People Explain Which Significant Event Marks A 'Before' And 'After' In Their Lives
There are always turning points.
Before and after is a serious part of life.
We change in these moments.
From one phase to the next.
Redditor CantStalkMeNowLmao wanted to discuss the moments in life when the massive change happened.
"What event divided your life into 'before' and 'after?'"
My life is all about weight.
The gaining and the losing.
It's all before and after sizes.
Happy Occasions?Naturi Naughton Starz GIF by PowerGiphy
"Event #1 - getting married. Event #2 - getting divorced."
"I am trying to figure out which one of these I would go with if I could only have one."
"Death of my dad! I had to grow up so much faster due to court fights against my mother. I now don't speak to her so I'm pretty much parentless. I will always encourage people to have their will up to date because death brings out the worst in people."
WildCelebrate Stir Crazy GIF by This GIF Is HauntedGiphy
"I fell on my a** and broke 2 vertebrae."
"Lost 80 pounds (? 40 kg) and changed my job."
"Life was wild."
"I'm sure most people will say something like: marriage or birth of their kids. For me, it was having my anus removed."
"I live with Crohn's disease, which is where the body starts attacking your intestines. Mine was so bad that the only option was removing all the afflicted parts, where were the anus and rectum."
"So first the surgeons re-route the intestines to a surgically made opening on the abdomen. This is called an ostomy.
Then the diseased parts are removed, including the sphincter muscles of the rectum. Finally, everything is stitched up. It's often called a 'Barbie butt' surgery because the patient ends up with a backside that looks like a Barbie doll."
"Rehab. About 6 years ago I moved a few hours away from my hometown. I stopped talking to everyone I used to associate with, I changed my phone number, I quit social media. It’s nice being sober but when I quit drugs I found I have bad depression, so now I just sit in my apartment all day on days I don’t work. I don’t have any friends or anyone to talk to. But at least I’m not spending 100% of my time and money trying to get heroin or meth."
So many endings and beginnings...
Different countryhappy well done GIFGiphy
"Moving to a different country for me. My whole life changed. Different country, moved in with a partner, different job, different language... Would I do it again? No, probably not. Would I move back? No."
"My father's death. He died suddenly, and it turned our lives upside down. I wasn't a child, I was 20, but I still wasn't ready to lose a parent, let alone without warning."
"Plus, my grieving process wasn't exactly healthy in its beginning, so a lot of the repercussions of that are still at play to this day. Yes, I did go to therapy, and it did wonders, but it can't undo the consequences of my actions back when my father's passing was recent. I lost friends, I lost time in university, I effed my body up."
Found my feet
"Mum and dad dying of cancer within six months, we had to sell our childhood home and my sister married an abusive guy who only hung around long enough to spend her money. I was lucky I was taken in by my aunt until I found my feet but could easily have ended up homeless."
"Birth of my daughter. I have trouble remembering a time before her, and she's only 15. Not trouble remembering stuff events before her, but in my head with old memories I'm like 'let's see, how old was she when that happened?'"
"The part that is terrifying though (for me anyways), is how much slower life was before my daughter. Just way less happened in those years so they felt like they just stretched on and on. Now I’ll jolt upright in the middle of the day at like “Holy s**t she was born yesterday but also six years ago.”
I'm OutI Love La Los Angeles GIF by vhspositiveGiphy
"I moved from my hometown to Los Angeles to get into the film industry. I didn't ever really make it in film, but that decision to move might have been the first big change in my life that wasn't approved by my parents."
"The deaths of my older brother & my mom within two years of each other. I was really close to both if them now my life is permanently changed I just see the world differently."
"Dropping out of university."
"I was a traumatized, depressed, and anxious young person who couldn't see a life that didn't involve completing a degree, and I was drowning. Letting go of that future was terrifying, but it had been dragging me down for years at this point."
"The whole world opened up for me. My "after" has been hard work, but I love it."
Against My Parents' Wishes
"At the age of twenty, I went against my parents' wishes and abandoned my study of physics for a degree in the performing arts. My father, an engineer, (as are all my brothers) didn't speak to me for two years."
"Recently retired from a 45 year career as a property master, first for live theatre, then for television, film, and eventually blockbuster-level features. I've been asked by some of the most creative people on the planet, whose names are household words, to help them make movies in some of the most beautiful, desolate and challenging environments to be found. Loved nearly every minute of it."
"That one moment of decision changed me from a dutiful, manipulable and obedient child into a fully-functioning, independent adult."
"My grandfather murdered his wife when I was like 10. So, that."
Life changes every second. Be ready....
Do you have similar before and afters to share? Let us know in the comments below.
Reddit user LightningStrikes818 asked: 'Redditors who are 50+ years old, what has changed the most about working when you started working vs working nowadays?'
It feels like the workplace is constantly changing, especially since the pandemic, with more people working from home, more systems being automated, and more social pressure for workplaces to evolve.
But it's even more jarring to think of how much the workplace has changed for those who have been in the workforce for many decades and how seemingly every aspect of their work has changed... at least once.
Redditor LightningStrikes818 asked:
"Redditors who are 50 years old or older, what has changed the most about working when you started working vs. working nowadays?"
"Skirts/dresses and pantyhose required of women in many offices through the 1990s."
"Flipside: suits and ties, buttoned-up shirts. Brutal in summer."
"Pantyhose were high maintenance. I had to have an extra pair in my desk drawer in case of a major run. I had clear nail polish at home and work to stop any runs above the hemline."
"Pantyhose were expensive, I had nice department store hose for special occasions, and bulk mail order hose for daily wear. They had to be washed in mesh bags and hung to dry."
"In the summer I’d get swamp crotch when it was hot and humid, and heat rash on my thighs where they rubbed."
"Heels had to be polished and the heel tips replaced at the shoe shop. Most office clothes were dry clean only, and it was expensive, and yet another errand. Office clothes were expensive, I didn’t have many clothes, I had to plan what to wear and time the dry cleaning."
"I don’t miss the nightmare of heels and hose from the 80’s."
Electrical Transfer, Who?
"Having to go to the bank to cash my paycheck."
"Oh my god, yes, and we needed to wait until after 3:00 PM to cash it."
Work and... Strip Clubs?
"We took a company van with a logo on it to take out-of-town guests to a strip club. I don’t even think I can say that out loud at work today."
"Strip clubs were standard practice. Especially in sales. Many deals closed in those places over my career."
"People smoking indoors. Clouds of smoke everywhere in the office and no way for a nonsmoker to avoid it. That was the norm so you just had to suck it up."
"Yes, at one stage I had the misfortune of sitting next to someone who used to smoke a pipe. I could barely see my computer screen at times for the clouds of smoke."
"Also, the IT support guy would come over to do something and he always had a cigarette dangling from his lips, dropping ash into my keyboard. Urgh! Different times!"
Office Parties of Old
"Man, in state government, all the older employees have similar stories of work parties in the 90s. Booze everywhere, smoking, people dancing, and having fun. Everyone brought their spouses, etc."
"Now you're lucky if you see a Christmas cake. People wonder why everything feels like it's coming apart at the seams and people are so unhappy. That aspect of being a human being fun, even at work is gone."
"I'm a millennial in industrial equipment sales, and it genuinely feels like you showed up to a party about an hour after everyone was gone."
"Nowadays, I can't even have a beer with dinner and expect to expense it."
"Oh man, the office Christmas parties then, versus now?? Forget about it. Like comparing a wedding to a funeral."
"I'm 42 but feel like I want to chime in."
"Health and safety has changed loads. You wouldn't get away with half the sh*t we did when I was 17."
Constantly, Always Sitting
"I watched office work go from sedentary to virtually immobile. We used to retrieve paper files, pass memos around, and consult with coworkers in other sections and floors."
"Now everything is available on the screen in front of us, everything can be shared with a few clicks. It’s convenient, but so unhealthy."
What's a Pension Again?
"Hardly anybody has a pension anymore."
"That's where I feel really lucky to be in Australia, we have mandatory superannuation (a percentage of your pay plus employer contribution goes into a fund for your retirement) and most people will also qualify for an age care pension in addition to their super."
"The pension isn't really enough for our current seniors who don't have much super (due to the timeline of when it was introduced) but generations after that should be relatively well set up for retirement."
Work Availability in General
"I'm in the UK."
"It was a great deal easier to find work. You'd get vacancies posted in various places and could go down to the Job Centre, browse vacancies posted on postcards on boards, pick out the jobs you were interested in, and get a member of staff to arrange an interview for you. Just like that."
"Dress codes were more formal and you actually had to go to work. If you worked in an office for the right company work finished Friday lunchtime when you'd go with your colleagues to the pub. You'd go back after the 'liquid' lunch hour and work Friday afternoon, but no sh*t got done and work piled up for Monday."
"You got paid either direct debit, cash or if you were unlucky by cheque. You had to deposit your cheque in the bank or building society and wait for the cheque to clear, usually four days, but sometimes 10 days. If you got paid cash you'd get it in a small brown envelope known as a wage packet which listed all deductions on the outside. It still felt good to tear open the wage packet and take out the cash."
The Value of Employees
"That you chose a career, and you worked for an employee, and they valued your experience. You rose in the ranks of your profession, you became a valued team member, and you stayed until you retired."
"Changing jobs often is frowned on; if you make a job commitment, you follow through on it. People get bothered and quit/move/change really quickly now. That's not necessarily bad, but it has created a gap in expertise; everyone is new all the time, and there isn't any value in having experience."
"If you happen to be an elder in your field with some level of legacy knowledge; it doesn't seem to matter because your boss is likely younger than you and less experienced."
"There used to be jobs what you did to get paid and live, and careers, what you did because you wanted to invest time into being good at something, AND that was how you made a living."
"Moreover, you went to school to be in a career. So you put time and energy into attaining your job, therefore you'd want to stay in it and grow. In theory."
"I'm not sure anyone cares about being in a career anymore. Because we all feel so betrayed by the system; wages not keeping up with COL, inflation, (and inflation subsiding and prices staying high because it's what the market will bear), and when everyone is replaceable, then no one is an expert."
"I'm GenX. I work in healthcare. I work in a broken system that no one actually wants to fix. Those of us working in this system are now just grist for the mill. It's too bad because we spent a lot of time and money going to school to be able to work in our chosen field."
"In contrast, my mom was also a nurse. She had a career. She worked in it until she was 70 and retired. She worked with a team that mostly stayed the same, over decades. I don't work with anyone I started with at my job six years ago."
"People used to answer their business phones."
"Oh my god, work landline numbers. I never see those anymore. I don’t even have a phone number in my email signature at work anymore."
"And business cards used to be such a big deal. I used to get really excited to see my name and title in print. I would always send my parents one when I got a new job. What a dork!"
What Work-Life Balance?
"There was a lot more understanding back in the 80's and 90's that each employee had a life outside of work, and work would end at 5:00 PM. You could leave work and go do something that you liked, maybe a martial arts class or some learning workshop somewhere."
"There were no phone calls. Text messages and email hadn't happened yet. Pagers were rare. People were in better shape. They had time to workout and were encouraged by their bosses to go do something to keep in shape."
"These days, it's the opposite. There's no encouragement from your boss or your coworkers other than to just work around the clock. You're never 'off.' Emails, text messages, Slack messages, video calls, and 'tickets' from your company's internal issue tracking system come in at all hours of the day."
"You're tracked in every way possible these days. You're given impossible deadlines. It now takes incredible willpower to break free and 'sneak' away to go workout. You're exhausted all the time, so you lose the desire to workout. You just want sleep."
"Instead of meeting up with friends somewhere for dinner, you are happy to just get home, get something hot to eat from your microwave, and numb yourself by watching YouTube and Reddit."
"What you do now during your downtime is very low quality and is just done to unwind from the stress that follows you no matter where you are. They call this Flex Time, and its purpose is ostensibly to give you the ability to walk away from your work and go enjoy life. Funny."
New Measures of Success
"Working for a company for many years was seen as honorable and a sign you were a good worker."
"Now it’s viewed as someone complacent, scared of change, and stupid for not salary hopping."
"I don’t disagree, though; I’ve been at my company for a long time and it’s anything but complacent and always changing."
"This is why we in-betweeners especially (between gen-x and millennial) have been conflicted and confused about it all. We were raised by older boomers and heard it's best to stay with companies because it looks bad on resumes to not and can even affect your buying things like houses and cars."
"But then when we did, we were let go during times like the recession and cutbacks having to start all over again, on top of not getting raises like the new hires and then confused because we were told staying and being loyal looked good and led to success."
A Literal Paper Trail
"Paper. Lots of paper."
"Before email, there were people (secretaries or admins) who would take a memo someone printed out on their computer, make physical copies, and either walk around to every executive’s desk, or put into inter-office mail. This memo could be to a few people, one person, or for a general announcement needed to go to everyone."
"For expediency, these memos would also be posted in public areas (lunchroom, messaging board) if it was a general notice. These memos were often routed from the head manager throughout the department if it was more for general information."
"We once had a wave of new hires (about 20 people in our company of 400) and each got their own announcement. So, 20 people and 50 copies was two reams of paper. Copied. Hand carried or inter-department mailed. For one set of announcements."
"Oh, and each department admin had their own routing slip (small piece of paper with each person in the department’s name) that was stapled to the announcement. When you got the memo, you read it, crossed your name off, and gave it to the next person on the list."
"That’s where 'they must not have gotten the memo' comes from."
It's interesting to look back on how things have changed. While some things have definitely improved, like improved safety precautions and more relaxed attire, other things like a sense of work-life balance have certainly declined.
If people were able to choose their working conditions, it'd be interesting to see if they'd choose today's working conditions or a different work-life balance...
There are countless tropes in movies and books that people love to follow.
From enemies to lovers, to final girls, to certain types of jump scares, there are people who will read a book or watch a movie simply because their favorite trope has been promised to be in there!
A much-loved trope is the strong female main character, or even the strong female sidekick, and fortunately, they're becoming much more commonly represented.
Redditor carlories asked:
"What movie did the 'strong female' trope right?"
"She's not a supersleuth like on 'CSI' or 'Criminal Minds.' 'Fargo' is the original 'competence p*rn.'"
"Her relationship with Norm is one of my favorite parts of the movie. Her genuine joy when she finds out he got his duck on the stamp is incredible."
"A while back on Twitter, someone asked to name movies that feature a female protagonist who is competent at her job, in an established relationship with a man (the relationship does not start during the events of the film), and her partner does not criticize her work or encourage her to give up."
"The only movie people could name that fully satisfied these requirements was 'Fargo.'"
The Silence of the Lambs
"There is so much Clarice had to deal with re men not taking her seriously all through the storyline. Then she figures it out with her bestie."
"Her bestie Hannibal Lecter."
"It's funny how in his own sick way he was supportive of her and believed in her. He's a monster but not a sexist. Then he somehow talks to that disgusting guy in the jail cell next to him that assaulted her into eating his own tongue."
"I also love the part at the end where they tell her that he escaped and ask if she wants to go into hiding and she says, 'I don't think he will come after me. He would consider it rude.'"
"A major theme of the movie is identity, both self-identity and the identities that society tries to put on people. A sub-theme of that is 'contradictory identities within one person.'"
"For Clarice Starling, she was both a smart badass (recall how she was introduced) and also a little girl (again, the introduction). Hannibal Lecter is both an absolute brute (to the point of being less of a barbarian and more of a wild, rabid animal) but also a highly intelligent, educated, and even courteous modern-day renaissance man."
"I f**king love it. This is one of my favorite movies."
"I love that Arnold has said that she’s the star of the movie, not him."
"Linda reached out to him to help her workout, apparently, so she could be a totally different Sarah Connor in the sequel."
"For that reason, watching those movies back to back is always a great experience! Her voice changes at the end of the first movie as she begins the most insane mission ever, but you can tell she’s just getting started."
"In 'Terminator 2,' she is such a bada**, but also mentally broken. It’s hard to make all of that believable in a single character, but Linda did it!"
"My favorite part of Linda’s performance is when she sees the Terminator step out of the elevator. Up until this point, she’s been established as a completely different person from who she was in the first film."
"She’s absolutely fearless, ruthless, and can adapt to any situation. Then, she literally sees her worst nightmare slowly walk off the elevator and turn to look at her."
"She falls helplessly to the floor, totally consumed by fear, and then immediately sprints back into the arms of the people who had been abusing her for years."
"I love this meme about 'Alien.'"
"The writer: 'Sooooo, I have been writing reviews for about ten years. My wife's review of 'Alien' puts everything I have ever written to shame.'"
"The wife: 'Alien is a movie where nobody listens to the smart woman, and then they all die except for the smart woman and her cat. Four stars.'"
"Sigourney Weaver nailed it at every turn. Today's 'strong females' just don't induce suspension of disbelief for me. Weaver had me utterly convinced that every single thing she did was one hundred percent possible and logical."
"Laura Dern in 'Jurassic Park.' Seeing a strong woman in science at such a young age had a profound impact on me, and I truly think it’s one of the reasons I am a scientist today."
"And Lex saved the day with her computer skills."
"'X-Files.' I can't believe I haven't seen that yet. She was highly intelligent with a strong confidence that couldn't be beaten down by the sexists in the early seasons nor the crushing but invisible power of the Syndicate."
"She’s always one of my first thoughts when someone asks this question. She’s smart and doesn’t let anyone make her feel less than them, and she knows who she is."
"She’s kind and patient with others but takes no bulls**t. She doesn’t let being in a boys’ club push her into trying to be 'one of the boys,' nor will she accept any misogyny."
"She’s dedicated to her job and to her partner. Between her and Mulder she’s actually the trigger-happy one!"
"She also of course influenced a lot of young girls to go into STEM fields (see 'The Scully Effect')."
Lilo and Stitch
"Nani is the best female character Disney has ever written. She’s 19, also dealing with the grief of losing her parents, and she’s giving up her dreams and working so she can take care of her little sister. Proper strong."
"One of the most heartbreaking details I read about the movie is how a corner of Nani’s room has a bunch of trophies, medals, and ribbons, all presumably for surfing. She was likely on her way to becoming a professional athlete when she gave all of that up to step up and take care of Lilo."
"Bruh, she was just 19, holding down an entire house, raising her little 'off-beat' sister, and then had CPS breathing down her back..."
"That moment you realize there is a very real threat in that movie, and it is NOT the aliens."
The Addams Family
"Morticia: 'I'm just like any modern woman trying to have it all. Loving husband, a family. It's just, I wish I had more time to seek out the dark forces and join their hellish crusade.'"
"Morticia Addams (from the 1960s series) has been the love of my life since I was six."
The Long Kiss Goodnight
"The Long Kiss Goodnight (1996) with Geena Davis was great and doesn't seem to get much love."
"'You’re going to die screaming. Am I telling the truth?'"
"She was, in fact, telling the truth."
Better Call Saul
"Not a movie but Kim Wexler in 'Better Call Saul.'"
"I wish I could upvote this more. The Emmys did Rhea Seehorn wrong, her performance in the entire series was incredible."
"Rachel Weisz playing Evie in 'The Mummy.'"
"'Take that, Bembridge Scholars!'"
"Evelyn: 'Look, I... I may not be an explorer or an adventurer, or a treasure-seeker or a gunfighter, Mr. O'Connell, but I am proud of what I am.'"
"Rick: 'And what is that?'"
"Evelyn: 'I... am a librarian.'"
"This movie and this character was the first time I felt like I could relate to a female character in an action movie. I felt seen. She needs help but she’s not helpless."
"And she is the one who really kills the mummy in the end too. The only one who was educated and studied enough to read the correct passage from the book. Love that movie."
"One of my favorite things about Mulan is that she's not the hyper-masculine female lead who's just as good as the men at everything. She was a young woman in the army; no, she was not going to be as physically strong as the men."
"She saved China because she used her strengths to her advantage. I think that that's much more valuable to young girls than some emotionally dead, oversexualized character who has no visible flaws."
"I love this one because it's a great deconstruction of how more feminine interests and hobbies are perceived."
"A girl can be ultra feminine, be super into stuff like fashion and tiny dogs and carry herself in a certain way, and still be clearly intelligent and capable."
"Oh, and also because she has an actual character arc in the movie too. That's super important. It's not enough to write a character who is just good at stuff. That's easy. Making them a growing and evolving human in a believable way is the hard part."
"Yesss. It's telling how many of the female characters listed in this thread are tomboyish fighters. People tend to think a strong female character is a woman who shed her femininity to kick some a**."
"This is why I love Elle. She actually reaches her full potential while actively embracing her hyper-femininity, and others are proven wrong for underestimating her due to that femininity."
"Even some of my favorites like 'Mean Girls' unfortunately fall into the trap of associating hyper-femininity with negative traits... I'm hoping the 'Barbie' movie follows in 'Legally Blonde''s footsteps on this front."
"Oh man, this movie is so good. I still catch myself thinking about it often. Totally mind-blowing."
"Not a movie but... Samantha Carter from 'Stargate SG1.'"
"She's an a**-kicking brainiac super scientist lady who was also kinda goofy at times and still very much in touch with her feminine side."
"What I like the most about her is that not only is she utterly indispensable to the team, but she doesn't overshadow any of the other team members, she never lords over others unless they're being a d**k to her first and in general, is a good person."
"She kicks a**, can take a joke and crack one too."
"What I really liked with her is that they made sure she wasn't the overall brainiac, she was the scientist, the tech guru, and she knew how things worked. But Daniel Jackson was the history/language/culture guy and they often had them working together with Daniel reading the instructions to tech written in alien languages while Sam did the reprogramming."
"She had one 'modern strong female character' moment in episode one, but apparently Amanda Tapping hated that line and they never made her say cringy s**t like that again. She wanted the character to not stand apart from the team because of her gender or have others act like 1980s movie sexist bullies towards her."
"She wanted her character to be a fully realized part of the team and for other characters to act like professional adults around her (except when they were under the influence of mind control but that didn't make them sexist)."
"Cannot recommend her enough."
While a lot of work still needs to be done to ensure that women receive he representation they deserve across the entertainment industry, it's wonderful to see such a long list of films, ranging from the '80s all the way up to being released this summer.
We've all heard creepy rumors or legends that have made falling to sleep far more challenging than necessary.
Such as ghosts that supposedly haunt old buildings or alligators supposedly lurking in sewer systems.
If there's anything guaranteed to send shivers down the spine of superstitious or panic-stricken individuals, it's learning that the terrifying information they've just been told is fact, and not fiction.
Making one nervous to step out their door in the morning, let alone fall asleep.
Redditor mimiqttt was eager to hear the most utterly spine-tingling facts people knew, leading them to ask:
"What are some creepy facts you know?"
For The Sake Of Transparency...
"Box Jellyfish are not only the most venomous jellies to humans, but they also possess at least 24 functional eyes (of various degree) on its body despite having no centralized brain."
"Four of its eyes always peer up out of the water regardless of the animal's body position."
"Some eyes can make out images, others are more primitive."- Southern_Gator
The Last Thing You'll Ever Hear...
"Hearing is the last sense you lose before dying."- HorrorPusherr
Talk About Keeping You Up At Night...
"Hundreds of people die every year."
"From being strangled by their bedsheets."- bender0x7d1Sunny Day Bed GIF by VVS FILMSGiphy
"If all bacteria in a cheese decided to move in the same direction the cheese would move quite a distance in a day."- Worldly-Traffic-5503
Deserving Of A Raised Brow...
"Due to human artificial selection, dogs are evolving eyebrows."- Light_of_Niwen
Beyond An Existential Problem...
"There is a condition where you just think you’re dead or don’t exist."
"People who have it sometimes stop eating because they think they’re dead."- BlueCanary434Sad Halloween GIF by This GIF Is HauntedGiphy
Among The Many Reasons You Should Always Knock...
"One of the most common places to find a dead body is on the toilet."
"Cause when they're alive and not feeling well, the first thing they do is go to the toilet thinking it could be a bowel issue."-pumpkinthighs
"Herculaneum is better preserved than Pompeii, it just hasn't been excavated as much."
"Pompeii was essentially destroyed by falling volcanic rock, it's dead later being buried by ash after rigor had set in."
"Herculaneum was destroyed by pyroclastic flows so hot that the liquids in people's bodies turned to vapor and exploded instantly."
"Currently, the population in the area is so large that the Italian government is having a hard time deciding whether or not it's worth it to warn or evacuate them or not."-Reddit
Can't Say It Ran In The Family
"In a strange and semi creepy coincidence, Robert Lincoln, son of Abraham Lincoln, was saved from falling off a train platform and being run over by Edwin Booth, brother of John Wilkes Booth."- Infamous-Piece3783train tracks natgeo channel GIF by National Geographic ChannelGiphy
A Job Not Fit For The Human Race.
"Cadaver dogs can smell bodies through waters."
"Lakes , etc."- PlaysTheTriangle
"If you build something in your yard against HOA rules, then it’s called an unwanted erection."- thecookiesmonster
When Your Body Starts Gaining Up On You...
"Your eyes have their own immune system that works separately from your body’s immune system."
"If your body’s immune system found out it would attack your eyes."
"I read this here and at my last eye appointment I asked if it was true."
"The eye doctor said 'Yeah, it’s kinda weird' and I was like 'kinda?'"- McSmackthe1stEyes Blink GIF by Eternal FamilyGiphy
Pretty And Delicate On The Outside...
"If given access to it, butterflies will happily drink blood."- supermarketblues
The Only Thing Scarier Than One Black Hole...
"During the merger of two black holes, a black holes can occasionally get ejected from the system and get shot out into open space and become a wandering black hole."
"The creepy part for me is that because a large part of the way in which we see black holes is through their interactions with their surroundings we wouldn’t really be able to see it coming towards us."- rflok34
Vanity Is A Sin, After All...
'Everyone who has ever owned the HOPE DIAMOND has met some sort of gruesome, untimely death."- QuietRulrOfEvrythingdiamond supply GIFGiphy
The world is a fascinating, often terrifying place.
Perhaps why some people firmly believe ignorance is bliss.
On the other hand, knowledge is power.
So if you see a school of jellyfish, you all now know better than to think they can't also see you...
It's no secret alcohol lowers inhibitions and sometimes messes with people's self-control.
Since I never saw the appeal of passing out, losing my memories of a party, or waking up in a strange place the next morning with nothing but the clothes on my back, I never drank myself past tipsy. That policy, however, enabled me to bear witness and remember the crazy things my friends did while drunk.
When I was in college, my roommate and I liked to cut across the woods to get to places faster. This was before every smartphone came with a built-in flashlight, and when flashlight apps were basically jokes. In order to get through the woods safely at night, we bought small, powerful flashlights at the start of the year.
We cut across those woods to get to a party one night, and my roommate got extremely drunk. There was an unexpected blackout during the party, so in addition to candles and battery-powered lanterns, my roommate turned on her flashlight. She was so drunk, she thought it was a person and fell in love with it. Every time the light shone on her, the flashlight was telling her it loved her too, but every time it shone on someone else, it was cheating on her.
By the end of the night, she was drunk that she dropped and broke the flashlight, and cried because she thought she killed it. I had to surrepticiously throw her flashlight out and replace it with mine, pretending that it had passed out, but wasn't dead. By the time we got back to our dorm, she broke mine too, but had fallen asleep right after, so there was no more crying.
Looking back, maybe it was a good thing this happened when smartphones didn't have built-in flashlights...
I'm not the only one who has witnessed someone doing something ridiculous when they were drunk. Redditors have both done stupid -- and in some cases, really bad -- things, and seen stupid or really bad things, and are eager to share.
It all started when Redditor S4phire34 asked:
"People who have been really drunk, whats the worst thing that you have done?"
"Had a Christmas party and there was a different party next door that was having an awards type event, I got up on stage and starting singing Jessie’s Girl. Even to this day I am mortified."
"If it makes you feel any better, at least a handful of people at that awards show probably thought it was hysterical."
"I was in a bar, thought it was open mic. Went on stage with the band (it wasn’t open mic) and sang ‘Brown eyed Girl.’"
Away From Home
"Fell asleep in the alleyway. It was dumb and dangerous. Friend found me."
"Yup! Slept in a parking garage one time."
Nothing Good Happens After 2 AM
"It was a birthday and my friends brought me a shot for every year."
"Unfortunately I got sick on the side of a major highway in Rochester, NY @ 2:00 in the morning. Even worse I wanted them to leave me there to sleep…did I mention that it was in the middle of winter?? Lucky to be typing this post."
"I lost a lot of self respect and the moral high ground in any substance abuse conversation I will ever have with those friends."
"Telling my girlfriends mother that i couldn't [sleep with] her daughter that evening cause i was too drunk to get a condom on."
"This would keep me up at night for decades."
"Wedding toast stuff. Obviously not directly but that deserves an inside joke nod."
"Went out drinking with fellow booksellers and got very drunk indeed. Had the brilliant idea to sleep close to the bookshop rather than go home. Walked around and eventually found a little hut near the car park for the attendant to work in during the day. Climbed through the window and slept in his chair."
"At some point in the night I felt very ill and rather than make a mess, I puked in the little drawer in his little desk. Filled it completely to the top, closed it, and went back to sleep. Woke up with a terrible hangover and went straight back to work. Remembered halfway through the day about the puke and have felt terrible about it ever since. Still find it hard to read Goldilocks and the Three Bears with the kids."
"Got arrested after puking on a cops shoes swearing i wasn’t drunk."
"I'm thinking if he already had to have the conversation with a cop that he wasn't drunk, it was probably for whatever started the conversation."
"My buddy told me he'd take me home after a night out. He got too drunk and didn't want to drive (good choice), so he called me a cab and got me a hoagie from Wawa."
"The last thing I remember was climbing into the cab. I really wish I could recall the events of the night after that."
"The next morning I woke up in someone's gravel driveway, no hoagie and no phone, I only had my wallet."
"I just hope I didn't ruin that cabbies night but I can almost be assured that I did."
"I was too drunk to drive so I drove my RC car to the liquor store while walking behind it and it got ran over by a drunk driver. Rip SCX10."
"Hold on just the first half of this alone is f**king hilarious. “I’m too drunk to drive, so I’ll walk there. I just need to find a car to take…”"
"Let me find my keys...er...remote."
All By Myself
"Trying to walk in higher heels than usual I fell into a swimming pool at a party where I didn't know the hosts very well. Nobody wanted to fish me out as I was wearing a long maxi dress it was hard to climb out on my own."
"So, people just straight up watched you struggle to get out while sneaking pics?"
Sound The Alarms
"Walked away from a party, went to my friends garage and slept. Woke up, went back. They had called police and coastal guard becuase they thought I had drowned or went missing."
"Nobody checked the garage? Your friends sound like the bust."
"Well everyone was drunk so no one thought about it. The garage was 2000 metres and owned by his dad. So would've thought to check there."
"I came home very drunk one time and my roommate had baked this chocolate lava cake thing with a Betty Crocker mix. I took one look at it and started f**king devouring it with a spoon. He came into the kitchen the next morning and found half of it missing with very obvious spoon marks. I don't even think he got to eat any of it. Needless to say he was pissed."
"Did you bake him one in repayment?"
"No, but I bought a replacement box for him."
""Here, more work!""
"duuuuude this is where you had to buy him a nice cake or give him the box plus his labor so like $20."
"Stole the hosts lunch in their fridge, ate it, then threw it up all over their deck and it froze over in the -30°C weather and they had to hack it off with a shovel."
"This is funny because if I didn't know the question I would guess a dog wrote this."
"I threw a chicken into a swimming pool once, and then dived in to rescue it. According to my friend, I was so distraught that I took it to bed with me to keep it warm."
"When I woke up the next morning I had no memory of the night before and found a chicken in my shower."
"I was hesitant to hit this thread cause I figured it could be really dark but this has to be one the greatest stories I’ve ever heard in my life 😂"
"Was it a live chicken?"
"Yes. It was my cleaner's pet chicken, who lived in a small pen near the pool (the chicken, not the cleaner)."
A Lucky Break
"I was 21, maybe 22. Just transferred to UW-Milwaukee. Every weekend I was going out to the bars/clubs with a bunch of international students I befriended. One weekend, we all went to a frat party where some of the guys asked me to join. I wasn’t interested at the time so politely declined."
"Fast forward a couple of weekends later, me and my buddies are at a club and I got so drunk I realized I just needed to go home. I called a cab (Uber and Lyft wasn’t a thing back then) and (in my drunken stupor) realized I didn’t have any cash on me. The cab driver was so pissed he took me all the way back to the club that he picked me up at and dropped me off."
"I started walking home, fell down and broke my cell phone so I couldn’t call anyone for a ride. While I was walking, a policeman pulled up beside me probably realizing I was completely hammered and maybe needed help."
"Not sure why, but I told the cop I was part of the fraternity that had asked me to join a couple of weeks ago. He said “wait really? I’m an alumni from there. Get in, I’ll drop you off.” Brought me right back to my dorm lol."
If only we were all that lucky!