It feels like I scrub and scrub and scrub and still things are never fully clean.
I have no idea what spotless looks like.
Soap always leaves spots.
And as soon as you finish sweeping, there is more to sweep.
Tell me your secrets.
Redditor gossipchicken wanted to hear about all the best ways make things spic and span. They asked:
"Janitors/maids of Reddit. What are some neat cleaning tricks we can use?"
We all can use as much advice as possible when it comes to cleaning. So let's listen up.
Red Matters
Brea Grant Movie GIF by Signature Entertainment
Giphy
"Peroxide gets fresh blood out of clothes/linens if applied ASAP."
aaronkellysbones
"If it's your blood, your own spit also begins the breakdown process!!!"
littlegingerfae
Mix 10:1...
"Tri-sodoum-phosphate is my go to for anything oil/fat based. Get it in the painting prep supplies at the hardware store. It just melts though grease. You only need a tiny bit for a stain. Mix a few tbsp into your bucket for cleaning around the kitchen."
"Mix 10:1 with water to clean really really greasy messes, like between the stove and the cupboards in a new rental or to strip waxed floors. Keep the stripping ability in mind if you're cleaning anything wood, you can take off the finish if it's a strong mix or sits too long."
"Only reason it's not in all cleaning products like it used to be was overuse was causing problems with algae growth in waterways (phosphates). It's not a problem to use a bit there and there, it's more a problem if every single load of laundry done by everyone has phosphates."
Wtrset
Get the Gunk
"Former cleaning tech here. Get a scrub daddy and some bar keeper’s friend. Literally the best stuff I’ve ever used to get any sort of gunk or residue off of any surface."
alteredsauce
"Not a cleaning professional (and God bless all of you, you should be paid a hell of a lot more than you already are, no f**king joke), but barkeeper's friend, a scrub daddy, some steel wool, rubbing alcohol, vinegar, baking soda makes a hell of a cleaning kit. There are few household messes you can't fix with them."
DeepStateofAffairs
Efficiency
"Make sure the mops and brooms are long enough so you don’t have to bend. That increases your efficiency and you don’t get tired easily."
femoric9
"Man. I'm entirely freaking convinced that no mop or broom is made for people over 5'8". TF am i supposed to do when I'm holding the top of the broom at my waist? I'm disabled. Slightly bending over to do housework is the greatest source of rage (and pain) in my life and I hate it."
Original_name18
To Dust
Cleaning Tidying GIF by The Addams Family
Giphy
"Use an old pillowcase to dust ceiling fan blades, it contains the dust so you don't get the dreaded allergy ash cloud."
HauntedButtCheeks
I hate dust. And I hate ceiling fans. So good to know.
Genius
Lets Go Dancing GIF by Rosanna Pansino
Giphy
"Vacuum your way out of a room to not leave footprints. Incredibly satisfying work."
Mellokins
Slow Down
"Learned this one from a janitor. Don't scrub right away when you're mopping a floor. First get the whole floor soaked (kind of like soaking a dish with dried on food), then go back to the beginning. Anything that was stuck to the floor will be easier to clean with less work."
audiomechanic
Hot Pour
"(Restaurant janitor) Pouring Hot coffee and letting it sit for a while paired with a good follow up scrub for some reason is good at removing grease stains, I was shown this and never looked further into the why it works but it does!"
thetwin22
"Might be because coffee is slightly acidic! Really good tip as long as you clean the coffee off properly."
Fun-Calligrapher980
Relax
matt smith newspaper GIF by HULU
Giphy
"If you show up to a job and find out that the building was unused that day then make sure the garbages are empty then go find a quiet place to read for 8 hours."
jackfaire
Pay Attention
"Former custodian here. Trash bags don't need to have all that air surrounding them, wasting space in the can and making trash bounce back out, and it's surprisingly easy to get out."
"- Unfurl the bag and get some air in it, so it's not stuck to itself."
"- Shake the air out. Yes, this may sound like extra work, but the next part is cool."
"- Fling the bag, bottom-first, into the trash can, holding onto the top so it doesn't just crumple up at the bottom."
"- Blow into the bag from a foot away. The Bernoulli Effect fills the bag AND pushes out all the air around the bag."
"Now the bag fills the trash can and has its full capacity ready to use. You can even add a knot to hold the bag in place if you want, but I've found it's not needed if done right."
DuplexFields
Common
"Common rubbing alcohol is great at breaking down oily, greasy, or resinous materials that soap struggles to remove."
ApocalypseSpokesman
"Speaking of which: to clean a bong, pour in a sloshy amount of isopropyl alcohol and a heaping teaspoon of salt, and shake that fragile maraca until the residue clears up! The bowl/stem can be cleaned the same way in a ziplock bag."
Q_Fandango
Triangles
"Using a mop (the triangular dusting one they sell at Dollarama are cheap and do the job) to clean shower walls and bath. It used to take me like 45 mins to clean the whole thing. Now I can do it in 20 and don't have to bring a chair/climb on the bath sides to clean the upper walls."
LivingForMCyrus
Bristles
"Toilet brushes rarely reach all of the visible stains in the toilet bowl but the smaller size and shorter bristles on a toothbrush works wonders. Clients usually have one in the medicine cabinet or in one of the drawers but you should rinse it afterwards."
ThisIsNotWorkingOut
Ways to work
Giphy
"Clean from the ceiling down to floor, aka start high and work your way down. Dust before vacuum."
zomboi
Get out of here Muriel...
"Not a janitor or maid but baking soda is amazing for getting caked on burned shit off the bottom of your pan because you suck at cooking and you're living a lie. Just fill up the first couple inches with water, add in a bunch of baking soda, stir it up, boil the water for 5 minutes, then scrape the bottom of the pan with a wood or plastic spoon."
"Do this a couple times and you should be good to finish in the sink. And if anyone in here starts talking about vinegar so help me god. Vinegar smells like sweaty ball rot and baking soda is basically odorless. Get out of here Muriel. I'm getting me mallet."
HeroinBob138
Fantastic
"WD40 is a fantastic alternative to clean stainless steel. typical stainless cleaners leave a coating that can easily smudge, WD40 (essentially an oil that evaporates) spreads evenly then removes itself, smudges are less noticeable and dust wont cling to the surface. You just need to tolerate the smell when applying."
Orzine
Anything & Everything
Animation Wash Your Hands GIF
Giphy
"Hand sanitizer works absolute miracles on ink spillages and writing on tables (not so good on floors though, leaves a nasty stain)."
Barkeep_W_A_PewPew
No product needed...
"Not a janitor just someone who cleans sometimes... but I am all about a steam cleaner these days. Even a regular garment steamer can shine windows, eliminate fabric smells, and clean walls. No product needed, still does a really good job. Starting or following with a cleaner is great too, but not always needed."
punkishblob
Maybe now I can keep my house clean. Maybe...
When we're intoxicated, or even the slightest bit tipsy from having a little too much to drink, our immediate perspective on things is hazy.
But there's nothing like a bit of alarming news or a jarring incident to snap us out of the fog and focus on the moment.
Sometimes alcohol isn't always to blame for our impairment.
It can be a state of mind, like a perpetual numbness from being complacent in life, and all it takes is one shocking moment to rattle us back to our senses.
Curious to hear from strangers online about this type of scenario, Redditor Known_Challenge_7150 asked:
"What’s one thing that sobered you up real quick?"
These individuals were witness to shocking events that sobered them up right quick.
Bleeding Out
"Got out of a taxi and found a naked man profusely bleeding from his head crawling up the driveway in my condo. Called him an ambulance completely forgot I was absolutely wasted until 45 minutes later when I'd helped him translate and in to an amublance and stepped in my front door."
"Later a few days later learned he'd slipped in the tub and literally crawled out for help. Poor dude. He was fine but I genuinely thought he was going to die there."
– DongLaiCha
Tragic News
"At a bachelor party and we got a phone call that the groom’s father had suddenly passed."
– accountnameredacted
Bottom Of The Barrel
"I went to visit my parents back in July. I was homeless and deep into fentanyl addiction so I lost a lot of weight. My folks could see it. They knew something was up. Anyway, I spent the night and I was getting ready to leave in the morning and I looked at myself in the mirror for a good long time. I finally had enough and told them everything. They took me to detox, from there I went to rehab. Graduated in August and been living with them ever since then. I have 160 days clean and sober."
– Crotch-Monster
A reality check can be enough for some people to snap out of it.
Like Father, Like Son
"Was driving a drunk friend home, he had been on a bender again and was smart enough to call me for a lift rather than try and drive. As I helped in to his house his mother came down the stairs and said 'your as drunk as your father' and went back upstairs. I haven't seen him drunk since then, he still drinks but the thought of turning into his dad scared him out of hard drinking."
– psycospaz
Busted
"Flashing blue lights."
– FiddleOfGold
"This sobered me up just thinking about it."
– redmaple_syrup
Losing Sight
"Woke up to no sight in one eye. I had cataract surgery so just thought one of the lenses had slipped and it was an easy fix. Eye doc says nope, you had a stroke. I loved soy sauce, teriyaki sauce and salty food, which caused high blood pressure, which caused retina damage. Over six months was able to get most of my eyesight back with medication, and all back within a year. Trying to navigate life with one eye was very sobering. Started taking HBP much more seriously."
– MissHibernia
Quitting The Bottle
"Looked up someone I went to highschool with who was an awesome guy. Found out he had been dead for 3 years from alcoholism, at age 33. I made an overnight change. I hadn't started drinking that night yet, 10 months ago. Haven't touched it again since."
– omgtater
These disturbing moments were enough for Redditors to immediately come to their senses.
Unplanned House Guests
"Me and a buddy Woke up in someone’s living room, realized neither one of us knew the people, they were just nice and let 2 drunk guys sleep on their living room floor. We didn’t even say goodbye."
– Oneinsevenbillion75
Serious Health Warning
"Elevated liver enzymes."
"And the knowledge that this sh** was gonna kill me and I just couldn't orphan my family over it."
"So I opted for recovery, instead."
"Clean and sober since June 5, 2009."
– Far_Meal8674
The Joyride
"Grew up in a rural area. The little town hosted dances at the hockey arena, everyone (adults and kids) went and they overserved everyone, regardless of age. I was maybe 16 or 17 and was absolutely sh*tfaced, and jumped in the back of someone's truck with about 8 other people to go back to someone's cottage for after dance drinking. The driver (still don't know who it was) started racing one of his buddies and we whipped around small dirt roads, flying around blind corners on the wrong side of the road, going god knows how fast. It was basically a disaster waiting to happen. It was crazy scary and I was sober and thankful to be alive when we finally arrived."
– foxfood9116
The human psyche is a fascinating thing, isn't it?
How we can automatically focus on something urgent at a crucial time, even after getting buzzed from drinking too much alcohol.
But as we're in the thick of the holidays, it's a good reminder to drink responsibly and stay off the roads if you drive to your celebratory destination.
Cheers. Stay safe. And happy holidays.
We've all complained or vented about something in our lives which, in the grand scheme of things, wasn't exactly a problem, or is very easily solved.
Then there are those who complain about things that others almost hope will happen to them at some point in their lives.
These are known as "first world problems", as they are problems that pretty much only the world's one percent faces.
From having to fly business class instead of first class, or being served Roederer instead of Dom Pérignon, these complaints are often met with amusement, bewilderment, or even anger.
Redditor jennimackenzie was curious to hear the most absurd "first world problems" anyone ever complained about, leading them to ask:
"What’s the most ridiculous 'first world problem' you’ve seen people get worked up over?"
"Tale As Old As Time..."
"I once knew a mom who was legitimately devastated, to the point of tears/grief, because a doctor predicted her 8 year old daughter's final height to be around 5'2","
"Which wasn't tall enough to get cast as Belle at Disney World."
"That was the child's (and her mother's) only dream in life, apparently."
"Didn't appreciate my suggestion that she could be Minnie or Mickey."
"Lol!"
"Only a face character would do!"- TravelLovingMom
"Must Be Funny, In A Rich Man's World..."
"My boss from about a decade ago was this insanely rich dude who always went to the bank to get fresh and crisp currency."
"He'd call the bank in advance to make sure they had some on hand."
"I think he was a germaphobe."
"He had a trash can that he'd throw $1 and $5 bills in that he thought was 'dirty' and regularly just donated it vs spending it."
"I asked him why he did this and he said it was too much trouble and asked if I wanted it."
"I said f*ck yeah dumped it into my bag and when I got home it was close to $400 in singles and fives.
"Another time, he wanted to upgrade all the computers in his studio, so we went to a store and bought 10 PCs."
"They all had $150 mail in rebates and he wasn't bothered to go through the trouble of mailing them in."
"3 weeks later I received $1500 after spending a whole afternoon filling out all those goddamn forms."- azninvasion2000
Money Burn GIF by nog
Giphy
Who Wore It Better?
"When I was about 19 years old, I was at my boyfriends family BBQ."
"I was wearing this pretty floral sundress."
"His cousins girlfriend showed up in the same dress and she was SO mad that she went and changed."
"I will never understand being upset when someone is wearing the same thing as you.'
"Did you really think that your shirt you bought off the rack is going to be unique to you?"
"No."- mertsey627
Seeing Red! Or Blue In This Case...
"The blue of the balloons wasn't quite the same as the bridesmaid's sashes."
"Years ago my wife and I attended a wedding."
"It was very low key."
"The dinner was in the dining hall at the university where the couple met, cinder block walls and all."
"It was a Baptist wedding - no booze and very serious."
"The dark blue balloons attempting to liven up the hall were a slightly darker shade of blue than the sashes on the bridesmaid's dresses."
"The bride lost here sh*t and absolutely raved for nearly an hour."
"I can't remember how they finally managed to talk her down."- mechant_papa
south park wedding GIF
Giphy
See You In Court!
"Rich neighbors who end up in expensive court battles because they disagree about where a tree can be planted or whether the color of a fence fits in with the street’s 'amenity'."
'These disputes get really heated and rack up huge lawyers’ bills."
"The most pathetic part is after the judgement when they are arguing about who should pay the other party’s costs."
"Lots of affidavits filed citing the 'emotional distress' they had to endure, or painting themselves as brave warriors who were forced to take a stand to fight for 'justice'."
"Also lots of pompous litigants insisting that the judge refer to them by their 'Dr' title."
"An absolutely insane dumpster fire of entitled rich people problems."- ElectrocRaisin
It's Always People With Money Who Don't Want To Pay!
"I work in a public library."
"People will get so so mad if they have to be put on a wait list for a book."
"A popular book that just came out."
"Ok our services are not only free but so are the books."
"You’re welcome, a**holes."- Switchbladekitten
A Warm Butt Is A Happy Butt!
"My own."
"We have a bidet toilet seat (Fabulous! Everyone should have one!) and not only does it wash your bum and blow dry it, but the seat's heated!"
"It's shocking how much a heated toilet seat makes the whole process more agreeable."
"Except: We had a power outage and I went to use the toilet and the seat was cold!"
"Unacceptable!"
"This shall not stand!"
"I was really upset because it didn't feel good."
"Then I stopped and thought: This is the most first-world problem anyone's ever had."
"I was really pissed because my heiny was tepid."
"I got over it."- DeathGrover
homer simpson episode 23 GIF
Giphy
Holy Matrimony!
"Weddings are a gold mine for this question."
"People get so hyped up over their 'most important day of their life'."
"They'll destroy friendships, go into debt, and have crazy expectations."
"It's not always the couple who go crazy, either."
"Sometimes, it's the parents or another family member who feels entitled to control the wedding."
"It's just a party."
"Be considerate of guests, have plenty of food and drinks, and enjoy it."- magicrowantree
When Fast Food Isn't Fast Enough...
"Having to pull off to the side to wait for a drive-thru order to be brought out to you because your food isn't ready and there's a line building up behind you."- demanbmore
In Case You Don't Think Customer Service Employees Are Undervalued...
"I was working the return desk at a Target next to a military base so I have so many stories."
"One of my favorites was a lady who had her baby shower before revealing the gender and was livid that she had received floral newborn diapers when she’s having a boy."
"It was a huge box of super expensive, all organic diapers, that we didn’t carry and therefore could not return."
"I cannot accurately express her fury and disgust."
"How dare either suggest her boy could wear feminine diapers."
"I suggested she donate them if she didn’t want to use them and she instead threw away the entire box."
"When she left we pulled it out and threw it in our donate bin."
"There have also been multiple times where mom’s order massive toys and when we bring them out to the car they get furious that they aren’t wrapped."
"We don’t offer wrapping services."
"Here’s the thing, if you don’t want your kids to see the toys you got them for Christmas or their bit to day DON'T BRING THE CHILD WHEN YOU PICK IT UP."
'I’ve had multiple women scream and curse me out that I had ruined their kids Christmas by bringing the toys they ordered out to the car like they requested."- clever-mermaid-mae
Customer Service Waiting GIF by Juno Calypso
Giphy
Happiest Place On Earth!
"I used to work for Disney."
"That in itself should tell you everything."
"However for fun I'll give you two specific stories one form our tech department and one from my wife who worked bookings."
"I specifically worked for their call center to help with technical issues with magic band and the website."
"Suddenly got worse huh?"
"A right of passage call everyone has at least one story of is the 'Dome call'."
"Basically there is a subset of Disney Guest (TM) that believes if it rains at Walt Disney world there is someone that will push a button to encapsulate the whole of Disney property in a dome to keep out the rain."
"I'm not kidding."
"If this button is not pushed they call our tech department to angrily ask why."
"My wife worked booking."
"Pretty much everything including Bibbidi Bobbidi boutique and Pirate's league."
"These two things did roughly the same thing difference being price and theme."
"BBB was expensive did more and was focused on princesses, pirates league did a bit less and focused on mermaids and pirates."
"Lady called up my wife, and got pissed about BBB being booked up (It goes FAAAAST)."
"Karen: 'Im going to give the phone to my daughter and I want you to tell her how you are ruining her vacation by not letting her do BBB'."
"Wife proceeds to explain how pirate's league is so much cooler and how she can be a mermaid or pirate and basically gets the kid to start demanding to their parents about how they want to be a mermaid instead of a princess."- trollsong
Disney World GIF
Giphy
The horror!
Being booked into a junior suite at Disney World instead of an executive suite!
It's almost as bad as having no money for groceries, or no food to feed you children...
Said absolutely no one.
For many childhood memories are overrun by living nightmares.
Yes, children are resilient, but that doesn't mean that the things we see as babes don't follow us forever.
The horrors of the world are no stranger to the young.
Redditor -2sweetcaramel- wanted to see who was willing to share about the worst things we've seen as kids, so they asked:
"What’s the creepiest thing you saw as a kid?"
Serious Danger
"Me and my best friend would explore the drainage tunnels under the Vegas area where we grew up. These were miles long and it was always really cool down there so it was a good way to escape the heat of our scorching hot summers. We went into this one that goes under the Fiesta casino and found a camp with a bunch of homeless people."
"Mind you we are like 11 years old lol. And we just kept going like it was nothing. It wasn’t scary then but when I look back at it we could have been in some serious danger. Our parents had no idea we did this or where we were and we had no cellphones. We could have been kidnapped and never have been found."
oofboof2020
Waiting for Food
"I was at a portillos once when I was 12 and I was waiting with my little brother at a booth while my parents got our food. This guy was standing with his tray kind of watching me then after a couple of minutes he started to walk over really fast not breaking eye contact with me."
"He was 2 feet from the table and my dad came out of nowhere and scared the s**t out of him. He looked so surprised and just said he wanted to see if I’d get scared or not. He left his tray full of food near the door and left. My folks reported him but we never went to that location again since we found a better one closer to home."
nowhereboy1964
Captain Hobo to the Rescue
"When I was a pretty young teen, my friends and I were horsing around in San Francisco and started hanging out to smoke with some homeless guys. Another homeless dude came up and began aggressively trying to shake us down for anything (money, smokes, a ride, drugs- all of it) and wouldn’t take no for an answer."
"We got in over our heads and could tell this guy was now riling the other 2 guys up and they were acting like they wanted to jump us. Some grandfather-looking old homeless man appeared out of nowhere and yelled at us to get the f**k out of here- nice kids like us don’t belong down here at this hour!!"
"Captain Hobo saved our lives that night. My parents sincerely thought we were at a mall all day lol."
FartAttack911
Survival
tsunami GIF
Giphy
"I was 7 and survived the 2004 tsunami in Thailand. Witnessed the wave rise way above the already massive palm trees (approx. 40ft?) and my family and I watched/heard the wave crash into the ground from a rooftop."
faithfulpoo
These Tsunami stories are just tragic.
On the Sand
Scared The Launch GIF by CTV
Giphy
"We were a group of kids who went to swim in a local lake. And there was a dead body on the beach with their hands raised and their legs bent unnaturally that local police just took out of the same lake. I've never put my foot in these waters again."
oyloff
Be Clever
"I was walking to school and I was about 5 or 6 years old and some guy pulled up beside me in his car and asked if I would get in. He also offered me sweets to do so. I said no. The creepy bit was when he calmly said ‘clever boy’ to me, then drove off. I’ve never even told my parents or anyone else about this as it would most likely freak them out."
OstneyPiz
Bad Jokes
"Dad's side of the family pranked me by burying a fake body on our back property and had me dig it up to find valuables. Was only allowed to use a lantern for light. They stuffed old clothes with chicken bones. Sheetrock mud where the head was... Random fake jewelry as the treasures... I was like maybe 10 or 11.. I remember digging up the boot first and started gagging because it became real at that point."
Alegan239
YOU
Who Are You Reaction GIF by MOODMAN
Giphy
"Woke up to find my little brother staring at me in the dark, asking, Are you really you?"
PrettyLola2004
Siblings can really be a bunch of creepers.
No one should talk to others in the dark though.