
Anchors Aweigh!
[rebelmouse-image 18347725 is_animated_gif=Every year, over 20,000,000 people embark on cruises. For every ship that sails, between 800 -- 1,500 crew members are needed to take care of them. And just like with hotels, if you want to know what's really going on, check with the staff.
Reddit user maudiestirling asked "Cruise ship staff (cleaners in particular), what are some disturbing secrets passengers should know?"
Here is the behind the scenes look at cruise ships.
Crash Test
[rebelmouse-image 18347726 is_animated_gif=Cruise ships have a different safety standard in construction for collisions since it's so unlikely, meaning if there is a major collision it has a higher chance of sinking compared to similar sized ships but the odds are still low to sink since all ships are really well built.
Carbon Footprint
[rebelmouse-image 18347728 is_animated_gif=Worked in advertising for 2 different cruise lines. The dirtiest secret I know is that cruises are environmental disasters. Aside from the ecosystem damage a large ship can do in port, once a ship is in international waters normal fuel standards do not apply. So most burn the cheapest, dirtiest fuel they can to save money. It's gross and if you care about the planet you really shouldn't take cruises.
Most massive ships are 2 stroke engines (sometimes more on cruises to reduce vibrations). They have to use thick soupy oil to power these things, and I'm not just referring to cruises, but tankers and cargo ships. It's the only fuel that won't go up like a rocket in the pressure of a 10 ton piston.
There is literally no other fuel that can power engines that big, not because they hate the environment.
Fixed Schedule
[rebelmouse-image 18347729 is_animated_gif=When a cruise ship needs to go in for repairs they have a set schedule they have to meet and a ton of money to throw at it. Although, they pay exorbitant amounts of money for the repairs due to the schedule, every contractor has to do a rush job so a great many of the repairs are done shoddily and the ship has no choice but to just leave any unfinished non-critical work undone and sail away.
The Brig
[rebelmouse-image 18347730 is_animated_gif=I used to work as a cleaner (and bartender, and in the restaurant, and in the cafe, and in the dishes) on cruise ships in the Baltic Sea for about 4 years before I went back to school.
We do have a "jail" for the drunkards and the passengers who make a fuss, and as a clearer we started 4-5 in the morning, and every morning I usually walked past and peaked in to see what that night's bounty was.
Bugging Out
[rebelmouse-image 18347731 is_animated_gif=Ahhh. Nobody mention the roaches. Or what happens when the ship is fumigated.
Playing the Odds
[rebelmouse-image 18347732 is_animated_gif=A casino staff member told us that the poker machine payouts are set higher in the first two days to make you win, and thus make you want to play more, then as the ship enters international waters they don't need to have the same regulated payout percentages and it gets lowered so you have a very very slim chance at winning anything after the first few days.
This is why gambling on poker machines is so utterly stupid - they can be programmed to deliver payouts whenever the owners want. It's not like gambling on roulette, or a card game: those are based on physical objects which can't be manipulated like a computer program can. Hell, you could program a poker machine to never pay out, but you can't stop a roulette ball from falling in slots with a particular probability.
Inequity
[rebelmouse-image 18345312 is_animated_gif=I work in corporate for a cruise ship company. A majority of the labor workforce on these cruise ships are recruited from the Philippines, Indonesia, and India. All things being equal. A white crew member will always be paid more than an Asian. Even if they have the same job title and are doing the same work. It's pretty messed up.
Ships are very segregated with respect to culture/race and job. It's comically stereotypical on some ships, with Asians doing laundry and Indians cleaning rooms and Filipenos doing grunt work and cleaning the deck. And of course, Italians running the ship and the engine room.
Tales to Tell
[rebelmouse-image 18347733 is_animated_gif=I worked casinos on 23 ships from 89-2000. Over 400 cruises. I could write a book on what goes on. I remember a photog (cruise ship photographer) told me he was asked to go down and take photos somewhere on the lowest deck and he said there was a foot of water down there. We continued to sail for months after that. Nothing was ever mentioned about it again.
Many times I have stepped into an elevator and there were small fires in the free standing ashtrays.
I was working (if I can use this word to apply to casino staff) on a ship sailing across the Baltic from Karlskrona (Sweden) to Gdansk (Poland) with mostly Swedes as passengers. As staff on this particular ship we never did a boat drill or were issued life vests. Unbelievable I know. The Baltic is notorious for rough seas and on one of those nights (I'm talking really bad weather) after work our neighbor, totally freaking out, knocks the door and says "come look at this". We had the only 2 occupied cabins on this row. 3 cabins down the porthole had blown in and water was pouring into the cabin. The ship is flying every which way and my cabin mate starts putting on all his clothes like Joey in friends saying if we're going down I'm not leaving anything. He was a bit of an idiot tbh. I had been in worse storms (Hurricane Andrew to name one) and I'm a pretty calm person so I said we should go to the bridge and check out what's going on. There was one guy up there and he said this is normal. "It's an old ship. Don't worry." I just went to one of the bars. In the morning the ship docked and it was trashed inside. Windows broken with stuff all over the floors. No alarm was ever sounded. We sailed that evening as usual.
Running a Tab
[rebelmouse-image 18347734 is_animated_gif=Drinks at the crew bar are INSANELY CHEAPER than at passenger bars.
If I remember correctly, Carnival gave us 30% discounts, as crew members, at passenger bars, and it was still 5x more expensive than drinking below deck.
Spic & Span
[rebelmouse-image 18347735 is_animated_gif=I worked on a ship for two summers and could answer loads of questions, but the cleaning standards are very high! There's an organization I can't remember the name of that visits ships randomly to check cleanliness and if the ship doesn't meet standards they can't sail. I worked in the kids activity center and the last day of every cruise we would do a 2-hour special clean with a certain cleaning solution and rags in literally every nook and cranny. Toys get steam cleaned, toys with small holes in them get hand washed, toys with lots of crevices get cleaned with q-tips, etc. Last inspection my ship passed with like a 94% or something like that.
Outbreak
[rebelmouse-image 18347736 is_animated_gif=I've been working on ships for almost a decade now, engineering department. When the Ebola scare of 2014 went down I was crewing a passenger ferry. During a safety meeting someone asked what would happen if we got a passenger showing symptoms. We were told the ship would be quarantined until the disease had run its course. Imagine just sitting in the bay on an Ebola ridden ship.
Death on the High Seas
[rebelmouse-image 18347737 is_animated_gif=That if you die on board at sea from something other than natural causes (heart attack, old age) your death will probably not be investigated properly. Ships need to get back to port on time to load up the next set of passengers. *sweeps details under rug
Slave Wages
[rebelmouse-image 18346607 is_animated_gif=Anyone that works below deck and not always in view of passengers usually works 70-80 hour weeks while sharing a cabin the size of a closet with 4 people.
I worked as a musician on cruise ships for a year, ending a few months ago. My main concern was how the cleaning staff are treated. As a musician, we get amazing privileges. The cleaners were doing 7 hour split shifts, so 7 hours on, 5 hours off, 7 hours on, 5 hours off, every day, 7 days a week for up to 9 months straight. All of this for a basic wage of $500. It was appalling. I was on 6 times that amount, doing 3 hours work. On top of this, they're not allowed in guest areas without permission other than the corridor of rooms they clean, meaning they have to wander around the dinghy crew areas every day without barely seeing sunlight.
Modern day slavery.
Just In Case
[rebelmouse-image 18347738 is_animated_gif=Getting airlifted off a ship in a medical emergency costs a fortune, and your insurance will likely not cover it. It's the best reason for purchasing travel insurance.
Travel insurance is also cheap. I think it was $20 for a week and included like $1 million in airlifting coverage on top of other stuff.
Disembarking
[rebelmouse-image 18347739 is_animated_gif=I'm a student working sidejob on a cruise ships every week. When a ship makes a turnover at the port, we would come and help the crews doing luggage/housekeeping jobs. Since we are only external helpers, I don't know much about what happens during the trip. But during the turnover the schedule is pretty tight. Basically you have to clean rooms/deliver luggage to 3000+ passengers in around 6-7 hours. Everyone is rushed and the rooms might not be cleaned well. Sometime they don't even change the bed/pillow covers, so if you are unlucky, you might get some that have been used for weeks by 10+ people.
Also they don't care about the luggage. It gets thrown pretty violently. At the end of every shift there usually 3-4 broken wheels lying around. (Small tips: check in early, buy luggage with 4 wheels. If we can push you luggage easily, we will be more careful with it, and the later the shift gets, people will be more and more violent with the luggage since we are too tired to do it properly)
Most of the crew doing the hard work are Asian, they have to work 12-13 hours a day and only get paid 5-6$ per hour.
Pool Clue
[rebelmouse-image 18345304 is_animated_gif=Please for the love of God and all things good, do not get in the swimming pool. I bet you did not know three toddlers defecated in there within the hour did you?
This must vary by cruise. The one I was on, the pool was constantly being drained because of human waste, and they "had to" drain it each time for legal reasons.
Super Steward
[rebelmouse-image 18347740 is_animated_gif=Are the stewards trained to read minds? Or are they just amazing at their jobs? Do they have monitors watching the doors to see when you leave so they can clean?
I was taken along on a ladies cruise by a cruise-crazy family member (husband's aunt), and I'd never been on a cruise before. We stayed in the Concierge level (because the one who was paying was posh). My room steward was a Filipino man and he absolutely made my stay amazing. I asked about an extra pillow one day to use as a body pillow, and he took pillows and sheets and made me this big Tootsie roll thing for a body pillow. Every day it was re-rolled with a clean sheet. I loved the toiletries and used up an entire bottle of lotion every day on my sun-burnt body, so each day I began finding 3 bottles of lotion with the clean towels. I ordered an iced tea with 2 lemons in my room after dinner 2 nights in a row and for the remaining nights of the trip, when I came back to my cabin after dinner there was a cold iced tea, 2 lemons each time. I swear the second I left the room for meals it got cleaned or turned down or fancied up. I was a poor slob who spent a week feeling like a queen because of that guy. I asked my posh host about tipping etiquette at the end and she gave me an envelope for him. It had $400 in it. I added another $100 from my spending money. He made the trip for me. Thank you, Filipino steward dude on my Celebrity cruise in April 2013, you rock.
Proposals
[rebelmouse-image 18347741 is_animated_gif=We had a couple leave out 7 sex toys on the counter with a note asking if their steward would like to join the fun.
The note had a yes, no, maybe check box, like in 3rd grade.
We All Go Sometime
[rebelmouse-image 18347742 is_animated_gif=I was touring a ship for a future event. The ship was about to leave for a 100+ day cruise. I saw alot of old people getting on with oxygen tanks. I asked him what happens if they die on board. He said it was very common for old people blow their life savings to come spend their last days on this cruise. He also said they have a fully functional morgue.
A lot of people die. Depending on the line, it's not unusual for a couple a week. Depending on the age of the ship, there are decent odds someone died in that room. Also, if you receive an upgrade mid cruise, there's a reason why a room is suddenly available.
Is There a Doctor on the Ship?
[rebelmouse-image 18347743 is_animated_gif=1: Don't go to the cruise ship infirmary for anything to do with a stomach or bowel problem.
You will likely be quarantined in your cabin for 24-48 hours as a precaution for gastrointestinal disorders; those issues can be very contagious on a cruise ship. So that means if you need Immodium or drank a bit too much and feel queasy, you better get those OTC medicines in port. Forgot to tell my dad that when he went on his first cruise 3 months ago...whoops.
2: Cruise ship doctors just have to be licensed in their home countries...regardless of very different requirements in certain parts of the world.
I got strep throat 8 days after starting my second contract for my 3rd time as an adult. Cruise ship doctor insisted that I only had tonsilitis, despite my previous experiences and symptoms, and under-dosed me with penicillin. Spread into my skin, which they proceeded to tell me it is shingles. They couldn't understand why I didn't believe them. Finally convinced the ship/company to let me see a dermatologist in port. Bam, I was right-strep infection that had spread. That doctor was fired after he misdiagnosed numerous other very treatable things for passengers.
In general, you shouldn't trust a cruise ship doctor.
Have you ever heard of a certain job that people call a career and thought... "PEOPLE PAY YOU FOR THAT?!?!"
All hard, honest work is good work.
And then there is just trash work.
And I don't mean garbage collection, that is honest work.
I don't know how some people live with themselves.
Redditor MrTuxedo1 wanted to discuss the careers they don't believe people should chase. They asked:
"What job do you have no respect for?"
Ticket scalpers. How do you the audacity to say that's a job?
Actual burglars have more empathy.
Disrespectful
"There are debt collectors who call relatives of the deceased to pay off their debts when they are not legally obligated to."
Top_Gun_2021
Shady. Shady.
"Australian Real Estate Agents. Laws don't seem to apply to them. Just as dodgy in sales and rentals alike. Never seen anything like it overseas."
snave_
"I'm in the US, it can vary state by state but my state is pretty strict on realtor laws. Some states require attorney review and there are definitely penalties for being reported for shady sh*t. It does require consumer reporting though."
ilostmytaco
Etransfer
"Where I live, tax info was leaked and now scammers are targeting low income individuals/families (people earning under 30,000 per year) with etransfer scams. I got one the other day that was an etransfer warning that 240$ 'a family member sent me' was about to expire."
SnowyInuk
"That’s disgusting. The scammers know what they’re doing, they know the harm they cause people and yet they don’t care."
surelysandwitch
Should be illegal...
"MLM managers. Not the low level idiots that get suckered into it, they suck too for trying to bring new people into that sh*tshow, but the people who create them know exactly what they are doing and are pretty much the only ones who profit off of it. Should be illegal. Pyramid schemes are illegal. None of them ever get the just desserts except occasionally by vigilantes I assume."
Wereno
I hate debt collectors. Yeah, you calling me one hundred times a week is going to miraculously make money appear.
Animals
"Paparazzi."
VictorBlimpmuscle
"I met Jack Gleeson (King Joffrey from Game of Thrones) at a bus stop in Dublin. Really nice guy but he said he quit acting due to people being nasty online and constant hounding from paparrazi. He's happier now but it sucks that he was pushed away from a career he was quite good at."
goobi94
Scumbags
"The pastors at mega churches whom ask their followers for money for private jets. Absolute scum to abuse others faith for your own greed."
ichancho
"Brian Tamaki is a greedy freaking pig, he takes advantage of so many people who are already struggling. Every time he’s in the local news (which btw is often) I get more and more pissed off at him and his wife. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brian_Tamaki "
surelysandwitch
it’s a thing???
“'Dating Expert.' Sadly it’s a thing. It’s basically a self appointed title that requires no training or qualifications. What’s worse, is that I have a female friend who uses one. It’s very much a blind leading the blind situation."
Mean_Manufacturer_61
"Most of the self proclaimed “dating coaches” I know are women in their late 30s or early 40s who have never been married or had a longer relationship."
ipozgaj
EVIL
"Poachers. Especially big game poachers who purposefully hunt nearly extinct animals from species they know they are on the brink."
"I know there are poachers that come from rural villages who are trying to just put food on the table, which has my sympathy but poachers who come from money and hunt down animals minding their business in most shelters or restricted areas just to put a head on their wall as a trophy are absolutely heinous."
GetterdoneObiwan
I See It All
"Psychic Mediums. Specifically those who prey on the grieving."
JamesDeadite
"I've always found it interesting how many magicians go after people like this. I think it's because they know what it takes to trick people for the art. The slight of hand and mentalism. And they abhor people who use these tactics for such sh*tty purposes."
34HoldOn
I want so bad to believe in psychics and mediums. What say we on that topic?
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The nose is constantly being attacked by odors of the world.
Going through one day without having to hold my breath during a certain point, is a miracle.
Of course, I'm a New Yorker, so I maybe exaggerating for people in the countryside.
What's funnier is odors that are pleasant, that shouldn't be.
Have you ever looked and something and thought... "yuck."
But then you smelled it and it was like... "oh lovely,"
Redditor HappQueue wanted to know what aromas are arousing to the senses that may come as a surprise to many. They asked:
"What smells good but shouldn't?"
For some odd reason I love the things burning. Anything, food, pots, pans. You name it. Weird.
Blow
"Matches/candles on a birthday cake. I remember lighting matches as a kid purely to blow them out and inhale that sweet match-y smell."
semispooked
"guilty good"
"I work at a Chemical plant. We make a highly acidic product that is dark blue, viscus, highly corrosive, and smells exactly like Fruit Loops. It is incredibly disturbing."
Turin082
"Organic chemistry has many 'guilty good' smells. Thiophosgene (sulfur derivative of a chemical weapon used extensively in WW1) apparently smells like meat. Phosgene is used to make polycarbonate, thiophosgene is used to make some sulfur-containing molecules which eventually end up in therapeutic drugs."
HammerTh_1701
I can't huff it...
"Paint, specifically house paint. I love the smell. But anytime I hear that anyone is painting a room or their house, I volunteer. I just love sitting on the floor in a room that's been freshly painted, closing my eyes and just inhaling that slightly chemically, slightly creamy aroma."
Neowza
A Hint of French...
"A fish and chips shop burnt down as couple blocks from work a few years ago. The whole neighborhood smelled amazing for days. Just the slight hint of French fries. Nothing overpowering. It was so awesome. Until I found out someone was trapped in the fire and died."
stevey_frac
Drag
"Race fuel. Instantly puts me in a good mood as it reminds me of going to the drag races with my dad when I was young."
garfnodie
Fuel and matches get me too. And they sort of go together. Interesting.
Just like the Movie...
"The water from the Pirates of the Caribbean ride. Mmm, bromine."
Stalkerslovemy
"This is one of my favorite scents of all time, and Disney is very aware that people enjoy it. Evidently it’s a lot harder to recreate than just adding bromine to water."
cash4panties
"black widow".
"There's a chicken wing restaurant near my house that has a challenge sauce called "black widow." The owner claims it to be around 500,000 scovilles. A few years back some buddies and I decided to try them, the sauce was a dark molasses color and smelled almost like a BBQ sauce, no hint of the danger that lurked at all. We each grabbed one wing and it went terribly. I don't know how something so spicy could smell so innocent."
Final-Chapter
Endless Weekend
"Hotel/rented rooms whenever you go on vacation. There's this particular smell that just says 'you are on vacation,' especially on a beach/swimming trips/out-of-the-town vacays."
Yummy_Llama
"Bath and Body Works has a plug-in scent called Endless Weekend that replicates that scent (to my humble nose)."
Exxcentrica
"oh no..."
"Someone you are attracted to's body odors. Anyone else who is slightly unhygienic smells repulsive."
Mini_gunslinger
"I remember back in high school a girl leaned over, sniffed me, told me that I smelled really good, and asked me what cologne I was wearing. I asked if she was joking, and she's like, no, you smell really good. When I told her I had just gotten done with gym class, she gets a small 'oh no...' look on her face and turns away. I think we both had a revelation that day."
user deleted
That Smell
"The smell inflatable things give off. I have no idea how to describe it, but it’s… nostalgic? to me."
crestfxllen
I do love the smell of plastics and inflatables. Ahh....
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At one point in time, we've misplaced things that we've considered priceless possessions.
It's hard to imagine how to go on without the lost object–whatever it may be–but over time, it becomes a distant memory and we move on.
That is until we magically find ourselves presented with this opportunity proposed by Redditor mikehotel288, who asked:
"You find yourself in a room with everything you’ve ever lost in your life. What do you look for first?"
There are necessities people cannot do without.
No More Dry Lips Ever Again
"Gonna be a lot of chapstick in that room."
– camefromxbox
There are things that bring us comfort and are irreplaceable.
Safety Blanket
"My baby blanket. It became tattered over the years—to the point where I couldn’t reasonably wash it anymore—so I had to throw it away a little while back."
"I have heavily regretted that decision. I was really attached to it (hence it being in tatters), but I really wish that I kept what was left of it instead of throwing it away. Just knowing that I’d still have it would be a huge comfort to me."
– Uearie
Sentimental Heirloom
"The pendant my dad had made for me with my grandmother’s engagement diamond. It was 2 carats. It disappeared from a Las Vegas hotel room 20 years ago. It was hidden deep in a suitcase where it would not have been easy to find. It was just GONE. Cops didn’t do anything. Didn’t even come to take my statement. Cleaning lady said she thought she saw an elderly man enter my room. The guy I was with was not sympathetic in the least. Entire situation was f**ked. I’m still so upset about it."
– MaritimeDisaster
Lone Shark
"My plastic shark toy I lost when I was 10. Ain't no f'king way it just VANISHED."
– Guilty_As_Charged__
Not everything lost is tangible.
Tick Tock
"The time I wasted."
– shinyfennec
It Holds Value
"My private key with 6 BTC in it."
– Significant_Mirror19
"I didn't lose one, but I'll check my room for yours just in case."
– Smodphan
Finding Purpose
"The reason I walked into the room."
– Lloyd_lyle
Lost Opportunity
"That one girl i spoke to on omegle lol"
– h-amishh
If only we get to reunite with those we've lost.
The Loved Family Member
"My grandpa."
– Splatty_boi_420
Grieving Parent
"My daughter. She’ll be in my brother’s arms. So I’ll find both things I care to look for."
– SeeTheFence
Missing Mom
"My mom. She died of cancer in 2017. She never got to meet my daughter. I miss the hell out of her and wish she was still part of my family’s life."
– X-Arkturis-X
The Animals That Come Into Our Lives
"My pets that have passed: especially my horse, Blue. It's been 4 years, but it feels like just yesterday."
– Baciandrio
While many of these scenarios are unlikely, the thread gave people an opportunity to reflect on the things that made a strong impression on their lives.
Sometimes, the memories of the things we've lost–whether they are random objects or sources of love–is all we have.
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What's worse than returning home from a night out or a workday and discovering your home was broken into? Being home when the break-in happens.
Home invasions are a common trope portrayed in horror films like The Strangers and Funny Games, and they're absolutely terrifying because they are based on real-life incidents.
Redditor silentagent47 asked strangers to consider this horrifying hypothetical.
"You have 5 minutes to prepare before a guy breaks into your house with the intention to kill you. You can not exit your house. What is your strategy to survive?"
The hunter becomes the hunted, inspired by TV and movies.
Duplicating A Scene
"There was an episode of Burn Notice where Michael puts aerosol cans in the microwave with kitchen utensils and hits popcorn button. I really want to know if this works or not."
– JohnSterlingSanchez
Epic Burglar Trap
"Speed-watch Home Alone."
– pluribusduim
It's about the choice of weapon.
Jump Scare
"I get the vacuum cleaner ready in a certain room, I turn it on as hes about to enter to create a distraction, then I jump out when he's inspecting the noise and bonk the f'ker on the head with the piece of 2 inch steel tube I keep as a weapon."
– BustedBastard
Beware of Dog
"Unleash the Hounds"
– myassonreddit
Make A Weapon
"Duct tape a bunch of knives to the end of one of those tall lamps to make a spear of blinding and then proceed to go sicko mode."
– DubTheeBustocles
Preparing For A Thwack
"Turn shower on, for some reason I have a shovel behind my wardrobe?? So grab that. Wait for him to check shower, whack with shovel. Boom."
– hypersp00p
It's Just A Game
"Corner camp with a shotgun."
– Arrow3619
A Warm Welcome
"Hairspray and a lighter to his face."
– WorkingClassSheep
The effectiveness of these tactics are questionable, but points for creativity are warranted.
Stand Still
"Put a lamp shade on my head and stand in the corner of the room."
– Cannabis_Sir
Make It Erotic
"I turn on all the lights, take off all my clothes, rub butter all over myself, and start a fake conversation on the phone. As soon as he breaks in I say into the phone: 'I’ve gotta go, my next appointment is finally here…”
– FrankieTheAlchemist
Forget The Stairs
"Go to the LIVING ROOM."
– on-oath-never-again
Removing The Element Of Fun
"Draw an X on my forehead and grab a beer."
– Candycoatedmuffin3
And that's why I would opt for living in a commune or apartment complex.
People who own houses are just asking for forced entry.
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