Marriage is a complicated situation, it's been shrouded in fantasy and fairytales since the beginning of time. We've been indoctrinated to believe that it is essential for living a happy life. We're all -straight, gay and all in between- suppose to find that missing half of us to be complete. Marriage, kids, house = HAPPINESS. What a load.
Redditor u/m1ke156 wanted divorcees to discuss hindsight by asking.... Divorced members of Reddit, what is one thing you wish you asked your spouse prior to marriage?
Who do you swing for?Giphy
Are you gay? Would've saved me 7years and a bunch of heart ache. Terriberri877
Not op. We were both "taken by surprised" in some way but yes, given the benefit of hindsight there were signs. She didn't like to be touched in a romantic way and the dead bedroom. This would have been a very good indicator for anyone else but she had other issues from childhood that were also a very good explanation for not wanting that sort of thing.
At the time you are both in a straight relationship so "is it because she's/I'm gay?" is not really a thing either of us thought us.
In the end the "gay feelings" were there but not the only reason for splitting. They are however the only reason for not getting back together. We get along fine now. Kazamz
The truth is lying in wait....
Honestly I don't think it would have mattered what I asked, she still would have lied about it. AngloKiwi
This. So much this. Some people don't understand the idea of relationships working from both sides. It takes honesty on both to work and sometimes you don't realize you're being lied to until it's too late. VirtuousVice
Too Many Kids...
Are you looking for a wife, or a mother? Let me tell you, feeling more like a caretaker than a partner is demoralizing. In a much better place now. TheEggplantRunner
Yes!! I totally get this. I wasn't married to my ex but i felt like his mother 80% of the time. Always picking up after him, feeding him, clothing him. People even made comments about it! Was such an eye opener being with someone who acts like an adult. Unicorns_are_real05
You thought this through?
Why do you really want to get married? Are you sure you love me enough to want to spend the rest of your life with only me? PhantomAngel042
Who are you?Giphy
Are you a compulsive liar, narcissist and likely to sleep with anyone that shows the slightest bit interest with no care for how that effects your husband and children? Wouldn't have done any good, she'd have just lied anyway. Only_100kcal
Can you stand still?
Would you ever walk on me and our two kids after 13 years together to run off with a guy literally twice your age to that you meet on the internet, with out saying a word to me or anyone else, on our anniversary?
Yeah, explaining to a 7 and 12 year that I don't know where their mother went, or if they will ever see them again, while trying to assure them them it is not their fault was a something i never want to deal with again.
And doing this while packing up the house cause we can no longer afford to there...... evilcj925
Not really ask my spouse, but ask myself... Am I settling? "this will be fine" is not enough. cysgr8
I think thats why people are less able to be happy. Always looking for better and never being able to enjoy what is around them. Nasirammes
Sex isn't just Sex!
You're aiming to keep enjoying plenty of sex with me for the duration, right?
I don't think it was anything so deliberate on her side - just that something we both used to love mostly stopped mattering to her after the kids came along, whereas for me it never stopped being a cornerstone of what I thought intimacy should be (and such a waste of your life not to make the most of). She claimed she still loved me, but there's only a certain number of times you can hear that in a row as you lie there hurt, frustrated and despairing night after night after night...
Stayed together for the sake of the kids for a few years but then I finally left. Happy ending though - she lives five minutes up the road, we share custody, we're pretty good friends again now, and my lovely new girlfriend is utterly straightforward about - and keen on - having as much sex as she can (with me, that is!). I couldn't believe how simple that approach was when we first started seeing each other, and it's stayed that way ever since. UrsulaSpelunking
Want to discuss anything?
What are your true motivations for marrying me or, do you have any reservations/concerns. Considering she had to put on reddit that apparently she did, then ended up having motivations long term. throwaway_wubbles
A Change is Gonna Come...Giphy
"What do you expect to change once we are married?"
For me, the answer was not much. We already lived together and had a kid together. For her... Lots of things that she apparently thought were obvious but did not communicate. A brief example: a month before we got married I was driving two hours out of town for a company meeting and met with an old college friend (female, no romantic history) for lunch. No objections from the fiancè. A few months after we got married, same situation with the same girl and it was suddenly 'unthinkable' that I would do that. I asked why it was fine last time but not now and my ex wife said "because you're a married man."
I don't think it would have changed anything but it might have saved us both some heartache along the way. BarzTheOrange
Love YOU first!
Honestly, all the information I needed was available to me. I knew she was a narcissist. I knew she was emotionally abusive. I just didn't think I deserved better than that.
Depression sucks. Just because you think "I can live with this" doesn't mean you should. tenehemia
"Are you going to be faithful to me? You're not going to sleep with my brother are you?" ... Turns out, she wouldn't be faithful and she would do that. TheRegularPikachu
Your brother is also a piece of crap. Coug-Ra
Shut the Door!Giphy
I can't think of any questions I wish I had asked but there were major red flags I wish I had paid attention to. For instance, normal people don't blatantly violate your boundaries and then try to blame you for it when confronted.
Ex wife, when we were dating, went through some personal items in my bedroom without asking. I confronted her about it and she proceeded to blame me because "the door was open," as if an open door was a license to invade my privacy. You know who reasons like that? Four year olds. I learned shortly after I stupidly married her that I was married to someone with all the maturity and ethical standards of a little badly behaved kid.
I was too naive to notice the giant gleaming red billboards along the way and I didn't love myself at the time. I think part of me didn't believe I could do better. Trust me, It's far better to be single than to be married to a terrible person. dontknowbilliejean
Run and don't look back!
Prior to marriage questions: Are you going to ask me for a divorce if, when I finish college, I make more money than you? If, I do not get pregnant? Post divorce question (six years later): Now that I have a child from another man, will you go to the doctor to have yourself checked and confirmed that it was you all along that could not have children, I mean after you made me cry multiple times because I did not get pregnant at all?
Edit: Thank you for your good wishes. Yes, I am happy now. My child brings me joy. Bless you all.
A Family Affair....
Are you ever going to stand up to your family to defend me?
I am newly divorced. This huge red flag plagued me from the beginning. His entire family was abusive towards me in ways that sometimes are still too painful to even describe. Why I let them, why I stayed for so long are questions I will never have the answers to. After we signed papers in November, it was revealed he just had a baby with a woman who he has been cheating on me with for possibly at least 3 years. So I am reeling from that as well. Although we have an amazing teenage daughter who is my pride and joy, I regret the last 16 years of my life. sugarcookieprincess
Can't even give a face to face?
If you are not with someone that is committed to making the relationship work, they will LOOK for the bad things about you and turn it into a reason to get a divorce. There ARE legitimate reasons for divorce, but too many people think of it as an escape from their resolvable issues.
I overlooked how involved her mother was because they were both so warm and accepting of me. My ex had a temper and would strike me occasionally when things didn't go her way. Never enough to hurt, I'm a big guy. But since touch is my way of feeling loved by my spouse, even small punches like hers were very damaging emotionally. I asked her to not share what had happened with her mom, but she ran to her anyway. Her mother told her that it wasn't a big deal and that I was making something of nothing. Any time she did something wrong, her guilt was hushed by her mom. She left with our daughter and divorced me through a text message, then told me she was going to think about it before she filed. Two months of excruciating uncertainty later, she had her dad meet me in their driveway to tell me she was filing. MeerkatOutlaw
Who are you really?
- Do you secretly feel like a man trapped in a woman's body and wish to pursue becoming a man five years into marriage?
- Are you gay?
Both would have been pretty handy to know. I did ask by way of our previous partner's summary before marriage, but the list of women on their side of the equation weren't filled in until they acknowledged being trans and gay (or trans and not gay?). lightknight7777
This ain't the gravy train!
"Do your parents have a retirement plan?" My future plans did not include taking care of his parents due to their lack of future planning. erniezzz
It's Family service....
I would have asked her if she was okay being married to the military. She needed to be okay with all the time away from home. The long hours, the late nights, being posted with other women at work, having friends of all races and gender, etc.
Basically, my wife thought she was okay with being married and getting that sweet tri-care insurance, but she wasn't okay with any other aspect of it. So her cheating on me and divorcing me after we had a baby was actually both the worst and best thing to ever happen to me. It hurt like hell for a whole year, and then I met my current girlfriend. We've been together 5 years this February, and I'm going to put a ring on it soon. Judoka229
Be a REAL dad!Giphy
Do you know that childcare works both ways? Like, you're a father, you need to be involved. You can't just come home from work and berate me for not having a meal on the table. lastorderstime
As a father and husband, this kind of crap irritates me. Men aren't supposed to be served in a relationship, it's a mutual thing. One day, I cook, the next day, you cook if you want. Take turns. I don't mind cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, dishes, diaper changing, taking the kids out so mom gets a break or grocery shopping with them so you get a minute alone.
I'm making memories with my kids and teaching them about respect for others in doing so. xavier_grayson
We can't explain many people's actions, especially if they are peculiar.
But as long as whatever activity they're engaged in isn't hurting anybody, as well as themselves, who are we to judge?
Ah, but plenty of us will silently be judgy.
Some of the activities unfolding before us can be outright bonkers, and we just have to wonder what makes them do the things they do.
Curious to hear about how others might be perceived in public for doing certain activities, Redditor LordP*yF*ker asked:
"What’s legal but if you do it you still look like a psychopath?"
Why anyone would do the following is anybody's guess, but at least the question was answered.
They've Gotta Latte Nerve
"Going to Starbucks and ordering a milk with ice."
Going Nowhere Fast
"walking backwards in public."
"So I saw this couple walking backwards down the middle of my street and thought 'huh weird.'"
"Looked out the window 1 minute later and there they were again walking backwards in the same spot."
"Went to the kitchen window and again walking backwards, but I had never seen them walk forwards to get back to that position."
"At this point I think I'm stuck in a time loop. I show my roommate to prove I'm not crazy and this time we see them walk forwards back to the top of the street. So we watch them for several cycles just walking forwards, then backwards, up and down the street, just holding casual conversation."
"Figure it must be a workout routine or something but wtf..."
What's Up, Doc?
"Paint yourself orange, dye your hair green, stand in a hole and pretend your a carrot."
Reach For The Sky
"Flying a kite at night."
"Working out in a suit."
"I had a classmate who did phys ed (also) in a suit. He only had suits, about 20 times the very same outfit, including shoes and ties."
Could something more sinister be at work here?
After all, these activities are NOT illegal, right?
Midnight In The Garden Of Evil
"Digging holes in your backyard at night."
"Just doing some night digging."
"Wearing the skin of a roast chicken like a mask."
Here's A Treat
"Offering candies to kids with a van with homemade logos."
"Wearing a wedding gown to someone else's wedding."
"In pakistani culture its perfectly normal to wear your own wedding gown to someone elses wedding. The gowns are very color full and heavily embroidered."
Just because it's a preference doesn't mean you won't get an awkward reaction.
"Pulling your pants/underwear all the way down to pee at a men’s urinal."
"I knew a kid in elementary school who did this. Normally he would use the stalls but one time he did it at the urinal and yelled 'oops I'm not in the stall' then turned and made and held eye contact when I looked cause he yelled."
Look Ma, No Hands
"Eating in public without using your hands at all."
"Like... just face first?"
"Eating a banana with the skin on."
As a subway commuter in Gotham City, I've seen my fair share of crazy on the train.
From unprovoked altercations, to riders taking up precious sitting real estate by spreading their legs wide open, there are many offenses committed by strap-hangers all the time.
My biggest complaint is a common one and it happens as I try to exit the train and my path is blocked by commuters standing on the platform who are simultaneously rushing to get in.
It happened very recently where a guy was standing directly in front of me, and he refused to step out of the way.
I asked him, "so are you just going to stand there?" His choice to stand on solid ground gave me my answer and I aggressively nudged him out of the way with my shoulder.
I didn't have patience for it, because like many of us stepping out of the train, we had places to go.
That being said, I don't highly recommend what I did. As I said earlier, I've seen my fair share of crazy on the train and you never know who you're going to piss off.
I can't wait to be a car-owner again someday.
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One second. One moment. One decision.
They can change... everything.
Change happens with and without notice. Life happens instantly, so we have to learn to keep up.
These are all lessons we learn too late. We need more wisdom when we're younger.
We can make our lives better from the smallest decisions without knowing. But, let's start knowing.
Life will be the better for it.
Redditor ChrisVIII wanted to discuss the best ways to make living better, in the most simple of ways.
"What improved your quality of life so much, you wish you did it sooner?"
Pay attention in school.
Don't drink and drive.
Two very small and life altering decisions I wish I could've done better.
"Walking. After years of trying to run, I simply started walking. 5-7 miles a day in good weather. It is literally life changing in terms of mental and physical health." ~ Merlin560Giphy
"Adopted my block. (adoptoneblock.org) Instead of being sad about trash everywhere, I go out a couple times a week with a grabber and a bucket and just clean it up. Fresh air, a chance to connect with neighbors in a positive way, eyes on the street, neighborhood looks nicer and feels safer, zero downside."
"Adoptoneblock might only be in Oregon, but a picker is like 20 bucks for a good one (I recommend Arcmate brand; they're metal inside and last forever) and 5-gallon buckets are everywhere. Even if you only do the block around your house, it makes a huge difference. Imagine if every block got adopted." ~ binkkit
"helping people out"
"I stopped saying yes to things I didn't want to do." ~ VinnyRuns
"Holy sh*t me too! I used to do hair and eventually once I was working for myself I would say yes to literally everything all the time. Including 'helping people out' and stuff like that. I loved making people happy but I eventually got more and more miserable and ended up with a pretty heavy drug addiction."
"A bunch of years later and some really helpful therapy and I work a job that I actually love and no longer do hair for anyone other than my girlfriend or very close family. Only took 16 years of doing something I didn't really love to finally break and make the changes I needed to get what I want out of life." ~ arcaneresistance
"Taking a yearly vacation. My family never traveled growing up so I didn't know what I was missing out on but I have a good paying job with time off benefits and my wife and I have been taking a vacation every year since we got married, even if it's just something simple the time away from the usual day-to-day does wonders." ~ brshimp
"Turning off all push notifications except for essentials like financial apps or important contacts." ~ cyan_reynoldsGiphy
I'm learning so much already.
And HOW do I turn off those notifications?
"Drinking water first thing in the morning and through the day." ~ FuriousBebochoGiphy
"Swallowed my pride and got a blue collar job. For almost 20 years I followed my mother's advice, work inside so it's warm when it's cold outside and cool when it's warm outside. Now I deliver packages outside and the weather doesn't bother me. I have no boss on my shoulder and I can do my job however I want." ~ veldrinshade
"CPAP machine. If you snore at all, you owe it to yourself to get a sleep study and see what is going on. It literally changed my life getting one. I went from constant caffeine throughout the day just to function to feeling rested for the first time in years. Especially if you are overweight like I am, your heart is stopping multiple times an hour as you struggle to breathe while snoring."
"It sucks getting used to the machine (especially if you have to wear the full face mask), but man that first night of actual deep sleep will be life changing. I cannot recommend it enough and I have convinced at least 5 people that I know to get one and they all say the same thing, should have done it years ago." ~ bonez59054
The Top View
"Quit my job and moved to the mountains. I realized I cared more about what I did with my free time than whatever work I did, so I got a job where my SO and I wanted to live. We live in a cute mountain town now and every day watching the sunrise at home gives me 1000% more happiness than anything ever in Illinois." ~ starciv14
For the Zzzzzsss....
"A good bed. Game changer." ~ DividebynegativezeroGiphy
Water and bedding are essentials to happy living.
Don't be afraid, you can always start doing better now.
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Let me be real for a second.
Every time I listen to Bjork's "Unravel," my heart breaks a bit.
Have you ever listened to it?
It's on Homogenic, her third studio album, and it's incredible, passionate, smartly produced and a great showcase for her stupendous voice.
That song? An emotional rollercoaster, for sure.
There's tons of great music out there, though, and even more sad and gorgeous songs to discover.
People shared their thoughts after Redditor humanbear07 asked the online community:
"What song genuinely breaks your heart everytime you hear it?"
"Ann Wilson has such an amazing voice..."
"There's a few, but the isolated vocal track for Heart's 'Alone' is especially heartbreaking to me. Ann Wilson has such an amazing voice and her emotion really made that band."
Doesn't grow old.
There have been quite a few excellent covers of this one over the years, too.
"The first words give me chills..."
"Most songs by the late Jeff Buckley are sad on their own, and even more devastating in context. But the one that hits me the hardest is his cover of 'I Know It's Over' by the Smiths."
"The subject of the song is up for interpretation no matter what, but Jeff Buckley's premature death adds an element to it that seems to be about his life, whether he planned to or not."
"The first words give me chills the most— they happen after the classic reverby Jeff Buckley intro, the kind Hallelujah fans will be familiar with. He takes his time with this one, like he does with that."
No love for "Lilac Wine"?
It's clearly the best track.
"Ever since my husband..."
"'Merry Christmas, Darling' by the Carpenters. Ever since my husband Tom died in 2012, my heart breaks every Christmas since. We loved Christmas."
Karen Carpenter's voice hits differently when you realize how tortured her life was.
Gone too young.
"My Dad told me..."
"In My Life by The Beatles. My Dad told me when I was a teenager that he wanted it played at his funeral. I still can't listen, and when that day comes and I HAVE TO listen to it to honor his wish, I'm going to be a blubbering mess."
Sounds like you have an excellent relationship with your dad.
"My grandmother died..."
"He Stopped Loving Her Today, by George Jones. My grandmother died almost 20 years before my grandfather, and we played it at his funeral. Just typing this chokes me up a bit."
Songs have even more meaning (sometimes painfully so) when linked to specific moments in our lives, particularly the moments when we've lost people we care about.
"I'm not a Christian..."
"'Bridge Over Troubled Water' by Simon & Garfunkel. Not a Christian, but when I hear it, I understand why people believe."
A beautiful song, and timeless, too.
"My sister's husband..."
"Always on my Mind by Willie Nelson. My sisters husband chose to have it played at her funeral. And yes he was a crappy husband and she died young in a car accident."
Sounds like art imitating life, no?
"He's an amazing songwriter..."
"Jason Isbell has so many it's honestly hard to choose one. Speed Trap Town, Decoration Day, Cover Me Up. He's an amazing songwriter."
I don't know him–it's time to look him up and see how I feel.
"I can already feel tears..."
"One More Light by Linkin Park. I can already feel tears coming to my eyes just by typing this."
Chester Bennington's death was such a shock.
His music lives on.
"My brothers passed away..."
"Simple Man - Lynyrd Skynyrd."
"My brothers passed away in a car accident shortly after coming home from Afghanistan. Reminds me of them every time I hear it."
Sorry for your loss.
Hopefully hearing the song brings you peace.
Hearing a beautiful song can be an immensely moving experience.
And hearing a sad song can, for many people, help them cope with the pain of heartbreak better than they would have otherwise.
Have some suggestions of your own? Feel free to tell us more in the comments below!
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Unfortunately, a friendship could really end at any point in life.
Friends grow apart, but also, sometimes, it's just necessary to say goodbye to your relationship with a friend.
Maybe they aren't the right type of friend for you anymore, or maybe something has happened in their lives to make them self-destructive and toxic.
The reasons are many, and they are all sad.
Redditor monarchmondays asked:
"People who have unfriended their childhood friend/best friend, what happened?"
Here were some of those answers.
Bad Looking Out
"I was more-so the one who was unfriended. Was going to be the best man in his wedding. Saw his fiance out with another dude. Like on this dude."
"Told him, he told me I was wrong, Yada Yada. Things got heated. I told him I couldn't be his best man. Some years down the road, he caught her cheating."
"Called me up, asked if I wanted to grab a beer. I went. He apologized. I accepted, but we're still not friends."-TheMotorcycleMan
Friends Don't Control Friends
"He was a pathological liar, manipulative and told all of my most trusted secrets to everyone because he wanted to feel powerful and like he controlled me."
"Haven't spoken a word in 5 years and I have never looked back."-TheDandy9
Sometimes Life Is The Only Thing In The Way
"As soon as I left my hometown and my best friend growing up stayed, we both changed in opposite directions. He assimilated to the local lifestyle, quickly became friends with people he never got along with in school."
"I left, made new friends, found new things I liked. He started a family, I started a career."
"The final straw though was he RSVP'd to our wedding and then just didn't show. No text, no call, no anything. I think he was pissed that I didn't make him my best man after I was his best man, even though it was exactly because he wasn't reliable and made everything about himself that I couldn't do it."
"He caused sh*t at other people's weddings and I just didn't want to deal with what I knew would be inevitable. It did highlight though that growing up I was his best friend as a matter of convenience where I genuinely liked hanging out with him."-porscheblack
It's never fun or happy to lose a friend, but sometimes it's necessary for your healing process.
We've Reached The Point Of No Return
"I haven't unfriended her YET but I'm basically at the point where I'm sick of her drama, pettiness and 'main character syndrome.'"
"Anything that doesn't go her way is taken personally and if you disagree with her (or even have a preference that differs from hers) she will berate you into submission and 'agreement.'"
"And heaven forbid you have a life that doesn't consider her wants and desires. We're both 30, almost 31. I'm too old for that sh*t."-Deezus1229
When The Punches Come, I Go
"I met my ex-best mate in school, he had a little narcissistic personality, but I understood that and ignored his faults."
"In late Teens, we started drinking and partying as most do; this is when it became apparent that he had alcohol problems, forever being violent looking for fights, killing my good vibes, and getting me pulled into unwanted situations where I saved him or stopped him from beating on someone for no good reason."
"Throughout our life, he never attempted to fight me. He remained a pretty good friend to me until our first trip overseas to Asia; during our trip, he tried to coward punch me in the back of the head because I asked him to put out his cigarette that he had just lit."
"I asked him because we were seated in a restaurant surrounded by families, for some reason that angered him, I got up to leave and luckily heard him coming and avoided his punch, but he then tried to attack me further, which ended with us both on the ground and me on top of him while he shouted and went crazy."
"Eventually, police arrived and pointed a gun at both of us; luckily, they didn't shoot. Having foreign police aiming at me because my friend wouldn't calm down was one of the most scary moments in my life and that's saying something because I don't come from a easy upbringing."
"He was drunk, of course, and claims he doesn't remember, but there's no excuse to try and coward punch anyone, especially your best mate."
"I packed my bags that night and left our joint holiday plans in the dirt, traveling solo and having a blast. When I got back from my trip, I quit drinking myself and have remained sober for the last five years."
"Throughout that five years, I've had brief encounters with him, but our friendship was never the same. Unfortunately, my old friend never changed as he aged; he eventually went to jail."
"I work in hospitals and have seen him show up to the emergency triage, bashed with broken bones, and just a few months ago, he randomly knocked at my door where my wife answered, he was covered in blood."
"My wife went and woke me up; he had a stab wound and refused to go to the hospital; I drove him home and haven't seen or spoken to him since.. His brother updated me and said he was fine, whatever that means."-King-Callous
When He's A Predator
"I, a 5th grader at the time, knew this chick who was in the 7th grade dating a junior in hs. The dude thought she was 16 because she was lying about her age."
"They had been f**king and sexting and all that jazz...he didn't know she was a minor. I went and told him, and they broke up, and he was pissed... yada, yada yada..."
"They became friends again after a few years. When I was in the 8th grade, she called just so he could flirt with me 🤮. I was 13 then, and he was probably around 20. I blocked her real quick."-Cancerous0713
The End Of An Era
"Inseparable all through jr and HS. We graduated in 85 so no social media but I still feel ghosted. He stopped returning my calls, I always had to initiate and when we did get together he wasn't that interested."
"I gave it a few tries but I got the message and just stopped contacting him and he never reach out to me after that. I never new why and it took almost 10 years for me to get over it and stop thinking about it every day."
"I kind of wish he would have just told me he doesn't like me anymore. I have a current best friend I met in college and we've been friends for 30+ years so it's all good."-DreamArcher
There is never a right time to say goodbye to someone you once considered a trusted friend.
"My best friends young son was killed in a four wheeler accident. I was the first responding paramedic. I had to take him from my friends arms to work on him. Knowing he was dead the all along."
"We flex the child on Lifeflight then I drove my best friend and his wife to the hospital. I knew all along he was dead but they didn't. It wasn't his fault or mine that he died in any way but I could never look my best friend in the eye again."
"All I could see was his pain. So we drifted apart. I finally got to tell him and his wife before my friend died with heart trouble."-hotandhornyinbama
Secret Mental Health Leeches
"She started being nasty to my husband when we got engaged. It was so gross. She was snarky and rude to him every time he spoke and made him feel unwelcome in our own home."
"I kind of fell out of friend love with her after watching her behave like that. My mom thinks it was jealousy or something, idk. My husband is the most fun and caring person I've ever known, I expected her to be happy for me."
"In retrospect, I realized there were a lot of other red flag issues I had been ignorant of. It's been 3 years now and I am so much mentally healthier without the drama she was churning up."-ThunderHeavyRains
When Mom Damaged Her
"Had a friend I met pre-kindergarten but had a falling out in middle school. Families knew each other and we were like sisters. But sadly, her mom was a true definition of a Tiger mom. Her mom always pushed my friend to be in all of these extracurricular activities, music lessons, tutoring, etc. Her mom was always dissatisfied; nothing was good enough."
"She wasn't the most nurturing parent. But my parents were the opposite. Especially my mom, she just wanted me to be a good person and do my best. But naturally I was a very good student."
"So my friend's mom would always compare my friend to me saying I was better than her because I was naturally gifted and didn't NEED all of that help. My friend began to resent me."
"Throughout puberty, she would call me a slut because I was physically developing, tried to imply I was ugly just to see my reaction, threatened to punch me, things I understood where they were coming from but did not think were justified as I had not done anything directly to her."
"Final straw was when she posted on Facebook that she thought I was ugly so I just cut her off completely. I pitied her for her family life but her bitterness toward me was wrong. Because through my eyes, she was my best friend and all she wanted to do was hurt me. Don't regret cutting it off"-dookieconductor
The sad truth is that people are not always meant to be close, and that some people are too mentally unhealthy to have any kind of closeness in their lives.
Until they grow up, there is not much we can do but sadly step aside and take care of ourselves.
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