled and quickly gave me back the phone. I saw that my husband had texted me, and my stomach dropped: It said, "I hate it when I'm pooping and my junk touches the water. Big junk problems." We laughed, but my husband is still horrified by the thought of my grandma knowing about his "big junk problems."
30. How To Lose 150 Pounds In One Day
a man holding his stomach with his handsPhoto by Towfiqu barbhuiya on UnsplashIn the early days of Facebook, my former father-in-law was just starting to discover it and connect with old friends. He was having fun seeing who gained weight, who got divorced, who’s a millionaire now, and so on. One guy he connected with gave him his phone number, so my father-in-law called him. The guy didn’t answer, so he left a message.
He said something like, “Hey Bill, it’s been a while. Just wanted to catch up. Give me a call back”, then he hit the end button and jokingly adds, “and I heard you got fat”! He looked down and to his horror the call was still active and recording the message. It probably sounded like, “….and I heard you got fat!….oh no! Oh my God, it didn’t hang up. Oh no, it’s still recor….click”.
To my knowledge, Bill never returned that call.
31. Want You Back
person in white long sleeve shirt holding black smartphonePhoto by Kelli McClintock on UnsplashA notification from a story app I play popped up while my boyfriend was holding my phone and said something like, "Mike misses you! Come back and play!" or something like that. Of course, all he did was pull the drop-down menu down to see the full notification and laugh. He teased me about it for hours.
32. Budding Bromance
red chevrolet crew cab pickup truckPhoto by Mary B on UnsplashA few years ago a guy was on the phone with my boss while we were in his work truck. He had the speakers on and I could hear everything. The guy goes to sign off and out of habit from talking to his kids he said, “Okay, love you. Bye”. But this is what made the moment perfect: My boss didn’t skip a beat and replied, “Love you, too, brother. Bye”.
33. Get The Picture
people standing in front of white wallPhoto by Jimmy Jin on UnsplashI was working at an Apple store as a Genius and was helping an older woman with her phone. This woman had to be in her late 60s early 70s, as sweet as could be, and was having some minor problems with her phone. So, she handed me her phone and just as she did, a message popped up with a picture of a toilet full of poo.
The message read, “How many times do I have to tell you to flush the stupid toilet?!” Not knowing really sure what to do, I gave it back and told her she had a message. She took the phone, half smiled, closed the message, and handed it back telling me, “Sorry about that, sweetheart, my daughter can be a bit of a jerk.”
34. Karen Mode Enabled
red and white leather padded chairPhoto by Sam Moghadam Khamseh on UnsplashI once got a call from one of my three least favorite patients at a dental office. Her tone was always accusatory, even when she was calling to ask if we were open that day. After we hung up, I saw her call again on the caller ID.
I couldn’t pick up because I was now talking to another patient in person. Then I noticed line one (her line) is on for a long time…like she’s leaving a...five-minute message? I check my voicemail and indeed, I have a long message of her walking around a grocery store with her daughter.
She had pocket-dialed me. I listened to the whole thing. She was trash-talking our office, but the thing is she kept outlining how we went above and beyond: “Oh, they think the problem is resolved just because they called me back three times and I didn’t answer after I didn’t text them back”.
It was clear we were giving a ton of effort to this patient and she was unhappy anyway. She thought it made us look bad. About a year, later she finally transferred to another dentist. They asked for records and I sent X-rays and such. Eventually, she filed a complaint against that dentist.
I don’t know why. Anyway, we were asked to provide our records to the state board. When that happens you dig up everything you possibly can or it can look like you’re hiding something. I knew just what to do. Luckily, I had saved that voicemail, included it in an mp3, and sent it down on a thumb drive with everything else.
I don’t know if they even listened to this woman needlessly complaining about excellent service, but I do know her complaint was dropped by the state board.
35. Please Don’t Fill ‘Er Up
person crying beside bedPhoto by Claudia Wolff on UnsplashI had a lady call who was sobbing so hard I could barely understand her. I determined it wasn't a medical issue, but she wasn't making much sense through the sobbing. I finally got her to calm down a little so that she could relay what the issue was. She said that she was at a full-serve gas station (I didn't even know those existed anymore).
She told me that the attendant had pumped too much gas into her car, but she had only asked for $20 and they had filled her tank. Then she broke down sobbing again. I asked her if the attendant was being rude or if they were threatening her (because I still couldn't figure out what the crying was all about). She said, "No, the attendant apologized and they gave me a receipt for the gas."
“OK,” I said, “Then what is the issue?” She burst into tears again and said that she was afraid they would chase her down if she tried to leave and say that she had stolen the gas. I went over what the attendant said to her again, and that clearly the attendant acknowledged that it was a mistake, so she was free to leave.
She was still sobbing when I said I had to let her go because this was not a matter for us. The very next call I got came in on the non-emergency line and it's the attendant from the gas station. She's super worried about the lady having the meltdown over getting at least $20 in free gas. The attendant was pretty sure that the lady wasn’t fit to drive due to all of the tears.
The attendant was just as baffled as I was over the lady's reaction to free gas.
36. The Call Is Coming From Inside The House
white smartphone near laptopPhoto by Rahul Chakraborty on UnsplashI was invited to my friend's house for a girls night. My friend has a kid and when I arrived it was already past his bedtime, so I decided not to ring the doorbell but to call my friend on her mobile and ask her to let me in. I dial and then...nothing.
I wait and wait for the call to go through, but nothing happens. Okay, then. I hang up and try to get my friend's attention by gently knocking. It works, she lets me in, and we begin drinking. Shortly after, my friend gets a voicemail and listens to it. She goes pale, swears, and plays it for all of us.
It's some pretty loud heavy breathing. The sound of someone getting it on, basically. Gross. We're all pretty freaked out, wondering who would do something like that, and if they called her phone on purpose or if it was just some random dialing a random number.
After much discussion, she decides to use the "call this number back" option, and as she is too spooked to talk to whoever might be on the other end, I bravely volunteer, prepared to cuss out some pervert for messing with my friend. You can guess where this is going.
She hands me the phone, having already dialed. Everyone is waiting with bated breath and my heart is beating like crazy. It rings, rings…And my own phone on the table starts ringing! Turns out that when I was waiting in front of the door, completely out of breath after having biked there for 30 minutes and then climbed four flights of stairs, the call did in fact go through to her voicemail.
My heavy breathing sounds remarkably like getting it on.
37. Can I Take A Message?
silver imac on white tablePhoto by N.Tho.Duc on UnsplashI was using my roommate's desktop Mac, and any notification you get on your iPhone will appear on-screen on all of your other Apple devices. I was on the computer in his bedroom while he was in the kitchen getting a snack, and he received a phone call from an unknown number. I saw the notification pop up on his screen.
I had an option to answer the call for him. I thought it would be funny if I took the call before he could answer it on his phone meaning he would have to run through to his bedroom where I would be silently laughing myself to an early grave. I clicked to answer expecting it to be some kind of cold-call, but it wasn’t.
That voice on the other end, amplified by my roommate's gratuitous speaker setup, went, “Hello. This is official business.” My soul then left my body. I absolutely cannonballed out of his room making the most apologetic eye contact I have ever made with a human being. He’d been caught in a “traffic incident” while out.
They got his contact details from the dashcam footage of his registration plate. They were calling him in for some questioning. It was a wonderfully devious experience, for which I was absolutely not prepared, and we have never spoken of it since.
38. That’s Wassup
white and gray concrete buildingPhoto by Giovanna on UnsplashWhen I was a college exchange student in Germany I asked my mom to call my home university's housing department on my behalf to inquire about my assigned dorm room for the next school year. You couldn't book online back then and their telephone hold times were legendarily long. To call the university from Germany was way too expensive, so my mom called on my behalf.
She explained that I was abroad on exchange, but when the lady put her on hold to check on my assignment, she didn't mute the phone. My mom heard, “This lady is calling for her daughter. When are these parents going to make these kids grow up and manage their own lives"?
She then returned and told my mom that I didn't get my first or second building request, completely unaware that my mom had heard her. Guess who got their first building and room pick upon return?
39. Friends Are A Blessing
black and yellow smartphone casePhoto by Denis Cherkashin on UnsplashIn high school, my friends and I started this thing where we gave each other funny contact names in our phones based on inside jokes. My high school friends’ contact names are things such as Baby America, Sugar Mama, and even weirder names. When we were juniors, there was a girl who was obsessed with a friend.
This led to me changing his contact name to “Booty Lord” with some rather suggestive emojis following it. Everything was fine and dandy until a few months later, when I had forgotten about it. I was applying for a leadership position in a club where I was a member and was required to have two letters of recommendation.
For the second letter, I asked one of my teachers, who was a very conservative man in his late 70s, if he could write one for me. Being a lazy man, he told me to write the letter myself with all the things I wanted him to say in it. Then he’d sign. After I finished writing it, I handed him my phone to let him read it.
I needed him to approve it before I printed it out. About 45 seconds after I gave him my phone, he, very loudly and incredulously, said, “Booty Lord?” and gave me a horrified look and shoved the phone back into my hands. That was hard to explain.
40. A Creature Of Habit
woman wearing eyeglassesPhoto by Mosoianu Bogdan on UnsplashDuring one of my cold calls at a call center, I was speaking to a seemingly very sweet if not a little sad-sounding old lady. She very politely told me something like, "No, I don't think so, it's just not a good time". We said our goodbyes, but as I'm navigating my software to hang up I realize she was still on the phone. Then it got really creepy.
I hear her walk a few paces, presumably to a sink where the faucet starts to run, and then she begins talking to herself. She repeats only that one phrase on a loop as if she's rehearsing it: "No I don't think so, it's just not a good time". She said it over and over in the same cadence and tone, for roughly two minutes before the creepiness got the better of my curiosity.
41. Sorry, Mom
a tablet computer sitting on top of a tablePhoto by David Švihovec on UnsplashMy roommate’s mom visited and we decided to go to lunch. While waiting, my roomie took out her iPad. We started playing Sorry. She didn't think of how all her devices were linked because a, "u wanna bang," text notification came on her screen. That was mortifying enough—but what came next was so much worse: A thumbnail of the dude’s junk. Sorry indeed.
42. Let Them Eat Cake
six teal icing cupcakes with sprinklesPhoto by Brooke Lark on UnsplashI work in a hospital and last week the operator was having a conversation with someone at 3:00 am. She did not realize it was broadcast over the entire hospital PA system. The conversation went like this: “I can’t believe they gave those nurses stupid cupcakes for nurses week. They should have gotten a bonus instead”.
I just about peed my pants laughing, but you know what? That lady was spot on.
43. Picture Perfect Parenting
turned on gold iphone 6Photo by Sara Kurfeß on UnsplashMy father-and-law and I were looking at pictures on my phone. My wife texted me, and the banner on the top of the screen read, "I've been a bad girl. I need a spanking…or maybe just a hard pounding?" Dude looked at me. I answered, "What kind of daughter did you raise?" He did not laugh as hard as I think he should have.
44. Beyond Tasteless
woman in black headphones holding black and silver headphonesPhoto by Charanjeet Dhiman on UnsplashOne time I got a call from some lady at a call center, and from her voice you could tell she was a hefty type of gal —she was the heavy breathing type. Anyway, the call ended but I didn’t press end since I assumed they would. They didn’t. I could hear this lady talking to her coworkers about fried liver and onions.
The way she talked and gushed over it made it sound so lewd. It was disgusting. She said she has it at least once a day as her meal. She even made slurping sounds followed by some type of moaning. I’ve never felt so disgusted in my life listening to someone describe food.
45. She Who Shall Not Be Named
brown rotary dial telephone in gray painted roomPhoto by Annie Spratt on UnsplashMy grandfather was once on the phone with his mother while his mother's sister was sitting beside her. When his mother went to hang up she said, “Love you, bye” as normal, but she forgot to hang up. It went from normal to tragic in an instant. The sister said, “You don’t really love him do you”?
To which his mother said, “No, not at all". Unfortunately, she outlived all her kids, but she passed on last year and I still refuse to call her my great-grandmother.
46. Did You Want Something?
two women laughing and holding a smartphonePhoto by Shingi Rice on UnsplashMy boyfriend has a friend that I have always suspected is in love with him. Once, she was showing me something on her phone, and a text from her mom popped up saying, “I still don’t understand why you can’t get with [bf’s name].” We pretended it didn’t happen.
47. The Math Ain’t Mathing
blue and white train under white clouds during daytimePhoto by Vadim Artyukhin on UnsplashOn my 21st birthday, I stupidly drank myself into oblivion. At the end of the night, I staggered over to the skytrain where there was this glorious 10-foot-tall stone abacus. Naturally, one's first instinct while under the influence is to play with an object of such wonder. It absolutely crushed my hand and broke through my fingernail.
But do I need a doctor? No way! I sauntered onto the train and proceeded to bleed profusely. A stranger handed me a glove to wrap around the wound and the rest of the night was a blur. Apparently, I had pocket-dialed my significant other when I sat on the train and he could hear people trying to offer me help while I screamed, "Don't trust the abacus! Screw the Abacus"!
Apparently, this went on for a long time before I started telling people that I injured my hand in the war. The moral of the story? You can't trust the abacus.
48. Scary Teenagers
woman walking near buildingPhoto by ian dooley on UnsplashOne of my classes in high school had a group chat to talk about homework and stuff, and when the nickname function got introduced, a lot of people ended up with exactly the type of nicknames you would expect from high schoolers. I was showing my dad a picture or something when the messenger bubble popped on the screen.
It said, "hxrny hardtick sent a message." My dad just like, awkwardly coughed and then stood up and walked away before I could explain. He never brought it up again, and I never got in trouble for it, so it could have been worse. I'm sure my dad was mildly traumatized seeing that on his teenage daughter's phone though.
49. The Way Of The Dododo
a person holding up a cell phone with the muppets on itPhoto by Brad on UnsplashOne time when I was using voip software on my work computer I was leaving a message for a client about data conversion services. After I left the message I thought I had hung up and I started singing the Jim Henson song, “Mana Mana Doo Doo Dododo”. Then noticed I was still on the call, so I hung up. I thought it was the end...it wasn't.
The next morning I come in to check the conversion voicemails. There was a very clear and professional message left by the client. He left his contact number and said to have a nice day followed by a short pause. Then he starts to sing the same song from the first message, picking up where I had left off when I realized I was still being recorded by the voicemail.
It was hilarious and made my day.
50. Nothing to Hide
woman in black tank top covering her face with her handsPhoto by Julia Taubitz on UnsplashOh boy, I have one and it is famous at my company now. I was the one to see the notification.
I teach English in China and two years ago I arrived at my first job about a month late thanks to visa issues. I survive the first two days OK and now it’s Friday and I get invited to a co-worker’s apartment to hang out, have a beer and meet some other expats. There's just a handful of us chatting and drinking casually.
Sometime later people have walked off or called it a night and it’s just me, a guy and a girl sitting on a couch. The guy shows me his phone, he wants to show me this mobile game that's very popular here in China. As he's doing this, a message pops up. It reads:
"I want your body in my mouth right now." It’s from the other girl in the room.
Me and the guy make brief eye contact immediately and then I look at her. She goes beet red and leaves the room. I'm then informed that I am the second person other than them in the company to know that the two of them are an item. She wasn't a shy girl at all and we now frequently make reference to this event.
And here’s a bonus happy ending: Mr. Body and Ms. Mouth are getting married this summer too!
Experiencing death is a fascinating and frightening idea.
Who doesn't want to know what is waiting for us on the other side?
But so many of us want to know and then come back and live a little longer.
It would be so great to be sure there is something else.
But the whole dying part is not that great, so we'll have to rely on other people's accounts.
Redditor AlaskaStiletto wanted to hear from everyone who has returned to life, so they asked:
"Redditors who have 'died' and come back to life, what did you see?"
Sensations
Happy Good Vibes GIF by Major League SoccerGiphy"My dad's heart stopped when he had a heart attack and he had to be brought back to life. He kept the paper copy of the heart monitor which shows he flatlined. He said he felt an overwhelming sensation of peace, like nothing he had felt before."
PeachesnPain
Recovery
"I had surgical complications in 2010 that caused a great deal of blood loss. As a result, I had extremely low blood pressure and could barely stay awake. I remember feeling like I was surrounded by loved ones who had passed. They were in a circle around me and I knew they were there to guide me onwards. I told them I was not ready to go because my kids needed me and I came back."
"My nurse later said she was afraid she’d find me dead every time she came into the room."
"It took months, and blood transfusions, but I recovered."
good_golly99
Take Me Back
"Overwhelming peace and happiness. A bright airy and floating feeling. I live a very stressful life. Imagine finding out the person you have had a crush on reveals they have the same feelings for you and then you win the lotto later that day - that was the feeling I had."
"I never feared death afterward and am relieved when I hear of people dying after suffering from an illness."
rayrayrayray
Free
The Light Minnie GIF by (G)I-DLEGiphy"I had a heart surgery with near-death experience, for me at least (well the possibility that those effects are caused by morphine is also there) I just saw black and nothing else but it was warm and I had such inner peace, its weird as I sometimes still think about it and wish this feeling of being so light and free again."
TooReDTooHigh
This is why I hate surgery.
You just never know.
Shocked
Giphy"More of a near-death experience. I was electrocuted. I felt like I was in a deep hole looking straight up in the sky. My life flashed before me. Felt sad for my family, but I had a deep sense of peace."
Admirable_Buyer6528
The SOB
"Nursing in the ICU, we’ve had people try to die on us many times during the years, some successfully. One guy stood out to me. His heart stopped. We called a code, are working on him, and suddenly he comes to. We hadn’t vented him yet, so he was able to talk, and he started screaming, 'Don’t let them take me, don’t let them take me, they are coming,' he was scared and yelling."
"Then he yelled a little more, as we tried to calm him down, he screamed, 'No, No,' and gestured towards the end of the bed, and died again. We didn’t get him back. It was seriously creepy. We called his son to tell him the news, and the son said basically, 'Good, he was an SOB.'”
1-cupcake-at-a-time
Colors
"My sister died and said it was extremely peaceful. She said it was very loud like a train station and lots of talking and she was stuck in this area that was like a curtain with lots of beautiful colors (colors that you don’t see in real life according to her) a man told her 'He was sorry, but she had to go back as it wasn’t her time.'"
Hannah_LL7
"I had a really similar experience except I was in an endless garden with flowers that were colors I had never seen before. It was quiet and peaceful and a woman in a dress looked at me, shook her head, and just said 'Not yet.' As I was coming back, it was extremely loud, like everyone in the world was trying to talk all at once. It was all very disorienting but it changed my perspective on life!"
huntokarrr
The Fog
"I was in a gray fog with a girl who looked a lot like a young version of my grandmother (who was still alive) but dressed like a pioneer in the 1800s she didn't say anything but kept pulling me towards an opening in the wall. I kept refusing to go because I was so tired."
"I finally got tired of her nagging and went and that's when I came to. I had bled out during a c-section and my heart could not beat without blood. They had to deliver the baby and sew up the bleeders. refill me with blood before they could restart my heart so, like, at least 12 minutes gone."
Fluffy-Hotel-5184
Through the Walls
"My spouse was dead for a couple of minutes one miserable night. She maintains that she saw nothing, but only heard people talking about her like through a wall. The only thing she remembers for absolute certain was begging an ER nurse that she didn't want to die."
"She's quite alive and well today."
Hot-Refrigerator6583
Well let's all be happy to be alive.
It seems to be all we have.
Trying to lose weight is a struggle understood by many people regardless of size.
The goal of reaching a healthy weight may seem unattainable, but with diet and exercise, it can pay off through persistence and discipline.
Seeing the pounds gradually drop off can also be a great motivator and incentivize people to stay the course.
Those who've achieved their respective weight goals shared their experiences when Redditor apprenti8455 asked:
"People who lost a lot of weight, what surprises you the most now?"
Redditors didn't see these coming.
Shiver Me Timbers
"I’m always cold now!"
– Telrom_1
"I had a coworker lose over 130 pounds five or six years ago. I’ve never seen him without a jacket on since."
– r7ndom
"140 lbs lost here starting just before COVID, I feel like that little old lady that's always cold, damn this top comment was on point lmao."
– mr_remy
Drawing Concern
"I lost 100 pounds over a year and a half but since I’m old(70’s) it seems few people comment on it because (I think) they think I’m wasting away from some terminal illness."
– dee-fondy
"Congrats on the weight loss! It’s honestly a real accomplishment 🙂"
"Working in oncology, I can never comment on someone’s weight loss unless I specifically know it was on purpose, regardless of their age. I think it kind of ruffles feathers at times, but like I don’t want to congratulate someone for having cancer or something. It’s a weird place to be in."
– LizardofDeath
Unleashing Insults
"I remember when I lost the first big chunk of weight (around 50 lbs) it was like it gave some people license to talk sh*t about the 'old' me. Old coworkers, friends, made a lot of not just negative, but harsh comments about what I used to look like. One person I met after the big loss saw a picture of me prior and said, 'Wow, we wouldn’t even be friends!'”
"It wasn’t extremely common, but I was a little alarmed by some of the attention. My weight has been up and down since then, but every time I gain a little it gets me a little down thinking about those things people said."
– alanamablamaspama
Not Everything Goes After Losing Weight
"The loose skin is a bit unexpected."
– KeltarCentauri
"I haven’t experienced it myself, but surgery to remove skin takes a long time to recover. Longer than bariatric surgery and usually isn’t covered by insurance unless you have both."
– KatMagic1977
"It definitely does take a long time to recover. My Dad dropped a little over 200 pounds a few years back and decided to go through with skin removal surgery to deal with the excess. His procedure was extensive, as in he had skin taken from just about every part of his body excluding his head, and he went through hell for weeks in recovery, and he was bedridden for a lot of it."
– Jaew96
These Redditors shared their pleasantly surprising experiences.
Shopping
"I can buy clothes in any store I want."
– WaySavvyD
"When I lost weight I was dying to go find cute, smaller clothes and I really struggled. As someone who had always been restricted to one or two stores that catered to plus-sized clothing, a full mall of shops with items in my size was daunting. Too many options and not enough knowledge of brands that were good vs cheap. I usually went home pretty frustrated."
– ganache98012
No More Symptoms
"Lost about 80 pounds in the past year and a half, biggest thing that I’ve noticed that I haven’t seen mentioned on here yet is my acid reflux and heartburn are basically gone. I used to be popping tums every couple hours and now they just sit in the medicine cabinet collecting dust."
– colleennicole93
Expanding Capabilities
"I'm all for not judging people by their appearance and I recognise that there are unhealthy, unachievable beauty standards, but one thing that is undeniable is that I can just do stuff now. Just stamina and flexibility alone are worth it, appearance is tertiary at best."
– Ramblonius
People Change Their Tune
"How much nicer people are to you."
"My feet weren't 'wide' they were 'fat.'"
– LiZZygsu
"Have to agree. Lost 220 lbs, people make eye contact and hold open doors and stuff"
"And on the foot thing, I also lost a full shoe size numerically and also wear regular width now 😅"
– awholedamngarden
It's gonna take some getting used to.
Bones Everywhere
"Having bones. Collarbones, wrist bones, knee bones, hip bones, ribs. I have so many bones sticking out everywhere and it’s weird as hell."
– Princess-Pancake-97
"I noticed the shadow of my ribs the other day and it threw me, there’s a whole skeleton in here."
– bekastrange
Knee Pillow
"Right?! And they’re so … pointy! Now I get why people sleep with pillows between their legs - the knee bones laying on top of each other (side sleeper here) is weird and jarring."
– snic2030
"I lost only 40 pounds within the last year or so. I’m struggling to relate to most of these comments as I feel like I just 'slimmed down' rather than dropped a ton. But wow, the pillow between the knees at night. YES! I can relate to this. I think a lot of my weight was in my thighs. I never needed to do this up until recently."
– Strongbad23
More Mobility
"I’ve lost 100 lbs since 2020. It’s a collection of little things that surprise me. For at least 10 years I couldn’t put on socks, or tie my shoes. I couldn’t bend over and pick something up. I couldn’t climb a ladder to fix something. Simple things like that I can do now that fascinate me."
"Edit: Some additional little things are sitting in a chair with arms, sitting in a booth in a restaurant, being able to shop in a normal store AND not needing to buy the biggest size there, being able to easily wipe my butt, and looking down and being able to see my penis."
– dma1965
People making significant changes, whether for mental or physical health, can surely find a newfound perspective on life.
But they can also discover different issues they never saw coming.
That being said, overcoming any challenge in life is laudable, especially if it leads to gaining confidence and ditching insecurities.